down in his b-boy stance

Hurricane Hypeman Joe Biden Warms Up The East Coast For Your Homeboy Barack Obama

He sees you baby, shaking that ass, shaking that assJoe Biden can literally say any fucking thing in the goddamn world, and it does not matter. Said Joey the Biden to Sandy victims to make them feel better and convince them they have a black friend:

“So as the president said when he was up here with the governor, we’re not going anywhere. We’re not going anywhere. And you’ve got a homeboy in the deal who gets it.”

On the plus side, Joe Biden’s weirdly benign racial cluelessness is turning in a more positive direction, warming up the crowd for when Obama and Jay-Z come out to do a modified duet of “Bonnie and Clyde.”

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Unconfirmed pool reports also state that Biden stood astride a wrecked home and bellowed, “YOLO!” to the heavens while hurling unopened bottles of Ciroc into the ocean.

[Washington Post]

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Hola wonkerados.

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132 comments

    1. JustPixelz

      Especially if he talked about homeboy Romney. 'Course Romney has so many houses, Ryan would probably just call him "homes" for short.

    2. Terry

      If Romney-Ryan had been elected, there would have been a massive mid-Atlantic depression centered directly over my apartment.

      1. Barbara_

        Terry, I hope you have a wonderful Thanksgiving! I'm walking out the door for vacation and you are one of the many things I am Thankful for. Love~

    3. Maman

      no kidding. I assigned my husband to read "Atlas Shrugged" weeks and weeks ago so someone in my house could discuss it and he still hasn't finished that thing yet. It sucks that much. And that is Ryan's mantra.

    4. Callyson

      It would have been the equivalent to The Big One that my east coast relatives keep telling me will hit Los Angeles any day now.

      Happy Thanksgiving!

    1. BadKitty904

      It's expected of Handsome Ol' Joe. Plus *he's* cute when he does it, 'cause everyone knows he – unlike those cynical, pandering GOP feebs – sincerely means well.

  1. Terry

    " Joe Biden’s weirdly benign racial cluelessness"

    This is what happens when well meaning old guys try to use the modern lingo.

  2. Chet Kincaid_

    By "homeboy" I assume he means himself, being from the East Coast, not the President.

    EDIT: Per the WaPo article, that's exactly what he was saying. So where's the "cluelessness"? Everyone routinely uses black colloquialisms from like 70 years ago, all the time. Not to mention Wonketters, who think a handful of scenes from "Blazing Saddles," "Animal House" and "Airplane" are the funniest things any black people said in all of recorded history.

    1. Lascauxcaveman

      I'm partial to the old Bill Cosby stuff myself, but that's because I'm "square."

      (Wow, that one really is about 70 years old, isn't it? I think I'll go smoke some tea, now.)

    2. HateMachine

      Apparently all recorded slang in history is "our word(s)" now.

      When I think "racial cluelessness" I'm usually thinking of the international exchange student who is wondering why white people's eyes are a bunch of weird colors and blah people's palms are paler. (Or the ridiculous questions I'm sure I ask while abroad)

    3. BerkeleyBear

      Not to mention Wonketters, who think a handful of scenes from "Blazing Saddles," "Animal House" and "Airplane" are the funniest things any black people said (as written by a bunch of white guys) in all of recorded history.

      FIFY.

      Personally, I'm more fond of biracial and cross cultural commentators like Chapelle and Key & Peele – although they do make me feel awfully guilty for laughing at times.

        1. BadKitty904

          That's what makes it so hysterically funny when he tries to use it. It's like my granddad trying to dubstep.

      1. Monsieur_Grumpe

        I've been busy. For some unknown reason my employers expect me to produce results. I blame Bush.

  3. BornInATrailer

    A less racially charged America is a good thing.

    However, Joe Biden represents the prototype for the coming generations of colorblind older white men. So this is really just a taste of things to come. Sorry black/brown folks?

  4. deanbooth

    I know who Bonnie and Clyde are, sorta know generically who Jay-Z is (a rapper, maybe?), but why would somebody yell YOLO and what is a bottle of Ciroc? Are these mommy blog terms?

    (I read the today's birthdays list in the "newspaper" every day and realize that very soon I will know none of the people listed.)

    1. PubOption

      Ciroc is some kind of designer booze, which probably means that the bottle costs more than the contents. No idea about YOLO. Agree with you on the birthdays.

    2. MissTaken

      YOLO = you only live once

      Also, Beyonce and Jay-Z collaborated on a Bonnie and Clyde song once upon a time.

  5. kittensdontlie

    Beka Book's American Presidential History:

    Only black President: Bill Clinton.
    Only black Vice-President: Joe Biden.

  6. HRH_Maddie

    I call BS on Biden yelling "YOLO!" The guy is still using "homeboy" which means he's on a 12 year slang delay, which means in the next 4 years we can look forward to him adding "-izzle" to everything.

  7. Lascauxcaveman

    Even if Joe was actually referring to himself, Obama is secretly thrilled. He's always wanted to to be Joe Biden's homie.

    1. Esteev

      Straight outta Delaware, crazy motherfucker named Joe B
      From the gang called Dems With Attitude
      When I'm called off, I got a sign off
      Squeeze the biker-babes, and votes are hauled off
      You too, boy, if ya fuck with me
      The secret service are gonna hafta come and get me
      Off yo ass, that's how I'm goin out
      For the punk senators that's showin out
      Homeboys start to mumble, they wanna rumble

  8. MissTaken

    Whatevs. Handsome Joe could stand up and just read the dictionary and he would still be cooler than 99% of other white dudes.

  9. Serolf_Divad

    It's a shame the mics didn't pick up Biden's full whispered comments to Obama after the passage of the Afordable Care Act: "This is a big fucking deal …inaudible" should have read "This is a big, fucking deal, mah niggah!"

  10. BadKitty904

    Speaking for myownself, the pretty damned comical image conjured by that last paragraph made me LOL, thereby vexing the girl sitting next to me in the liberry.

  11. Trinket

    Joe Biden can literally say any fucking thing in the goddamn world, and it does not matter.

    You say that like it's a bad thing.

  12. James Michael Curley

    When Ol' Joe was up here he personally towed the John B. Caddell which had washed aground on Staten Island by holding the tow lines in his teeth. After it was back in the straights at the Aurthur Kill he said, "One thing in the world I hate: leeches. Filthy little devils"

  13. ttommyunger

    I am getting the impression that joe doesn't really give a fuck now, which makes me love him all the more.

  14. Lazy Media

    Y'all know that "home boy" refers to somebody from your hometown/state, right? I assumed Joe was referring to himself, since Delaware is right next to Jersey. If he's referring to Obama, then he don't know what that word mean.

  15. gurukalehuru

    Totally snark free comment this time around: You hit the nail on the head with "Joe Biden can literally say any fucking thing in the goddamn world, and it does not matter."
    When you're heart's in the right place, you don't need to worry about what comes out of your mouth.

  16. AznMom420

    In a moment of clarity joe responded to the audience, "its hard as fuck out here on these streets you cant walk to the bodega without fuckin your new kicks up so bad it look like you been kickin Mitt Romney in the ass for 7 months, dirty ass motherfucker. Fuck Sandy fuck that big windy bitch."

Comments are closed.