STOP HITTING YOURSELF  10:41 am December 7, 2012

Fox’s Dana Perino Knows How to Reduce Domestic Violence

by Taylor Huffman

In the wake of that football player shooting his  girlfriend and also an entire human history of widespread violence against women,Fox’s Dana Perino has an innovative solution  to end the abuse! Did you know that probably a majority of the time, women who are beaten consciously make a decision to be with the right nut at the right time in the right Applebee’s parking lot?

Given that violence against women occurs at alarming rates all over the world (according to a U.N study that’s way too long but has some slick graphs), it’s about time someone finally figured out an effective way to slow down this malicious universal parasite. For a closer look at how Dana articulates her argument, review this exchange with her Fox Co-Hosts:

PERINO: I think it skirts the issue that women are victims of violence all the time –

CO-HOST: They should have guns!

PERINO: Well, maybe, or make better decisions.

If you listen really carefully you can hear Greg Gutfeld’s erection explode as he exclaims with glee, “They should have guns!” He points out that guns help “even the score” between the weak and the powerful, which totally doesn’t sound like the musings of a disturbed high school shooter or anything – but who cares, Dana has already made her point! It won’t help women to carry guns because everyone should be carrying guns. An abused woman’s attacker will have a gun too. Their 4 year old might barrel roll out of her room and turn the thing into a Mexican shootout. Having a gun is a given, silly Greg Gutfeld.

Women need to make better choices. Since abusive males never masquerade as “totally normal, chill dudes,” women simply need to stop implicating themselves with skull tatted gas station attendants who run meth on the side. Say it with us three times: I choose not to be beat. I choose not to be beat. I choose not to be beat. Problem solved, ladies.

[MediaMatters]

 
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{ 202 comments }

1stNewtontheMoon December 7, 2012 at 10:44 am

Let's see. Two options of the republican mind: Shoot it (guns) or Victim Blaming/Make Better Decisions (personal responsibility). What's the opposite of win-win?

Esteev December 7, 2012 at 10:56 am

Dumb-Dumb?

Fare la Volpe December 7, 2012 at 11:11 am

Fox.

YouFail4eva December 7, 2012 at 11:13 am

Fail-Epic Fail?

CrunchyKnee December 7, 2012 at 11:28 am

Romney/Ryan?

Callyson December 7, 2012 at 1:19 pm

Lose…because stats show that the women who get killed are often the ones who *did* get the fuck out, but who were not adequately protected from their abuser.

Or lose…google "women in prison for killing their abuser" for the depressing details there.

Dana Perino can kiss my ass.

/FFS

ButthurtWingers2012 December 7, 2012 at 6:27 pm

Well to be fair Republicans are always telling other people to take personal responsibility with their lives. When something happens to one of them it's obviously the fault of liberals/unions/the government/gun laws/black people/hispanics/women/gheys/black people/hispanics and finally…tax rates. Essentially they are taking the personal responsibility to make CONSTANT excuses for being losers.

gingerland62 December 7, 2012 at 10:48 am

Why can't murdered women make better decisions? Guns don't kill people. women's bad decision-making kills people!

actor212 December 7, 2012 at 10:49 am

It's her own fault for standing in front of a gun!

widestanceromance December 7, 2012 at 10:55 am

She OWES me for that bullet she stole with her spinal cord!

actor212 December 7, 2012 at 10:56 am

Or she could at least return it!

Fare la Volpe December 7, 2012 at 11:11 am

What a bitch!

Ruhe December 7, 2012 at 11:39 am

The implication would be that rather than gun control what we really need is women control…oh wait…now I see where this is heading.

T3rbo December 7, 2012 at 11:45 am

Sharia law, but the good kind. Jesus is for it, so am I

actor212 December 7, 2012 at 10:49 am

Lock hubby out?

hagajim December 7, 2012 at 10:49 am

Now I know why Dana Perino was W's mouthpiece. Stupid is as stupid does.

Nostrildamus December 7, 2012 at 12:57 pm

She was the most natural presidential press secretary in history because she didn't need to feign ignorance of the subject at hand.

LionHeartSoyDog December 7, 2012 at 1:20 pm

"Smother that girl in chocolate syrup,
and strap her on again."

Why doesn't everyone strap one on?

CommieLibunatic December 7, 2012 at 1:23 pm

What do you expect from the same person who said we didn't have a terror attack on Bush Jr.'s watch? She's a walking Blonde Joke.

Lizzietish81 December 7, 2012 at 10:50 am

Personally I won't feel safe until the Dentata becomes widely available.

Esteev December 7, 2012 at 10:55 am

RAWR!

Jeri 2.0 December 7, 2012 at 10:58 am
Toomush_Infer December 7, 2012 at 11:30 am

The Tooth Mother Naked at Last!……

actor212 December 7, 2012 at 10:50 am

Vapid, senseless, meaningless blonde is vapid, senseless, meaningless.

Esteev December 7, 2012 at 10:54 am

I find her irresistible for some reason. But, if something were to happen between us, I hope she would make the sound decision of putting duct tape over her mouth.

smellypossum December 7, 2012 at 10:57 am

Will be needing pics for confirmation, and fap fuel.

Esteev December 7, 2012 at 10:58 am

Roger that!

fuflans December 7, 2012 at 10:56 am

and looks more like 'fox girl' everyday.

seriously. do they clone them?

YouFail4eva December 7, 2012 at 11:14 am

yup. There's a montage on Youtube that rapidly cycles through all the Fox News Females, and they all look freaking identical.

Mittaplasia December 7, 2012 at 11:16 am

They really do; they're called "clunts".

ManchuCandidate December 7, 2012 at 10:50 am

It's like the Cuban Missile Crisis of 1984 when Ronnie Raygun played the role of the abused housewife who burned Fidelity Castrol alive in his bed with a nukular bomb after Castrol slapped Ronnie Raygun around for loving Freedumb.

HistoriCat December 7, 2012 at 11:13 am
YouFail4eva December 7, 2012 at 11:14 am

Get on this man. I need to see a screen-treatment by the end of the week!

T3rbo December 7, 2012 at 11:46 am

Work in Bonzo the chimp and I'm in. I'm thinking Bonzo can play the role of George HW Bush?

SuspectedDemocrat December 7, 2012 at 12:06 pm

Bonzo has already been cast in the role of Bush Jr.

Joshua Norton December 7, 2012 at 10:51 am

There’s a way Gutfeld could be more pathetic but it’s not coming immediately to mind.

Lionel[redacted]Esq December 7, 2012 at 2:35 pm

He's short, fat and works for FOX. Is there really a way he could be more pathetic?

ttommyunger December 7, 2012 at 10:51 am

Dana, having the I.Q. of a doorknob, assumes all women have the I. Q. of a doorknob. Not so, Dana, not so; wrong again…….stupidly wrong.

Goonemeritus December 7, 2012 at 10:51 am

My wife doesn’t have a gun, yet she still scares the crap out of me.

PubOption December 7, 2012 at 12:18 pm

Here's Hazel O'Connor, with a stare that would have Charles Manson shitting himself .http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XdWoWx0_txc

asterixaverni December 7, 2012 at 10:51 am

It is bad enough when an man pukes out shit like this, but a woman? Moron.

freakishlywrong December 7, 2012 at 10:51 am

No Dana, you could make a better decision and not watchThe Five .

Maman December 7, 2012 at 10:51 am

It isn't the death device or the dude holding it that kills you. It's your bad choices. I told you not to piss me off, bitch.

el_donaldo December 7, 2012 at 10:52 am

Maybe they should just let the guns make those decisions for them. Seems to work for Greg!

Esteev December 7, 2012 at 10:53 am

Dana is bad, but Eric Bolling is the biggest douche on the TeeVee. He knows "millions" of people that have been saved by guns? I think I may buy a gun and teach it CPR, I feel like that would be more useful.

BaldarTFlagass December 7, 2012 at 11:07 am

"You should call that gun Lifesaver!"

Esteev December 7, 2012 at 11:09 am

"It saves lives, and freshens breath!"

Wait…

Lot_49 December 7, 2012 at 11:23 am

He says millions have had their lives saved by guns, but then pulls back and says millions have had their property saved by guns. If they hadn't cut him off he might have gotten to "Owning a big gun is almost as good as having big dick."

Esteev December 7, 2012 at 11:26 am

I wouldn't know. I don't own a gun. *wink/wink nudge/nudge*

T3rbo December 7, 2012 at 11:38 am

He meant to say "Liberated," like in Iraq

gullywompr December 7, 2012 at 10:54 am

Nunneries are pretty safe places to go to….

Esteev December 7, 2012 at 10:57 am
gullywompr December 8, 2012 at 10:12 am

I'd like to subscribe to your newsletter.

freakishlywrong December 7, 2012 at 10:54 am

Wasn't this twunt Dubya's mouthpiece? She would know a bad decision when she sees one, I guess.

mausgeo December 7, 2012 at 10:54 am

Fox's Dana Perino knows how to….hmmm, what could it be?

widestanceromance December 7, 2012 at 11:36 am

The answer is right there in your question: 7th word from the left. . .

mausgeo December 7, 2012 at 1:42 pm

So it was a rhetorical question? …Don't answer that.

smellypossum December 7, 2012 at 10:55 am

Yeah, it's just that simple.

BTW: How's that "Just Say No" thing working out, Ms. Reagan?

Baconzgood December 7, 2012 at 10:55 am

if my girl doesn't want to be beaten she shouldn't do things that provoke me…like blink.

BaldarTFlagass December 7, 2012 at 11:03 am

Or talk.

actor212 December 7, 2012 at 11:08 am

Or breathe my air.

Esteev December 7, 2012 at 11:13 am

Or forget the mayo.

YouFail4eva December 7, 2012 at 11:40 am

Or exist

actor212 December 7, 2012 at 10:56 am

After…

you mean.

Esteev December 7, 2012 at 10:59 am

Before and after. 'Natch.

Lizzietish81 December 7, 2012 at 10:57 am

Yesterday I finally answered my phone and talked to a rep from Amnesty International asking for an extra gift for their work in supporting Violence Against Women acts and mentioned that the US was one of six countries that hadn't passed such a law.

I said I wasn't surprised.

Occasionally on the interwebs you run into a man complaining about how women treat every new man like a potential rapist. But then if we don't, if we show trust in a man and that trust is abused, what happens? Well she made a bad choice.

We keep getting told "don't be a victim" why aren't men being told "don't be a rapist"?

actor212 December 7, 2012 at 11:17 am

Hey now! SOME of us got the hint from our moms when we were first dating!

Or her dad, who was a cop and would clean his gun while I sat in the living room waiting for her to get ready.

Mittens Howell, III December 7, 2012 at 11:38 am

Hang on, so you were dating your mom, and while you were waiting for her to get ready your Grampa sat there cleaning his gun?

This is so fucking weird.

Why weren't you cleaning your gun as well? It was obviously gun cleaning time. DID YOU NOT HAVE A GUN??

YouFail4eva December 7, 2012 at 11:41 am

When logic goes too far. Then again, it is actor, so this makes perfect sense.

actor212 December 7, 2012 at 11:41 am

I did, but that came later ;-)

widestanceromance December 7, 2012 at 11:18 am

War on Men LIBEL!!!!111!

Lot_49 December 7, 2012 at 11:24 am

Men today are just intimidated by that sort of attitude, and that's why society is falling apart. How dare you say men don't have a right to rape any woman they can catch? Don't you understand how religion works?

bikerlaureate December 7, 2012 at 12:26 pm

Men wouldn't be getting hooked up with so many women who end up getting beaten – if the women would simply use their heads, and make better decisions about who they hook up with. Totally up to the wimmins.

When all you have is punching bags, every fist looks like a fist.

EatFrankRich December 7, 2012 at 11:41 am

I've been blogging about this shanda in real life and got the word yesterday that Cantor and Uncle Joe have been trying to hammer out a deal, but Cantor won't sign off on the deal, because he wants to take out a clause that would protect Native women from being brutalized by non-Native men. Cantor is denying that this is the case. Just when I thought that I was inured to Cantor's total lying fuckerdom, he does shit like this that leaves me breathless with anger.

calliecallie December 7, 2012 at 11:43 am

Because some girls just rape so easy, Katie?

WhatTheHolyHeck December 7, 2012 at 2:52 pm

Actually there is actually an anti-date-rape PSA campaign for just that. Unfortunately it's being met with the kind of predictable, defensive frat boy butthurt you'd expect.

"Women rape men, you know! Why isn't this campaign about that too?!??!!1eleventy"

fuflans December 7, 2012 at 10:57 am

Well, maybe, or make better decisions.

speaking as a woman, my better decision is to not watch dana perino.

SayItWithWookies December 7, 2012 at 10:58 am

Shit, I watched that clip last night and honestly, Perino's remark was the least offensive one in it. There was also "Guns don't kill nearly as many people as cars, so are we gonna make cars illegal too?" and "I heard about a guy who killed his wife with a baseball bat — so should baseball bats be illegal?" And when the token liberal asked if anyone knew of someone who saved his own life with a gun, the answer was "that happens all the time!" with no actual specific answer.

That whole exchange was a litany of excuses no parent would put up with from a five-year-old.

Lot_49 December 7, 2012 at 11:26 am

Got to admire your penitent self-flagellation in watching this show.

That guy's the liberal?

SayItWithWookies December 7, 2012 at 11:33 am

Oh, I didn't watch the show — just saw the clip of it on CrooksandLiars. And my self-flagellation is never penitent.

PubOption December 7, 2012 at 12:23 pm

The stand-your-ground types will claim they saved their own lives, at the cost of a different person's life.

BaldarTFlagass December 7, 2012 at 10:59 am

Women should all have disintegrator rays, like Marvin the Martian.

Esteev December 7, 2012 at 11:15 am

That sentence makes my balls hurt.

actor212 December 7, 2012 at 11:43 am

This makes me very very angry, indeed!

FNMA December 7, 2012 at 11:23 am

I thought they already had that. Isn't that the thing that kills rape sperm?

MosesInvests December 7, 2012 at 11:58 am

Where's the kaboom? There was supposed to be an Earth-shattering kaboom!

bikerlaureate December 7, 2012 at 12:27 pm

Aaaaand they'd better perfect asexual reproduction right quick, or else convert those FEMA camps to male harems…

CommieLibunatic December 7, 2012 at 1:30 pm

I'd opt for a Spider Jerusalem-brand bowel disruptor. Looks the same as a ray gun, VERY memorable to its victims, virtually untraceable, and (mostly) non-lethal.

x111e7thst December 7, 2012 at 10:59 am

This does not address the problem of bitches who deserved it.

Lot_49 December 7, 2012 at 11:27 am

The ones wearing short skirts, you mean.

bikerlaureate December 7, 2012 at 12:28 pm

There is no solution. They keep being stupid. Naturally, fists are gonna fly.

Swampgas_Man December 7, 2012 at 2:31 pm

BITCH HUNTER! Tuesdays at 9 on Fox!

Mumbletypeg December 7, 2012 at 11:00 am

women who are beaten consciously make a decision to be with the right nut at the right time in the right Applebee’s parking lot?

But but but if you're a tenured schoolteacher/ coach with a restraining order in place as local law provides, then surely you're at least safe from violent abusive ex's while you're on school grounds??
Oh, wait

mavenmaven December 7, 2012 at 11:01 am

I'm not surprised by their regressive views on women, etc, that's old news. I'm surprised that they ran a story about Dave Brubeck, beautiful human being, liberal, who popularized "that black music" on the main screen.

1stNewtontheMoon December 7, 2012 at 11:11 am

Yes, but they had to explain in their crawl who this "Dave Brubeck" person was to an audience who had never heard of him.

BaldarTFlagass December 7, 2012 at 11:16 am

Doesn't that crawl run way too fast for most Fox-watchers to read anyway?

actor212 December 7, 2012 at 11:13 am

But they love white men who exploit the Negroes.

Lot_49 December 7, 2012 at 11:28 am

Engngngh…Brubeck was better than that. Check out the NYT obit. Pretty sure it says he was a Costco shopper too.

Lot_49 December 11, 2012 at 10:52 am

Couldn't resist sharing this with you:

To the Editor:
We mark with deep sadness the death of our friend and inspiration Dave Brubeck (“ Dave Brubeck, 1920-2012; His Music Gave Jazz New Pop,” front page, Dec. 6). We had the great privilege of interviewing him for a documentary series we made on the history of jazz in 2001, and have never forgotten the story he recounted from his boyhood on a California ranch:
“The first black man that I [ever] saw, my dad took me to see on the Sacramento River in California [a fellow cowboy like Brubeck’s father], and [my dad] said to his friend, ‘Open your shirt for Dave.’ ”
At this point in our interview, this elegant, compassionate man broke down in front of our camera. “There was a brand on his chest. And my dad said, ‘These things can’t happen.’ That’s why I fought for what I fought for.”
It’s hard to imagine a world without Dave Brubeck’s generosity, humanity and artistry. But then we still have his music, and listening to it, the pain of his loss eases just a bit.
KEN BURNS
LYNN NOVICK
New York, Dec. 7, 2012

HarryButtle December 7, 2012 at 12:10 pm

Even many of the angry white oldz know Take 5.

widestanceromance December 7, 2012 at 11:01 am

Dana, here's a decision YOU could have made better. Just because your coupon book has a coupon for a 50% off facelift , does not mean you saved anything by having your face trussed-up like a Thanksgiving turkey.

StealthMuslin December 7, 2012 at 11:01 am

Women working for FauxNews need to make better decisions.

bikerlaureate December 7, 2012 at 12:30 pm

Do you really imagine they have any career option that pays half as much?

We'd be hard pressed to find a better example of "opportunism". Not someone I'd want to hire, and then turn my back on…

Mumbletypeg December 7, 2012 at 11:01 am

Sorry to repeat myself (above) but there are apparently two wonkette posts nearly identical, for this story?

SayItWithWookies December 7, 2012 at 11:24 am

It's too early for interdimensional Wonkette.

Mumbletypeg December 7, 2012 at 11:32 am

With apologies to Alan Arkin/ Yossarian:

I SEE EVERYTHING TWICE!!1!…

YouFail4eva December 7, 2012 at 11:44 am

Huh, all I see are complete idiots on Fox News. And that is definitely something I do not need to see twice.

commiegirl99 December 7, 2012 at 1:17 pm

The new kid published before he was supposed to, and then tried to cover his tracks by deleting it. NEW KIDS!

FNMA December 7, 2012 at 11:01 am

If only that woman had decided not to be shot by that football player, everything would have been fine.

(I thought I posted on this thread, but it seems to have disappeared. Oh well…)

Aridzona December 7, 2012 at 11:01 am

"Skirt the issue" heh, heh. BTW, women are smarter than men, except when it comes to men.

BaldarTFlagass December 7, 2012 at 11:02 am

If women would just learn martial arts and samurai fighting and stuff, like the Deadly Viper Assassination Squad, they'd be tough enough to survive even a gunshot to the head and then avenge themselves also, like Uma Thurman/Beatrix Kiddo did.

not that Dewey December 7, 2012 at 11:03 am
Esteev December 7, 2012 at 11:06 am

Was it the women's fault for being at the school trying to "learn"? Report, decide, ect.

Mumbletypeg December 7, 2012 at 11:15 am

War on women is hell.

Fare la Volpe December 7, 2012 at 11:06 am

Perino n.
1. vulgar slang A woman who betrays other women so the big strong boys will like her. Feminine of quisling.
Synonyms: twat, twunt, douchecanoe.

YouFail4eva December 7, 2012 at 11:45 am

I can't add anything to this. Put it up on Urban Dictionary my good sir.

Geminisunmars December 7, 2012 at 1:43 pm

2. Short for perineum, and feminine of taint.

Botlrokit December 7, 2012 at 11:07 am

Yes, Dana. Women should not be born in Afghanistan and Saudi Arabia. How fucking stupid of them.

sundaytrucker December 7, 2012 at 11:08 am

So true. Women are always dropping their hands and leaving themselves open to the hook.

bikerlaureate December 7, 2012 at 12:31 pm

And that can be unlearned. But do they? No.
Yet another bad decision. They can be so infuriating.

Theywontlisten December 7, 2012 at 2:52 pm

See what we (women) made them do?

actor212 December 7, 2012 at 11:08 am

Perino makes me feel stabby

christianmuslin December 7, 2012 at 11:09 am

Cut off his dick and feed it to the dog or into oncoming traffic on the freeway. Better decisions sheeple, better decisions.

Theywontlisten December 7, 2012 at 2:53 pm

Woman to man, "see what you made me do?

Schmegeg December 7, 2012 at 11:11 am

PERINO: Well, maybe, or make better decisions.

A sugestion for Dana: Decide to make hot lesbo videos and post them online.

Blueb4sinrise December 7, 2012 at 11:12 am

MAke better sammiches!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Esteev December 7, 2012 at 11:15 am

More meat, less lettuce. HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO SAY IT!

BaldarTFlagass December 7, 2012 at 11:12 am

Slightly less than half the voters in this country recently showed their inability to "make better decisions."

DahBoner December 7, 2012 at 11:14 am

I think it skirts the issue

Hahaha. Don't forget to tip your waitress. They'll be here all week…

not that Dewey December 7, 2012 at 11:15 am

Suzanne Venker: "women are going to have to become comfortable with sacrifice and capitulation."

Mumbletypeg December 7, 2012 at 11:55 am

Nice news tip. Be a shame if any… crediting/ tipster sourcing… happened to it..

TootsStansbury December 7, 2012 at 11:15 am

This shit gives me snarkolepsy.

arihaya December 7, 2012 at 11:15 am

damn, Fox really have a binder of hot dumb blondes

pinkocommi December 7, 2012 at 11:17 am

I am so tired of the Republican theory that the best way to fight gun violence is more gun violence. These are the same people who push fundamentalist christianity while ignoring all the many messages of Jesus regarding turning the other cheek and blessed are the peacemakers…. If Jesus were alive today, he would not be a member of the NRA.

Lot_49 December 7, 2012 at 11:31 am

You mean when a loony starts shooting in a dark theater you wouldn't feel safer if the intended victims started shooting back? That's practically un-American.

YouFail4eva December 7, 2012 at 11:48 am

Yes, because the smartest thing to do if you are in a crowded theater is to just start shooting wildly, and hope you hit the assailant. Collateral damage? Fuck 'em, they should have had guns as well.

T3rbo December 7, 2012 at 11:56 am

Look, I'm pretty good at playing Halo, and I NEVER have a problem taking out other players when they come at me shooting. Ever. If I was in that movie theater, I probably would have killed him with my survival knife, when he wasn't looking, because Freedom.

SuspectedDemocrat December 7, 2012 at 12:10 pm

In order to take down that shooter, you would need to go into the movie wearing your own body armor, carrying an AR-15 with armor piercing bullets. Wouldn't you feel safer if at least a few of your fellow movie goers did that every time you went to see a movie?

FNMA December 7, 2012 at 11:36 am

I don't know. Jesus said "Blessed are the peacemakers," and the Colt .45 is also known as The Peacekeeper. Or maybe it was a reference to malt liquor. Something like that.

BaldarTFlagass December 7, 2012 at 11:39 am

I thought it was "blessed are the cheesemakers."

FNMA December 7, 2012 at 11:42 am

I think he meant manufacturers of dairy products in general.

pinkocommi December 7, 2012 at 11:46 am

Cheese is fucking delicious. So that would be the first part of the Bible to make sense to me.

drbill0620 December 7, 2012 at 9:58 pm

I think he meant blessed are the pace-makers…

actor212 December 7, 2012 at 11:39 am

In the right neighborhoods, Colt .45 is known as The Piece Getter.

Ruhe December 7, 2012 at 11:52 am

Less a theory and more a fantasy. A point I've made on occasion with some of my conservative acquaintances is that if you find yourself in a situation where you are threatened by someone with a gun you are at obvious disadvantage even if you are armed yourself, ie, their gun is already in their hand. These dimwits imagine a fantasy scenario where all gun toting citizens are able to skillfully "throw-down" and out draw their assailants. There should be an episode of "Mythbusters" on this.

T3rbo December 7, 2012 at 11:53 am

Look, if everyone was a sniper, there would be more awesome gun violence, which is kind of what you want. Imagine if the Aurora theater shooter was taken out by fifteen simultaneous headshots after one of the theater goers threw a stun grenade? Imagine if ALL domestic violence could be resolved by women sneaking up on their significant others using silenced pistols? Imagine cops shooting escaped murderers from helicopters at all hours of the day! This probably would not solve any of our problems, but it would resolve my feelings of inadequacy and shame that I have from childhood. I personally think that surveillance cameras that have (you guessed it) sniper rifles on them would have made columbine AND 9/11 less confusing and hard to process.
And wasn't jesus like some kind of Semitic ninja master? I seem to recall a story of him throwing ninja stars at the last second to stop a muslim with a suicide vest from blowing up a cafe in Jerusalem…

StillGoinGreen December 7, 2012 at 11:18 am

Let's say I was bangin' the ever-loving shit out of Dana and she just wouldn't stop spouting off stupid conservative shit. If I hit her in the bush with a shoe, would that be domestic violence or a political statement?

Esteev December 7, 2012 at 11:32 am

Either way, it would be hot. But get a good lawyer just in case.

StillGoinGreen December 7, 2012 at 11:41 am

In answer to your question – yes, yes I do. And why do they keep popping up on my Dropkick Murphys station on I♥Radio? They ain't fucking Irish!

drbill0620 December 7, 2012 at 10:00 pm

Well, if you hit her with one of her own stiletto heeled shoes – that would most likely be a political statement…

elviouslyqueer December 7, 2012 at 11:19 am

Dana, darling. I work in the field of domestic and intimate partner violence. So I feel pretty sure I'm on the right page in calling you an ignorant, odious twatwaffle.

Redgyal December 7, 2012 at 11:19 am

Speaking of violence against the weak… http://abagond.wordpress.com/2012/12/05/jordan-da

Lot_49 December 7, 2012 at 11:20 am

But she's so pretty.

BaldarTFlagass December 7, 2012 at 11:41 am

Pretty face, ugly brain.

Lot_49 December 7, 2012 at 11:44 am

Cognitive dissonance…does not compute…pretty = correct….ugly = liberal (Colmes)

widestanceromance December 7, 2012 at 11:20 am

LIke the bad decision to not lie there and enjoy it?

BaldarTFlagass December 7, 2012 at 11:21 am

Women should have handguns, and they should hold them sideways when they fire them, so it looks cool, like in those Hong Kong movies.

SuspectedDemocrat December 7, 2012 at 12:53 pm

And they should be cleaning them when asking, "Did you take out the trash?"

CrunchyKnee December 7, 2012 at 11:32 am

I'd still hit that.

FNMA December 7, 2012 at 11:37 am

With what?

BaldarTFlagass December 7, 2012 at 11:38 am

And if you did, it would be her fault for making a bad decision.

YouFail4eva December 7, 2012 at 11:49 am

Hooray for no liability, responsibility or ethical considerations!

jaytingle December 7, 2012 at 11:32 am

Oh, Wonkette, this story is the ideal time to remind us of Ms. Perino's "poor choice" in men. http://wonkette.com/257848/dana-perinos-husband-t

bikerlaureate December 7, 2012 at 12:34 pm

So she's speaking from experience… and yet we snark at her.
But she stays on the air, so the continued opportunities for snark are assured.

Wow, she's like the duchess of stupid decisions.

commiegirl99 December 7, 2012 at 1:15 pm

My mom was in jail when she was 8 months pregnant with me for failing to appear on a leash-law ticket. The nice jail matron didn't make her have a vag search.

docterry6973 December 7, 2012 at 11:33 am

Didn't pay his unlicensed dog ticket. The guy is a regular Dillinger.

HistoriCat December 7, 2012 at 11:40 am

Top of the world ma!

docterry6973 December 7, 2012 at 11:34 am

They should pay attention to how they dress for their man, too. I think Allen West waxed poetic on the subject.

Also, more sammiches.

T3rbo December 7, 2012 at 11:34 am

Talk about an empathy deficit-this is how you get to the top levels of the Republican party, by being the most cold reptilian bitch imaginable.
Poor people should accept the consequences of their actions and starve to death (possibly in old age)
Women should accept the consequences of their bad choices and be murdered by those they are in relationships with.
Look, if we started coddling people who make bad decisions, John Galt wouldn't be able to invent his magic motor that saves the world-is that what you want? Jesus wants the cream to rise to the top, also.

Lot_49 December 7, 2012 at 11:51 am

True only if you consider appearing on Fox to be the top levels of the Republican Party. The real leadership is a pure sausage-fest: McConnell, Boehner, Demint, etc.

T3rbo December 7, 2012 at 11:58 am

Yeah, but she was able to be Patty Hearst-do you think they let anyone go with them and rob the banks? Wait, I mean be press secretary. Freudian slip

bikerlaureate December 7, 2012 at 12:35 pm

There are at least two participants in every murder.

If a woman's hanging out with a potential murderer – what kind of a smart decision is that?

Monsieur_Grumpe December 7, 2012 at 11:34 am

She needs a spanking…. not the nice kind of spanking.

BlueStateLibel December 7, 2012 at 11:36 am

Yes, and Mitt Romney still has a good chance to win the presidency! The polls are shifting as we speak! (BTW, this is also the same Dana Perido that said "We did not have terrorist attacks under Bush." http://mediamatters.org/video/2009/11/24/perino-w

T3rbo December 7, 2012 at 11:40 am

This is how you win back the Wymn vote? "Coming up next on Fox News: are Mexicans dangerous vermin that must be exterminated?"

weejee December 7, 2012 at 11:40 am

Gunz in the house produce a greater health risk than benefit. Guntard rebuttal is that is Harvard and science talking.

calliecallie December 7, 2012 at 11:43 am

Makes you wonder which Native woman he's abusing…

EatFrankRich December 7, 2012 at 11:52 am
Mittens Howell, III December 7, 2012 at 11:44 am

I rely heavily on the FOX upskirt network when I'm forming my ideas on women's issues, because I get to think deeply on these things while looking at pretty legs, and maybe knickers.

BaldarTFlagass December 7, 2012 at 11:48 am

She does have nice shoulders.

Toomush_Infer December 7, 2012 at 11:46 am

Happiness is a warm gun….Dana…

YouFail4eva December 7, 2012 at 11:51 am

I don't get it. How does the former spokesperson for the white house, somebody who should understand how to handle public relations, make such brain dead statements. It's almost like they don't care about the "war on women". Oh wait…

malsperanza December 7, 2012 at 12:11 pm

Or wars of any kind. Cuban Missile Crisis, whatevs.

Guppy December 7, 2012 at 11:52 am

Yeah, instead of dating a football player she should have chosen to be a lesbian. Er, wait…

sullivanst December 7, 2012 at 11:52 am

I don't like to use this word, but it's the only reaction I have: Cunt! Cunt cunt cunty cunt cunt. Shut your stupid fucking mouth before the rapey one over there shuts it for you, and you discover what a poor decision you made being in proximity to such people.

Lizzietish81 December 7, 2012 at 11:53 am

Didn't he hold meetings with only a select group of reporters and refused to allow any questions?

VA_Dreaming December 7, 2012 at 12:01 pm

It seems to me the one making the bad decision is the person choosing to beat or berate another person!

SuspectedDemocrat December 7, 2012 at 12:21 pm

That's crazy talk!

SuspectedDemocrat December 7, 2012 at 12:02 pm

If only there had been more guns in the Belcher home.

sullivanst December 7, 2012 at 12:03 pm

Wayne LaPierre is well ahead of you.

SuspectedDemocrat December 7, 2012 at 12:21 pm

Wow. My snark is useless against them. It's like housewives should be carrying a loaded sidearm in a holster at all times, especially around dinner time when family is visiting.

bikerlaureate December 7, 2012 at 12:37 pm

And maybe then the bathroom wouldn't be the most dangerous room in the home!

sullivanst December 7, 2012 at 12:52 pm
BornInATrailer December 7, 2012 at 12:35 pm

"Say it with us three times: I choose not to be beat. I choose not to be beat. I choose not to be beat."

I would have gone with "Beatlechoose! Beatlechoose! Beatlechoose!"

a_pink_poodle December 7, 2012 at 12:46 pm

The better decision being that they should go back into the kitchen and give their man the fantasy 50's lifestyle that white conservatives love jacking off to DUUUUUH

Nostrildamus December 7, 2012 at 1:08 pm

I'd pay good money to see Dana Perino a remake of "The Birds".

Biff December 7, 2012 at 1:27 pm

In all honesty, I haven't been beaten or raped since I got my first gun.

dcjdjay December 7, 2012 at 2:19 pm

Not News: Dana Perino still stupid.

NinjaCat_Baba December 7, 2012 at 2:52 pm
BZ1 December 7, 2012 at 4:24 pm

Greg Gutfeld, sometime comedian, full time fool.

lochnessmonster December 7, 2012 at 5:17 pm

Member that lady in FL who shot into the air to scare her abusive boyfriend and she ended up in jail?

drbill0620 December 7, 2012 at 9:55 pm

PERINO: I think it skirts the issue that women are victims of violence all the time –

Serves them right fir always wearing those short skirts ..

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