And (no surprise), it’s alleged vote frauder Meat Loaf! Let us relive the glory days of Ol’ Miffed Romney’s beauteous version for Olds, after the jump.
Well, that was terrible. You’re welcome.
AMERCIA BY THE DASHBOARD LIGHTS 1:21 pm October 27, 2012
Mitt Romney Finds Man Who Can Sing ‘America The Beautiful’ Worse Than He Can
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{ 245 comments }
It's sad to think that no one would even think about voting for this guy if he were on American Idol. He's tone deaf to compassion and thoughtfulness as he is music.
True, but he was awesome in Rocky Horror Picture Show. Meatloaf is getting old.
Yeah, he used to be an awesome tenor.
Oddly enough, Meatloaf and Pavarotti together: http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x6sz11_meat-loaf…
Wow!Who knew?I love how it was just old hat for a pro like Pav.(Mr. Loaf probably had to wear a diaper.)
Once upon a time, the N.Y. Times referred to him as "Mr. Loaf".
Well, people would vote for him in a William Hung kinda way.
It's sad to think that a man who owes his career to musical theater is endorsing Mittens.
"God sheds his grace on thee…" Rape babies?
Hell, no. God only sheds grace on a fertilized egg to zygote to fetus. Once it's an actual baby? Bootstraps, kid. And as to your mother: tell that bitch that if she doesn't want another rape baby, she shouldn't wear slutty clothes.
I think we can let Howard Dean off the hook now, too.
I never understood the overreaction on that one.
Especially since if one of the other party had yelled, it would have been seen as evidence that they were a kickass guy who stands up to terra, or some such shit.
Especially since it was later found that the media exaggerated the sound-level of the scream.
Think Meat Loaf needs to go back in the oven.
Half-baked libel!
He was always kind of a 'special' talent.
Make sure the pilot light is lit. The gas was not good for him.
Paradise by the Pilot Light?
That's when rock 'n roll libel comes through!
Wait, Meat Loaf is a Jew?
Let's do the Time Warp again!
OK. Now, let's see Rmoney do a cover of "Hot Patootie"…
Mmmmm. Then afterwards what's for dinner?
That's a rather tender subject. Another slice, anyone?
Mitt told Meatloaf that he was a huge fan of his "Bat Out of Heck" album.
Stick a fork in it.
See what happens when Dr. Frank N Furter isn't around with his ice ax?
What's for dinner??
Well babies, don't you panic.
Or his chain saw.
A greaser from the freezer! A bat out of hell!
Mitt Romney just cold bringing the star power now, y'all.
Haydn and Prince Esterhazy. Mozart and Emperor Joseph II. Thus arise sweet airs when a musical prodigy and an enlightened despot collide.
sir elton and princess di.
Sir Elton and Rush.
Oh fuck no. Not Rush & Sir Elton.
[stops, thinks]
Oh you mean the bloated gasbag, not the crummy Canadian musical aggregation. That's OK, then.
Springsteen and Obama.
Leonard Bernstein and Jacqueline Kennedy
Reagan and Mellencamp? Oh, wait.
Remember when Frank N. Furter killed him with an axe at the end of his song in "The Rocky Horror Picture Show"? Good times.
Romney needed ML to sing for him since he's a little horse.
Refalca Libel!
My Little Pony libel.
Vote for Mittz – But I won't do that.
Hot patootie, bless my soul, he sucks!
What exactly do these people think is the benefit of supporting romney?
Getting a white back in the White House?
Perzackly. They're not voting for Mittz, they're voting to oust O.
Literally, *anyone* (as their choice of Rmoney makes clear) before the "blah"…
But didn't George Clinton tell us to turn the White House black? And to make this one nation under a groove???
According to Meat Loaf, noted political expert, you must choose Mitt because he knows, unlike that dummy Obama, that the Cold War isn't over, dangnumbit. Not over! Also, Meat Loaf is still in Billboard Top Ten. And he's going to show up to vote on the wrong… year.
I lived through the Cold War. I knew the Cold War. This, sir, is no Cold War.
Because they can't stand the thought of a black dude having more power than they do.
What if he isn't a black dude but instead is a cool cat, daddy-o?
Yeah, as if "cool" impresses them. They put up Daddy Bush, Shrub, Bob Dole and John McCain, for goodness sake.
Uh, that was supposed to be a joke about the use of the ever so trendy term "dude" to refer to a grown man. Sorry, snark fail.
They're very, very rich and I'd bet my life they cheat on their taxes to the fullest extent of their accountants' abilities. Meatloaf, Kid Rock, Ted Nugent, Trace Adkins, Johnny Van Zandt probably also have accounts in the Cayman Islands.
I can't look at Meatloaf anymore without thinking "bitch tits."
That's also what I think when I look at Mitt.
His name was Robert Paulsen.
Now more than ever.
You'd think these old hasbeens would just be content to leave their careers be, and not get rid of half of their remaining fans by going full retard, but what do I know.
Are you sure he was singing? It looks and sounds like a cerebral accident.
The meat in Meat Loaf is obviously pork, since he was squealing like a castrated pig.
I remember the very first time I saw Meatloaf on TV before I knew who he was. I just thought it was awfully nice of those TV people to give the, er, mentally challenged an opportunity.
Paralyzed by the dashboard lights?
I have been dying to work that into a pun somehow, because for the life of me I can't think of any other meatloaf hits…
Well, there is Bat out of Heck.
Two out of three ain't bad.
Holy mother of God. Mittens looks like he's about to shove his fist down Meatloaf's throat and rip out his larynx. Too bad he didn't. It would have meant a ten point bump in the polls.
Not that I would have voted for but I sure would respect him more.
Well I can see a parasite by the dashboard lights.
Who?
Who? Who? Meatloaf, that's fucking who. O.K., he has fallen, he has gotten old, he sucks now, but nobody in the entire history of Rock and Roll and all other music combined has ever rocked harder than Meatloaf rocked in his prime.
This is tragedy, not comedy.
Here's your antidote, bitches: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y6uHR90Sq6k
Every time I see this, I just go "Aww!", and want to hug Obama.
What a little sweetheart he is.
hoo boy i needed that.
i am making calls to iowa and (even though i'm using my best sweet blond girl voice when praising bamz), farmer's keep hanging up on me.
You are so awesome!
Those farmers must be a little tired of political calls, but if you 'get through' to even one or two voters, that may have a ripple effect.
Oh my god I just got pregnant!
Jesus Christ, I made the mistake of listening to that and now my dogs won't stop barking. I better get them a treat to make up for this crap…
Awww…
When a dog barks at meatloaf you know it's bad.
Was it the singing or all the dog whistles?
I don't know–they aren't talking to me right now, despite getting a treat. Can't say I blame them. Maybe if I get that video of Obama singing “Let's Stay Together” they'll forgive me, BBL…
Somebody say treats???????
"I'm…. so not in love with you," Mittens.
I thought Meatloaf was the intellectual property of Chris Christie.
Hmmm. Now, that you mention it, I've never seen the two of them in the same room, at the same time…
What room would be large enough?
They were best buds until it got down to the last donut in the box…
I did, too, as I'm pretty sure it's his stripper name…
Jesus, what a cretin-fest.
Cretin-palooza?
There's no stopping the cretins from hopping.
which America is he singing about?
The one where the militarized police are here to help and protect you.
Circa 1957.
Why, "Real" America, of course. Either that, or Amercia.
Kid Rock, Dave Mustaine, Ted Nugent, Meatloaf….I sense a pattern developing….
I am beginning to think that bad taste in music = bad politics…
But the conservatards get all butt-hurt when Lena Dunham makes a cute little double entendre about voting for the first time, right?
Because Ms Dunham was alluding to a young woman making a choice about her sex life. Repubicans HATE HATE HATE that women have sex without prior government authorization.
And Obamz has James Taylor in New Hampshire today.
He was great. Played about seven songs, all the ones you'd expect, "Fire and Rain," Gone to Carolina, You've Got a Friend, Shower the People, etc., etc. Wife with him, singing on most songs (and apparently kids, pre-teenish, non-singing). Then Bamz! Who thoroughly kicked ass before a crowd of 8500 far-more-diverse-than-you'd-expect-in-NH-from-all-the-Romney-crowd-pics people on a beautiful 70-ish sunny fall New Hampshire day, 48 hours before we get buried beneath 36 inches of rain and snow and last-minute SuperPAC hate and hope flyers.
Yeah, life is good. But Winter Is Coming.
Embittered no-talent old-fart rockers trying to be relevant?
…sings what?
Mitt Romney will do anything for votes…but he won't do that.
I'm kidding; there's nothing Mittens won't do for votes.
It's fun to watch him squirm, isn't it?
Remember when the baggers were all cock sure that they'd beat Barry solely on the issues, because silent majority and they're ideas are exactly what the founding fathers would've come up with?
Nice thing about meatloaf is it can be shaped into most any form. Even the shape of a turkey.
After this it's safe to say Mitt has the falling down drunk has-been vote sewn up.
Luckily, they won't show up to vote until after Thanksgiving.
I'm pretty sure the only time people hear Meatloaf songs these days are when drunk guys put it in the jukebox, usually by mistake.
Nope, I ain't votin' fer'im.
America the Beutiful is not Mittens song,but you should hear him belt out Elton Johns 'The bitch is back'.Brought a tear to me eye.
Isn't it time for Romney to have his SC surrogate, Nikki Haley campaigning with him around the country?
He can tell folks she'll be his Cybersecurity advisor… http://www.thestate.com/2012/10/26/2496396/south-…
My nine-year-old son loves to play the Mitt Romney "Where's Waldo" game. Every time Mitt draws a crowd, my boy tries to find the one non-whitey in the crowd.
This one has him stumped.
What's the matter Mitt? Do the people you represent make you uncomfortable?
That's been obvious since Day One of his campaign, hasn't it?
Mitt's coy contempt for ordinary white Americans is appalling–I'd hate to see what he would have in store for minorities as the President.
Well now I'm prayin' for the end of time
To hurry up and arrive
Cause if I've got to spend another minute with Mitt
I don't think that I can really survive
So less see, Willard is Brad, Egg is Janet, Meat Loaf is obvs Eddie, but who is Dr. Frank-N-Furter, the sweet tranzzzvestite?
Ann Coulter, natch. (though she looks more like Riff Raff)
And hunky Paul Ryan is Rocky! Krauthammer gets to be Dr Scott by default, with Pegs Noonington and KJ Lopez as Magenta and Columbia.
OK, even I can't stomach that last part.
Who's Riff Raff?
Oh, yea. When I mentioned him with Coulter, I forgot to cast him. Doocy?
Riff Raff only wrote the thing!
Um…yes, I have seen it a few times.
Lindsey Graham?
"Do you know this earthling… er-uh, person?"
That's Mitt's line if I ever heard it.
"We are about to beam the White House back to the planet of Kobol in the galaxy of Whitepeopleonly."
Oh no, we are SO taking it over to Planet Transsexual!
In light of his flip flops and the lack of accountability for them, Mitt should sing Nessun Dorma.
I think his song is actually "Non, je ne regrette rien".
Easier to now think of Meatloaf as SPAM.
Wait, so Mr. Loaf may be trying to vote fraudulently? This means that something MUST be done: Better find some old black ladies who can be prevented from voting.
"I was told there would be food."
"Thank you for your Endorsement, Meat. Mr. Sununu has your Ham Sandwich and cab fare as promised."
I am Jack's bloated washed-up has been.
Only In America
-Harry Golden
Is Meatloaf supposed to be having a seizure?
Yes; he is supposed to be having a seizure and collapsing, therefore rendering him unable to sing.
Well, that would be helpful, certainly.
I imagine that dogs everywhere hate him. Passionately.
Never in my life have I seen clearer evidence of the failure of the War on Drugs.
Actually, Meat has undergone quite a bit of physical and emotional trauma, which is the only way I can explain this. Doesn't excuse the unrepentant Republican polishing he's doing, though.
I think the most important thing that can be taken away from this endorsement is that Meatloaf is alive.
This is good news for the writers of VH1's, "Where Are They Now?" show!
Ok, this is what I was waiting for. I think I've made my decision.
I guess Mitt figures if he surrounds himself with horrible people he will seem less horrible by comparison.
OK, the fellow in the blue jacket (no idea who he is) is more than a bit of a drama queen, but he does have a fairly decent voice, and can at least carry the tune, although he does sound a bit pinky-up-the-ass when he's straining for the high notes.
But Meatloaf? That can only be deliberate self-parody, right?
On the plus side, we do get to see Mitt looking cringingly uncomfortable (more so than usual).
Who are ANY of the others? What's with the guy in the top hat? And isn't that one guy kinda, um, brownish?
I think one or more of them are from the band Alabama.
Of course
The Loaf's days with Glee may be numbered…
Is this a public exorcism?
Assume Meatloaf mangled.
[the song w/ votes]
Speaking of relieving the cause, but not the symptom.
At least now, no one is waiting with antici-
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pation.
Ain't enough ketchup in the world to make that Meatloaf palatable.
Meatloaf still gets to do things? I thought we had gotten rid of him.
DAYUM!
He got the Loaf!
Pop quiz:
What will Meat Loaf do for love?
a) Anything
b) That
c) Destroy the entire human race with his singing.
Eat?
OT: Obama's ground game, at least here in Dayton, Ohio, is clearly ahead of Romney's. Not only do I actually see Obama people around and doing things, but they actually called me and asked if I wanted to volunteer. They said they'd call back and tell me things that need to be done. I'm just kind of confused on how they got my name, considering I'm not a registered Democrat and this is the first general election I've been old enough to vote in…
I'm saying no if it has anything to do with me going to West Dayton though, that area just plain scares me considering it typically leads the news with "shooting in West Dayton". We shall see.
If the OFA folks in OH are anything like they are in NH, you'll have plenty of choices. I *sniff* love those guys. Sorry I have to head home to my tragically red state (home of John Rich, to sort of steer this back on topic).
To be fair, Romney supporters are too damned scared to set foot within the city limits of Dayton.
Two out of three ain't bad?
I get a kick out of all these bullshit Republicans warbling the words to "America the Beautiful." Wonder if they know anything about the woman who wrote those words? Katharine Lee Bates was a prof at Wellesley College and most likely was a lesbian who was committed to one life-long relationship.
Bates' originally had these lines as part of the third stanza:
America! America!
God shed his grace on thee
Till selfish gain no longer stain
The banner of the free!
Marian Anderson, a blah woman, sang it on the steps of the Lincoln Memorial when the upstanding, patriotic racist women of the DAR refused to let her rent their Constitution Hall for a concert.
Sing away, you skangy bastards. And crown thy hypocrisy with a shit sandwich.
History is as meaningless as facts to today's Republicans. I notice they do know enough not to sing This Land Is Your Land, but probably because they think Pete Seeger wrote it.
Mittens has the voice of an ANGEL ! OK, it's the Angel of Death,but he likes to stick with his Bane theme,as Charon the Boatman who shuttles companies across the waters to the land of the dead.China.
He briefly joined the Heck's Angels when he was in college. They liked to heckle the anti-war protestors and 'offer' free haircuts to the hippies…
I want Mittens to sing "She Bangs"
every time mittens pulls out a 'celebrity' i'm reminded that when you lie down with dogs you get up with fleas.
Oh no, did he get the Alan Parsons Project too?!?
CANINE LIBEL!
Also, when you lie down with Paul Ryan, you get up with fleas.
Hell, fleas if you're lucky.
Mitt outsourced his singing with as much success as he outsourced his foreign policy.
Meatloaf thinks Mitt will appoint him Secretary of Rockin' Out. So sad.
Mitt is already rolling back noise pollution regulations. Now I have to gouge my ears out.
was that popcorn popping in the background or the sound of someone's very last nerve frying?
Do you think Mitt has finally learned, after Trump, Clint and Meat Loaf, to run away from celebrities bearing endorsements?
Doesn't look like it.
Good point.
Assume celebs suck.
"Mitt has finally learned"
One of these things is not like the other.
No, because he is so out of touch w/ even his people (CRACKERS!!) he has no idea who is & isn't a real celeb these days.
He probably has an Osmond Bros. reunion planned for next wknd.'s big GOTV rallies.
Has anyone yet explained to Mitt that Trump, Clint and Meatloaf are celebrities? I don't know if that information is in his database.
On the bright side, Romney in the White House a few years and America won't be beautiful anymore. So no more song for Meatloaf to ruin.
Spacious skies = coal darkened skies
Amber waves of grain = Emerald waves of subsidized corn
Purple mountains = Permanent Winter Olympics
Fruited plains = Heterosexuals-only plains.
Crown thy good with brotherhood = every man for himself
Amber waves of parched corn. No need to change the color.
I am a big fan of Wonkette, but it's posts like this that lead me to believe that the people who run this site secretly hate us and are trying to get us to drink ourselves to death.
If I were Mitt, this would impact my self-esteem.
Yes, it was almost as bad as when that person from the diner touched him.
"Jeeves, draw my bath and don't forget the anti-bacterial soap."
Fortunately for those of us who enjoy schaedenfreude-based humor, nothing impacts Mitt's self-esteem.
Let's imagine what would happen if Obama had laughed while someone sang "America The Beautiful" like that at his rally…
"This is yet more evidence of Obama's disdain for America, her history and her sacred values." — AOTK.
So Obama has Springsteen, Tom Hanks, and Morgan Freeman. And Romney gets Meat Loaf, Dave Mustaine, and half of Big & Rich.
Don't forget Ted Nugent or he'll blow you to smithereens and have you for dinner.
Let me guess which half of Rig and Bitch Romney got.
And Lindsay Lohan, maybe sorta-kinda we'll see possibly.
Like a Snowball in Hell, I'll be gone when the 7th comes…
Assume Romney revolted.
Mr. Loaf should stick with his movie career. I'm thinking: Meatloaf versus Predator
I always did hate and despise Meatloaf, and retroactively, I now know why.
I know Mitt Romney'd do anything to get elected, but I'm surprised he'd do that.
Romney has Meatloaf, Obama has Katy Perry.
However, Meatloaf does have bigger titays.
(reprising yesterday's poetry corner)
so much depends
upon
a red-faced
belter
glazed with slick
man-sweat
beside the white
Mormons.
I just love it when somebody does a poem parody and I actually get the reference. Well done.
Meatloaf. It's all shit in the morning.
It's like the Romney campaign said "shit we need to tailor-make something for Wonkette!"
It's nice to know they're thinking of us!
Remember how this guy got his name. At a drunken teenage party, he lay down in the parking lot and let someone drive the front wheel of a truck over his head. The reaction: "Wow, dude, you must have brains of meatloaf". True story.
OT but mr fuflans' first call for barry today got a convicted felon (for assaulting a cop).
mr fuflans reminded him that he can still volunteer to intimidate romney supporters at the polling place of his choice.
Way to go. Keep plugging. I sort of wish that my plans to actually be in Ohio worked out cause East Coast of NJ, BarneyFrankenstorm and like not getting any time off from work. Still I made about 60 phone calls to an area code near Columbus from the OFA list.
We all must do our part. All praise to you and Mr. F.
I'm waiting for Willard to cut Mr. Meat's hair!
Mitt just needs someone to help him lock up the youth vote. What's Axl Rose up to?
And he's hoping Vanilla Ice will help him with the "urban" vote.
Personally, I blame too much consumption of genetically modified waves of grain.
Meat Loaf goes with Romney, but the heart and soul of his Bat Out of Hell album comes from Max and Roy of the E Street Band with Little Stevie being the glue that got the album recorded and Springsteen goes with Obama. Maybe this is why Meat Loaf looked in pain, left out in the rain again.
Now, for a map out of OHIO which is sure to offend someone. https://secure.ohiodems.org/page/smartproxy/BSD_B…
Florida was mislabeled. s/b "Pudenda".
That does it. I'm burning all of my Meatloaf recordings. Wait, that's right, I don't have any.
Meat Loaf was the anthem to my youth. I'm crushed to see him like this. :(
… but it was long ago and it was far away, oh God it seems so very far. And if life is just a highway, then the soul is just a car.
And objects in the rear view mirror may appear closer than they are, objects in the rear view mirror may appear closer than they are…
She still brings the funny: From @ElayneBoosler:
"Meat Loaf Endorses Romney At Ohio Rally." Can Chopped Liver be far behind?
I thought Mr. Loaf & Egg were siblings.
The folks who posted the secret Linda McCartney tape must be healous jealous that they've finally been topped.
Even NY police officer Gil ("female, it's what's for dinner") Valle was heard to comment, "Meatloaf again?"
I thought Roseanne Barr was running for president against Romney, not changing her name to Meatloaf and endorsing Romney.
I'm now in favor of a Romney presidency. It'll lead to a counter-cultural revival; beatniks will come back, as will real (stupid) rock & roll. Which will be better than those effing hipsters, American Id-hole, &c.
Praying for the end of time…
to match the end of intonation?
I want to be there for the introduction.
"Mitt, meet Meat.
Meat, meet Mitt."
This is nowhere near as cool as Axl Rose endorsing Obama.
Forever waves of pain…
"The highly successful Romney event was topped by a moment of musical genius by a top wattage star singing at the top of his game," said nobody, and Jennifer Rubin.
Well, he apparently committed voter fraud so I guess he really is a Republican.
http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/meat-loaf-…
I voted today! Another nail in R/R's coffin- with votes
Meatloaf's real first name is Leslie.
Wolf Blitzer's real first name is Leslie.
Coincidence?
I THINK NOT!!
What, no Victoria Jackson or Hank Williams, Jr.? WTF? WTF, indeed!
Et tu, John Rich?
"…you Mr. Trump recognized that the real problem was a lack of leadership and so ultimately you didn’t blame Lil’ Jon or Meatloaf. You fired Gary Busey, and these are the decisions that would keep me up at night. Well handled, sir."
-President Obama, WHCD 2011
You know Meat looks like he is receiving at a gang bang in the pic.
But the question Willard posed years ago still stands:
Who let the dogs out?
Who?
Who?
Time for Americal to pinch off this Loaf.
I can see a pair of dicks by the dashboard lights!
This video is no longer available due to a copyright claim by Red Pony Tours,
PROTIP: Compact machines that have recording capabilities are ubiquitous. If you are an over-the-hill yelper who just chumped it hard in front of a huge crowd with smartphones, pulling the video AFTER it goes viral may not be the cunning plan for you. In fact, weeks or even months later, after your inevitable humiliating loss of a Fair Use lawsuit, you yourself risk making your EPIC FAIL go viral all over again.
I'm down.
Mitt doesn't care for your Parliamentary ways.
George Clinton/Hillary Clinton 2016!
Oh knew it was snark. Just wanted to nail it on the wall.
Understood. Today we are all over zealous carpenters!
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