MANGER LE RICHE  1:21 pm December 19, 2012

Gerard Depardieu Pees On France

by Rebecca Schoenkopf

Sex beastThe last time we heard from potato-faced “sex” symbol Gerard Depardieu, he was peeing all over the aisle of an airplane because a stewardess didn’t wash his socks or something. Now he is peeing on the entire nation of France, because he doesn’t like paying his taxes. That’s right, France, your gain (of having Gerard Depardieu move to Belgium) is Belgium’s loss (having Gerard Depardieu move to Belgium).

We think we did the math right here. Depardieu says that this year, he paid 85 percent of his income in taxes, and that over the past 45 years he has paid 145 million Euros. If that 85 percent had been steady the whole time (which it was not; the new high 75 percent marginal rate for the super-rich is brand-new), that would have meant he had earned 170 million Euros and had been left with only 25 million Euros, which of course is reason enough for anyone to go Galt. Since French tax rates are not pictures of cats or celebrities, we were unable to find tax rates for the superwealthy over the last 50 years. But they were definitely less than 75 percent. Because, again, that is “new.”

Now, the only income we could find for Depardieu showed that he has made 19.3 million Euros (plus $5.5 million US, a combination which at this particular moment would be worth around $30 million US) since 2006. This does not count any income he might have made from his vineyards in Italy, France, Argentina, Morocco and Algeria. Or from his two Paris restaurants. Or like capital gains or whatever. That is only $5 million a year. And then France wants to tax it??? HOW IS GERARD DEPARDIEU EVEN SUPPOSED TO LIVE?

You guys, Gerard Depardieu is practically a pauper now. We can see why he would want to take his Newport Harbor boat parade and go home.

[Telegraph]

 
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{ 136 comments }

nounverb911 December 19, 2012 at 1:22 pm

Will they even notice?

sullivanst December 19, 2012 at 1:37 pm

Apparently they noticed enough to tell him to go and boil his bottom, or something.

You have a point though, it's pretty sad when he's described as '“Cyrano de Bergerac” and “Green Card” star'… uhhuh, and what has he done since 1990?

TribecaMike December 19, 2012 at 6:00 pm

Claude Chabrol's Inspector Bellamy (2009) is pretty good and well worth torrenting checking out. Mmmm, Marie Bunel … http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1188983/

sullivanst December 19, 2012 at 6:36 pm

Like French films count! ;)

TribecaMike December 19, 2012 at 10:08 pm

Good point, but Marie Bunel can count to dix on my toes any jour de la semaine. http://static1.purepeople.com/articles/9/20/86/9/

Negropolis December 20, 2012 at 1:51 am

Marion Cotillard libel!

Barbara_ December 19, 2012 at 1:23 pm

Yikes, his face needs more work than Mount Rushmore. It looks like he was bobbing for fondue.

valgal2342 December 19, 2012 at 1:44 pm

But it is fun to pronounce his name… Gerard Depardieuuuuuuuuu!". Which I think translates as: penis nose.

glasspusher December 19, 2012 at 1:23 pm

Holy smokes. Looks like he's blown up like a dead dog!

Loch_Nessosaur December 19, 2012 at 1:23 pm

Big oaf.

hagajim December 19, 2012 at 1:23 pm

At least he didn't Gerard Depardeuce on France.

snowpointsecret December 19, 2012 at 1:24 pm

I guess the French had too much Meat Loaf by the looks of that picture.

BornInATrailer December 19, 2012 at 1:51 pm

There ain't no way he's ever gonna pay that. Now he's just mad.. cuz 3 outta 4 is bad.

nounverb911 December 19, 2012 at 1:24 pm

What? Monaco wouldn't take him? They seem to take everyone else in Europe who has money.

glasspusher December 19, 2012 at 1:25 pm

The Great Equalizer

savethispatient December 19, 2012 at 1:47 pm

Yeah, or Switzerland, for that matter. The irony is that Belgium does have a lower top rate of tax – only 50%. Belgium is not a famous tax haven.

Biel_ze_Bubba December 19, 2012 at 8:14 pm

He's nowhere near rich enough for Monaco.

ManchuCandidate December 19, 2012 at 1:24 pm

Lui?

hagajim December 19, 2012 at 1:25 pm

He's a smug looking little frog isn't he.

nounverb911 December 19, 2012 at 1:25 pm

Maybe when their taxes go up to 39%, the Koch boys will move to Belgium too, also.

MissTaken December 19, 2012 at 1:32 pm

Fingers crossed!

skmind December 19, 2012 at 1:25 pm

He was robbed of an Oscar in 'Green Card', so will Irony strike as we now deny him one?

glasspusher December 19, 2012 at 1:30 pm

If it's in France, there's a good chance that Irony is already on strike.

zippy_w_pinhead December 19, 2012 at 1:34 pm

Always strike while the Irony is hot…

TribecaMike December 19, 2012 at 6:13 pm

Droit Jerry Lewis?

noodlesalad December 19, 2012 at 1:26 pm

How the fuck does this guy make $30 mil in a few years? Worst Columbus EVAH

DixvilleCrotch December 19, 2012 at 1:27 pm

I liked him in Life of Pi / Pee though.

CrunchyKnee December 19, 2012 at 1:27 pm

Dudes been eating his profits.

chascates December 19, 2012 at 1:27 pm

There seems to be an actual correlation between plumping up like a fat Marlon Brandon and then doing crazy shit like he did.

glasspusher December 19, 2012 at 1:30 pm

Correlation does not imply causation, but I'll try to stay thin nonetheless.

Mumbletypeg December 19, 2012 at 1:27 pm
glasspusher December 19, 2012 at 1:31 pm

Bomb Voyage!

IncenseDebate December 19, 2012 at 1:27 pm

gros cochon!

Boojum December 19, 2012 at 1:28 pm

It looks like he should combine some of this with this.

Pragmatist2 December 19, 2012 at 1:28 pm

The French are always arguing with their government. DeGaulle said "It is impossible to govern a country with 246 varieties of cheese."

JustPixelz December 19, 2012 at 2:33 pm

Especially if one of those cheeses is named "Gerard Departdieu".

Negropolis December 20, 2012 at 1:53 am

DeGaulle was just pissed that he couldn't formalize his dictatorship and personality cult, to be honest.

edgydrifter December 19, 2012 at 1:28 pm

Le meh.

LesBontemps December 19, 2012 at 1:29 pm

From his picture, I'm guessing his move to Belgiun was actually motivated by the waffles.

BornInATrailer December 19, 2012 at 1:36 pm

And to be able to load his pomme frites avec mayo without being shunned.

cousinitt December 19, 2012 at 1:29 pm

Frankly, the miserable fat Belgian bastards deserve him. http://youtu.be/PrvXoin9NcA

OneYieldRegular December 19, 2012 at 1:29 pm

Gerard Depart/adieu.

Baconzgood December 19, 2012 at 1:29 pm

That's a lotta My Father the Hero moola.

MissTaken December 19, 2012 at 1:29 pm

This is so sad, you guys. Now when he pees on an airplane, it will be in coach. Sacre bleu!

slithytoves December 19, 2012 at 1:30 pm

Since French tax rates are not pictures of cats or celebrities, we were unable to find tax rates for the superwealthy over the last 50 years.

I'm using that at the next meeting when someone asks me a question!

SayItWithWookies December 19, 2012 at 1:30 pm

Il y avait trois hommes une fois, mais maintenent il ne reste que le bébé.

glasspusher December 19, 2012 at 1:37 pm

"The French don't have a word for 'entepreneur' "- George W Bush

SayItWithWookies December 19, 2012 at 1:51 pm

Oops — I was certain enough not to look it up, but I had thought Depardieu starred in the original French version of Three Men and a Baby — apparently he did not. Anyway, the statement above ("There used to be three men, but now there's only the baby") would've made a lot more sense in that context.

TavariousChinaSmith December 19, 2012 at 4:35 pm

Your mistake is forgiven: there was a time in the 80s when he seemed to be in every single film made in France. It was incroyable.

TavariousChinaSmith December 19, 2012 at 4:36 pm

Speaking of which, il a un foie gras.

IncenseDebate December 19, 2012 at 1:30 pm

You'd think he'd love surrendering his taxes. Because French.

TootsStansbury December 19, 2012 at 1:30 pm

So how is sour grape wine? Anybody tried it?

mormos December 19, 2012 at 2:02 pm

Surprisingly bitter

ProgressiveInga December 19, 2012 at 1:31 pm

I'm sure there are many acting roles in Belgium for men with a nose like a penis.

sullivanst December 19, 2012 at 1:43 pm

Given one of Belgium's most famous landmarks, both his nose and his aviation habits suggest he'll fit right in.

Crank_Tango December 19, 2012 at 1:31 pm

Um, doesn't Belgium have even higher taxes than France? Or is that just for po folks. On the plus side, it's even closer to Amsterdam and has some great beer.

zippy_w_pinhead December 19, 2012 at 1:31 pm

France bids adieu to Depardieu…

BornInATrailer December 19, 2012 at 1:31 pm

I can't decide if the crease at the end of his nose makes the nose look more like a butt or a dick.

MissTaken December 19, 2012 at 1:33 pm

The rest of the nose looks like a little shaft, so I'm going with dick.

larrykat December 19, 2012 at 1:56 pm

Cock, for sure.

Baconzgood December 19, 2012 at 1:31 pm

Fat washed up actor leaving France? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON!!!!!

poorgradstudent December 19, 2012 at 1:32 pm

The last time someone in France did this (it was some business magnate whose name I'm too lazy to search for) a large segment of the press, even the center-right newspapers, called him out for neglecting his patriotic duty, even treason. I'd be surprised if Depardieu doesn't get the same reaction just because he's an actor.

elviouslyqueer December 19, 2012 at 2:06 pm

Actually, PM Ayrault did call him out.

doloras December 19, 2012 at 2:41 pm

So did quite a few other legislators and a few other actors, even. (This has been all over the French-language teevee news for the last week.)

Allmighty_Manos December 19, 2012 at 1:32 pm

Tip O' Neill really let himself go

johnnyzhivago December 19, 2012 at 1:33 pm

WTF is happening to Wonkette??? First kitten photos every other post and now news about a foreign guy, a FROG no less????

Mumbletypeg December 19, 2012 at 1:38 pm

I have absolutely no idea what you could possibly be talking about.
However, to go O/T on your OT: yesterday your little wisecracks during the most teeth-gnashing topics of discourse that otherwise might see me bloody-eyeballed like Daria's dad, got me laughing plenty; my funnybone thanks you~

johnnyzhivago December 19, 2012 at 1:44 pm

Tell your funnybone it's welcome!!! :)

snowpointsecret December 19, 2012 at 1:41 pm

When most of the US news lately is related to someone shooting a bunch of kids in a school, maybe looking abroad for snark is a good thing.

ttommyunger December 19, 2012 at 1:33 pm

So, France has its own Donald Trump?

freakishlywrong December 19, 2012 at 1:34 pm

I'm glad to see that France has it's share of randian, tax dodging fucking plutocrats as well. Unfortunately, it works out a little differently for them in France.

Whollyholeyholy December 19, 2012 at 1:34 pm

Being way too serious, I used to live in France and know a lot of people there. One is a Belgian who wanted to stay in the US after his expat assignment was cut short. An American accountant looked into everything and told him to go back–his take home pay would amount to more there, when considering how much he would have to spend out of pocket on things that are taxpayer funded in France. He (and family) left.

Baconzgood December 19, 2012 at 1:34 pm

Looking at him is a case FOR pasturising cheese for some reason.

larrykat December 19, 2012 at 1:52 pm

And having your old chimney tuck-pointed.

Baconzgood December 19, 2012 at 1:36 pm

That dude has a dick where his nose should be.

DahBoner December 19, 2012 at 1:39 pm

Ze French mak louve with ze mouth.

Baconzgood December 19, 2012 at 1:42 pm

Owen Wilson syndrome.

TavariousChinaSmith December 19, 2012 at 4:39 pm
Baconzgood December 19, 2012 at 5:48 pm

I feel slightly hurt that you included a link to that snark. Like Baconz don't know who Cyrano DeBergerac is? That stings.

TavariousChinaSmith December 20, 2012 at 6:31 pm

Oh, Baconz! Of course you know. Some other less worldly Wonketteers might only know the story through Roxanne and would thus miss out on the whole Depardieu tie-in. Never Baconz, though.

Lascauxcaveman December 19, 2012 at 1:36 pm

He's sort of like the Mel Gibson of France, isn't he? Once young, handsome, universally admired; now old, bloated, bitter and undertaking bizarre meltdowns in public.

larrykat December 19, 2012 at 1:52 pm

plus jews

zippy_w_pinhead December 19, 2012 at 1:36 pm

"Now he is peeing on the entire nation of France"

maybe they got stung by a jellyfish…

DahBoner December 19, 2012 at 1:37 pm

I loved his role in The Life of Pi where he played a French asshole.

But now it looks like he wasn't "acting"…

BornInATrailer December 19, 2012 at 1:38 pm

You know who else thought the best way to circumvent the French government was a trip to Belgium?

BaldarTFlagass December 19, 2012 at 1:52 pm

Alfred von Schlieffen?

Chow Yun Flat December 19, 2012 at 1:56 pm

Paul de Man?

Rebootably_Joe December 19, 2012 at 3:36 pm

The Duke of Wellington?

TribecaMike December 19, 2012 at 6:14 pm

Le Pétomane?

RevNimshi December 19, 2012 at 1:38 pm

You need to cut back on the Foie Brah

ProgressiveInga December 19, 2012 at 1:39 pm

I would like to take this opportunity to personally invite another great French actor, Catherine Denueve, to move into my house. "Catherine, call me!"

southernboyman December 19, 2012 at 1:41 pm

Well damn, who doesn't want to pee on France?

TribecaMike December 19, 2012 at 4:08 pm

Eleanor of Aquitaine?

Whollyholeyholy December 19, 2012 at 1:41 pm

He's more Javert than Valjean, non?

BornInATrailer December 19, 2012 at 2:02 pm

I think he'd have to play Sweatpant Valsweatpant now.

BigSkullF*ckingDog December 19, 2012 at 1:42 pm

Fucking Belgians deserve this peice of shit.

Goonemeritus December 19, 2012 at 1:43 pm

Say what you want about France but at least it isn’t Belgium. Belgium is only famous for two things, chocolate and pedophiles and they only make the chocolate to attract the kids.

zippy_w_pinhead December 19, 2012 at 1:56 pm

what about the waffles?

BaldarTFlagass December 19, 2012 at 1:58 pm

And the Belgians are nothing more than French, with an occasional bath mixed in.

Wile E. Quixote December 19, 2012 at 2:03 pm

How unfair, if it weren't for the Belgians and the civilizing influence they bought to the Congo we wouldn't have Heart of Darkness or Apocalypse Now.

Fuck Toad December 19, 2012 at 5:56 pm

Lambic libel!

chascates December 19, 2012 at 1:43 pm

Think instead of the young Depardieu, 10 million croissants ago: http://www.kinolorber.com/video.php?id=1239 http://www.linternaute.com/cinema/diaporama/06/ca

shelwood46 December 19, 2012 at 2:37 pm

He was never really attractive. His whole appeal was his charisma, which seems to have disappeared completely.

larrykat December 19, 2012 at 2:59 pm

He has a nice rack in those photos.

chascates December 19, 2012 at 6:32 pm

I think that's a female between Depardieu and that other guy.

BaldarTFlagass December 19, 2012 at 1:44 pm

Guess he's going DeGault?

DalePues December 19, 2012 at 1:45 pm

les miserables

rickmaci December 19, 2012 at 1:49 pm

Check me that I got this correct. There are actually people not related to him that actually give a flying fuk what happens to Gerard Depardieu?

PinkoMoonbat December 19, 2012 at 5:21 pm

Sort of. They say he's a dick. Not sure I'd go so far as to call it a flying fuck.

larrykat December 19, 2012 at 1:51 pm

Potato libel.

larrykat December 19, 2012 at 1:55 pm

Don't let le portre hit you in your fat le ass on the way out.

Chow Yun Flat December 19, 2012 at 1:55 pm

Gerard's face was on fire and someone put it out with a golf shoe.

BornInATrailer December 19, 2012 at 1:58 pm

Cyrano de Big Mac?
Green Liver?
My Father Likes Heros?

I<3Radio December 19, 2012 at 2:01 pm

I like when Innanity, et. al. point shit like this out and compare this to raising the marginal rates by 3.6%.

Poindexter718 December 19, 2012 at 2:01 pm

Can't wait to see the Teatards adopt a tights wearing French actor as their new poster boy (or, as they will be compelled to call him, their "garçon d'affiche").

Wile E. Quixote December 19, 2012 at 2:02 pm

The great thing about moving to Belgium is that when the Krauts go one one of their periodic rampages and get all invady and shit you don't have to wait as long for the Panzers to start rolling through your country.

HistoriCat December 20, 2012 at 12:38 pm

That is sooo 20th century. These days they just loan-shark the money and then set up puppet governments. Sure, it's not as exciting as machine gunning peasants but you get a much different response from the British.

Kitty_Sanchez December 19, 2012 at 2:03 pm

He looks familiar. Wait…is this the guy who plays Shrek?

elviouslyqueer December 19, 2012 at 2:09 pm

Mange de la merde, Gerard! Va te faire foutre, aussi.

PinkoMoonbat December 19, 2012 at 5:24 pm

It has been suggested that he should do exactly that. Also that if you leave the country for tax avoidance purposes you never ever get to change your mind and come back.

TribecaMike December 19, 2012 at 2:10 pm

Why would a vineyard owner move to beer country? Je suis confus.

Chet Kincaid_ December 19, 2012 at 2:19 pm

So what? All the rock stars everybody loves fled England in the '70s over taxes too. And don't get George Harrison started.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tax_exile#Famous_tax

TribecaMike December 19, 2012 at 2:22 pm
Chet Kincaid_ December 19, 2012 at 2:58 pm

My God, Keith actually looked like a human being once?! Next you'll be telling me Gollum was once a hobbit named Smeagol.

seppdecker December 19, 2012 at 2:25 pm

Jerry Lewis may be big in France, but Gerard Depardieu is hippopotamic in any country.

Monsieur_Grumpe December 19, 2012 at 2:49 pm

Stupid Frog. Yes, I'm qualified to say that.

Beowoof December 19, 2012 at 2:51 pm

Oh if I had to choose it would be Cecile deFrance from Hearafter. Cecile, call me.

BoroPrimorac December 19, 2012 at 3:14 pm

However the minister of culture, Aurelie Filippetti, joined her Socialist colleagues who criticised the actor's decision on Sunday. She said he was "deserting the field in the middle of a war against the [economic] crisis," and that "French citizenship is an honour, and includes rights and also duties, which include the ability to pay taxes."

This right here, Progressives.

TribecaMike December 19, 2012 at 3:18 pm

No homme is an island, though some are as large as an island.

Dashboard Buddha December 19, 2012 at 3:29 pm

Fucker has a lot of Gaul.

Rebootably_Joe December 19, 2012 at 3:32 pm

I'm going to be Franc, I think he's in Seine

Dashboard Buddha December 19, 2012 at 3:40 pm

I wish he and France could just make Amiens.

Negropolis December 20, 2012 at 2:01 am

France doesn't have much Toulouse in all of this. They should kick him in the Nice; that'll bring him down to size.

TribecaMike December 19, 2012 at 3:53 pm

Languedoc? I hardly know her!

TavariousChinaSmith December 19, 2012 at 4:37 pm

Is there still room in Belgium for Mitt Romney?

Smitros December 19, 2012 at 4:55 pm

"L'avare, c'est Moi."

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