Job-Creating Californians to Be Beheaded With Taxes

  jerbs

The very rich are different from you and me, they have more stuffDo you hear that, Californians? DO YOU? Because that’s the sound of jobs disappearing from California because our Job Creators will soon have to pay the nation’s highest marginal income taxes. They will pay the same capital gains tax as everyone else and lower property taxes than anyone in the country but still, WON’T SOMEONE THINK OF THE JOB CREATORS?

Thanks to passage of Proposition 30 last month, high-income Californians would pay the nation’s highest marginal income tax rates — nearly 52 percent — if President Barack Obama and Congress fail to make a deal to avoid the so-called “fiscal cliff,” according to a new study.
[...]
Proposition 30 added three percentage points to the marginal state income tax rate for California’s highest-income taxpayers, bringing it to 13.3 percent. That action raised California over other high-tax jurisdictions to a marginal rate of 51.9 percent, slightly higher than New York City’s level. Hawaii was the only other place with a calculated rate above 50 percent.

Millionaires Ethan Anderson and one other guy are already thinking about leaving because they have had ENOUGH. And also, maybe Obama is doing this for revenge says Rush Limbaugh, in a blog post titled “Obama Wants to Tax the Rich For Revenge.” Maybe? MAYBE? Definitely.

[Sac Bee]

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About the author

Kris E. Benson writes about politics for Wonkette and is pursuing a doctorate in philosophy. This will come in handy for when they finally open that philosophy factory in the next town over. @Kris_E_Benson

View all articles by Kris E. Benson

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214 comments

    1. Beowoof

      I did go and look and tried to complete their survey. I guess they didn't like my answers because I kept answer that tax increases would help the economy, that taxes are okay on the wealthy etc, every time I answered, my answers were wiped out and I was told to answer the questions. Seems as if the "survey" may be rigged. I just can't imagine those nice republicans lying their fucking asses off on a stupid survey. Oh wait we are talking about republicans.

      1. Callyson

        the "survey" may be rigged

        That's to make up for our side rigging the election, in their "minds" at least…

  1. SmutBoffin

    Of course it's for REVENGE. Revenge for what, you ask? Well, there's the colonialism and the…the…stuff that Bill Ayers was all like YEAH MANG KA-BOOM and then…oh yeah, there's the time Erick Erickson made fun of him for the teleprompter thing.

    That's it.

    1. Weedlord BonerHitler

      No, wait, there's the inviting all them Knee-growz to the White House so they can rap their hippity hop all over the Founding Fathers' WHITE lawns, man, you forgot THAT. And some of them even stay there, like that Jay Bee or whatever. And deal drugs and stuff.

  2. edgydrifter

    If this keeps up, they may have to resort to lighting their cigars with $50 bills. So declasse.

          1. Negropolis

            Well, unless you're a sphincter. Then, not only do you have an excuse, but it's the law (of nature).

  3. Tundra Grifter

    Of course, state taxes can be deducted from your income when calculating Federal income taxes owed if you itemize. Just like those property taxes and the interest on your home mortgage (up to $1M in a 1st and $100K on a 2nd).

    And there is a huge spread between marginal tax rates and what people actually pay (the Tax Foundation has some dandy tables showing this for Federal income taxes).

    And there are those American corporations that don't pay any Federal income tax at all – roughly half of them each year.

    Other than all that…

    1. sullivanst

      Oh so you mean it's profoundly dishonest to simply add the state rate to the federal rate? Huh! I'd never have expected profound dishonesty from those fighting to restore the trampled rights of the defenseless superrich.

      ETA: let's face it, if you're in the top marginal brackets, it's a stone-cold guarantee you're itemizing; and if you're itemizing, 13.3% state tax plus 39.6% federal income tax on the remaining 86.7% makes a marginal rate of 47.63%. You're not paying FICA on those dollars, but you should add in the 1.45% Medicare tax they apparently forgot about, which gets you to 49.08%.

      So, they're lying liars. Or incompetent idiots. Don't listen, either way.

    2. Guppy

      I should have majored in accounting in school, since theirs are the only jobs really being created right about now.

  4. Lascauxcaveman

    Has anyone else yet complained about those pernicious auto-play video ads now appearing on yr Wonkette?

    They are fucking up my Beach Boys Christmas music.

    I'm in the 47%; I don't deserve to be treated like this!

    %$@#(*!

    1. BoatOfVelociraptors

      Sweet fing tart mcchrist, auto play ads and 47 dns lookups per page view? Are you kidding?

    2. commiegirl99

      I WILL JUST SPEND THE NEXT TEN HOURS TRYING TO DEAL WITH THE AUTOPLAY ADS AND THE DNS LOOKUPS AND RESPONDING TO EVERYONE'S FUCKING COMPLAINTS ABOUT THEM, WHEN THEY OBVIOUSLY ARE NOT INTENTIONAL ON OUR PART, LIKE I HAVE BEEN DOING ALL WEEK.

      THANKS.

        1. Lascauxcaveman

          Yeah, me too. Of course Becky deserves our respect and admiration, but she'll REALLY get it if those @#%^! auto-play video ads go away. I don't even know what a 'DNS lookup' is, however.

          I will continue to click the silent display ads randomly, many times per day.

      1. sullivanst

        On the plus side, at least the ads here haven't freaked out my anti-virus like RawStory's did earlier in the week.

          1. Callyson

            If it helps, I'm not having issues with the autoplay now.

            We still owe you a happy hour…feel free to collect…

      2. gullywompr

        Users never read the fucking manual.

        Would it help to say that I really appreciate the way the site renders on my smartphone now? No snark, it is much appreciated. At the risk of appearing obsequious, I think you've done great things with the site, and as an IT guy I sympathize. I love Wonkette, and by extension: you.

        It's all these damned commenters I can't stand…

      1. commiegirl99

        Or maybe you could do like I've asked in at least 5 threads: if you see an autoplay ad, click through and forward me the URL so I can send it to the ad company and get it blocked.

        1. memzilla

          Erm… isn't there some coding genius who could build an autodetect script for this function, which would intercept an autoplay ad before it got served and autorespond back to the originating company? Someone who, instead of munniez, would work for weed or Wonkette swag or a wonkette jr. byline? Anyone? Anyone? Bueller? Anyone?

          1. Guppy

            Not really. The ads themselves appear in their own little magic boxes, the contents of which are wholly independent of Wonkett. Think of these boxes as tears in the space-time continuum. Wonkett only opens the box itself and tells your computer how to reach through the box and pull the ads through. It's the ad server itself, on the other side of the stargate, that puts the ad into your blindly-groping hand.

            Now, such a script could probably be done on the ad server's end, but screening ads before serving them gets in the way of Ye Olde Profit Motive, and it's cheaper and easier for them to have Wonkett and the commentariat do that work for them, for free.

    3. Callyson

      I complained about this on the union thugs story and got this reply from the Wonkette powers that be:

      Dudes, I know there's a fuckton of ads now, but they are NOT supposed to be autoplay. When you see one, you need to click through it so we can get the URL and fire them.

      Let's get 'em!

    4. MissNancyPriss

      I literally almost threw my crummy old and only laptop against the wall because I couldn't figure out where the fuck the audio was coming from. LODGING COMPLAINT

  5. YouFail4eva

    Ah, the sweet smell of justice in the mornings. These idiots will run off to South Carolina then. But jokes on them. South Carolina sucks even worse than California!

  6. Barbara_

    No need to threaten to secede the union California. Give it a few years and the tectonic plates will take care of this for you.

    1. Guppy

      Unlike certain other states, California only tried the whole secession thing once, from Mexico. And it wasn't about trying to protect a "peculiar institution."

  7. SayItWithWookies

    Jesus fucking Christ — I might get the impression that the rich don't suffer along with the rest of us during recessions, except for the fact that they spend millions of fucking dollars hiring fucking lobbyists who tell us how much it fucking hurts them every single fucking day. It almost makes me regret all the fucking bad decisions I made that caused this economic slump in the first place.

      1. SayItWithWookies

        Well sure — what with my profligate homebuying, my conspicuous consumption, my liar loans, my reckless speculation on Egyptian cotton and how I tried to hide my billions in losses by investing in the Drachma — well, one thing just led to another.

        It was a slippery slope — like how one night a pretty lady at a bar smiles at you, you start up a converstion, and then a week later you find yourself in the hold of a cargo ship in international waters doing Mexican midget-wrestling porn with two gibbons and a capybara in a ring lined with bricks of cocaine. Coulda happened to anyone, really.

        1. Schmannnity

          Do you have both of your kidneys or did you wake up in a bathtub full of ice with a note and an abdominal scar?

          1. Weedlord BonerHitler

            Nah. The only thing that worthless motherfucker ever read in his life was Stalin's defense of the collectivization (and ensuing murdering) of his reign. Pol Pot, not being known for intellectual depth of any sort, decided to apply the same lesson to the hapless natives of his land.

    1. BlueStateLibel

      Pardon me, but speaking as a 1 percenter, these $3,000 Italian high heels HURT. They hurt me everyday. How is a poor trophy wife to manage?!

  8. nounverb911

    Will our Editrix now relocate to Washington State so that she can take advantage of no state income tax and free(ish) pot?

      1. natl_[redacted]_cmdr

        What about Mr. Hutz, Esq.? Oh, I imagine he'd be ok with it as long as he could join in now and then.

        1. emmelemm

          I'm sure Mr. Hutz wouldn't mind being the meat in a Me-Rebecca sandwich.

          However, I was merely enquiring if there was anyone Trix might want to gay-marry.

          1. natl_[redacted]_cmdr

            Well, I didn't mean to imply you were offering your hand.

            Actually, that's exactly what I was implying. Oops!

          2. emmelemm

            Yes. We'll make you our houseboy, like Hank Azaria in The Birdcage. You can wear Speedos and bring us drinks.

          3. Negropolis

            What do you think you are, sweetie? Some kind of human being worthy of dignity? Bwahahahahaha!!! No, you will fan them and bring them fancy drinks and listen to them talk about their day and have sexytime with them only when and where they want it…take me with you!

    1. BigSkullF*ckingDog

      Free-ish? Obviously you didn't notice all the taxes on it. I think regular dealers will stay in business as long as they sell cheaper than the 25+25+25+25% tax.

  9. Troglodeity

    I have to admire the awesome, mind-blowing cynicism of the guy who invented the term "Job Creators" to describe rich fucks. It's even more delightfully cynical than "Death Taxes."

      1. sullivanst

        The guy who perfected the application of the Republican notion that words have no meaning, they serve only as tools to win elections.

          1. Biff

            Trust me, I'm working on it! Got the lady-love/lust thing going already, just gotta find the right house. Got a realtor working on that, the same one I used to sell the place I already had in CA. Wish I hadn't done that…

    1. FeloniousMonk

      Except a California rich person not complaining about not having … oh, shit, that doesn't work, does it? It would be quite becoming of them to shut the fuck up and pay their taxes gladly. Er, your Regularity is like a stream of bat's piss.

  10. WinstonK3

    California has a very progressive tax system, so for folks around the median income taxes are lower here than they are for people in "lower tax" states. But, yes, if you're a jahb creator like Lindsay Lohan you would be taxed less in Texas.

    1. sullivanst

      To be fair, Lindsay Lohan is creating lots of jahbs – for lawyers, judges, bailiffs, court stenographers and soon, corrections officers.

        1. bobbert

          Well, we do use daemons for a lot of the repetitive shit, so…

          Oh, wait, you already meant that, didn't you? Sorry, slow today.

          1. Weedlord BonerHitler

            For a while, some very strange people were making the argument that daemons needed to be renamed because they were somehow causing those who used computers to become tools of Satin or open to possession by Satin, or some such shit. I always say you've got to be really skinny to go with Satin, anyway, so, you know, why bother?

        1. sullivanst

          Oh yeah, I forgot about that. What's the betting his salary will be $1 and they'll manipulate the price of some stock so they can give him a "bonus" of not very much which miraculously realizes a 2,000% capital gain in the first year.

  11. LibertyLover

    I'd say they might get a hand cramp writing such a large check, but then again, they probably have "people" to do that for them.

  12. memzilla

    The funny thing is, if it were the poorz and middlez being asked to pay more in taxes, the 1% would simply tell us that we had to work harder.

    1. WinstonK3

      Have some compassion for the Rich. They are working as hard as they can! Without them what would happen to all the maids, yacht builders, gofers, personal trainers, personal chefs and other hangers-on? We all know it's the poorz who are lazy and need to be beaten more frequently so they can support their betters.

    2. bikerlaureate

      You've been paying attention.

      Having less available munniez does make the poorz work harder.

      Just like it makes the 1% go Galt.

  13. Joshua Norton

    OMG. Who will buy all those multi-million dollar estates? Oh yeah. OTHER rich people. So SUCK. ON. THAT. Ethan Anderson.

    Frankly, we'd be better off if the "rich" people all left and stopped jacking up the property values. I mean, 2.5 mil for a 3 BR "fixer upper" in San Francisco. Gimme a break!

  14. Joshua Norton

    Funny how these conserva-dicks like Rmoney all piss and moan about taxes and "soshalizm", but they flock to the blue states when given a choice where to live.

  15. snowpointsecret

    Currently, I'd settle for them taking jobs away. From the AT&T people who took 4 days what they said would take 4 hours.

  16. Baconzgood

    Mark Baconz words: One day, when FOX and the right wing noise makers think of it, they will change the word "tax" and make it "tribute". Just like how they changed "torture" for "intensive interrigation".

  17. mrblifil

    I'd be happy to let them keep more of their pre-tax income if they would simply agree to pay my cable/internet fees (excluding prøn, though covering that would go a long way as a demonstration of good faith).

  18. Lot_49

    That's it. I'm leaving California, as soon I as I can find another state with 1500 miles of coastline and beaches, two or three great wine-producing regions, snow-capped mountains and hot dry deserts.

    Or to quote Bill Maher: We can drink a Mudslide and a Sex on the Beach during an actual mudslide while having sex on the beach!

      1. Lot_49

        As Maher was saying:

        You know, the rest of America feels about California the way the rest of the world feels about America. They hate us because we do what we want. They think we’re too blessed and too free, and it makes them nuts in the dreary hovels of Kabul and Tikrit and Lubbock, Texas. They pray to their threadbare gods that we’ll get what we deserve. But it won’t happen. Because you never know what we’re going to do here next. We elected Ronald Reagan and Jerry Brown

        1. Negropolis

          in the dreary hovels of Kabul and Tikrit and Lubbock, Texas.

          One of these things is exactly like the other. lol

      1. Lot_49

        Been there; it's a funny place that used to be the biggest seaport on the west coast, but got frozen in time when the Panama Canal opened.Chile is beautiful, though.

  19. Weedlord BonerHitler

    Fuck me, that's still about a third of the rate I pay. Please deitiez don't let me run into these people and hear them blabber this shit right into my face because by god and by gum I will thwack them mightily about the head and balls with my iron hiking stick of retribution.

    What a miserable bunch of whinging fuckers. They didn't mind in the least when the rest of US were picking up the tab.

  20. bibliotequetress

    If the rich people move away from the poor people, will they get all Lord Of The Flies with each other?
    "Donald! When you're done with my laundry, Pigboy, give me a pedicure!"

  21. Slim_Pickins

    What I don't understand is why aren't all Americans already living in the lowest tax states, Alaska, South Dakota, and Tennessee.

  22. FeloniousMonk

    "All the leaves are brown
    And the sky is grey
    I've been for a walk
    On a winter's day
    I'd be safe and warm
    If they'd just take that tax away"

    – The Matrons and the Patriarchs

    1. emmelemm

      I know all the ambition has just been sucked out of me, by the thought that, should I suddenly move up the class ladder, I might have to pay my fair share.

      Guess I'll just lie on the couch and eat my Cheetos, then.

  23. BlueStateLibel

    "This is the end" – California musician Jim Morrison lamenting 1960s marginal income tax increase.

  24. Freewayblogger

    The only "jobs" created by the uber-rich are stupid shit like valet parking and peeling grapes.

    Oh yeah, and prostitution.

    1. gullywompr

      I believe the one you are checking out is Lois Chiles. She was easy on the eyes, still is, actually. As a teenager, I thought Karen Black was the hottest woman in that movie, but now I'm not so sure.

        1. gullywompr

          That, sir, is The Great Gatsby, 1974. Left to right is Bruce Dern, Lois Chiles, Mia Farrow, and Robert Redford. Awesome fucking movie, and one of the greatest stories ever.

          1. glasspusher

            Good thing I have friends like you. I thought that didn't quite look like Paul Newman, but I recognized Momma Mia from a mile away…

          2. glasspusher

            Hah! Lois Chiles was in Moonraker too(Dr. Holly Goodhead…indeed)- a '70s film I saw at the theatre more than once, but I sure don't care to see again. Excuse me while I do some more…research…on her other 70s pictures.

  25. TribecaMike

    Meanwhile, George Deukmejian laughs in your face and spends his sweet mimosa smelling pension checks at the Whiskey A Go Go every single night night digging the Doors and Johnny Otis, suckers.

  26. ttommyunger

    "Job Creators" is just an abbreviation for their full title: "Blowjob Creators". I know this because I overheard a couple of these types discussing the lofty issues of life at a party I had no business attending; it went something like this: "Fucking is for truck drivers, the blowjob is the thing."

  27. gullywompr

    It's a little weird – the home page renders the full site just like a desktop, but once I click into a story, and thereafter, it renders as a mobile app. Much easier to use (and read).

    1. commiegirl99

      That is absolutely BIZARRE. I have never seen a mobile Wonkette app before. I wonder who put it there???

      1. gullywompr

        Never saw it before yesterday, so I was thinking the Varnish cache thing was doing it, but of course I don't really know. My best guess is the software tries to detect if the device is mobile, and render it differently if it is, but it probably only allows a second or so to do it, so a blazingly fast connection is required. My daughter is Skyping right now, so that is probably slowing my connection down – it's not rendering as a mobile app for me at the moment.

      2. gullywompr

        My daughter just finished with Skype, so the bandwidth is freed up, and it's rendering as a mobile app again (I've got my Droid connected to the home network at the moment). So yeah, it seems to be a speed thing.

      3. gullywompr

        Rebecca, I've been able to discover that it is a plugin to WordPress called WPTouch that is doing the mobile device rendering on my phone. I like it, but you should know: no ads are displayed in this mode.

  28. drstrabismus

    I am reminded of the New Yorker cartoon from 1936, depicting, "A caravan of California millionaires, fleeing eastward from the state income tax, encamps for the night in hostile Wisconsin territory."

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