Wonking Your Face Off: The Live-Bloog Experience, Part III

  we are still here send mountain dew

BLOG BLOG BLOG BLOG *thud*AAAAAND WE’RE BACK! Hello, Wonketteers, and welcome to our election-night orgy of zingers and Wolf Blitzer insults. We have broken it up into hour-long posts, to prevent these things from getting too long and unwieldy. We don’t have those fancy tools like the New York Times, which, for what it’s worth, has been not working for, like, a while on election night.

Part 1, from the Good Doktor, is still around, as is Part 2, from the Kaia Mursi.

OK OK enough nonsense, let’s get to the bloog!

10:05: Richard “Rape Is God’s Will” Mourdoch lost in Indiana AND Todd “Legitimate Rape” Akin just lost Missouri. Hooray! The electorate is so smart!

10:06: Well, maybe. Remember Georgia Rep. Paul Broun? The one who said evolution and embryology were sent from hell to suck us away from Jesus? He ran unopposed.

10:07: Doktor Zoom swings in with “Akin now ‘officially’ a sucky sucky LOSER.” He then yells something about Warren/Franken 2016 and leaves.

10:17: What the hell is going on down in Florida? There are around nine votes separating Romney and Obama, and some crazy shiz is going down near Tampa. It is not clear.

BUT! They will not be amending their state constitution to abolish the separation of church and state, so that’s good for those folks down there. Except that they still have to live in Florida.

10:21: Josh F. tells us CBS has declared Tim Kaine the winner in the Virginia Senate race, which is a shame, since George “Macaca” Allen would have given us something to actually write about.

10:23: CNN analysts now just saying “Florida” over and over again. This is not as helpful. Also, the Wonkette chatcave is talking about sandwiches instead of the election. This is, somehow, slightly more helpful.

10:25: Dok Zoom: “Nevada is a simulacrum, so it could still be called for Luxembourg.” SEE WHAT I MEAN GUYS JESUS.

10:26: NYTimes election site is down again. It’s like having a zillion people clicking on things at one time is too much or something.

10:28: The remaining states (Florida Florida Florida Florida Florida) are too close to call right now. Time to commence stress-weeping.

10:29: Looks like tottering old Maryland Republican Rep. Roscoe Bartlett has lost, because of Democratic gerrymandering, and also because he forgot he was in Congress and went fishing for two years.

10:32: The CNN schmuck in Wisconsin didn’t get a super-mega-techwall. It’s a guy with a wall of clipboards. What a sport.

10:33: Josh F. chuck todd is talking about people in the “boiler room.”
i think that’s inherently funny.
are there actual boilers, and are NBC employees chained up there

Kaia M. namely, is luke russert there and does he have to be released?

(Note: This Wonket blogger covered the Democratic caucus, once upon a time, and Luke Russert was talking about football and then yelled “Speaker Pelosi” several times into the back of this blogger’s head.)

10:38: MAN there is a lot of text in this thing. Here’s a logo for D.C. bar Madam’s Organ:

(NSFW, sorry I guess)

It’s cool because if Obama wins, there’s a half-hour of open bar! If Romney wins, obviously, all bars must close.

10:44: Obama gets Minnesota!
Josh F. maybe that’s “funny”
“mitt romney put into the woodchipper, like in fargo”

10:45: We are still obsessing over Florida. Blair B. suspects it is the Pitbull announcement that has swung the 305.

10:47: CNN’s Don Lemon is inventing “bellwethers” in Ohio, and points us to the lovely people who are taking calls from election officials to tally the votes. These people look alarmingly distracted.

10:49: Finally, some zest!
Dok Z. FUCKING AKIN JUST ACCUSED OBAMA OF “ABANDONING AMERICANS TO TERRORISTS” in his FUCKING CONFESSION SPEECH

(We assume he meant “concession speech,” but what Todd Akin speech hasn’t been a confession speech?)

10:51: What is poor Todd going to do now that he has been unseated by vaginas? Is there any money in protesting at abortion clinics?

10:55: Wingnut update. Bachmann, in Minnesota, is probably very upset that gross Mooslem Rep. Keith Ellison got reelected, and is up by only 1.4 percent.

The Allen “Bald Eagle Balls” West rumble with Patrick Murphy is still too close to call; 91.5 percent of votes are in and West is up by 0.6 percent. We are frantically googling to figure out if it is too late to request an absentee Florida ballot.

10:58: Josh F. brian williams says he’s getting email from people INSIDE THE REPUBLICAN MACHINERY (robot slaves?) saying thatt they’re nervous about the remaining vote in VA

10:59: I never understood this. Who in Romney’s camp is so nervous that they spontaneously email Brian Williams?

11:00: CNN relieves its projection blue-balls by calling California for Obama, 3 seconds after polls close there.

Still waiting to see if Republican Rep. Mary Bono-Mack keeps her seat over there; her husband, Rep. Connie Mack, lost the Florida Senate race to Democrat Bill Nelson. That’s what happen when you run against a damn astronaut, and now neither has a job, maybe.

(Also, Connie Mack’s real name is Cornelius Harvey McGillicuddy IV. HA!)

11:05: Wolf Blitzer just told us the Democrats are expected to maintain control of the Senate!

And one of them, don’t forget, is a lesbian!

Don’t worry. The Republicans will still be able to filibuster.

11:08: CNN’s resident Republican Alex Castellanos just said he was “going for the hemlock.” His mustache is drooping, his voice is strained. Mayhaps this is the bellwether Don Lemon was telling us about?

11:11: Obama now at 249 electoral votes, per CNN, which is WHOA, WHOA. If he gets Florida, that puts him over the top. Others have 256 for Barry, which means Ohio is pretty important…

And now, just as something miraculous is set to happen, maybe, who knows, I must go! I relinquish the live-blooging back to Dok. Godspeed, wonkers, and don’t forget to hate Florida.

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664 comments

  1. Barbara_

    Sarah Palin is giving commentary on Fox News. She looks tired, dejected, lost and just plain dumb. Just wait until she hears the election results in all of the races for the first time!

    1. NellCote71

      Is there a remote chance she will finally be cut loose, to float a away on a cloud of metH-making smoke?

      1. Barbara_

        My husband turned Fox News on for a moment before I started screaming, "stop, stop, stop." He's never heard that before and he got confused.

    1. boskolives

      The bad news is that it seems like Mitch McConnell will get his dream and Obama will be a one term president, the good news is that the term will be 8 years long.

    1. NellCote71

      I gave my dog a Xanax.She frightens from whoops and screams. But I danced around with her first: who's the bestest little Obama dog? Who will not be strapped to the top of a car?

        1. Toomush_Infer

          Hey, if Florida doesn't declare soon, I'll be too drunk to care – told you you should come party at the Toomush residence….

          1. comrad_darkness

            I'm good, but thanks for the invite. I broke out the 35 year old scotch I save for guests. Then I added honey because that's how momma used to make them. And momma voted for Romney.

    1. Monsieur_Grumpe

      Florida has sunk into the gulf.
      Texas burst into flames.
      Mississippi has declared itself the Brain Power State.
      Newt Gingrich has converted to Unitarianism.
      Other than that nothing has happened.
      MG

    2. fuflans

      this is happening in our house too. i've got 6 windows open and mr fuf has three (he is always less dramatic).

      our old old old smc router is acting like a republican.

  2. Dr_Zoidberg

    Damn it, Wonkette, don't promise orgies and them make them just political orgies of comments. Got my assless chaps on for nothing.

      1. Dr_Zoidberg

        Yes, I possess a set of ladyparts, which of course affect everything I do in life, from voting to shopping.

    1. sewollef

      Ok, I'm holding my breath here a little.. Warren has won; Duckworth has won; Mourdock has lost; Akin has lost…. I'm liking this election so far!

    1. OzoneTom

      I think that Warren will be most effective in the Senate.

      Rather, I would put Gillibrand at the top of the ticket with Franken as the (other) attack dog.

      The Democrats have a window of opportunity to educate people about how the government works. And then go all FDR on the bitchez!

    1. Barbara_

      It should be done by the most expert mixologist and please, remember that the Absinthe ballot could give you a hungover chad.

    2. comrad_darkness

      1½ oz. rich white rum
      1½ oz. Dolin Vermouth Blanc (Martini & Rossi or Cinzano Bianco are fine substitutes)
      1 barspoon orange Curaçao or Grand Marnier
      ½ barspoon real grenadine
      Thinly cut orange peel
      Cracked ice
      Tools: barspoon, mixing glass, strainer
      Glass: cocktail
      Garnish: maraschino cherry (optional)

      From Imbibe Magazine

      Added: hm, "rich white" rum??

    1. NellCote71

      Really. The south and all. Luckily, Southern rape supporters are usually too drunk, stoned or stupid to remember the day, time and mobile home where they are actually supposed to vote.

  3. Blueb4sinrise

    I don't think Bamz is gonna carry Az. Go figure.
    Congress stuff pretty close, 'cept Raul Grijalva is pulling away .

    1. NellCote71

      He is doing better than expected from the state that gave us Leatherface Brewer and Sheriff air hole.

  4. OzoneTom

    Kerrey goes down in Nebraska, but at least he should bring out enough votes for one EC vote for the President.

    1. HarryButtle

      Not sure Kerrey was going to be much help, anyway. Might as well have the seat officially labeled as "hostile."

    1. valthemus

      At least my progressive friends in Virginia pay lower taxes. It's compensation for allowing themselves to be surrounded by sexist, racist, homophobic, bible-thumpin' dickwads.

  5. Lucidamente1

    Kos had this little gem:

    "Just saw a Mitt Romney ad in Columbus, on Fox. Polls closed 3 hours ago."

    Discuss.

    1. Nothingisamiss

      Last I heard he was leading. What channel are you watching/drug are you taking? I would LOVE to have that asshole fail again.

  6. smellyal8tr

    The only time on election night I watch Faux News is when they have to call it for Obama. It was classic stuff four years ago. Britt Hume choking it out. Sounds like tonight might be a little more bitter if they are already on track for "Race War" for the next four years instead of "Birther Patrol" that they've been on for the past four

    1. NellCote71

      I applaud you. Don't know if I would gut out. My finger starts twitching if it gets anywhere the Fox channel.

  7. smellyal8tr

    Florida still has people IN LINE to vote in Miami Dade County. Here's the funny part: voters were presented with a 12-page ballot in some counties (and probably told if they didn't vote the whole thing, it didn't count…I'd have marked Obama and left)

  8. Jerri

    I love how Tweety can't hold his bitching until they actually get to the commercial break. I have to say, he makes me nuts but I do love him on election night.

      1. 415buzzard

        He's been pretty good this election cycle, taken on a nice "I can't stomach Mittens" approach that I really like to watch…

    1. BoroPrimorac

      I can't imagine Puerto Rico ever becoming a state and turning into Hawaii. That would be the saddest shit ever. We'd lose our peculiar Spanish, our customs and our culture, for fuck's sake.

      1. Guppy

        The flag has been flying over Hawaii for about three weeks longer than Puerto Rico. If the island hasn't drastically changed by now…

  9. emmelemm

    So, all you glib East Coasters, with your states all called and everything, us West Coasters may not need to stress over whether our states will go for Bamz (they will), but we haven't even gotten our FIRST returns on our local races, initiatives and so forth.

    The nail biting continues!!!

    1. sewollef

      Yeh, yeh, yeh…. But just think how many more hours of drinking you get.

      I envy you lot, d'you know that?

  10. Limeylizzie

    Megyn Kelly to Rove: "Is this math you do as a Republican just to make yourself feel better, or is this real math?

    1. Chichikovovich

      When even the Fox boopsies are sticking the shiv in, you know it's going to be a long night, Karl.

    1. Chichikovovich

      Has a ticket ever lost all 5 of its home States before?
      And it would be all 6, if Ontario had any Electoral College votes.

  11. fuflans

    the economist soft right bloggers are all sad and saying it's over. tho they also point out:

    So many numbers," complains Megyn Kelly

    hee.

  12. SayItWithWookies

    PBS saying their exit poll scores Mitt with an unprecedented 7% among the black vote. I'm just wondering where they're finding these black people, because after Herman Cain and Clarence Thomas I don't know any other black people who might vote for him.

    1. Barbara_

      One more face lift and that bitch is going to have a goatee.
      Honey, which strand of pearls will you be wearing tonight? All of them.

  13. Terry

    John King says you have to look where the people are when considering voting patterns. Really?

    Cable is back.

  14. Biff

    Peggington of Nooninghamshire has resisted the urge to faint over the $6billion wasted on this election with no gains, declares Florida to be "as tight as a gnat's ass stretched over a snare drum".
    Nice turn of phrase, there.

  15. HobbesEvilTwin

    Fox News [sic] somehow got Peggy Nooooooonan out of her vicodin haze for an interview.
    Remind me why, again, we should care about her opinions*

    *w/o mentioning St. Ronnie of Reagan

      1. Dr. Nick Riviera

        Nah, the popular vote is only important when you have candidates ending in vowels and sometimes vowels

  16. boskolives

    Did Romney offer his lately completely invisible running mate Ryan as a sacrifice? If so, it's not working very well, maybe because people doubt he's actually running this time.

    1. FakaktaSouth

      Have y'all legalized it yet or what? And if so, remember I loved you before we could get weed legally and crash on your couch.

      1. weejee

        We have 12 minutes before the "polls" close. But we deported them and now use the Post Office, so how that matters I'm not sure, but the counters must keep mum until 8:00.

        1. emmelemm

          I b'leve they said they're making ONE announcement tonight, at 8:15, and then commencing counting ballots received today and shutting until tomorrow, at least.

    1. Chichikovovich

      Viennawoods13 – thank heaven's you're here. I can't find anything about what's happening in Gander-Twillingate or Nickel Belt.

  17. BumbleKid

    Charlie Pierce winning the twitter machine:
    Please baby Jeebus, you know I'm your amigo. Let Romney end up with 47 percent of the vote. #election2012

        1. bobbert

          Stone, in San Diego, makes quite a few good brews. AB reminds me of my favorite English bitter, Director's Club.

  18. courtneyesq

    Does anyone know how Jill Stein did tonight? My husband (who insists on calling himself a fiscal conservative, but is, in fact, a socialist) wants to know, as he voted for her….

  19. Blueb4sinrise

    Congress
    Ron Barber [nee Giffords] ahead of Martha McSally [fighter pilot] 52-47,
    still very early in count.

  20. IndianaKevin

    Robert Gibbs: When Repub. approval rating is lower than national drinking age, that's bad. No wonder he's a consultant!

  21. Barbara_

    Awesome tweet:
    Patton Oswalt ‏@pattonoswalt
    FOX News should play Karl Rove on with adorable oboe music & have a cartoon cupcake say, "What a smart little potato!" when he's done.

  22. snowpointsecret

    Wait we moved over here? Let me say it here too.

    Some man in a commercial comparing the Democrats to Socialist Hungary.

    … What?

  23. Badonkadonkette

    Chris Jansing reporting from a subdued, even dejected, Romney campaign HQ…she looks so pleased.

  24. Lazy Media

    Jaysus Fookin Cheerist. I am drunk to the point of New Orleans Mardi Grasness.

    Yet. Mittens has yet to defy a single Nate Silver prediction yet. Slang!

    1. Chichikovovich

      That would be the Dick Morris who predicted a Romney landslide and said there would be a massive day of reckoning for all the pundits who royally screwed the pooch, right? That Dick Morris?

      1. imissopus

        Yeah, that's the one. His Twitter has been getting steadily more desperate and way less optimistic over the last two hours. It's been fun to watch.

      2. bobbert

        Yeah. The one who will, nevertheless, still make more money punditing in a year than the median US citizen will make in his/her lifetime.

  25. Blueb4sinrise

    Sheriff Arpaio declares state of emergency in Maricopa County. No election results for his office will be counted.

    1. Simple J Malarkey

      If Obama wins Colorado and Iowa, seems he could lose Florida, Ohio, North Carolina and Virginia, and win the election. Of course, the Romney campaign is counting the votes in Colorado, so Ohio and/or Florida would be good to win. Too many damn states close enough to steal.

    2. bobbert

      Yeah but he's a wee effeminate,
      ……
      balls-on statistics nerd. (And I always use nerd as a compliment).

  26. kingofmeh

    most thoroughly counted state thus far: north carolina. with 95% of precincts reporting, election is running 50/49 R/O.

    nate silver's prediction for NC – 50/49 R/O.

    score one for the nerds.

    1. FlipFlopFuck

      The diseased weasel can go back to protesting outside abortion clinics….and spending more time with his family.

  27. Slim_Pickins

    Is it too soon to congratulate Joe Walsh on his imminent retirement? The only question now is whether he will move from his Congressional office suite to a homeless shelter.

      1. LePiston

        That fucker is tone deaf. I am waiting for Mittens to give his concession speech. I might throw my wine at the tv. TMI but I got my lady flu today and I think I am scaring my husband.

    1. Limeylizzie

      I just made a freakishly large and strong cup of coffee and am guzzling it just so I can scream at Egg and Mitt.

    2. bobbert

      Somebody be sure to get a youtube of the concession speech. It will be small recompense for the shitstorm of lies we've had to endure, but recompense still.

    1. Come here a minute

      Thanks for the heads up — watching the loser now! This is the first time I intentionally watched him!

  28. stew1

    Dick Morris should stick to sucking prostitute toes–his prognistication skills (Romney landslide!!!) are lacking.

  29. Lucidamente1

    Peggington Noonington just tweeted:

    "I suspect both Romney and Obama have a sense of what's coming, and it's part of why Romney looks so peaceful and Obama so roiled."

    Discuss.

  30. kingofmeh

    more "nate silver was right" evidence: delaware counted to 99% of precincts.

    outcome: O/R 59/40
    silver prediction: 60/40

  31. Blueb4sinrise

    Flake [Flake] leads Carmona {Surgeon General] for Kyl's [major fucking asshole] Senate Toilet.
    51- 44

    1. docterry6973

      I wonder how much Ol' Turdblossom pocketed out of all those hundreds of millions of dollars that passed through his hands.

  32. snowpointsecret

    Romney's VA lead only 25,000 now. Meanwhile, NC seeming to be getting too far out of reach for Obama to win there but not that big of a deal.

  33. smellyal8tr

    Repub friends are txting that FL is to be called for Obama just after 11 ET (even with people in line, I guess). Axelrod could barely contain his smile while on with MSNBC

  34. BaldarTFlagass

    It would be real cool if Elizabeth Warren would hold up three fingers behind her head, do the Tomahawk Chop, and sing the Atlanta Braves war chant during her victory speech.

  35. Limeylizzie

    Umm, this from Jodi Kantor on Twitter- When Romney lost to Kennedy he lay on the floor with a white lily and said "welcome to my funeral." What will he do tonight if he loses?

  36. AlterNewt

    Idiot Republican strategist patiently explains to BBC host:

    "You see, we, here in America, have what has traditionally been called the Gender Gap."

  37. prommie

    I can't keep up. I ain't drunk enough to howl at the moon about this, I ain't sober enough to make sense. I love you fakakta!

    1. FakaktaSouth

      I love you! Even if you told Chet you loved him first. But, of course, I love him too, so I understand. I wish you were with me, this would be funner.

  38. BloviateMe

    WTF? Too close to call in Oregon? God damn it…I'm drunk, so I'm gonna need a ride to go chew some ass.

      1. BloviateMe

        Still, hurts my feelings…they called Cally, Wash and Hawaii right away.

        It'll still go O, but damn it…………….

  39. natl_[redacted]_cmdr

    Not to harsh anyone's buzz, but I haven't seen any local peeps calling Wisc for Tammy Baldwin. Anyone see anybody besides focks news calling it?

  40. fuflans

    so deadbeat joe, macaca, naked scott and the rape boys demetrius and chiron (and i cannot BELIEVE i haven't made that connection before as i spent 2 years in that play) LOST.

    rock on america.

    1. tessiee

      Perhaps not the best choice; his nose is on sideways, which may cause it to get stuck between your bue-tocks.

  41. Not_Mother

    I wanna see that motherfucker Huckleberry on fox shaking his finger at the camera all yelling "You're going to hell, heathens, I TOLD YOU!!!" Also, not a word about the crime of the century, Benghazi-gate. I do declare.

  42. Jeffer

    Interesting Tweet:
    RT @rauldemolina: ABC News sources say that Jeb Bush told The Romney campaign that they lost Florida.

  43. IndianaKevin

    Faux News: Obama has been pandering to his base the the last four years. That's all he's been doing.

  44. sbj1964

    Let's hope we never have to hear about Mittens again until the neighbors start to complain about the smell next door.

  45. VeraSevera

    Tammy Baldwin. It means a lot. How much longer until even Wonkette finally has a proper dyke on staff?

  46. Toomush_Infer

    With NBC calling Ohio, I turned to Fake News to hear Lou Dobbs shaking his head: "These are peculiar times." Fuck you and fuck you, Lou – you and the whole Fake clan can stick your heads in the sand…..while the rest of us breathe a sigh of relief that your lying asses have not prevailed and you cannot fool all the people all the time….

  47. Willardbot9000_V2.5

    It's over! I know you all saw it too…but fuck you, ROMNEY! Fuck you and your fat head too!

    1. emmelemm

      Allll that money. All the children in America could have been fed, the sick healed, infrastructure rebuilt, R & D into cleaner energy… but no. FUCKING WASTED.

      (Still, in your face, bitches!)

  48. VeraSevera

    Whew. Thank gawd. THAT's over. Now back to PBS, The Monarchy: The Royal Family at Work. Now THAT's TV.

  49. Negropolis

    I can't find tears. I knew this was coming, but I still can't believe it. Hate has been defeated. They don't have to like him, they don't even have to respect him, but they are stuck with him, now, and a Democratic Senate to boot.

    I'm so over their shit. SO over.

    1. bobbert

      The Senate was a nice, and not really expected, bonus. I'd like (but don't expect) to see Dirty Harry change the filibuster rule to 55 at the start of the next session.

  50. MilwaukeeKent

    WOOT! WOOT! WOOT! The sweet justice of maybe 2 billion spent by the most reactionary of Hillbillynaires, for naught, If corporations were people, you might have won, Mitt.

  51. Terry

    Rove, the Koch Bros, the rest of them lied and spent millions and they still couldn't do it.

    God bless America, and I mean that sincerely.

  52. C_R_Eature

    I'm re-posting this from the last liveblog, because I didn't follow you all. Still true:

    I'm cracking open a bottle of year old Blueberry Mead. Happy Election, Everyone.

    I knew this already, but Barry really is right; Voting is the best Sweet Revenge.

    Hey Mitt: It's all over now, baby blue.

    Jesus fuck. I feel like we've all just averted catastrophe. And I'm exhausted.

  53. FakaktaSouth

    Bring on that crying bitch Ann, I wanna see the sadness of disappointment of the failure she has married. Fuck yeah, what a great night.

  54. Jerri

    Obama wins, Tammy Baldwin defeats the boy from Elroy to make history, and Paul Ryan as a national figure got a thumpin. I am a happy Wisconsin Democrat tonight!

  55. Negropolis

    This is the most unncessarily heavy lift for an incumbent president I've ever seen in my life. It shouldn't have been this difficult. Literally the day of his inaugeration congressional Republicans were in a damn-near literal lair plotting his political demise. My god, foru fucking years of this shit, and he couldn't be moved. Let him roar, goddamnit. Let him roar, and let it be heard from Paine to Hawaii.

    1. Dr. Nick Riviera

      And not just him. Straight up, as soon as he was elected, I was thinking "we have to win reelection or that will be interpreted as a fail of the first AA president"

      1. Negropolis

        Truly, the GOP wanted to make this a referendum on the "other" the "47%". We won. All of us, but especially us "others."

        1. Dr. Nick Riviera

          Even as happy as I was last election, this election was always floating in the back of my mind

    2. 102415

      I just feel so relieved. After 5 days of sitting in the dark and cold first I got the lights back on and now this.

      1. sudsmckenzie

        no way, they pumped 2 mill in when p90x entered to buy him off. Plus he hunts and seems to non coherent people what a coherent person sounds like.

  56. Limeylizzie

    What states haven't been called yet, how big a win will it be? I really want to see Mitt and Egg choke down their pride and have to concede and say something nice about Barry.

        1. Jukesgrrl

          At last, they had to.And Egg was wearing that “I've been crying all night” face, even though she didn't fulfill my wildest dream and breakdown on live TV.

  57. ChessieNefercat

    Somebody make mittens concede, please. I have to go to work in the morning and have foolishly switched from wine (box empty) to brandy or Cognac or Scotch or something fancy like that. My, my typing is getting better or can drunkenly outthink autogill.

    Make him conceeeeeeede….. autoFill

  58. tessiee

    Oh, my God!
    It's true!
    It's really true!
    All I can do is cry and say, "Thank you, God!" over and over.

  59. VeraSevera

    Fox is despondent. Bitter. Uber-bitchy. Despondent. Hardly enough will to live to sharpen their knives and take turns lunging it to old Mittens Agatha Christie style…praying that Obama will be able to save us from the fiscal cliff. Bitter. Let's do a fundraiser to buy them some sharpening stones.

  60. Negropolis

    OT: Locally here in Michigan, it looks like the urban area vote is finally coming in with about 40% counted. The emergency manager is going down along with all of the other initiatives, which is unfortunate for the three other liberal initiatives, but the EM law going down would be a HUGE blow to Snyder.

    Dems look to be picking up a seat on the state Supreme Court, which would give us control, I believe.

    MI-1 in the UP MAYBE might swing back Dem. MI-3 and MI-11 look lost, with MI-3 being closer than it should have been for Republicans.

    Stabenow beating Hokstra like a drum.

  61. Not_Mother

    More from the bunker: Rove melting, melting on FoxNews. Seems Mitt won Ohio after all in alternative reality. Baier & Kelly mortified.

    Bitter? EAT SHIT AND DIE

  62. VeraSevera

    Lesson of Ohio (and Midwest): (1) The next chapter of Racism in American just might not be as ugly as the last. (2) Some faint residual class consciousness is still capable of overcoming racism. Mittens and Detroit: Bad. Black guy who saves the auto industry. Not so bad.

  63. Dr. Nick Riviera

    DIRT DOESNT VOTE JOHN KING. Doesn't matter that the 2 people that live in 10 square miles vote republican and make the map all red

  64. Not_Mother

    Hahahaha@realDonaldTrump: This election is a total sham and a travesty. We are not a democracy! Megyn Kelly suggests having Karl Rove "duke it out" with the decision desk. CNN JOHN King first to say "civil war" coming. Romney still sore loser motherfucker.

    1. FeloniousMonk

      Fox is also showing numbers that mean Ohio shouldn't have been called yet, and it's the only news channel they'll put on here. I can't find anything reliable on the net because I'm a dumbshit. Reassure me, please; this is done and dusted?

      1. sullivanst

        Rachel just explained, there are 750,000 votes outstanding in counties that Obama's winning 60:40; only 200,000 votes outstanding in Romney counties.

  65. VeraSevera

    It's funny. I thoughy, if Mittens win I'm going out and throwing rocks. But now I feel like throwing rocks…anyway. I'm I a bad person?

  66. sullivanst

    Call Nevada and Florida already, and make Ohio irrelevant.

    Seriously, I've looked at the breakdown of outstanding votes in Florida, and I cannot for the life of me understand why it hasn't been called already.

  67. ttommyunger

    Am I the only one besides George Stuffalotofstuff who noticed Dianne Sawyer was shit-faced last night?

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