Wingnut Mad, Not Giving ‘Suspected Democrats’ The Pleasure Of His Doubtless Wonderful Company

  revolution never come with a warning

"Neighbors said he seemed like a nice, quiet man who kept to himself."It’s no drunken, chain-smoking 24-minute potty rant, but Eric Dondero, the Libertarian Republican, is having himself too a bit of a snit. He has “soured on electoral politics” and now believes the only recourse is “outright revolt.” And what does Eric Dondero, the Libertarian Republican, suggest you do to anyone you know who is so un-American as to vote for the president of America? Well, first, obviously, tell them to “fuck off and die.” That’s easy! But did you also know that you should cut them off from ever again getting the pleasure of your company, even if it is your wife? (Divorce her.) Or your parents? (Don’t go to Christmas.) Or your boss? (Quit your job.) My my, however will Eric Dondero, the Libertarian Republican’s, Obama-voting friends, bosses, and lovers get along without him?

Express your hatred, shame, and outright disgust with anyone you know who voted Democrat
However, for me, I’m choosing another rather unique path; a personal boycott, if you will. Starting early this morning, I am going to un-friend every single individual on Facebook who voted for Obama, or I even suspect may have Democrat leanings. I will do the same in person. All family and friends, even close family and friends, who I know to be Democrats are hereby dead to me. I vow never to speak to them again for the rest of my life, or have any communications with them. They are in short, the enemies of liberty. They deserve nothing less than hatred and utter contempt

I strongly urge all other libertarians to do the same. Are you married to someone who voted for Obama, have a girlfriend who voted ‘O’. Divorce them. Break up with them without haste. Vow not to attend family functions, Thanksgiving dinner or Christmas for example, if there will be any family members in attendance who are Democrats.

Do you work for someone who voted for Obama? Quit your job. Co-workers who voted for Obama. Simply don’t talk to them in the workplace, unless your boss instructs you too for work-related only purposes. Have clients who voted Democrat? Call them up this morning and tell them to take their business elsewhere’s.

Have a neighbor who votes for Obama? You could take a crap on their lawn. Then again, probably not a good idea since it would be technically illegal to do this. But you could have your dog take care of business. Not your fault if he just happens to choose that particular spot.

And start your boycott of your Democrat friends and family today. Like this morning. First thing you can do, very easy, is to un-friend all Democrats from your Facebook account.

You know, they probably weren’t even sharing your Facebook posts anyway.

[LibertarianRepublican]

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Rebecca is the editor and publisher of Wonkette. She is the author of Commie Girl in the O.C., a collection of her OC Weekly columns, and the former editor of LA CityBeat. Go visit her Commie Girl Collective, and follow her on the Twitter!

View all articles by Rebecca Schoenkopf

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346 comments

    1. actor212

      I'm really hoping this guy checks his Sitemeter or whatever he uses to keep track of his hits and comes over and engages with us.

      Really. I think it would be fun cruel to mock him to his face.

      1. Callyson

        I must be a bad person, because I think it would be hilarious. Come on, Dondero, you know you want to troll…

  1. poorgradstudent

    All family and friends, even close family and friends, who I know to be Democrats are hereby dead to me

    Wait, I thought his goal would be to try to punish them?

      1. poorgradstudent

        I know! I finally made the game! (Although who do I have to blow to get my points to go over 100? Yeesh.)

    1. ButthurtWingers2012

      with this kind of a snit…isn't that like paying him with his own coin? I mean he is a big pussy who can't handle wosing (my apologies to all ladies everywhere, I'd never curse any of you except Bachmann by comparing you to this 'stache). Gee I never thought paranoid racism and demented stupidity would be such a strong emotion for these nutters…but now that I know, hahahahaha :points at them and laughs:

    2. ButthurtWingers2012

      Wait a second, why did my comment get "waiting approval"? All I said is he's a big pussy who can't handle wosing and apologized to all ladies for even momentarilly thinking I'd compare them to this 'stache…what gives, wonkette?

    3. Willardbot9000_V2.5

      okay…I cannot say the p-word so I'll post: wouldn't this be paying him with his own coin since with this snit it's obvious this little bitch can't handle wosing? I thought a major part of being a man is knowing when to lose graciously and admit you're wrong..I guess no one told this chump or wingnuts are just pansies (unlike us liberal guys, ladies). Damn you wonkette for your totalitarianism! Okay…I can never stay mad at Rebecca with her ample chest…

    4. VodkaGoGo

      A libertarian republican pussy is probably a rare and valuable thing, a fuckin' big deal, if you will. Why sully it by fucking a libertarian?

    1. Willardbot9000_V2.5

      No shit…a cave somewhere in the Aleutians where no one will ever have to notice his stupid, fundamentalist lookin' ass.

  2. SmutBoffin

    I suspect that my dog supported Elizabeth Warren. Should I put him to sleep?

    Plz respond ASAP, Mr. Dondero, since I would like to inform him before walkies this evening.

    1. WhatTheHeck

      Boffin, if your dog is female, she is too emotional and can’t be trusted to make the right decisions.

    2. Willardbot9000_V2.5

      My dog made me join dogs against Romney what with the Seamus incident…I guess I'll go get him lethally injected for not knowing his place. My favorite part of this post election fallout is watching wingnuts be reduced to crying blobs of protoplasm. I remember arguing with wingnuts over whether or not Bush was a war criminal (he is) and being told liberals are too 'emotional' (translation: pansies) to understand the issues. God I love watching these people go to emotional pieces…it's touching every bit of joy spots in my brain aside from those which are only reached by sex. But every other joy node? lit the fuck up.

    1. Willardbot9000_V2.5

      Yes…especially when they react to others expressing their free rights and will to vote for the person who best reflects their values (Obama)…truly freedom is only freedom when the result is to this assholes liking. Oh and uh…Dondero, I don't know if you're aware of this or not but you're living in the wrong country. The United States will never turn itself into a Randian dystopia and rejects all attempts to send us that direction (like tossing rich boy wallstreet douche/screech into the trash) so you're obviously wasting your energy. Oh and the countries you named on leaving to…they won't be any more accomodating (as hilarious pasty as all of them are). Why don't you go to Somalia? They lack a central government and I'm sure one of the "Road Warrior" style warlords will be happy to allow a cheery sociopath like you in…cheers, fuckface!

    1. Geminisunmars

      Leave his mother alone — she's already "suffering" enough since he isn't talking to her anymore.

      1. Lascauxcaveman

        She wishes.

        That is, she wishes the little shit would just move out and get his own place already.

    2. RomneysLogCabin

      I hate you.

      Only because I spent about 20 seconds thinking about how you were this nice and gentle nerd whose greatest insult consisted of taking an inconspicuous crap in Ms. Dondero's basement.

      I need some coffee. sigh.

  3. prommie

    Libertarianism really should be listed in the DSMV as a form of personality disorder. "Objectivist" or "Rand Follower" should be inbcluded as alternate names for "sociopath."

    The unique thing about this particular personality disorder is the victim's perverse pride in being afflicted. I mean, its one thing to be afflicted with a personality so fucking obnoxious, but then to be PROUD of your assholishness, to flaunt it as a virtue! Its fucking amazing to me, is what it is.

          1. prommie

            Come on now, manic-depressive people are often very charming (like yourself) and at least they are interesting, umm, dramatic, and who wants to be boring? Thats not a personality disorder, thats a mood disorder. You're fine!

    1. FakaktaSouth

      Just take comfort in their slavish gun fetishism slobbery. Maybe they could all move to one place and practice such.

      1. prommie

        And yet you know, even the fucking "wild west" and that "an armed society is a polite society" crap is all just fucking gibbering idiotic fantasy shit. Fucking Wyatt Earp enforced a strict "No Guns" policy in Dodge City. Fucking gun control, in the fucking wild west. These fucking people are proudly ignorant too, not just proudly obnoxious.

      2. Willardbot9000_V2.5

        Wingnuts are so fucking predictable…on my homepage: "stocks in gun suppliers soar with Obama victory"

    2. Willardbot9000_V2.5

      Sociopath/immature teenager. It's funny because the Rand Venn seems to always occur when an individual is a teenager: they are growing into adulthood but a lot of childish selfishness remains. A lot of teens become Randites during this period…then they attend college, mature a bit and if applied critical thinking occurs they shitcan Rand because her philosophy was puerile and LOADED with blindspots and problems. Only those who never actually mature fail to apply critical thinking to Rand and therefore they become assholes like…this guy and Screetch Ryan. The only thing I believe that could slap him out of this is either a concussion (from a fist) or actually having to LIVE with the negative implications of his 'philosophy'. Being poor and deprived sure does make a person understand why a fucking bitch like Rand was a fucking bitch. In other words, may you be blessed many times with enlightenment; oh and on your road to enlightenment may you qualify for EBT benefits, too…you may be a completely selfish and self centered prig asshole but in our society we take care of each other or else we don't have a society at all.

      1. prommie

        Fucking APES live in cooperative groups, for the love of god. There has never been a moment in the existence of humanity when we did not live in cooperative, sharing, mutual support groups. Yes, within societies there is competition for dominance and a greater share, sure, but that struggle is within the framework of a mutually dependant cooperative society. Randian-Libertarian ideas of the individual being completely totally free and sacrosanct are simply fucking retarded, ignorant, stupid, and pathologogical. Even under fuedalism, even under kings, there was a moral belief that the king owed, fucking owed, an obligation to those under him. This libertarian randian shit is just beyond anything in human history.

  4. slithytoves

    This post-election is like an apartment I rented in Chicago. The exterminator would spray around the kitchen and bathroom and we would watch the cockroaches come scrambling out of the walls in a dying frenzy.

  5. axonneuron

    The ultimate in self-centered idiocy. "I will deprive you of my company, which you will obviously miss (who wouldn't?) ."

  6. weejee

    I was hoping the Rethugs would show the world how to throw a snit and hold their collective</stride> individual private property breath until at least next Tuesday.

    ♪♫ Blue, blue, my world is blue, tra la, tra la ♫♪

    1. Willardbot9000_V2.5

      I can almost guarantee they have…or they're family members and choose to endure his bullshit out of love and loyalty, neither of which he deserves. He's the kind of asshole who gets completely self absorbed and jealous to the point of hatred when attending someone else's special event because everyone isn't paying attention to and giving homage to him…he just screams it. But yeah…on facebook I can almost guarantee the first time he passed around a horribly racist image of the President every Democratic person on his list defriended him…he screams that, too.

    1. Kid_Charlemagne

      Sounds like the libertarian who told me that the federal government couldn't regulate him because he did not engage in "interstate commerce" because he only bought things in his own state. "Nevermind", I said.

        1. Generation[redacted]

          And he yelled at the dealer for an hour because he didn't want to pay extra for seat belts he didn't need anyway.

          1. Biel_ze_Bubba

            Regulations are a wonderful thing. Ever see the crash test between a modern car that meets Federal safety rules, and a '59 Chevy (the sort of car the teabaggers insist were so great, before the gubmin't messed everything up)?

          2. glamourdammerung

            I knew a Libertarian that screamed at me once about how seatbelt laws were unconstitutional because it was "involuntary confinement". I wish I was making that up.

            They later tried to scream about how the 17th Amendment was unconstitutional as well and threw an epic tantrum when the obvious logical disconnect was pointed out.

        2. CommieLibunatic

          I guess I've taken it for granted and only knew it on a kind of knee-jerk level, but I never knew quantitatively how bad those old cars were. Just look at how the cabin reacts, how it almost looks like a bomb went off in the Bel Air; compared to that, the scene in the Malibu is almost boring.

          Seriously, the Bel Air driver's corpse would have to be removed with a crowbar, but the Malibu driver might have gotten a broken foot.

      1. SorosBot

        Hey I'm doing that already! But it's because they suck, not because accept EBT payments which only an insane business that qualifies would refuse.

        1. James Michael Curley

          I checked once. IIRC SNAP EBT Cards charge the grocer 0% for use and impose no annual fees. I use a brokerage debit card which charges 4.5% and, issued by VISA, imposes a sliding annual fee where the more the grocer accepts it the more his annual fee is. It would be plainly idiotic and bad business with the insanely narrow ROR that a grocer has to narrow it even more by refusing to accept SNAP.

  7. SpiderCrab

    Darn. I was so looking forward to spending many merry evenings basking in the glow of this inimitable chap. Oh well. C'est la vie.

  8. UnholyMoses

    I volunteer to tell this assface and anyone like him that I voted for Obama right after I got a tramp stamp tattoo of Lenin, Marx, Stalin, and Hitler playing Ring Around the Aborted Fetus.

  9. sewollef

    This is two unhinged Conservatives in the space of 50 pixels…. I'm liking Thursday on Wonkette.

    Can we have more please Beccs?

    1. Respitetini

      Google something called "White People Mourning Romney". It's a Tumblr, which the kids tell me is hep, or something. You're welcome.

  10. SmutBoffin

    NO, this is NOT how it is supposed to work! If you hate libruls, you Go Galt; you don't give everybody the silent treatment.

  11. SorosBot

    And from the author, in the comments…

    "I disowned them this morning. On Facebook and through an email. But fortunately my parents are diehard Republicans, and a sister. It's only the fucked up brother in Delaware, piece of shit, scumbag mother fucker who is a Democrat, and another sister in Philly who won't tell me, but I'm almost certain voted for Obama.

    They are dead to me now. And I will not under any circumstances attend their funerals in 30 or 40 years.

    Harsh, but a reality. "

    And the US is now apparently just like Germany in 1935. Really I would not be surprised if this guy goes and shoots up a crowd in a few days; brr. (And I'm not even done the first page of comments!)

  12. UnholyMoses

    I will deprive you of my company, which you will obviously miss (who wouldn't?)

    :: raises hand ::

    1. UnholyMoses

      HandsMagnifying glasses and tweezers up everyone who believes that Eric Dondero has a microscopically small penis.

      Fixorated

  13. BadKitty904

    Presumably, his next "political statement" will consist of holding his breath 'til he turns blue and/or taking his ball and going home.

  14. SayItWithWookies

    Break up with them without haste.

    If Mr. Dondero and his syntactically-challenged mind go galt, I know of at least one repercussion — things will mean what they're supposed to mean.

  15. MissTaken

    Starting early this morning, I am going to un-friend every single individual on Facebook who voted for Obama, or I even suspect may have Democrat leanings.

    What about the Twitter?

    1. SorosBot

      And how does he know who has Democrat [sic] leanings? "Are you know, or have you ever been, a WELFARE MOOCHER NAZI?"

      1. BigSkullF*ckingDog

        Well, if they're brown for start. Or look like they have a case of te gay. Or went to college.

  16. actor212

    You could take a crap on their lawn. Then again, probably not a good idea since it would be technically illegal to do this. But you could have your dog take care of business. Not your fault if he just happens to choose that particular spot.

    Errrr, first, it's ILLEGAL, not technically, to trespass and take a crap on your neighbor's lawn.

    And it is TECHNICALLY illegal to let your dog do it with foreknowledge, yes.

    1. SorosBot

      Indeed, in many if not most neighborhoods it's illegal to not clean up the dog's shit after it goes in public or on someone else's property. But I supposed that's just as fascist as having to wear a seat belt!

  17. BigSkullF*ckingDog

    Please. I'm sure the Dems in your life would be fucking eccstatic if you did this. And the non dems would be begging you to shun them as well.

  18. Q_R_DeNameland

    Oddly enough, I kind of wish I knew this guy, so that I could relish the realization that I would never have to interact with him again.

          1. CommieLibunatic

            I was thinking of the first Bioshock (before Sofia Lamb went all collectivist on us). Imagine my horror when Ron Paul fans floated the idea of establishing an ocean platform nation, founded on gold, guns, and Freedom (to fuck people over).

  19. actor212

    Vow not to attend family functions, Thanksgiving dinner or Christmas for example, if there will be any family members in attendance who are Democrats.

    FOX has a bit of a programming opportunity here. Perhaps they can show a Reagan film festival to all those poor lonely old men eating microwaved chili in their underwear…

  20. savethispatient

    This actually makes sense: a man who doesn't believe in society elects to remove himself from it.

    1. Isyaignert

      It makes perfect sense to me. IMHO anyone who voted for Rmoney is stupid, or a rich fukker and/or a racist. The country would be so much better off without them. I hope they all move to fukkin' Somalia where they can see what no gummint looks like up close and personal.

      Frankly, I was planning to organize an annual BBQ now that all of the houses in our rural cul-de-sac are built and occupied, but after seeing two Rmoney signs and a couple of anti-gay marriage (prop 74), I said – fuk it – I don't want to be their friend.

  21. Goonemeritus

    I know saying their tears taste like wine is kind of a cliché but they really do. After four years of their bullshit claims about how America feels about our President this election has made my year.

    1. Dumbedup

      that, and the fact that they are realizing that all the bullshit they so fervently believed was just…bulshit, all of it…and now need a new worldview. It's like divine justice.

  22. Mumbletypeg

    Seems like a defeatist retreat strategy for a warrior for justice and the American way. I mean without friend'ing the enemy on Facebook you can no longer Poke them, which I thought was the point.

  23. SorosBot

    Oh Randroids, please don't go Galt; we'll be so sad when you run off and leave us alone, really, it's the absolute worst thing you can do to the liberals in America, really, we would all hate it so much.

      1. IceCreamEmpress

        I will certainly give this dude a dead rat on a string, but no way am I showing him my sore toe.

  24. actor212

    It's only the fucked up brother in Delaware, piece of shit, scumbag mother fucker who is a Democrat, and another sister in Philly who won't tell me, but I'm almost certain voted for Obama.

    And my dog. And my dog's fleas. And the grass down in the park. Damn grass…GET OFF MY LAWN, YOU KIDS!

  25. Jus_Wonderin

    "Facebook had enormous power and reach in the early 21st century. In fact, most anthropologists believe social networking was at its height by late 2020. Though, the trend was not to be sustained as users found more interactive means of connecting with others of like mind.

    Thus, the new Stone Age can be considered to have begun in 2021 with many stones being thrown. Ruins of stake pits can be found in nearly every lawn (editors note: a lawn was a great expanse of hallowed, green vegetation planted by those of this previous millennium as decoration near and sometime surrounding their primitive living structures).'

    Excerpted from "Remnants of the By-gones: The Certain Stupidity of our Distant Ancestors" Gorgon Press, 3159.

    1. SmutBoffin

      "The Author of 'Remants', perhaps in possession of a malfunctioning neuronal facilitator, asserts the primacy of the masturbation-aide Facebook in initiating The Collapse, yet ignores the contribution of the primitive insult-disseminator called, cryptically, Twitter."

      - from the New New York Times Review of Books, Mittsday, July 11, 3159

  26. BlueStateLibel

    I'm not really convinced any of these types of people HAVE girlfriends or wives they could actually leave. But it's a hell of a payback anyway!

    1. widestanceromance

      Not only does this guy have a girlfriend, he carries her receipt in his wallet to show people.

  27. SoBeach

    All the high school knobs I haven't spoken with in 20 years used to fill the facebooks with nutbag rants all the time. They've been eerily silent since Tuesday. I was actually looking forward to them sharing their butthurt, but I got zippo.

    Have they all un-friendified me? That would really hurt my feelings.

    1. SuspectedDemocrat

      Same here! But I suspect mine are genuinely tired of arguing and hating on everything, and have found better things to do with their lives. At least I hope so.

    2. Sassomatic

      I had one from elementary school saying that anyone receiving unemployment should not be allowed to vote. She seemed to believe that everyone who voted for Obama does not have a job. I asked if she truly believed the unemployment rate was 49%. I was unfriended and blocked. I had no idea she was batshit insane until that moment.

  28. UnholyMoses

    This is the era that social scientists 30 years from now will call "The Great Butthurtening."

    It really does feel like we're reaching Peak Wingnut as well, don't it?

    1. BadKitty904

      I genuinely had no idea, 'til now, that we had *this* many bitter, immature, "reality-challenged" people in this country. USA! USA!

      1. SorosBot

        Yeah, I knew some of them would lose it but not that it would be this extreme. It's probably because of Fox "News", the UnSkewed Polls and the rest of the echo chamber; this time around, unlike 2008 many of the right-wingers actually managed to convince themselves that a Romney was nearly inevitable, despite the fact that all the polls (except Rasmussen) said otherwise.

        They lied to themselves to the point that the scary black Obama's win was a total shock, even though it should not have been if they had actually paid attention to the real news instead of just the fake alternate reality they created.

        1. Geminisunmars

          You are asking an awful lot of them, if you think they should have paid attention to reality.

    2. mayor_quimby

      You have a way with words, I hope that makes it into the history books, in bluesa, after the coming civil war.

    3. ChapterUndVerse

      I think Peak Wingnut is like the stock market; you can never reach the peak of anything as abstract as collective psychosis, can you?

  29. MLite

    The comments are even better. From the author, displaying the true depth of his political thinkery: "That said, on Romney I think you're dead wrong. He was the ideal candidate for Republicans. We couldn't have done any better. Good looking, hot lookin' wife. Well spoken. Fiscal not social conservative. Northeast ties, also from the Mid-west. It's almost like he came out of central casting.

    1. SorosBot

      Picking a candidate because he looked like a President worked very well for the Republicans before with Harding!

      1. Negropolis

        Exactly. What a president "looks like" has been changed, forever, as was all the bullshit conventional wisdom (i.e. such-and-such has never won with unemployment this high). If they would have accepted this fact, they'd have been far less shallow about who they pikced.

      1. Geminisunmars

        Well, you did vote for Obama, didn't you? And I'm sure it was just that he has a "hot wife" that made you do it. Right?

        1. Jus_Wonderin

          OK. You got me. But I voted for Clinton too. And will I love Hillz, I put her in the brainy wife category for which I also vote.

  30. SorosBot

    If Eric is being honest about this, it's shocking if he hasn't gotten slapped in public yet, many many times:

    "When I'm at the Wal-mart or grocery story I typically pay with my debit card. On the pad it comes up, "EBT, Debit, Credit, Cash." I make it a point to say loudly to the check-out clerk, "EBT, what is that for?" She inevitably says, "it's government assistance." I respond, "Oh, you mean welfare? Great. I work for a living. I'm paying for my food with my own hard-earned dollars. And other people get their food for free." And I look around with disgust, making sure others in line have heard me. "

      1. BadKitty904

        OK, that's the second time today you guys have made me snarf tea all over my keyboard. Cut it out.

        1. Jus_Wonderin

          Hey! You are reaching your Tea Snarf limit. Though, you are allowed to borrow a snarf from the snarf impaired.

    1. elviouslyqueer

      And I look around with disgust, making sure others in line have heard me.

      "It's okay, sweetheart. We'll make sure to complete our transaction without making eye contact with the scary, shouty, crazy man."

    2. Jus_Wonderin

      Quit holding up the line you bombastic fuckwad. My gogurt has an expiration date, for fuck's sake.

      1. SorosBot

        It's even more assholish, if that's possible, when you remember that the vast majority of Wal-Mart employees, of every race, receive EBT benefits because the company pays shit, not enough to live on, and the company knows this and encourages the employees to register.

    3. prommie

      Slapped? Just fucking slapped? Dude makes me very stabby. With votes, of course. Throat-punchy, too, but also, with votes!

    1. SorosBot

      "If this election proves one thing, it is that the Old America is gone. And, sad for the world, it is not coming back."

      Considering that the Old America this guy longs for is one in which the government neglects its' responsibility to take care of its citizens, let's hope he's right.

      Once again, HA HA!

  31. MacRaith

    Isn't this sort of like when a kindergartener threatens someone by saying "I won't be your friend any more"? Probably just as effective, too.

  32. mrblifil

    He and NSFW Lady should get together as an experiment to see if their recessive traits will create hominids with the barest intelligence to operate a TV remote.

    1. Jus_Wonderin

      If we get US manufacturing up and going again, we will need those offspring to clean the factory waste tubes. I bet they fit in just fine, given the tiny size of their craniums.

  33. WhatTheHeck

    And, goddamnit, if you know anyone who is associated with the Wonkette, then cut their bar tab off. Pronto. Cause that’ll hurt them, real bad.

    1. Yellerdawg

      Hush, damn it! The walls have ears!

      Eh, Never mind. There's no Republican bartenders in Austin.

    1. calliecallie

      OMG, we should all do that. I am looking him up on facebook right now! I bet he doesn't even really have facebook friends.

      1. BigSkullF*ckingDog

        Okay. Truth time. I sent the request and then came back to wonkette and looked at his pic and a chill ran down my spine at the thought of that guy knowing ANY personal info about me. So I quickly undid it. Fucking with nutjobs is not worth having a potential psychopath knowing where I work. Also, I don't have a big ginger haired man to protect me, just a big ginger haired dog.

        1. emmelemm

          Yeah, for realsies. Also why I'm not on the Facebook.

          Big ginger haired dog still = good protection.

  34. SexySmurf

    I'm now single, friendless, unemployed and have "public defecation" on my criminal record.

    Take that, Obama!

  35. Troglodeity

    Oh, great: someone whose life goal is to make shopping at Walmart even LESS enjoyable:

    "When I'm at the Wal-mart or grocery story I typically pay with my debit card. On the pad it comes up, "EBT, Debit, Credit, Cash." I make it a point to say loudly to the check-out clerk, "EBT, what is that for?" She inevitably says, "it's government assistance." I respond, "Oh, you mean welfare? Great. I work for a living. I'm paying for my food with my own hard-earned dollars. And other people get their food for free." And I look around with disgust, making sure others in line have heard me. I am going to step this up. I am going to do far more of this in my life. It's going to be my personal crusade."

      1. glamourdammerung

        So his personal crusade is to be a loudmouth asshole?

        Yeah, they already said they were a "Libertarian". You know that group of Republicans that are too embarrassed to admit they are members of the Republican Party.

    1. WootInTarnation

      Lil' Mister Pouty Puss s gonna hafta stop patronizing Walmart for their low-low prices, since all those bargains can be offered because of beneficial trade agreements negotiated by the, *gasp* gubbermint.

      'Sides, isn't he the type who's supposed to luff this country more passionately than anyone else? USA! USA! Small business! Individualism! Initiative! Shopping at Walmart spits in the face of all of those ideals. But I'll be surprised when I meet a Randian libertarian who isn't a hypocrite.

  36. kyeshinka

    Why doesn't he just stand in the street shouting "USA USA USA?" It normally solves every other problem in the world.

  37. notreelyhelping

    Ah, but the real fun begins when the true believers start judging the other true believers on whether or not they're sufficiently true believers. And, you know, if they aren't….

  38. calliecallie

    "But you could have your dog take care of business."

    I keep trying to get my dog to shit on the neighbor's lawn, for non-political reasons, and she just won't do it. So I don't see how this will work.

  39. kyeshinka

    Ha! Jokes on you, friend. Christmas has been cancelled this year because that's what democrats do!

  40. calliecallie

    "You know, they probably weren’t even sharing your Facebook posts anyway."

    I automatically went to click the like button for this line, but it wasn't there, because it was part of the post. Good one!

  41. kittensdontlie

    Eric Dondero is getting new Facebook friends!
    (entry on his Facebook page) I think you may have made a couple miscalculations in your plan. It seems you neglected to account for how large of an asshole you are. I'm guessing losing your " friendship" won't be seen as a great loss. And ironically, the impossibility of having you as a "friend" mighy actual create some new democrats. Well done!!!! Please, do continue to be a douche of the highest order.

  42. natl_[redacted]_cmdr

    I recommend this man stop using government roads because: Welfare! Build your own damn road, moocher!

  43. LotsOfRats

    He's suggesting that his right-wing followers decamp to "Costa Rica, Switzerland, Italy, Argentina, Hong Kong, Israel."

    Can't wait until anyone who follows his advice discovers just how much English is spoken in those nations.

    1. MosesInvests

      And Israel has universal healthcare, and a *lot* of brown people. Subsidies for basic foods, also, too.

  44. ringletwraith

    This is the feel good story of the day. This gentleman has taken his disappointment at the outcome of the election and turned his negative feelings into positive action by performing a community service.

  45. Guppy

    And when ye come into an house, salute it.

    And if the house be worthy, let your peace come upon it: but if it be not worthy, let your peace return to you.

    And whosoever shall not receive you, nor hear your words, throw an absolute shite-fit and defecate on thy neighbor's porch.

  46. synykyl

    Oh no! Eric Dondero has unfriended me! This is even worse than when my hemmorrhoids suddenly cleared up.

  47. Poindexter718

    I have someone in mind for Eric to spend the holidays with in lieu of his extended family. She likes to spend cozy evenings at home drinking buttershots, eating dip and ranting and she totally checks out on the political front.

  48. lulzmonger

    "This is it! Now you've done it – this means WAR! War as in 'flouncing like a motherfucker,' sheeple! Look everyone, I'm gonna flounce SO FUCKING HARD! Yes, I'm doing it! I'm really doing it! I'm FLOUNCING! See? I TOLD you I was hardcore! Bwa hah hah haaaaa!"

    … & nothing of value was lost.

  49. ChrisM2011

    At least standard Republicans embrace their stupidity. Libertarians are dumb Republicans that think they're Mensa candidates.

  50. Biel_ze_Bubba

    I've long thought that Beck, Limpballs, and their fellow hate-radio jackasses have some sort of organic brain disease. Now I'm beginning to suspect that it's contagious.

  51. ElPinche

    Crap on my lawn please!! Saves me $80 for two bags of fucking Scotts Winterizer fertilizer. $40 a bag?!

  52. Blueb4sinrise

    A recommendation of sorts……….

    Mark Elam, [Ron] Paul's spokesman at the time, referred to Dondero as "looney-tunes"

    1. SuspectedDemocrat

      Someone should tell him, and ask what brand computer he's using. Pretty much the entire tech industry, really. PC stands for People's Computer, comrade!

  53. DahBoner

    They hadn’t even shot the Archduke Ferdinand yet!

    Is that a threat or a promise?

    P.S. Gary Johnson got ONE MILLION VOTES plus weed.

  54. T3rbo

    This proves that every right winger has the emotional and intellectual maturity level of a pre-teen. I'm running away, FOREVER, and NONE OF YOU ARE MY FRIENDS (waaahhh!!!)
    Now, Eric, you can run away AFTER you eat all of your salad. No getting up from the table until them
    NO! I HATE YOU! WAAAAHHHH! I'M GONNA POOP ON THE LAWN!

    1. bobbert

      Wow. I read a couple of comments and followed a couple links. So the guy's real (or, perhaps, original) name is Eric Rittberg, and Paultards HATE him.

    2. ChapterUndVerse

      Wow, also too. Abridged quote: "Ron likes Bobby personally, and after the speech Bobby came up to Ron with his hand extended; Ron literally swatted his hand away."

      See, it wasn't a hand, it was the approach of a possibly HIV-positive vehicle of infection. And he's an oldz, so it's understandable that he'd be uncomfortable, and excuses must be made, because freedom. People shouldn't be so thin-skinned.

  55. joshleefolsom

    It's so fucking hilarious, and I'm not convinced it's real. It's too Andy Kaufmann. Then again the comments seem real. I wonder if his bumper sticker says "Proud To Be An Asshole"?

    1. T3rbo

      Oh, it's FUCKING REAL. This guy is never going to shop at a supermarket again (EBT WELFARE MOOCHING BLAHS!), and he is going to start yelling nonsense about slavery and Obama's islamo-fascism at the Library. Next thing you know, poof, the entire Senate uh gives up (?) and we all go Galt.

  56. smashedinhat

    My advice is to always eat a pickle or chunk of black bread after that vodka shot. It will at least delay the stupid.

  57. widestanceromance

    Looks like the guy shopping for "a larger freezer", that you quickly leave a store to avoid.

  58. joshleefolsom

    I love this one from the other site's comments: "Have you considered fighting for freedom by holding your breath until you turn blue?"

  59. Rowen

    What happened to the good old days when people like this would just drop off the grid and try to open a compound where they would engage in subsistence farming for 2-5 years before realizing it's hard work and they like having things like highways and sewage systems?

    1. GeorgiaBurning

      Young crazies today just don't know how good they have it with this internet thingy. They can post loon blogs and still keep a job working security at Park and Fly.

  60. Tommy1733

    Seriously – there are apparently a lot of people in America whose delusional thinking is positively amazing. I mean this guy and many others are just out of touch. How did they get to be this way? This is really not natural, or at least I would like to think it is not. Is this normal politics?

  61. mustangsavvy

    OMFG. Epic meltdown of the YEAR.

    "I strongly urge all other libertarians to do the same. Are you married to someone who voted for Obama, have a girlfriend who voted ‘O’. Divorce them. Break up with them without haste. Vow not to attend family functions, Thanksgiving dinner or Christmas for example, if there will be any family members in attendance who are Democrats."

    And all his Democratic friends & family break out the champers in JOY and CELEBRATION!

    What a wanker =) A hilarious idiotic wanker who just TOTES made me day =)

  62. Weenus299

    "Break up with them without haste."

    Do it very slowly, annoyingly, over the course of a thousand years.

  63. mustangsavvy

    I give it 3 days before he gets lonely and re-friends his Dem friends because they always have the good beer and weed.

  64. pdiddycornchips

    Like any true Libertarian, he is very upset about the ten day waiting period for the purchase of hand guns, He's angry NOW DAMNIT!!!

  65. Cheburashka64

    When my son acts like this (not all that often anymore since he turned 6) I suggest that he go to his room until he calms down, and mention that while everyone feels that way sometimes, if he acts that way around others he will get in trouble. I'm guessing he'll come downstairs and ask us for a hug in a few minutes.

  66. ravi_shankar

    My dog poops on republican-only yards and has since she was a wee pup.

    Is that like going Galt? Please advise.

  67. SuspectedDemocrat

    He is considering moving to the libertarian state of Monaco.

    I've been there. It's nice. You can spend 100 euros on lunch, but it's nice.

    1. SorosBot

      http://www.europe-cities.com/en/633/monaco/health

      Monaco has an excellent standard of compulsory state funded healthcare. Medical staff are extremely well trained and healthcare in Monaco is available to all citizens, registered long-term residents and those citizens from France and Italy who can prove that they have paid their healthcare contributions in one of these countries.

  68. Incitefully_Joe

    If all the asshole right-wing pretend-libertarians-who-are-somehow-worse-than-actual-libertarians-because-they-still-love-war-and-torture-and-hate-immigrants were to collectively decide to "Go Galt" from my life, why, I… I think I could be okay with that honestly.

  69. Incitefully_Joe

    All family and friends, even close family and friends, who I know to be Democrats are hereby dead to me. [...]I strongly urge all other libertarians to do the same. Are you married to someone who voted for Obama, have a girlfriend who voted ‘O’. Divorce them. Break up with them without haste

    Objection! This rant is riddled with unfounded assumptions, like the notion that right-wing faux-libertarians have friends or family that love them, or are able to convince women to have sex with them, ever.

  70. owhatever

    He seems upset that 'Mericans voted, as our Four Found Fathers wanted us to do. I hold up one purple-tipped finger to acknowledge him.

  71. Vontzi

    I am sure the 1 friend that he has was irate at finding out that he would not be actually unfriended

  72. woolmyn

    He's Eric Dondero Rittberg on Facebook. There were some other Eric Dondero's with Facebook pages. Sure feel sorry for them!

  73. Dashboard Buddha

    "Not your fault if he just happens to choose that particular spot."

    Here in my neck of the woods, we pick up neighbor's dog shit…and return it to the owners.

  74. Jennyjen798

    This is kind of hilarious and hits close to home. Just yesterday I made an epic facebook thread that will probably end up on failbook at some point, but it started with me dropping knowledge on my republican welfare queen of a sister's facebook status. She and her government sucking friends, who hate that other people suck from the government teet of course, just couldn't handle it. Good riddance, I won't have to deal with the tea tard brain farts again!

  75. GeneralLerong

    "And I look around with disgust, making sure others in line have heard me. I am going to step this up. I am going to do far more of this in my life. It's going to be my personal crusade."

    Walmart being the kinda place it is, sooner or later someone is then going to follow him outside. Someone large and cranky, I'm guessing, with hands like hams. Or small and psycho. And then a discussion will ensue.

  76. comrad_darkness

    "or I even suspect may have Democrat leanings"

    Oh goodie goodie goodie, it's been centuries since the right had a really good witch hunt.

  77. woodwakr

    You know, Eric, that's a great idea! Since I read your words and learned that that behavior is A-OK, this morning I fired six guys in the woodshop I own in Baltimore, because they voted for Romney. My new help-wanted posters will say "No Romney voters need apply."

    And i've changed my pricing too: Republicans will be billed at a rate twice that of Democrats. Tea Partiers, three times as much.

    Thanks for your example; I would never have thought of it myself!

  78. Sassomatic

    "I am going to un-friend every single individual on Facebook who voted for Obama"

    Hell hath no fury like a 14-year-old girl.

  79. Sassomatic

    Yes, let all of them follow this advice, so that half the country hate the other half. That turned out well the last time.

  80. nanooknw

    This is totally ridiculous. Why doesn't he just lie down and kick his feet.
    They are looking for someone to write his blog as he is too upset to continue.
    Anyone up for that?

  81. Wile E. Quixote

    "So yeah officer, there I was, just minding my own business when Dondero came out of his house, pantsless and screaming about the Democrats, ran across the street and took a shit on my lawn. Then he started jumping up and down and screaming and asking me what I was going to do about it, and telling me that we weren't going to be Facebook friends any more and that's when I stood my ground and pumped a clip of Hydrashoks™ into his chest."

  82. NellCote71

    Just hoping some of my wing nut family members take his advice so I don't have to come up with the 18th million excuse for avoiding Thanksgiving dinner.

  83. grex1949

    And, since when do people with property (Donald Trump?) call for "revolution"? Be careful what you wish for, dumb ass.

  84. onemoretime79

    Now, I know, what it feelslike to say – I just washed my brain in bleach. Followed the links; Kept waiting for the punchline. It never came. Apparently there is two or three of them, there.

    I used to live in Houston. I still have friends in Houston…and this guy is no Sam Houston. He does not represent Houston. Houston doesn't deserve this. Can someone who's there, take care of this?

    CreepyD: " I live in Houston, Texas. Name the time and place. I will gladly meet you and spit on the ground in front of you. Here's my cell 979-848-4575. Call me or text me with a time and place. I do travel. So, I could meet you somewhere's else in the U.S."

  85. ChapterUndVerse

    I just listened to Shelly, and now this…I had no idea so many conservatives were secretly Amish. I haz a sad, but like a mature adult, I will rise to the challenge of being shunned by these fine people.

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