DON'T REVENGE! RELOAD!  10:26 am November 6, 2012

Noted Historian Sarah Palin Thinks Barack Obama Is Just Like Robespierre, If She Knew Who Robespierre Was

by Rebecca Schoenkopf

starburstsFormer half-term GILF and current Facebook celebrity Sarah Palin thinks Barack Obama is a very bad man. What did the Kenyan Usurper do this time? He said “Voting is the best revenge.” As you can imagine, this is the biggest threat the Republic has ever known except for that one time some New Black Panthers held the door to the polling place open for an old white lady.

You know what they always say: first they get their revenge “with votes,” and the next thing you know it is an appointment with Mme. Guillotine. Why does Barack Obama want to cut the heads off all the Republicans, by voting? INPEACH!

 
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{ 161 comments }

glasspusher November 6, 2012 at 10:28 am

Remember the Klingon proverb that said: "Voting is a dish that is best served cold"?

sbj1964 November 6, 2012 at 10:31 am

It is very cold in space.Kahn.

glasspusher November 6, 2012 at 10:49 am

How very, very…improbable.

actor212 November 6, 2012 at 10:34 am

Really? Because I prefer mine barbecued.

glasspusher November 6, 2012 at 10:49 am

If you go to a Korean restaurant, there's no reason you can't have both.

Generation[redacted] November 6, 2012 at 10:39 am

You can't appreciate Fox News until you hear it in the original Klingon.

glasspusher November 6, 2012 at 10:50 am

Probably the only way they could apply a veneer of honor…

Graham Cracker November 6, 2012 at 11:47 am

So true! Most of what they say looses something in the translation.

Cleopatriot November 6, 2012 at 10:28 am

Who?

actor212 November 6, 2012 at 10:34 am

Her. Again.

Cleopatriot November 6, 2012 at 10:37 am

I refuse to know who that is.

DaniloTifoso November 6, 2012 at 10:54 am

WHEN WILL THIS IRRELEVANT NOBODY DISAPPEAR???

Jus_Wonderin November 6, 2012 at 10:28 am

Damn, Rebecca, you have the blog pedal to the metal!!

Obligatory: "STFU, Sarah Palin!"

BadKitty904 November 6, 2012 at 10:28 am

The shrill sound of failure and the acrid smell of despair…

glasspusher November 6, 2012 at 10:29 am

Shrill and despairing on Fox, crazy in the sack? Sorry, Sarah, you don't do it for me any more…

An Asexual Ungulate November 6, 2012 at 10:34 am

That's what that smell is? I thought it was hot garbage and something that died under the porch a couple weeks ago. Thanks! You saved me some serious crawlspace time.

SigDeFlyinMonky November 6, 2012 at 11:52 am

Smells like burning resistors.

Fare la Volpe November 6, 2012 at 10:34 am

No, that's her Moose~Knuckle parfum

BadKitty904 November 6, 2012 at 10:40 am

These folks are whistling past the graveyard and it's becoming obvious that they know it…

RomneysLogCabin November 6, 2012 at 10:41 am

and here I thought that smell was aborted fetuses

fishskicanoe November 6, 2012 at 10:28 am

Let them eat muktuk.

Not_So_Much November 6, 2012 at 10:29 am

Robespierre is that slutty see-through thing that Todd bought for her from Fredericks of Hollywood. They had an ad in the back "Let's Go Kill Some Stuff!" magazine.

GregComlish November 6, 2012 at 10:29 am

Robespierre and Obama are mutually fungible

zumpie November 6, 2012 at 10:32 am

Well he IS history's greatest monster and stuff (Bamz, not Robespierre)

Terry November 6, 2012 at 10:30 am

Geeze, even Fox news seems to be getting tired of her. Hannity looks fairly patronizing in that screen capture.

Mumbletypeg November 6, 2012 at 10:32 am

My thoughts exactly. Were I able to play the vid, I'd hope to see the same thing live-action. Maybe someone who's not blocked-access will share / verify his expression of skepticism.

MissusBarry November 6, 2012 at 11:10 am

I sat through this unbearably long clip, in the name of research, for you…they really only only had the side by side when he was talking and took him off camera when she was actually talking. Probably for this very reason. His expression was basically unchanged throughout his camera time.

sbj1964 November 6, 2012 at 10:30 am

Well at least it's the black panthers,and not the Pink Panthers.Those guys are off the chain.

An Asexual Ungulate November 6, 2012 at 10:33 am

You have to have at least _three years_ of jazz tap to join them. They're hardcore. You don't cross them.

actor212 November 6, 2012 at 10:36 am

I dunno, I'm all about their "Dead Ant" platform

Deadant, dead ant, dead ant, deadantdeadantdeadant, dead annnnnnnnnnnnnt, deadant.

Sir_Fartz_Alot November 6, 2012 at 11:13 am

Adam Ant?

ttommyunger November 6, 2012 at 10:30 am

Well, I have to admit, I don't know who ROBESPIERRE is and couldn't spell his name on my own if you held a gun on me, but I know who Palin and Insannity are and what they are; so I've got that going for me, which is nice.

sewollef November 6, 2012 at 11:39 am

Well, I have to admit, I don't know who ROBESPIERRE is…

Yeh, sure you do. His full name is:

Maximilien François Marie Isidore de Robespierre Cheney.

Got it now?

ttommyunger November 6, 2012 at 11:45 am

Kin to Douchbag Asshole Murdering Liar Rumfeld, right?

sewollef November 6, 2012 at 11:52 am

See…. I KNEW you'd remember!

'Course I'm being a bit disingenuous, since Robespierre started out with the right idea [ie. executing the king and all the French aristocracy -- except himself of course].

But he went off the rails a little towards the end…. and that's exactly like Cheney.

NorthStarSpanx November 6, 2012 at 10:30 am

Everyone knows that living well is the best revenge. Doesn't she Fb edict that or Tweet it?

And Sarah's 96 pound body and balding head is such evidence of that.

Schmannnity November 6, 2012 at 10:31 am

The girl does know her French bathrobe designers, you have to give her that.

Mittaplasia November 6, 2012 at 11:05 am

And hers is a custom bathrobe with a secret crack pipe pocket and the label reads, "Roguespierre" because she's special.

Sharkey November 6, 2012 at 10:31 am

Revenge against YOU, Sarah and Sean.

Revenge. against. you.

SigDeFlyinMonky November 6, 2012 at 11:58 am

Revenge for calumny, character assassination and the abasement of the level of political discourse that is the recrudescent excrescence of you and your ilk.

ManchuCandidate November 6, 2012 at 10:31 am

Despite her bitchy irrelevance, I still think that deep down inside that she still really wants to ride Barry like a pony and do things to him that would make her porno doppelganger Lisa Ann blush with shame.

UW8316154 November 6, 2012 at 10:35 am

But don't we all?

Gorillionaire November 6, 2012 at 11:12 am

Yep

CrunchyKnee November 6, 2012 at 10:31 am

Man on man, the slow-witted cuntyness just never stops with this one.

Loch_Nessosaur November 6, 2012 at 10:31 am

Is she having problems keeping her eyes open, or what. She must be coming down from that meth high.

Barbara_ November 6, 2012 at 10:31 am

Shouldn't she be driving her daughters to Lamaze class* or something important right now?

Jus_Wonderin November 6, 2012 at 10:37 am

She was, but saw a dollar bill floating across the highway.

Fare la Volpe November 6, 2012 at 10:38 am

"Class" sounds awful elitist.

widestanceromance November 6, 2012 at 10:38 am

Or at least changing the drip pan under them?

Blueb4sinrise November 6, 2012 at 10:45 am

That's the way to start election day.
Coffee duly snorted onto keyboard.

SnarkOff November 6, 2012 at 10:39 am

Lamaze is for socialists.

zumpie November 6, 2012 at 10:53 am

Yeah, demerol isn't good enough for you fancy pants hippies???

starfanglednut November 6, 2012 at 12:18 pm

Sounds suspiciously French. Here in America, we have "freedom breathing"classes. USA! USA! USA!

MissTaken November 6, 2012 at 11:08 am

Do you still need the baby birthing class after 15 births?

glasspusher November 6, 2012 at 12:12 pm

Now you've got me thinking of that scene from Monty Python's The Meaning of Life, where the baby just falls out while mum(Terry Jones) is doing the dishes.

MUM: Ohh, get that, would you, Deirdre?

SoBeach November 6, 2012 at 10:31 am

This crap has defined the Romney campaign. Take a quote out of context, distort it, and pretend like Obama said something completely different from what he said.

Tens of millions of voters think that's perfectly reasonable.

tihond November 6, 2012 at 10:32 am

This is great news! for Mitch "Napoleon" Daniels!

An Asexual Ungulate November 6, 2012 at 10:32 am

Wait… we can vote to cut heads off now? AWESOME!

weejee November 6, 2012 at 10:32 am

What do these derp thinkers, these poopyheaded pundits like Hannity, Limbaugh, and Beck have in common? No higher ed parchments. Just sayin'.

ManchuCandidate November 6, 2012 at 10:35 am

Sarah has SIX! SIX SKULES ID cards!!

weejee November 6, 2012 at 10:44 am

Which barely got her over the bar to be a teevee sportzcaster.

zumpie November 6, 2012 at 10:54 am

In a market where one of the qualifications was "still breathing"

Schmannnity November 6, 2012 at 10:41 am

But, but, Hannity and Limbaugh are former sportscasters. If you can't take your political advise from a sports talk show, the country is doomed.

Generation[redacted] November 6, 2012 at 10:54 am

KEITH OLBERMAN LIBE——

Wait, what? Oh. Nevermind.

Disassembly November 6, 2012 at 10:33 am

I'm proud to say I voted this morning. Against love of country, apparently.

fuflans November 6, 2012 at 11:39 am

i am sincerely hoping after today you can retire your avatar.

memzilla November 6, 2012 at 10:33 am

Before you vote, dig two graves.

weejee November 6, 2012 at 10:44 am

Only two??!!?!!

Jus_Wonderin November 6, 2012 at 10:33 am

She gives me Erection Intimidation.

glasspusher November 6, 2012 at 12:15 pm

Electile disfunction? Talk to your doctor- or Dr. Biden…

kittensdontlie November 6, 2012 at 10:33 am

If Obama wins, he is going to take our guillotines away!

Blueb4sinrise November 6, 2012 at 10:46 am

….makes note to form NGA- PAC.

actor212 November 6, 2012 at 10:34 am

"Robespierre. He made that gown I wore to the convention, right?"

NellCote71 November 6, 2012 at 12:33 pm

Or that inauguration you didn't get to go to, because you LOST.

ph7 November 6, 2012 at 10:34 am

Obama is just complying with Wonkette comment guidelines. We don't want to send him to Japan like Jack Stueff.

Lazy Media November 6, 2012 at 10:34 am

Hannity themes tomorrow:
1. Voter fraud made the difference
2. Ro-mentum was gonna get 'er dun until the weather (HAARP?) intervened
3. The responsible thing for the House to do is to go off the fiscal cliff AND default on the national debt.
4. Buy gold and ammo.

weejee November 6, 2012 at 10:45 am

5. Buy Wonkette tees and tanks. Lotsa tanks.

zumpie November 6, 2012 at 11:00 am

6. New Black Pantherz!!!! Duh.

7, Also, too, also: Mittens was an evil rhino librul. As were Akin, Mourdock, etc. If we had run TRUE conservatives, we'd have 100% control of everything, all the time. Because all Murika is totes wingnutville, Except those fake parts that aren't

MilwaukeeKent November 6, 2012 at 3:57 pm

8. Only because the lamestream media buried the Benghazi story! We're the only one's who covered it! Just like with Bill Ayers and Rev. Wright!

Tio_Doidinho November 6, 2012 at 10:35 am

Crystal meth is a hell of a drug!

boobookitteh November 6, 2012 at 10:35 am

I'm planning on stabbing people – with votes! – in their bathtubs like Charlotte Corday.

weejee November 6, 2012 at 10:49 am

Even zombie Marat cheers for that!

UW8316154 November 6, 2012 at 10:36 am

Vote for Pedro.

Edit – It just occured to me how much the current election and Napoleon Dynamite have in common: bitchy, establishment white Mormom running against a (possibly illegal) brown, who manages to mobilize the under-class to stand up against bullying, rich snobs.

Barry => Pedro
Mitt => Summer Wheatley

Disassembly November 6, 2012 at 10:36 am

Dude, I tried to watch all of that but it's just not possible.

thatsitfortheother1 November 6, 2012 at 10:36 am

The screen capture says wind gusts up to 55 mph. And that's inside her head.

zumpie November 6, 2012 at 10:36 am

Granny Palin also gave her "surprise" endorsement of Mittens, yesterday—as did Melissa Joan Hart. Add in Stacey Dash's earlier vote and I see Mittens has the coveted has been, D-Lister, attractive after the make up ladies spend 3 hours on them demo totes locked up!

Oh, bonu boints: I'm sure Rick(y) Schroeder will vote R&R, also, too!

Gorillionaire November 6, 2012 at 11:15 am

Melissa Joan Hart is married to one of them "Christian Rock" fellas that never sells any records but seems to have a career anyway.

Biel_ze_Bubba November 6, 2012 at 10:37 am

Um, Sarah … how many books about the French Revolution have you read?

Fare la Volpe November 6, 2012 at 10:39 am

Um, Sarah … how many books about the French Revolution have you read?

Fixed.

prommie November 6, 2012 at 10:43 am

All of them, Katie.

Blueb4sinrise November 6, 2012 at 10:47 am

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AutomaticPilot November 6, 2012 at 5:13 pm

Nice try, GOTCHA MEDIA!!!!!!!!!11!!!!!1111111111111111!!

Magic Sam November 6, 2012 at 10:37 am

Quick, Sarah: Spell "antithesis."

We'll wait.

Come here a minute November 6, 2012 at 10:38 am

Sarah may not know who Robespierre is, but she's pretty sure it has something to do with "Robespierre to pay Paul."

ChillBill November 6, 2012 at 10:42 am

Or she thinks that Robespierre was a French bank robber. I wonder which one of the 5 Community Colleges she went to didn't cover this…

freakishlywrong November 6, 2012 at 10:38 am

Unpossible to watch.

Jus_Wonderin November 6, 2012 at 10:38 am

I think that is only the automatic guillotines. But, yes.

SayItWithWookies November 6, 2012 at 10:39 am

The dog on the porch always barks the loudest.

ph7 November 6, 2012 at 10:40 am

And has the most fleas.

SigDeFlyinMonky November 6, 2012 at 12:03 pm

The dog under the porch always farts the loudest.

Canmon November 6, 2012 at 10:39 am

Talleyrand was a flip-flopper.

Magic Sam November 6, 2012 at 10:39 am

Sarah Palin: "WORRRRRRRRRRD SALLLLLLLLLLLLLAD."

Zango Crudmonger November 6, 2012 at 12:51 pm

of the salmonella variety. Poopyhead is poopy.

Goonemeritus November 6, 2012 at 10:40 am

I read my ballot carefully I didn’t notice Sarah’s name anywhere on it. It occurs to me she might have cynically decided to cash in rather than actually work for her beliefs.

Lucidamente1 November 6, 2012 at 10:41 am

Hannity kind of looks like Danton, if Danton had been a retard.

bearperney November 6, 2012 at 10:41 am

Aux armes, citoyens! (I've been waiting a long time for a chance to say that!)

Joshua Norton November 6, 2012 at 10:42 am

You all realize that it doesn't end here and that if Rmoney loses today the corporate media will immediately go into horse race mode tomorrow driving us all nuts over who the next wingnut candidate for president will be don't you? Well DON'T YOU!!?

Maman November 6, 2012 at 10:42 am

Can we be officially done with her now?

prommie November 6, 2012 at 10:43 am

Robespierre was a duly elected member of the legislature, appointed pursuant to a Bill passed by the legislature to head a special committee to exercise the power of the executive during the crisis. All very regular and proper in procedure and legality. People have no fucking clue what the French Revolution was.

PubOption November 6, 2012 at 12:11 pm

And the Committee for Public Safety was a precursor to the Department for Homeland Security.

fuflans November 6, 2012 at 12:30 pm

like syria: messy and not to be trifled with.

Lucidamente1 November 6, 2012 at 10:43 am

What's the difference between Sarah Palin and Madame Defarge?

Joshua Norton November 6, 2012 at 10:46 am

Lipstick?

PubOption November 6, 2012 at 12:11 pm

Sarah can't knit.

archikvetch November 6, 2012 at 2:43 pm

One, alas, is non-fictional.

Joshua Norton November 6, 2012 at 10:45 am

Up until now Palin thought a Robespierre was something that was available in the sleepwear dept. at Saks.

SexySmurf November 6, 2012 at 10:46 am

What did the Kenyan Usurper do this time? He said “Voting is the best revenge.”

"Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to have your opponent receive one more vote than he would have if you hadn't killed my father."

hagajim November 6, 2012 at 10:47 am

Robespierre? More like Pain in my Derriere.

DemmeFatale November 6, 2012 at 10:47 am

OT:
My daughter who is in NYC, (talk about good timing), just got her absentee CA ballot yesterday!!
The blue state stuff is OK, but the PROPS!!!

BeefHardcake November 6, 2012 at 10:48 am

Don't revenge, reload or something?

gullywompr November 6, 2012 at 10:49 am

Ya know what Sarah? I don't even care about your tits anymore, just GTFO. Stay in Alaska, where the revenge is always cold.

BarackMyWorld November 6, 2012 at 10:53 am

Revenge for what?

Revenge for how you guys have treated the president for the last 4 years, you dumb ass.

Generation[redacted] November 6, 2012 at 10:57 am

Revenge for anonymous rich fucks who tried to buy this election?

Mittaplasia November 6, 2012 at 10:53 am

OT, but Mr. McFatty keeps driving nails into the coffin of Mitten's ill-fated campaign, as noted by a prominent Yahoo political analyst:

68users disliked this comment
Bullballs • 12 hrs agoReport Abuse
Chrietie is a dam fool and stabed Romany in the back he may have cost Romany the predentcy

T3rbo November 6, 2012 at 11:20 am

Spellin be hawrd. Seriously, I had no idea that there was a gypsy problem in New Jersey. Gowd bleesh Guvner Chrietie.

fuflans November 6, 2012 at 12:34 pm

true fact: one of the many times i woke up last night (in a cold sweat worrying about the election), i mumbled to mr. fuflans 'christie's going to take the fall if bamz wins'.

course, that may well be christie's path to the 2016 nomination.

AutomaticPilot November 6, 2012 at 5:17 pm

Wait, I didn't see anyone named Romany on the ballot?

sewollef November 6, 2012 at 11:00 am

Slightly OT, but what the hell…. I love your Cone of Shame avatar

hollywooddood November 6, 2012 at 11:02 am

It's an idiom, you stupid bitch.

BTWBFDIMHO November 6, 2012 at 11:04 am

First time she mentions Robespierre without some turkeys being guillotined in the background. Heireux Action de Grâces, y'all!

neiltheblaze November 6, 2012 at 11:07 am

I think the best revenge against Sarah would be to ignore her.

T3rbo November 6, 2012 at 11:25 am

Revenge? We should buy that haggard twunt a card or flowers every election day. God bless her for stopping McCain's campaign cold and for putting Hillary into Obammy's cabinet

neiltheblaze November 6, 2012 at 11:37 am

Without attention she'd shrivel up and go catatonic.

Gleem McShineys November 6, 2012 at 2:16 pm

For a second I thought you misspelled 'ignite.'

elviouslyqueer November 6, 2012 at 11:07 am

Stupid haggard cunt is haggard.

Guppy November 6, 2012 at 11:09 am

Sarah votes with surveyor's marks.

GregComlish November 6, 2012 at 11:16 am

Knowing that your opponent's husband is still banging that Wasilla hooker is the second best revenge.

Gorillionaire November 6, 2012 at 11:18 am

Hannity has really put some time into training his face to do that on command.

T3rbo November 6, 2012 at 11:21 am

Wasn't Robespierre that black ghostbuster, who always had kind of a bad attitude and would crack wise at inappropriate times? Fuck that guy.

FlipFlopFuck November 6, 2012 at 11:32 am

ZOMG, from the very same fucks who say on an hourly basis, "take our country back!"

fuflans November 6, 2012 at 11:41 am

personally, i would have taken her for a 'marat / sade' type of girl.

but maybe that's just me.

Dildeaux November 6, 2012 at 11:54 am

But when does Lisa Ann get around to banging the midget tranny?

LibrarianX November 6, 2012 at 12:04 pm

Does anyone besides FOX talk to her (including Todd)?

LibrarianX November 6, 2012 at 12:06 pm

To be fair, she could handle Stupid Pet Tricks.

iburl November 6, 2012 at 12:47 pm

Todd can speak?

LibrarianX November 6, 2012 at 12:07 pm

French reference? Palin has gone soft.

La_Cieca November 6, 2012 at 12:12 pm

I must say I like the implication in these screencaps that the Lord has struck Sarah Palin blind.

natoslug November 6, 2012 at 12:22 pm

Now if only he/she/it could strike her dumb as well.

imissopus November 6, 2012 at 12:32 pm

He/She/It already did that, but if the deity could also make her a mute…

natoslug November 7, 2012 at 12:05 pm

I had Pinball Wizard stuck in my head most of yesterday, so all I could think was deaf dumb and blind kid. Well, that, and dumb is one of the first non-expletives that comes to mind when I hear of any Palin other than Michael.

PubOption November 6, 2012 at 12:13 pm

You think that she should be in the asylum?

fuflans November 6, 2012 at 12:35 pm

shouldn't she be?

jcinco November 6, 2012 at 12:33 pm

She appears to be drunk or high as usual. Get back under seany's desk now sarah.

larrykat November 6, 2012 at 12:56 pm

How many times can even the ignorant toothless morons that watch Hannity listen to this harridan say the same shit over and over?

tigernole November 6, 2012 at 2:59 pm

just waiting for her to give out her moose dick stew recipe for the holidays.

Trinket November 6, 2012 at 3:00 pm

Okay, who the hell fed her that name? The same person who told her how to say "I'm a dinner jacket"? Because if that woman knows diddly about the French Revolution, I'll eat my hat.

Schmegeg November 6, 2012 at 3:46 pm

Sarah Palin is just like Fanya Kaplan, except maybe not.

DahBoner November 6, 2012 at 3:57 pm

Tommorow's headline at Fox News:

ROMNEY DEFEATED: "IT'S REVENGE OF THE MOTHERFUCKERS, MOTHERFUCKERS"

Swampay November 6, 2012 at 4:04 pm

That reminds me, can someone remind me of what Romney's response was that time he suggested his supporters refrain from booing Obama? Oh, right. I guess that never happened.

mgardener November 6, 2012 at 5:37 pm

Can't we ban her ?
You know like a horrible lying troll?
Please?
Please?????

malsperanza November 8, 2012 at 9:35 pm

Mind you, not every Fox pundit keeps up with her reading of the minor Renaissance poets, but given Palin's habit of running up massive bills in shopping sprees and charging them to the GOP, I would have expected her to recognize the old adage, "Living well is the best revenge" ~George Herbert (1593-1633). Or failing that, at least that REM song.

Who doesn't love REM?

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