at long last sirs have you left no sense of decency?

Despite Best Effort, Geraldo Rivera Unable To Convince Fox & Friends Barack Obama Did Not Personally Murder Amb. Christopher Stevens

Add to Flipboard Magazine.

Well this is very interesting/terrifying/depressing/thrilling/outrageous! (And it’s from Media Matters, obvs, we will just hang out all day on their site, clicking refresh, apparently.) What you have above is Geraldo Rivera being righteously, Jesus-in-the-temple-with-the-moneychangers PISSED about how Fox News is leading Americans “down the primrose path” and “OBSCENELY LYING” regarding Barack Obama pretty much personally giving the Libyan militias orders to kill our ambassador Christopher Stevens. (Interestingly, we also agree with him on his two points regarding on which avenues of inquiry we’d like to get fuller administration answers.) Disregard Geraldo’s self-congratulations on having the wit and insight to have been the one to come up with the name “Benghazigate,” and let yourself drift until he starts yelling. Because YELL HE DOES.

It is especially thrilling and hilarious watching ol’ Gerry Rivers denounce and grandly inveigh against the disinformation coming from Fox News’s lieholes while still being in control of himself enough to refrain from actually mentioning Fox News. Hey, a man’s gotta do what a man’s gotta do.

We expect Shep Smith to answer the sound with his own fury at any moment.


About the author

Rebecca is the editor and publisher of Wonkette. She is the author of Commie Girl in the O.C., a collection of her OC Weekly columns, and the former editor of LA CityBeat. Go visit her Commie Girl Collective, and follow her on the Twitter!

View all articles by Rebecca Schoenkopf


Hey there, Wonkeputians! Shypixel here to remind you to remember our Commenting Rules For Radicals, Enjoy!

  • memzilla

    This comment has been wrapped up in tinfoil by the administrator and placed way back on the bottom shelf of the refrigerator where it will fester and molder for three months and turn green and from which, if struck by a stray electrical spark, life will emerge, kinda like the Watson-Crick "Primordial Soup" experiment you read about in 8th grade biology and forgot about until just now.

    • Loch_Nessosaur


    • SmutBoffin

      This comment intentionally left blank.

      • SmutBoffin

        This comment makes its own sauce.

        • SmutBoffin

          This comment is a lie.

          • SmutBoffin

            This comment wonders 'who was that stooped and mealy-colored old man who I used to call Poppa when the merry-go-round broke down?'.

          • SmutBoffin

            This comment laughs at danger and breaks all the rules.

          • actor212

            This comments depends on the kindness of strangers

          • SmutBoffin

            This comment is not allowed within a hundred yards of any TGI Fridays by judicial order.

          • actor212

            This comment put the Bomp in the Bomp Shoo Bomp Shoo Bomp

          • PsycWench

            This comment is deeply flawed and likes it that way

          • GhostBuggy

            This comment is a shy lil' possum.

          • Doktor Zoom

            Ceci n'est pas un comment

          • Blueb4sinrise

            this comment was found in a vault

          • elviouslyqueer

            Comment ça va?

          • Chet Kincaid_

            La meilleur!

          • bikerlaureate

            The previous comment is true.

        • actor212

          This comment just kicked your comment's ass

          • PsycWench

            This comment picked up both of your comments by their scrawny little comments' necks and tossed them out the door of the dive bar
            *with votes.

    • Mittaplasia

      You've started Commentgate!

      • actor212

        Today, we're all Commentists

        • LesBontemps

          Not me, I'm a Commentard.

      • horsedreamer_1

        I prefer Commentghazi.

    • SmutBoffin

      I think it was Harold Urey and not Watson/Crick, BTW.

      • actor212


        • bobbert

          Damn you both

    • natl_[redacted]_cmdr

      This comment has been [REDACTED]

      (Yes, I believe in recycling. What?)

  • Loch_Nessosaur

    Ffs, why won't people understand that Benghazigate is worse than Watergate. And the world is going to end in a few days.

  • neiltheblaze

    You know you've gone seriously around the bend when Geraldo Rivera is the voice of reason.

    • MacRaith

      I was saying the same thing about Chris Christie yesterday. We are way, way down the rabbit hole, folks.

  • nounverb911

    Is Gerry still giving away our troops positions to the enemy?

    • Serolf_Divad

      The enemy is us.

  • Ryy

    Hopefully Geraldo hoofs it to Libya post-haste to investigate, where his crew will promptly shoot at him (as happened in Afghanistan), this time hopefully putting him out of his misery. With votes.

  • TxSpinyLizrd

    No, I refuse. I will be a better person if I do not spend a portion of my life, however small, watching this.

    • Andrew Drinker


      • BadKitty904

        Life is too short for that, esp. on a sunny Fall Friday.

        'Sides, those people make me sleepy.

        • LesBontemps

          I think the idea is to watch Gretchen Carlson cross and uncross her legs.

  • Disassembly

    Finally, a credible voice for the left.

  • gullywompr

    Huh, same thing that was inside Al Capone's vault. Waddaya know…

  • bureaucrap

    Perhaps he's auditioning for Ed Schultz's spot on MSNBC as "House Windbag".

    • Chet Kincaid_

      Lay off Ed, his show is 10 times better than the stale smugfest Olbermann was reduced to at the end.

  • Trannysurprise

    I hope Geraldo's yacht damage isn't too severe. The horror!!!!

  • Tommmcatt_Again

    Geraldo: Border Guard at the gates of Wingnuttia.

  • DrunkIrishman

    Man, when even Geraldo smacks you down, you know you've lost the argument. Good on The Stache.

    Just for fun this morning, when the new jobs numbers were released, I wanted to get FOX's take on it. So, I flipped on over … only to see a flaming embassy and COVER UP splashed across the screen. In FOX's world, the economy is not improving, there was never a hurricane and Benghazi is like happening over and over again every day of the week … like some god-awful Groundhog Day hell.

  • noodlesalad

    When Geraldo is right, something is wrong.

    I'm hoping this is the event horizon that Fox News has now passed, and (after Obama's re-election) it will eventually be compacted into an ever-smaller ball of hatred until all we're left with is Bill O'Reilly's outraged, blinking eyeball.

    • calliecallie

      I can see it with my waking eyes!

    • Blueb4sinrise

      that's not an eyeball.

      • Gleem McShineys

        Gross! Why is it blinking?!

        • Blueb4sinrise

          Too much felafel?

    • Chet Kincaid_

      Small enough to drown in an Inaugural Champagne Flute.

    • deanbooth

      Fox will have a revival during the inpeachment hearings.

  • BadKitty904

    A sad, tedious has-been and too boring to comment on.

    OT: Say, whatever happen to that Ryan guy? You know, "Little Paulie"…

    • nounverb911

      He went to San Antonio and forgot the Alamo?

    • SorosBot

      He's got more clean dishes to wash.

    • TootsStansbury

      They keep him chained to a radiator in the basement these days.

    • neiltheblaze

      HA HA – and he was supposed to lend "credibility" to the Romney campaign. Wonderful.

  • Doktor Zoom

    "You are a politician!"

    Or maybe an errand boy, sent by grocery clerks, to collect a bill.

    • Both Sides Do It

      Sometimes Geraldo goes too far . . . he's the first to admit it

    • C_R_Eature

      The Horrendo. The Horrendo.

      • natl_[redacted]_cmdr

        The Return of the C_R_Eature!

        You live!

        • C_R_Eature

          I do, thanks. Poseidon has been out to get me for a long time, so I've tried to make myself a Hard Target. Failing that, a Fast one.

          I was very lucky. However, a lot of the people I know were not so lucky and almost all of the places I knew and loved growing up, Poseidon did finally come to get.

          Summer, Geography and Life will never be the same. Ever.

          • natl_[redacted]_cmdr

            Summer, Geography and Life go on. No, maybe they will never be the same. Neither will you. Luckily, I have never gone through such a traumatic experience as a hurricane destroying everything I've known. But with each tragedy I experience, looking back, I realize I have come through, somehow, stronger. And you will too.

            Be strong. Be patient. Be resilient.

            This storm has destroyed so much. But it will never destroy your spirit, or the spirits of your friends and neighbors. Ever.

            And besides, this country will never stop producing Repug asshats for us to snark on. And if we Wonketteers do nothing but make you laugh once in a while, well, that's not nothing.

            Here's a line from Cat Power's song "Nothin' But Time": "You got nothin' but time, and it ain't got nothin' on you."

            And Poseidon ain't got nothin' on you.

            I wish I knew what else to say. Be well, my friend. Take care.

          • C_R_Eature

            Thank you, that's all sound advice. I will need to mourn my shredded past for a bit, then get up & go on. It's what I do…

            Life Goes On, even though it has to go through a Stormy Sky.

          • natl_[redacted]_cmdr

            "If you don't know it, learn it."

            "Such a stormy sky, never seen it like this before"

            "The waves hit the shore/ the people recover and come back for more."

            That's the fuck I'm talking about! Hell, you got this kid. Mourn a bit. [Nothing and no one could ever take those memories away from you.]

            And then? Well? Right back to work.

            Too much respect to relate.

    • GemlikeFlame

      It just occurred to me that Geraldo and Ann Coulter have far too much in common, short of a few piddling doctrinal differences, of course. The Y chromosome and adam's apple, for instance…

  • nounverb911

    When did they let Geraldo out of Willowbrook?

    • actor212

      Last actual good reporting he did

  • iburl

    Hmm, I seem to remember another incident where Americans were killed by terrorists and serious questions were asked, but back then, the people asking those questions were demonized by Fox News…. hmmm, what was that… oh yeah, 9/11.

    • widestanceromance

      YOU GO TO HELL, HE KEPT US SAFE!11!111!!

  • actor212

    And there, right there, we see the metamorphosis of Geraldo Rivera into Jerry Rivers, old man with a lawn

  • Oblios_Cap

    Benghazigate does have a nice ring to it.

    • LesBontemps

      I put up a Benghazigate at the entrance to my garden. It's lovely with the wisteria growing over it.

    • MissTaken

      You know what really has a nice ring to it: Fox & Friends Cancelled.

    • Nostrildamus

      And it clearly rules them all.

  • Tequila Mockingbird

    Chris Christie sittin' in a tree with Obama!
    Geraldo Rivera p3wning El Doocey!
    Cats and dogs living together!

    • natl_[redacted]_cmdr

      The sun will rise in the west! Clocks will run counter-clockwise!

    • neiltheblaze

      Chris Christie sitting in a tree. Now THAT I'd like to see.

  • Beowoof

    First Ben Stein, now Geraldo pointing out that Fox is full of shit. I have known that since I first watched O'Reilly.

    • Andrew Drinker

      The serious mindfuck happens on that rare occasion when even O'Reilly says something critical of the right wing.

  • Detesticle

    OT, when Obama wins on Tuesday, it will be the 5th out of the last 6 prez elections where the Dem won the popular vote. Maybe it will be time for Republicans to reevaluate their stances against women, gays, Hispanics, health care, climate change, sensible economic and foreign policy … or they can remain (as Maher calls them) the mental-patient party forever. It's really their call.

    • SorosBot

      Nope, they will have lost because Romney wasn't right-wing, a real conservative would certainly have beaten the scary black man! That will quickly become the narrative, because conservatism can never fail, it can only be failed.

      • Goonemeritus

        I know your right and the partisan part of me is actually glad you’re right but the tiny bit of my remaining soul that just wants a healthy country is praying you’re wrong.

    • widestanceromance

      Don't reevaluate–reload.

    • emmelemm


    • Gleem McShineys

      For Republicans, introspection has always been their strong point.

      Or was it blame-shifting-finger-pointing-scapegoatery? Same difference I guess.

  • Barbara_

    I watched the video and I appreciate that Geraldo spoke up. Should that blonde cocktail waitress in the blue dress be sitting with the men folk though?

    • Oblios_Cap

      Don't worry your pretty head none. She's just there as eye candy.

      • Disassembly

        Or mustache fluffer.

      • widestanceromance

        I thought she was there because her sister was hot and easy.

    • widestanceromance

      She's been certified menses-free, so it's OK. . .for now.

  • Callyson

    I love the sound of FOX News' talking heads infighting…sounds like victory…

    • e_z

      but it still smells like bullshit.

    • CindynEncinitas

      They'll be eating each other on Wednesday.

  • SorosBot

    There have been a fuckton of stories about Fox anchors being even crazier than usual today. Are they all losing their minds (well, losing them even more) from the knowledge that the black liberal will almost certainly be re-elected in a few days?

    • BadKitty904

      Just wait 'til Monday.

      As mentioned earlier, the wingnuts are beginning to implode as the Day of Reckoning approaches. Hence, the wailing and gnashing of teeth…

  • Lionel[redacted]Esq

    But, come on, everyone knows that Ambassador Stevens was about to out Obama and his big Gay Orgies. Why do you think no one can figure out where Joe Biden was that day.

    Source: FOX News.

  • PhilippePetain

    Somebody's getting a little anxious that maybe the wingnut Fox viewership is dying off, hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm????!!1!?

  • imissopus

    I can almost hear Roger Ailes off-camera yelling "Cut his mike! Cut his mike!"

  • Andrew Drinker

    Oh, I thought this was the one where he yells at me to not wear a hoodie or else Al Capone will shoot me.

  • Serolf_Divad

    Come on guys, Geraldo named it Bengazigate… maybe you didn't hear me the first time: GERALDO NAMED IT BENGAZIGATE!

    • Chet Kincaid_

      Imagine how fucking annoying Geraldo was when he learned the alphabet at 13.

  • Lot_49

    Whenever somebody begins a statement by saying, "There are three points I want to make…" my eyes glaze over.

  • mavenmaven

    What is a 'primrose path' and why is everyone leading people down it against their will?

  • RomneysLogCabin

    Jerry! Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!

    Today's Episode: I'm addicted to black mustache rides!

  • Disassembly

    My favorite part is the end where Doocy paternally pats Geraldo: "I know, sport. It is frustrating, but the deal was no bike unless your grades came up. You'll just have to try harder next semester."

  • calliecallie

    "I didn't come to argue."

    Famous last words.

  • bobster1985

    The frustration mentioned by Doocey is frustration that this whole issue isn't hurting Obama in the election.

    • BadKitty904

      …the frustration of a talking head when no one is listening to it…

    • bikerlaureate

      …the frustration of his very last hope of credibility or influence swirling inexorably down the drain…

  • TootsStansbury

    AAAAAHHHH!!! Wonkette, can't you put up a post about how the Bamz is full of teh awesomes? With ponies. Yeah ponies would be a nice touch.

    I am afraid I might have to drown myself in a bathtub if this keeps up.

    • actor212

      Fill your tub with gin. It's more fun this way

    • emmelemm


    • BadKitty904

      And some kitties!

      • Oblios_Cap

        Bronco Bamma 2012!

        • Chet Kincaid_

          The Rootin-est, Tootin-est Prezdent in the whole durn West!!

          • natl_[redacted]_cmdr

            That's all kinds of awesome.

          • TootsStansbury

            Thanks! I know this is highly disrespectful of the office but *drool*.

    • Trinket

      No. No more ponies, please.

    • CindynEncinitas

      If I didn't have Nate's FiveThrtyEight to talk me down every day I would have jumped off the Coronado Bridge by now!

  • smokefilledroommate

    I like how Geraldo feels the need to (realquick) explain the origin of the 'gate' suffix.

    • natl_[redacted]_cmdr

      Everyone knows it started with WhiteWatergate.

  • elviouslyqueer

    Meh. Needs at least one thrown chair, Gretchen's hair ripped out by the roots, and Steve Doocey's ballsack being repeatedly ravaged by Geraldo's fist.

    • BadKitty904

      Like I said, wait 'til Monday. They'll be fondling snakes and speaking in tongues by then…

      • Jus_Wonderin

        I just might tune in, then.

  • Jus_Wonderin

    Is it possible for Geraldo to be a parody of the parody of the parody of himself that he is?

    • BoatOfVelociraptors

      Somebody took the red pill.

  • Jerri

    What next? Will dogs lay down with cats?!! Everybody's coming unhinged! It's madness!

  • mavenmaven
  • VeraSevera

    Remember the Fuller brush man? I'm that old and whenever I see that mustache I think…omg…the Fuller brush man is here and he just fell into his case of samples….

  • AznMom420

    Detroit has been infiltrated by Islamists I wonder if Douchey can trust them enough to keep tonguing Mitt Romney's jobhole?

  • CindynEncinitas

    I kept waiting for Pee Wee Herman to clock him with a chair…

    • LagunaB

      You wouldn't want to stop bridge traffic. So maybe just stand on the edge of a crumping cliff in Solana. Do you know Paula Tipton?

  • larrykat

    Hold on everyone! Gretchen is unilaterally separating our military from our state department!

  • JackObin

    I understand this country is full of blithering idiots and they require an outlet like Fox News. But how did they end up in NYC? Shouldn't they be headquarrered in Dallas, or some other alien, asshole environment?

  • malsperanza

    Christ, these people have been pouring over the details of this thing like they're the Warren Commission. I bet they've been shooting bullets into blocks of gelatin and everything. Do they have any inkling that the rest of the country doesn't give a rat's ass about it?

  • jzgplj

    Gerry, go back to that empty Al Capone vault, I think maybe you left whatever remnant of a soul you might have had there.

  • slowhansolo

    I bet Geraldo's pretty fun to get loaded.

  • dennis1943

    When Obama wins………..the sound of exploding heads will fill the air….waves,courtesy of Faux news………………

  • ttommyunger

    Looks to me like Gerald is covering his bets, a la Gov Christie.