Grandma in a coma I know I know it's seriousWell, at least it is not a post about guns, which is the only thing we can say about it without our head spinning around until it tears itself from our slender neck. News comes that by the end of the month, Louisiana will “save” all of $3 million by discontinuing hospice care for its poor folk. (It will not “save” anything, as the people who currently get hospice care will just cycle into ERs and ICUs instead.) Because poor folks with cancer were livin’ too high on the hog with their peaceful, palliated deaths surrounded by love ones and really nice nurses.

Everybody here loved someone who went through hospice, right? And we all were grateful for the gentleness of their passing? WELL FUCK GRANDMA MILLIE IN THE ASS, there will be no more dying in her own bed, surrounded by her grandchildren (maybe saying the rosary? Grandma Millie always got great comfort from saying the rosary), with a nurse stopping in to check on things and drop off more morphine (which you will hide from your uncles and cousins in the back of a cabinet until the nurse comes back to pick up the leftovers, because you are not an idiot). Nope, Grandma Millie will be hooked up to some more machines, for a good month or so, just like she always dreamed.

But as long as Bobby Jindal gets to turn down some Medicaid funding from the Kenyan impostor, it is totally worth it.


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