REMEMBER REMEMBER THE SIXTH OF NOVEMBER  10:05 am November 16, 2012

Anonymous Claims It Stopped Karl Rove From Hacking The Election By Hacking ORCA, We Think

by Rebecca Schoenkopf

Oh cool, Anonymous (we think it is Anonymous?) says Karl Rove was gonna vote fraud all the Machines, and that’s why he was so flabbergasted and refused to believe it when Fox called Ohio for Bamz, but they stopped him from stealing all the Machines by jamming up ORCA, because it was not actually a GOTV system but a “steal the vote” system, but they stopped him, we are pretty sure that is what the following letter, which we guess is from Anonymous probably, says. Seems legit! But here is our question! If Anonymous hacked ORCA and caused it to explode miserably on Election Day, how could Anonymous ever prove that ORCA was actually a vote-thieving program? If they hacked in, couldn’t they have planted code to make it look like Rove was gonna fraud the election? (Not that we believe for a second that Rove wasn’t trying to fraud the election, we are just saying, it seems like “logic.”)

Oh, and is that Assange they’re talking about at the end? We assume that is Assange. We never did pay attention like we should have.

[scribd]

 
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{ 300 comments }

BadKitty904 November 16, 2012 at 10:09 am

Riiiiiight. Next on the Anonymous agenda: TPing the GOP HQ

weejee November 16, 2012 at 10:11 am

This Anonymous prefers flaming bags of poo on their stoop.

eggsacklywright November 16, 2012 at 10:26 am

And their stoopid.

tonytyner November 16, 2012 at 4:29 pm

Wish they'd write a book with specifics and name names.

eggsacklywright November 16, 2012 at 10:10 am

I love conspiracy theories because they 'splain stuff.

BadKitty904 November 16, 2012 at 10:13 am

It *will* be pretty funny watching the Tinfoil-Hat Brigade freek the hell out over this…

Terry November 16, 2012 at 10:39 am

It'll be funnier to see the establishment GOP'ers freakout. I hope that little 105 mention they dropped in the message means something and that Rove's coders crapped themselves.

MacRaith November 16, 2012 at 10:53 am

The thing is, most conspiracy theories are unbelievable because they require superhuman competence on the part of the people executing the conspiracy. But this conspiracy was so incompetently executed that it might actually be real.

Geminisunmars November 16, 2012 at 12:11 pm

Which conspiracy? Anonymous's or Rove's?

serjjj November 16, 2012 at 9:09 pm

"most conspiracy theories are unbelievable because they require superhuman competence on the part of the people executing the conspiracy"

Hmm you mean like when we were told that 19 random Arabs with no experience in flying planes hijacked 4 aircraft armed only with boxcutters and spent the morning of 9/11/01 eluding the most sophisticated air defense system in the world after training for this right under the noses of our massive domestic police and intelligence system without arousing a whit of suspicion? Yeah I see what you mean.

Kate_fate November 18, 2012 at 1:40 pm

Thank you for having a brain that hasn't been washed by the non-liberal liberal press who have convinced these good people that there is nothing more shameful than to think two or more people agreeing to do wrong (aka a conspiracy) can only possibly be believed by crazy people. Incredibly, isn't it?

HouseOfTheBlueLights November 16, 2012 at 12:33 pm

In Fancy language, as is wont.

Mumbletypeg November 16, 2012 at 10:10 am

I will continue to not pay attention right along with you, Becca!

actor212 November 16, 2012 at 10:17 am

I'm not going to be so quick. Even if this is an Internet trolling, it will create all kinds of panic amongst the orcs. It should be fun to watch them stumble around looking for the leaks.

UW8316154 November 16, 2012 at 10:32 am

Exactly, because a guilty conscience will always respond with panic to accusations, trolled or otherwise.

actor212 November 16, 2012 at 10:56 am

Expect Tagg Romney to suddenly be called to missionary work in Africa.

Toomush_Infer November 16, 2012 at 10:10 am

The great part is me imagining that Karl Rove takes this seriously….

BadKitty904 November 16, 2012 at 10:14 am

"Curses! Foiled again!"

corthylio November 16, 2012 at 10:55 am

Tin foiled again?

Designer_Rants November 16, 2012 at 10:35 am

Shouldn't Megyn go ask the computer guys about this?

HempDogbane November 16, 2012 at 10:41 am

And as if Karl doesn't know how to fail all by himself.

freakishlywrong November 16, 2012 at 10:10 am

"ORCA" is an appropriate name for anything associated with Karl Rove.

boskolives November 16, 2012 at 10:20 am

I will now use "Orca" to replace my previous term for all things Rove, i.e. "bloated shit filled walking waterbed", in all my correspondence forthright, too.

thatsitfortheother1 November 16, 2012 at 10:56 am

W had his nickname just about right.

Negropolis November 16, 2012 at 10:34 am

I'm partial to PIG Rove, myself, kind of like Colbert's Ham Rove (RIP).

SorosBot November 16, 2012 at 10:55 am

It's worse than a bad acronym; the Obama campaign's get-out-the-vote software was called Project Narwhal, and in nature the orca is the only predator (besides some humans) of adult narwhals. See how clever they were being? Oh, and Narwhal actually kicked ORCA's ass.

MosesInvests November 16, 2012 at 11:37 am

ORC would be better.

viennawoods13 November 16, 2012 at 7:01 pm

The age of man is over. The time of the Orc has come!

Lascauxcaveman November 16, 2012 at 11:51 am

As a representative of the Pacific Northwest, where the noble Orca plies our clean, cold waters, under the watchful gaze of towering, snowcapped peaks, I ask of you, please don't denigrate this beautiful and majestic creature by associating it with a thing so vile as Karl Rove.

Isn't the there a toad, a hyena or warthog you can pick on somewhere?

sullivanst November 16, 2012 at 2:06 pm

Not really. Orcas are smart, powerful, lithe, and mostly black. Karl Rove has only ever been one of these, but he is powerful no longer.

ChillBill November 16, 2012 at 10:11 am

I though Nate Silver had done this.

freakishlywrong November 16, 2012 at 10:19 am

Nah, it was the new guy; Ships of Gold.

Designer_Rants November 16, 2012 at 10:35 am

He's got a dreamy name. When is his album coming out?

Terry November 16, 2012 at 10:51 am

Nate Silver pointed out with math that the Emperor had no clothes on.

AlterNewt November 16, 2012 at 11:37 am

Perhaps the Emperor could open a car wash.

HouseOfTheBlueLights November 16, 2012 at 12:34 pm

I thought WE did it. With votes.

lefty74 November 16, 2012 at 10:12 am

Rove fancies himself as Limbaugh's Dominican Tween.

boskolives November 16, 2012 at 10:23 am

There but for Oxytocin go I…

Dimitrios_M November 16, 2012 at 3:23 pm

And there but for Oxytocin, 400 pounds or pressurized blubber, an ego the size of Jupiter, and 5,253 days without a crap go I.

Dumbedup November 16, 2012 at 11:18 am

Actually, you know who Rove looks like? I'll give you two hints: "you sure do have a purty' mouth" and "squeal piggy". Right? Looks just like that male rape victim who is rescued (but too late) by Burt Reynolds.

eggsacklywright November 16, 2012 at 10:13 am

If Anonymous can do that, what are they waiting for with Fox? I still think installing a laugh track to their programming would be a good deed.

actor212 November 16, 2012 at 10:15 am

They could cut in bits of Stephen Fry's sex tapes!

Designer_Rants November 16, 2012 at 10:37 am

Fox News laughtrack? That, sir or madame, is GENIUS. Is your real name "Ships Of Gold"?

eggsacklywright November 16, 2012 at 10:42 am

Most kind. Just seemed logical. My rill name is Manny DiPresso.

Designer_Rants November 16, 2012 at 10:56 am

It reminds me of that scene from "Natural Born Killers" when they kill her parents – awful violence and ignorance are unfolding to a laugh track.

EatFrankRich November 16, 2012 at 1:59 pm

The attorney who plays a lawyer on TV? Or the TV actor who became an attorney?

Terry November 16, 2012 at 10:40 am

Fox may hire slightly better programmers than did Rove.

ManchuCandidate November 16, 2012 at 10:13 am

This would explain a great many things about why the GOPers were so delusional.

I dunno, I'm just going to sit in my Faraday cage and adjust my tinfoil hat.

Dudleydidwrong November 16, 2012 at 10:30 am

Faraday cage, huh? Take the next step. I spend eight hours each day sitting in my Orgone Accumulator Box getting my sexual batteries recharged while being protected from rancid rovian Faux Snooze waves. Wilhelm Reich himself checks on me every day at noon.

actor212 November 16, 2012 at 10:39 am

I have one of those, two. Stall three in the office men's room.

eggsacklywright November 16, 2012 at 10:44 am

Great Wilhelm's Ghost!

Jimmyone November 16, 2012 at 11:49 am

You have a Faraday cage??? All I have is a broken down colander and a garage with locks on the doors…

orthorim November 17, 2012 at 11:29 am

I don't know whether the claim is true or not but would I put this into the realm of possibility? Most certainly.

There have been questions about the process of voting – mysterious downtimes, computer equipment that's so laughably and primitively insecure that it's just flabbergasting, and narrow victories in swing states. Bush stole the first election from Gore (the second one, he did apparently not have to steal)

What I find strange is that these questions exist. If one were to design a system to count votes, would one not make absolutely SURE that all parties, and in fact all interested parties, could get real time access to everything that has happened, a system which logs everything and anything such that its impossible to cheat? Why are the systems designed in a way they are ridiculously easy to manipulate?

And calling votes on election night – that's also really problematic. If Rove really did rig up some severs – and DNS switching would just be so easy to do – then all questions about it would quickly get swallowed by disbelief – for one only "sore losers" would call for a recount; and secondly if Americans can't trust in the system of the election, everything is lost – it cannot be true what must not be true. This would protect any would be fraudsters from having their plot uncovered post-election.

Imagine an election like the one in 2000 took place, one party was declared winner, speeches were given, and entire large political apparatuses were set into gear for the change in presidency – and three weeks later an FBI investigation found that results in some swing states were rigged but the original result could not be restored.

That is something that must not happen, and therefore such an FBI investigation will never be started. It cannot happen because it must not happen.

Kate_fate November 18, 2012 at 1:44 pm

PRECISELY. Please see, for example, why the U.S. cannot possibly rig elections in Venezuela – the software is open source. http://www.democraticunderground.com/1091627#post

Loch_Nessosaur November 16, 2012 at 10:13 am

Don't believe any of it but anything that pours salt into the wounds of Karl Rove is fine by me.

bikerlaureate November 16, 2012 at 10:30 am

It hasn't really been proven yet that his phylum has nerve receptors.

corthylio November 16, 2012 at 10:59 am

More experiments are needed.

Mumbletypeg November 16, 2012 at 10:13 am

Yesterday was 'Tweeted-to Pieces Thursday'… I'll admit I'm more comfortable with "Hacked-to-Pieces Friday".

Respitetini November 16, 2012 at 10:14 am

I'll buy it, but I'm admittedly a little nutty that way. As much as I think defacing a homepage on a useless Government website (e.g. FBI.gov) is itself useless, that these kids are looking out gives me hope for humanity.

UnionSpies November 16, 2012 at 10:45 am

I don't know if I believe it but I think it would be cool if it were true. Either way, I'm impressed by the political engagement of our youth.

Dimitrios_M November 16, 2012 at 3:32 pm

Provided it is a youth, and not some forty-year-old failed dot-com former- millionaire-only-on-paper living in his mother's basement and lashing out at everyone more successful than he is. (Which includes his mother's paperboy.)

Or what is even scarier, a Tea Patriot with enough computer literacy to make an (admittedly lame) video and post it on YouTube.

UnionSpies November 16, 2012 at 4:02 pm

Good point. Or Julian Assange.Sent via BlackBerry by AT&T

orthorim November 17, 2012 at 11:33 am

+1 whether or not Anonymous actually has stopped voting fraud, what I do believe 100% is that they (A) were watching Rove and (B) are simply much better than anybody Rove could hire at what they do.

I've met some people that move in these circles and they were pretty amazing individually. It's like a religion to them, it is an absolute belief of doing the right thing. The size and scale of the system they're up against makes them stronger.

SavageDrummer November 16, 2012 at 10:14 am

Plausible…

weejee November 16, 2012 at 10:14 am

Carmina Burana does an end zone dance and spikes the turf with votes.

actor212 November 16, 2012 at 10:24 am

I thought she wore a fruit basket on her head and danced salsa?

boskolives November 16, 2012 at 10:29 am

Oh fortuna's sake, It was way past time for Rove to be well hung, with votes also

weejee November 16, 2012 at 11:13 am

for Rove to be hung

/ fixed, likely not so much well hung

CrankyLttlCamperette November 16, 2012 at 1:13 pm

This seems like the right place to leave this.

actor212 November 16, 2012 at 10:15 am

Ooooh, will they blow up Parliament (pronounced "Par-lee-ament") too?

BadKitty904 November 16, 2012 at 10:21 am

Guy Fawkes, Guy Fawkes,
'Twas his intent,
To blow up King and Parliament

Guppy November 16, 2012 at 10:27 am

He was in the Sex Pistols?

BadKitty904 November 16, 2012 at 10:32 am

Originally, but he left to form his own group, The Velvet Revolution, an anarcho-syndicalist punk-polka band…

UW8316154 November 16, 2012 at 10:40 am

Then some of the vowels in Velvet Revolution went on strike, the group shut down operation entirely, and re-emerged as Velvet Revolver.

EatsBabyDingos November 16, 2012 at 10:15 am

Anonymous is Oliver Stone.

actor212 November 16, 2012 at 10:25 am

Oliver Stone can be anagrammed to VIOLENT SORE! WAKE UP, SHEEPLE!

Mumbletypeg November 16, 2012 at 10:53 am

Weird wordplay.. I read that and thought "Oliver Reed."
Would that this were possible..

sewollef November 16, 2012 at 1:00 pm

Oh heck, I can't make up my mind. I want to believe it, but I think I'll wait for the Ken Burns Documentary.

Pragmatist2 November 16, 2012 at 10:16 am

Let's not be picky. I am entirely happy with the fantasy that Anonymous hacked ORCA which was a vote stealing machine. Truth be damned, I can get off on that for a long time.

Terry November 16, 2012 at 10:41 am

Especially in that this is likely to upset or annoy a wide range of GOP insiders.

PhilippePetain November 16, 2012 at 11:46 am

Yeah, it's a fun little fantasy to believe that it could be true, right? Especially with his reaction on Tuesday night. Oh well. I honestly do like their little mythos they're trying to build, and the throwback vocabulary. I know I shouldn't but I do.

glasspusher November 16, 2012 at 10:16 am

Considering Roves Crossroads GPS' record this past cycle, it looks like this hack was perfectly capable of sabotaging himself.

Terry November 16, 2012 at 10:42 am

Crossroads GPS was fully successful in fleecing old rich guys and putting the money in Rove's pocket. The rest is just details.

glasspusher November 16, 2012 at 12:20 pm

Indeed. The next step is to fleece them and give it to the opposition, rather than a back hole.

boskolives November 16, 2012 at 10:17 am

The truly great move would have been to flip the votes that were to be rerouted, doubling Bamz's slam dance on the Robme crime family.

Woodshedding November 18, 2012 at 12:15 pm

They didn't need to cheat for obama. That's the point.

Kate_fate November 18, 2012 at 1:46 pm

Anonymous brings down the criminals. They don't do so by making the honest folk into criminals.

DerrickWildcat November 16, 2012 at 10:17 am

This might be true.

SorosBot November 16, 2012 at 10:17 am

Sure, I trust a group of assholish kids obsessed with hentai tentacle rape porn to safeguard democracy.

actor212 November 16, 2012 at 10:26 am

I trust them before I trust a corrupt bunch of old white geezers who have mortgages and mistresses. At least Anonymous don't give a shit.

Terry November 16, 2012 at 10:43 am

…and is in it for the lulz rather than money.

eggsacklywright November 16, 2012 at 10:31 am

Bukake with machine votes.

Negropolis November 16, 2012 at 10:37 am

Hey, sometimes, you go with the guardians of democracy you have, and not the ones you wish you had. Just sayin'. They are doing a helluva better job at it than SOPA Congress.

corthylio November 16, 2012 at 11:04 am

Agreed.

UW8316154 November 16, 2012 at 10:42 am

You say that like hentai tentacle rape porn is a *bad* thing.

YouFail4eva November 16, 2012 at 11:13 am

You can take my hentai tentacle rape porn when you pry it from my cold, dead, extremely slimy hands.

LibrarianX November 16, 2012 at 10:51 am

So, who do we trust to oversee and protect our election process? DIEBOLD?

Mojopo November 16, 2012 at 11:27 am

We know that some of Anonymous are scary tentacle rape fans, but the greater majority of them are not. Some of them steal credit card numbers, and others do not. Most don't. As in any organization, there is a cache of crazies – demonstrably insane, really – who do not represent the majority but can certainly seem like it when the crazies are the only ones getting attention. Regarding what they can and cannot do (by choice or by ability), I respect the fact that any proclamations made by Anonymous are usually on behalf of the greater good. They seem to agree with plenty of rational people about the evils that plague our society. For whatever it is worth, I find them encouraging and hopeful. The non-criminals seem to have a personal, moral obligation to give a shit. I am so glad for their input.

That said – Orca was a piece of malfunctioning garbage lorded over by boobs and incompetents. The Republican brand of sinister geek behavior is evil without genius. They're mentally lazy, delusional and arrogant as hell. They get away with much, but they're failing. These people are so dazzled by their abilities and echo chamber opinions that they keep missing the big picture. Narcissists. They are their own undoing.

MissTaken November 16, 2012 at 12:04 pm

Yup, those fuckers posted my personal info after BART shut down the cell phones. I'm just a rider and really didn't need my real name out on the interwebs because BART fucked up. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/08/15/anonymou

Mojopo November 16, 2012 at 12:34 pm

Holy crap, that's terrible! So slimey.

SorosBot November 16, 2012 at 12:40 pm

Yeah, it totally makes sense to punish regular riders for the perceived crimes of the transit agency. Totally.

Grr angrier now.

Mojopo November 16, 2012 at 1:10 pm

Imma go ahead and pin this bullshit on the Paultardian wing of Anony.

Pithaughn November 16, 2012 at 12:08 pm

Speaking as a white hat cracker, what the grey hat and black hat crackers do is a form of digital evolution. As in nature the competition for resources is ongoing and never stops, so it is on the internet, except the resource that is up for grabs is access. The beneficial result for ordinary citizens is that firewalls are getting more and more secure, thus protecting data from bad actors. Even with all the breachs in access, the vast majority are not achieved with technical skill but with social skill, tricking someone to divulge passwords or other secrets. In this particular case, there may be a white knight on the inside of the ORCA operation that just did not want to see us slide completely into fascism.

mormos November 17, 2012 at 12:37 am

if we can't trust a group of assholish kids obsessed with hentai tentacle rape porn, then who can we trust?

orthorim November 17, 2012 at 11:35 am

those asshole kids – yep, they're the good guys here.

the bad guys look like Rove, Cheney, Romney, etc.

avedon November 19, 2012 at 11:19 am

Do you trust them less than people who are paid millions of dollars to destroy our democracy?

BadKitty904 November 16, 2012 at 10:17 am

Has Velvet Revolution's first album been released yet?

Guppy November 16, 2012 at 10:28 am

I'm torn between making a reference to Velvet Revolver and to Velvet Underground

eggsacklywright November 16, 2012 at 10:46 am

Maybe that's what Nico meant by All Tomorrow's Parties.

corthylio November 16, 2012 at 11:05 am

But the GOP is definitely yesterday's party?

eggsacklywright November 16, 2012 at 11:26 am

Quite so.

actor212 November 16, 2012 at 11:05 am

Turns out, they're part of Occupy, I think.

rocktonsam November 16, 2012 at 10:17 am

Turdblossom would know a hack when he sees one probably.

Ground Zero Mostel November 16, 2012 at 10:17 am

This kinda does make sense. As I was getting out the vote in PA, my better-half was in New York convinced "the die was cast" and Rove & Company were planning to Steal the Vote. We either believe they are deluded fools who just didn't see the blacks or the browns OR we believe that they their evil plan to steal it (in a few key counties) was ruined. Both are plausible explanations.

Guppy November 16, 2012 at 10:44 am
Redgyal November 16, 2012 at 11:16 am

Or they saw the blacks and browns and realized that their only chance was to steal the vote.

Schmannnity November 16, 2012 at 10:18 am

Please send a bouquet of Turdblossoms as condolences.

editor November 16, 2012 at 10:18 am

i dunno. making claims is a lot of fun, but they tend to be more convincing when backed up by evidence, rather than a silly mask. still, it will be fun to see rove's response to this. or trump's.

UW8316154 November 16, 2012 at 10:43 am

We need to find out how this affects Sarah Palin before coming to conclusions.

corthylio November 16, 2012 at 11:06 am

Who?

Isyaignert November 17, 2012 at 1:47 am

We saw Rove's response when on Fux News when he refused to believe that Ohio went for Obama after he rigged the vote (just like he did in 2000 an d 2004).

Kate_fate November 18, 2012 at 1:48 pm

And wasn't it COMPLETELY obvious at the time that the REASON for his meltdown was, he thought he'd made SURE there was no way Obama could take the state? How could people miss that?

PubOption November 16, 2012 at 10:19 am

Their message is too verbose, the teabaggers will never understand it.

HouseOfTheBlueLights November 16, 2012 at 12:35 pm

That is part of the plan.

MUHAMMED_PBUH November 16, 2012 at 1:02 pm

actually it strongly reminds me of the "Ye Olde Founding Fathers' Der Sturmer" language that tea partiers and sovereign citizens like to use

OneYieldRegular November 16, 2012 at 3:16 pm

In addition, if they'd referred to "a series of tubes" instead of "tunnels" it would have been more plausible.

smellypossum November 16, 2012 at 10:19 am

"Pleased we were to see…" WTF? Anonymous is actually Yoda?

Listen I do to voices in my head.

Guppy November 16, 2012 at 10:45 am

When script kiddies pretend to be English majors…

PhilippePetain November 16, 2012 at 11:48 am

I kind of imagine them writing this and laughing about how silly it sounds. They are computer geeks after all. Talking to each other in silly voices in public is the norm. If not, they're pretty ridiculous.

Guppy November 16, 2012 at 12:01 pm

They are pretentious and self-important before they are silly. More than a few of them masturbate to Atlas Shrugged, after all.

Redgyal November 16, 2012 at 11:20 am

Or maybe English as a second language using the wrong google translate tool.

The0ldMoloko November 17, 2012 at 9:08 am

Sounds more like a Nigerian prince who needs to move his money to the United States and will gladly share his fortune with you. All he needs your bank account number!

HRH_Maddie November 16, 2012 at 10:21 am

That would explain why Ham Rove seemed so certain Romney could still pull it out in Ohio…

bikerlaureate November 16, 2012 at 10:28 am

That was a bizarre reaction…

Anonymous didn't plant anything to implicate Rove because that pusbag is apparently immune and untouchable, able to flip off Congress when he's subpoenaed and such.

tootstots November 17, 2012 at 1:44 pm

It explains a lot! He was totally freaked when they called Ohio. Frankly, I was just sure he was going to screw the pooch somehow and he was too. I'm sure the people writing code for Rove were easy to find and track. How would Karl know the difference, why would he even think someone was watching him. He's always acted with impunity.

Baba_NinjaCat12 November 16, 2012 at 10:21 am

Velveeta cheeze, mmm!!!

actor212 November 16, 2012 at 10:29 am

The Cheese That Would Not Die

(that's a *real* obscure reference, so if you got it, Schmai-Gunug to you with your beer)

freakishlywrong November 16, 2012 at 10:23 am

Look Rethugs are always up to something, and stealing elections is not above them. I think their smugness about winning though came from the typical wingnut overreach of trying to deny people the vote. And then whitey saw all the browns in line and got scared and went home and turned on Faux.

Kate_fate November 18, 2012 at 1:50 pm

yeah, it would never have occurred to them that they might take advantage of the fact that THEY were supplying the voting machines. mm-hmm.

Aridzona November 16, 2012 at 10:24 am

It appears the Illuminati has ceded world control to a bunch of hackers — with purple prose.

smellypossum November 16, 2012 at 10:24 am

Not that I agree with what Yoda is prattling on about, but it would help to 'splain Rove's short on-air bitch fit re: calling Ohio on election night…

Designer_Rants November 16, 2012 at 10:48 am

He kept touching his right lapel and saying "What a beautiful evening for lovers", and yet his Red Team wasn't flipping the Ohio precincts. Why? Why had they failed him before Fox News, of all media outlets, called Ohio for the Usurper? Shenanigans! Interference! Sedition!! The Makers had paid good money for this election, and yet the product was not acceptable.

Mahousu November 16, 2012 at 10:25 am

This letter shows all the technical sophistication of your typical CSI episode.

Enhance!

LibertyLover November 16, 2012 at 10:26 am

I would like to think that there is an organization that is out there that is actually interested in protecting the interests of the voters and not those of the corporations. I also would like to believe that Rove will someday share a 8 by 10 foot prison cell with a large man named Bruno that will teach Rove a few things (with votes!).

Sadly, I am not that naive. But I can dream, can't I?

cognachas4paws November 16, 2012 at 10:26 am

I'm a bit upset that they called this thing ORCA. Orcas are highly intelligent creatures who work together for the betterment of the entire pod (community) they belong to. That is definitely NOT a GOP principle.

freakishlywrong November 16, 2012 at 10:42 am

They're also known as "killer whales". Coincidence? I think not.

e_z November 16, 2012 at 12:40 pm

Orca was the name of Quint's boat in "Jaws". It also sank as the credits rolled.

LibrarianX November 16, 2012 at 10:26 am

The geek shall inherit the earth

TribecaMike November 16, 2012 at 10:26 am

Peeping, peeping, peeping Tom.
Everybody cry out for peeping Tom.

– Toots & The Maytals
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ig4OiBwD43I

HRH_Maddie November 16, 2012 at 10:27 am

And I'm responsible for Obama winning PA. No need to thank me.

BadKitty904 November 16, 2012 at 10:36 am

Nevertheless, thank you, Maddie. It was a dirty job, but somebody had to do it.

DixvilleCrotch November 16, 2012 at 10:27 am

Needz moar cheezy drama

HouseOfTheBlueLights November 16, 2012 at 12:36 pm

Dragons.

neiltheblaze November 16, 2012 at 10:28 am

I like it. I don't give a shit if it's true or not as long as it flips out the Freepers.

Guppy November 16, 2012 at 10:30 am

All I got out of that was that Karl Rove and American Crossroads will force Mitt Romney's signature at Runnymede.

TribecaMike November 16, 2012 at 10:34 am

If that doesn't kick-start Ragnarok nothing will.

Negropolis November 16, 2012 at 10:30 am

This gives a whole new meaning to "Free Willy."

Today and always, all your bases are belong to us.

SorosBot November 16, 2012 at 11:02 am

Considering that the theme song keeps saying "Hold me, kiss me and love me" and was sung by Michael Jackson, for a movie starring a little boy, I always found that extremely creepy.

Bezoar November 16, 2012 at 10:30 am

I dunno….there's a certain plausibility here….and, thinking the fix was in (remember 'The Sting") could account for Karl's befuddled outrage and incredulity…
Maybe we should ask Mythbusters to look into it.

HistoriCat November 16, 2012 at 10:41 am

And then they blow up Rove a voting machine at the end!

LetUsBray November 16, 2012 at 10:32 am

Okay, but even if Turdblossom had a diabolical plan to steal Ohio (beyond the obvious making it a massive pain in the ass to exercise the right to vote) and it succeeded, wouldn't the prez still have won by 80 electoral votes?

actor212 November 16, 2012 at 10:38 am

Yes, but you couldn't know that before this plan would be put in place, given how "tight" they were calling the race all along. In the end, Rove should have just kept his mouth shut. Certainly, if this is just a troll, Anonymous bit into that confusion hard and exploited it, and if it's not, Rove just gave them a reason to gloat.

boskolives November 16, 2012 at 12:01 pm

By how gobsmacked Rove was acting after Ohio was called, he really must have been sure that the deal had been signed, sealed, and delivered, and that there must have been some temporary glitch that soon would be resolved so Mitt-face would get those votes.

sewollef November 16, 2012 at 1:20 pm

Look here…. can we be absolutely certain, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that Jason Bourne wasn't involved in this?

I mean, he was a programmed killer, right.

Geddit yet? Killer = Killer Whale = ORCA.

VodkaGoGo November 16, 2012 at 10:33 am

"it's like Superman 3"

HistoriCat November 16, 2012 at 10:42 am

Just don't confused about the decimal point.

Guppy November 16, 2012 at 10:47 am

The only redeeming part of the entire story was the black man?

eggsacklywright November 16, 2012 at 10:34 am

Karl's Orca coudn't shut that whole thing down. He tried to money-rape the election.

BZ1 November 16, 2012 at 10:34 am

Nah, Orca beached itself.

boskolives November 16, 2012 at 12:02 pm

Orca bleached itself, or just its asshole? That would also be Rove, by the way, too.

Negropolis November 16, 2012 at 10:36 am

Now, watch Paula Broadwell go in and fuck the brains out of Anonymous (Ono them, if you will) and compromise all their future plans. She's the new Mosh Girl.

Guppy November 16, 2012 at 10:49 am

I don't care how tightly-wound she is, a woman like that would not bed pasty, unwashed, orange-fingered nerds no matter what the reward.

Negropolis November 16, 2012 at 10:52 am

pasty, unwashed, orange-fingered nerds

She made the beast with two backs with Peaches, didn't she?

Guppy November 16, 2012 at 11:06 am

We have documented proof of Peaches going running every once in a while. Anonymous gets winded climbing the stairs out of their moms' basement.

Negropolis November 16, 2012 at 11:12 am

You know, before I'd posted my last comment, I was going to make a point that running doesn't mean you're not a nerd. Peaches is an awkward-looking man. Period. And no amount of long-distance running and no amount of shoulder stars changes that.

I'm not saying she's a gold-digger, but she ain't messin' with…

Dudleydidwrong November 16, 2012 at 10:36 am

Being somewhat paranoid I tend to want to accept what Anonymous is announcing. The question: which is greater, my paranoia or asshole Rove's scheming asshole desire to make sure Rmoney won?

sewollef November 16, 2012 at 1:23 pm

I'm with you Dud.

harleymae November 17, 2012 at 6:28 pm

Paranoia?There is no doubt Rove and his ilk are plotting against the people of the USA.The only question is the veracity of this statement.As much as I wish it wasn't possible,I do believe it to be an infinitely plausible possibility.

Wadisay November 16, 2012 at 10:36 am

My little scheme to assinate the Archduke Ferdinand certainly paid big dividends.

ElPinche November 16, 2012 at 10:39 am

Wait a second! I thought it was the freeloader brown moochers like me who stole the election?!

BadKitty904 November 16, 2012 at 10:41 am

Conspiracy!

ElPinche November 16, 2012 at 10:58 am

The Velveeta Revolution has begun !!!

MosesInvests November 16, 2012 at 11:46 am

Begun, the Velveeta Revolution has.

Negropolis November 16, 2012 at 10:39 am

OT: Oh, hell, Hostess has died. :(

UW8316154 November 16, 2012 at 10:52 am

Way to go, Bakers Union. Nice way to stand your ground and stand up for the workers.

Instead of an 8% pay cut for your 5,000 members, there is a 100% pay cut for all 18,500 employees.

YouFail4eva November 16, 2012 at 11:49 am

Yes, because obviously when a Union does not agree to a pay cut, the Executives just shut the entire company down. Face it, whether they agreed to the cuts or not, Hostess was going to die. The Execs never made a good faith effort to negotiate. They just wanted an excuse to kill the brand.

shelwood46 November 16, 2012 at 1:49 pm

It had nothing to do with the executives giving themselves 80%+ pay raises and enormous golden parachutes, or the mismanagement during their multiple bankruptcies or the huge debt load they assumed when taken over by venture capitalists (AKA Bained). Nope, it was all the union getting upset just because they stopped paying all pensions (for non-management) and demanded an 8% paycut and 30% benefit cut. Damned unions.

ps Tastykakes rule.

ElPinche November 16, 2012 at 10:52 am

I heard. I'm quite verklempt although I haven't had one of those spongy tubes of preservatives in years.

Blueb4sinrise November 16, 2012 at 10:55 am

It's Michelle O. pulling the strings to shut down all the crappy restaurants and poison snack factories. If they were real Americans, they would stay in business and LOWER prices to thwart the Food Hitler.

BadKitty904 November 16, 2012 at 10:56 am

On the plus side, their products have a shelf-life of approx. 1,200 years, so you should be all set for a while.

BigSkullF*ckingDog November 16, 2012 at 10:58 am

Oh No! Now who will I not buy my chemical laden, apocalypse proof baked goods from?

Monsieur_Grumpe November 16, 2012 at 11:09 am

Maybe now we can find out what Wonder Bread is made of.

smokefilledroommate November 16, 2012 at 11:12 am

people.

BigSkullF*ckingDog November 16, 2012 at 11:15 am

My older brother once told me Hostess Snowballs were made from dead unicorns.

smokefilledroommate November 16, 2012 at 11:18 am

At least he didn't tell you that Ho-Ho's were made from dead prostitutes.

Isyaignert November 17, 2012 at 1:54 am

Twinkies are a victim of corporate raiders. The group that owns Hostess has no experience or interest in running a bakery. The company was merely a means to rob a pension plan and load up an otherwise profitable company with debt. Fukkers.

Negropolis November 16, 2012 at 10:41 am

It was Anonymous, on the internets, with a server.

Steverino247 November 16, 2012 at 11:01 am

What gave you the first Clue?

Geminisunmars November 16, 2012 at 12:56 pm

I thought it was all Chutes and Ladders.

woolmyn November 16, 2012 at 3:40 pm

As I Scrabble for a reply, I have to concede you have the Monopoly on comments. I won't Risk embarrassing myself.

Gleem McShineys November 16, 2012 at 4:41 pm

Uno, it seems legit, because Karl Rove was not Sorry for his reaction on teevee.

(Still available for terrible punmanship: Mousetrap, Operation, and Boggle!)

TribecaMike November 16, 2012 at 10:42 am

See what happens when you forget your safe word, kids?

Blueb4sinrise November 16, 2012 at 10:42 am

Is it the FBI or CIA that will send hawt photos to Anonymous?

Negropolis November 16, 2012 at 10:44 am

Needz more lesbian Natalie Portman and torture porn.

BigSkullF*ckingDog November 16, 2012 at 10:55 am

Doesn't everything?

BadKitty904 November 16, 2012 at 10:46 am

Isn't that letter from the script of an old Vincent Price flick?
http://sp.theyoungriderstv.net/wordpress/wp-conte

Mumbletypeg November 16, 2012 at 10:51 am

Well, thanks. Yet another film, I couldn't help but note, Price and Charles Bronson have been in together!

TribecaMike November 16, 2012 at 11:01 am

"The threat of invincible power!"

ElPinche November 16, 2012 at 10:46 am

105 passwords were tried to penetrate the Great Oz (obviously a plug for Sam Raimi's next film? ):

F0xNewsRulz
Hamr0ve
R0veHatesDaBl4cks
P1geyedFatfuck
D4ftTubofSh1t
P3tranusLovesPunt4ng

BigSkullF*ckingDog November 16, 2012 at 10:55 am

Why is that guy dressed up like the killer from those Scream movies? Halloween is over.

TribecaMike November 16, 2012 at 10:59 am

Grifted? More like drifted.

Negropolis November 16, 2012 at 11:01 am

OT: Oh, shit. CNN is reporting that rockets are falling just short of Jerusalem.

BadKitty904 November 16, 2012 at 11:06 am

"Air-raid sirens in Jerusalem" = not good.

HouseOfTheBlueLights November 16, 2012 at 12:38 pm

Can we just let them obliterate each other this time?

ChrisM2011 November 16, 2012 at 11:01 am

Hacking Orca? Didn't Richard Harris already do this?

Monsieur_Grumpe November 16, 2012 at 11:07 am

Actually I hacked into the Anonymous hack and had it turn every other vote for Ron Paul into a vote for The Lizard People. I don’t think anyone noticed.

SayItWithWookies November 16, 2012 at 11:08 am

Normally I'd've stopped reading right at "Pleased we were," since pseudo-medieval linguistic pomposity is really just too annoying to put up with. But for the sake of news I kept reading until I hit "you put your faith in we." That was enough. Disgusted me were with inability of they to dredge up some proper pronoun usage.

BadKitty904 November 16, 2012 at 11:10 am

I just figured Google Translate was screwing with 'em…

Woodshedding November 18, 2012 at 12:18 pm

They do that on purpose. Every heard of Guy Fawkes? It's just part of the way they stay anonymous.

christianmuslin November 16, 2012 at 11:08 am

Have they considered that a realistic platform and a non-lying scumbag candidate might have worked too? Oh yeah, republican party!

ttommyunger November 16, 2012 at 11:08 am

Convinced, I am, that this was written by Yoda; and if he's on our side, Karl is so fucked!

BlueStateLibel November 16, 2012 at 11:09 am

It would have been really cool if they had set off Mitt Rmoney's fireworks over Boston Harbor while he was giving his concession speech – still can't believe the jerk was going to set them off if he had won.

writechic November 16, 2012 at 11:10 am

An Ohio journo I know lives in Rove's butthole. And he was spewing Rovian spew hours before the Rove freakout. It made me think something's rotten in the Buckeye State, but who knows. Here's some of the spew:

"ANALYSIS OHIO: Be very careful of these public polls showing the president leading by more than a point. I see the data. But my gut is telling me something different. Obama won Ohio in 2008 by only 4.6 percent of the vote, under some of the best circumstances for Democrats. Enthusiasm was way down for McCain at the end of the eight Bush years. Obama won with about 260,000 votes out of more than 5.7 million cast. Let's look at the Romney strategy: Flip Hamilton County from blue to red. I believe he'll do that tonight. Increase the rural conservative turnout. I believe he'll do that tonight. Outperform McCain in the urban areas, especially Columbus. I believe he'll do that tonight. Outperform McCain in the coal counties. He'll do that too. Early votes also have Romney way above the McCain level, and Obama down in his key counties from 2008. These are all the ingredients for a very close election. And if the enthusiasm gap for Obama, especially among younger voters which I have reported throughout the year, still exists, there is no way he can repeat his margin of 2008. In addition, Republicans swept every statewide office in the midterm of 2010. True, SB 5 was repealed with 61% of the vote in 2011. But on that same ballot, 68% of Ohioans voted against Obamacare. My sense is the frustration and anger with the president is still very real in Ohio. It would not surprise me at all, when all the votes are counted, that Mitt Romney carries the Buckeye State."

BadKitty904 November 16, 2012 at 11:13 am

What is with these people and "listening to their gut"? Have they never heard of Rolaids???

e_z November 16, 2012 at 12:46 pm

They listen to their gut and then they pull their conclusions out of their asses.

Quod erat demonstrandum.

bureaucrap November 16, 2012 at 11:12 am

I'm willing to buy the premise, but it raises more questions than it answers. Anonymous, if you're listening: tell us how they planned to do it. Was it through the famous "Romney Inc." electronic voting machines? by creating false reports to Ohio Secretary of State? Or by the old fashioned method of having a good friend that WAS the Republican Secretary of State?

bureaucrap November 16, 2012 at 11:16 am

And for God's sake, please have someone in your group taking a writing class. Enough with the metaphors already!

Eve8Apples November 16, 2012 at 11:14 am

Could Anonymous please use its superhacking powers to gain access to Rove's Super PAC monies and make it disappear?

Lot_49 November 16, 2012 at 11:33 am

It's easy to see why their plot was successful. The hid behind a password protected firewall. Sheer unhackable genius!

Crank_Tango November 16, 2012 at 11:33 am

Awesome, except for making it look like Rove was gonna steal the vote, the teatards are just gonna believe anonymous stole it for Barry. Thanks, guys.

johnnyzhivago November 16, 2012 at 11:35 am

Too bad they couldn't hack into Mitt's CPU….

BadKitty904 November 16, 2012 at 11:46 am

"This device will self-destruct on November 6th. All personnel have four more years to reach minimum safe distance."

johnnymeatworth November 16, 2012 at 11:42 am

Maybe next they''ll take credit for canceling the Romney staff's credit cards on election night….

Geminisunmars November 16, 2012 at 1:01 pm

That was a bonus.

GoodDogThor November 16, 2012 at 11:45 am

Hey, let's be careful snarking on Anonymous… We don't want the Great Wonk blinking out of existence.

Although I'm sure the servers are all backed up. Right, Trix?

sewollef November 16, 2012 at 1:33 pm

Er, yeah…. snarking bad things about those guys is generally not considered a smart move. Although their known exploits tend to expose weaknesses in establishment websites, they have been known to not all sing from the same hymn book…. and attack for no damn good reason.

I think Anonymous are all super terrific chaps personally.

nealrauhauser November 16, 2012 at 3:33 pm

Ya know, they did blink Robert Stacy McCain out of existence earlier. That made me smile …

Negropolis November 16, 2012 at 10:12 pm

WARBLOG!

Kid_Charlemagne November 16, 2012 at 11:47 am

This can't be true. There's no siren on Matt Sludge's site.

BadKitty904 November 16, 2012 at 11:52 am

Yet.

johnnyzhivago November 16, 2012 at 11:47 am

This is Mitt after being hacked:
http://youtu.be/e9L9A1IMTQo

BadKitty904 November 16, 2012 at 11:48 am
HouseOfTheBlueLights November 16, 2012 at 12:46 pm

Meanwhile, if they've got half the brain I hope they do, the Dems are leaving the presidential operations in place to start taking back house seats, and adding to the total in the Senate.

Monsieur_Grumpe November 16, 2012 at 1:50 pm

GAH!!!11!

T3rbo November 16, 2012 at 11:50 am

A bunch of rich corporate types tried to steal the election with software, but they were thwarted by anonymous hackers who installed a firewall? Pictures or GTFO

mrblifil November 16, 2012 at 11:52 am

Anonymous make my penis larger both in girth and in length. Next time you attempt sex, I recommend you try Anonymous.

iburl November 16, 2012 at 11:53 am

I approve of this message.

Blueb4sinrise November 16, 2012 at 12:01 pm

So Peaches talked to Congress about Benghazi .
Whaddaya think he said?

fitley November 16, 2012 at 12:02 pm

I thought it odd but Rove was obviously trying to buy time on election night with his nonsense reasons for why he thought Ohio was going to go for Romney. Nate Silver had already shown it was not going to happen, yet there was Rove all flustered and confused about what was / was not happening.

HouseOfTheBlueLights November 16, 2012 at 12:45 pm

He had all the SuperPac money riding on 45 Red, was the problem.

CrankyLttlCamperette November 16, 2012 at 1:54 pm

But…you ALWAYS bet on black!!!

boskolives November 16, 2012 at 12:04 pm

NO, I'M ANONYMOUS!

actor212 November 16, 2012 at 12:07 pm

AND SO IS MY WIFE!

DahBoner November 16, 2012 at 12:13 pm

Yeah, I heard the head of ORCA was a big blowhard…

jolpaj November 16, 2012 at 12:15 pm

Anonymous is the WEAVER from Perdido Street Station

GeorgiaBurning November 16, 2012 at 12:16 pm

Hmm.. ugly, fat, on all the TV channels threatening world stability. Rove does fit the profile of a James Bond movie villain. But where are the gorgeous women?

Tommmcatt_Again November 16, 2012 at 12:17 pm

Remember, Remember the 6th of November!
The turdblossom treason and plot!

… Seriously though, how long until Newsmax turns finds out about this and turns it into the way Obama "stole" the election?

Mojopo November 16, 2012 at 12:17 pm

This whole deal aligns with my fantasy daydream. In it, Anonymous pulled an Ocean's Eleven style job by recoding the software patches Husted authorized in OH, completely unaware that he had approved the installation of a program that destroyed Rove's malware and recovered the real vote, while protecting it on the 6th.

Ducksworthy November 16, 2012 at 12:18 pm

I'll send money to Anonymous if they'll post Clarence Thomas's porn collection on line. But only if its free.

imissopus November 16, 2012 at 12:19 pm

Meh, I think ORCA was probably just as half-assed as the rest of Romney's campaign, which is why it failed, and also that it's getting too much credit for his loss, but I tend to be skeptical of conspiracy theories anyway.

sewollef November 16, 2012 at 1:37 pm

Just because your skeptical of conspiracy theories doesn't mean they're not out to get you.

sati_demise November 16, 2012 at 12:21 pm

What does Bill Gates say about this?

Maybe Apple should be making some voting machines from now on.

deleted8125113 November 16, 2012 at 12:47 pm

I'm just throwing this out there, but dressing up and talking like a cartoon supervillain maybe isn't the best way to convince people that you have any kind of substantive point to make.

Sure, it may seem like a good way to get attention. Ultimately though, you're trying to out-supervillain Karl Rove. You are not Doctor Doom in that scenario, you are Stilt-Man.

SuspectedDemocrat November 16, 2012 at 12:48 pm

That's nothing. For the past year I've been irradiating conservative districts with voter apathy rays from my secret underground lair inside a volcano. And Superstorm Sandy? Obama wants you to think it's his weather machine, but really it was the biggest combined effort of Hollywood special effects teams in history. You're welcome, America.

sewollef November 16, 2012 at 1:39 pm

Hmm…. that 'special effects' 60ft tree that landed on my house begs to differ…..

SuspectedDemocrat November 16, 2012 at 2:29 pm

It was a stunt tree.

Chow Yun Flat November 16, 2012 at 1:00 pm

The real story is that Anonymous was behind the selection of Xi Jinping as new General Secretary of the Chinese Communist Party.

emberglance November 16, 2012 at 1:35 pm

So that's what Karl meant when he said Obama had succeeded by suppressing the vote!

Troglodeity November 16, 2012 at 1:45 pm

Unfortunately, Anonymous screwed up by making those fake Maine voters black.

69WideStance November 16, 2012 at 2:05 pm

This Fox News article reports that Rove couldn't make his computer access county polling data on election night. http://www.foxnews.com/opinion/2012/11/12/what-sa… Rove was finally able to get in just as Fox called Ohio for Romney.

SuspectedDemocrat November 16, 2012 at 2:30 pm

"I'm anonymous and I'm behind everything, everything you do, it's because I decided you were going to do it. Haw haw haw — Mom! We're out of cheetos!"

LibertyLover November 16, 2012 at 3:01 pm

I do like A's opening and closing music… shows a real "Carmina Burana flair."

nealrauhauser November 16, 2012 at 3:27 pm

The Scribd referenced is mine. There is a URL in the description that leads to my blog which has a post about the backstory. About two weeks before the election I was made aware that something was going to happen right as the polls closed on the east coast and they pretty much called it as it happened.

I am working on getting a picture of the envelope the letter came in …

glamourdammerung November 16, 2012 at 4:07 pm

If this was true, it would make a lot more sense to give the evidence to multiple authorities (not necessarily all American ones).

TribecaMike November 16, 2012 at 4:24 pm

I'll believe it when it appears in triplicate.

CommieDad November 16, 2012 at 5:05 pm

I can buy that ORCA was trashed by hackers. A simple DDOS would have done it. I am not so sure about ORCA being a secret vote rigging machine.

barkway November 17, 2012 at 7:59 am

An ORCA worker spilled the beans to Breitbart site about the failures, and just what ORCA was intended to do (assuming he tells the truth, of course) but looks to me like it had nothing to do with vote-rigging ala tampering with vote machines, and more to do with suppression, and GOTV so I don't see how this hack did what it claims to have done since according to the ORCA squealer on Breitbart, it was the failures of the ORCA programmers that made it crash: http://www.breitbart.com/Big-Government/2012/11/0

jello_mold November 16, 2012 at 5:41 pm

ORCA? You're gonna need a bigger vote.

knuck1es November 16, 2012 at 7:38 pm

Bless their hearts, but their announcements sound like they were written by a 14 year old pretending to be Doctor Evil.

Isyaignert November 17, 2012 at 1:14 am

I don't care if Humpty Dumpty is behind the exposing of KKKarl Rove and his evil cabal, what/whoever it is – kudos!!

barkway November 17, 2012 at 7:37 am

Nonsense. They may have interfered with ORCA and prevented GOP thugs from challenging voters but there was no technical link between voting machines & ORCA.

harleymae November 17, 2012 at 6:22 pm

I personally find the very possibility of such guardianship reassuring.There are most certainly far too many possible ways to use our computer dependence against us.As long as these fine folks are on the side of humanity(and police their ranks for provocatuers,the weak link in loose knit organizations)This humble hominid approves.

archie1954 November 17, 2012 at 11:35 pm

I hope they really do send the information to Mr. Assange. I want that criminal Rove to inhabit a cell for the next twenty years.

danielwalldammit November 18, 2012 at 1:53 am

Happy to hear shit about Rove, but yeah, that's a little odd for evidence.

Woodshedding November 18, 2012 at 12:06 pm

Wow. How can people not realize that Anonymous could EASILY do what they're claiming?

Woodshedding November 18, 2012 at 12:28 pm

Rove's machine rigging was done by a well-known hacking technique called Man-in-the-middle, wherein a new bit of software kicks in and changes the program. In the 2004 election, the Ohio system "went down" for a moment and when it came back up, suddenly Kerry's 4.2% lead was flipflopped in Bush's favor. This year, the Ohio system "went down" at precisely the same time. But I'm sure that's just coincidence because conspiracies never happen, and there aren't actually any people who are skillful enough programmers to detect and change other programmers' work.

Woodshedding November 18, 2012 at 12:34 pm

I'm a retired programmer. Trust me, it ain't rocket science and even if it is, there are MANY rocket scientists out there. Wake up Wonketeers. You have swallowed the propaganda known as "conspiracies never happen and it's life-threateningly important to ridicule anyone who says they do." People like Rove just love people like you.

Kate_fate November 18, 2012 at 1:34 pm

Either there are many GOP trolls commenting here, or most Wonketeers seriously need to uninstall their virus software, since they're so sure no one could POSSIBLY modify another party's software from a remote location.

Some seem to believe there aren't any hackers because of the obviously fake ones we see on TV and in movies, who get into a classified database in less time than it takes most of us to remember our OWN passwords.

It's unbelievable that with all the vote-stealing scams we heard about ad nauseum leading up to the election, you guys just can't believe they'd also use computer programming to do their evil! Just because the machines were provided by a member of the Romney family, why in the world would we think they'd use that opportunity in their favor?

And Wonkmomma, I love you dearly but/and hope you ever get another offer to break an important story.

Kate_fate November 18, 2012 at 2:56 pm

From http://www.democraticunderground.com/10021835756: A computer expert named Spoonamore writes:

During the evening and early morning on the 2004 General Election in Ohio, on my own computer I was watching the results of incoming counties and precincts. I believed there was a more than likely chance County Tabulators had been programmed to manipulate votes…. As early results showed Kerry ahead, I noticed a trend in a very few counties (I believe I noted 8 counties on election night) that at about 11 p.m. suddenly began reporting radically different ratios of Kerry to Bush votes. All in favor of Mr. Bush. This sudden rate of change… resembled a fraud technique called an Intelligent Man In the Middle, or KingPin Attack. This type of attack requires a computer to be inserted into the communications flow of an IT system…

Other experts found additional data indicating Bush's increase in votes from these counties, and Kerry's decrease in votes… When information about the SmartTech IT routing switch became public… I again stated that we now have confirmation of a KingPin, or Intelligent Man in the Middle position had been created… The SmartTech system was set up precisely as a KingPin computer used in criminal acts against banking or credit card processes and had the needed level of access to both county tabulators and Secretary of States computers to allow whoever was running SmartTech's computers to decide the output of the county tabulators under its control… The SmartTech computer would as the results of the evening proceeded be able to know how many votes Bush needed to steal from Kerry, and flip enough votes on the desired county tabulators to reverse the outcome of the election…

The aborted testimony of Michael Connell

The SmartTech system that Spoonamore referred to was operated by Michael Connell – “Karl Rove’s IT guru”. Two days after Spoonamore’s affadavit, attorneys filed a motion to compel testimony of Connell regarding his knowledge of the workings of the GOP computer systems. On October 31 a federal judge ordered Connell to submit to a deposition on possible election manipulation. Connell gave the deposition on November 4, providing as little information as possible, but eventually he was forced to admit that “he brought Triad and SmartTech into the Ohio election game”.

When it became apparent that Connell would testify in the case, Connell was warned not to fly his plane. Cliff Arnebeck, the Ohio lawyer who brought the suit and subpoenaed Connell, warned the U.S. Justice Department that Connell’s life might be in danger, and requested witness protection. Connell never did get to testify. On December 19, shortly before he was due to testify, he died in a plane crash, presumably caused by his plane running out of gas."

In case it's news, one of the absolute-most-stressed teachings in flight school is you NEVER LET YOURSELF GET LOW ON GASOLINE.

I think one would need a tinfoil hat to NOT take Anon's claims seriously.

berkeleyfarm November 18, 2012 at 4:40 pm

I dunno. I'm an IT operations pro and based on what I heard about the architecture and rollout for that project, it was pretty much going to be a Fail Whale all by its owneo.

faceshaker November 18, 2012 at 7:55 pm

I note the commercial media tends to refuse to respond when Anonymous makes such announcements. When Anonymous announced a few months ago that they had managed to obtain copies of Romney's tax returns, it was mentioned on MSNBC, but no follow-ups. When Anonymous got into hot water with the Zetas, however, it was all over the news because "everyone knows" the Zetas are the bad guys.

Now this. Media silence. We need evidence.

chestermarx November 18, 2012 at 8:24 pm

Actually we had the same scenario happen in Detroit. Kwame Kilpatrick was losing against Freman Hendrixs, power went out in a couple of precincts, and minutes later, when the power returned, Kwame was leading.

dacktyl November 18, 2012 at 9:18 pm

Thank you, Anonymous!

solrobins6 November 19, 2012 at 12:15 pm

Seriously anon, you were way better when you were doing things that were entertaining, not rabble rabbling about causes and elections and this and that. I want more lulz

opednews November 19, 2012 at 11:16 pm

I don't buy that they got into the ORCA network and saw proof that Rove did something illegal and are choosing to sit on it rather than send copies to NYT, Wapo, AP, Reuters and Wikileaks.

Also, if we believe they got control of the network, who is to say they didn't alter the totals themselves or fudge the whole story? People love entertaining the idea though, so far – almost 70K views here and 23K interested via Opednews so far.

The story was mentioned on Thom Hartmann this afternoon, where I spoke about a parallel incident that really did happen in 2004 when Ken Blackwell secretly gave access to the IT specialists running the Bush campaign. The actual contract and testimony was just unsealed in 2011: http://bradblog.com/Docs/Deposition_MichaelConnel

Can you believe Ken Blackwell is allowed to have a blog at Huffington Post when he still refuses to discuss this contract?

Hartmann reminded us that Smarttech, the same IT firm, was hosting the official White House email correspondence during the lead up to the Iraq War which all went "missing" in violation of the Presidential Records Act. That right there was enough to charge Rove, but Obama, Pelosi and John Conyers wussed out…gus wynn

LibertyLover November 20, 2012 at 1:45 am

If this is true, then Democracy and the citizens of the USA owe Anonymous a great big Thank You! But what of the future? How do we protect the votes of the future? I wish that whatever evidence there is that Rove was doing this is presented to the authorities so that the vote can be protected in it's fullest.

metamarcisf November 20, 2012 at 2:50 pm

Melville has never seemed more relevant.

eggsacklywright November 16, 2012 at 11:30 am

She's a military power-groupie.

Guppy November 16, 2012 at 11:36 am

It may not mean he's not a nerd, but it does mean he has a chance of keeping up with her in bed.

bobbert November 16, 2012 at 12:41 pm

My kids were listening to that for six months before I finally heard the non-airplay version and it made sense.

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