THE INTERNET LIES! ROMNEY WINS!You saw it happen, folks. You sat on your big butt and you watched Barack Obama, who was not born in America, steal the election — again — so that he can ruin the country and impose sharia law.

He had four years to impose his evil Muslim ways, and he didn’t, but that’s not evidence of ANYTHING, and we are still in grave danger.

Thank goodness a brave, brave patriot like Donald Trump is around to point us in the right direction, by bravely tweeting that we should have a “revolution!” and then bravely deleting those tweets.

Donald “That Fuckin’ Guy” Trump may have bailed on his tantrumtweets, but we have not, OH NO! And we took a picture of them before he deleted them, because that seemed like just the kind of upstanding thing he would do:
He coulda been a contenda.

Hey, you who are pointing and laughing! Stop that. Place that pointing mockfinger over your heart, because we are in the presence of a patriot. Sam Adams deleted plenty of tweets in his day, and that was before anybody had to even whine about the electoral college. Trump is fighting a corrupt system, which he was participating in as a candidate for a while, but now he sees it’s totally corrupt, because he didn’t get what he wanted.

Now he sees the truth, and graciously showed us, for a minute or two, before chickening out. When do we march?

Check out Wonkette on Facebook and Twitter, and, if you’re really excited, Rich Abdill is on Facebook and Twitter too.

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  • PennyDreadful

    Sir Donald ran away, oh, he bravely ran away.

    • Stevola

      When danger reared its ugly head, he clutched his bad toupee and fled

  • TheGyrus

    WITH VOTES, Donald. You have to say WITH VOTES.

  • HereKitty


  • Barbara_

    I am anxiously awaiting for Romney to smack his lips for the last time, give his concession speech and then we can wave goodbye to him, his wife and toothy sons. Even Palin had a concession speech.

    • DustyBowlBlues

      Barb–I thought I was the only one who noticed that. Annoying, isn't it? That lip-smacking, I mean.

      • Barbara_

        Limey Lizzie told me about the lip smacking.

        • babsinbuffalo

          It's the smirk accompanied by the sad puppy dog eyes that really irks me. You know the look I mean.

          • redarmyzombie

            Oh god, if it were a choice between that smirk and Carrier Zero of the Zombie Apocalypse, I wouldn't know which to smash in first…

            …With votes, of course…

  • Beowoof

    Hopefully that thing on his head will stage a revolution and escape back to forest whence it came.

    • Poor small life! Furry woodland creature stuck on that monstrous dome.

  • noodlesalad

    Too late to call for voluntary deportations for treasonous billionaires?

    • Call it "Amnesty For Billionaires" and they'll all get on the plane like docile sheep. Next stop? FREE MARKET SOMALIA.

    • Perhaps the coming IRS audit will convince him to spend a little time abroad.

    • Nowisallthereis

      Never too late

  • Speaking of wingnut fucktards, Allen West is down by 400+ votes with 97% counted!

    • FlipFlopFuck

      Alan Grayson won too!

      • Lascauxcaveman


        • FlipFlopFuck


          • YAHOO!!!

          • FlipFlopFuck

            (Hugs Mittborg!)

      • Callyson

        Seriously? FUCK YEAH!!!

    • Bonzos_Bed_Time

      Whatabout dear Shellie of the crazy eyes?

      Edit: just looked it up, so far she's up but 30% still outstanding:

      Come on Baby Jesus, kick her to the curb!

      • Just saw on Twitter she's now down by 400.

  • Suck it Trump, you worthless imbecile.

  • LePiston

    I tied to leave a comment on Mittens Romney's fuhbook page. The first two times, I responded to a Romney post, telling him it's time for a little concession speech. Both times, I got an error message. I am kind of a fb junkie, and I have never seen that error message. So, I went ahead and liked MR's page, in the hopes I could leave a new comment. Got the same message. CONSPIRACY.

  • Okay, now THAT is the most appropriate gif I've ever seen.

  • It's not the Donalds fault, his hair got in front of his eyes. And his penis. And his shoes. And, that's "hair" singular, there's only one really long one that's sort of like the spaghetti in the love scene in "Lady and the Tramp".

    • ProgressiveInga

      Begs the question, "Does the carpet match the drapes?"

      I really don't want to know.

      • bobbert

        It's possible that the carpet IS the drapes.

        No, I don't want to visualize that either.

    • Willardbot9000_V2.5

      That isn't hair…I've said it all along…it's an alien organism. Have you seen Alien? It's like a facehugger only it clings to the top of persons head and spreads out to sort of look like hair. It takes a spike and drills into their cortex to get at the brain (which in trumps case by be pierced by a straw because he has a soft head) and then sucks the brain cells out, slowly. It also controls the brain waves and mutates them: symptoms include, increased idiocy over a fractal period, inability to censor ones thoughts, identifying with the Republican Party and once the brain is gone, running for the Presidency as a Republican. Terrifying, no?

  • Beowoof

    Donald is brave man, heading off to bankrupt another casino and try to get his crappy tv show renewed so he continues to have income.

  • The popular vote is closing. It is wide now because California and Washington are still counting. Remember, Gore was behind on election night, and for a few days after in 2002. the big liberal bastions are always the last to report.

    So Trump should look even more foolish in a few days.

    • bobbert

      Cali will end up plus 2M or so for Bammerz, so the popular vote "controversy" will last until, maybe, Thursday. I presume that's why Donald Dump deleted his twats.

    • Callyson

      When I took the dogs out, I passed by a pollworker who told me that they had a record turnout in my Los Angeles polling place–even higher than 2008.

      YES WE DID!

    • Nowisallthereis

      I MUST DISAGREE. Donald cannot look any more foolish.

  • Oh, to the wingnut "One Term Barry" who has been "monitoring" many of us… you better change your fucking name.

    • I said it earlier when they were still counting the votes, but it is one term, one that's 8 years long.

    • LibertyLover

      Perhaps he could change it to "Dingleberry" – seems appropriate.

  • snowpointsecret

    "He lost the popular vote by a lot!"

    Uhh… About that, Obama just took the lead in that too.

    • Stevola

      What would Nelson Muntz say?

    • Willardbot9000_V2.5

      by over 2 million nonetheless…securing 50%+ while Rmoney sits at 48%…haha, Trump you fucking moron

  • barto

    What's the hip expression for drunk tweeting?

    • MissNancyPriss

      "sexting"? No, tht's not it.

    • BadKitty904


    • BloviateMe

      …morning regret.

    • Callyson

      Saying what you really think?

  • R-74, Gay marriage, is passing in Washington, with 51.98% of the vote as of 9:23. Don't know how much of the vote is in. However, the local news is saying it is looking good. Assume that means that the exit polls are positive.

  • woolmyn

    And I don't seem to remember him complaining when Gore won the popular vote.

  • Lascauxcaveman

    OTOH, on ABC you've got an actual grownup conservative (George Will) saying things like, "With the younger generation, being gay is like being left-handed, it's not an issue. It's boring…"

    • BadKitty904

      Gee, thanks, George. I'll let the other homos know.

    • bobbert

      I have to correct your terminology. That would be "actual grownup conservative asshole (George Will)"

    • Detesticle

      George Will is the anti-Christ's concessionaire. It's a shitty job, but he gets to see all the games.

    • fishwharf

      Everybody knows George Will is a blowhard asshole.

  • Beowoof

    Mention a certain bankrupt allegedly rich guy and all of sudden to you need administrator approval. Sigh.

  • I-502 has passed Washington. Pot will now be decriminalized for those over 21.

    Oh yeah!

    • Beowoof

      Hey living in DC with all those republicans from flyover states, weed is a necessity.

    • Lascauxcaveman

      Lionel, as your attorney, I should advise you that the terms "decriminalized" and LEGALIZED are not one and the same.

      Back to law school with you.

    • emmelemm

      Smoke 'em if you got 'em.

      • savethispatient

        More importantly, tax 'em if you've got 'em. Damn hippies! ;)

  • LibertyLover

    The world is certainly laughing at Trump. (If they knew who the fuck he is.)

    • The only man in the history of forever to lose money TWICE running a casino.

  • Isn't this treason, or sedition or something?
    Shouldn't he be sent to the slammer? At least?
    (I'm so sick of this shit.)

    • Glenzilla says that advocating overthrowing the government is legal. Some supreme court ruling, &c.

  • I have a feeling that Trump would not do very well in a revolution. Not well at all.

    • MosesInvests

      UP AGAINST THE WALL! (with votes, of course)

      • BloviateMe

        My "vote" for Trump is going in dry.

    • LibertyLover

      The revolution won't be catered.

  • jesus christ romney, egg JUST CONCEDE/

  • DustyBowlBlues

    That veep at Chrysler was right when he tweeted: Donald Trump is full of shit.

    I started my day delivering my 15 pies and 20 lbs of cole shaw to church. For Jesus. And ended it with an openly lesbian senator elected and Hopey getting a second term. Good day for the good guys. And ladies.

    • bobbert

      Good day pretty much all around. Any good news from OK?

  • LibertyLover

    Tammy Duckworth has defeated Joe (not that one, the other one) Walsh.


    • Lascauxcaveman


      • Illinois. (Western Chicago suburbs, I believe.)

  • Native_of_SL_UT

    After reading that tweet, I had to look up the definition of treason. I think the only keeping him from being charged is that nobody takes him serious anymore.

    • bobbert

      Why he deleted it, I suspect. (Sedition, though, not treason).

    • I don't care what kind of ratings that idiotic Apprentice show gets, NBC needs to kick him to the curb. Yes, he's treasonous and enough's enough.

  • BloviateMe

    Trump tears are special. Like filet mignon drizzled with angel cum.

    Delicious. My compliments to the chef.

  • DustyBowlBlues

    Meant to add, NItey-nite. I'll be wearing my Proud Democrat shirt to my doctor's office tomorrow. Socialized medicine, bitch!

  • "The loser one" ? Really, Trump? I knew you were an idiot but I wasn't aware you were an illiterate idiot.

    Oh and by the way, at this time, (12:30 AM EST)the popular vote is close but Obama is leading by at least 100K. Also.

    • bobbert

      And at least half of California yet to go.

    • DickWharfinger

      Did his rich daddy donate a tower to Wharton? But again, as noted elsewhere, he likes to tweet like a 12 year old girl. lol
      Edit Delete

  • MosesInvests

    Friend of mine here in Austin just voted for the first time at age 50. She's a gay Deaf woman, and she by God was not going to stand for a president who is opposed to rights for her and her gay Deaf son. Brought a tear to my eye.

    • Barbara_

      Your friend is my friend. Send her my love.

      • MosesInvests

        Will do, Barb. And love you, too! Lots of love tonight!

  • notreelyhelping

    No, bubba. The world is laughing at you. And that marmot nesting on your head. The rest of the world is wiping the sweat away and saying: shit, those crazy motherfuckers finally got their shit together.

    It's a sad day in Mudville…but most everywhere else is bouncing off the ceiling. Dickhead.

  • sudsmckenzie

    The night 1 million trolls died, I Blame Obama.

  • Native_of_SL_UT

    Lucky for Rick Santorum that the Donald won the twit of the day.
    Today is the day for America to stop leading from behind.
    Oh, Rick, you just shouldn't use the words "from behind."

  • BadKitty904

    "We," Donald?

  • docterry6973

    Maybe Trump's agent reminded him about the middling ratings for his crumby TV show, and about how NBC might not want to give airtime to a total asshole.

    • BadKitty904

      Or the penalty for treason.

    • bobbert

      Or to a seditionist.

  • BoroPrimorac

    Karl Rove is talking compromise. These people really think the American public are morons.

    • I wish Bitch McConnell was talking compromise.

  • snowpointsecret

    Finally, Romney is conceding.

    Maryland allowing same-sex marriage, as is Maine.

    Colorado for marijuana, but Oregon says no, apparently.

    • SexySmurf

      Warshington legalized it by 10 points. That is why Oregon will always be our Mexico.

    • BloviateMe

      God damn it Oregon.

      I've lived here for 22 years, and I still can't figure this fucking place out.

      • BadKitty904

        What are they, high?

        • bobbert

          It may be the growers. I'm pretty sure the Cali legalization lost because all the folks making a buck retailing their medical canvas voted against it.

  • I want to see Egg pouting.

  • Ktvp

    I'm tired…tired I tell ya'. And I have had quite enough of this fuck wad.

  • Blueb4sinrise

    Ian Pannell BBC News, Boston

    People have already started to leave the Romney HQ event, and the mood here is angry and ugly.

  • deliman4

    Trump is the Gallagher of pundits,only he keeps missing the watermelon!!

  • Stupid republicans can never seem to figure out that if you put something on the Internet it's there forever.

  • Barbara_

    Does this ass-hat Romney think that if he waits until late at night to concede that no one will be able to see it? Concede, you bitch! You didn't give all of us the pink slip in your Bain Capitol dealings. Some of us have jobs to go to, no thanks to you, bitch.

  • DickWharfinger

    The Miff humiliator really hurt the really bald Donald's quacking feelings at the White House correspondent's dinner in front of some 20 year old chick with really huuuuuge bazoooooms.

  • Tammy Baldwin declared winner of Wisconsin Senate Seat. Gay Marriage winning in Maine and Washington. Marijuana winning in Washington and Colorado. A Black, Muslim Homosexual Coke Head as President. Dear God, Bachmann tied.

    FOX just called VA for Obama.

    I feel like I'm in some sort of Hunter S. Thompson hangover.

    • IceCreamEmpress

      You left out Maryland gay marriage!

      • I hadn't heard. Did it pass? I honestly never thought I would see a day like this.

        Yes, just heard on CBS News, Maryland passed gay marriage.

        What a day.

        • finallyhappy

          We are proud here in Maryland- passed the Dream Act, Marriage Equality & got rid of our last GOP congressman

          • You certainly should be proud! Good work. You must have been fired up and ready to go.

    • emmelemm

      It's gonna be a beautiful morning.

  • Concede already, Mittens. I wanna go to bed.

  • Callyson


    Time to take the dogs out, then I'll catch up with you good people.


    • bobbert

      You took the dogs out?

      Does Mittens know?

  • Alan West is losing, with 97% of the vote in.

  • FakaktaSouth

    Fuck yeah, Roms called PresO and I do hope hope PresO told him to go fuck himself. Let's do this shit, with TEARS DAMN YOU.

  • lumpenprole

    Dammit, I'm done drinking. Concede! Then unicorn stuff! Hurry!

    • right? i'm out of booze and it's time for bed.

  • Florida looks like it is going Obama. Romney to give concession speech in the hour. Reported that Romney has called and conceded already. Dok. A Live blog calls.

  • BadKitty904

    Cally, I hope I'm not cutting in on your turf whilst you're out on walkies, but I'd like to thank the Wonkladies and Wonklords for hosting tonight's disgraceful orgy of righteous outrage and wicked gloating.

    It was the MOSTEST fun! :0)

  • docterry6973

    I so hope that Romney is as big a jackass as Akin was tonight, and cements his reputation as the biggest jackass ever to run for President, with the possible exception of Aaron Burr.

  • IceCreamEmpress

    Life begins at concession!

  • Steverino247

    Message to Donald Trump: Death to Traitors!

    (Um, I know I'm supposed to say "with votes" about here, but really, it's what you're supposed to do with them.)

    • bobbert

      I'm there. With luck, I'll never meet the hopeless fuck.

  • Bonghits4Jesus

    Trump calls for The Millionaire March on Washington… where will the find the servants to carry them in sedan chairs?

  • Callyson


  • Nothing like a call from the Secret Service to make you delete your tweets calling for the violent overthrow of the US government. Did you wet your pants, Donnie?

  • Callyson

    I was wondering when the tears of joy would start…I think I am happiest for the Obama girls. It must be great for them to see their father overcome the huge amount of adversity he has had to deal with…

  • Callyson

    "the task of perfecting our union moves forward"


  • Callyson

    "Or whether you waited in line for a very long time…by the way we have to fix that"


    • That was my favorite line of the speech. Because we DO have to fix that. And right away. The only thing I would put ahead of it is jailing some bankers, but I don't think that's going to happen.

  • mustangsavvy

    Thanks Donald for proving once again how much a complete fucking wanker you are.

  • Arkoday

    Wrong, Trumpo. It's you, personally, that we're laughing at.
    The World

  • oldedinvn

    Is there any chance that we readers of this site will never see that name again?

  • MisterCanoehead

    Brave Sir Robin ran away.
    Bravely ran away, away!
    When danger reared its ugly head,
    He bravely turned his tail and fled.
    Yes, brave Sir Robin turned about
    And gallantly he chickened out.
    Bravely taking to his feet
    He beat a very brave retreat,
    Bravest of the brave, Sir Robin!
    He is packing it in and packing it up
    And sneaking away and buggering up
    And chickening out and pissing off home,
    Yes, bravely he is throwing in the sponge…

  • BaldarTFlagass

    "The world is laughing at us."
    No, Donald, the world is laughing at you.

  • dennis1943

    I'm inclined to agree……..thinking of the French Model……….

  • ttommyunger

    Let me try again, because this is an important point: comments like this are inflammatory and only serve to provide false justification for terrible acts. Pussyfarts like Trump think they are being bold and brave with crap like this when in fact they are being divisive and dangerous.

  • spends2much

    Well, this helps explain why Short Fingered Vulgarian Donald Trump, "millionaire", ends up in bankruptcy court so often. When you have MORE votes, you actually WIN the popular vote, as well as the electoral college. It's math, Donald. Maybe that toddler you spawned a few years ago can help you learn it.

  • OneYieldRegular

    Somebody needs his diaper changed.

  • MinAgain

    The only place Trump would have in a revolution is up against a wall.

  • rickmaci

    You know who else did not enjoy their Wheaties this morning? I"ll start:

    Bibi Netanyahu
    Clint Eastwood
    Sheldon Adelson

  • LibertyLover

    What are the chances that Donald will donate that $5million to charity now?

  • Slim_Pickins

    The Electoral College is part of Shariah law not the US Constitution. Obviously, it has to go.

  • fishwharf

    Candy-ass billionaire crybabies make me sick.

  • elgin_pelican

    Since we don't know what it is he does, how can we make him stop it?

  • miss_grundy

    Is there any way we can push this ass hat to the edge of what's left of the boardwalk in South Jersey and hope a bigass passing shark will eat this jerk. I tweeted him last night and told him to STFU.

  • JackObin

    Little Donnie Trump; The Apprentice Human.

  • LibrarianX

    Is he on smack again?

  • Mavenmaven

    The Little Hands Revoluution

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