don't revenge! Reload!

Noted Historian Sarah Palin Thinks Barack Obama Is Just Like Robespierre, If She Knew Who Robespierre Was

starburstsFormer half-term GILF and current Facebook celebrity Sarah Palin thinks Barack Obama is a very bad man. What did the Kenyan Usurper do this time? He said “Voting is the best revenge.” As you can imagine, this is the biggest threat the Republic has ever known except for that one time some New Black Panthers held the door to the polling place open for an old white lady.

You know what they always say: first they get their revenge “with votes,” and the next thing you know it is an appointment with Mme. Guillotine. Why does Barack Obama want to cut the heads off all the Republicans, by voting? INPEACH!

About the author

Rebecca is the editor and publisher of Wonkette. She is the author of Commie Girl in the O.C., a collection of her OC Weekly columns, and the former editor of LA CityBeat. Go visit her Commie Girl Collective, and follow her on the Twitter!

View all articles by Rebecca Schoenkopf

Comments

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  • glasspusher

    Remember the Klingon proverb that said: "Voting is a dish that is best served cold"?

    • sbj1964

      It is very cold in space.Kahn.

      • glasspusher

        How very, very…improbable.

    • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

      Really? Because I prefer mine barbecued.

      • glasspusher

        If you go to a Korean restaurant, there's no reason you can't have both.

    • Generation[redacted]

      You can't appreciate Fox News until you hear it in the original Klingon.

      • glasspusher

        Probably the only way they could apply a veneer of honor…

      • Graham Cracker

        So true! Most of what they say looses something in the translation.

  • Cleopatriot

    Who?

    • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

      Her. Again.

      • Cleopatriot

        I refuse to know who that is.

    • DaniloTifoso

      WHEN WILL THIS IRRELEVANT NOBODY DISAPPEAR???

  • Jus_Wonderin

    Damn, Rebecca, you have the blog pedal to the metal!!

    Obligatory: "STFU, Sarah Palin!"

  • BadKitty904

    The shrill sound of failure and the acrid smell of despair…

    • glasspusher

      Shrill and despairing on Fox, crazy in the sack? Sorry, Sarah, you don't do it for me any more…

    • An Asexual Ungulate

      That's what that smell is? I thought it was hot garbage and something that died under the porch a couple weeks ago. Thanks! You saved me some serious crawlspace time.

      • SigDeFlyinMonky

        Smells like burning resistors.

    • Fare la Volpe

      No, that's her Moose~Knuckle parfum

    • BadKitty904

      These folks are whistling past the graveyard and it's becoming obvious that they know it…

    • RomneysLogCabin

      and here I thought that smell was aborted fetuses

  • fishskicanoe

    Let them eat muktuk.

  • Not_So_Much

    Robespierre is that slutty see-through thing that Todd bought for her from Fredericks of Hollywood. They had an ad in the back "Let's Go Kill Some Stuff!" magazine.

  • GregComlish

    Robespierre and Obama are mutually fungible

    • zumpie

      Well he IS history's greatest monster and stuff (Bamz, not Robespierre)

  • Terry

    Geeze, even Fox news seems to be getting tired of her. Hannity looks fairly patronizing in that screen capture.

    • http://facethesuncastnoshadow.wordpress.com/ Mumbletypeg

      My thoughts exactly. Were I able to play the vid, I'd hope to see the same thing live-action. Maybe someone who's not blocked-access will share / verify his expression of skepticism.

      • MissusBarry

        I sat through this unbearably long clip, in the name of research, for you…they really only only had the side by side when he was talking and took him off camera when she was actually talking. Probably for this very reason. His expression was basically unchanged throughout his camera time.

  • sbj1964

    Well at least it's the black panthers,and not the Pink Panthers.Those guys are off the chain.

    • An Asexual Ungulate

      You have to have at least _three years_ of jazz tap to join them. They're hardcore. You don't cross them.

    • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

      I dunno, I'm all about their "Dead Ant" platform

      Deadant, dead ant, dead ant, deadantdeadantdeadant, dead annnnnnnnnnnnnt, deadant.

      • Sir_Fartz_Alot

        Adam Ant?

  • ttommyunger

    Well, I have to admit, I don't know who ROBESPIERRE is and couldn't spell his name on my own if you held a gun on me, but I know who Palin and Insannity are and what they are; so I've got that going for me, which is nice.

    • sewollef

      Well, I have to admit, I don't know who ROBESPIERRE is…

      Yeh, sure you do. His full name is:

      Maximilien François Marie Isidore de Robespierre Cheney.

      Got it now?

      • ttommyunger

        Kin to Douchbag Asshole Murdering Liar Rumfeld, right?

        • sewollef

          See…. I KNEW you'd remember!

          'Course I'm being a bit disingenuous, since Robespierre started out with the right idea [ie. executing the king and all the French aristocracy — except himself of course].

          But he went off the rails a little towards the end…. and that's exactly like Cheney.

  • NorthStarSpanx

    Everyone knows that living well is the best revenge. Doesn't she Fb edict that or Tweet it?

    And Sarah's 96 pound body and balding head is such evidence of that.

  • Schmannnity

    The girl does know her French bathrobe designers, you have to give her that.

    • Mittaplasia

      And hers is a custom bathrobe with a secret crack pipe pocket and the label reads, "Roguespierre" because she's special.

  • http://wonkette.com/ Sharkey

    Revenge against YOU, Sarah and Sean.

    Revenge. against. you.

    • SigDeFlyinMonky

      Revenge for calumny, character assassination and the abasement of the level of political discourse that is the recrudescent excrescence of you and your ilk.

  • http://www.wonkette.com ManchuCandidate

    Despite her bitchy irrelevance, I still think that deep down inside that she still really wants to ride Barry like a pony and do things to him that would make her porno doppelganger Lisa Ann blush with shame.

    • UW8316154

      But don't we all?

    • Gorillionaire

      Yep

  • CrunchyKnee

    Man on man, the slow-witted cuntyness just never stops with this one.

  • Loch_Nessosaur

    Is she having problems keeping her eyes open, or what. She must be coming down from that meth high.

  • Barbara_

    Shouldn't she be driving her daughters to Lamaze class* or something important right now?

    • Jus_Wonderin

      She was, but saw a dollar bill floating across the highway.

    • Fare la Volpe

      "Class" sounds awful elitist.

    • widestanceromance

      Or at least changing the drip pan under them?

      • Blueb4sinrise

        That's the way to start election day.
        Coffee duly snorted onto keyboard.

    • SnarkOff

      Lamaze is for socialists.

      • zumpie

        Yeah, demerol isn't good enough for you fancy pants hippies???

      • http://wonkette.com/ starfanglednut

        Sounds suspiciously French. Here in America, we have "freedom breathing"classes. USA! USA! USA!

    • MissTaken

      Do you still need the baby birthing class after 15 births?

      • glasspusher

        Now you've got me thinking of that scene from Monty Python's The Meaning of Life, where the baby just falls out while mum(Terry Jones) is doing the dishes.

        MUM: Ohh, get that, would you, Deirdre?

  • SoBeach

    This crap has defined the Romney campaign. Take a quote out of context, distort it, and pretend like Obama said something completely different from what he said.

    Tens of millions of voters think that's perfectly reasonable.

  • tihond

    This is great news! for Mitch "Napoleon" Daniels!

  • An Asexual Ungulate

    Wait… we can vote to cut heads off now? AWESOME!

  • http://wonkette.com/ weejee

    What do these derp thinkers, these poopyheaded pundits like Hannity, Limbaugh, and Beck have in common? No higher ed parchments. Just sayin'.

    • http://www.wonkette.com ManchuCandidate

      Sarah has SIX! SIX SKULES ID cards!!

      • http://wonkette.com/ weejee

        Which barely got her over the bar to be a teevee sportzcaster.

        • zumpie

          In a market where one of the qualifications was "still breathing"

    • Schmannnity

      But, but, Hannity and Limbaugh are former sportscasters. If you can't take your political advise from a sports talk show, the country is doomed.

      • Generation[redacted]

        KEITH OLBERMAN LIBE——

        Wait, what? Oh. Nevermind.

  • Disassembly

    I'm proud to say I voted this morning. Against love of country, apparently.

    • http://inappropriatejobpostings.blogspot.com/ fuflans

      i am sincerely hoping after today you can retire your avatar.

  • memzilla

    Before you vote, dig two graves.

    • http://wonkette.com/ weejee

      Only two??!!?!!

  • Jus_Wonderin

    She gives me Erection Intimidation.

    • glasspusher

      Electile disfunction? Talk to your doctor- or Dr. Biden…

  • kittensdontlie

    If Obama wins, he is going to take our guillotines away!

    • Blueb4sinrise

      ….makes note to form NGA- PAC.

  • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

    "Robespierre. He made that gown I wore to the convention, right?"

    • NellCote71

      Or that inauguration you didn't get to go to, because you LOST.

  • ph7

    Obama is just complying with Wonkette comment guidelines. We don't want to send him to Japan like Jack Stueff.

  • Lazy Media

    Hannity themes tomorrow:
    1. Voter fraud made the difference
    2. Ro-mentum was gonna get 'er dun until the weather (HAARP?) intervened
    3. The responsible thing for the House to do is to go off the fiscal cliff AND default on the national debt.
    4. Buy gold and ammo.

    • http://wonkette.com/ weejee

      5. Buy Wonkette tees and tanks. Lotsa tanks.

    • zumpie

      6. New Black Pantherz!!!! Duh.

      7, Also, too, also: Mittens was an evil rhino librul. As were Akin, Mourdock, etc. If we had run TRUE conservatives, we'd have 100% control of everything, all the time. Because all Murika is totes wingnutville, Except those fake parts that aren't

      • http://my.execpc.com/~artkm/rabbit_hole.html MilwaukeeKent

        8. Only because the lamestream media buried the Benghazi story! We're the only one's who covered it! Just like with Bill Ayers and Rev. Wright!

  • Tio_Doidinho

    Crystal meth is a hell of a drug!

  • http://twitter.com/bookofruthless boobookitteh

    I'm planning on stabbing people – with votes! – in their bathtubs like Charlotte Corday.

    • http://wonkette.com/ weejee

      Even zombie Marat cheers for that!

  • UW8316154

    Vote for Pedro.

    Edit – It just occured to me how much the current election and Napoleon Dynamite have in common: bitchy, establishment white Mormom running against a (possibly illegal) brown, who manages to mobilize the under-class to stand up against bullying, rich snobs.

    Barry => Pedro
    Mitt => Summer Wheatley

  • Disassembly

    Dude, I tried to watch all of that but it's just not possible.

  • thatsitfortheother1

    The screen capture says wind gusts up to 55 mph. And that's inside her head.

  • zumpie

    Granny Palin also gave her "surprise" endorsement of Mittens, yesterday—as did Melissa Joan Hart. Add in Stacey Dash's earlier vote and I see Mittens has the coveted has been, D-Lister, attractive after the make up ladies spend 3 hours on them demo totes locked up!

    Oh, bonu boints: I'm sure Rick(y) Schroeder will vote R&R, also, too!

    • Gorillionaire

      Melissa Joan Hart is married to one of them "Christian Rock" fellas that never sells any records but seems to have a career anyway.

  • Biel_ze_Bubba

    Um, Sarah … how many books about the French Revolution have you read?

    • Fare la Volpe

      Um, Sarah … how many books about the French Revolution have you read?

      Fixed.

    • prommie

      All of them, Katie.

    • Blueb4sinrise

      YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    • AutomaticPilot

      Nice try, GOTCHA MEDIA!!!!!!!!!11!!!!!1111111111111111!!

  • http://www.dailydickpunch.com Magic Sam

    Quick, Sarah: Spell "antithesis."

    We'll wait.

  • Come here a minute

    Sarah may not know who Robespierre is, but she's pretty sure it has something to do with "Robespierre to pay Paul."

    • http://www.wonkette.com ChillBill

      Or she thinks that Robespierre was a French bank robber. I wonder which one of the 5 Community Colleges she went to didn't cover this…

  • freakishlywrong

    Unpossible to watch.

  • Jus_Wonderin

    I think that is only the automatic guillotines. But, yes.

  • http://lostintarnation.blogspot.com/ SayItWithWookies

    The dog on the porch always barks the loudest.

    • ph7

      And has the most fleas.

    • SigDeFlyinMonky

      The dog under the porch always farts the loudest.

  • Canmon

    Talleyrand was a flip-flopper.

  • http://www.dailydickpunch.com Magic Sam

    Sarah Palin: "WORRRRRRRRRRD SALLLLLLLLLLLLLAD."

    • Zango Crudmonger

      of the salmonella variety. Poopyhead is poopy.

  • Goonemeritus

    I read my ballot carefully I didn’t notice Sarah’s name anywhere on it. It occurs to me she might have cynically decided to cash in rather than actually work for her beliefs.

  • Lucidamente1

    Hannity kind of looks like Danton, if Danton had been a retard.

  • bearperney

    Aux armes, citoyens! (I've been waiting a long time for a chance to say that!)

  • http://www.notfrisco.com/colmatales/norton/proclaim.html#declaration Joshua Norton

    You all realize that it doesn't end here and that if Rmoney loses today the corporate media will immediately go into horse race mode tomorrow driving us all nuts over who the next wingnut candidate for president will be don't you? Well DON'T YOU!!?

  • http://www.vinoverve.com Maman

    Can we be officially done with her now?

  • prommie

    Robespierre was a duly elected member of the legislature, appointed pursuant to a Bill passed by the legislature to head a special committee to exercise the power of the executive during the crisis. All very regular and proper in procedure and legality. People have no fucking clue what the French Revolution was.

    • PubOption

      And the Committee for Public Safety was a precursor to the Department for Homeland Security.

    • http://inappropriatejobpostings.blogspot.com/ fuflans

      like syria: messy and not to be trifled with.

  • Lucidamente1

    What's the difference between Sarah Palin and Madame Defarge?

    • http://www.notfrisco.com/colmatales/norton/proclaim.html#declaration Joshua Norton

      Lipstick?

    • PubOption

      Sarah can't knit.

    • http://archikvetch.blogspot.com/ archikvetch

      One, alas, is non-fictional.

  • http://www.notfrisco.com/colmatales/norton/proclaim.html#declaration Joshua Norton

    Up until now Palin thought a Robespierre was something that was available in the sleepwear dept. at Saks.

  • SexySmurf

    What did the Kenyan Usurper do this time? He said “Voting is the best revenge.”

    "Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to have your opponent receive one more vote than he would have if you hadn't killed my father."

  • hagajim

    Robespierre? More like Pain in my Derriere.

  • http://Wonkette.com DemmeFatale

    OT:
    My daughter who is in NYC, (talk about good timing), just got her absentee CA ballot yesterday!!
    The blue state stuff is OK, but the PROPS!!!

  • BeefHardcake

    Don't revenge, reload or something?

  • gullywompr

    Ya know what Sarah? I don't even care about your tits anymore, just GTFO. Stay in Alaska, where the revenge is always cold.

  • BarackMyWorld

    Revenge for what?

    Revenge for how you guys have treated the president for the last 4 years, you dumb ass.

    • Generation[redacted]

      Revenge for anonymous rich fucks who tried to buy this election?

  • Mittaplasia

    OT, but Mr. McFatty keeps driving nails into the coffin of Mitten's ill-fated campaign, as noted by a prominent Yahoo political analyst:

    68users disliked this comment
    Bullballs • 12 hrs agoReport Abuse
    Chrietie is a dam fool and stabed Romany in the back he may have cost Romany the predentcy

    • T3rbo

      Spellin be hawrd. Seriously, I had no idea that there was a gypsy problem in New Jersey. Gowd bleesh Guvner Chrietie.

    • http://inappropriatejobpostings.blogspot.com/ fuflans

      true fact: one of the many times i woke up last night (in a cold sweat worrying about the election), i mumbled to mr. fuflans 'christie's going to take the fall if bamz wins'.

      course, that may well be christie's path to the 2016 nomination.

    • AutomaticPilot

      Wait, I didn't see anyone named Romany on the ballot?

  • sewollef

    Slightly OT, but what the hell…. I love your Cone of Shame avatar

  • hollywooddood

    It's an idiom, you stupid bitch.

  • BTWBFDIMHO

    First time she mentions Robespierre without some turkeys being guillotined in the background. Heireux Action de Grâces, y'all!

  • neiltheblaze

    I think the best revenge against Sarah would be to ignore her.

    • T3rbo

      Revenge? We should buy that haggard twunt a card or flowers every election day. God bless her for stopping McCain's campaign cold and for putting Hillary into Obammy's cabinet

      • neiltheblaze

        Without attention she'd shrivel up and go catatonic.

    • Gleem McShineys

      For a second I thought you misspelled 'ignite.'

  • elviouslyqueer

    Stupid haggard cunt is haggard.

  • Guppy

    Sarah votes with surveyor's marks.

  • GregComlish

    Knowing that your opponent's husband is still banging that Wasilla hooker is the second best revenge.

  • Gorillionaire

    Hannity has really put some time into training his face to do that on command.

  • T3rbo

    Wasn't Robespierre that black ghostbuster, who always had kind of a bad attitude and would crack wise at inappropriate times? Fuck that guy.

  • FlipFlopFuck

    ZOMG, from the very same fucks who say on an hourly basis, "take our country back!"

  • http://inappropriatejobpostings.blogspot.com/ fuflans

    personally, i would have taken her for a 'marat / sade' type of girl.

    but maybe that's just me.

  • Dildeaux

    But when does Lisa Ann get around to banging the midget tranny?

  • LibrarianX

    Does anyone besides FOX talk to her (including Todd)?

    • LibrarianX

      To be fair, she could handle Stupid Pet Tricks.

    • http://twitter.com/iburl iburl

      Todd can speak?

  • LibrarianX

    French reference? Palin has gone soft.

  • http://parterre.com La_Cieca

    I must say I like the implication in these screencaps that the Lord has struck Sarah Palin blind.

    • natoslug

      Now if only he/she/it could strike her dumb as well.

      • http://whatisawatthedevolution.blogspot.com imissopus

        He/She/It already did that, but if the deity could also make her a mute…

        • natoslug

          I had Pinball Wizard stuck in my head most of yesterday, so all I could think was deaf dumb and blind kid. Well, that, and dumb is one of the first non-expletives that comes to mind when I hear of any Palin other than Michael.

  • PubOption

    You think that she should be in the asylum?

    • http://inappropriatejobpostings.blogspot.com/ fuflans

      shouldn't she be?

  • jcinco

    She appears to be drunk or high as usual. Get back under seany's desk now sarah.

  • larrykat

    How many times can even the ignorant toothless morons that watch Hannity listen to this harridan say the same shit over and over?

  • tigernole

    just waiting for her to give out her moose dick stew recipe for the holidays.

  • Trinket

    Okay, who the hell fed her that name? The same person who told her how to say "I'm a dinner jacket"? Because if that woman knows diddly about the French Revolution, I'll eat my hat.

  • Schmegeg

    Sarah Palin is just like Fanya Kaplan, except maybe not.

  • DahBoner

    Tommorow's headline at Fox News:

    ROMNEY DEFEATED: "IT'S REVENGE OF THE MOTHERFUCKERS, MOTHERFUCKERS"

  • Swampay

    That reminds me, can someone remind me of what Romney's response was that time he suggested his supporters refrain from booing Obama? Oh, right. I guess that never happened.

  • mgardener

    Can't we ban her ?
    You know like a horrible lying troll?
    Please?
    Please?????

  • malsperanza

    Mind you, not every Fox pundit keeps up with her reading of the minor Renaissance poets, but given Palin's habit of running up massive bills in shopping sprees and charging them to the GOP, I would have expected her to recognize the old adage, "Living well is the best revenge" ~George Herbert (1593-1633). Or failing that, at least that REM song.

    Who doesn't love REM?