THIS WAY TO THE OVENS  2:10 pm December 18, 2012

Plucky Girl Convinces Hasbro To Market Easy Bake Oven To Boys, Maybe Destroys American Manhood

by Doktor Zoom


You may have heard about this when it popped up a few weeks back: 13 year old McKenna Pope of Garfield, New Jersey, started a petition on Change.org calling on Hasbro to change its marketing for the Easy Bake Oven to make the product appealing to both boys and girls. She also made the video above, in which she explains her campaign was motivated by her 4-year-old brother saying he’d like to make half-baked dough messes, but that since Easy Bake is really “for girls,” no maybe not. In a development that surprised absolutely no one, the story immediately became fodder for culture warfare, with progressives nodding approvingly at the young activist and conservatives either bemoaning the story as part of the war on masculinity or huffing that everyone knows that all great chefs are MEN anyway.

So now, Hasbro has announced that it will indeed be introducing a redesigned Easy Bake Oven next summer, with packaging and advertising that features both girls and boys. Hasbro invited McKenna and her family to their Pawtucket, Rhode Island, headquarters to see the new silver and black toy and meet with the toy’s marketing team. Yay!

Of course, the new oven “has been in development for 18 months,” so what this really means is that Hasbro was making changes to the product already, and used this story as an opportunity to make it appear that they were responding to McKenna’s petition. And maybe it’s a bit of both; no word on whether the gender-inclusive marketing for the new version was already in the works, or if the company is now going to push it a bit more aggressively in response to the petition. Given that the petition only surfaced at the end of November, the former seems more likely, but still, good on Hasbro for some nimble public relations.

In the meantime, reactions among wingnuts have been pretty much what you’d expect; comments on the Blaze have been about equally divided between “Oh, that’s nice” and somewhat more alarmed views:

  • Cooking time is one thing,gearing girly item towards boys is another. I would never get my son an easy bake oven and I have to admit I’ld look at him a little different if he asked for one…If he grows up to be a chef I’ll be proud but playing easy bake oven is one step from barbies.
  • his big sister will be the next Democrat, Sandra Fluke spouting off about her needs, her desires as if she thinks anyone cares.
  • Someone still doesn’t understand boys are boys and girls are girls…. Except where parents indoctrinate their kids even as infants
  • HAS[BRO] needs to change it’s name to HAS[BI]
  • This gal I’m quite sure got her impetus from her feminist mom and feminized dad to bring “equality” to children’s gender. Equality means remove/discourage male tendencies and compromise toward feminine tendencies.
  • Anyone remember the Scripture that says it would be better to be thrown into a lake with a millstone tied around your neck than to lead a child astray? I also include the child who has been USED to get this agenda passed. BARF!

And we’ll give the last word to a theorist at Jonah Goldberg’s mom’s website, which probably will help some of you fill in a space on your Wingnut Bingo cards:

  • Rush had an excellent caller today talking about how all of the mass shootings have in common being done by young white males from well off families. Then she pointed to how today´s society is suppressing basic male instincts and how it is affecting young males of today, in other words “chickifying” our young males.
    This unisex Easy Bake Oven is just another example.


Hey, you know what OTHER Hasbro product primarily aimed at girls also has a surprising following among males?

[YouTube / NY DailyNews / TheBlaze]

Check out Wonkette on Facebook and Twitter and even on Tumblr. And if you have a bee in your bonnet or a bun in your Easy Bake Oven, Doktor Zoom is on Twitter, also, too.

 
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{ 168 comments }

OzoneTom December 18, 2012 at 2:12 pm

After all that little boy could grow up to be the next Julia Child.

On the other hand he could grow up to be the next Guy Fieri.

hagajim December 18, 2012 at 2:17 pm

Good lord, who wants that hairdo. Fieri's not Julia Childs…oh, wait. How about neither.

hagajim December 18, 2012 at 2:17 pm

Good lord, who wants that hairdo. Fieri's not Julia Childs'…oh, wait. How about neither.

Lizzietish81 December 18, 2012 at 2:18 pm

Julia Child was bad ass.

starfanglednut December 18, 2012 at 6:09 pm

She was awesome . I totally love her.

snowpointsecret December 18, 2012 at 2:20 pm

I figure I'm in the minority about Guy Fieri here? I mean, I'm with you that Julia Child is better, but he's not exactly lacking in skill or anything.

SorosBot December 18, 2012 at 2:26 pm

Isn't he that obnoxious douche with the bleached spiky hair from the TGI Friday's commercials? Have no idea if he's a good cook, but he's so annoying that it kind of overrides any skill.

miss_grundy December 18, 2012 at 2:41 pm

I would rather have him grow up to be another Jacques Pepin or Ming Tsai.

Caradeloca December 18, 2012 at 2:51 pm

Marcus Samuelson

gullywompr December 18, 2012 at 2:13 pm

Argh! My dick! My beautiful dick! You Maniacs! You blew it up! Ah, damn you! God damn you all to hell!

Dudleydidwrong December 18, 2012 at 2:25 pm

"I'm melting, I'm melting….now it looks like a vagina….hey, that's sort of attractive…Keep going, keep going!"

Swampgas_Man December 18, 2012 at 9:19 pm

Getting mine blown is nice, whether up or down.

orygoon December 18, 2012 at 2:13 pm

My lads didn't mind pink, as long as there was a healthy helping of dinosaurs somewhere.

CommieLibunatic December 18, 2012 at 3:35 pm

And only a fundamentalist would hate something as unarguably awesome as dinosaurs.

Dinosaurs and dough foundries? WOOP WOOP WOOP FUN POLICE COMIN' THROUGH

Lascauxcaveman December 18, 2012 at 2:14 pm

My sister had an Easy-Bake oven when I was a kid; we made cupcakes. They were shite.

So we had mom show us how to use the real oven. Now, that was easy.

Lizzietish81 December 18, 2012 at 2:14 pm

Weird, my sister played with Barbies and monster trucks and yet is more feminine than I am, even though I had more Barbies and also My Little Pony.

petforest December 18, 2012 at 2:14 pm

Silver and black? Does it also come with a gun? Or just Oakland Raiders crossed swords. (to cut the cake, of course!)

Lizzietish81 December 18, 2012 at 2:16 pm

Maybe its a robot in disguise.

bikerlaureate December 18, 2012 at 2:53 pm

A frosting gun would be tuff.

Lizzietish81 December 18, 2012 at 2:15 pm

You shouldn't have put it in the oven.

Botlrokit December 18, 2012 at 2:16 pm

Get in the Tonka truck, bitch!

miss_grundy December 18, 2012 at 2:43 pm

I thought Hasbro was going to put out a line of trucks for girls. Did I read this somewhere or am I just imagining it?????

gullywompr December 18, 2012 at 2:16 pm

Ix-nay on the ony-pays…

Doktor Zoom December 18, 2012 at 2:27 pm

Did someone say ponies????

snowpointsecret December 18, 2012 at 2:16 pm

Cooking time is one thing,gearing girly item towards boys is another. I would never get my son an easy bake oven and I have to admit I’ld look at him a little different if he asked for one…If he grows up to be a chef I’ll be proud but playing easy bake oven is one step from barbies.

Boys have been playing with dolls for years. They call them action figures. This is new how, exactly?

docterry6973 December 18, 2012 at 3:06 pm

Yeah, and the world has gone to hell since the first day that boys started playing with them. They need to play like MEN!

hagajim December 18, 2012 at 2:17 pm

Today we are all Alton Brown.

Barbara_ December 18, 2012 at 2:17 pm

They should make little Weber grills for boys. Grilling is SO much different than baking because you do it outside where you can stop and go pee on a tree and be manly. Then they will know the right thing to do with their wieners and everyone will be happy and heterosexual.

Oblios_Cap December 18, 2012 at 2:23 pm

Plus it takes longer to BBQ, so you can get all likkered up and listen to rock-n-roll.

At least that's what I do. It's great to have a covered porch w/ ceiling fans.

Barbara_ December 18, 2012 at 2:36 pm

It took me two days to assemble Grillzilla. I remember Jeff coming home and cracking open a beer and hugging me like I just won the Superbowl.

Oblios_Cap December 18, 2012 at 2:45 pm

I fell in love with you just from hearing that heartwarming story.

prommie December 18, 2012 at 3:04 pm

Peeing in your yard is a very important thing.

bobbert December 19, 2012 at 2:49 am

Keeps the deer away. Maybe.

Mandorlin December 18, 2012 at 5:48 pm

And they can set their back yards on fire…because fire extinguishers are for wusses.

Oblios_Cap December 18, 2012 at 2:18 pm

Anyone remember the Scripture that says it would be better to be thrown into a lake with a millstone tied around your neck than to lead a child astray?

No.

I'm glad the jerkoffs didn't let the shootings come between them and their daily outrage.

Blueb4sinrise December 18, 2012 at 2:18 pm

Can it be used to make teh krystel meths?

chicken_thief December 18, 2012 at 2:57 pm

The pot brownies are awesome. Or so I've been told….

chascates December 18, 2012 at 2:18 pm

What a commie trick! Little boys can't play cowboy and injuns or kill the Nazis with a toy oven, they need realistic looking play assault rifles to get them prepared to buy the real article as adults.

The NRA is one of the biggest marketing teams in the world.

hagajim December 18, 2012 at 2:19 pm

Can we have an Iron Chef where the secret ingredient is an Ezy Bake Oven? I'd love to see Bobby Flay make some of his shit in that.

OneYieldRegular December 18, 2012 at 2:37 pm

The winner will make a salad.

LibrarianX December 18, 2012 at 2:45 pm

Bobby Flay would still rely on his staff in an Easy Bake Oven Throw-down.

MonkeyMotion December 18, 2012 at 2:19 pm

No doubt all those shooter dudes spent hours in the kitchen baking…

Lascauxcaveman December 18, 2012 at 2:19 pm

Hasbro is really missing out on a the better marketing opportunity: Easy-BBQ-Pit.

Accessories (sold separately) include charcoal briquets, a set of butcher knives, and a .30-06 to shoot your wild venison.

SayItWithWookies December 18, 2012 at 2:19 pm

That's the Real American Male for ya — completely unafraid of a hypothetical heavily armed maniac, yet terrified that a child's oven with a lightbulb in it will cause him to start sucking cock.

flipdraw December 18, 2012 at 2:43 pm

I have no Easy Bake oven in my past to explain away that tendency of mine.

chascates December 18, 2012 at 6:54 pm

And as Sam Kinson quoted the bible "suck dick, lose the kingdom".

chascates December 18, 2012 at 2:20 pm

Also needs moar ponification, doc.

Doktor Zoom December 18, 2012 at 2:24 pm

Oh, there's a pony in there. You just have to look for it.

You know, like the old story about the little kid with a pile of horseshit…

SorosBot December 18, 2012 at 2:20 pm

Playing with girls' toys gives you cooties.

MissTaken December 18, 2012 at 2:22 pm

Depends on the toy ;)

SorosBot December 18, 2012 at 2:29 pm

Why, I am a fine upstanding chaste man and have no idea what you may be implying you dirty young lady.

Jus_Wonderin December 18, 2012 at 2:50 pm

I saw a Semi the other day and in the dust on the back was written "I wish my wife was this dirty".

bikerlaureate December 18, 2012 at 2:55 pm

Hooray for subtext, and the improvement of the Wonkette experience thereby.

chicken_thief December 18, 2012 at 2:59 pm

Does she need a spanking?! I mean, I'm sure she needs a spanking!!!

StarsUponThars December 18, 2012 at 2:21 pm
coolhandnuke December 18, 2012 at 2:21 pm

Blame Obama and his Eco-Warrior, Global Warming is "real" position on Easy Bake Ovens with their wasteful incandescent light bulbs that are turning kids away from God and into Hells Kitchen.

MissTaken December 18, 2012 at 2:21 pm

You know who else made ovens for little boys and girls?

Ugh, sorry.

snowpointsecret December 18, 2012 at 2:22 pm

A witch in a gingerbread house?

SorosBot December 18, 2012 at 2:24 pm

Pennywise the clown?

SorosBot December 18, 2012 at 2:42 pm

Or, the Carthaginians*?

*(Subject to scholarly dispute whether true or Roman propaganda)

miss_grundy December 18, 2012 at 2:50 pm

Oh, what the heck….Hitler????

chicken_thief December 18, 2012 at 3:00 pm

Jesus fucking Christ?

StillGoinGreen December 18, 2012 at 3:26 pm

No, who?

HouseOfTheBlueLights December 18, 2012 at 3:49 pm

I laughed. I'm not proud of it.

HistoriCat December 19, 2012 at 10:02 am

Too soon?

swordfis December 19, 2012 at 4:00 pm

I was going to remark that if the above wingnuts were reminded that you can kill Jews in ovens they might be more ok with it.

SoBeach December 18, 2012 at 2:21 pm

I would never get my son an easy bake oven and I have to admit I’ld look at him a little different if he asked for one…

I'm afraid for a child I don't even know…

owhatever December 18, 2012 at 2:21 pm

Easy Bake ovens don't bake cookies. People bake cookies. The Blaze just makes kooks.

SorosBot December 18, 2012 at 2:21 pm

No, action figures are not dolls! For one thing, dolls are generally bigger and have clothes you can change.

miss_grundy December 18, 2012 at 2:44 pm

But G.I. Joe came with accessories that you could put on him, like guns and cartridge rounds….so, he's a DOLL.

elviouslyqueer December 18, 2012 at 2:21 pm

Meh. I won't get too worked up about this so long as somebody gets in the kitchen and fixes me a damn sammich.

miss_grundy December 18, 2012 at 2:54 pm

At this point, a feminist would ask if you lacked arms or legs—or a very angry Cuban female, except she would yell at you in Spanish: Oyeme, eres manco? No puedes caminar?

Naked_Bunny December 18, 2012 at 5:36 pm

Look at that photo. He's just a head and shoulders. A hungry head and shoulders. Jeez, so insensitive.

RadioBitchFace December 18, 2012 at 2:22 pm

You know who else redesigned ovens?

kyeshinka December 18, 2012 at 2:28 pm

Some German firm with a cushy contract in Auschwitz?

Lizzietish81 December 18, 2012 at 2:35 pm

The Witch in the Gingerbread House?

Mumbletypeg December 18, 2012 at 2:39 pm

The microwave inventor?

Mumbletypeg December 18, 2012 at 2:46 pm

All this talk of repurposing ovens makes me radiant, Radio~

SayItWithWookies December 18, 2012 at 2:52 pm

Jack Donnehy?

chicken_thief December 18, 2012 at 3:01 pm

Ronco?

HRH_Maddie December 18, 2012 at 2:22 pm

I'm so glad that this younger generation is way less shitty than their parents.

SorosBot December 18, 2012 at 2:22 pm

"Rush had an excellent caller today"

That's not possible.

AlterNewt December 18, 2012 at 2:23 pm

On the other hand, literally millions of households did not purchase an Easy-Bake Oven at all.

God Bless America.

Dr_Zoidberg December 18, 2012 at 2:23 pm

Just when I think I can't hate people more, another day comes along with more idiots.

CommieLibunatic December 18, 2012 at 3:49 pm

It's like a game of Whack-A-Mole. You hit one idiot with your Vote Hammer, but three more just pop up.

mavenmaven December 18, 2012 at 2:24 pm

It will prepare kids for their real future frying burgers at McDonalds on Christmas.

Alacrity_Fitz December 18, 2012 at 2:24 pm

Will it be bullet proof?

Texan_Bulldog December 18, 2012 at 2:24 pm

Little McKenna–just another femi-nazi slut in the making. Poor Rush…who will stand up for men like him?

southernboyman December 18, 2012 at 2:25 pm

Will it cook my sister's kitten?

chicken_thief December 18, 2012 at 3:04 pm

The gas version handles the Jewish cats, piece o' cake!

docterry6973 December 18, 2012 at 3:08 pm

No, but the microwave will.

Goonemeritus December 18, 2012 at 2:25 pm

If you watched the movie “Moonstruck” you would know that men have baked for a while. Even if they are tormented as they do it.

kyeshinka December 18, 2012 at 2:25 pm

Thank God Fox News now has something to talk about without feeling awkward.

invisichad December 18, 2012 at 2:26 pm

Won't some compassionate adult give this boy a toy gun instead?

kittensdontlie December 18, 2012 at 2:38 pm

With an extended clip and a bayonet if possible.

bikerlaureate December 18, 2012 at 2:56 pm

Toy?

AlterNewt December 18, 2012 at 2:27 pm

I'm going to have to set the bar a little higher for people I'm supposed to be mad at. I'm pretty much over capacity for this year.

Botlrokit December 18, 2012 at 2:28 pm

Then [Rush's erudite caller] pointed to how today´s society is suppressing basic male instincts and how it is affecting young males of today, in other words “chickifying” our young males.

Yes, the shooter did something incredibly feminine.

SmutBoffin December 18, 2012 at 2:29 pm

I don't care about the oven/gender norms/whatever.

DID HE GET THE DINOSAUR? THOSE TYRANNOSAURUSES ARE SOME SERIOUSLY COOL SHIT

snowpointsecret December 18, 2012 at 2:30 pm

Idea: Easy-bake oven in the shape of a dinosaur. Give the kid what he wants!

SmutBoffin December 18, 2012 at 2:34 pm

Dang. YOU WILL BE RICH, RICH AS A ROMNEY.

Biff December 18, 2012 at 2:31 pm

Miche1e Bachmannnnn weeps for the loss of the incandescent bulb required to make this oven functional…

JustPixelz December 18, 2012 at 2:42 pm

I wondered about that too. Not that I know how an EasyBake oven heats things. I mean, maybe it's a light bulb. Who knows? Let's ask Giada.

shelwood46 December 18, 2012 at 5:04 pm

The new one has an actual heating element instead of a bulb. When I went to look this up, I couldn't help noticing that while ToysRUs has this on their website as "cooking game", Hasbro itself has it specifically listed as "Girls' Toy" still today.

Dudleydidwrong December 18, 2012 at 2:31 pm

"Anyone remember the Scripture that says it would be better to be thrown into a lake with a millstone tied around your neck than to lead a child astray? I also include the child who has been USED to get this agenda passed. BARF!"

Just shows that given an infinite number of monkeys throwing poo one of them will stop long enough to look up his or her favorite bibble versz and hurl that, too.

widestanceromance December 18, 2012 at 2:33 pm

Maybe they could put it on monster truck wheels and make it bake bullets for boys.

FakaktaSouth December 18, 2012 at 2:34 pm

Here's a thing I think I know – in the actual make money to cook world, it's still a mostly sexist work environment and guys are the big dicks in charge and girls are still fighting to be equals, am I wrong? So, this is stupid. Also, I will say again, I do not know how the big oven in this new kitchen where I am now works still, the fucking genius here does all of that shit and I am grateful everyday.

Spider-Jerk December 19, 2012 at 12:04 am

Ah, but they're talking about the "learn how to cook for yourself so you don't have to live on frozen waffles, instant macaroni, and microwave burritos until you can get yourself a live-in woman"-world of cooking. And every wingnut knows, if little boys grow up knowing how to feed themselves they won't need a girlfriend to play Mommy 2.0 for them, and might just end up gay and sick to death of their parents' sexist, homophobic bullshit.

Chichikovovich December 18, 2012 at 2:35 pm

If the Easy Bake Oven were to come with little pouches of Sudafed, a vial of battery acid, some stripped-open lithium batteries and a couple of jars with plastic tubes running into them, it would be easier to market as preparing boys and girls alike for a productive life.

metamarcisf December 18, 2012 at 3:04 pm

Not to mention 10,000 gallons of methylene.

Chichikovovich December 18, 2012 at 7:23 pm

Any smart kid nowadays will know where to find that

bobbert December 19, 2012 at 2:55 am

And here I was briefly looking at one of those beer-makin' kits earlier today.

Jus_Wonderin December 18, 2012 at 2:38 pm

Easy Bake Camoflauge Version?

Biff December 18, 2012 at 2:40 pm

I requested one a couple of posts ago. Still waiting!

Jus_Wonderin December 18, 2012 at 2:45 pm

Dang. I just posted and didn't actually read up the line. Dang me. Dang me.

SmutBoffin December 18, 2012 at 2:49 pm

…with night-vision goggles and kung-fu grip!

BigSkullF*ckingDog December 18, 2012 at 2:39 pm

Bronies caused 9/11! It's all there. Can't you see the connection??

Wilcoxyz December 18, 2012 at 2:39 pm

Well, you get some boy an Easy Bake Oven and he invites his friend over to make macaroons and then what do you have? Starter gay marriage is what.

ProgressiveInga December 18, 2012 at 2:40 pm

Inga has never been called "plucky". I think I'd punch someone in the nerts if he called me that. Just sayin'.

PopeEdgardo December 18, 2012 at 4:07 pm

Wow! Punch somebody in the nerts. You sure sound like a spunky little gal.

jolpaj December 18, 2012 at 2:42 pm

"his big sister will be the next Democrat, Sandra Fluke spouting off about her needs, her desires as if she thinks anyone cares."

We can infer: 1) no one will become a Democrat before this little girl does, since she will be the next one, 2) Sandra Fluke is empathetic, because by spouting off about the needs of her friend with cancer, she was really spouting off about her own needs, 3) the desire to satisfy the needs and desires of one's siblings (like the little girl did for her little brother) is in fact a short road to seeking to satisfy your own, 4) it is shameful to satisfy your needs and desires, or those of anyone else 5) Sandra Fluke didn't believe that anyone cared about her, she just acted as if she thought so, and 6) nobody actually cared about Sandra Fluke, which is why she had a speaking role at the national convention of a major national party.

I learned a lot today.

PopeEdgardo December 18, 2012 at 2:43 pm

When I was in the 6th grade I joined 4-H cooking club and it turned me into a flaming homo. Luckily, I was sent to a de-homification camp and subjected to thousands of hours of manly type stuff like getting naked in the woods with older men and punching effigies of my mother until I started liking boobs and buns (girl buns! – only girl buns!) like a real man. True story.

LibrarianX December 18, 2012 at 2:43 pm

Is this early training for a job at McDonalds?

OneYieldRegular December 18, 2012 at 2:44 pm

One Christmas my sister received an Easy Bake Oven and I received a GI Joe doll. Much to our parents' dismay we immediately went for one another's toys. They finally gave up trying to get us to exchange them when a full month later my sister was still playing war and I was still happily churning out and decorating miniature pound cakes.

Blueb4sinrise December 18, 2012 at 2:45 pm

Am gonna try to put the dentata on a photo of easy bake oven door

sewollef December 18, 2012 at 2:46 pm

OT: Today's Tuesday, so it must be time for another multiple killing, right?

Right. Today's lucky state is Colorado, and the body count is mercifully 'only' four, according to CNN.

sewollef December 18, 2012 at 2:53 pm

My apologies. I forgot about Kansas.

Who could forget Kansas? Apparently there were three dead in a Kansas grocery store on Sunday night, two of them cops.

MiniMencken December 18, 2012 at 2:46 pm

Gosh, playing with my little sister's Barbie taught me that underneath those svelte clothes, ladies have really interesting parts – ones that I still enjoy playing with when invited to by a big girl who, perhaps, has been served several of my signature cocktails that I learned to make while playing with my chemistry set.

BigSkullF*ckingDog December 18, 2012 at 3:04 pm

"a big girl who, perhaps, has been served several of my signature cocktails that I learned to make while playing with my chemistry set."

Rapey!

MiniMencken December 18, 2012 at 11:37 pm

The operant verb here is "invited," you dog.

BigSkullF*ckingDog December 18, 2012 at 2:47 pm

When I was his age I wanted nothing more than to play with my brothers star wars action figures. And instead I got my little pony and Barbie. That worked out well, didn't it mom?

flipdraw December 18, 2012 at 2:48 pm

Gotta affirm teh ponyz – thanks to my Wonkette, I'm now hooked.

Antispandex December 18, 2012 at 2:48 pm

"….but playing easy bake oven is one step from barbie."

Well, I don't know, in 8th grade my girl friend and I made a Barbie / G.I. Joe porno, and we turned out all right.

Jus_Wonderin December 18, 2012 at 3:02 pm

Did the flick have sound, because all that plastic squeaking must have been distracting.

Antispandex December 18, 2012 at 3:16 pm

No, a silent film classic, shot on her parent's camera in super 8, and developed by a hippie we could trust not to rat us out. After a one time screening for a group of weeded out pals, I believe the hippie kept it. At least, I never saw it again….(sigh).

Mandorlin December 18, 2012 at 5:51 pm

Well, GI Joe could just put Barbie in the Easy Bake Oven until she shuts up and agrees to make him a sammich. That would probably be OK, too.

DahBoner December 18, 2012 at 2:50 pm

I think Hasbro is just toying around with this idea…

SexySmurf December 18, 2012 at 2:51 pm

you know what OTHER Hasbro product primarily aimed at girls also has a surprising following among males?

Tickle Me Hitler?

Allmighty_Manos December 18, 2012 at 2:51 pm

Even some of the posters on the Blaze aren't buying this.

Mumbletypeg December 18, 2012 at 2:51 pm

No snark. This McKenna kid. If she got this far with the common sense she was endowed with, and an additional measure her parents raised her with, here's hoping it provides her with the armor she needs to wise up to or flat-out ignore the blithering ignorati who reel and writhe at the mere suggestion a young tyke is thinking for herself.

prommie December 18, 2012 at 2:53 pm

I live to cook. I am the best chef you all know, you just don't know it. I cook every fucking meal in my house, I shop every day for fresh ingredients, I never make the same thing twice or follow a recipe, I create art that is destroyed in its appreciation, I make art that it is an act of love to share. I cook based on what looks fresh and whats a bargain in the store. And I am so fucking manly, man, you have no idea. I have the biggest, giantest, throbbing, purple-veined, rock-hard cooking organ in the world! So the thing is, I have no problem with the pink EZ-Bake oven anyway.

chicken_thief December 18, 2012 at 3:08 pm

Senator Inouye could kick yer ass in a cooking competition with one arm tied behind his back!!!!

prommie December 18, 2012 at 3:26 pm

Don't come at me when I am cooking; its a dumber thing than charging at a machine-gun nest! And DO NOT grab at my stuff before its fucking ready, either, or suffer the wrath.

imissopus December 18, 2012 at 2:54 pm

I think I'd much rather Adam Lanza's mom had let her kid play with an Easy Bake oven instead of taking him to the gun range.

chicken_thief December 18, 2012 at 3:09 pm

She should have spent more money on targets and less on guns.

Jus_Wonderin December 18, 2012 at 2:55 pm

Mom and Dad loved me so much they gave me the Easy Light Propane Tank and a box of those long fireplace matches. I think I actually heard them, in hushed tones, say "Well he surely can't fuck this up, but what is plan B?"

The next week, we took a lovely drive to the country. I was certain the 15 mile walk back was them thinking about my exercise and health.

editor December 18, 2012 at 2:56 pm

oh no! everyone knows that childhood toy preference is inextricably and causally linked to adult sexual orientation! take away your sons' ovens, and you too can do your part to prevent the gay.

also, why is it that when a boy like to play kitchen people immediately go, well, he could grow up to be a chef, but they rarely say the same about girls?

another also: i have the 1973 easy bake oven. in a butt-ugly, but gender-neutral orange and brown. gotta go and wait hours for one tiny cupcake now!

Blunderthing December 18, 2012 at 3:04 pm

Ah whattabuncha pussies. Real boys cooked tiny hamburgers in their Vac-U-Forms like I did.

CommieLibunatic December 18, 2012 at 3:04 pm

That's nice, but when can I expect the grown up version, the Easy Bake Foundry? Light bulb-powered blast furnace!

BoroPrimorac December 18, 2012 at 3:08 pm

This is what one concerned parent said:

"Let’s do something crazy… If you’re a boy and want to bake, learn how to do it over an open fire. Great survivor skill and will still yield great food."

Lizzietish81 December 18, 2012 at 3:14 pm

Actually I go camping with a woman who can make a cake using a dutch oven on an open fire.

She also made bread with fruit filling, venison stew and a myriad of other awesome stuff.

BoroPrimorac December 18, 2012 at 3:21 pm

I bet she learned a thing or two on the EZ bake oven before she was let loose in front of an open fire, am I right?

chicken_thief December 18, 2012 at 3:11 pm

Does it come with a strap on "baby bump" pillow so they can be barefoot and preggers in the kitchen?

ggaston1960 December 18, 2012 at 3:13 pm

Real men bake.

StillGoinGreen December 18, 2012 at 3:28 pm

Change.org. Baking up little fags, one dinosaur hunter at a time!

sundaytrucker December 18, 2012 at 3:36 pm

Fifteen minutes after he unwraps it, he can put it in the basement to collect dust right next to his sister's pink one. Has an ez-bake oven ever been used twice?

HouseOfTheBlueLights December 18, 2012 at 3:47 pm

Me (radical feminazi) and my feminzied husband tried really hard to turn our precious boy on to dolls when he was a baby and a toddler. He promptly turned them all into guns or trucks. My daughter, on the other hand, turned all his trucks into ponies and babies. They both turned out fine (they both turned out awesome).

However, I am really confused.

Wile E. Quixote December 18, 2012 at 4:05 pm

When I was in 9th grade I got stuck taking gourmet cooking as an elective because it was the only class available at that time. At first I thought that this sucked, but then I realized that I was one of two boys in a class full of girls, and that half of the girls were cheerleaders. Oh, and I also learned how to cook too.

Mandorlin December 18, 2012 at 5:53 pm

I have always loved the "You're so gay–you hang out with girls all the time!" mind set. I keep waiting for the light bulb, but it never comes on.

Kind of like an Easy Bake Oven, now that I think about it….

ChrisM2011 December 18, 2012 at 4:10 pm

All they're going to do is melt their G.I. Joes….

Naked_Bunny December 18, 2012 at 5:32 pm

I lost my penis in an Easy-Bake oven.

Hasbro is getting sooooo sued by whoever finds it.

Thedongsofwar December 18, 2012 at 5:55 pm

I'm sure that little boy will love his Easy Bake Oven but if he is anything like I was then eventually, his plastic dino is getting nuked.

bravo_sierra December 18, 2012 at 6:15 pm

I know I should stop at "Rush had an excellent caller today talking…" when trying to divine meaning from this sampling of comments, but really, when has shooting up a school, mall or movie theater and then killing yourself with your giant gun been a "feminized" response to life's little problems? Wouldn't the female response involve chatting it out with your girlfriends over wine? Or baking? How many times I've thought to myself, I'm sure feeling socially isolated and hopeless, I'm going to bake my problems away using this lightbulb as my only heat source!

barto December 18, 2012 at 6:15 pm

In Hasbro's defense I hear the boys version only cooks tater-tots and fish-sticks, and pot pies in a pinch.

Schmegeg December 18, 2012 at 7:52 pm

Will it come with a Bushmaster assault rifle?

Guppy December 18, 2012 at 8:42 pm

Rush had an excellent caller today talking about how all of the mass shootings have in common being done by young white males from well off families.

Well-off families "just happen" to be able to afford large, unsecured arsenals.

Trinket December 19, 2012 at 2:04 am

Cool. When can we expect to see the GI Joe Fashion Fever Shopping Boutique ("I love shopping! You never run out of money!") and Teen Talk GI Joe ("Math class is TOUGH!") on the shelves?

ttommyunger December 19, 2012 at 12:54 pm

The horror, the horror….

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