ONE OF US ONE OF US  9:07 am November 8, 2012

Mitt Romney’s Transition Website Was Live An Entire Day After He Lost, Because He Is Terrible At Politics

by Rebecca Schoenkopf

bullet dodgedO hai Romney transition website developer! Did you know that if you have a website you do not yet want people to see yet, you can hide it? Like, you could put up a splash page that says “coming soon,” with kittens with googly eyes, or you could just have it in development pages and not actually published to the Internet! We do not blame you, web development is hard! You know: UNLESS IT IS YOUR JOB TO DEVELOP THE WEB. Here are some screenshots of the Romney transition website, which unaccountably was live for the whole Internet (but especially Taegan Goddard at Political Wire) to see! It was here an entire day after Miffed “47 percent” Romney shit the electoral bed! We especially like the ones we are gonna show you after the jump!

We are not saying Mitt Romney should not have had someone working on a transition website! It is important to have your ducks in a row! It is just that, as with every other single thing on his campaign, they did a piss-poor job, and now we have no choice but to laugh at them. MITT ROMNEY WHY ARE YOU SO BAD AT THIS?

This “Join the Administration” page is the funniest one. Like, did you know it is not always awesome buying yourself a cabinet position or whatever?

Wait a minute, what did it just say?

Hahaha, it said you have to show your taxes and stuff. AS IF! From now on, no presidential candidate will ever have to show her taxes, due to the precedent set by Mr. Senor Romney, unless of course she actually would like to win.

[PoliticalWire]

 
Related video

Hola wonkerados.

To improve site performance, we did a thing. It could be up to three minutes before your comment appears. DON'T KEEP RETRYING, OKAY?

Also, if you are a new commenter, your comment may never appear. This is probably because we hate you.

{ 221 comments }

smitallica November 8, 2012 at 9:10 am

To borrow a tagline from the movie "Thirteen Days":

You'll Never Believe How Close We Came.

boskolives November 8, 2012 at 9:18 am

I've also heard that line in a porn, too.

ChillBill November 8, 2012 at 9:22 am

That's what Ann said.

actor212 November 8, 2012 at 9:45 am

Her?

(just think, that may officially be the last time I can use that joke)

Chet Kincaid_ November 8, 2012 at 9:46 am

I'm looking forward to ignoring the movie!

flipdraw November 8, 2012 at 9:13 am

I wondered whatever happened to the tax bizniz. Better put some still-being-paid staffer to the task of filing that amended return!

AlterNewt November 8, 2012 at 9:13 am

I was really hoping to land a cushy statue-draping job.

FakaktaSouth November 8, 2012 at 9:30 am

I'm still hoping to be Ann's ugly shirt (or face) draper. Someone should do SOMETHING to cover that SOON.

AlterNewt November 8, 2012 at 9:41 am

That bird shirt should fetch an easy $35.00 at the campaign-expenditure-off-set yard sale.

PugglesRule November 8, 2012 at 9:48 am

I would pay $35 just to own that bird shirt so I could publicly burn it… but not until I scraped off the gold leaf or whatever it was that made it "worth" $990. Hideous!

MosesInvests November 8, 2012 at 11:39 am

IMHO, it's not Egg's face that's ugly-she's actually quite pretty. HOWEVER, the sneering contempt for the peasantry that was the source of her usual facial expression really uglified her.

PsycWench November 8, 2012 at 9:47 am

A good job would be to take a hint from the post-election McCain office and scrub the electronic devices before yardsaling them.

Chichikovovich November 8, 2012 at 10:26 am

If I remember correctly, the Romney people did that after they left the Massachusetts governorship. Wiped all the harddrives etc. Which was not legal since they were not his property but rather that of the Commonwealth of Massachusetts. But the modern Republican party is the party of "I'm going to do it, and I know damn well you won't prosecute it."

So I have a feeling that the operation you describe is well under way.

HELisforHEL November 8, 2012 at 10:34 am

They could call Rose Mary Woods for some bad advice, if she weren't dead.

glasspusher November 8, 2012 at 10:36 am

Yes, my bro in Mass told me that Mitt's crew bought the hard drives from his admin when they could and destroyed them!

larrykat November 8, 2012 at 10:17 am

Has anyone spoken for the Oil Annointer position yet?

NYNYNYjr November 8, 2012 at 4:38 pm

I was all ready to start a new business pulling down the huge marble statues of Obama from all the city squares and recycling them into tiles for the presidential bathroom of Romney's New White House. What do I do with Fastobamastatueremoval.com now?

Tealiban November 8, 2012 at 9:14 am

Someone needs to start a Tumblr called Mittens Kittens that is full of pictures of cats telling Miffed that's ok to be a loser.

PugglesRule November 8, 2012 at 9:49 am

Awwwww….

Grief_Lessons November 8, 2012 at 9:14 am

If you're going to be bad at campaining, you should at least be good at losing.

Lot_49 November 8, 2012 at 9:44 am

Which he most distinctly was not–his "concession" PowerPoint/elevator speec h invited everyone to pray for Obama but didn't promise to help. Message: that guy's fucked. Everybody start praying.

Grief_Lessons November 8, 2012 at 10:02 am

Whatever, it's all transitional while W.A.S.T.E. ;)

Lot_49 November 8, 2012 at 10:05 am

Didn't I tell you not to mention that here? Use the other internet!

EatFrankRich November 8, 2012 at 10:27 am

If you lost your password, look under the underpass at the San Narcisco exit, eh?

Loch_Nessosaur November 8, 2012 at 9:14 am

But he looks so presidential.

ph7 November 8, 2012 at 9:34 am

so traditionally presidential.

BadKitty904 November 8, 2012 at 9:45 am

In a stock-photo sorta way…

PugglesRule November 8, 2012 at 9:49 am

Straight (pardon the pun) out of Central Casting — from 1954.

MosesInvests November 8, 2012 at 11:42 am

Very presidential skin color, to be sure.

PsycWench November 8, 2012 at 9:15 am

OOH, you are supposed to EXPECT public/press scrutiny. Did Romney know that ahead of time?

e_z November 8, 2012 at 9:19 am

That will be covered in Mitt's autobiography in the chapter entitled "Things I Learned"

Lot_49 November 8, 2012 at 9:45 am

It'll look pretty silly on the shelf next to No Apologies, the other half of the Romney oeuvre.

Stevola November 8, 2012 at 10:47 am

"No Apologies" will be followed by "I Apologize," which will be followed by "No Apologies II: I Never Apologized"

Abernathy November 8, 2012 at 9:47 am

Stop. This is hard.

Callyson November 8, 2012 at 12:22 pm

That only applies to the little people.

bikerlaureate November 8, 2012 at 1:08 pm

Was the Rove-pusbag supposed to tell him?
Oops.

FNMA November 8, 2012 at 9:16 am

So I guess they won't be accepting my application to be Secretary of the Interior. I was leaning toward Defense, because, well, blowing shit up would be kinda cool, but Interior, you don't have to go outside, right?

Toomush_Infer November 8, 2012 at 9:23 am

Right – I think that's the job where you just write down whatever the Interior Decorator says, like: "needs more car elevators"…..

Generation[redacted] November 8, 2012 at 9:39 am

Day One, you'll need to hire an undersecretary of measuring the drapes.

ThundercatHo November 8, 2012 at 10:06 am

Be sure the carpet matches.

thatsitfortheother1 November 8, 2012 at 10:45 am

The Canadians I know call their middle finger the Secretary of the Interior.

viennawoods13 November 8, 2012 at 4:32 pm

Never heard that one before.

mrpuma2u November 8, 2012 at 10:49 am

I was angling for chief of staff. I was all set to run around in the Congressional gym shower and yell at people to tow the line on whatever in the buff.

FNMA November 8, 2012 at 2:25 pm

Isn't that Jerry Sandusky's prison job?

boskolives November 8, 2012 at 9:16 am

It touches my heart whenever someone that's never done an honest days work (or an "honest" anything else) is so dedicated to putting people back to work. Even if it's cleaning his house, or his other house, or any of his other houses. Also.

evoshandor November 8, 2012 at 1:13 pm

Come on now, I'm sure he's had honest bowel movements…though I doubt he had to clean up after himself.

PsycWench November 8, 2012 at 9:16 am

I like the instruction "clicking the button below will open a new window". Just in case you were anxious about that right-click or back button not working.

weejee November 8, 2012 at 9:34 am

Like the maths, clicking the clickies is hard.

Whollyholeyholy November 8, 2012 at 9:42 am

It's a lot more complicated than shaking an Etch-A-Sketch after all.

PugglesRule November 8, 2012 at 9:50 am

Also, this webmaster learned his trade in 1999.

PsycWench November 8, 2012 at 9:57 am

From an ad on Oracle or Friendster. Or maybe AOL. They needed the ad revenue to send the software updates on those floppy discs.

succalina November 8, 2012 at 11:58 am

Can I do it on my Jitterbug?

ph7 November 8, 2012 at 9:16 am

Wait, so I applied for that "Oats Feeder" position for nothing?

not that Dewey November 8, 2012 at 9:21 am

"Rafalca Fluffer" is still available.

Mumbletypeg November 8, 2012 at 9:29 am

Ron Jeremy applied for it but was turned down. Apparently didn't have possession of what Mitt considers, appropriate "holdings."

not that Dewey November 8, 2012 at 9:49 am

THAT'S NOT GENITAL TRANSCENDENCE

FlipFlopFuck November 8, 2012 at 9:29 am

con voce harelip: "I wanna see the horses twat!"

ThundercatHo November 8, 2012 at 10:08 am

You are so bad.

Misty Malarky November 8, 2012 at 9:26 am

The APPLY ONLINE button is not working. Is there a phone number we can call Mitts on to apply, or can we just show up after the lunch rush?

finallyhappy November 8, 2012 at 9:33 am

When the White House (after President Barack Hussein OBAMA!!- YEAH ,WE WON- again!) was looking for volunteers and the Prez had promised the girls a dog- I sent in a request to walk/clean up after said future dog. I did not get picked(I understand that the horticultural staff take care of Bo- although I was told that Sasha and Malia also bring him out for walks/runs as far as the kitchen garden). Maybe I can reapply for the second term(WE WON- WE WON)

BadKitty904 November 8, 2012 at 9:19 am

"My name is MittRmoneyas, king of kings: Look on my works, ye Mighty, and despair!"

BaldarTFlagass November 8, 2012 at 9:48 am

Also: "I am become death, destroyer of worlds."

Chichikovovich November 8, 2012 at 10:29 am

But they aren't headless trunks of stone. Just brainless.

doloras November 8, 2012 at 11:34 am

The lone and level sands of Utah stretch far away.

MacRaith November 8, 2012 at 9:19 am

Love the tagline "Smaller, Simpler, Smarter". They certainly have the first two of those down cold. They have a lot of work to do on that third one, though.

Jennyjen798 November 8, 2012 at 10:16 pm

That's the tagline here at my government office here in the great old state of Tex-Ass. Except when you think of stuff that is smaller, simpler, smarter (faster) you get a lot of no can't do that or no that costs too much, that would just be too much work to change, or no one here can learn how to do that shit. So I go about pushing my paper like it's still 1982. /grumble.

ChillBill November 8, 2012 at 9:20 am

At least the idiot at natesilveriswrong.com was smart enough to take it down right away.

PugglesRule November 8, 2012 at 9:51 am

But what about unskewedpolls.com?

actor212 November 8, 2012 at 9:54 am

He apologized, believe it or not.

I posted in Wonkville about it. Should be in the "Newest" link

ChillBill November 8, 2012 at 9:55 am

He actually admitted to being wrong. I think it was just all a ploy to make money out of Wingnuts! How else do you explain the Louie Anderson pic? (see article).

ttommyunger November 8, 2012 at 9:20 am

I am open to any position except Director of: "Proving That President Romney Isn't a Soulless Dick". That, my friend, is just a bridge too fucking far.

memzilla November 8, 2012 at 9:20 am

Most. Unnecessary. Website. EVAH.

noodlesalad November 8, 2012 at 9:22 am

In all seriousness, I am in SE Asia at the moment, and just had a few drinks with some friends (suck it, America, it's already Thursday night here). I'm drinking with a Sikh, and Hindu and a Muslim, and we raised multiple glasses to Obama, and I got kind of teary-eyed. Thanks for not fucking the world up, friends, and voting for this moran who I'm sure had a "the next four wars" tab on his bogus transition site! It makes for more happy drunks here in Singapore at the very least.

BaldarTFlagass November 8, 2012 at 9:27 am

Noodlesalad goes into a bar with a Sikh, and Hindu and a Muslim…

BadKitty904 November 8, 2012 at 9:29 am

My bf was in a conference call with Hong-freekin-Kong yesterday and got multiple congratulations on Obama's re-election. I'm kinda sensing a global sigh of relief goin' on here.

Nice save, America!

Chet Kincaid_ November 8, 2012 at 9:42 am

Drinking?! Must be one of those Episcopalian Muslims.

YasserArraFeck November 8, 2012 at 3:43 pm

As long as it's not bacon vodka.

thatsitfortheother1 November 8, 2012 at 10:47 am

I live in Germany. Obama's re-election is still front page news. CNN International has some shit about British chefs on.

PsycWench November 8, 2012 at 9:23 am

I see the top pic says that the 21st century must be an American century. What the hell does that even mean?

BaldarTFlagass November 8, 2012 at 9:29 am

I thought the 20th century was the American Century. Isn't it someone else's turn?

BadKitty904 November 8, 2012 at 9:34 am

I think Costa Rica has dibs.

Lot_49 November 8, 2012 at 9:49 am

Ha! No military. Everybody runs around chanting "Pura vida!" but who do they drop bombs on? Nobody!

FlownOver November 8, 2012 at 9:29 am

"All your asset are belong to us" is, I believe, the intended message there.

boskolives November 8, 2012 at 9:35 am

Mittz victory party advisory for those who didn't choose to celebrate the win, "Put your head between your legs and kiss your assets goodbye".

finallyhappy November 8, 2012 at 9:34 am

Well, when the current President is a secret Kenyan Muslim……

Chet Kincaid_ November 8, 2012 at 9:43 am

It means he wanted to start a ground war on the 21st Century, after softening it up with some Shock and Awe.

Maman November 8, 2012 at 9:44 am

The sun never sets on the British Empire?

tessiee November 8, 2012 at 10:02 am

It means white.

Toomush_Infer November 8, 2012 at 10:19 am

They meant to say "one American's century" – the 1% is fighting it out….

outragedcitizen November 11, 2012 at 12:56 pm

Didn't the neocons try to start that mime during the first 8 years of the 21 century under the clown prince, Dubya?

That worked out well for them.

deanbooth November 8, 2012 at 9:23 am

* Shudder * It's like the ghost of President future.

ph7 November 8, 2012 at 10:13 am

where Ebeneezer Scrooge is Job Creator and Tiny Tim is a lazy 47%er who just wants things.

Estproph November 8, 2012 at 9:24 am

Can't he just buy a new IRS and put an end to the tax nonsense?

BaldarTFlagass November 8, 2012 at 9:24 am

This reminds me of that New England Patriots "19-0" book, that one season.

Joshua Norton November 8, 2012 at 9:24 am

This “Join the Administration” page is the funniest one.

And it only cost $3.99 per minute to "apply".

T3rbo November 8, 2012 at 10:47 am

yeah, what the hell does that even mean? Romney didn't have anyone in mind or lined up to work for him, so he thought this made sense? What was the thinking, people who didn't have jobs would google "Work for Romney Administration," and this page would be the number one search result? Totally unfit to govern

FlipFlopFuck November 8, 2012 at 9:25 am

Test or GTFO!

BadKitty904 November 8, 2012 at 9:25 am

I hope I have enough cash saved up to buy the federal "Director of Porcine Aviation" position in Rmoney's new regime!

Incitefully_Joe November 8, 2012 at 9:46 am

I have my heart set on "Special Advisor on Infernal Climate Change", myself.

tessiee November 8, 2012 at 10:02 am

Sorry, Kitty, he's already got Pink Floyd penciled in for that.

Toomush_Infer November 8, 2012 at 9:26 am

Actually, this is an ongoing work by Fux and Frends, based on the alternative reality system they've been putting together since the beginning of the election season….it's really just a work in progress…temporarily called "Bizarro World"….but still looking for the real (imaginary) title – suggestions?…

BadKitty904 November 8, 2012 at 9:35 am

"The Matrix"?

Toomush_Infer November 8, 2012 at 10:20 am

"The Mittrix?"

BaldarTFlagass November 8, 2012 at 9:26 am

So, will Romney go back to Bain and resume his practice of slash & burn capitalism?

Schmannnity November 8, 2012 at 9:28 am

A dancing horse in every pot. Now that's exciting.

PsycWench November 8, 2012 at 9:28 am

Wonder how Victoria Jackson would fare in the FBI background check. The "love toilet" skit from SNL could stop that process cold.

Joshua Norton November 8, 2012 at 9:28 am

From now on, no presidential candidate will ever have to show her taxes, due to the precedent set by Mr. Senor Romney,

The REAL precedent is the amount of money the rich asshats dropped down the crapper trying to buy the election. I haven't seen so many zeros in a row since the last time Wil Wheaton had a book signing.

BadKitty904 November 8, 2012 at 9:38 am

Managing to fuck away $400,000,000, with almost 0 return, is a clear and, I hope, lasting tribute to the GOP's outstanding business acumen.

finallyhappy November 8, 2012 at 9:45 am

I seriously object to that-I like Wil Wheaton- esp now that he and Sheldon aren't enemies

FlownOver November 8, 2012 at 9:31 am

I would have put in for Undersecretary of You Must Have Misunderstood – We Never Said Any Such Thing.

Mondo_Cane November 8, 2012 at 10:11 am

that would be way too much work….

Redgyal November 8, 2012 at 9:32 am

Excellent use of the word hubris.

RomneysLogCabin November 8, 2012 at 9:34 am

Who's Mitt Romney? What movie is this from?

tessiee November 8, 2012 at 10:03 am

That really bad one where Bruce Campbell played a failed politician and James Spader played his smarmy, dickish sidekick.

HELisforHEL November 8, 2012 at 10:42 am

HAHA They would have been preferable to the real pair!

FakaktaSouth November 8, 2012 at 9:34 am

I like how Mitt seems to be looking off in to the future in that picture. The future of not being President, of being the loser he is, just stone cold staring off into nothing. We can thank Mormon Jesus for something for once.

BaldarTFlagass November 8, 2012 at 9:36 am

Funny thing is, he's looking to the left.

FakaktaSouth November 8, 2012 at 9:38 am

Well shit, I guess me and Mitt's got something in common.

freakishlywrong November 8, 2012 at 9:34 am

I'm late to this party. I've been drooling over pictures of Romney "supporters" crying all over the 'tubes. Does this make me a bad person?

FakaktaSouth November 8, 2012 at 9:37 am

If hating on morons is bad, I don't want to be good.

BadKitty904 November 8, 2012 at 9:41 am

Consider *their* response if they'd won.

Incitefully_Joe November 8, 2012 at 9:55 am

Can't imagine it'd be any worse than their response having lost.

FlownOver November 8, 2012 at 9:59 am

Anybody check lately on the state of readiness at Fort Sumter?

Incitefully_Joe November 8, 2012 at 10:12 am

You know, I'm beginning to suspect that some of the opposition to Obama might have something to do with his race or something.

finallyhappy November 8, 2012 at 9:47 am

yeah, white people in really white people looking clothing- esp the ones in Vegas

caridiva November 8, 2012 at 9:57 am

OMG! I thought that I was the only…I laid in bed all day yesterday grinning gleefully at the sobbing pictures! Priceless!

Mondo_Cane November 8, 2012 at 10:12 am

I struggled with this yesterday – it probably does, but judeo-christian tradition has it that it's forgivable….

Stevola November 8, 2012 at 10:59 am

Today, we are all bad people

bloggingbalkanistan November 8, 2012 at 9:35 am

When I see this, I almost feel bad for Mittens! Losing is hard! But, then I remember that Mittens ran the most cynical, negative and dishonest campaign in recent political history and would have been an insufferable jerk to Barry if he had won-and those feelings all go away. ha ha ha.

Jimmyone November 8, 2012 at 11:53 am

It is almost vindication for the poor guy who was held down while mitt cut his hair…

SnarkoMarx November 8, 2012 at 9:35 am

Am I the only one who feels a slight pang of disappointment that America will now never get to enjoy photographs of that little scamp, Tagg Romney, peeking out of the footwell of the president’s desk as his smiling dad sits above him signing an executive order mandating thinner gruel in workhouse orphanages?

tessiee November 8, 2012 at 10:05 am

No, Tagg shares your disappointment.
And Tool and Tuff and Ruff and Buff and Biff and Tush and Tits, also too.

elviouslyqueer November 8, 2012 at 9:35 am

Oh please. According to NPR, Mittens hadn't even written a concession speech until it became clear that his ass was toast (Barry had written an acceptance and a concession speech, just in case).

Denial ain't just a river for these morons.

BadKitty904 November 8, 2012 at 9:43 am

Barry is a professional. Mitt is a delusional mannequin who was sure he could buy the presidency.

tessiee November 8, 2012 at 10:06 am

Also, remember how we discussed certain so-called "human beings" being ot-nay oo-tay art-smay?

BaldarTFlagass November 8, 2012 at 9:44 am

I'm kinda surprised that, in his concession speech, he didn't announce the Romney-Obama Co-Presidency.

FlipFlopFuck November 8, 2012 at 9:46 am

Exactly, I'm surprised they just didn't leave the site up. "Reality doesn't matter."

actor212 November 8, 2012 at 9:52 am

See, if Palin had run and lost, she would have and called it a "shadow government" or some such.

actor212 November 8, 2012 at 9:52 am

When Blitzer said around 9:30 Tuesday night that they couldn't get hold of any Romney advisors about the loss in PA, that they were all holed up in a conference room and that the TV screens in the ballroom had been switched from showing results on FOX to campaign videos, I turned to my daughter and said, "I can't believe they're just writing the concession speech now"

viennawoods13 November 8, 2012 at 4:43 pm

They should have listened to Toby

HouseOfTheBlueLights November 8, 2012 at 10:12 am

It's part of attraction philosophy. If you only write the victory speech, then victory just comes to you. If you write a concession speech, you invite defeat. And I bet Barry's was Awesome.

Stevola November 8, 2012 at 11:02 am

FOX: Obama actually lost! Here's the concession speech!

tessiee November 8, 2012 at 9:35 am

OT, but at last now it can be said:
http://www.theonion.com/articles/i-mean-if-i-lose
Excerpt: "Mitt Romney makes me want to drive a scalding hot nail into my eyeball. He’s a piece of fucking dog shit who has done nothing in this world except figure out how to say things people want to hear in order to get what he wants. He’s a gutless cocksucker pig fuck."

FNMA November 8, 2012 at 9:56 am

I loved that piece. And overall, The Onion's election coverage has been spectacular. Particularly enjoyed this one: http://www.theonion.com/articles/i-want-to-congra

fuflans November 8, 2012 at 9:57 pm

wow. that's like their editorial on the election.

BaldarTFlagass November 8, 2012 at 9:36 am

They went ahead and let it go live in order to give the folks on the right something to fap to through the tears.

tessiee November 8, 2012 at 10:07 am

I thought they were all already fapping to videos of the first debate through the tears.

finallyhappy November 8, 2012 at 9:36 am

I saw a wedding announcement in the NY Times- two people who both work at Bain and Co. I was guessing this was not Bain's Deli. At least working at the Deli- you would be doing something decent and useful

Chet Kincaid_ November 8, 2012 at 9:38 am
finallyhappy November 8, 2012 at 9:49 am

I haven't heard crumb-bum since my uncle, a Philly cab driver, died- 50 years ago!

Chet Kincaid_ November 8, 2012 at 9:53 am

Your Uncle was Ben Grimm?!

finallyhappy November 8, 2012 at 5:26 pm

well, his first name was Benny!!

weejee November 8, 2012 at 9:38 am

404½ WINGNUT ERROR FOUND

ElPinche November 8, 2012 at 9:38 am

Well……..I'm glad the idiot didn't win. Only an idiot would believe his own lies ("POLLS AINT REAL, THEYR OVERSAMPELING DEMOCRAPS!!).

BaldarTFlagass November 8, 2012 at 9:39 am

Unfortunately for his campaign, http://www.bitterloser. com was already taken.

drewehartnyc November 8, 2012 at 9:49 am

Actually, it wasn't taken and I was so surprised, I bought it. Hmmmmmm. what to do with that domain name?

MacRaith November 8, 2012 at 9:57 am

Host a collection of Donald Trump's tweets, for starters. Maybe Ted Nugent's, too.

Biel_ze_Bubba November 8, 2012 at 10:34 am

Just steal content wholesale from the wingnut sites. Think of the bumper stickers, coffee mugs, T-shirts, caps, and greeting cards you could market, with that gold mine of material!

arihaya November 8, 2012 at 9:39 am

Now we know whom Mitt is going to fire to lift his mood.

ManchuCandidate November 8, 2012 at 9:40 am

All YOUR VOTES ARE BELONG TO… wait… wut?

BaldarTFlagass November 8, 2012 at 9:41 am

New cereal from General Mills:
Defeaties, Breakfast of Losers.

actor212 November 8, 2012 at 9:44 am

Tearieos

FlownOver November 8, 2012 at 10:03 am

Nabisco Shredded Lies.

Biel_ze_Bubba November 8, 2012 at 10:31 am

Frosted Flakes

(heh)

Mumbletypeg November 8, 2012 at 9:42 am

Hopefuls for a Romney administration appointment: "Close But No C-zar"

actor212 November 8, 2012 at 9:43 am

"Close but no Caesar" you mean

Mumbletypeg November 8, 2012 at 10:00 am

Thought about that too! *fist-bumps*

ManchuCandidate November 8, 2012 at 9:43 am

If Mittens had won then being an abortion and taxing hating son of a GOPer with all the experience of an ice cream truck driver would have meant something again.

boskolives November 8, 2012 at 9:43 am

Uber-Happiness over all of the Koch Bros bucks that went down the Romney hole, which meant that they couldn't go to support any of the other repub asshats. Not ignoring you Shelley, it's just that you're a comparative piker with your casino chips and all.

actor212 November 8, 2012 at 9:43 am

Whoopsie!

arihaya November 8, 2012 at 9:46 am

Were there job opening for Secretary of Silly Walks?

actor212 November 8, 2012 at 9:47 am
Tealiban November 8, 2012 at 9:52 am

+1000 Internets for you sir!

actor212 November 8, 2012 at 9:54 am

*curtsies*

HELisforHEL November 8, 2012 at 10:35 am

Brilliant!

BaldarTFlagass November 8, 2012 at 9:47 am

Ha ha, the joke's on Romney. I already have a government job. Unlike him.

BadKitty904 November 8, 2012 at 9:51 am

Well, his campaign certainly eliminated at least one government job…

actor212 November 8, 2012 at 9:58 am

Taker!

PugglesRule November 8, 2012 at 10:10 am

ME too! And I didn't pay a gazillion bucks to get mine. I got the top score on the civil service exam.

ThundercatHo November 8, 2012 at 10:10 am

See, this is why I love you.

Abernathy November 8, 2012 at 9:48 am

Felt the same way when Mittens proudly announced that he only wrote an acceptance speech. Cuz you really want a President who only prepares for the best-case scenario.

FlipFlopFuck November 8, 2012 at 9:48 am

You think that's bad, you should have seen the pop-up ads.

BaldarTFlagass November 8, 2012 at 9:49 am

Hey, I came up with another Obama's Dick So Big joke. Can I post it here?

SnarkoMarx November 8, 2012 at 9:57 am

He went skinny dipping in Loch Ness years ago and people are still talking about it?

PugglesRule November 8, 2012 at 10:11 am

Are we talking about B. Barry Bamz or Old Handsome Joe Biden? *is confused*

tessiee November 8, 2012 at 10:10 am

Not only can you, we insist on it.

bobster1985 November 8, 2012 at 9:49 am

The Romney campaign: the gift that keeps on giving.

Maman November 8, 2012 at 9:51 am

It turns out that community organizing is good at something…. Like organizing. a community. like a campaign.

freakishlywrong November 8, 2012 at 9:53 am

At least he has endless MTP appearances to look forward to.

BadKitty904 November 8, 2012 at 9:56 am

Wait 'til his first post-asswhuppin' appearance on the Faux Network…

not that Dewey November 8, 2012 at 9:57 am

For Sale: winning campaign strategy. new in box.

sbj1964 November 8, 2012 at 9:57 am

I have been reading comments posted in Conservatard Blogs many of them are claiming they are going to leave America.I have volunteered to help them pack,or drive them to the airport.Others are just having a complete melt down.I fear some may be suicidal.The red state cult of stupid needs a hug.

actor212 November 8, 2012 at 10:00 am

No, man, this is great! Most countries won't let you immigrate in unless you a) have bookoo bucks or b) have a skill that one of their citizens doesn't have.

This is perfect! They can be…dare I say?…ILLEGAL IMMIGRANTS!

FlownOver November 8, 2012 at 10:05 am

DIBS ON THEIR STUFF!

PugglesRule November 8, 2012 at 10:12 am

If they plan to go to Canada, remind them that Canada has universal health care AND marriage equality. The upside is, no hurricanes!

jqheywood November 8, 2012 at 11:44 am

The downside is that it is colder than fuckall…

The upside is proximity to a Tim Horton's

viennawoods13 November 8, 2012 at 4:45 pm

That is not an advantage.

FNMA November 8, 2012 at 9:58 am

Off topic, but here it is a couple of days later, and I am still enjoying the fuck out of the wing-nuts losing their shit over Bammerz kicking their ass. Does that make me a bad person?

Mondo_Cane November 8, 2012 at 10:22 am

if you haven't been there yet, go to Michelle Malkin's blog and check out the comments – golden –

paulabflat November 8, 2012 at 12:08 pm

the worst kind. our kind.

be loud. be proud.

sullivanst November 8, 2012 at 10:07 am

♪♫
There's a whole lot of Romneys suffering tonight
From the disease of conceit
Whole lot of goobers struggling tonight
From the disease of conceit
Comes right down the ballots
Down the long lines
Rips into your senses
Through your body and your mind
The schadenfreude's so sweet
The disease of conceit
♪♫

PugglesRule November 8, 2012 at 10:12 am

Melody?

sullivanst November 8, 2012 at 10:14 am

Bob Dylan, Disease of Conceit, from the 1989 album "Oh Mercy"

HouseOfTheBlueLights November 8, 2012 at 10:09 am

How does "smaller, simpler" work with massive infusion of money into Defense?

Terry November 8, 2012 at 10:11 am

"This “Join the Administration” page is the funniest one. Like, did you know it is not always awesome buying yourself a cabinet position or whatever?"

It's good of the Romney folks to warn people up front that they'd have to go through an FBI background check. That must be a concern for a lot of their campaign contributors.

Biel_ze_Bubba November 8, 2012 at 10:29 am

I'll be happy to take a job helping Willard transition himself completely out of sight. With that experience in hand, I'll then offer the same services to the many other GOPtard politicians who we'd just as soon never see again.

DixvilleCrotch November 8, 2012 at 10:40 am

I blame GoDaddy.com and a mischievous DNS server.

UW8316154 November 8, 2012 at 10:46 am

Didn't Herman Cain already call dibs on Secretary of Defense?

T3rbo November 8, 2012 at 10:52 am

Nope, that was Allen West. If we get into trouble with Iran, we just have to fire a gun next to its head and scare it into backing down. That totally would have worked-thanks, vermin

UW8316154 November 8, 2012 at 12:27 pm

http://articles.latimes.com/2011/dec/15/news/la-p

Cain shared the idea with ABC's Barbara Walters during her annual special on the "10 Most Fascinating People." Cain said he thought he'd be a good pick because he wants to "influence rebuilding our military the way it should be."
Walters, stunned, reminded Cain of his struggles during the campaign with topics like Libya. And there is always Uzbeki-beki-beki-stan-stan.

"I have been doing my homework ever since that difficulty," Cain said.

T3rbo November 8, 2012 at 10:50 am

Yeah, what in the hell. I don't think Obammy used craigslist to find suitable staff, did he?

LibrarianX November 8, 2012 at 10:54 am

Hey! He spent the last seven years practicing that pose (see above). Too bad he didn't practice standing for something.

owhatever November 8, 2012 at 11:41 am

God: Mitt, didn't you get that golden plate I sent, telling you not to run for president? I had Moroni take it down personally.

Moroni: I was stopped at the front gate by one of his sons, Twat, because I looked funny.

God: So gimme back the plate. Gold is going up again.

Moroni: Can't. I buried it somewhere. He can dig it up later.

barto November 8, 2012 at 11:55 am

Also too the splash page shows a nice shot of BO's inauguration – prescient indeed!

Rosie_Scenario November 8, 2012 at 12:57 pm

Not sure what man would want to be "shorter and simpler," but when Mitt's right, he's right. "Smarter" — not so much.

mustangsavvy November 8, 2012 at 1:46 pm

Poor Mittens. He woke up yesterday, totally bummed. Had to call and cancel all the ties he bought for his first 100 days in office. Had to cancel the "I'm the President!!! Tax Cuts for Everyone!!" Pool Party at his Caymans home this weekend. Had to cancel the order of "Thank You for Giving Me All Your Moneez" cards for his donors. Not to mention that voicemail from Bamz that he had to white knuckle thru…..something about meeting up soon. SIGH.

He tells Ann he just needs some alone time. Fires up the 'puter, tries to surf a little Internet for some soul soothing cat videos and BAM! He sees his transition website still up and running. That had to have given him a massive emotional wedgie. Poor Mittens. And he can't even grab a beer to cry into! This man has suffered.

Troglodeity November 8, 2012 at 2:06 pm

At least they took it down … unlike Unskewed Polls which still has this ridiculous "definitive," "spot-on accurate" November 5 prediction of the glorious Romney victory: http://unskewedpolls.com/unskewed_projection_2012

cousinitt November 8, 2012 at 3:22 pm

No Tagg, stop! That's not a DeLorean! It's a tiiiimmmmme maaaaaaaacccccchhhhhhhhh

elgin_pelican November 9, 2012 at 2:12 pm

It's like the end of Planet of the Apes, except it's a statue of MITTENS ohgod omygod ohgod

mosjef November 12, 2012 at 10:42 pm

On the other hand, Romney's http://www.AbjectFailure.com, the National Disgrace and Epic Election Loss Web site is live and holding online interviews for Romney/Ryan Imaginary Cabinet positions. There's a touching blog from Paul Ryan about having to bang his own wife and put his own hat on backward now that the Secret Service won't do it for him.

Nothingisamiss November 8, 2012 at 11:49 am

It's racist to think someone's rascist, you rascist.

Comments on this entry are closed.

Previous post:

Next post: