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Can't you see he's in miseryHai East Coast, what’s new? Sorry about your DEATH CRANE! We are just chilling here in sunny Californy watching old videos of Mitt Romney accepting his nomination. We were there! It was so great! We went from really really intensely disliking the man to a full-on hatred by the time he was done smirking, lying, mocking Jimmy Carter, smirking more, bearing false witness, making fun of Barack Obama for wanting to do something about global warming, and smirking. Oh wait, what was that second to last one? Yeah, making fun of Barack Obama for wanting to do something about global warming.

Oh yeah. There it is. Look at that disdain! That is the disdain Mitt Romney feels for you, personally and individually, because according to his RNC acceptance speech, we are only supposed to care about our families and not anybody else, and last time we looked, you were not in Mitt Romney’s family, or you would not be in these circumstances right now! Hope it helps to warm your frigid toes after your power goes out for however many weeks and you get your Day After blizzard that eated the world.

Good luck Wonkers. We love you.

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