Wonkette is yr war correspondence headquarters! First we brought you hard-hitting coverage of the war on Christmas. Now, we bring you trenchant analysis of American’s next great conflict: the war on marriage and men:
…I’ve spoken with hundreds, if not thousands, of men and women. And in doing so, I’ve accidentally stumbled upon a subculture of men who’ve told me, in no uncertain terms, that they’re never getting married. When I ask them why, the answer is always the same.
Women aren’t women anymore.
Ladies are not ladies! Men are still men, but they are sad menz who don’t want to get married! This war is ON.
In a nutshell, women are angry. They’re also defensive, though often unknowingly. That’s because they’ve been raised to think of men as the enemy. Armed with this new attitude, women pushed men off their pedestal (women had their own pedestal, but feminists convinced them otherwise) and climbed up to take what they were taught to believe was rightfully theirs.
Now the men have nowhere to go.
So…ladies had a pedestal, but it was not the same as the menz pedestal, but then ladies stole the menz pedestal and gave up their pedestal instead, but menz do not apparently want the lady pedestal. Got it?
Sometimes war is senseless and tragic, dear readers.
Ms. Venker’s credentials to provide coverage of our generation’s VietNam are impeccable. She’s the niece of O.G. cultural warrior Phyllis Schlafly. She has written no fewer than TWO DOZEN dispatches about this war for National Review alone. In short, she’s the Edward R. Murrow of the battle of the sexes.
Not all news outlets respect Ms. Venker’s expertise, however. Some call her delusional while others accuse her of strawmanning. Ms. Venker has addressed the concerns raised by lesser news sources and has now revised and extended her remarks to explain that sometimes she writes so darn much it is hard to keep track:
“I understand. All I can say in my defense is that it can be so hard when you write as much as I’ve written—three books, articles, blogs—you think you have said something but you haven’t. It’s like I am thinking something and I am so clear about it and I think what I have said is that. I don’t know. I don’t know. I didn’t think that much about it. It is an important distinction between men and husbands for sure.”
Marxist rag Daily Kos points out that this statement is a bit of a notpology:
So, in other words, she meant to say that wives suck, which is completely different, but she somehow ended up writing that women suck because when you’ve written three whole books—and you blog!—it’s just way too much work to remember the difference between “men and women” and “husbands and wives.” So all you haters out there who are mocking the crap out of Venker can just stop it right now because she didn’t even mean it that way so there.
Daily Kos is probably overrun by feminists who will never get married so we don’t even know why Ms. Venker would talk to them. Ms Venker doesn’t just report the news. She offers us a way out of the madness of war:
Fortunately, there is good news: women have the power to turn everything around. All they have to do is surrender to their nature – their femininity – and let men surrender to theirs.
If they do, marriageable men will come out of the woodwork.
Let’s recap. First, it is hard to remember what you write when you write many things! Next, women are pedestal-stealers and now men have nowhere to go, except that men have gone into the woodwork, but men will come out if the ladies will just surrender to their nature.
War is hell, people. War. Is. Hell.