OBAMAROMNEYD√§MMERUNG!  8:02 pm November 6, 2012

Barack Obama’s Huge Election: Your Throbbing Liveblog (Part 1)

by Doktor Zoom

get a brain plurebusGreetings, Wonkers! Welcome to your exciting Election Night Liveblog for Celebration and / or Weeping! We hope you have laid in a supply of the necessary ingredients: snack foods, kleenex, antidepressants, and The Good Stuff, whatever that may be. Should you feel like flexing your mixological muscle, Rebecca suggests you try an El Presidente — it’s topical and Tropical!

Joining us from the Wonkette Chat Cave are Wonkette Special Correspondents Josh Fruhlinger, Rich Abdill, Kaia Mursi, Kris Benson, and HOLY CRAP SARA BENINCASA!!! Also, until she leaves for tonight’s LA Electoral Gala, we have Editrix Rebecca along with us. Kid Zoom is here for the first couple of hours, too! We also will be hoping for tweets / texts from Jesse Taylor, who is being herded onto an election party bus somewhere. We have also taken a solemn No Ponies vow, which we will only break if we feel like it.

8:02 NPR is playing that Election Music Fanfare that we will be sick of before the evening is over, so it is time to start this thing!

8:05 We have like three thousand people in the ChatCave, and maybe two of them have cable. Your Doktor Zoom is not one of them. This will be great! We will be looking here a lot, and here, also too!

8:08 Rich Abdill: “Florida: Obama up 73,000 votes, with around 3.6 million counted. Elections officials are now taking a quick pizza break and THEY HAVE NO NAPKINS”

8:10 Sara B: Wolf Blitzer is working those fierce hipster glasses like a Brooklyn bicycle messenger. And CNN reporters will not stop repeating the phrase “white knuckle”

Josh F: Barry is leading early in florida, which seems good? i’m assuming they won’t get around to counting all the poor people votes until late, because they’re all in line at their like four polling places

8:13 Kris B: this just in: majority of voters hate america

Rich A. CNN says Romney’s acceptance speech is 1,118 words long. His concession speech is only, “Peace, fuckers.”

Sara B. All I want to do is talk about how pretty Erin Burnett is.

8:17 NPR is interviewing Angus King, the apparent senator-elect from Maine, who’s taking Olympia Snowe’s seat. He says he has not yet decided which party he will caucus with, and he has a ludicrous mustache:

8:20 Kaia M. Michelle Obama tweets: “All of our hard work these past 18 months comes down to what happens right now. Let’s not leave anything to chance.” This is her call to obots to begin the race riots.

8:21 Your Doktor Zoom says to Kid Zoom, “Frozen P-I-Z-Z-A goes in the OVEN.” Kid Zoom is not amused.

8:25 Sara B.: Bob Corker wins reelection, maintains status as my favorite Republican name to say out loud. “Bob Corker.” Heh heh.

Josh notes that in Indiana, Richard Mourdock is down 6 points w/24% reporting.

Rich A: Florida’s proposed amendment to remove the separation of church and state is getting OBLITERATED. Good news for Florida, bad news for blog

8:30 Kris B. sez, voting in NJ is broken you guys Also, too, officials on Staten Island are pleading for your underwear. They do not want your shirts or pants.

Sara B.: Wolf Blitzer just called the columns atop the Empire State Building “colored.” Wolf Blitzer is a racist.
kristina b.: it is a building of color, duh.

8:32 Rich A. tells us that Josh Mandel losing in Ohio 36 to 60. Heckuva Job, Sherroddy!

Sara B.: Candy Crowley said “white knuckle” A FUCKING GAIN. dRINK!
Sara B.: Oh my God now she said “white knuckling it here in private.” Candy Crowley loves fisting!
kristina b.: Who at the romney camp DOESN’T have white knuckles, thes are are the whitest people I’ve ever seen!

8:33 Rebecca S.: No Congressman The Plumber :(

8:40 Josh popped in to add that CBS News is reporting that Virginia has stopped reporting results because there are so many people still in line — in line in Obama-areas like Richmond, Newport News, etc. Also, too, wrestling lady loses race in Connecticut (AGAIN!) and whore-cheater Menendez wins in NJ. (Where, we ask, is the justice for stiffed Ladies of Negotiable Affection?)

8:45 Rebecca S: B. Barry Bamz winning Jewishes by 40.
Rebecca S.: BUT HE HATES ISRAEL!
Kaia M.: damn. what was it in 2008?
Sara B.: NEW JERSEY DOESN’T CARE ABOUT DOMINICAN HOOKERS
Rebecca S.: probly the same or something, it was just funny cause the Republicans were CONSTANTLY claiming Jews hate Bamz…But what does Unskewed Polls say?

This has been so exciting, you guys! But the frozen pizza is ready, and Kid Zoom only burned it a little bit (we still love him very much)

We will now hand off livebloggening duties to the lovely and talented Kaia Mursi, who will take over in a few minutes… BUT FIRST! An Important Between-Livebloog Post About Mittens from Josh Fruhlinger!

Announcement! New Livebloog is UP, people!

 

Hola wonkerados.

To improve site performance, we did a thing. It could be up to three minutes before your comment appears. DON'T KEEP RETRYING, OKAY?

Also, if you are a new commenter, your comment may never appear. This is probably because we hate you.

{ 582 comments }

Barbara_ November 6, 2012 at 8:03 pm

Stop sexting me, Nate Silver. I love ya, but now is the time for us to see how brilliant you are.
Let's get our drink-on!
Where's Chet?

YerMa November 6, 2012 at 8:05 pm

Bamz keeps sexting me and now Michelle is emailing me about it. I'm all like "back off, Barry!" She will kick my ass all day long.

Barbara_ November 6, 2012 at 8:06 pm

I want to be you right now. : )

Butch_Wagstaff November 6, 2012 at 9:09 pm

Obama and Tim Kaine have even sent surrogate-stalkers to my house!

Chet Kincaid_ November 6, 2012 at 8:07 pm

Present!

Barbara_ November 6, 2012 at 8:11 pm

Now my heart smiles, good to see you, Chet.

Fare la Volpe November 6, 2012 at 9:13 pm

Barb, please hold me. The computer box is making mean noises and it's scaaaaary.

SorosBot November 6, 2012 at 8:04 pm

Needs more ponies!

SnarkOff November 6, 2012 at 8:09 pm

JERRY: Horses? They're like big riding dogs.

ELAINE: What about ponies? What kind of abnormal animal is that? And those kids who had their own ponies…

JERRY: I know, I hated those kids. In fact, I hate anyone that ever had a pony when they were growing up.

MANYA: (angry) I had a pony.

Boojum November 6, 2012 at 8:28 pm

Barbecue!

DickWharfinger November 6, 2012 at 8:37 pm

Please do not make me wait 5 hours for Craig Ferguson. Secretariet is probably out chasing tail tonite.
Wonkette could easily call the election. Wonkers are not into Mittens and Egg.

BadKitty904 November 6, 2012 at 8:04 pm

At last! Now, SIC 'EM, BAMZ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

MittBorg November 6, 2012 at 8:17 pm

11 EVs ahead, 100K votes behind. As always, my Pres. knows strategy.

sati_demise November 6, 2012 at 8:05 pm

West by god Virginia

SorosBot November 6, 2012 at 8:05 pm

And as the East Coast closes the electoral vote count closes up.

glasspusher November 6, 2012 at 8:09 pm

Tighter than a crab's ass!

MittBorg November 6, 2012 at 8:18 pm

How tight IS a crab's ass, glass? (Ponders)

OzoneTom November 6, 2012 at 8:19 pm

"razor-tight"

glasspusher November 6, 2012 at 8:21 pm

It's the platinum-iridium standard for tightness! Why do you ask?Hope you're well! It's me and the kid screaming at the tee vee right now!

MittBorg November 6, 2012 at 8:27 pm

I've never considered the question before. I'm raving insane from eating too many potato chips and biscottis and drinking too much tea and booze and smoking everything I can lay my hands on. If Bams does NOT win tonight, I expect a myocardial infarct.

Boojum November 6, 2012 at 8:30 pm

Tighter than a cow's ass in fly time. My school bus driver said that, when I was a child. I don't know who he meant.

glasspusher November 6, 2012 at 8:35 pm

When flies come around, cows pucker up, or when a cow is flown? A nation waits and wonders…

MittBorg November 6, 2012 at 8:38 pm

I'm tellin' ya. They got all kinds weird sayings.

Mumbletypeg November 6, 2012 at 8:05 pm

Message to Mitt: "Now botch this drive!"

Terry November 6, 2012 at 8:05 pm

I'm too nervous to drink yet. :o

Barbara_ November 6, 2012 at 8:06 pm

Hang in there, Terry. We will get through this together. So glad you are here.

Terry November 6, 2012 at 8:08 pm

Doing some stress eating instead of drinking, no more jerky in my hurricane kit. Groan…..

glasspusher November 6, 2012 at 8:10 pm

I feel like shit and am sleep deprived from the news trucks waking me up waiting for Jerry Brown this morning, I'm going to have to do this stone cold sober to not feel worse tomorrow morning.

finallyhappy November 6, 2012 at 8:12 pm

Obvious but Maryland and DC called for the Prez! We promise and deliver!!

Terry November 6, 2012 at 8:24 pm

Let's me know I live in the right place. :)

Nothingisamiss November 6, 2012 at 8:51 pm

I feel you. I just started a little drinking, but my stress eating is out of control.

Close_Read November 6, 2012 at 9:38 pm

I'm so there! Potato chips, Pepsi, pepper jack cheese, little chocolate granola thingies, the remains of my Halloween candies – I've got them all laid out in front of me like surgical equipment.

Mumbletypeg November 6, 2012 at 8:07 pm

Pizza arrived. Too anxious to pop the cork on the bubbly though.

Monsieur_Grumpe November 6, 2012 at 8:09 pm

I got a bottle too. Must. Wait.

Nothingisamiss November 6, 2012 at 8:51 pm

God DAMN IT! I forgot to buy champagne!

HRH_Maddie November 6, 2012 at 8:06 pm

Everything is Too Close to Call – I'm losing my "stuff" over here.

BoroPrimorac November 6, 2012 at 8:22 pm

It's only 8:30 EST

emmelemm November 6, 2012 at 8:06 pm

ZOOM IS IN THE HOUSE!

SorosBot November 6, 2012 at 8:06 pm

Also remember; Jersey has polls open until Friday because of Sandy, but that's another gimme 14 electoral votes for Obama that won't be on the count tonight.

sati_demise November 6, 2012 at 8:06 pm

Maryland french kissing Barry

Limeylizzie November 6, 2012 at 8:06 pm

Just saw on Twitter that ALan Grayson is winning!

TheGyrus November 6, 2012 at 8:09 pm

I loved his poem, "Howl"

mille derps November 6, 2012 at 8:13 pm

Yay! The US House NEEDS Alan Grayson!

BoroPrimorac November 6, 2012 at 8:23 pm

His district was redrawn and it suits him a lot more. I'm looking forward to Grayson v West if that eraser headed bastard wins his race.

Limeylizzie November 6, 2012 at 8:26 pm

West was losing.

viennawoods13 November 6, 2012 at 8:27 pm

Best. News. Evah!

Limeylizzie November 6, 2012 at 8:30 pm

I am eager for that moron Joe Walsh to go down.

SorosBot November 6, 2012 at 8:33 pm

If only Bachmann can join him.

Limeylizzie November 6, 2012 at 8:39 pm

Cantor won, but West is behind and I suspect Joe Walsh will lose.

Nothingisamiss November 6, 2012 at 9:03 pm

I had totally forgotten that he was in a race this cycle. Yay, Alan!!

SaraJBenincasa November 6, 2012 at 8:06 pm

WOOT WOOT! LET'S PARTY YOU FILTHY WHORES!!!

Barbara_ November 6, 2012 at 8:07 pm

Takes one to know one. ; ) Thanks for being here in the sisterhood of the traveling panties.

SaraJBenincasa November 6, 2012 at 8:16 pm

Yesssss!

Chet Kincaid_ November 6, 2012 at 8:09 pm

If I feed your avatar grapes, will you scourge me with a Swiffer?!

SorosBot November 6, 2012 at 8:10 pm

Oh to be abused again…

natl_[redacted]_cmdr November 6, 2012 at 8:10 pm

swoon!

MittBorg November 6, 2012 at 8:28 pm

Oh, Sara! What's come over you? You used to call us vile crawling maggots, and other such imaginative sobriquets.

BadKitty904 November 6, 2012 at 8:37 pm

"Filthy"?!

freakishlywrong November 6, 2012 at 8:06 pm

Boxes of wine. I'm in to win it.

Barbara_ November 6, 2012 at 8:09 pm

Are you having a fine cardbordeaux?

BaldarTFlagass November 6, 2012 at 8:13 pm

Cardboardeaux. I am so fucking stealing that.

Nothingisamiss November 6, 2012 at 9:04 pm

Sooooo stealing this also, too.

tracyhasfun November 6, 2012 at 8:06 pm

http://bit.ly/SSF9fO yay NPR. I already know my vote has been counted. I voted a week and a half ago, and my county has a website where you can check your ballot status. NOW COME ON OHIO.

BaldarTFlagass November 6, 2012 at 8:07 pm

You mean no one is going to watch the Raptors/Thunder game over on NBA TV?

SorosBot November 6, 2012 at 8:07 pm

Isn't anyone watching hockey?

BaldarTFlagass November 6, 2012 at 8:11 pm

Someone needs to tell those guys that they aren't the NFL. Or the NBA.

Chichikovovich November 6, 2012 at 8:19 pm

Very true. For example when the Nfl locks out players the players don't have the option of signing a contract with a Swedish or Russian team.

SorosBot November 6, 2012 at 8:29 pm

Although tthe NBA players do but still caved. At least the NFL refs mostly won.

Barbara_ November 6, 2012 at 8:32 pm

Chich, I REALLY love hockey!

Barbara_ November 6, 2012 at 8:12 pm

Hockey players walk on water, ya know.

SorosBot November 6, 2012 at 8:17 pm

Heh. You're funny.

glasspusher November 6, 2012 at 8:13 pm

Are you watching NBC? I see what you did there…

GeorgiaBurning November 6, 2012 at 8:44 pm

Kitchener leading Mississauga going into 3rd, if you're desperate enough to watch OHL

MittBorg November 6, 2012 at 8:30 pm

JESUS SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP … wut?

Oh, it's you.

(returns to screaming at NYT site on computer)

bobbert November 6, 2012 at 9:25 pm

This is what PIP would be for, if I had teevee at all. Well, wait, Raptors-Thunder? Nevermind.

JohnnyQuick November 6, 2012 at 8:07 pm

Driving in my car today I turned down the classical music station (that I had FUCKING CRANKED!!) when they went to a 'news break' — I sez out loud: "No, I get my news from Wonkette.'

dogscantlookup November 6, 2012 at 8:07 pm

I've already smoked three packs of cigs today!

SorosBot November 6, 2012 at 8:07 pm

Bill Nelson officiall beats the self-made Connie Mac IV in Florida.

BoroPrimorac November 6, 2012 at 8:27 pm

Saw that. Mack stunk so bad that even the Teabaggers hated him.

Oblios_Cap November 6, 2012 at 9:14 pm

Look out Hooters girls!

fuflans November 6, 2012 at 8:07 pm

i am drinking something called the divining rod.

natl_[redacted]_cmdr November 6, 2012 at 8:11 pm

go on…

Nothingisamiss November 6, 2012 at 9:05 pm

You can't just leave us with that.

bobbert November 6, 2012 at 9:26 pm

"Drinking"?

BumbleKid November 6, 2012 at 8:07 pm

If Bamz wins Florida, I will dislocate my shoulder with fist pumps

glasspusher November 6, 2012 at 8:14 pm

I can already dislocate my shoulders, and will be joining you. I know how you feel.

mille derps November 6, 2012 at 8:14 pm

We will help you to relocate it.

BoroPrimorac November 6, 2012 at 8:28 pm

Puerto Ricans live in central Florida. I am confident they will deliver the state for Bamz.

sati_demise November 6, 2012 at 8:08 pm

9 states Obama to 9 for Rmoney right now. can you tell I am watching Al Jazeera?

Katydid November 6, 2012 at 8:19 pm

is that even legal?

GeneralLerong November 6, 2012 at 8:08 pm

OK, it's 8 minutes after a poll closed somewhere. Who won?

Bezoar November 6, 2012 at 8:08 pm

I'm in Dayton, Ohio, and at 7:30 I got a call from a little old lady in Columbus, on behalf of the Obama campaign, asking if my wife and I still needed to vote, and did we need a ride to the poll! Fucking impressive. Of course, we voted last week, like good progressives.

BadKitty904 November 6, 2012 at 8:13 pm

A tiny hipster came to our door this afternoon to remind us that today is Election Day and gave us a map of where our voting spot is located, with its hours and a number to call if "you have any trouble voting."

VERY impressive groundwork.

Chet Kincaid_ November 6, 2012 at 8:16 pm

You live near The Shire?

BaldarTFlagass November 6, 2012 at 8:14 pm

You mean you looked that gift horse in the mouth and didn't take advantage of the opportunity to go vote again, for free? We're going to lose this election…

snowpointsecret November 6, 2012 at 8:15 pm

Dayton here as well (Actually Huber Heights, but who's counting) and I waited for 25 minutes in line at 7AM. They seemed to have things handled quite well, I just went at the wrong time basically.

BaldarTFlagass November 6, 2012 at 8:22 pm

Cadillac Jack's is my favorite bar. I always make a point to stay at the Hampton right behind there so I can just stumble on back to my room when they close.

snowpointsecret November 6, 2012 at 8:24 pm

Oh really? I've never been there, but there's this really nice Italian place I tried once that's literally next door to that Hampton. It's new but it's really good (if a little expensive but sometimes you feel like treating yourself… And expensive by Huber standards isn't probably all that bad.)

BaldarTFlagass November 6, 2012 at 8:31 pm

I ate at that Italian place last time I was up, in August. Used to be a Mexican place, before that it was a Long John Silvers. During my visit there were only two other couples there; I sure hope their biz picks up or it will be a dang Mongolian Barbecue next time I go. CJ's is a nice local bar, which I alway hunt up when I'm travelling, fuck a TGIFs or Applebee's.

NDeeeZ November 6, 2012 at 8:17 pm

Next round, I'd love a central number to call, letting 'em know I've already voted, so they can concentrate resources on folks who haven't…

bikerlaureate November 6, 2012 at 10:13 pm

Not sure how this could be hackproof…

In FL they have the ability to see who voted early – I guess the volume of data overwhelmed the folks generating the call/canvass reports, but I was getting lists with some names crossed out for the past few days 'cause it had been confirmed that those people had already voted.

johnnymeatworth November 6, 2012 at 8:08 pm

"We're gonna be swimming in more numbers than a Las Vegas bookie!" –Dan Rather

SayItWithWookies November 6, 2012 at 8:08 pm

TPM says the Latino vote is up to 10% from 9% of the popular vote in 2008 — so good news there. http://livewire.talkingpointsmemo.com/entry/preli

Steverino247 November 6, 2012 at 8:11 pm

Unless they're angry/crazy Cubans…

SorosBot November 6, 2012 at 8:17 pm

According to MSBC the areas of Florida with a lot of non-Cuban Latinos still haven't checked in yet; more potential good news.

Terry November 6, 2012 at 8:16 pm

The GOP's immigration laws will hopefully bite the party on the arse

Lot_49 November 6, 2012 at 8:40 pm

For some unaccountable reason, the expression "self-deport" was apparently offensive to many Beaners.

Katydid November 6, 2012 at 8:21 pm

I have personally thanked my daughter's Puerto Rican girlfriend for the upswing in Latino voters. She said we're welcome.

IceCreamEmpress November 6, 2012 at 8:31 pm

I was one of two why people voting at my (Cambridge, Mass) polling place today. The other was a blonde vegan-looking mum whom I am positive was in the tank for one B. Barry "Bammer" Bamz because her three year old son had dreads.

In 2008 we had a big blah turnout at the same polling place, but I have never seen the lah turnout like this.

TheGyrus November 6, 2012 at 8:09 pm

Whenever a conservative weeps tears of bitter sorrow, DRINK!

Terry November 6, 2012 at 8:17 pm

While laughing

BaldarTFlagass November 6, 2012 at 8:09 pm

Ah, Don Julio. There you are in the freezer. What's that you say? I should drink you tonight? You evil Mexican man!

Terry November 6, 2012 at 8:19 pm

I'm leaning towards a nice 12 yr of Yamazaki scotch, a single malt from Japan. May go that way rather than champagne.

HateMachine November 6, 2012 at 9:20 pm

Hey, don't blame him. You knew what Don's answer would be, after all. Why ask if you weren't looking for affirmation?

Jennyjen798 November 6, 2012 at 8:09 pm

I fucking hate Chuck Todd!

savethispatient November 6, 2012 at 8:13 pm

Gingerist!

Jennyjen798 November 6, 2012 at 8:14 pm

No way! I actually have the biggest lady boner for gingers. Except gingers named Chuck Todd!

Jennyjen798 November 6, 2012 at 8:10 pm

Also no ponies, wtf?

DixvilleCrotch November 6, 2012 at 8:10 pm

Benincasa is always the MVP guest! She is our "Center Square," like Charo or something.

SnarkOff November 6, 2012 at 8:14 pm

The Kitty Carlisle of Wonkette.

Mittens Howell, III November 6, 2012 at 8:10 pm

This just in, exit polls show Rafalca voted for Obama from an Ohio glue factory.

Looking good, folks.

DickWharfinger November 6, 2012 at 8:42 pm

A pony pops up so soon.

BaldarTFlagass November 6, 2012 at 8:10 pm

Hey, NYT just called Oklahoma for Romney, and the polls only closed a few minutes ago. I smell a rat.

Bezoar November 6, 2012 at 8:17 pm

Good comic relief, thanx.

glasspusher November 6, 2012 at 8:17 pm

Oklahoma is like infrared…

viennawoods13 November 6, 2012 at 8:18 pm

Hell, Illinois called for Barry with 22 votes in.

FakaktaSouth November 6, 2012 at 8:11 pm

My head is throbbing and I'm a girl, so that is totally a bad thing. Come on come on come on Pres O, I just can't take it.

SorosBot November 6, 2012 at 8:11 pm

Oh noes Chuck Todd is missing!

Jennyjen798 November 6, 2012 at 8:17 pm

Good!

natl_[redacted]_cmdr November 6, 2012 at 8:27 pm

Here's hoping he stays missing.

SorosBot November 6, 2012 at 8:30 pm

No they found him sadly.

NDeeeZ November 6, 2012 at 8:51 pm

I'm NDeeeZ, and I approve this message.

rocktonsam November 6, 2012 at 8:11 pm

FOX NEWS has projected Rmoney winner by 123%

MittBorg November 6, 2012 at 8:24 pm

AGAIN?

GeorgiaBurning November 6, 2012 at 8:35 pm

with 752 electoral votes

MissTaken November 6, 2012 at 8:12 pm

I'm throbbing!

rocktonsam November 6, 2012 at 8:14 pm

LETS ALL GET NAKED!

MittBorg November 6, 2012 at 8:33 pm

Wha'dya mean, "GET"?

MittBorg November 6, 2012 at 8:24 pm

Is SB there, by any chance? (Eyes MissTaken suspiciously)

SorosBot November 6, 2012 at 8:25 pm

I'm watchin' you!

WordSaladNation November 6, 2012 at 8:12 pm

I have a shitload of Hurricane Sandy rations in my house, so I'm going through them SO FAST, along with booze. Have you guys ever eaten mangoes and animal crackers AT THE SAME TIME, while drinking red wine? I heartily recommend it.

SnarkOff November 6, 2012 at 8:15 pm

Don't forget the Planter's peanuts and the chocolate bars.

memzilla November 6, 2012 at 8:25 pm

Maker's Mark and Reese's Cups.

Chet Kincaid_ November 6, 2012 at 8:12 pm

Chuck Todd is circling some peculiar warts on the pud of Florida.

MissTaken November 6, 2012 at 8:15 pm

America's Wang has genital warts? I'm not surprised.

viennawoods13 November 6, 2012 at 8:21 pm

Remonded of the time the Daily show interviewed old floridians about sex. One old coot who basically committed date rape ALL THE TIME had warts, but he said it was ok, cause they went away.

DixvilleCrotch November 6, 2012 at 8:12 pm

Florida is purple and throbbing, and in Chuck Todd's hands currently.

DickWharfinger November 6, 2012 at 8:43 pm

Only hands?

savethispatient November 6, 2012 at 8:12 pm

Dok, I believe NBC News is streaming their coverage tonight on the internets. Although you can probably get that from bunny ears on your tv.

snowpointsecret November 6, 2012 at 8:13 pm

This is looking good so far. Obama's margins in Cuyahoga County are a little above where they probably need to be to win, meaning likely very high turnout.

gullywompr November 6, 2012 at 8:13 pm

Looks like Cantor's gonna keep his seat.

rocktonsam November 6, 2012 at 8:16 pm

crap

GeneralLerong November 6, 2012 at 8:23 pm

Is it the hole on the left, or the one on the right?

MittBorg November 6, 2012 at 8:23 pm

Shit.

mille derps November 6, 2012 at 8:24 pm

Yes, but will he get reelected? Ba-dump-bump…

fuflans November 6, 2012 at 8:49 pm

that wasn't really in doubt was it?

gullywompr November 6, 2012 at 9:11 pm

No, that is a red, red district.

bobbert November 6, 2012 at 9:30 pm

No, but it's nice to fantasize once in a while.

MissTaken November 6, 2012 at 8:13 pm

just heard on NPR – they might win, they might lose, they feel good.

Huh?

SorosBot November 6, 2012 at 8:15 pm

Someone will win, and someone will lose! And some of us will sing the blues. They must get paid big bucks for that kind of insight.

fuflans November 6, 2012 at 8:22 pm

and no concession speech.

tool.

BarackMyWorld November 6, 2012 at 8:13 pm
glasspusher November 6, 2012 at 8:18 pm

Mitt and Paul can sit 'n' spin, as far as I'm concerned

BadKitty904 November 6, 2012 at 8:14 pm

I've been told I have to "take a hot shower and calm down" – brb!

glasspusher November 6, 2012 at 8:18 pm

Shouldn't that be a cold shower then?

weejee November 6, 2012 at 8:27 pm

My experience is that kitties are not too fond of showers, hot or cold. Just sayin'.

natl_[redacted]_cmdr November 6, 2012 at 8:28 pm

Is that a euphemism?

BadKitty904 November 6, 2012 at 8:44 pm

Nope. He's now pouring the wine, "because somebody's gotta do it."

Mittens Howell, III November 6, 2012 at 8:49 pm

wine shower. thumbzup.

Nothingisamiss November 6, 2012 at 9:13 pm

Solves both problems elegantly.

fuflans November 6, 2012 at 8:15 pm

nrp with the HUGE get: angus king from MAINE!

Chet Kincaid_ November 6, 2012 at 8:18 pm

Sounds like a burger chain!

WordSaladNation November 6, 2012 at 8:18 pm

SO GLAD. Went to college in Maine. There are good, good people up there. I will love that place for the rest of my life.

ProgressiveInga November 6, 2012 at 8:15 pm

Looks like vaginas are going to win Missouri Senate race. Suck it Akin. Yay!

glasspusher November 6, 2012 at 8:19 pm

A "legitimate" win!

WordSaladNation November 6, 2012 at 8:15 pm

I'm glad that Rich "Paula Abdul" Abdill is here.

viennawoods13 November 6, 2012 at 8:15 pm

Fuck. Florida just went pink again.

MittBorg November 6, 2012 at 8:22 pm

FL shows Barry at 48.X and Bott at 50.X.

viennawoods13 November 6, 2012 at 8:22 pm

aaaand blue again. I need more tequila.

SorosBot November 6, 2012 at 8:27 pm

NBC.com now has Barry 50% Mittbot 49%.

viennawoods13 November 6, 2012 at 8:25 pm

Jesus, Florida just make up your fucking mind already.

SayItWithWookies November 6, 2012 at 8:33 pm

Hell, why should they start now?

Pres.Beeblebrox November 6, 2012 at 8:41 pm

As someone said yesterday: Florida is doing its best to be Florida again.

Bezoar November 6, 2012 at 8:15 pm

I'm just gonna upfist every comment on this blog. You all deserve it.

gullywompr November 6, 2012 at 8:20 pm

Just the comments? Sad face….

Jerri November 6, 2012 at 8:16 pm

Commence drinking! And continue incessant worrying.

Nothingisamiss November 6, 2012 at 9:14 pm

We should have watched this together. I need this on a tshirt!

MittBorg November 6, 2012 at 8:16 pm

Vagina-Americans just gave Missourah to McCaskill. Ahead by 7-8%.

emmelemm November 6, 2012 at 8:18 pm

Really? And truly?

MittBorg November 6, 2012 at 8:50 pm

Really and TRULY. Man, it's hard to find replies.

viennawoods13 November 6, 2012 at 8:19 pm

Fuck you, Todd Akin.(actually, NEVER fuck Todd akin. ewww)

poorgradstudent November 6, 2012 at 8:19 pm

Being a resident of Missouri by necessity and not by choice, it's nice to have something that makes my exile a little less unpleasant.

BadKitty904 November 6, 2012 at 8:45 pm

Awww…

poorgradstudent November 6, 2012 at 9:32 pm

Thanks for the sympathy, but *fingers crossed* I should be done with my program in 1-2 years, give or take a semester.

IceCreamEmpress November 6, 2012 at 8:32 pm

The vah vote!

viennawoods13 November 6, 2012 at 8:17 pm

Funny. 22 votes counted in Illinois. 11 for O, 11 for R, and already called for Barry.

Barbara_ November 6, 2012 at 8:18 pm

I'm sweating like a Palin daughter who just realized that tampon box remains unopened for the 5th Sunday in-a-row.

finallyhappy November 6, 2012 at 8:19 pm

Excellent analogy!

spareme November 6, 2012 at 8:19 pm

Hahahahha – great one!

freakishlywrong November 6, 2012 at 8:26 pm

Those bitches use pads.

Mittens Howell, III November 6, 2012 at 8:36 pm

Sperm diapers.

Mittens Howell, III November 6, 2012 at 8:36 pm

Shhh … Jesus is watching!

sudsmckenzie November 6, 2012 at 8:38 pm

This is Library of Congress worthy.

Nothingisamiss November 6, 2012 at 9:14 pm

Oh, holy shit I like this.

Nothingisamiss November 6, 2012 at 9:15 pm

Oh, Mittborg, btw,I'm so glad we're both here tonight and may both be celebrating.

snowpointsecret November 6, 2012 at 8:18 pm

I am so proud of myself for convincing a girl in Colorado to vote when she wasn't going to. Swing states need to stick together (or something)!

Barbara_ November 6, 2012 at 8:21 pm

Good job, Snowpoint!

snowpointsecret November 6, 2012 at 8:22 pm

She hasn't come back yet and she left a couple hours ago, I'm assuming long lines (well, and dinner) but once she does I'll mention how things were in Denver where she is.

JohnnyQuick November 6, 2012 at 8:24 pm

You're doing God's work, no snark. I just gave tons and tons of cash, cause I realized people hate talking to me.

gullywompr November 6, 2012 at 8:19 pm

Liz Warren leading…

MissTaken November 6, 2012 at 8:20 pm

Ah yeah!

SaintNixon November 6, 2012 at 8:23 pm

Good…I'ma quit wardancing for a spell…

SorosBot November 6, 2012 at 8:26 pm

Yay Liz! And Mourdock's still down in Indiana.

IceCreamEmpress November 6, 2012 at 8:33 pm

Oh, please baby baby baby please.

Her campaign has been gotv like a wild gotv campaign.

Lionel[redacted]Esq November 6, 2012 at 8:20 pm

Wait, we were supposed to vote today? But I got a letter from the Republican Party that the election is tommorow.

memzilla November 6, 2012 at 8:38 pm

I didn't know you spoke Spanish.

savethispatient November 6, 2012 at 8:20 pm

Anyone watching the NBC thing on Xbox? You get to vote on pointless polls as well as watch NBC "bore in" on things!
Apparently there's some Smart-Glass app thing too, but I don't see anything useful on my iPad.

sudsmckenzie November 6, 2012 at 8:21 pm

Please refer to Chuck Todd in the proper Kings English – it's Fuck Toad.

Fuck Toad November 6, 2012 at 9:05 pm

You rang?

freakishlywrong November 6, 2012 at 8:21 pm

My boy Grayson. Looks good!

PubOption November 6, 2012 at 8:21 pm

While you are waiting for more results, watch the sparks fly as red and blue go at it. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3FpjcOWwiI4&fe

gullywompr November 6, 2012 at 8:21 pm

Bernie Sanders FTW!

Jerri November 6, 2012 at 8:21 pm

God help me I can't get used to a teeny Al Sharpton.

UW8316154 November 6, 2012 at 8:22 pm

FOX shows Romney ahead with a commanding lead…DO.NOT.TRUST

poorgradstudent November 6, 2012 at 8:22 pm

My man Bernie Sanders was reelected!

freakishlywrong November 6, 2012 at 8:27 pm

Love Bernie!

Steverino247 November 6, 2012 at 8:40 pm

Fifty bucks very well spent!

reliefsinn November 6, 2012 at 8:41 pm

Wish he was my Senator! Or that we had a few more like him!

Mittens Howell, III November 6, 2012 at 8:52 pm

Meep Meep!!

Terry November 6, 2012 at 8:22 pm

CNN called the Md Senate race for Ben Cardin, the incumbent. Two idiots who are bringing charges against each other were challenging him. Cardin break a sweat in this one.

finallyhappy November 6, 2012 at 8:32 pm

I actually saw Bongino in person in Howard County a month ago at a senior fair(old people, not HS). Now if only Sobhani takes all of his damn signs down- then they can both go away

JohnnyQuick November 6, 2012 at 8:37 pm

Wow, those two were suing each other? I only saw Bongino signs until a few days ago, when Sobhani's sign placers went fucknutz.

DixvilleCrotch November 6, 2012 at 8:22 pm

What is the drinking game rule for if we have a 269-269 tie?

Or if "unfaithful electors" from the Electoral College decide to put Jill Stein in the White House?

Katydid November 6, 2012 at 8:25 pm

I'm taking a shot each time Romney wins a state. I'm shooting myself if the fucker wins it all.

DixvilleCrotch November 6, 2012 at 8:32 pm

Oh my. I'll be getting tear tattoos under both eyes if Mittens wins.

BadKitty904 November 6, 2012 at 8:48 pm

I'll be learning Dutch and packing…

RufusTFirefly November 6, 2012 at 8:52 pm

I didn't know they speak Dutch in Canada.

mille derps November 6, 2012 at 8:23 pm

Obama still leading in SC with 6% reporting. I guess things'll be changing soon…

VodkaGoGo November 6, 2012 at 8:23 pm

I'm watching ABC where they are all just laughing laughing laughing, having a gay old time. OMG GUYS ELECTIONS ARE SO MUCH FUNZIES!!!

Katydid November 6, 2012 at 8:23 pm

Aw, I'll just bet Kid Zoom is as adorable and funny as his old dad. Does he write a mean blog too?

Doktor Zoom November 7, 2012 at 3:33 am

Give him time, he will, he will…

Barbara_ November 6, 2012 at 8:23 pm

Awesome Dr Jill Biden Tweet:
Richard Mourdock currently losing his Senate race is a gift from God. #Election2012

PubOption November 6, 2012 at 8:26 pm

I felt that knife go in and twist, and I'm in St Louis

Barbara_ November 6, 2012 at 8:26 pm

Good to see you, PubOption.

gullywompr November 6, 2012 at 8:24 pm

Grim faces over on Fox…

Nothingisamiss November 6, 2012 at 9:19 pm

I can't yet bring myself to do it, but if it gets better for us here, I'm going to have to tune in.

fuflans November 6, 2012 at 8:25 pm

IL FOR BAMZ!

glasspusher November 6, 2012 at 8:25 pm

Ohh…the kid switches to NPR, and I have to hide my naked lust for Gwen Ifil…

Jerri November 6, 2012 at 8:25 pm

Fellow wonketeers: I'm drinking and my phone is the best computer in the house. Sorry for the forthcoming typos and fuckups.

courtneyesq November 6, 2012 at 8:25 pm

Nothing says American like this bottle of Veuve Clicquot I'm enjoying…

BadKitty904 November 6, 2012 at 8:49 pm

We're on plain ol' Smoking Loon – which is pretty appropriate for tonight…

WordSaladNation November 6, 2012 at 8:26 pm

Angus King is a good guy. Don't worry about Angus. And, like Olympia Snowe's necklace/earring combos, he's had that moustache since about 1982.

emmelemm November 6, 2012 at 8:30 pm

But what is that "hasn't decided what party to caucus with"? Really?

snowpointsecret November 6, 2012 at 8:31 pm

I think he's just saying that to look independent.

Come here a minute November 6, 2012 at 8:26 pm

Local news says voters will be in line until 10:00 in Prince William County, VA.

mille derps November 6, 2012 at 8:40 pm

Same with Richland Co. in SC. Though the AP has called SC for Romney so some of those folks can just go home now.

Nothingisamiss November 6, 2012 at 9:20 pm

I want to win the popular vote as well. Let's hope folks go away instead of voting for the mormonist but stay for the Bamz.

Nopantsmcgee November 6, 2012 at 8:26 pm

Florida ain't over till the red panhandle votes come in.

glasspusher November 6, 2012 at 8:29 pm

Let us meditate on this truth. Redneck Riviera!

sudsmckenzie November 6, 2012 at 8:39 pm

Americas Taint.

glasspusher November 6, 2012 at 8:54 pm

Nice. I will remember and credit you for that.

glasspusher November 6, 2012 at 8:28 pm

NC is looking better than VA at the moment. WTF?

seppdecker November 6, 2012 at 8:28 pm

Bob Corker? Pfft. Give me Mike Crapo!

freakishlywrong November 6, 2012 at 8:29 pm

Anyone get the feeling they've been cheated. John Lydon/Floriduh.

gullywompr November 6, 2012 at 8:29 pm

Josh Mandel getting his boy scout ass kicked by Brown.

SayItWithWookies November 6, 2012 at 8:29 pm

Obama wins Jersey! All because he made The Boss hug Chris Christie.

snowpointsecret November 6, 2012 at 8:29 pm

If anyone thought there was an enthusiasm problem, I dare them to watch a long line in 29-degree weather and still come away with that thought.

MosesInvests November 6, 2012 at 8:48 pm

Hell, blue Austin in the middle of blood-red Texass had a huge turnout today. Our votes don't count for the White House or Congress, but we were there!

emmelemm November 6, 2012 at 8:49 pm

But local races are important too!

zedbot November 6, 2012 at 8:31 pm

Someone hold the bucket – here comes my Newcastle. *nervousing*

BoroPrimorac November 6, 2012 at 8:32 pm

Chris Murphy beat McMahon in CT.

MittBorg November 6, 2012 at 8:32 pm

The O man is now ahead by 14 EVs, behind by 60K popular vote

SorosBot November 6, 2012 at 8:33 pm

Chris Murphy beats the wrestling lady in Connecticut.

415buzzard November 6, 2012 at 8:35 pm

Thank the Lord.

ffredpalakon November 6, 2012 at 8:33 pm

Some liberal fanatic on CNN is already eulogizing Romney. Oh, wait: that's Bill O'Reilly on Fox. Angus King: please do good noble work in the Senate so twenty years from now, Owen Wilson can play you in an inspiring bio-pic.

sudsmckenzie November 6, 2012 at 8:33 pm

Linda McMahon just blew 100 mill, will caucus with Carly Fiorina.

BoroPrimorac November 6, 2012 at 8:58 pm

Her, Whitman and Fiorina can all go to Jamaica and get fucked.

Misty Malarky November 6, 2012 at 8:34 pm

Mitt projected winner in Georgia!

As goes Georgia, so goes Alabama.

RufusTFirefly November 6, 2012 at 8:34 pm

I voted. And drove two people to the county Board of Elections HQ so they could cast affidavit ballots–they had been thrown off the rolls because the county said they were felons. Which they weren't. This is NY where we actually don't try to disenfranchise people on purpose. I can't imagine what kind of bullshit these folks would have gone through in FL or OH.

Oh, and I just fired up the Volcano. Man, am I baked.

Barbara_ November 6, 2012 at 8:54 pm

Thanks for voting, Cheech!

MissTaken November 6, 2012 at 8:35 pm

Like Candy, I too am white knuckling it here in private.

BumbleKid November 6, 2012 at 8:36 pm

Chuck Todd is bad at anecdotes.

OzoneTom November 6, 2012 at 8:36 pm

Looking up in New Hampshire.

viennawoods13 November 6, 2012 at 8:36 pm

Holy fuck Virginia isn't looking good.

snowpointsecret November 6, 2012 at 8:38 pm

However, Ohio and Florida are looking good so I'm feeling okay about tonight still.

PsycWench November 6, 2012 at 8:38 pm

Yeah but in 2006 it looked like Allen until the very end, when the NOVA votes came in.

viennawoods13 November 6, 2012 at 8:41 pm

But 14% down? Argh.

PsycWench November 6, 2012 at 8:56 pm

9% now. Barry creeps up about every other refresh.

poorgradstudent November 6, 2012 at 8:39 pm

Don't lose hope! The northern VA votes come in last usually!

VodkaGoGo November 6, 2012 at 8:45 pm

Is that Real Virginia?

poorgradstudent November 6, 2012 at 8:39 pm

Also, too, they're pausing the vote counts because there are still people lined up at the polls.

Negropolis November 6, 2012 at 8:39 pm

Don't look at the numbers. It's too close to call, meaning the only thing that matters is where the votes are coming in from. This is going tobe close.

UW8316154 November 6, 2012 at 8:43 pm

Not looking good AT ALL.

OzoneTom November 6, 2012 at 8:57 pm

The NoVA polling places are where the lines are the longest and probably won't start releasing results for another 4-6 hours.

SchemeZ November 6, 2012 at 9:01 pm

Chill. The repub districts report early. Less to count.

snowpointsecret November 6, 2012 at 8:37 pm

CNN: Repeating sayings over and over is obviously useful!

glasspusher November 6, 2012 at 8:52 pm

We gotta play 'em one game at a time…

StillGoinGreen November 6, 2012 at 8:37 pm

I'm so psyched – I only huffed BLUE markers today!!

VodkaGoGo November 6, 2012 at 9:17 pm

I totally forgot I have markers. THANK YOU.

MittBorg November 7, 2012 at 12:05 am

And yet you call yourself GREEN.

glasspusher November 6, 2012 at 8:38 pm

What is up with the NYT web page? Their coverage is glacial compared to the tee vee!

Lot_49 November 6, 2012 at 8:51 pm

It takes a little longer to set the lead type before they print it out and offset print it and scan it to the web. Union rules, they say.

BadKitty904 November 6, 2012 at 8:52 pm

Is there a faster online site? This is making me crazy.

BadKitty904 November 6, 2012 at 8:53 pm

OK, "crazier"…

viennawoods13 November 6, 2012 at 8:54 pm

I've resorted to Huffpo

MittBorg November 7, 2012 at 12:06 am

Affectionately known to the masses as "FluffPoo."

glasspusher November 6, 2012 at 8:55 pm

Yeah, I was thinking leave it to a fucking paper to have a morning and evening edition web page. Right now I want nanosecond trade granularity!

Lot_49 November 6, 2012 at 9:03 pm

Ha! They're still working on having pictures appear with the story they pertain to.

glasspusher November 6, 2012 at 9:06 pm

I don't even bother with their iphone or ipad apps. Their web page has those beat, too.

AlterNewt November 6, 2012 at 8:39 pm

BBC host to reporter in Chicago: "Why aren't you in a bar?"

Veritas78 November 6, 2012 at 8:39 pm

Linda McMahon threw that match again. It's rigged, you know.

Pres.Beeblebrox November 6, 2012 at 8:39 pm

Ha ha, my (and Old Handsome Joe's) home state of Delaware was called for O at like 8:00:00.05.

It was heartening to see the EV totals for O jump up when the East Coast closed.

Now…. OHIO!

FeloniousMonk November 6, 2012 at 8:39 pm

In re knuckles:
"You can believe in the power of music,
You can believe in the power of prayer,
But it's only the white of your knuckles
Keeping this plane in the air."
(Oysterband)

Snarkoluffagus November 6, 2012 at 8:39 pm

Good news for John McCain!! DERP!!

BlueStateLibel November 6, 2012 at 8:40 pm

Has Rmoney announced yet which remote, tiny Alaskan island he's going to exile himself to after he loses?

Veritas78 November 6, 2012 at 8:41 pm

The one called "Cayman."

GeneralLerong November 6, 2012 at 8:45 pm

The one that's going underwater from global warming. Next door to the one inhabited by Eaters of the Raw Flesh.

MittBorg November 7, 2012 at 12:07 am

IT'S A LIE!

Wut?

poorgradstudent November 6, 2012 at 8:46 pm

And hopefully Paul Ryan will relocate to the Liberated Territories of Sahara, a place where his Objectivist/Libertarian ideology is truly in practice.

Veritas78 November 6, 2012 at 8:40 pm

Nice to have a Democrat again in Liebersmeg's old seat.

fuflans November 6, 2012 at 8:40 pm

mourdock in a bad way.

natl_[redacted]_cmdr November 6, 2012 at 8:56 pm

good!

GeorgiaBurning November 6, 2012 at 8:41 pm

Romney supporters here at work expecting their man to win in CA- where do they get such awesome weed?

MittBorg November 7, 2012 at 12:16 am

Clearly we're going to have to waterboard them and find out.

WITH VOTES!

freakishlywrong November 6, 2012 at 8:41 pm

Shitfuckhelldamn. Let's get this shit on, bitches!

Nothingisamiss November 6, 2012 at 9:25 pm

YES!

Not_Mother November 6, 2012 at 8:42 pm

Alan Grayson up 62% w/ 26% counted

fuflans November 6, 2012 at 8:42 pm

WHY does NPR insist on hiring matt continetti? he's terrible and can't even begin to hold his own against, well, anyone but certainly not ej dionne.

why am i posting this on wonkette and not NPR?

snowpointsecret November 6, 2012 at 8:43 pm

Because we're more likely to listen?

Nothingisamiss November 6, 2012 at 9:26 pm

Because you can use all the motherfucking cocksucking adjectives you want?

Jerri November 6, 2012 at 8:42 pm

Massachusetts for Obama, projects msnbc. Why can't Mittens win one of his home states?!??!

C_R_Eature November 6, 2012 at 8:45 pm

What is "Because they all know him" Alex?

JohnnyQuick November 6, 2012 at 8:46 pm

Kolob totals: Romney: 48, Xenu: ∞

Veritas78 November 6, 2012 at 8:53 pm

He was governor here just six years ago and may lose by 30 points. Go figure.

BadKitty904 November 6, 2012 at 8:54 pm

Because he's an evil dick?

Jerri November 6, 2012 at 9:02 pm

Well I just hope the media makes as big a deal out of this as they did when Al Gore lost Tennessee. I'm sure they will.

C_R_Eature November 6, 2012 at 8:42 pm

This situation calls for something Serious. Stand back, everybody:

Ph'nglui Mglw'nafh Cthulhu Pony R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn!

Pres.Beeblebrox November 6, 2012 at 8:46 pm

Do not summon, what thou cannot banish!

fuflans November 6, 2012 at 8:49 pm

thanks CR.

i need distraction.

C_R_Eature November 6, 2012 at 8:56 pm

Distraction, you say? Okay!

snowpointsecret November 6, 2012 at 8:42 pm

It seriously took CNN 42 minutes to project Alabama? Did their computers break?

Lot_49 November 6, 2012 at 8:42 pm

They know who won Ohio and Florida, but also know we'll quit watching if they tell us. Their own damn fault with all this Electoral College count-count scenario stuff.

Not_Mother November 6, 2012 at 8:43 pm

50.7 to 48.5 BRONCO in FLA w/ 35% counted

deanbooth November 6, 2012 at 8:43 pm

Good news only, please. Are you trying to kill me (by talking about votes)?

Joshua Norton November 6, 2012 at 8:43 pm

Would y'all stop posting so fast? I'm also downloading bootleg porn and it takes forever for my screen to refresh.

sudsmckenzie November 6, 2012 at 8:54 pm

Thats why I early downloaded.

StillGoinGreen November 6, 2012 at 8:54 pm

Are you still watching that old *Nailin Palin* pron??!!1!

MissNancyPriss November 6, 2012 at 8:44 pm

What's happening? I am scared and alone. And I am a recovering addict so can not drink or smoke or take, and probably have no business being on this site.

emmelemm November 6, 2012 at 8:45 pm

We offer hugs, free of charge.

MissNancyPriss November 6, 2012 at 8:46 pm

And positive news updates too, right?

AlterNewt November 6, 2012 at 8:47 pm

Should we lie?

emmelemm November 6, 2012 at 8:48 pm

We'll try!

MittBorg November 7, 2012 at 12:17 am

Yeah!

Terry November 6, 2012 at 8:47 pm

Welcome, hon.

C_R_Eature November 6, 2012 at 8:47 pm

No, this is exactly where you need to be. With all of us.

BadKitty904 November 6, 2012 at 8:55 pm

Well said, C-R!

C_R_Eature November 6, 2012 at 9:41 pm

That's the way it is.

MittBorg November 7, 2012 at 12:18 am

I love you all so much. You sweet, crazy maniacs, you.

(tokes deep) Wut?

fuflans November 6, 2012 at 8:50 pm

it is better to not drink or smoke or take with humor and like political views.

UW8316154 November 6, 2012 at 8:51 pm

You're not alone any longer, Miss Nancy….you're among friends now!

freakishlywrong November 6, 2012 at 8:55 pm

I'm alone, and doing all those things. Wonkette will provide. You're among friends,

Nothingisamiss November 6, 2012 at 9:32 pm

So glad to know you're here! (And shit fire, I hate dealing with my anxieties in any sort of healthy way too. But it can be done.)

Pres.Beeblebrox November 6, 2012 at 8:45 pm

O ahead by 200K+ votes in Ohio with 21% in…

Maybe I can stop jerking clumps of my hair out now.

MissNancyPriss November 6, 2012 at 8:47 pm

Bless you, Beeblebrox.

gullywompr November 6, 2012 at 8:45 pm

Historic turnout in VA reported, extended hours due to long lines. Gonna take a while to get reporting from the big districts.

SayItWithWookies November 6, 2012 at 8:48 pm

Especially from the DC suburbs, they're saying. I live in Richmond and it took me about five minutes to vote at 7am.

gullywompr November 6, 2012 at 8:50 pm

Loudoun County (tiny town) – 9 AM, no line, less than 5 minutes.

I did hear there was about a 66% turnout in my little teensy weensy district.

AlterNewt November 6, 2012 at 8:45 pm

Gahhd dammit. Now even BBC is doing Cartoon-o-Graphics

FeloniousMonk November 6, 2012 at 8:51 pm

And this surprises you why? They introduced the swingometer in 1955.

AlterNewt November 6, 2012 at 8:53 pm

Ha!

Wadisay November 6, 2012 at 8:47 pm

Flipping among PBS, CNN, MSNBC and Fox. Honestly, swirling chyrons, graphics, flashing numbers–I'm gong to get a migrane.

MilwaukeeKent November 6, 2012 at 8:48 pm

White knuckling it here in privates. Thinking the political gamble of saving the auto industry was the signature move of Obama's first term. He won (Crossing fingers, toes, knees, elbows, testicles, etc.).

poorgradstudent November 6, 2012 at 8:48 pm

Any word on the gay marriage ballots, fellow Wonketteers?

UW8316154 November 6, 2012 at 8:50 pm

Polls still open in Washington, so no results yet.

WhatTheHeck November 6, 2012 at 8:48 pm

Blood pressure shot to hell.

415buzzard November 6, 2012 at 8:53 pm

Right there with you.

bibliotequetress November 6, 2012 at 8:48 pm

Hi, beloved ones! May everyone find a liberal senator in their stocking tomorrow am! Now I'm off to party withe the ELIZABETHMUTHERFUCKINWARREN posse and hope to be to busy congratulating everyone to check back in before I'm too drunk to check back in. Love to all!

emmelemm November 6, 2012 at 8:51 pm

Woooo! Awesome for you!

C_R_Eature November 6, 2012 at 8:51 pm

Outstanding! Give everybody Terrorist Fist-Bumps for us.

MosesInvests November 6, 2012 at 8:54 pm

Unfortunately, we'll most likely get Teabagger Ted Cruz here in Tejas. Oh, well.

MittBorg November 7, 2012 at 12:20 am

Well, fuck.

trampndirtdown November 6, 2012 at 8:56 pm

Woot! from the land of Larry Craig.

BoroPrimorac November 6, 2012 at 9:04 pm

Ours is blue dog cracker Bill Nelson, but he'll do.

MittBorg November 7, 2012 at 12:19 am

YAY! Give our brand new Senator a big hug and a kiss from all us hopelessly fapping lechers!

Boojum November 6, 2012 at 8:49 pm

I love all you people. Vicodin will do that.

AlterNewt November 6, 2012 at 8:50 pm

Whatever you do, don't snort it.

Boojum November 6, 2012 at 8:55 pm

Ew.

natl_[redacted]_cmdr November 6, 2012 at 8:49 pm

Polls closing in Wisconsin, Minnesota and New York in 10 minutes. Go Blue!

snowpointsecret November 6, 2012 at 8:50 pm

Don't say that too loud in Ohio, they'll take it the wrong way.

Terry November 6, 2012 at 8:49 pm

Linda McMahon is TOAST!

OzoneTom November 6, 2012 at 8:53 pm

Is that bad for Obama? I know that he and she were running-together.

Bezoar November 6, 2012 at 8:49 pm

This may be off-topic, but I need to understand; why is it that so many white people I know, as neighbors, colleagues, relatives, are wonderful people whom you could trust with your life, but who nevertheless are rabidly antipathic to Barack Obama? Seriously, it seems to me, that we need to understand this. I am genuinely befuddled.

fuflans November 6, 2012 at 8:55 pm

as soon as i understand this from my mother i'll let you know.

freakishlywrong November 6, 2012 at 8:56 pm

Blah. Look at them funny. They're racists.

Chet Kincaid_ November 6, 2012 at 8:59 pm

Are you white? If you are, get one of your black friends to introduce him/herself as their neighbor and see what happens.

BoroPrimorac November 6, 2012 at 9:05 pm

They're a bit racist.

415buzzard November 6, 2012 at 8:50 pm

Why the fuck does the NY Times bother painting MI pink with less than 1% reporting, from OAKLAND COUNTY? My old home State, my old County, also home to Willard's prep school………white people, mostly.

Terry November 6, 2012 at 8:51 pm

My kin in Oakland county voted for Obama, but they're lonely

415buzzard November 6, 2012 at 8:56 pm

Mine did too and many of my old friends along with them. But not sure how my 85 year-old dad voted. He is still worked up about gay weddings even though he can't stand Romney….

VodkaGoGo November 6, 2012 at 8:50 pm

BOLD VERY SERIOUS PREDICTION TIME: Ed Gillespie predicts VA for Romney. Ed Gillespie is never wrong.

BoroPrimorac November 6, 2012 at 9:07 pm

Ed Gillespie has a Nazi haircut.

MittBorg November 7, 2012 at 12:21 am

'Cept for today, of course, now that Obama is leading Mittens by nearly 2 points in VA. WOOT!!

Oblios_Cap November 6, 2012 at 8:50 pm

Ha! I hit the 3:45 window and voted w/ no hassles. The workers told me we had a great turn-out.

Those darned Blahs are going to give NC to O'Bama!

DixvilleCrotch November 6, 2012 at 8:50 pm

I can haz celebratory endzone dance yet?

Veritas78 November 6, 2012 at 8:51 pm

Medical marijuana is stomping in Massachusetts, at 64%. Ya know, my back is killing me…

Oblios_Cap November 6, 2012 at 8:54 pm

I took a hit for you, brother!

BoroPrimorac November 6, 2012 at 9:08 pm

No joke, weed is the only thing that soothes my bouts of anxiety.

snowpointsecret November 6, 2012 at 8:51 pm

CNN reporting 4 hour long lines in Virginia. Thanks for closing all those polling places, guys…

Terry November 6, 2012 at 8:54 pm

Va has an asshole for a governor and another one for attorney general, but it also has a lot of African-Americans who are determined to vote and a lot of Dems of various sorts in NoVa. Hopefully, they can prevent the assholes from skewing things.

snowpointsecret November 6, 2012 at 8:55 pm

#stayinline is going to end up trending on twitter soon if it hasn't already. Virginia literally may come down to people standing outside in the cold.

rocktonsam November 6, 2012 at 8:52 pm

turn tee vee off wonkados, sip beverages slowly, keep the one hitter near by, with teh NPR

SigDeFlyinMonky November 6, 2012 at 9:12 pm

Silly, baseball season is over!

415buzzard November 6, 2012 at 8:53 pm

I think I might need to step away from the TV for a few hours so I don't have a nervous breakdown. It's still early here in my nice liberal bubble, San Francisco.

fuflans November 6, 2012 at 8:53 pm

vigo county IN – the apparent fucking presidential oracle of delphi since 1956 – trending for bamz.

Oblios_Cap November 6, 2012 at 8:53 pm

It's over and Barry has won. We gots the Senate, too. Now it's just the networks trying to keep viewers.

Blind pig, acorn, etc.

fuflans November 6, 2012 at 8:56 pm

oh oblios details please!

Oblios_Cap November 6, 2012 at 8:57 pm

I'm in Flor-i-duh, and we're doing fine.

Goonemeritus November 6, 2012 at 8:53 pm

Well I thought I had the stomach for this but I guess I don't. I will rejoin in a few hours when the die is more cast. Until then I wish all our fine Democratic candidates luck and a hope that every Wonketteer gets laid tonight.

fuflans November 6, 2012 at 8:54 pm

doc i hope you're making kid zoom get back on the phone for bamz. only a few more hours i hear.

gullywompr November 6, 2012 at 8:54 pm

Did I mention that people think I look like Daniel Craig?

Terry November 6, 2012 at 8:55 pm

Hubba hubba!

Get a tailored tux pronto.

Jennyjen798 November 6, 2012 at 8:59 pm

Hot?

gullywompr November 6, 2012 at 9:03 pm

That's what they think.

Not that they ever actually say it, but I can tell, that's what they're thinking.

VodkaGoGo November 6, 2012 at 8:55 pm

George Will should stick to analyzing Baseball. No wait, he sucks at that too.

sudsmckenzie November 6, 2012 at 8:56 pm

Wouldnt it be ironic if FL came down to those people still staying in line.

glasspusher November 6, 2012 at 8:56 pm

I forgot my wallet this morning when going to vote. I offered to go back to my house, next door to my polling place, but since I'm in a blue state and was registered for a while, they said no problemo.

emmelemm November 6, 2012 at 8:57 pm

The privileges of being white. (Seriously.)

glasspusher November 6, 2012 at 9:02 pm

I'm sure that's part of it, but in my neighborhood I have plenty of neighbors of all colors, most of whom make more than me. Money, the great leveler.BTW, I am in love with your handle and avatar. Very cute.

emmelemm November 6, 2012 at 9:05 pm

Dawww. My handle is nothing clever – my initials are MLM.

My piggie is definitely flying – looks like a half-black Muslim Kenyan socialist can win the presidency – TWICE!

glasspusher November 6, 2012 at 9:10 pm

That's what I figured, but it still requires a bit of panache to spell it out like that.Go Bamz

natl_[redacted]_cmdr November 6, 2012 at 8:56 pm

So much white-knuckling!

Close_Read November 6, 2012 at 8:57 pm

C'mon, blue electoral votes. Come to mama…

Mojopo November 6, 2012 at 8:57 pm

I haven't eaten ALL DAY. Taking nourishment in the form of tonic water and Jägermeister right now.

Joshua Norton November 6, 2012 at 9:08 pm

Diet Dr. Pepper and gin will also do in a pinch.

trampndirtdown November 6, 2012 at 9:09 pm

Never tried that combo, is it good?

Oblios_Cap November 6, 2012 at 8:57 pm

Other old people suck!

WhatTheHeck November 6, 2012 at 9:00 pm

and wear funny clothes with flags and eagles

VodkaGoGo November 6, 2012 at 8:58 pm

If Obama wins tonight, does that mean tomorrow is the launch of unskewedelectoralcollege.com?

Veritas78 November 6, 2012 at 9:11 pm

Faithless electors rock!

C_R_Eature November 6, 2012 at 8:58 pm

And now is the time in the show where we see the Election Night Special!

natl_[redacted]_cmdr November 6, 2012 at 8:58 pm

Michigan on the NYT site is leaning blue. How can any of the auto workers vote for Romney?

Barbara_ November 6, 2012 at 8:58 pm

Awesome Tweet:
Dick Morris ‏@DickMorrisTweet
#election2012 60% of Florida in, down by 2. worried

Suck it, sir. I said, suck it!

trampndirtdown November 6, 2012 at 9:09 pm

TOES!!!!

Franknflower November 6, 2012 at 8:58 pm

Does anyone know the geography of the penis?

Barbara_ November 6, 2012 at 9:00 pm

Yes, the capitol is Tallahassee.

FeloniousMonk November 6, 2012 at 9:10 pm

Hee hee hee. Reminded me of my favourite cartoon from 2000.

ffredpalakon November 6, 2012 at 8:59 pm

Maybe Nate Silver and scientific methodology will survive this intact.

@KrystalBall1

Telling. RT @DickMorrisTweet: #election2012 60% of Florida in, down by 2. worried

Mojopo November 6, 2012 at 8:59 pm

FYI – Tammy Duckworth is kicking ass!

emmelemm November 6, 2012 at 9:03 pm

Have Wisconsin polls closed?

trampndirtdown November 6, 2012 at 9:12 pm

Yep O by 10

Veritas78 November 6, 2012 at 9:14 pm

Given that she has no legs, that IS impressive!

natl_[redacted]_cmdr November 6, 2012 at 8:59 pm

Polls closing in my home states of MN and WI. If they don't go blue I'm gonna be so frickin pissed.

Dashboard Buddha November 6, 2012 at 8:59 pm

Just looked at NPR. Rmoney 88 electoral votes, Barry 65. :-(

Oblios_Cap November 6, 2012 at 9:01 pm

Dude, it's the red states that R-Money was projected to win. O's going to go behind at first.

they just are calling some mid-wests for O.

MissNancyPriss November 6, 2012 at 9:00 pm

Romney is just winning the shit States, right?

trampndirtdown November 6, 2012 at 9:13 pm

Absolutely, get yer towel out and Don't Panic!

Not_Mother November 6, 2012 at 9:00 pm

Good news for the Obama campaign. CNN's Peter Hamby tells Candy Crowley that the Romney campaign's most recent internal polling showed President Obama up by five in the crucial swing state of Ohio.

Terry November 6, 2012 at 9:01 pm

NPR has a nice summary table on its website: http://election2012.npr.org/bigboard/president.ht

BaldarTFlagass November 6, 2012 at 9:01 pm

Fuck me, this is going to take hours, I'll be shitfaced if I keep up this rate. I think I'm gonna take a break.

trampndirtdown November 6, 2012 at 9:14 pm

In the words of Body by Jake, "Don't Quit"

natl_[redacted]_cmdr November 6, 2012 at 9:01 pm

New York! Michigan!

Negropolis November 6, 2012 at 9:01 pm

Michigan already called for Obama!

415buzzard November 6, 2012 at 9:05 pm

Another state where Romney lived that hates him!

gullywompr November 6, 2012 at 9:10 pm

Yes, but what height are the trees?

trampndirtdown November 6, 2012 at 9:14 pm

Bazinga!

Oblios_Cap November 6, 2012 at 9:20 pm

To know him is to loathe him!

courtneyesq November 6, 2012 at 9:02 pm

MICHIGAN!!! GO BLUE!!!

Terry November 6, 2012 at 9:04 pm

Literally!

Let Detroit go bankrupt, suck it Romney.

rocktonsam November 6, 2012 at 9:06 pm

WELL DONE BLUE!

snowpointsecret November 6, 2012 at 9:02 pm

CNN calls Michigan for Obama already, which is an hour faster than Mississippi.

glasspusher November 6, 2012 at 9:04 pm

Florida continues to tease. Motherfucker

VodkaGoGo November 6, 2012 at 9:04 pm

Michigan for Obama!!! You know what they say, as goes Detroit, so goes the nation, eventually. You people are all fucked just like me mwahahahaha.

gullywompr November 6, 2012 at 9:05 pm

w00t! Suck your own fucking machine gun, Nugent!

C_R_Eature November 6, 2012 at 9:08 pm

The reason could have been something about suggesting that Detroit go bankrupt, but that's just a guess.

VodkaGoGo November 6, 2012 at 9:11 pm

Yeah, I think he figured out how stupid a thing to say that was after the primary here.

SchemeZ November 6, 2012 at 9:04 pm

Let Detroit go bankrupt. Sorry Willard you're 0 for 2 in home states.

Not_Mother November 6, 2012 at 9:04 pm

Bill O'Reilly is already getting the excuses ready if Romney loses the election — O'Reilly already blaming a potential Romney loss on Hurricane Sandy. That's good, friends.

PlanetWingNut November 6, 2012 at 9:05 pm

ok ok im here…and nervous as hell who wants to get me a beer!!!!! I CANT TAKE THIS…TOO MANY STUPID PEOPLE IN THIS COUNTRY!!!!

Barbara_ November 6, 2012 at 9:05 pm

NBC calls Massachusetts for Elizabeth Warren (D). She replaces Sen. Scott Brown (R).

Veritas78 November 6, 2012 at 9:07 pm

Woohoo! That's big, and wasn't certain by any means. What a relief.

SchemeZ November 6, 2012 at 9:09 pm

Yeah my votes counts!

rocktonsam November 6, 2012 at 9:14 pm

so is it "happy trails to you" for brown?

Close_Read November 6, 2012 at 9:14 pm

…exhales…

well, that's one down.

Tilley November 6, 2012 at 9:05 pm

Hey! Just got here. Anything happening yet?

C_R_Eature November 6, 2012 at 9:07 pm

Many of us are Drunk. Some have pants on.

Barbara_ November 6, 2012 at 9:09 pm

Many of us are pants. Some have drunks on.

Tilley November 6, 2012 at 9:11 pm

Looks like I'm in the right place! So why can't I figger out how to refresh this dang thing? Everything is all crazy! Or maybe it's my pants-less drunkenness.

trampndirtdown November 6, 2012 at 9:20 pm

Try F5

rocktonsam November 6, 2012 at 9:11 pm

drinking pants

Oblios_Cap November 6, 2012 at 9:13 pm

I'm already low on rum! This shit sucks!

ffredpalakon November 6, 2012 at 9:07 pm

@TNYJohnCassidy

FL, almost 2/3 vote in: O 51, R 47. If Mittster doesn't turn it around, the election is over.

Not_Mother November 6, 2012 at 9:07 pm

NBC calls Massachusetts for Elizabeth Warren (D). She replaces Sen. Scott Brown (R).

Terry November 6, 2012 at 9:12 pm

Thank you, Jesus

snowpointsecret November 6, 2012 at 9:07 pm

CNN projects Republicans keep control of the House. In other news, the sky is blue.

saggyboobedhag November 6, 2012 at 9:08 pm

chuck todd just spoke about florida for 2 or 3 minutes and I'm pretty sure he didn't finish a sentence.

Oblios_Cap November 6, 2012 at 9:08 pm

I've got a brand new waterbed
filled up with Elmer's Glue.

So baby, why don't we get drunk and screw?

Nopantsmcgee November 6, 2012 at 9:09 pm

WTF Ohio and PA , come on. These drugs won't last forever you know!

Terry November 6, 2012 at 9:40 pm

Penna is going for Barry

Dr. Nick Riviera November 6, 2012 at 9:40 pm

CNN and Huffpo haven't called it

Negropolis November 6, 2012 at 9:09 pm

CNN exits show Wisconsin for Obama 52%.

Not_Mother November 6, 2012 at 9:10 pm

we already knew but: GOP will keep the House, CNN says

Oblios_Cap November 6, 2012 at 9:12 pm

God Damn the TeaTards!

Oblios_Cap November 6, 2012 at 9:10 pm

It's still daylight in Va, according to CBS. WTF?

courtneyesq November 6, 2012 at 9:11 pm

Florida is so freaking close. I can't breathe.

Mittens Howell, III November 6, 2012 at 9:11 pm

Chuck Todd just drew the world's biggest cock ring on Florida.

snowpointsecret November 6, 2012 at 9:12 pm

Also: Obama up 180,325 with 27% counted in Ohio. I'm proud of my state right now.

Terry November 6, 2012 at 9:15 pm

If Ohio goes for Obama, I promise not to grumble under my breath the whole time I'm driving on the Ohio Turnpike

Not_Mother November 6, 2012 at 9:13 pm

Bronco GAINING in Ohio. 54.8% w/ 7% counted

glasspusher November 6, 2012 at 9:15 pm

FL is going down to the wire again. Let's hope it's irrelevant, so the vote count isn't 5-4

gullywompr November 6, 2012 at 9:15 pm

PENNSYLVANIA!!!!

Negropolis November 6, 2012 at 9:15 pm

Obama wins PA. Republican fools gold.

Jerri November 6, 2012 at 9:15 pm

Did Warren really just take Teddy's seat back? Yesssss! Here's hoping she keeps it as long as he did, unless by some miracle she makes it to the White House in our lifetimes.

Doktor Zoom November 6, 2012 at 9:15 pm
Pres.Beeblebrox November 6, 2012 at 9:15 pm

PA just called for O. What was that about Romentum in PA?

FakaktaSouth November 6, 2012 at 9:15 pm

I cannot believe my whole life is coming down to what Cleveland does. Way to go Pennsylvania! God this night is taking forever.

VodkaGoGo November 6, 2012 at 9:16 pm

PA is looking muthah fuckin tiz-zight! Casey won in a blowout.

C_R_Eature November 6, 2012 at 9:16 pm

We're been waiting so long
We're been waiting so long
We're been waiting for the sun to rise and shine
Shining still
Give us the Will.

bobbert November 6, 2012 at 9:40 pm

I'm here to tell you I've made my choice.

C_R_Eature November 6, 2012 at 9:40 pm

Just one Victory and we're on our way.

Oblios_Cap November 6, 2012 at 9:16 pm

O won PA. Go my peeps!

MissNancyPriss November 6, 2012 at 9:17 pm

For reals?

Oblios_Cap November 6, 2012 at 9:19 pm

oh,yeah!

BadKitty904 November 6, 2012 at 9:23 pm

Dang!

SchemeZ November 6, 2012 at 9:21 pm

Pennsyl-fuckin-vania What a wasted head fake.

Nothingisamiss November 6, 2012 at 9:17 pm

Said the same fucking thing to my friend just the other day.

gullywompr November 6, 2012 at 9:17 pm

Klobachar!

kakotechnia November 6, 2012 at 9:18 pm

Jesus, the NBC million flag kaleidoscope makes me woozy.

Not_Mother November 6, 2012 at 9:18 pm

romney 49.6 to 49.5 in FLA, 62% counted

BadKitty904 November 6, 2012 at 9:23 pm

Well, hell…

greypanter November 6, 2012 at 9:18 pm

Which was is the Supreme Court Leaning with their infinite Electoral College votes?

Lazy Media November 6, 2012 at 9:21 pm

I hate to be critical, but I believe that our editrix et. al. are inebriated.

Oblios_Cap November 6, 2012 at 9:22 pm

I'm doing my best!

SchemeZ November 6, 2012 at 9:24 pm

Who isn't?

GeneralLerong November 6, 2012 at 9:31 pm

Let's hope so.

Terry November 6, 2012 at 9:21 pm

Penna: 68% for Obama so far! My cousin up there says that the local stations are calling it for Obama

courtneyesq November 6, 2012 at 9:21 pm

Can't decide: CNN's fancy map skills, or Chris Matthews and Rachel Maddow's witty retorts and willingness to call Romney a liar??? Choices, choices…

Oblios_Cap November 6, 2012 at 9:23 pm

"Leans Obama" . So he's won those.

Nothingisamiss November 6, 2012 at 9:24 pm

Oh?

Terry November 6, 2012 at 9:24 pm

F'ing Macaca Allen is leading in Va

Come here a minute November 6, 2012 at 9:31 pm

Don't buy it. Kaine outperforming Bronco — and the polls all show about a tie for Romney/Obama in VA.

Oblios_Cap November 6, 2012 at 9:25 pm

Apparently the Latinos don't like the Mormons either!

BadKitty904 November 6, 2012 at 9:26 pm

I think I'm too old for this shit…

emmelemm November 6, 2012 at 9:29 pm

Aren't you, like, 21?

BadKitty904 November 6, 2012 at 9:36 pm

23, thank you VERY much…

MittBorg November 7, 2012 at 12:25 am

Jesus, a fucking BABY spring chicken.

BadKitty904 November 7, 2012 at 12:38 am

Hey, now! No ageist bushwa, IF you please.

I'm exactly as old as I should be. As are you.

SchemeZ November 6, 2012 at 9:31 pm

Obama's got Wisconsin!

Oblios_Cap November 6, 2012 at 9:29 pm

Where's Actor? Already passed out?

courtneyesq November 6, 2012 at 9:30 pm

That's it. I'm moving to Florida.

sudsmckenzie November 6, 2012 at 9:30 pm

WI goes O, like I told tonights doorknocker it would, after I gave him a beer!

Oblios_Cap November 6, 2012 at 9:32 pm

Willard has about won all the states that he's going to. Stick a fork in the bastard.

Terry November 6, 2012 at 9:35 pm

Lets hope so. I'm sick of him leading in the electoral count.

Butch_Wagstaff November 6, 2012 at 10:04 pm

Go Vols!!

sudsmckenzie November 6, 2012 at 9:33 pm

The tip of FL is getting ready to Cum all over us – with votes!

Nothingisamiss November 6, 2012 at 9:33 pm

Is there any show doing Muppets as commentators? 'Cause I suddenly think that would be awesome.

slowhansolo November 6, 2012 at 9:34 pm

Interesting local aside in Pa.: Not only did O and Casey sweep, but a Democrat with an unhealthy curiosity about Tom Corbett's Sandusky investigation just won attorney general.

MittBorg November 7, 2012 at 12:25 am

THANK YOU!!

Terry November 6, 2012 at 9:36 pm

Couldn't stand to wait any longer, broke into the champagne to calm my nerves.

Oblios_Cap November 6, 2012 at 9:37 pm

"What are the voters telling us?"

Willard sucks!

sudsmckenzie November 6, 2012 at 9:39 pm

Say hello, again, to Representative Grayson!

SchemeZ November 6, 2012 at 9:39 pm

Invasive procedures for $200 Alex.

Zango Crudmonger November 6, 2012 at 9:40 pm

Wonkette, I say goodbye for a few hours to stimulate the local stripper economy and hopefully celebrate in an hour or two when I can divert my gaze to the tv above the bar.

Cheers, ya bastards.

sudsmckenzie November 6, 2012 at 9:42 pm

Warren Wins!!

Terry November 6, 2012 at 9:42 pm

Pennsylvania for Barry! All my Hunky relatives in the coal towns near Altoona and Johnstown are whooping it up!

gullywompr November 6, 2012 at 9:43 pm

New blog up, folks….

Terry November 6, 2012 at 9:46 pm

In Maryland, the Dream Act is winning with 68% of the vote! Yay! Same sex marriage is up at 55%!

courtneyesq November 6, 2012 at 9:47 pm

Congrats Senator-elect Warren — one more step toward equal representation of women in the Senate.

Nopantsmcgee November 6, 2012 at 10:47 pm

I'm starting to think our Kenyan Overlord is going to be around to give the Tea People something to shout about for another four years.

But, I could be wrong. They very well could continue to shout at him for decades to come.

ttommyunger November 7, 2012 at 10:19 am

Coming in late, intertoobs wouldn't let me comment last night. It's times like this that I'm sorry I quit smoking. A Camel would go good right about now, considering the fucking we just gave Mittens.

viennawoods13 November 6, 2012 at 8:32 pm

Oh yes. YES!

Nothingisamiss November 6, 2012 at 9:02 pm

But not on either one of us.

Chichikovovich November 6, 2012 at 8:33 pm

But for the nba players going to Europe isn't returning home where you can get good pickled herring or borcht like babushka made.

glasspusher November 6, 2012 at 8:35 pm

Gotta pace yourself, my friend- hang in there! Fuck, I have to be on a “science advisory panel” at my kid's school tomorrow night, so I can't get crazy tonight or I will look and feel worse tomorrow.

snowpointsecret November 6, 2012 at 8:35 pm

It's been featured in the paper since then, it seems more popular now. I don't remember the Mexican place but I remember the Long John Silver's.

Half the time I just go to C's because we know the owners though… (why are we talking about places to eat and drink in Huber Heights on an election blog— oh right we're waiting for important numbers which are only trickling in)

If you need on-topic things look good in Ohio for Obama so far!

SorosBot November 6, 2012 at 8:37 pm

I was only thinking of the other home for hockey players, eh.

SorosBot November 6, 2012 at 8:41 pm

Cantor at least is just an asshole, not nuts; and assuming the Reps keep the house (which they probably will, but with a slimmer margin) he may be preparing to shiv Boehner for the speakership.

sarjo November 6, 2012 at 8:41 pm

You'd better prepare 2 talks, in case of new overlords. 1: Science is how we know what's true; 2: Science is for fools too dumb to be businessmen.

glasspusher November 6, 2012 at 8:55 pm

Rilly. It's an economic engine, or it's a job killer!

Limeylizzie November 6, 2012 at 9:09 pm

I bet he would be awful in the sack. Selfish and self-involved.

emmelemm November 6, 2012 at 9:15 pm

True story: long ago, like in the 90s, I had this joke that my terrorist name was Emm el-Emm. (Get it?) After 9/11, that didn't seem quite as funny.

Now, though, I just use the whole thing run together for a username on most/many sites because it's usually not taken.

glasspusher November 6, 2012 at 9:22 pm

yeah, I tell people I join wires together with Moqtadr Al-SolderI wanted to name our son Zubenelgenubi (the right claw of the scorpion), but his mom said no..

Butch_Wagstaff November 6, 2012 at 9:31 pm

Cantor's constituents are just like him. They got daddy's money & the smug attitude that comes with it. But they're not nuts.

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