WE ARE STILL HERE SEND MOUNTAIN DEW  10:14 pm November 6, 2012

Wonking Your Face Off: The Live-Bloog Experience, Part III

by Rich Abdill

BLOG BLOG BLOG BLOG *thud*AAAAAND WE’RE BACK! Hello, Wonketteers, and welcome to our election-night orgy of zingers and Wolf Blitzer insults. We have broken it up into hour-long posts, to prevent these things from getting too long and unwieldy. We don’t have those fancy tools like the New York Times, which, for what it’s worth, has been not working for, like, a while on election night.

Part 1, from the Good Doktor, is still around, as is Part 2, from the Kaia Mursi.

OK OK enough nonsense, let’s get to the bloog!

10:05: Richard “Rape Is God’s Will” Mourdoch lost in Indiana AND Todd “Legitimate Rape” Akin just lost Missouri. Hooray! The electorate is so smart!

10:06: Well, maybe. Remember Georgia Rep. Paul Broun? The one who said evolution and embryology were sent from hell to suck us away from Jesus? He ran unopposed.

10:07: Doktor Zoom swings in with “Akin now ‘officially’ a sucky sucky LOSER.” He then yells something about Warren/Franken 2016 and leaves.

10:17: What the hell is going on down in Florida? There are around nine votes separating Romney and Obama, and some crazy shiz is going down near Tampa. It is not clear.

BUT! They will not be amending their state constitution to abolish the separation of church and state, so that’s good for those folks down there. Except that they still have to live in Florida.

10:21: Josh F. tells us CBS has declared Tim Kaine the winner in the Virginia Senate race, which is a shame, since George “Macaca” Allen would have given us something to actually write about.

10:23: CNN analysts now just saying “Florida” over and over again. This is not as helpful. Also, the Wonkette chatcave is talking about sandwiches instead of the election. This is, somehow, slightly more helpful.

10:25: Dok Zoom: “Nevada is a simulacrum, so it could still be called for Luxembourg.” SEE WHAT I MEAN GUYS JESUS.

10:26: NYTimes election site is down again. It’s like having a zillion people clicking on things at one time is too much or something.

10:28: The remaining states (Florida Florida Florida Florida Florida) are too close to call right now. Time to commence stress-weeping.

10:29: Looks like tottering old Maryland Republican Rep. Roscoe Bartlett has lost, because of Democratic gerrymandering, and also because he forgot he was in Congress and went fishing for two years.

10:32: The CNN schmuck in Wisconsin didn’t get a super-mega-techwall. It’s a guy with a wall of clipboards. What a sport.

10:33: Josh F. chuck todd is talking about people in the “boiler room.”
i think that’s inherently funny.
are there actual boilers, and are NBC employees chained up there

Kaia M. namely, is luke russert there and does he have to be released?

(Note: This Wonket blogger covered the Democratic caucus, once upon a time, and Luke Russert was talking about football and then yelled “Speaker Pelosi” several times into the back of this blogger’s head.)

10:38: MAN there is a lot of text in this thing. Here’s a logo for D.C. bar Madam’s Organ:

(NSFW, sorry I guess)

It’s cool because if Obama wins, there’s a half-hour of open bar! If Romney wins, obviously, all bars must close.

10:44: Obama gets Minnesota!
Josh F. maybe that’s “funny”
“mitt romney put into the woodchipper, like in fargo”

10:45: We are still obsessing over Florida. Blair B. suspects it is the Pitbull announcement that has swung the 305.

10:47: CNN’s Don Lemon is inventing “bellwethers” in Ohio, and points us to the lovely people who are taking calls from election officials to tally the votes. These people look alarmingly distracted.

10:49: Finally, some zest!
Dok Z. FUCKING AKIN JUST ACCUSED OBAMA OF “ABANDONING AMERICANS TO TERRORISTS” in his FUCKING CONFESSION SPEECH

(We assume he meant “concession speech,” but what Todd Akin speech hasn’t been a confession speech?)

10:51: What is poor Todd going to do now that he has been unseated by vaginas? Is there any money in protesting at abortion clinics?

10:55: Wingnut update. Bachmann, in Minnesota, is probably very upset that gross Mooslem Rep. Keith Ellison got reelected, and is up by only 1.4 percent.

The Allen “Bald Eagle Balls” West rumble with Patrick Murphy is still too close to call; 91.5 percent of votes are in and West is up by 0.6 percent. We are frantically googling to figure out if it is too late to request an absentee Florida ballot.

10:58: Josh F. brian williams says he’s getting email from people INSIDE THE REPUBLICAN MACHINERY (robot slaves?) saying thatt they’re nervous about the remaining vote in VA

10:59: I never understood this. Who in Romney’s camp is so nervous that they spontaneously email Brian Williams?

11:00: CNN relieves its projection blue-balls by calling California for Obama, 3 seconds after polls close there.

Still waiting to see if Republican Rep. Mary Bono-Mack keeps her seat over there; her husband, Rep. Connie Mack, lost the Florida Senate race to Democrat Bill Nelson. That’s what happen when you run against a damn astronaut, and now neither has a job, maybe.

(Also, Connie Mack’s real name is Cornelius Harvey McGillicuddy IV. HA!)

11:05: Wolf Blitzer just told us the Democrats are expected to maintain control of the Senate!

And one of them, don’t forget, is a lesbian!

Don’t worry. The Republicans will still be able to filibuster.

11:08: CNN’s resident Republican Alex Castellanos just said he was “going for the hemlock.” His mustache is drooping, his voice is strained. Mayhaps this is the bellwether Don Lemon was telling us about?

11:11: Obama now at 249 electoral votes, per CNN, which is WHOA, WHOA. If he gets Florida, that puts him over the top. Others have 256 for Barry, which means Ohio is pretty important…

And now, just as something miraculous is set to happen, maybe, who knows, I must go! I relinquish the live-blooging back to Dok. Godspeed, wonkers, and don’t forget to hate Florida.

 
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Hola wonkerados.

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Also, if you are a new commenter, your comment may never appear. This is probably because we hate you.

{ 664 comments }

Barbara_ November 6, 2012 at 10:17 pm

Sarah Palin is giving commentary on Fox News. She looks tired, dejected, lost and just plain dumb. Just wait until she hears the election results in all of the races for the first time!

rocktonsam November 6, 2012 at 10:19 pm

she needs to get laid

Barbara_ November 6, 2012 at 10:21 pm

For all of us who've shouted, "Fuck you, Palin!" we agree.

Nothingisamiss November 6, 2012 at 10:24 pm

I don't think that would help her. But it will help me, always.

Terry November 6, 2012 at 10:29 pm

Her husband's business partner must be out of town or locked up.

starfanglednut November 6, 2012 at 10:39 pm

I would not hit that.

Jeffer November 6, 2012 at 10:19 pm

Robert Gibbs is radiating confidence, even while he says he's not.

Barbara_ November 6, 2012 at 10:20 pm

Hello, Pokeypie. Thanks for all of the drinky-poos tonight.

Jeffer November 6, 2012 at 10:28 pm

Welcomes! Tacos and Beer! An election night tradition!

NellCote71 November 6, 2012 at 10:20 pm

Is there a remote chance she will finally be cut loose, to float a away on a cloud of metH-making smoke?

Butch_Wagstaff November 6, 2012 at 10:35 pm

I fucking hope so.

ChillBill November 6, 2012 at 10:22 pm

And you are watching Fox News because…

IceCreamEmpress November 6, 2012 at 10:23 pm

It's schadenfreudelicious!

Barbara_ November 6, 2012 at 10:27 pm

My husband turned Fox News on for a moment before I started screaming, "stop, stop, stop." He's never heard that before and he got confused.

comrad_darkness November 6, 2012 at 10:27 pm

Higher concentration of the Schade that Freundes. I'm guessing.

Jeffer November 6, 2012 at 10:31 pm

Because I enjoy watching their growing sense of doom and despair. That's not a good thing. Is it?

bobbert November 6, 2012 at 10:36 pm

But the screeching and whining, how you stand it?

Monsieur_Grumpe November 6, 2012 at 10:22 pm

I think you mean dumber?

Jeffer November 6, 2012 at 10:39 pm

Gibbs is grinning like a maniac on Fox news. This is fun!

Yellerdawg November 6, 2012 at 10:47 pm

Is Alaska still a state ? I haven't heard them mentioned.

Slim_Pickins November 6, 2012 at 10:50 pm

I thought that was the meth talkin, especially the dumb part.

zedbot November 6, 2012 at 10:52 pm

Sarah, you ignorant slut.

Lot_49 November 6, 2012 at 10:17 pm

Chuck Todd is moving his little tiles around again. Mittens es tostado

boskolives November 6, 2012 at 10:44 pm

The bad news is that it seems like Mitch McConnell will get his dream and Obama will be a one term president, the good news is that the term will be 8 years long.

BoatOfVelociraptors November 6, 2012 at 10:17 pm

I am yelling anyways!

mille derps November 6, 2012 at 10:28 pm

I was wondering who that was…

Designer_Rants November 6, 2012 at 10:55 pm

I kinda like it. Drowns out the hum of my computer's fan as I click refresh on the NY Times map that isn't working.

NellCote71 November 6, 2012 at 10:33 pm

I gave my dog a Xanax.She frightens from whoops and screams. But I danced around with her first: who's the bestest little Obama dog? Who will not be strapped to the top of a car?

imissopus November 6, 2012 at 10:18 pm

That gif wins the internet for tonight.

emmelemm November 6, 2012 at 10:28 pm

Ha! Agreed.

Terry November 6, 2012 at 10:18 pm

My cable and Internet are kaput, relying on you all for updates!

Dr_Zoidberg November 6, 2012 at 10:19 pm

Breaking news – I'm awesome!

Terry November 6, 2012 at 10:21 pm

Hon, I knew that!

Fare la Volpe November 6, 2012 at 10:24 pm

I mentally end all of your comments with a WOOP WOOP WOOWOOWOOWOOP

Worth it.

Dr_Zoidberg November 6, 2012 at 10:28 pm

Yay! People are paying attention to me!

Chet Kincaid_ November 6, 2012 at 10:35 pm

What else aren't you wearing?

comrad_darkness November 6, 2012 at 10:28 pm

Breaking news – I'm glad I'm alone because I didn't stock up for this evening.

Toomush_Infer November 6, 2012 at 10:40 pm

Hey, if Florida doesn't declare soon, I'll be too drunk to care – told you you should come party at the Toomush residence….

comrad_darkness November 6, 2012 at 10:55 pm

I'm good, but thanks for the invite. I broke out the 35 year old scotch I save for guests. Then I added honey because that's how momma used to make them. And momma voted for Romney.

Monsieur_Grumpe November 6, 2012 at 10:21 pm

Florida has sunk into the gulf.
Texas burst into flames.
Mississippi has declared itself the Brain Power State.
Newt Gingrich has converted to Unitarianism.
Other than that nothing has happened.
MG

NellCote71 November 6, 2012 at 10:35 pm

"Texas burst into flames." So summer 2011.

Lot_49 November 6, 2012 at 10:21 pm

And how will you get said updates–are you dialing up?

fuflans November 6, 2012 at 10:24 pm

this is happening in our house too. i've got 6 windows open and mr fuf has three (he is always less dramatic).

our old old old smc router is acting like a republican.

starfanglednut November 6, 2012 at 10:50 pm

It's complaining incessantly?

BadKitty904 November 6, 2012 at 10:25 pm

Mammon at bay, Babylon o'erthrown, etc.

Come here a minute November 6, 2012 at 10:26 pm

Kaine now up by 0.5 according to Board of Elections.

Dr_Zoidberg November 6, 2012 at 10:18 pm

Damn it, Wonkette, don't promise orgies and them make them just political orgies of comments. Got my assless chaps on for nothing.

BadKitty904 November 6, 2012 at 10:20 pm

Um…

Dr_Zoidberg November 6, 2012 at 10:25 pm

Ok, admittedly, this is normal Tuesday evening clothing…

BadKitty904 November 6, 2012 at 10:27 pm

Well, that paints a vivid picture, indeed…

Fare la Volpe November 6, 2012 at 10:22 pm

All chaps are assless, sir. *adjusts monocle*

-Pervertopedia

Chet Kincaid_ November 6, 2012 at 10:22 pm

(smack!) Rosey-cheeked now?
(EDIT: This will be mighty em-bare-assing if you did NOT declare yourself as a Lady, as I seem to recall.)

Dr_Zoidberg November 6, 2012 at 10:30 pm

Yes, I possess a set of ladyparts, which of course affect everything I do in life, from voting to shopping.

Toomush_Infer November 6, 2012 at 10:42 pm

Um, all right, now I'm awake again….

Dr_Zoidberg November 6, 2012 at 10:43 pm

Hi there!

Actually, Dr. Zoidberg (the cartoon)'s awesomeness transcends gender norms.

Mittens Howell, III November 6, 2012 at 10:28 pm

*spank*

IndianaKevin November 6, 2012 at 10:29 pm

Putting assless chaps on is never a waste of time. Right, Barb?

starfanglednut November 6, 2012 at 10:51 pm

Wait, I thought you weren't wearing pants.

Mumbletypeg November 6, 2012 at 10:18 pm

Akin… Mourdock…

Hell hath no fury like a vagina scorned, mister.

Terry November 6, 2012 at 10:22 pm

Tammy beat Joe Walsh, too!

sewollef November 6, 2012 at 11:09 pm

Ok, I'm holding my breath here a little.. Warren has won; Duckworth has won; Mourdock has lost; Akin has lost…. I'm liking this election so far!

bobbert November 6, 2012 at 11:24 pm

Baldwin has won.

Sharkey November 6, 2012 at 10:19 pm

Take it easy Kermit!

With so much to give, understand me sugar

Gratuitous World November 6, 2012 at 10:19 pm

Duckworth! long overdue

ChillBill November 6, 2012 at 10:19 pm

So now that Scott Brown is down and out, is he gonna go back to being Richard Gere's stunt cock?

starfanglednut November 6, 2012 at 10:52 pm

He can go back to jerking off in his stupid truck for all I care.

GeorgiaBurning November 6, 2012 at 11:17 pm

He should give Palin a call, she's ready

Gratuitous World November 6, 2012 at 10:19 pm

Joe Walsh: Deadbeat Lame Duck

comrad_darkness November 6, 2012 at 10:34 pm

My god, he'll have to get a real job.

Toomush_Infer November 6, 2012 at 10:42 pm

Maybe now he can go to jail for lack of child support….

docterry6973 November 6, 2012 at 10:49 pm

I hope that I never, ever hear about this sad sack again.

HarryButtle November 6, 2012 at 10:19 pm

I'm ready to volunteer for Warren/Franken 2016…where do i sign up?

NellCote71 November 6, 2012 at 10:25 pm

We have a LOT of good people for 2016, not like the loser Repug line-up of 2012.

doloras November 6, 2012 at 10:32 pm

What do you mean? I just signed up for the Franken/Warren ticket!

OzoneTom November 6, 2012 at 10:36 pm

I think that Warren will be most effective in the Senate.

Rather, I would put Gillibrand at the top of the ticket with Franken as the (other) attack dog.

The Democrats have a window of opportunity to educate people about how the government works. And then go all FDR on the bitchez!

docterry6973 November 6, 2012 at 10:51 pm

Still holding out for Hillary.

Angry_Marmot November 6, 2012 at 10:53 pm

Sanders / Warren (in any combination) and you've got a deal.

BadKitty904 November 6, 2012 at 10:20 pm

Dude. What tha hell's goin on with Kermit?

Mittens Howell, III November 6, 2012 at 10:24 pm

he's crazier than a diebold computer screen

BadKitty904 November 6, 2012 at 10:26 pm

Dang.

IndianaKevin November 6, 2012 at 10:37 pm

His mic is malfunctioning, so you can't hear him, but he's singing in 247/4 time.

rocktonsam November 6, 2012 at 10:20 pm

come on ohio!!

starfanglednut November 6, 2012 at 11:03 pm

Drink!

OKthennext November 6, 2012 at 10:20 pm

How do you mix an El Presidente?

Nothingisamiss November 6, 2012 at 10:26 pm

I've been waiting for the answer to this question.

Barbara_ November 6, 2012 at 10:31 pm

It should be done by the most expert mixologist and please, remember that the Absinthe ballot could give you a hungover chad.

comrad_darkness November 6, 2012 at 10:43 pm

1½ oz. rich white rum
1½ oz. Dolin Vermouth Blanc (Martini & Rossi or Cinzano Bianco are fine substitutes)
1 barspoon orange Curaçao or Grand Marnier
½ barspoon real grenadine
Thinly cut orange peel
Cracked ice
Tools: barspoon, mixing glass, strainer
Glass: cocktail
Garnish: maraschino cherry (optional)

From Imbibe Magazine

Added: hm, "rich white" rum??

SayItWithWookies November 6, 2012 at 10:20 pm

Things are looking bad for the Party of Rape. I just wonder why it took this long.

Dr_Zoidberg November 6, 2012 at 10:26 pm

Well, they were asking for it.

starfanglednut November 6, 2012 at 10:54 pm

Did you see the skirt they were wearing? And walking in that neighborhood at night?

NellCote71 November 6, 2012 at 10:28 pm

Really. The south and all. Luckily, Southern rape supporters are usually too drunk, stoned or stupid to remember the day, time and mobile home where they are actually supposed to vote.

FlipFlopFuck November 6, 2012 at 10:41 pm

It's Godwin's will.

Lucidamente1 November 6, 2012 at 10:20 pm

JOE WALSH DEFEATED! (Bad news for Wonkette?)

FNMA November 6, 2012 at 10:23 pm

Well, playing with the Eagles for the paycheck did seem to break his spirit.

iburl November 6, 2012 at 10:24 pm

Funk #49 for Wonkette

ChillBill November 6, 2012 at 10:25 pm

This is good news for people who hate the fucking Eagles.

bobbert November 6, 2012 at 10:28 pm

We'll live with it.

Chet Kincaid_ November 6, 2012 at 10:33 pm

Who will menace suburban Chicago diner and bar patrons into silence with ludicrous moron-bravado now?!

Lucidamente1 November 6, 2012 at 10:35 pm

Rod Blagojevich in 2026?

viennawoods13 November 6, 2012 at 10:36 pm

Is that when he gets out?

imissopus November 6, 2012 at 10:37 pm

Aaron Rodgers?

SayItWithWookies November 6, 2012 at 10:21 pm

Obama wins New Mexico — not much of a surprise, but it's still a few electoral votes.

Blueb4sinrise November 6, 2012 at 10:21 pm

I don't think Bamz is gonna carry Az. Go figure.
Congress stuff pretty close, 'cept Raul Grijalva is pulling away .

NellCote71 November 6, 2012 at 10:40 pm

He is doing better than expected from the state that gave us Leatherface Brewer and Sheriff air hole.

OzoneTom November 6, 2012 at 10:21 pm

Kerrey goes down in Nebraska, but at least he should bring out enough votes for one EC vote for the President.

HarryButtle November 6, 2012 at 10:29 pm

Not sure Kerrey was going to be much help, anyway. Might as well have the seat officially labeled as "hostile."

Angry_Marmot November 6, 2012 at 10:58 pm

I thought Kerrey went down on Deb– never mind.

imissopus November 6, 2012 at 10:22 pm

And Macacca goes down, apparently?

SayItWithWookies November 6, 2012 at 10:27 pm

Too close to call still, is what I'm seeing.

Terry November 6, 2012 at 10:32 pm

Tied

valthemus November 6, 2012 at 11:20 pm

At least my progressive friends in Virginia pay lower taxes. It's compensation for allowing themselves to be surrounded by sexist, racist, homophobic, bible-thumpin' dickwads.

Sharkey November 6, 2012 at 10:23 pm

To be fair, my face was not really on, to begin with.

VodkaGoGo November 6, 2012 at 10:23 pm

Diane Sawyer looks like she needs to drop a duece, bad.

Barbara_ November 6, 2012 at 10:35 pm

This election impacts us all.

bobbert November 6, 2012 at 10:40 pm

Damn, you're good.

Barbara_ November 6, 2012 at 10:41 pm

Yeah, good and buzzed.

Oblios_Cap November 6, 2012 at 10:24 pm

Damn! I'm too drunk to keep up with these blog changes. let's just crash the Interwebs, okay?

OzoneTom November 6, 2012 at 10:28 pm

Nice that Wonkette Corporation was able to take over the New York Times server farm!

Oblios_Cap November 6, 2012 at 10:24 pm

Karl Rove, pure shithead.

BoroPrimorac November 6, 2012 at 10:28 pm

You saw that? Cincinnati suburbs my dick.

boskolives November 6, 2012 at 10:30 pm

Assume he next will be seen blowing illegals @ $10.00 a Chevy-full, at least until another Bush gets out of rehab, I'm looking at you Jenna!

NellCote71 November 6, 2012 at 10:43 pm

That is my personal Dream Act. Or Karl Rove on the receiving end of a donkey act in Ojinaga.

bobbert November 6, 2012 at 10:25 pm

As a salute to the loser, I'ma have an Arrogant Bastard before I switch to red wine.

NellCote71 November 6, 2012 at 10:44 pm

You are having a mitt Romney?

DixvilleCrotch November 6, 2012 at 10:25 pm

"This is a game of inches" someone just said on the teevee.

iburl November 6, 2012 at 10:26 pm

Dick Morris?

Oblios_Cap November 6, 2012 at 10:26 pm

I'll give 6 of mine.

NellCote71 November 6, 2012 at 10:44 pm

Call me. Maybe?

BadKitty904 November 6, 2012 at 10:27 pm

As are many, if you know what I mean and I think you do…

FlipFlopFuck November 6, 2012 at 10:42 pm

You know who else plays golf?

Nothingisamiss November 6, 2012 at 10:25 pm

Duckworth, Warren. Ironically liberals with balls.

NellCote71 November 6, 2012 at 10:46 pm

McKaskill, too.

Lucidamente1 November 6, 2012 at 10:25 pm

Kos had this little gem:

"Just saw a Mitt Romney ad in Columbus, on Fox. Polls closed 3 hours ago."

Discuss.

OzoneTom November 6, 2012 at 10:26 pm

You can't take it with you.

iburl November 6, 2012 at 10:27 pm

It's to boost the morale of the hackers switching the totals.

Lucidamente1 November 6, 2012 at 10:28 pm

I just realized: it's like converting other people's dead ancestors.

redarmyzombie November 6, 2012 at 10:30 pm

Assume Mitt Loser.

BadKitty904 November 6, 2012 at 10:37 pm

Ha!

BoroPrimorac November 6, 2012 at 10:34 pm

They got fucking fleeced.

ChillBill November 6, 2012 at 10:39 pm

Well, all that Rove and Koch money is not gonna spend itself.

fuflans November 6, 2012 at 10:25 pm

wait! is it true? is macaca done?

Nothingisamiss November 6, 2012 at 10:28 pm

Last I heard he was leading. What channel are you watching/drug are you taking? I would LOVE to have that asshole fail again.

Limeylizzie November 6, 2012 at 10:29 pm

Just heard CBS called it for Tim Kaine.

Monsieur_Grumpe November 6, 2012 at 10:31 pm

I heard Maca was ahead.

smellyal8tr November 6, 2012 at 10:26 pm

The only time on election night I watch Faux News is when they have to call it for Obama. It was classic stuff four years ago. Britt Hume choking it out. Sounds like tonight might be a little more bitter if they are already on track for "Race War" for the next four years instead of "Birther Patrol" that they've been on for the past four

Monsieur_Grumpe November 6, 2012 at 10:30 pm

Sweet ain't it.

NellCote71 November 6, 2012 at 10:49 pm

I applaud you. Don't know if I would gut out. My finger starts twitching if it gets anywhere the Fox channel.

Mittens Howell, III November 6, 2012 at 10:27 pm

Currently watching Schadenfox News

UW8316154 November 6, 2012 at 10:27 pm

Aw Jaysus, not another Florida recount – we've seen how that has worked out in 2000.

Shiver.

Monsieur_Grumpe November 6, 2012 at 10:29 pm

Hanging.
Chads.
Erp!

elgin_pelican November 7, 2012 at 2:46 pm

Uh, I think that's the same count, now in its 144th month.

Terry November 6, 2012 at 10:27 pm

Come on CNN, call a few of these states blue

weejee November 6, 2012 at 10:32 pm

CNN is chicken. ABC already called Minnesota for Barry.

Monsieur_Grumpe November 6, 2012 at 10:28 pm

From Minnesota:
25% reporting
Bachmann (Insane) 51%
Garves (Sort of Normal) 49%

weejee November 6, 2012 at 10:31 pm

Is it the wild rice that's at work here?

smellyal8tr November 6, 2012 at 10:28 pm

Florida still has people IN LINE to vote in Miami Dade County. Here's the funny part: voters were presented with a 12-page ballot in some counties (and probably told if they didn't vote the whole thing, it didn't count…I'd have marked Obama and left)

Veritas78 November 6, 2012 at 10:28 pm

Polls held open until 11 p.m. in Virginia.

Maman November 6, 2012 at 10:28 pm

Luxembourg LIBEL! And I am not just saying that because my children could claim citizenship there if things get bad here

Mittens Howell, III November 6, 2012 at 10:29 pm

Olds in scooters rioting in the streets tomorrow.

Veritas78 November 6, 2012 at 10:33 pm

Hope they've stocked up on their heart pills.

FlipFlopFuck November 6, 2012 at 10:43 pm

And their vouchers.

Jerri November 6, 2012 at 10:29 pm

I love how Tweety can't hold his bitching until they actually get to the commercial break. I have to say, he makes me nuts but I do love him on election night.

Limeylizzie November 6, 2012 at 10:33 pm

I love him, I love his crazy passion for politics and his mad old-timey movie references.

415buzzard November 6, 2012 at 10:38 pm

He's been pretty good this election cycle, taken on a nice "I can't stomach Mittens" approach that I really like to watch…

Toomush_Infer November 6, 2012 at 10:44 pm

Yeah, I think he's snorted too much coke today…he couldn't shut up by noon….

Jerri November 6, 2012 at 10:47 pm

Yep. His pure joy on election night is one of my favorite things in the world.

Limeylizzie November 6, 2012 at 10:51 pm

I really enjoy the fact that he hates Mitt, Rove and those bastards.

Jerri November 6, 2012 at 10:57 pm

That's rather pleasant too.

Guppy November 6, 2012 at 10:30 pm

Official Puerto Rico referendum results (in English) here.

Long story short, "No" means asking for statehood.

BoroPrimorac November 6, 2012 at 10:36 pm

Estado Libre y Asociado, Compai.

Oblios_Cap November 6, 2012 at 10:41 pm

Damn! They'll shoot up the Capitol again.

I can make a fortune making 51 star flags!

Chichikovovich November 6, 2012 at 11:16 pm

Let's keep the 50 state flag. Let South Carolina take a mulligan on the whole secession thing.

Steverino247 November 6, 2012 at 10:55 pm

Puerto Ricans are just asking for it, you say?

Guppy November 6, 2012 at 11:00 pm

"No" means "sí."

BoroPrimorac November 6, 2012 at 11:01 pm

I can't imagine Puerto Rico ever becoming a state and turning into Hawaii. That would be the saddest shit ever. We'd lose our peculiar Spanish, our customs and our culture, for fuck's sake.

Guppy November 6, 2012 at 11:08 pm

The flag has been flying over Hawaii for about three weeks longer than Puerto Rico. If the island hasn't drastically changed by now…

emmelemm November 6, 2012 at 10:30 pm

So, all you glib East Coasters, with your states all called and everything, us West Coasters may not need to stress over whether our states will go for Bamz (they will), but we haven't even gotten our FIRST returns on our local races, initiatives and so forth.

The nail biting continues!!!

bobbert November 6, 2012 at 10:46 pm

Also, too, the drinking.

That can't be just me.

sewollef November 6, 2012 at 11:17 pm

Yeh, yeh, yeh…. But just think how many more hours of drinking you get.

I envy you lot, d'you know that?

Mittens Howell, III November 6, 2012 at 10:30 pm

Pizza man wheres my pizza!!

PIIIZZZAMAAAAN!!

HouseOfTheBlueLights November 6, 2012 at 10:33 pm

You should be making your own pizza, like all good communists.

Limeylizzie November 6, 2012 at 10:36 pm

That is so fucking excellent and also insane!

VodkaGoGo November 6, 2012 at 10:30 pm

Hey, I just noticed Dancing With The Stars isn't on. WHAT THE FUCK AMERICA?

Mumbletypeg November 6, 2012 at 10:33 pm

Some of us missed Jeopardy!, too.

102415 November 6, 2012 at 11:21 pm

Mr. 102415 was furious for ten minutes over NO JEPURDY!?

Limeylizzie November 6, 2012 at 10:31 pm

Megyn Kelly to Rove: "Is this math you do as a Republican just to make yourself feel better, or is this real math?

VodkaGoGo November 6, 2012 at 10:37 pm

Ooooh I missed that. I'm putting that in the spank bank for later.

Chichikovovich November 6, 2012 at 10:49 pm

When even the Fox boopsies are sticking the shiv in, you know it's going to be a long night, Karl.

natl_[redacted]_cmdr November 6, 2012 at 10:31 pm

Minnesota goes blue!

Limeylizzie November 6, 2012 at 10:31 pm

Megyn Kelly to Rove: "Is this math you do as a Republican just to make yourself feel better

C_R_Eature November 6, 2012 at 11:26 pm

Mathsturbation.

Limeylizzie November 6, 2012 at 10:32 pm

Man, Tan Man Boner was shit-faced in that concession speech.

bobbert November 6, 2012 at 10:43 pm

Wut? Certainly Boner dinna lose?

Limeylizzie November 6, 2012 at 10:45 pm

Sorry, just my dreams, his acceptance speech.

trampndirtdown November 6, 2012 at 10:46 pm

Assuming she meant Sen. Stapledick.

tessiee November 6, 2012 at 11:30 pm

And this is different from every other day, how?

VodkaGoGo November 6, 2012 at 10:32 pm

WI for Bammerz. Damn, Romney/Ryan is a fucking horrible ticket.

Chichikovovich November 6, 2012 at 10:50 pm

Has a ticket ever lost all 5 of its home States before?
And it would be all 6, if Ontario had any Electoral College votes.

102415 November 6, 2012 at 11:23 pm

That's funny.

fuflans November 6, 2012 at 10:32 pm

the economist soft right bloggers are all sad and saying it's over. tho they also point out:

So many numbers," complains Megyn Kelly

hee.

imissopus November 6, 2012 at 10:34 pm

She also apparently said ""Is this just math you do as a Republican to make you feel better, or is it real?" Which is just awesome.

emmelemm November 6, 2012 at 10:36 pm

Dumbest fucking person ever.

Chet Kincaid_ November 6, 2012 at 10:58 pm

"Me-Gyn no understand counting things!"

Dr_Zoidberg November 6, 2012 at 10:35 pm

'Math is hard! Tee-hee!"

bobbert November 6, 2012 at 10:38 pm

Do you think Megyn has a pull-tab on her back?

'Cause, I'm good with that.

NellCote71 November 6, 2012 at 10:57 pm

It perhaps us not her fault, but anyone who spells her name Megyn should reconsider.

BadKitty904 November 6, 2012 at 10:33 pm

"Tonight, on Fox! Wailing and gnashing of teeth!"

Oblios_Cap November 6, 2012 at 10:36 pm

My favorite show!

bobbert November 6, 2012 at 10:42 pm

Now, if they had some rending of clothes, I might watch for a while.

weejee November 6, 2012 at 10:46 pm

If they were true patriots they'd commit Seppuku with the cameras running.

NellCote71 November 6, 2012 at 10:58 pm

With votes, of course.

Butch_Wagstaff November 6, 2012 at 10:47 pm

Much pulling of tufts out of wigs?

rocktonsam November 6, 2012 at 10:34 pm

COME ON OHIO!

SayItWithWookies November 6, 2012 at 10:34 pm

PBS saying their exit poll scores Mitt with an unprecedented 7% among the black vote. I'm just wondering where they're finding these black people, because after Herman Cain and Clarence Thomas I don't know any other black people who might vote for him.

Biff November 6, 2012 at 10:37 pm

Man of Steele, and that cross-eyed guy that worked for cheney?

viennawoods13 November 6, 2012 at 10:40 pm

Allen West also, too.

bobbert November 6, 2012 at 10:41 pm

Is that unprecedentedly high, or unprecedentedly low?

comrad_darkness November 6, 2012 at 10:41 pm

Baptists who didn't want to vote for a Muslim?

I got nothin'

trampndirtdown November 6, 2012 at 10:34 pm

Peggers thinks the magic dolphins might save this thing.

BadKitty904 November 6, 2012 at 10:39 pm

She's still up?

glasspusher November 6, 2012 at 10:41 pm

She's high alright, but not on false drugs!

Oblios_Cap November 6, 2012 at 10:35 pm

Peggy Noonan? Really?

Barbara_ November 6, 2012 at 10:37 pm

One more face lift and that bitch is going to have a goatee.
Honey, which strand of pearls will you be wearing tonight? All of them.

bobbert November 6, 2012 at 10:40 pm

Probably a hologram.

VodkaGoGo November 6, 2012 at 10:35 pm

Rahm Emanual is on and he is smiling because he has a giant rubbery boner right now.

rocktonsam November 6, 2012 at 10:39 pm

RAHMZ makes Richie look like a piker

Terry November 6, 2012 at 10:35 pm

John King says you have to look where the people are when considering voting patterns. Really?

Cable is back.

bobbert November 6, 2012 at 10:39 pm

Pundit derp derp derp.

No real drama, so derp derp derp.

Dr_Zoidberg November 6, 2012 at 10:40 pm

It's that kind of frontier gibberish that made this country great.

Biff November 6, 2012 at 10:36 pm

Peggington of Nooninghamshire has resisted the urge to faint over the $6billion wasted on this election with no gains, declares Florida to be "as tight as a gnat's ass stretched over a snare drum".
Nice turn of phrase, there.

redarmyzombie November 6, 2012 at 10:41 pm

Truly, a woman of high class…

Biff November 6, 2012 at 10:46 pm

Actually, she didn't say that, but I'd like to think she might've.

redarmyzombie November 6, 2012 at 10:49 pm

Eh, whatevs, she's still a shrieking hell-witch.

glasspusher November 6, 2012 at 10:42 pm

kkkkk

HobbesEvilTwin November 6, 2012 at 10:36 pm

Fox News [sic] somehow got Peggy Nooooooonan out of her vicodin haze for an interview.
Remind me why, again, we should care about her opinions*

*w/o mentioning St. Ronnie of Reagan

Chichikovovich November 6, 2012 at 10:52 pm

Because she reminds us of Gloria Swanson in Sunset Boulevard?

emmelemm November 6, 2012 at 10:58 pm

It's the elections that got small!

fuflans November 6, 2012 at 10:37 pm

i'm getting seriously drunk can't we call this shit yet?

BadKitty904 November 6, 2012 at 10:40 pm

If I sit veeeeeeeeeeery still and hold on veeeeeeeeeeeery tight, I won't fall outta this chair.

Toomush_Infer November 6, 2012 at 10:47 pm

I've lost count of the Cuba Libres and can't feel my face, but I think I'm smiling….

NellCote71 November 6, 2012 at 11:02 pm

We are looking pretttty good.

Dr. Nick Riviera November 6, 2012 at 10:37 pm

David Gergen says that the important thing is the popular vote

Veritas78 November 6, 2012 at 10:39 pm

Unless you actually want to be President.

NellCote71 November 6, 2012 at 11:03 pm

And not being David Gergen.

glasspusher November 6, 2012 at 10:42 pm

I sure wish it was in 2000

Dr. Nick Riviera November 6, 2012 at 10:44 pm

Nah, the popular vote is only important when you have candidates ending in vowels and sometimes vowels

AlterNewt November 6, 2012 at 10:43 pm

Thanks, David Gergen. You are a treasure.

viennawoods13 November 6, 2012 at 10:43 pm

Jesus I just checked that. Then I remembered… California.

bobbert November 6, 2012 at 11:34 pm

Yeah. We got quite a few votes to count yet.

AlterNewt November 6, 2012 at 10:38 pm

Ian Pannell, BBC @ Romney HQ: "Pretty somber, I would have to say…"

Oblios_Cap November 6, 2012 at 10:38 pm

BREAKING NEWS – Axelrod ain't shaving anytime soon.

boskolives November 6, 2012 at 10:38 pm

Did Romney offer his lately completely invisible running mate Ryan as a sacrifice? If so, it's not working very well, maybe because people doubt he's actually running this time.

BigSkullF*ckingDog November 6, 2012 at 10:38 pm

Hey guys! What's everyone doing here? Is something important going on?

FakaktaSouth November 6, 2012 at 10:40 pm

Have y'all legalized it yet or what? And if so, remember I loved you before we could get weed legally and crash on your couch.

weejee November 6, 2012 at 10:49 pm

We have 12 minutes before the "polls" close. But we deported them and now use the Post Office, so how that matters I'm not sure, but the counters must keep mum until 8:00.

emmelemm November 6, 2012 at 10:54 pm

I b'leve they said they're making ONE announcement tonight, at 8:15, and then commencing counting ballots received today and shutting until tomorrow, at least.

BigSkullF*ckingDog November 6, 2012 at 10:53 pm

I legalized it a looong time ago. And you don't have to stay on the couch.

Dr_Zoidberg November 6, 2012 at 10:41 pm

Yes, it's the bi-monthly quilting bee. Did you not get the memo?

trampndirtdown November 6, 2012 at 10:41 pm

Just waiting to see if the Four win on marriage equality.

BadKitty904 November 6, 2012 at 10:41 pm

We're playing Hearts!

glasspusher November 6, 2012 at 10:43 pm

It's very strange. It's a Tuesday without a Republican rentboy scandal.

FlipFlopFuck November 6, 2012 at 10:49 pm

We were discussing fucking the krazee….yeah or nay?

IndianaKevin November 6, 2012 at 10:38 pm

Applause! Because Noonan is done!

fuflans November 6, 2012 at 10:48 pm

wait! why!??!!?

bobbert November 6, 2012 at 11:11 pm

You mean, like, she's never going to write or say anything for publication again?

trampndirtdown November 6, 2012 at 10:39 pm

Oh Peggers is going to hate fuck John of Orange tonight!

viennawoods13 November 6, 2012 at 10:39 pm

Whoo Hoo!! Minnesota!

Toomush_Infer November 6, 2012 at 10:48 pm

Minnesota! My home town!….

Chichikovovich November 6, 2012 at 10:54 pm

Viennawoods13 – thank heaven's you're here. I can't find anything about what's happening in Gander-Twillingate or Nickel Belt.

viennawoods13 November 6, 2012 at 11:07 pm

Hopefully in 3 years they'll be kicking those Conservative bums out.

glasspusher November 6, 2012 at 10:39 pm

Someday we'll find it/the rainbow connection/the lovers/the dreamers/ and me…

BadKitty904 November 6, 2012 at 10:42 pm

Dude, it truly isn't easy bein green…

glasspusher November 6, 2012 at 10:45 pm

I am this close to breaking out my acoustic guitar and playing that…

Dr_Zoidberg November 6, 2012 at 10:45 pm

Sounds like communism to me.

glasspusher November 6, 2012 at 10:48 pm

Your point being..?F#m, A, D, E

bobbert November 6, 2012 at 11:12 pm

Dude, those aren't the changes for the Internationale.

BumbleKid November 6, 2012 at 10:40 pm

Charlie Pierce winning the twitter machine:
Please baby Jeebus, you know I'm your amigo. Let Romney end up with 47 percent of the vote. #election2012

Mumbletypeg November 6, 2012 at 10:40 pm

I don't think y'all are nearly drunk enough yet.

FlipFlopFuck November 6, 2012 at 10:50 pm

It's too close to last call.

Chet Kincaid_ November 6, 2012 at 10:53 pm

I just spanked Dr. Zoidberg. It's time to cut me off!

Mumbletypeg November 6, 2012 at 11:09 pm

Zoidberg has been cracking me up tonight.. so I hope you mean in the nicest sense of the word~

Chet Kincaid_ November 6, 2012 at 11:23 pm

I refer to the Assless Chaps Incident.

bobbert November 6, 2012 at 10:53 pm

Working on it. We gotta pace ourselves a little on the Left Coast.

Mumbletypeg November 6, 2012 at 11:10 pm

I upfisted your Arrogant Bastard comment. It's popular around these parts in Virginia, too.

bobbert November 6, 2012 at 11:23 pm

Stone, in San Diego, makes quite a few good brews. AB reminds me of my favorite English bitter, Director's Club.

Come here a minute November 6, 2012 at 10:40 pm

CBS says MACACA DOWN! Yay Tim Kaine!

courtneyesq November 6, 2012 at 10:42 pm

Does anyone know how Jill Stein did tonight? My husband (who insists on calling himself a fiscal conservative, but is, in fact, a socialist) wants to know, as he voted for her….

Biff November 6, 2012 at 10:42 pm

FOCKS NEWS ALERT: COLORADO TOO CLOSE TO CALL!!!!!!11!

Blueb4sinrise November 6, 2012 at 10:42 pm

Congress
Ron Barber [nee Giffords] ahead of Martha McSally [fighter pilot] 52-47,
still very early in count.

BloviateMe November 6, 2012 at 10:42 pm

God damn it Floria/Ohio.

I think it's time for the ol' Billy Baroo…oh billly billy billy…..

IndianaKevin November 6, 2012 at 10:42 pm

Robert Gibbs: When Repub. approval rating is lower than national drinking age, that's bad. No wonder he's a consultant!

Barbara_ November 6, 2012 at 10:43 pm

Awesome tweet:
Patton Oswalt ‏@pattonoswalt
FOX News should play Karl Rove on with adorable oboe music & have a cartoon cupcake say, "What a smart little potato!" when he's done.

snowpointsecret November 6, 2012 at 10:43 pm

Wait we moved over here? Let me say it here too.

Some man in a commercial comparing the Democrats to Socialist Hungary.

… What?

Limeylizzie November 6, 2012 at 10:44 pm

That Peterffer guy, isn't that nutty?

BadKitty904 November 6, 2012 at 10:45 pm

They both put too much water in the goulash? What?

Come here a minute November 6, 2012 at 10:47 pm

Some consultant had to run those ads to get a commission!

IceCreamEmpress November 6, 2012 at 11:07 pm

Ha ha stupid rich dude you wasted your fucking money.

Badonkadonkette November 6, 2012 at 10:43 pm

Chris Jansing reporting from a subdued, even dejected, Romney campaign HQ…she looks so pleased.

Toomush_Infer November 6, 2012 at 10:48 pm

Oh, yeeeaahhhh – that is priceless….

Lazy Media November 6, 2012 at 10:43 pm

Jaysus Fookin Cheerist. I am drunk to the point of New Orleans Mardi Grasness.

Yet. Mittens has yet to defy a single Nate Silver prediction yet. Slang!

Veritas78 November 6, 2012 at 10:43 pm

FL, Bronco up by 56k with 90% reporting.

imissopus November 6, 2012 at 10:45 pm

And now, Dick Morris at 7:44 here on the West Coast:

"dont give up!"

Chichikovovich November 6, 2012 at 10:57 pm

That would be the Dick Morris who predicted a Romney landslide and said there would be a massive day of reckoning for all the pundits who royally screwed the pooch, right? That Dick Morris?

imissopus November 6, 2012 at 10:59 pm

Yeah, that's the one. His Twitter has been getting steadily more desperate and way less optimistic over the last two hours. It's been fun to watch.

bobbert November 6, 2012 at 11:20 pm

Yeah. The one who will, nevertheless, still make more money punditing in a year than the median US citizen will make in his/her lifetime.

Dr. Nick Riviera November 6, 2012 at 10:57 pm

Quick! Let's conquer another country and make it a state!

Blueb4sinrise November 6, 2012 at 10:45 pm

Sheriff Arpaio declares state of emergency in Maricopa County. No election results for his office will be counted.

Veritas78 November 6, 2012 at 10:45 pm

Nate Silver sez: "Early bellwethers in Colorado bode well for Barack Obama."

Simple J Malarkey November 6, 2012 at 10:53 pm

If Obama wins Colorado and Iowa, seems he could lose Florida, Ohio, North Carolina and Virginia, and win the election. Of course, the Romney campaign is counting the votes in Colorado, so Ohio and/or Florida would be good to win. Too many damn states close enough to steal.

bobbert November 6, 2012 at 11:18 pm

Yeah but he's a wee effeminate,
……
balls-on statistics nerd. (And I always use nerd as a compliment).

Limeylizzie November 6, 2012 at 10:46 pm

Todd Akin is speaking, my ovaries are smiling.

Steverino247 November 6, 2012 at 11:01 pm

Can you sing from your diaphragm?

sewollef November 6, 2012 at 11:25 pm

Your ovaries are sweet…

VeraSevera November 6, 2012 at 10:46 pm

Bend over Paul Ryan. You know you like it.

Lucidamente1 November 6, 2012 at 10:46 pm

Minnesota goes for Bamz. You know what Crazy Eyes will say?

Dr_Zoidberg November 6, 2012 at 10:49 pm

I'm thinkin'…a bunch of gibberish and then some Muslim blaming.

bobbert November 6, 2012 at 10:57 pm

And un-American, and John Wayne and blarglusl;dfhlksajldkcmkm. <thud>

Sharkey November 6, 2012 at 10:46 pm

Orgasm?

Orgasm.

Biff November 6, 2012 at 10:53 pm

O gasm.

BoroPrimorac November 6, 2012 at 10:46 pm

Akin's got an epic comb over.

kingofmeh November 6, 2012 at 10:46 pm

most thoroughly counted state thus far: north carolina. with 95% of precincts reporting, election is running 50/49 R/O.

nate silver's prediction for NC – 50/49 R/O.

score one for the nerds.

sbj1964 November 6, 2012 at 10:46 pm

Mittens is already writing his concession speech.

Limeylizzie November 6, 2012 at 10:46 pm

Very ungracious concession speech by Todd Akin.

BadKitty904 November 6, 2012 at 10:48 pm

"FUCK you, ya bastids!"

Oblios_Cap November 6, 2012 at 10:48 pm

Well, an asshole is an asshole no matter what the situation.

FlipFlopFuck November 6, 2012 at 10:52 pm

The diseased weasel can go back to protesting outside abortion clinics….and spending more time with his family.

Chichikovovich November 6, 2012 at 10:58 pm

Good! I wish he had started shouting out verses from Leviticus and Revelation.

bobbert November 6, 2012 at 10:58 pm

Gosh, that's surprising, isn't it. Such a gentleman and all.

BoroPrimorac November 6, 2012 at 11:05 pm

That was some Children of the Corn stuff. Fucking spooky.

Claire beat him by nine points.

stew1 November 6, 2012 at 10:47 pm

George Will wuz wrong–Obama took Minnesota to the suprise of no one but George Will.

stew1 November 6, 2012 at 10:49 pm

In the words of George Will's ex-wife: "take it somewhere else, buster!"

VodkaGoGo November 6, 2012 at 10:47 pm

Im finding this all very hard to fap to. C'mon Florida, show us your votes!

BadKitty904 November 6, 2012 at 10:48 pm

Florida – The Coy State

Chichikovovich November 6, 2012 at 10:59 pm

The state is being a bit flaccid right now.

bobbert November 6, 2012 at 11:09 pm

Give me Ohio and Colorado, and FL is just an interesting close call.

AlterNewt November 6, 2012 at 10:47 pm

Debbie Wasserman Shultz is 'excited'. And 'confident'.

bobbert November 6, 2012 at 11:12 pm

And 'hot'.

Oh, sorry.

snowpointsecret November 6, 2012 at 10:47 pm

53-46 Obama in Hamilton County, Ohio. That's a huge deal.

emmelemm November 6, 2012 at 10:50 pm

But is it a Big Fucking Deal?

gullywompr November 6, 2012 at 10:47 pm

Hey Akin, you FAILED to build that!

gullywompr November 6, 2012 at 10:48 pm

This is not a concession speech at all… Legitimate sour grapes.

bobbert November 6, 2012 at 10:59 pm

"I'm sorry that you assholes think I have to concede, just because I lost".

Chet Kincaid_ November 6, 2012 at 10:48 pm

Hafez al-Assad of Missouri is concessioning. Why are we listening to your stump bullshit, you fucking loser?!

prommie November 6, 2012 at 10:52 pm

Just to let you know, Chet, I love you.

Slim_Pickins November 6, 2012 at 10:48 pm

Is it too soon to congratulate Joe Walsh on his imminent retirement? The only question now is whether he will move from his Congressional office suite to a homeless shelter.

LePiston November 6, 2012 at 10:48 pm

Todd Akin is giving his concession speech, and I am yelling at him to eat shit.

trampndirtdown November 6, 2012 at 10:49 pm

Yell Louder!

Blueb4sinrise November 6, 2012 at 10:51 pm

A great cry was heard throughout the land. If we all yell, he'll hear it.

LePiston November 6, 2012 at 10:54 pm

That fucker is tone deaf. I am waiting for Mittens to give his concession speech. I might throw my wine at the tv. TMI but I got my lady flu today and I think I am scaring my husband.

Blueb4sinrise November 6, 2012 at 11:03 pm

Don't worry, no-one reads these threads.

trampndirtdown November 6, 2012 at 11:06 pm

Negropolis Libel!

sbj1964 November 6, 2012 at 10:49 pm

Come on Florida! president 16,000 votes ahead.

Jerri November 6, 2012 at 10:49 pm

Haha Akin. Go start a church already, ya goon.

Biff November 6, 2012 at 10:49 pm

His concession speech really sucked.

fuflans November 6, 2012 at 10:49 pm

i am only staying up to see egg at the concession speech.

(and be drunk with all you people, obv.)

Limeylizzie November 6, 2012 at 10:52 pm

I just made a freakishly large and strong cup of coffee and am guzzling it just so I can scream at Egg and Mitt.

starfanglednut November 6, 2012 at 11:06 pm

Go Lizzie!

natl_[redacted]_cmdr November 6, 2012 at 10:54 pm

we're here! drunk also.

OzoneTom November 6, 2012 at 10:58 pm

Are Those People allowed medicinal brandy for such occasions?

bobbert November 6, 2012 at 11:29 pm

Somebody be sure to get a youtube of the concession speech. It will be small recompense for the shitstorm of lies we've had to endure, but recompense still.

Veritas78 November 6, 2012 at 10:49 pm

Dang. I missed Scott Brown's concession speech. Oh, well…

BadKitty904 November 6, 2012 at 10:50 pm

I'm sure it'll be online, for your eventual delectation…

102415 November 6, 2012 at 11:29 pm

It was stupid and he was smiling like an idiot.

sbj1964 November 6, 2012 at 10:50 pm

I bet Mittens go's all Al Gore for a recount.

Jukesgrrl November 6, 2012 at 11:18 pm

If they give Ohio AND Florida to Obama, you can bet he'll demand a recount.

tessiee November 6, 2012 at 11:38 pm

PRESIDENT Obama won Ohio and Florida!
Fuck you, MItt!
Fuck you, Koch Bros.!

gullywompr November 6, 2012 at 10:50 pm
102415 November 6, 2012 at 11:31 pm

I just stole that . Thanks.

SayItWithWookies November 6, 2012 at 10:50 pm

Allen's conceding right now! Virginia remains free!

weejee November 6, 2012 at 10:51 pm

Sweet that. Very sweet!

Come here a minute November 6, 2012 at 10:52 pm

Thanks for the heads up — watching the loser now! This is the first time I intentionally watched him!

Dr. Nick Riviera November 6, 2012 at 10:52 pm

Did CNN report this and I missed it?

Steverino247 November 6, 2012 at 11:04 pm

Sic Semper Macaca!

Oblios_Cap November 6, 2012 at 10:50 pm

Karl Rove – still a penis with ears.

DixvilleCrotch November 6, 2012 at 10:50 pm

Akin is looking animatronic and/or waxen. Bless his heart.

Dr. Nick Riviera November 6, 2012 at 10:51 pm

16000 vote difference in Florida…

mille derps November 6, 2012 at 10:52 pm

Mittsouri. Bah!

natl_[redacted]_cmdr November 6, 2012 at 11:04 pm

How could someone vote for Romney and McCaskill?

bobbert November 6, 2012 at 11:33 pm

Against Obama, against Akin. Possible, I guess.

BloviateMe November 6, 2012 at 10:52 pm

Akin needs to ease up on the rouge.Them's some rosy cheeks.

mille derps November 6, 2012 at 10:54 pm

Crikey- he's not wearing pants neither?

BadKitty904 November 6, 2012 at 10:54 pm

Pre-stroke, almost, even…

slowhansolo November 6, 2012 at 10:53 pm

I better not find the motherfucker who stole my pants!!

*belch

tessiee November 6, 2012 at 11:40 pm

Tee hee!
[runs away with slowhansolo's pants]

slowhansolo November 6, 2012 at 11:53 pm

Oh, it's OK. Guess the night turned out to be pants-optional anyway,

neiltheblaze November 6, 2012 at 10:53 pm

Senator Warren. Has a charming ring to it, don't you think?

mille derps November 6, 2012 at 10:56 pm

Charming and delightful.

Yellerdawg November 6, 2012 at 11:07 pm

Vice President sounds better. Clinton/Warren 2016!

stew1 November 6, 2012 at 10:53 pm

Dick Morris should stick to sucking prostitute toes–his prognistication skills (Romney landslide!!!) are lacking.

Lucidamente1 November 6, 2012 at 10:54 pm

Peggington Noonington just tweeted:

"I suspect both Romney and Obama have a sense of what's coming, and it's part of why Romney looks so peaceful and Obama so roiled."

Discuss.

BadKitty904 November 6, 2012 at 10:55 pm

She's high?

Butch_Wagstaff November 6, 2012 at 11:01 pm

Probably a quarter way through her case of wine.

Dr. Nick Riviera November 6, 2012 at 10:55 pm

WTF?

mille derps November 6, 2012 at 10:55 pm

Romney finally gets that long vacation. Obama gets 4 more years.

imissopus November 6, 2012 at 10:55 pm

That was from her column last Friday.

Lucidamente1 November 6, 2012 at 10:59 pm

Retweeting her own stuff: think of it as pundit drunk dialing.

Blueb4sinrise November 6, 2012 at 10:56 pm

Hitler looked peaceful at the end too.

redarmyzombie November 6, 2012 at 10:56 pm

Hellwitch says what?

weejee November 6, 2012 at 10:58 pm

In the Confessional the priest directed Peggers to say 5 Our Fathers, 5 Hail Marys and drink 5 quarts of gin.

trampndirtdown November 6, 2012 at 10:58 pm

One shouldn't drink gin on an empty stomach.

comrad_darkness November 6, 2012 at 11:00 pm

Oh dear. I have to agree with her on this. No one should want this job.

tessiee November 6, 2012 at 11:41 pm

Wishful thinking?

sbj1964 November 6, 2012 at 10:54 pm

GOP senate races shut down like a head shop next door to a church.

kingofmeh November 6, 2012 at 10:54 pm

more "nate silver was right" evidence: delaware counted to 99% of precincts.

outcome: O/R 59/40
silver prediction: 60/40

Blueb4sinrise November 6, 2012 at 10:54 pm

Flake [Flake] leads Carmona {Surgeon General] for Kyl's [major fucking asshole] Senate Toilet.
51- 44

mille derps November 6, 2012 at 10:58 pm

That is bad news, but how many precincts had reported?

Blueb4sinrise November 6, 2012 at 10:59 pm

less than half……….

trampndirtdown November 6, 2012 at 11:03 pm

Let's hope the urban vote swings this thing.

bobbert November 6, 2012 at 11:34 pm

Ah, that's disappointing.

Slim_Pickins November 6, 2012 at 10:55 pm

Carl Rove, "just wait until the next election!"

docterry6973 November 6, 2012 at 11:15 pm

I wonder how much Ol' Turdblossom pocketed out of all those hundreds of millions of dollars that passed through his hands.

tessiee November 6, 2012 at 11:44 pm

I'm estimating, but I think a titload.

Jerri November 6, 2012 at 10:55 pm

Lioness of the senate on msnbc now.

gullywompr November 6, 2012 at 10:55 pm

Liz! Liz Liz! Liz!

snowpointsecret November 6, 2012 at 10:55 pm

Romney's VA lead only 25,000 now. Meanwhile, NC seeming to be getting too far out of reach for Obama to win there but not that big of a deal.

smellyal8tr November 6, 2012 at 10:55 pm

Repub friends are txting that FL is to be called for Obama just after 11 ET (even with people in line, I guess). Axelrod could barely contain his smile while on with MSNBC

NellCote71 November 6, 2012 at 10:55 pm

I have such a girl crush on Elizabeth Warren.

Barbara_ November 6, 2012 at 10:56 pm

Tim Kaine wins control in Virginia! GOP losing control in Vagina.

Butch_Wagstaff November 6, 2012 at 11:00 pm

I'm hoping that damned fool Allen never holds public office ever again.

BaldarTFlagass November 6, 2012 at 10:57 pm

It would be real cool if Elizabeth Warren would hold up three fingers behind her head, do the Tomahawk Chop, and sing the Atlanta Braves war chant during her victory speech.

BadKitty904 November 6, 2012 at 10:58 pm

"EAT it, paleface!"

redarmyzombie November 6, 2012 at 11:04 pm

"Stupid fucking white man!"

AlterNewt November 6, 2012 at 11:05 pm

Totally inappropriate. Hope she does it.

BoroPrimorac November 6, 2012 at 11:11 pm

How do you like them apples, you fancy, male model cunt?

Blendergoathead November 6, 2012 at 10:57 pm

Yay Elizabeth!

Limeylizzie November 6, 2012 at 10:58 pm

Umm, this from Jodi Kantor on Twitter- When Romney lost to Kennedy he lay on the floor with a white lily and said "welcome to my funeral." What will he do tonight if he loses?

BadKitty904 November 6, 2012 at 11:01 pm

Hold his breath 'til he turns blue, ideally…

BoroPrimorac November 6, 2012 at 11:12 pm

Have a soda pop?

tessiee November 6, 2012 at 11:44 pm

Lay on the floor with a white Egg?

AlterNewt November 6, 2012 at 10:58 pm

Idiot Republican strategist patiently explains to BBC host:

"You see, we, here in America, have what has traditionally been called the Gender Gap."

Limeylizzie November 6, 2012 at 10:59 pm

I heard they called NC for Mittens, anyone else hear that?

Dr. Nick Riviera November 6, 2012 at 10:59 pm

John King pretty much did on CNN but nothing official

gullywompr November 6, 2012 at 11:01 pm

Yep.

doloras November 6, 2012 at 11:02 pm

Nate Silver already did that weeks ago.

Dr. Nick Riviera November 6, 2012 at 11:03 pm

OK CNN just called it for Romney

trampndirtdown November 6, 2012 at 11:04 pm

Faux did

GlowneyHouse November 6, 2012 at 11:04 pm

Not a huge surprise. Closer than I thought it would be.

BoroPrimorac November 6, 2012 at 11:07 pm

Yup.

Barbara_ November 6, 2012 at 11:01 pm

President Obama wins Hawaii. I wonder if he's ever been there before?

emmelemm November 6, 2012 at 11:03 pm

What? Isn't it still like 4:00 in Hawaii?

Limeylizzie November 6, 2012 at 11:03 pm

Sure as shit he weren't born there.

Barbara_ November 6, 2012 at 11:07 pm

LimeyLizzie, you delight me so.

Limeylizzie November 6, 2012 at 11:10 pm

I live for your kind words, sister mine.

starfanglednut November 6, 2012 at 11:09 pm

Ha. bet he won Kenya too. Derp, derp.

docterry6973 November 6, 2012 at 11:17 pm

I think one of his fathers lived there for a time. Hard to keep it straight.

prommie November 6, 2012 at 11:01 pm

I can't keep up. I ain't drunk enough to howl at the moon about this, I ain't sober enough to make sense. I love you fakakta!

Barbara_ November 6, 2012 at 11:07 pm

I am voting for Prommie and Fakakta!

FakaktaSouth November 6, 2012 at 11:11 pm

I love you! Even if you told Chet you loved him first. But, of course, I love him too, so I understand. I wish you were with me, this would be funner.

prommie November 6, 2012 at 11:12 pm

Well this is the last election we won't be together, thats good at least!

Barbara_ November 6, 2012 at 11:01 pm

Denver Post calls Colorado for Obama.

Limeylizzie November 6, 2012 at 11:03 pm

Really???

Barbara_ November 6, 2012 at 11:06 pm

Check my Tweets, Sis.

bobbert November 6, 2012 at 11:29 pm

There is, pretty much, your dagger.

BloviateMe November 6, 2012 at 11:02 pm

WTF? Too close to call in Oregon? God damn it…I'm drunk, so I'm gonna need a ride to go chew some ass.

Limeylizzie November 6, 2012 at 11:03 pm

No, baby, too early to call but Barry is in the lead.

BloviateMe November 6, 2012 at 11:08 pm

Still, hurts my feelings…they called Cally, Wash and Hawaii right away.

It'll still go O, but damn it…………….

bobbert November 6, 2012 at 11:25 pm

As a Californian, I share your surprise. I think they called Cali before the polls closed.

BadKitty904 November 6, 2012 at 11:02 pm

CNN projects all 55 California electoral votes going to Bamz?

bobbert November 6, 2012 at 11:35 pm

Bold motherfuckers, ain't they?

sewollef November 6, 2012 at 11:38 pm

Yes.

natl_[redacted]_cmdr November 6, 2012 at 11:02 pm

Not to harsh anyone's buzz, but I haven't seen any local peeps calling Wisc for Tammy Baldwin. Anyone see anybody besides focks news calling it?

vulpes82 November 6, 2012 at 11:05 pm

ABC and CNN.

fuflans November 6, 2012 at 11:03 pm

so deadbeat joe, macaca, naked scott and the rape boys demetrius and chiron (and i cannot BELIEVE i haven't made that connection before as i spent 2 years in that play) LOST.

rock on america.

Veritas78 November 6, 2012 at 11:03 pm

So who's gonna vote for Tim Kaine and NOT vote for Obama?

gullywompr November 6, 2012 at 11:04 pm

Exactly.

snowpointsecret November 6, 2012 at 11:03 pm

CNN: North Carolina for Romney.

Chet Kincaid_ November 6, 2012 at 11:03 pm

California! Swimming Pools! Movie Stars! 55 Electoral Votes!!

AlterNewt November 6, 2012 at 11:03 pm

You're welcome.

Barbara_ November 6, 2012 at 11:09 pm

Chet, I am waiting to hear the story about a man named Jeb. Let's go Florida!

trampndirtdown November 6, 2012 at 11:10 pm

Cali makes Megyn sooooo sad.

bobbert November 6, 2012 at 11:21 pm

That's us. Also, rednecks, but only about 35%.

MilwaukeeKent November 6, 2012 at 11:23 pm

270 is where I want to be, integrity I want to see…

sbj1964 November 6, 2012 at 11:04 pm

Even the supreme court can't save Mittens tonight!

DustyBowlBlues November 6, 2012 at 11:04 pm

Okay. I'm doing the Daily Show coverage now.

viennawoods13 November 6, 2012 at 11:14 pm

I have to wait an hour. Worth it though.

HouseOfTheBlueLights November 6, 2012 at 11:05 pm

We have devolved into discussing magic underwear at the House of the Blue Lights.

Yellerdawg November 6, 2012 at 11:18 pm

I have magic underwear. I put it on, go out, and when I come home, it's gone!

bobbert November 6, 2012 at 11:31 pm

I'm just going to refrain from trying to parse that sentence.

slowhansolo November 6, 2012 at 11:05 pm

David Gregory is a fucking dimwit. That is all.

Dr. Nick Riviera November 6, 2012 at 11:05 pm

Yeah, but why now?

bobbert November 6, 2012 at 11:31 pm

Well, really, one could make that observation at any time, so why not now?

tessiee November 6, 2012 at 11:49 pm

He looks like a monkey, and he smells like one too.

Misty Malarky November 6, 2012 at 11:06 pm

Good news for Georgia Democratic Congressman John Barrow, who was redistricted out of his very Democratic district in Savannah to some place where they play golf a lot.
http://savannahnow.com/latest-news/2012-11-06/rep

ChillBill November 6, 2012 at 11:06 pm

You never know. Mitt could still win California, right?

redarmyzombie November 6, 2012 at 11:10 pm

Only retroactively.

deanbooth November 6, 2012 at 11:06 pm

I just emailed Brian Williams to kiss my ass.

Dr. Nick Riviera November 6, 2012 at 11:07 pm

Why?? I mean, I can imagine why, but why specifically

Limeylizzie November 6, 2012 at 11:08 pm

What did he do?

deanbooth November 6, 2012 at 11:14 pm

Nothing. I was just so nervous that I spontaneously emailed him.

tessiee November 6, 2012 at 11:50 pm

Perhaps not the best choice; his nose is on sideways, which may cause it to get stuck between your bue-tocks.

BadKitty904 November 6, 2012 at 11:06 pm

George Takei just Tweeted: Apple Maps Projects Obama Wins Chile

bobbert November 6, 2012 at 11:29 pm

Oh, my!

Not_Mother November 6, 2012 at 11:06 pm

I wanna see that motherfucker Huckleberry on fox shaking his finger at the camera all yelling "You're going to hell, heathens, I TOLD YOU!!!" Also, not a word about the crime of the century, Benghazi-gate. I do declare.

IceCreamEmpress November 6, 2012 at 11:14 pm

Todd "Legitimate Rape" Akin went full Benghazi in his concession speech. Sore loser much?

Jeffer November 6, 2012 at 11:07 pm

Interesting Tweet:
RT @rauldemolina: ABC News sources say that Jeb Bush told The Romney campaign that they lost Florida.

Limeylizzie November 6, 2012 at 11:07 pm

Claire McCaskill speaks, looking really pretty as well, she has dropped some pounds.

bobbert November 6, 2012 at 11:27 pm

Sadly, she is still probably a Blue Doggie; but, approximately infinitely better than Akin.

VeraSevera November 6, 2012 at 11:07 pm

Brian Williams is fat. He tries to hide it, but I'm not fooled.

tessiee November 6, 2012 at 11:56 pm

He did write a lot of great songs, though, back in the day.

fuflans November 6, 2012 at 11:08 pm

denver post is calling CO for bamz and i think…

we won.

Limeylizzie November 6, 2012 at 11:12 pm

I think we may have won, yes?

BoroPrimorac November 6, 2012 at 11:08 pm

McCaskill's daughters are smoking hot.

ChillBill November 6, 2012 at 11:09 pm

Note to Macaca: this time, please go away for good.

IndianaKevin November 6, 2012 at 11:09 pm

Faux News: Obama has been pandering to his base the the last four years. That's all he's been doing.

sbj1964 November 6, 2012 at 11:10 pm

Let's hope we never have to hear about Mittens again until the neighbors start to complain about the smell next door.

Dr. Nick Riviera November 6, 2012 at 11:10 pm

Iowa called for Obama on CNN

ProgressiveInga November 6, 2012 at 11:10 pm

Bammerz wins Iowa. He and Handsome Joe Biden can get married there, too.

Negropolis November 6, 2012 at 11:10 pm

Got Iowa! The door is closing, Willard…

Biff November 6, 2012 at 11:10 pm

Bronco Bama wins Iowa, didn't even have to suck a corn dog!

Terry November 6, 2012 at 11:10 pm

We,'re getting close to 270

fuflans November 6, 2012 at 11:12 pm

telling you the economist says the denver post has called for bamz.

i think that will do it.

Not_Mother November 6, 2012 at 11:13 pm

California has 55 in the pocket. We're there.

VeraSevera November 6, 2012 at 11:11 pm

Tammy Baldwin. It means a lot. How much longer until even Wonkette finally has a proper dyke on staff?

snowpointsecret November 6, 2012 at 11:11 pm

CNN: Obama wins Iowa. If Obama gets Nevada+Colorado now, he wins.

Limeylizzie November 6, 2012 at 11:11 pm

This?
ABC News sources say that Jeb Bush told The Romney campaign that they lost Florida

Chet Kincaid_ November 6, 2012 at 11:12 pm

Any news on Allen West?

ChillBill November 6, 2012 at 11:14 pm

It looks like the fucker is narrowly escaping with a 1800 vote lead(.5 points) and 8% of votes to go.

Chet Kincaid_ November 6, 2012 at 11:15 pm

Fuck!!

valthemus November 6, 2012 at 11:27 pm

Michelle Bachmann, Steve King and Allen West… The Holy Trinity of Batshit Nuttyness, each an unstoppable font on wackadoo. Let us pray prey…

Limeylizzie November 6, 2012 at 11:12 pm

Oregon for BARRY!

tessiee November 6, 2012 at 11:55 pm

Was there any doubt?
BTW, your comment was posted about 10 minutes after the voting closed here.

Limeylizzie November 6, 2012 at 11:58 pm

Yay Oregonians, btw Fox News is in meltdown and hilarious.

Limeylizzie November 6, 2012 at 11:13 pm

He won!!!! It's over.

Chet Kincaid_ November 6, 2012 at 11:13 pm

MSNBC JUST CALLED IT FOR OBAMA!!!!!!!!!

starfanglednut November 6, 2012 at 11:13 pm

OHIO!!!!! OHIO!!!!! OHIO!!!!!!

Biff November 6, 2012 at 11:13 pm

OH FUCKING HIGH OH!!!1!9!11!!

sewollef November 7, 2012 at 12:04 am

If it ain't brokaw, don't fix it.

sbj1964 November 6, 2012 at 11:13 pm

Fla,Va,and Ohio left should be in this hour,and it's curtains for Mittens!

BumbleKid November 6, 2012 at 11:13 pm

PRESIDENT BARACK OBAMA LADIES AND GENTLEMAN

Not_Mother November 6, 2012 at 11:14 pm

Reps DEAD IN O-H-I-O

doloras November 6, 2012 at 11:15 pm

I'VE GOT A RHYME THAT COMES IN A RIDDLE, MOTHERFUCKERS!!!

emmelemm November 6, 2012 at 11:16 pm

I actually get that now!

gullywompr November 6, 2012 at 11:14 pm

WITH VOTES!

WITH VOOOOOOOOOOOOOTES!!

DixvilleCrotch November 6, 2012 at 11:14 pm

It's jizzin' time… MSNBC just said Bronco is re-electered!

Terry November 6, 2012 at 11:14 pm

One more state and Barry wins!

clblabin November 6, 2012 at 11:15 pm

That hopey, changey thing's working out just fine, Sarah.

Jukesgrrl November 6, 2012 at 11:15 pm

MSNBC called it for Bamz.

Dr. Nick Riviera November 6, 2012 at 11:15 pm

CNN calls Oregon for Obama

gullywompr November 6, 2012 at 11:15 pm

Megyn Kelly notes Ohio win, and queries: "What does it mean?"

DixvilleCrotch November 6, 2012 at 11:17 pm

Ha that poor thing.

docterry6973 November 6, 2012 at 11:20 pm

To her it doesn't mean much.

ChillBill November 6, 2012 at 11:20 pm

And I screamed: "Game Over, bitch!"

lulzmonger November 6, 2012 at 11:16 pm

NBC: Projected Win For Barack Obama.

KILLSHOT … with votes.

Terry November 6, 2012 at 11:16 pm

Come on Ohio!

Jerri November 6, 2012 at 11:16 pm

Yes!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes yes yes yes yes!!!!!

Can't wait to watch Ann Romney during the concession speech!

Jukesgrrl November 6, 2012 at 11:31 pm

That was my secret wish I sealed in a envelope and hid so as not to jinx it. That Ann breaks down on national TV. I wanna see her suffer.

natl_[redacted]_cmdr November 6, 2012 at 11:16 pm

Ohio! Ohio! I love ya, Ohio! You're always a state [or 2] awaaaaay!

ChillBill November 6, 2012 at 11:16 pm

It's official: thank you, Ohio!

Toomush_Infer November 6, 2012 at 11:16 pm

With NBC calling Ohio, I turned to Fake News to hear Lou Dobbs shaking his head: "These are peculiar times." Fuck you and fuck you, Lou – you and the whole Fake clan can stick your heads in the sand…..while the rest of us breathe a sigh of relief that your lying asses have not prevailed and you cannot fool all the people all the time….

Willardbot9000_V2.5 November 6, 2012 at 11:16 pm

It's over! I know you all saw it too…but fuck you, ROMNEY! Fuck you and your fat head too!

trampndirtdown November 6, 2012 at 11:16 pm

CBS calls Ohio for Obamz!

Jukesgrrl November 6, 2012 at 11:17 pm

Suck on it, Donald Trump!

Steverino247 November 6, 2012 at 11:17 pm

90% counted shows Obama ahead now in VA.

fuflans November 6, 2012 at 11:17 pm

oh my.

we did it you guys.

Jukesgrrl November 6, 2012 at 11:18 pm

Kisses to you from Arizona.

Come here a minute November 6, 2012 at 11:17 pm

WE WIN, again. And the VA Board of Elections just put Barry up by .11%

Negropolis November 6, 2012 at 11:17 pm

I can't believe it. All that superPAC money, all of that hate, and for what? I'm speechless.

Dr. Nick Riviera November 6, 2012 at 11:18 pm

I know! talk about David and Goliath

fuflans November 6, 2012 at 11:20 pm

WE WON DAMMIT

Dr. Nick Riviera November 6, 2012 at 11:21 pm

On CNN they said Republicans outspent by 90 million dollars

emmelemm November 6, 2012 at 11:24 pm

Allll that money. All the children in America could have been fed, the sick healed, infrastructure rebuilt, R & D into cleaner energy… but no. FUCKING WASTED.

(Still, in your face, bitches!)

deanbooth November 6, 2012 at 11:17 pm

* breathes *

C_R_Eature November 6, 2012 at 11:18 pm

I am proud to have mobilized the all important Atlantic Cephalopod vote for Barack Obama.

fuflans November 6, 2012 at 11:21 pm

well, certainly i learned alot about spine from you all.

C_R_Eature November 6, 2012 at 11:46 pm

There's Mettle in our Cuttle.

Dr. Nick Riviera November 6, 2012 at 11:18 pm

CNN Calls it for Obama!

VeraSevera November 6, 2012 at 11:18 pm

Whew. Thank gawd. THAT's over. Now back to PBS, The Monarchy: The Royal Family at Work. Now THAT's TV.

fuflans November 6, 2012 at 11:21 pm

downton abbey, dr who.

trampndirtdown November 6, 2012 at 11:26 pm

Matt Smith is calling for a Dr. Who/ Sherlock crossover!

gullywompr November 6, 2012 at 11:19 pm

I say again:

WITH VOOOOOOOTES!!!!

Terry November 6, 2012 at 11:19 pm

Thank God. Thank God. Thank God.

Negropolis November 6, 2012 at 11:20 pm

I can't find tears. I knew this was coming, but I still can't believe it. Hate has been defeated. They don't have to like him, they don't even have to respect him, but they are stuck with him, now, and a Democratic Senate to boot.

I'm so over their shit. SO over.

Jukesgrrl November 6, 2012 at 11:23 pm

I'm shaking your hand, sir.

trampndirtdown November 6, 2012 at 11:32 pm

It's over for tonight. Tomorrow begins the lame duck, we gotta keep PUSHING!

bobbert November 6, 2012 at 11:45 pm

The Senate was a nice, and not really expected, bonus. I'd like (but don't expect) to see Dirty Harry change the filibuster rule to 55 at the start of the next session.

MilwaukeeKent November 6, 2012 at 11:20 pm

WOOT! WOOT! WOOT! The sweet justice of maybe 2 billion spent by the most reactionary of Hillbillynaires, for naught, If corporations were people, you might have won, Mitt.

AlterNewt November 6, 2012 at 11:20 pm

So, how 'bout those Lakers?

docterry6973 November 6, 2012 at 11:22 pm

You think the Eagles should bench Michael Vick?

GeorgiaBurning November 6, 2012 at 11:20 pm

A big whew. It's cold in Canada

Chichikovovich November 6, 2012 at 11:24 pm

Scientific fact: It's 10 degrees (Celsius) colder in Canada when there is no hockey.

VeraSevera November 6, 2012 at 11:20 pm

omg…cbs is totally bawling over Obama's win…burn in hell cbs

Dr. Nick Riviera November 6, 2012 at 11:21 pm

NATE SILVER CHEATED WITH HIS WIZARD POWERS!

sbj1964 November 6, 2012 at 11:21 pm

The Monkeys on the Conservatard blogs are already at each others throats.

Terry November 6, 2012 at 11:21 pm

Rove, the Koch Bros, the rest of them lied and spent millions and they still couldn't do it.

God bless America, and I mean that sincerely.

102415 November 6, 2012 at 11:48 pm

Agreed. Now this old lady is going out to party.

C_R_Eature November 6, 2012 at 11:22 pm

I'm re-posting this from the last liveblog, because I didn't follow you all. Still true:

I'm cracking open a bottle of year old Blueberry Mead. Happy Election, Everyone.

I knew this already, but Barry really is right; Voting is the best Sweet Revenge.

Hey Mitt: It's all over now, baby blue.

Jesus fuck. I feel like we've all just averted catastrophe. And I'm exhausted.

fuflans November 6, 2012 at 11:26 pm

i am so exhausted this last two weeks… not even sure i can listen to bamz part deux.

Veritas78 November 6, 2012 at 11:22 pm

Suck it, Adelson, Kochs, and all you stupid billionaires. You spent all that money and you lost.

Jukesgrrl November 6, 2012 at 11:29 pm

Maddow reminded them that they won't get it back, either.

Dr. Nick Riviera November 6, 2012 at 11:22 pm

Aaaannd CNN goes to the reaction from KENYA

Veritas78 November 6, 2012 at 11:23 pm

There are a lot of losers tonight. One big winner is Nate Silver.

Pres.Beeblebrox November 6, 2012 at 11:23 pm

Lotsa sad faces over on Fox News…

fuflans November 6, 2012 at 11:29 pm

i can't even watch. i'm just so tired and happy.

tessiee November 7, 2012 at 12:33 am
Dr. Nick Riviera November 6, 2012 at 11:24 pm

Now I don't have to avoid the Hall of Presidents for the next 4 years

natl_[redacted]_cmdr November 6, 2012 at 11:24 pm

*smiles for the first time tonight. also, tears.*

Not_Mother November 6, 2012 at 11:26 pm

Romney tells fox he won't concede ohio. Neither is rove.

Dr. Nick Riviera November 6, 2012 at 11:26 pm

Now! Will Mitt give a concession speech? NPR said he didn't have one written.

FakaktaSouth November 6, 2012 at 11:26 pm

Bring on that crying bitch Ann, I wanna see the sadness of disappointment of the failure she has married. Fuck yeah, what a great night.

GeorgiaBurning November 6, 2012 at 11:26 pm

Now- take the Congress in 2014!

ChessieNefercat November 6, 2012 at 11:26 pm

Mitts won't concede fix hopeful cocksuckers.

Edit Fox not fix

Chichikovovich November 6, 2012 at 11:26 pm

As an immigrant and recent new citizen, I'd just like to say:

WOOOOHOOO!!! FREE STUFF!!!!

AlterNewt November 6, 2012 at 11:28 pm

Git yer Food Stamp card out, Chich. It's party time!

sullivanst November 6, 2012 at 11:27 pm

Oh, so that's why comments had slowed way down in the old livebloog

Jerri November 6, 2012 at 11:28 pm

Obama wins, Tammy Baldwin defeats the boy from Elroy to make history, and Paul Ryan as a national figure got a thumpin. I am a happy Wisconsin Democrat tonight!

Terry November 6, 2012 at 11:31 pm

Tammy is going to be wonderful!

Negropolis November 6, 2012 at 11:29 pm

This is the most unncessarily heavy lift for an incumbent president I've ever seen in my life. It shouldn't have been this difficult. Literally the day of his inaugeration congressional Republicans were in a damn-near literal lair plotting his political demise. My god, foru fucking years of this shit, and he couldn't be moved. Let him roar, goddamnit. Let him roar, and let it be heard from Paine to Hawaii.

Dr. Nick Riviera November 6, 2012 at 11:30 pm

And not just him. Straight up, as soon as he was elected, I was thinking "we have to win reelection or that will be interpreted as a fail of the first AA president"

Negropolis November 6, 2012 at 11:33 pm

Truly, the GOP wanted to make this a referendum on the "other" the "47%". We won. All of us, but especially us "others."

Dr. Nick Riviera November 6, 2012 at 11:35 pm

Even as happy as I was last election, this election was always floating in the back of my mind

102415 November 6, 2012 at 11:53 pm

I just feel so relieved. After 5 days of sitting in the dark and cold first I got the lights back on and now this.

fuflans November 6, 2012 at 11:30 pm

hey! can we not post alien muppets 'bring bring bring'.

in honor of spitzer or something?

sudsmckenzie November 6, 2012 at 11:31 pm

Hey, Everybody, WERE ALL GONNA GET LAID!!1

Jukesgrrl November 6, 2012 at 11:34 pm

Do we have any news from Janesville yet, Suds?

102415 November 6, 2012 at 11:55 pm

That would be so damn sweet I would go into a coma.

sudsmckenzie November 7, 2012 at 12:39 am

no way, they pumped 2 mill in when p90x entered to buy him off. Plus he hunts and seems to non coherent people what a coherent person sounds like.

Jukesgrrl November 7, 2012 at 5:01 am

That sucks.But we've had worse days, no?

sbj1964 November 6, 2012 at 11:31 pm

Obama,The Force is strong with this one.

Terry November 6, 2012 at 11:31 pm

The Romney's must be shocked. Too bad, so sad.

Dr. Nick Riviera November 6, 2012 at 11:32 pm

Rafalca is going to get kicked tonight

Limeylizzie November 6, 2012 at 11:32 pm

What states haven't been called yet, how big a win will it be? I really want to see Mitt and Egg choke down their pride and have to concede and say something nice about Barry.

Jukesgrrl November 6, 2012 at 11:41 pm

I LIVE to see Egg at the concession. We have refused her and she isn't going to like it.

Limeylizzie November 6, 2012 at 11:44 pm

They are NOT conceding Ohio, says Rachel Maddow.

Jukesgrrl November 7, 2012 at 5:04 am

At last, they had to.And Egg was wearing that “I've been crying all night” face, even though she didn't fulfill my wildest dream and breakdown on live TV.

FeloniousMonk November 6, 2012 at 11:33 pm

Mitch McConnell vows "We will make Obama a two-term president".

102415 November 6, 2012 at 11:56 pm

lol.

ChessieNefercat November 6, 2012 at 11:34 pm

Somebody make mittens concede, please. I have to go to work in the morning and have foolishly switched from wine (box empty) to brandy or Cognac or Scotch or something fancy like that. My, my typing is getting better or can drunkenly outthink autogill.

Make him conceeeeeeede….. autoFill

Negropolis November 6, 2012 at 11:34 pm

Kids climbing the trees outside the White House. lol

Jukesgrrl November 6, 2012 at 11:39 pm

Are they the same ones that were there yelling USA the day OBL bit the dust? Somehow I don't think so.

Negropolis November 6, 2012 at 11:41 pm

I'd bet many of them are the same ones. lol

tessiee November 6, 2012 at 11:36 pm

Oh, my God!
It's true!
It's really true!
All I can do is cry and say, "Thank you, God!" over and over.

VeraSevera November 6, 2012 at 11:37 pm

Fox is despondent. Bitter. Uber-bitchy. Despondent. Hardly enough will to live to sharpen their knives and take turns lunging it to old Mittens Agatha Christie style…praying that Obama will be able to save us from the fiscal cliff. Bitter. Let's do a fundraiser to buy them some sharpening stones.

AlterNewt November 6, 2012 at 11:39 pm
Negropolis November 6, 2012 at 11:40 pm

OT: Locally here in Michigan, it looks like the urban area vote is finally coming in with about 40% counted. The emergency manager is going down along with all of the other initiatives, which is unfortunate for the three other liberal initiatives, but the EM law going down would be a HUGE blow to Snyder.

Dems look to be picking up a seat on the state Supreme Court, which would give us control, I believe.

MI-1 in the UP MAYBE might swing back Dem. MI-3 and MI-11 look lost, with MI-3 being closer than it should have been for Republicans.

Stabenow beating Hokstra like a drum.

102415 November 6, 2012 at 11:59 pm

Wow.

Jerri November 6, 2012 at 11:41 pm

Romney isn't conceding Ohio now says msnbc? Come the fuck on.

sbj1964 November 6, 2012 at 11:42 pm

Is a post election erection socially acceptable?

fuflans November 6, 2012 at 11:42 pm

the economist says karl rove is over.

discuss.

sullivanst November 6, 2012 at 11:43 pm

I thought he was over when his "the" math was so totally fucking wrong, so what do I know?

Dr. Nick Riviera November 6, 2012 at 11:43 pm

CNN : Romney not ready to concede

sullivanst November 6, 2012 at 11:44 pm

Loser stretches out loserdom.

GeorgiaBurning November 6, 2012 at 11:59 pm

There will be a recorded statement broadcast, as his plane leaves for Singapore

Not_Mother November 6, 2012 at 11:43 pm

More from the bunker: Rove melting, melting on FoxNews. Seems Mitt won Ohio after all in alternative reality. Baier & Kelly mortified.

Bitter? EAT SHIT AND DIE

Dr. Nick Riviera November 6, 2012 at 11:44 pm

Romney refusing to concede: asshole to the end

ChessieNefercat November 6, 2012 at 11:44 pm

I think a can of Raid would fix Fox right up.

VeraSevera November 6, 2012 at 11:45 pm

Lesson of Ohio (and Midwest): (1) The next chapter of Racism in American just might not be as ugly as the last. (2) Some faint residual class consciousness is still capable of overcoming racism. Mittens and Detroit: Bad. Black guy who saves the auto industry. Not so bad.

Pres.Beeblebrox November 6, 2012 at 11:45 pm

dafuq? no concession? Ohio is our new Florida!

VeraSevera November 6, 2012 at 11:47 pm

Peggy Noonan feels subdued. On Fox. Subdued. Thank you Mr. Prez. For subuding her. Thank you.

Dr. Nick Riviera November 6, 2012 at 11:49 pm

I can't let go until douchebag Romney concedes

VeraSevera November 6, 2012 at 11:49 pm

Fox. Ah. At last. The knives are out. Peggy Noonan. Those pesky, undisclosed tax returns. Ha!

Dr. Nick Riviera November 6, 2012 at 11:53 pm

DIRT DOESNT VOTE JOHN KING. Doesn't matter that the 2 people that live in 10 square miles vote republican and make the map all red

Not_Mother November 6, 2012 at 11:54 pm

Hahahaha@realDonaldTrump: This election is a total sham and a travesty. We are not a democracy! Megyn Kelly suggests having Karl Rove "duke it out" with the decision desk. CNN JOHN King first to say "civil war" coming. Romney still sore loser motherfucker.

Dr. Nick Riviera November 6, 2012 at 11:54 pm

Ohio moved from blue to red on CNN

Pres.Beeblebrox November 6, 2012 at 11:54 pm

KARL ROVE IS SO MAD YOU GUYS!

Seriously, he is on Fux trying to get the network to call back the call of Ohio for O. Conflict of interest, anyone?

FeloniousMonk November 7, 2012 at 12:03 am

Fox is also showing numbers that mean Ohio shouldn't have been called yet, and it's the only news channel they'll put on here. I can't find anything reliable on the net because I'm a dumbshit. Reassure me, please; this is done and dusted?

sullivanst November 7, 2012 at 12:10 am

Rachel just explained, there are 750,000 votes outstanding in counties that Obama's winning 60:40; only 200,000 votes outstanding in Romney counties.

Pres.Beeblebrox November 7, 2012 at 12:24 am

All the networks called it for BHO, but Rove is still SO MAD YOU GUYS.

VeraSevera November 6, 2012 at 11:56 pm

Ok. I just heard the words "electoral rout." Now I can have a cigarette.

VeraSevera November 6, 2012 at 11:58 pm

Fox. New spirit of humility. Can you believe that?

VeraSevera November 7, 2012 at 12:00 am

It's funny. I thoughy, if Mittens win I'm going out and throwing rocks. But now I feel like throwing rocks…anyway. I'm I a bad person?

102415 November 7, 2012 at 12:10 am

No, you just need to throw rocks. Throw some for me.

sullivanst November 7, 2012 at 12:12 am

Call Nevada and Florida already, and make Ohio irrelevant.

Seriously, I've looked at the breakdown of outstanding votes in Florida, and I cannot for the life of me understand why it hasn't been called already.

ttommyunger November 7, 2012 at 10:02 am

Am I the only one besides George Stuffalotofstuff who noticed Dianne Sawyer was shit-faced last night?

bobbert November 6, 2012 at 10:45 pm

But what about Zoidberg?

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