Hello, millennial children of the digital age! You probably think you’re pretty “cool” if you take a picture of yourself voting for Obama and then post it on your favorite social media networking time-wasting porn sites, so your friends can see that you’re a liberal chump like them. In this sense voting is like every other activity in your shallow, overshared life. But unlike the artfully filtered pictures of your homemade meals that you put on Instagram and all those nude selfies you stuck on MySpace in 2006 and then forgot about, those photos of your ballots are actually illegal in most states, and thus count in reverse, for Mitt Romney!
The Wall Street Journal’s All Things D somehow managed to beat Buzzfeed FWD to this tech/election overlap thingie, and explains about why you shouldn’t put pictures of your completed ballot online. This is mostly because we have “secret ballot” laws that make it illegal to take photos in polling places, which protects you from having a boss or some other person in authority over you demanding that you take a picture in a polling place, of your ballot, so they can fire you when you don’t vote for Romney. Also you can’t take pictures of your fellow voters, because that’s creepy. Why do you want to be creepy? Putting up pictures of your ballots won’t actually invalidate your vote, but one guy actually had his phone taken away for doing it, and for your average young person losing a precious smartphone is a million times worse than the thought of a Romney Administration, so be sure not to do this. [WSJ ATD]
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Anthony Weiner tried to instagram his ballot but his penis kept getting in the way.
Teh ballot is that small?
It was just a baby's arm holding an apple. The babies hide under the machines.
Damn that Twenty-Sixth Amendment!
Once tapped, a keg cannot be untapped!
I would go back to a black rotary dial phone to keep Romney from office.
Dial 'O' for Obama…
And dial 'M" for RMoney.
Win!
I would learn Morse Code to keep Rmoney from office.
Every grown man from my office is putting up ballot selfies on Facebook like a fucking teenage girl today. God Bless America.
So this was Romney's secret weapon to get votes invalidated?
Well he is still hoping to find a way invalidate all blah and latino votes.
Silly, blahs and latinos can't afford cell phones! Unless they're Obamaphones…
seriously, if Candidate B gets elected i'[m moving to canada.
Why vote if no one sees you do it?
If no one sees, did it really happen?
Using instagram for anything should get you punched in the taint.
I'm going to wait until later tonight to get a snap of me popping a Champagne cork, with no pants on of course.
In honor of another Barry win, I plan on having my cork popped tonight. But it won't be Champagne. HEY-O!
Yowza!
If you can pop a champagne cork with it, you are one talented guy.
I have a bottle of champagne iced and ready for that magical moment when FOX News projects Obama the winner.
SchadenBubbly.
Obviously, this is going to be later than the other major news outlets declare, so I hope I'm sober enough to get that cork out when it finally happens.
be very, very careful with that cork if you're not wearing pants….
This is bad news for those scrapbooking enthusiasts! oh, wait…
What if you post a pic of yourself NOT voting for Romney?
Supermax.
Gitmo.
I'll take polling place Creepshots for the Win Alex.
I would never photograph the dozen or so ballots I cast at several polling places this morning. That would be illegal and wrong.
Congratulations! Your post will be featured on Free Republic today as rock-solid evidence of voter fraud!
Well thank God I didn’t mention that I am undocumented.
Oh pleasepleaseplease tell me you are a drug dealer, too?
Worse: He works for Acorn.
You mean a Pfizer rep?
And I assume you are Muslim as well.
Nah; of the wingnut sites I've checked out today, Free Republic is the only one not running with constant "NEW BLACK PANTHERS!" "VOTING FRAUD!" bullshit; instead, it's all "THE POLLS ARE ALL SKEWED! This is how you know Romney is really going to win in a blowout!"
The Freepers seem to be in denial, while the other wingnut sites seem to be on to anger.
Romney tied Obama in a tiny, whelmingly Republican town in New Hampsire! That also went whelmingly for all the local-race republicans, meaning Romney's trailing local Republicans by 20-30 points (2-3 people)!
Clearly this means a Romney landslide, because this ten-voter New Hampshire town is not completely irrelevant to everything.
The freepers sersiously tried to cast Dixon Hills as a "Deep Blue Democrat (sic) town", on account of its 3 Registered Republicans, 2 Registered Democrats, and 5 Independent/Uncommitted/Other.
Yeah, the self-delusion there is amazing. Also Romney's rally in Pennsylvania means he MUST be winning, and they're calling him "President-elect Romney". But Breitbart, NR, RedState are all "Black Panthers! Voter Fraud!! ARGH ARGH BLACK PEOPLE!!1!"
My reliable teabagger pal tells me the latest theory making the rounds on wingnut email chains and rant-blogs goes something like this:
1. Blacks vote early
2. Exit polls will show Obama winning
3. Other blacks won't bother voting, because lazy (the ones who don't get up early, that is)
4. Hard-working Real Americans™ will vote after work (in wingnuttistan, they have jobs), and of course they're all for Romney, because they're Real Americans™.
5. Mitt wins!
Personally, I'm going with: Liberal, rational people are seriouly pissed at all this GOP assholery, and they're gonna vote come hell or high water.
What about all the white people I know who voted at 6 a.m. on their way to work?
The irony that the blue states subsidize the red ones isn't lost on me.
Did the Black Panthers hold the door for you? How nice!
Black Panther. Singular.
Has anyone told Sean Insannity?
He twatted one. Hang that man for treason. With votes!
I had to take a few shots of my ballot . . . It just couldn't get the duck face right.
Obama gives them phones, and Romney takes them away. Promise kept.
Porn is NOT a waste of time
And definitely don't take pictures of the Michigan Militia asking voters for ID, because they won't like it.
Upskirt ballot box money shots. Also. Too.
What's all this about an election?
Yes there is. It's only in Ohio.
Don't ask me. I stopped watching American Idol after the third season.
It's in my pants…. Sorry, I thought you were asking about an erection. Never mind, it's gone too. Also.
Oh, that's very different.
Something going on in Ohio, apparently. Not sure what it means for the rest of us.
Election day 2012, where Mitts learns that 2nd place only qualifies you as the first loser.
Oh man, I'm feeling pretty smart now about just taking the I Voted sticker pic, regardless of the looks I got from the old lady pollsters when I ripped off my shirt. Hey old ladies, the rule is TITS OR GTFO, what else could I do???
And I want to thank you again for that lovely snapshot!
PICS or GTFO
I like a girl that plays by the rules.
Tell Barb & Lizzie, pleeeeeze. Thankyouverymuch!
Q: How much does a hipster weigh?
A: An Instagram
You don't grind mirrors, do ya?
Finally, finally, somebody gets the reference! How about you, prommie? Regardless, you are truly a renaissance man.
I don't grind my own, but I gots me an old red-tube Coulter, 8 inch, and a 100 mm celestron refractor, and one of those little meade 90 mm Maks.
Nice. I don't own any of those fancy-pants store-bought scopes, but I've ground and figured a 4.5 inch, about eight 6 inchers, an 8 inch, two 10 inchers, and my crown jewel, a 18.5 inch, 21 mm thick at the edge, plate glass. No turned down edge, I really lucked out. Best compliment I got was looking at Saturn with it at 500x with a friend and real pro down in Florida, very steady air, and he asked, “got another Barlow?”As Dave Barry says, “There's a fine line between a hobby and a mental illness”, and I can't even see that line from where I am…
We will see what bubbles up to the top…
all those nude selfies you stuck on MySpace in 2006
If they're from 2006, then I damn sure look a lot better naked in them than I do in person today.
I'm still taking a photo of my ballot. This is the last time I'll get to vote for a Muslim!
You never know; Hillary might convert.
I mean she has been spending a suspicious amount of time in the Middle East, lately.
Hannity actually did tweet his ballot. Dumbass.
"which protects you from having a boss or some other person in authority over you demanding that you take a picture in a polling place, of your ballot, so they can fire you when you don’t vote for Romney. "
But why would we need that? I mean it's not as if there's been a huge rash of employers threatening their employee's jobs if they voter for Obama or anything…
http://thinkprogress.org/election/2012/10/25/1087… http://www.slate.com/blogs/the_slatest/2012/10/27… http://www.theatlanticwire.com/politics/2012/10/r…
I always get confused at the term "millennial." First, I think of really really old people (1,000 years old?) and then I think oh, people who are involved in hat designing. It really takes me a while to figure out what the fuck a millennial is. How about you just say "dipshit who tucks his/her ears into their baseball cap." I see why you don't say that, it takes too long.
And then there's the Pre-Millennial/Post-Millennial beef. Be not deceived!! http://www.deceptioninthechurch.com/premilpostmil…
And there's this
Did you know that if you rotate the cap 180 degrees, that flat part will keep the sun out of your eyes?
but if you do that, i think that all of the swag falls off the hat or something?
But vote rigging, voting machine tampering, and voter intimidation *are* OK, right?
Yes. So please continue.
It is illegal to photograph irregularities!
It was the first time my dogs voted so I had to take snapshots – you know, for their memory book. Don't judge me.
I'm not going to take a picture of my ballot. I was planning on photocopying it instead.
i'm glad to see Chrysler gave their employees the whole day off to vote.
So I can't take pictures of the legions of New Black Panther's beating up the Whites? That explains why the MSM isn't covering this!
I have already started celebrating. The campaigning is over! Really enjoying my 3rd Sapphire martini this morning!!!
YEEEEEEHAAAAAAWWW!!!!!!!
Go O!!!
Wait, I'm voting for pot and to allow the Ghayez to bet married. Isn't my whole ballot already illegal and damned by God?
Anathema! You are an outcast unclean!
And just so I understand all these modern rules, I can still take a picture of my penis while voting and tweet that, correct?
How about pics of you voting with your penis?
Can I vote for your penis?
I posted a pic of my ballot — but I voted Clouded Sulphur. Those Lizard People have been a constant disappointment.
I know. You think the Lizard People will finally make a change in government, but then they get into office, and all they do is lay around under heat lamps eating crickets.
I'm not comfortable making fun of millennials today. We need their young blood at the polls. Tomorrow, no problem.
Krystal Ball tweeted a picture of herself voting in a reindeer dildo hat.
I remember her!
She's now a frequent MSNBC pundit, particularly on Lawrence O'Donnell and Chris Hays, and is awesome still.
She's on MSNBC all the time, sans dildo.
Really? Shit, Bruno was right, all it takes to get famous is a sex tape; or a dildo hat faux fellatio pic, I guess.
Yeah, she is on that midday MSNBC show with the 3 other hip Manhattanites (last I heard), and Lawrence O'Donnell has her on practically every night.
InstaAcorn App !!
OT: Enjoy, Ohio; tomorrow the whole Country will revert to not giving the slightest fuck about you again (aside from the DOJ Investigations for voting irregularities).
And sometimes she's even a guest on his show.
Tamron Libel!!
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