TODAY IN MILD OATHS  2:10 pm October 25, 2012

History’s Greatest Monster Barack Obama Calls Poor Defenseless Mitt Romney A Vile Swear

by Rebecca Schoenkopf

He is poopingOh dear oh dear! Supposed “cool guy” Barack Obama called fragile, defenseless centimillionaire former CEO and current Republican nominee for president of these godfearing United States of America Mittens Romney a vile swear meaning one who defecates like boy cows, and the Republic may crumble from the dastardly act. What if children who unaccountably look up to the Thug in Chief start also talking about potty words like pooping boy cows? WHAT THEN?

That is bullying indeed, lady we had never heard of before Josh Marshall retweeted your incisive and prissy and pissy tweet.

Let us wag our fingers at some other history’s greatest monsters, together!

Well those were fun! Enjoy your anal rapes! We will be over here with our canned goods (hobo beans), waiting for the Republic to fall.

[Yahoo]

 
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{ 245 comments }

snowpointsecret October 25, 2012 at 2:11 pm

Hey, it could have been worse:

There once was a man named Mitt
They said he was full of shit
I don't know how to finish this limerick
so I'll just say he was quite the dick.

midnighttoker69 October 25, 2012 at 2:30 pm

Limericks are my specialty … let me see what I can rip off the top of my head

A candidate Romney, named Mitt
Accused of spouting bullshit
Was burned by the Pres
Offensive, Mitt says
Before wandering off in a snit.

One more try:

There once was a rich man called Mittens
A mean man to puppies and kittens
When he was called out
For bullshit, he'd pout
And expect us to live off a pittance.

snowpointsecret October 25, 2012 at 2:33 pm

That first one was just too beautiful. I wish I could do that, mine technically wasn't even a limerick.

midnighttoker69 October 25, 2012 at 2:38 pm

Well thank you. Sometimes I wish I'd done more in college than sell weed and get expelled.

CommieDad October 25, 2012 at 4:56 pm

Thanks for the chronic. Oh yeah, that bag I bought 15 years ago was a little heavy and the guilt is killing me. I owe you 1/64 of an ounce. Can I donate $5 to Initiative 520 in your name?

Chet Kincaid_ October 25, 2012 at 2:40 pm

Nicely done!

Esteev October 25, 2012 at 2:40 pm

Can I try?

Candidate Romney has been lying
When called on it, he starts crying
His running-mate Ryan is no better
forgetting what he asked for in letters
They're quite upset the election isn't for buying

midnighttoker69 October 25, 2012 at 2:45 pm

Very Good. Isn't this fun?

C'mon Rebecca, play along with us.

Esteev October 25, 2012 at 2:48 pm

Thanks! Yours were hysterical. It is rather cathartic.

fatbob54 October 25, 2012 at 2:54 pm

Some say Romney's a liar
Whose pants are always on fire
"I don't lie" he states
"I just prevaricates"
Cuz the rubes are gullible buyers

rickmaci October 25, 2012 at 3:17 pm

Not up to your standard but a guy can try.

There once was a man named Mitt
A gov from old Massachusett.
To be president he thought
was a job to be bought,
if voters just ignored his bullshit.

mrblifil October 25, 2012 at 3:16 pm

Old Mittens was quite the bullshitter
But when called out he'd get very bitter
Lot's of ranting and stormin'
Unbecoming of a Mormon:
"Show respect for your betters, you dumb nigger!"

tessiee October 25, 2012 at 3:18 pm

Roses are red,
Violets are blue.
Mitt's a dick,
And Ryan is, too.

Nothingisamiss October 25, 2012 at 6:14 pm

It's like a valentine!

Negropolis October 26, 2012 at 1:58 am

There once was a son he named Tagg…

There once was a fella named Mittens
Who loved to drown nothing but kittens…

Wait, I think I've finally got the hang of this:

Mitt the unscrupulous Mormon
Did nothing but screw even more men
Confronted with truth
He reverts to his youth
And hides all his funds in the Caymans.

YasserArraFeck October 29, 2012 at 5:00 pm

Mittens, who would be Commander
Is running with Ryan, the Ayn Rander
They'll shake every hand
And kiss every ass
There's no-one to whom they won't pander

nounverb911 October 25, 2012 at 2:12 pm

But it's still okay when the Snobilly Grifter goes all racist on Barry.

zumpie October 25, 2012 at 2:14 pm

No, YOU'RE the raciost for pointing out that her racist behavior was racist!

stly92 October 25, 2012 at 3:09 pm

And besides, it's a known fact that racism never negatively affected anybody in the whole history of the united states! stop being such a libtard cry baby!

KathrynSane October 25, 2012 at 2:13 pm

Definitely a poor choice of words–Lord knows Mittens deserves so much worse.

jjdaddyo October 25, 2012 at 2:44 pm

Richard Dawson says: "2nd most popular answer… survey says: "Total Fucking Liar"!

BlueMonkeh October 25, 2012 at 4:30 pm

Hrrrmmm….fuck you you fucking fuck comes to mind.

Loch_Nessosaur October 25, 2012 at 2:13 pm

Oh My Heck!

nounverb911 October 25, 2012 at 2:16 pm

Heck? He's running for Congress in the Washington 10th.
Denny Heck

zumpie October 25, 2012 at 2:21 pm

Against evil hypocrite fundie bitch Jaime Hererra Beutel (or whatever her last name is now), correct?

Chet Kincaid_ October 25, 2012 at 2:42 pm

What a shame that the guy can't admit anywhere on his site, not even once, that he is a Democrat.

tracyhasfun October 25, 2012 at 2:26 pm

HAHAHA! MORMON SWEAR! MORMON SWEAR!

Gleem McShineys October 25, 2012 at 4:20 pm

H-E-DOUBLE-CAFFEINATED HOTDRINKSTICKS

AngryBlakGuy October 25, 2012 at 2:13 pm

…when did politicians(excuse my French) become pussies?!?!

fatbob54 October 25, 2012 at 2:55 pm

I thought they were assholes and dicks. I guess that means we aren't what we eat…

AngryBlakGuy October 25, 2012 at 3:18 pm

…good point, if that was case would be maggot infested bags of steamy gorilla shyt!!!

cletar October 25, 2012 at 6:28 pm

Around 2000 or so.

Barbara_ October 25, 2012 at 2:14 pm

Maybe Romney doesn't curse, but those many pink slips he's handed out, leaving people without health insurance, vulnerable to losing their homes and not being able to afford education for their children just screams "FUCK YOU!"

Chet Kincaid_ October 25, 2012 at 2:44 pm

Wielding your mighty machete, you have cut to the chase!

Maman October 25, 2012 at 2:45 pm

Technically, bullshit isn't cursing. It is just vulgar. Romney has an elevator for his cars and a horse that wears a hat of velvet and pearls… I am pretty sure he is familiar with the concept.

eaglewon October 25, 2012 at 7:01 pm

my ass he does't curse.

YasserArraFeck October 29, 2012 at 4:38 pm

Kick him in the 'Nads and see if he yells "Oh My Gosh!!" or "MotherFUCKER!!"

SorosBot October 25, 2012 at 2:14 pm

We already know Mitt doesn't drink; now apparently he doesn't curse either? How could anyone trust that man?

Loch_Nessosaur October 25, 2012 at 2:16 pm

Mormons are not allowed to curse. Hence the expression I posted above – Oh my heck!

AngryBlakGuy October 25, 2012 at 2:17 pm

…1 thing I learned in college is never trust a man that has never woken up the next morning and wondered WTF did I do last night!

Esteev October 25, 2012 at 2:26 pm

You can trust Esteev.

AngryBlakGuy October 25, 2012 at 2:49 pm

…amen brother!

NYNYNYjr October 25, 2012 at 2:18 pm

He don't even drink coffee. Or drink sodie pop. He's a 'holy man'. Unlike you dirt bags.

Loch_Nessosaur October 25, 2012 at 2:23 pm

I think they can drink white soda (sprite, 7up, etc) but not dark soda (Coke, Pepsi, etc) because of the caffeine.

AngryBlakGuy October 25, 2012 at 2:25 pm

…orange soda? It matches his spray tan!

Toomush_Infer October 25, 2012 at 2:29 pm

I believe that the Mormon Church owns a good share of Coca-Cola…

mille derps October 25, 2012 at 2:30 pm

The prohibition is on hot drinks, technically. Because the famous hot drinks of the 19th century (tea & coffee) both had caffeine & there seemed to be no other reason for prohibiting coffee & tea, the assumption amongst some Mormons is that caffeine is the real target of the prohibition on hot drinks.

Other Mormons want their mofo Iced tea, NOW!

sullivanst October 25, 2012 at 2:46 pm

"Served at the temperature of hell", is apparently the objection. And to think, that's so far from the weirdest thing about their religion.

doloras October 25, 2012 at 5:02 pm

Doctrines and Covenants 137 quotes Joe Smith as saying: "Hot liquids are for the outside of your body, not the inside. Thus saith JHVH his own self."

finallyhappy October 25, 2012 at 2:33 pm

That White Mountain Dew packs a load of caffeine- wonder f they sneak it into a sprite bottle

HELisforHEL October 25, 2012 at 2:35 pm

Yep.

tessiee October 25, 2012 at 3:29 pm

Carbonated beverages are Satan's farts.

HarryButtle October 25, 2012 at 3:40 pm

It's the "no darkie" rule…applies to Presidents AND to soda.

emmelemm October 25, 2012 at 2:31 pm

Don't drink, don't smoke, what do you do?
Don't drink, don't smoke, what do you do?
Subtle innuendos follow…

HELisforHEL October 25, 2012 at 2:36 pm

Adam Ant is more qualified to be a candidatehuman than Mittens.

natl_[redacted]_cmdr October 25, 2012 at 2:52 pm

Also, he has a valise.

OkieDokieDog October 25, 2012 at 3:00 pm

For Pete's sake! Mittens is a Mormon Bishop.

PugglesRule October 26, 2012 at 11:00 am

The pink slips are repetitive obscenities that make me rather nauseous.

AlterNewt October 25, 2012 at 2:14 pm

We are fortunate that there are no issues of any importance at stake in this election.

SnarkOff October 25, 2012 at 2:14 pm

Shh. Don't tell her about "Santorum."

Terry October 25, 2012 at 2:41 pm

Don't tell her what John McCain has publicly called his wife, either.

tessiee October 25, 2012 at 3:30 pm

What's santorum? Is there a link I can click on?

Gleem McShineys October 25, 2012 at 3:47 pm

Can't go there, it is quite a slippery slope.

emmelemm October 25, 2012 at 4:08 pm

Sometimes frothy.

SorosBot October 25, 2012 at 2:15 pm

How dare Obama call that motherfucking cocksucker a bullshitter!

DemmeFatale October 25, 2012 at 2:15 pm

Clutching at straws much, wingtard assholes?
(I love the smell of desperation in the morning!)

ph7 October 25, 2012 at 2:15 pm

Next move: Ellen Carmichael and Paul Ryan will tackle Obama the bully, so Romney can cut the freak's hair.

PugglesRule October 26, 2012 at 11:01 am

Maybe Mitt will let Tagg have the honors, instead of just taking a swing.

Disassembly October 25, 2012 at 2:16 pm

I'm more shocked that Romney doesn't swear. He's running for office, for Pete's sake.

sullivanst October 25, 2012 at 2:24 pm

Yeah, it's really not true that Mitt doesn't swear.

Disassembly October 25, 2012 at 3:16 pm

Thank the three heavens, I thought this was going to be the Game Change.

ph7 October 25, 2012 at 2:32 pm

Even Nixon, a goddamned Quaker, could throw down.

red_kira October 25, 2012 at 2:17 pm

2012 version of the 1963 newsreel:

President Kennedy: Are you telling me that BLEEEEEP did BLEEP that incompetent BLEEEP! They just BLEEEP the Air Force budget!

Gobsmacked. Really. We were so much more grown up back then!

delaney_blom October 25, 2012 at 2:39 pm

My favorite part of the JFK clip is that he wouldn't put that silly bastard in charge of a cathouse. President Kennedy knew that discretion is one indispensible quality of a brothel operator.

elviouslyqueer October 25, 2012 at 2:17 pm

Shit-ass motherfucking cocksucking cunty twat says goddamn fucking what?

SnarkOff October 25, 2012 at 2:21 pm

Bravo, sir.

BaldarTFlagass October 25, 2012 at 2:24 pm

Dang Elvis, it's like we share the same Tourette's (see my post below).

Loch_Nessosaur October 25, 2012 at 2:25 pm

John McCain, is that you,?

Callyson October 25, 2012 at 2:29 pm

A shitload of sorry ass fucked up crappy fucking bullshit.

OkieDokieDog October 25, 2012 at 3:03 pm

I find myself more and more screaming, You lying cocksucking motherfucker at every GOP/Teabaggie twatwaffle I hear squawking on the teevee box. Also too; pundits.

bikerlaureate October 25, 2012 at 2:17 pm

The President isn't walking this back. Excellent.
No matter what, Plouffe and company must not apologize for this.

deanbooth October 25, 2012 at 4:42 pm

"That's a bullshit question!" replied Plouffe.

smitallica October 25, 2012 at 6:07 pm

Or if they do, they should say. "I'm sorry. I meant to say 'cocksucking shitfaced lying magic-underwear cult-member megarich heartless motherfucker who's not going to win.'"

Detesticle October 25, 2012 at 2:18 pm

That's actually what the ballot says in Nevada.

[] Mitt "Bullshitter" Romney
[] Barry "Chair" Obama
[] Ayn Rand's Ghost

Oblios_Cap October 25, 2012 at 2:18 pm

It seems like only yesterday that the right wingers accused us liberals of being termminally offended about everything.

Projection is a bitch.

Geminisunmars October 25, 2012 at 2:20 pm

Are you suggesting that it is their turn to be terminal?

Oblios_Cap October 25, 2012 at 2:35 pm

One can only hope.

BoroPrimorac October 25, 2012 at 3:44 pm

Just another example of liberal tolerance, right?

Next motherfucker that uses that bullshit line on me is getting headbutted.

reliefsinn October 25, 2012 at 4:29 pm

As a matter of fact, no, liberals are not tolerant of things like idiocy, hypocrisy, and racism, especially the just beneath the surface variety typified by the Coulters, Hannitys, and Becks of this world.
So no, we are not tolerant, and we are not going to apologize for it, bitchez.
Screw being tolerant, screw it screw it screw it.

CrunchyKnee October 25, 2012 at 2:18 pm

Willard was so shocked and taken aback that he had to change his magic underpants.

iburl October 25, 2012 at 2:18 pm

"Bullshitter" is actually a gross understatement of Romney's utter lack of connection to any scrap of truth.

pdiddycornchips October 25, 2012 at 2:18 pm

How could you leave out Dick Cheney?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dYY1oDDYS18

Esteev October 25, 2012 at 2:18 pm

Well the Right has been calling a spade a spade for a while now so this is only fair.

BaldarTFlagass October 25, 2012 at 2:18 pm

Well, lady, I often call Romney a "lying cocksucking motherfucking full-of-shit asshole Mormon motherfucker." But that's when I'm in a kind mood. Why don't you fucking tweet that?

zumpie October 25, 2012 at 2:18 pm

Two things:

1) Nice pearl clutching no doubt potty mouthed bitch whom I do not give a rat's ass about.

2) I know that bull is pooping because my kitty wears much the same blssfull expression when SHE poohs in her litter box (yes, I find it almost disturbing)

Esteev October 25, 2012 at 2:22 pm

I, too, have that blissful expression whilst pooping.

zumpie October 25, 2012 at 2:39 pm

Well, as long as you're happy

tessiee October 25, 2012 at 3:37 pm

"There is nothing quite so under-rated as a good shit" — Some old-timey guy

bikerlaureate October 25, 2012 at 2:19 pm

Where's Ellen Carmichael's complaint about despicable Ann's use of the r-word – to describe the freakin' President of the United States?

elviouslyqueer October 25, 2012 at 2:52 pm

Ann's not running for president, though. Q.E.D.

bikerlaureate October 25, 2012 at 3:25 pm

True. In my haste to post I didn't see the mismatched comparison.

I was trying to riff off her use of "bully", because calling a liar a "bullshitter" is apparently classic bully behavior…?

FakaktaSouth October 25, 2012 at 2:19 pm

Okay then, how about using the words of W to the Big Dick Cheney? Mitt Romney? "That guy's a real asshole." I don't trust a guy who doesn't know how to use the creative words.

pdiddycornchips October 25, 2012 at 2:34 pm

"Bigtime"

prommie October 25, 2012 at 2:40 pm

Wasn't it Dick Cheney the sneering drunken lawyer-shooting torturing war criminal who said to, who was it, you are young, you remember stuff, but didn't he say "fuck you" to someone in the Senate chamber?

I like how you talk, though. Very very creative.

FakaktaSouth October 25, 2012 at 2:43 pm

I believe he said "go fuck yourself" but I may be confusing the phrase with just his blanket policy for all of America.

sullivanst October 25, 2012 at 2:50 pm

Yes, he told Pat Leahy to go fuck himself. When Chris Wallace asked him if he'd really said it, he grinned with enormous self-pride and said "Yes". Clearly it was one of the world's greatest rhetorical achievements, in his own mind.

prommie October 25, 2012 at 2:54 pm

Considering that he never championed a policy that was not a complete disaster, often criminal, venial, or corrupt, and otherwise an utter failure, its clear that his entire reputation, such as it is, comes from his ability to convince people even stupider than himself of his genius.

tessiee October 25, 2012 at 3:39 pm
Blunderthing October 25, 2012 at 2:19 pm

I'm shocked, SHOCKED to find that politicians say things to sway votes.

MiniMencken October 25, 2012 at 2:19 pm

I, for one, am shocked! Shocked, I tell you!

sullivanst October 25, 2012 at 2:19 pm

Dick Cheney LIBEL!

BaldarTFlagass October 25, 2012 at 2:19 pm

"bullsh*tter."

How do you pronounce that "*" thing, anyway?

Blueb4sinrise October 25, 2012 at 2:27 pm

weedlord bonerhitler?

sullivanst October 25, 2012 at 2:29 pm

"bullshweedlordbonerhitlertter"

That's quite a mouthful.

Eurgh!

widestanceromance October 25, 2012 at 2:44 pm

Who knows (it looks like something from a Kenyan alphabet)?*

*all too often it's asterick

Chet Kincaid_ October 25, 2012 at 2:55 pm

"BullshBEEPter."

Sharkey October 25, 2012 at 5:50 pm

Star Me Kitten?

hilacious October 25, 2012 at 7:17 pm

"asshole" *

*thank you Kurt Vonnegut

mbobier October 25, 2012 at 2:20 pm

Someone should help this lady off her fainting couch, revive her with smelling salts, make sure she doesn't get tendonitis from clutching her pearls, and gently inform her that when you describe someone in accurate terms, that is not bullying; it's truth-telling. But the latter is something wingnuts have trouble recognizing, anyway.

edgydrifter October 25, 2012 at 2:20 pm

Romney doesn't use obscenities personally. He has people to do that for him.

Chet Kincaid_ October 25, 2012 at 2:56 pm

Sununu.

tessiee October 25, 2012 at 3:41 pm

Is that why he thinks "pendejo" means "Yes, Boss"?

asterixaverni October 25, 2012 at 2:20 pm

Jesus Fucking H. Christ! Can't the President get this straight? What.The.Fuck!?! Romney isn't a bullshiter.

HE IS A FUCKING LIAR!

Four letter word Mr. President: LIAR! Use it!

kittenbomb October 25, 2012 at 2:22 pm

It is boorish indeed because Lord Mittens cannot respondeth in kind.

He knows naught of the lowly talk of unwashed common folk. Nor doeth any of his sister wives allow their handmaidens to speak aloud.

AngryBlakGuy October 25, 2012 at 2:22 pm

…by the way, I swear that there was this one cliff note in the bible about "the love of money being the root of all evil" and "it is harder for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God than a camel to fit through the eye of a needle". I think cursing is probably at the bottom of God's "I don't give a shyt about" list!!!

KathrynSane October 25, 2012 at 2:28 pm

"Again I tell you, it is harder for a rich man* to enter the kingdom of God than a camel to fit through the eye of a needle.

*unless he is a Job Creator™"

Straight from the mouth of White Capitalist Jesus.

AngryBlakGuy October 25, 2012 at 2:53 pm

…or he has Binders upon binder of women!

sullivanst October 25, 2012 at 2:56 pm

Pretty sure that part got left out of the Book of Mormon.

AngryBlakGuy October 25, 2012 at 3:21 pm

…you mean the Binder of Mormon!

sullivanst October 25, 2012 at 3:44 pm

The Book is mostly just weird. The Binder is seriously creepy.

kyeshinka October 25, 2012 at 2:24 pm

Oh willy nilly my stars, I do decleh-yuh! That uppity Obama don't talk lahk no gentlmen!

hagajim October 25, 2012 at 2:24 pm

I guess when you're calling a spade a spade you might as well call a bullshitter a bullshitter. But bullshitters are usually egotisitcal assholes as well – oh wait. Nevermind.

Callyson October 25, 2012 at 2:24 pm

"I wouldn't have him running a cathouse"

Yeah, what JFK said…

Fox n Fiends October 25, 2012 at 2:25 pm

I'm sure Vladdy Putin will never ever say anything coarse to/about your hypothetical President Romney

AngryBlakGuy October 25, 2012 at 2:58 pm

…I am pretty sure Putin drops the "ruskey" version of an F-Bomb every other sentence when he is off air! At least, that is what I do when I replace vodka for milk in my morning Cheerios.

YasserArraFeck October 29, 2012 at 4:44 pm

"Fuck you and the dinosaur you rode in on"

HRH_Maddie October 25, 2012 at 2:25 pm

I, for one, am glad to have a president who doesn't swear like Ned Flanders.

kyeshinka October 25, 2012 at 2:28 pm

I don't want no son-of-a-diddly Romney cursing up a storm. What would Jesus say?

sudsmckenzie October 25, 2012 at 2:25 pm

When asked for comment, Dick Cheney replied "go fuck yourself'.

Spurning Beer October 25, 2012 at 2:25 pm

That's about the kindest thing I can think to say about Mitt.

(Note to self: Potential limerick using the rhyme of Mitt and ****)

snowpointsecret October 25, 2012 at 2:26 pm

If you can find a better way to finish off mine, go for it.

Toomush_Infer October 25, 2012 at 2:35 pm

There once was a candidate, Mitt
whose opponent called his plans bullshit,
When asked to reply,
he gave a great sigh,
and said his religion said "golly"….

mille derps October 25, 2012 at 2:42 pm

Dagnabbit libel!

RomneysLogCabin October 25, 2012 at 2:25 pm

Shit, piss, fuck, cunt, cocksucker, motherfucker, and tits.

No hyphen, no problem.

Dildeaux October 25, 2012 at 2:26 pm

romney doesnt cuss?

And I dont believe in Planet Kolob.

Nut up, bitch.

Joshua Norton October 25, 2012 at 2:27 pm

One thing I've learned from this election cycle – Always take a pen and paper with you when you go camping or plan to hike the desert. That way, if you get lost, you can just start writing an article about Obama. Right away some douche bag will come along and tell you how it's all wrong.

hagajim October 25, 2012 at 2:28 pm

Gotta love the LBJ gay rapey jokes. I assume the Maryland ministers will kill him and his entire family? Oh – and Walnuts sure likes to bandy about the fuck word doesn't he….hmmmm.

DCBloom October 25, 2012 at 2:28 pm

I thought it was Joe's job to do all the cussing for the administration? Does Barry have to do EVERYTHING?

tracyhasfun October 25, 2012 at 2:28 pm

Well, this is obviously a fuck-up. Obv.

Crank_Tango October 25, 2012 at 2:30 pm

Please, spread the outrage! Barry used his nuts for once, praise babby jesus. Tell everyone everyone everyone about how barry called that cocksucking missionizer a BULLSHITTER.

He also said Ellen Carmichael is "pretty cunty."

mormos October 25, 2012 at 2:30 pm

If the boot fits partner.

Lucidamente1 October 25, 2012 at 2:30 pm

I for one am worried that politicians don't swear as much as they did in 1917.

JustPixelz October 25, 2012 at 2:30 pm

I swear BO only said "bullmitter".

finallyhappy October 25, 2012 at 2:35 pm

Thank you, Bristol

Negropolis October 26, 2012 at 2:25 am

I said Boo urns.

prommie October 25, 2012 at 2:31 pm

Its worse than rape!

docterry6973 October 25, 2012 at 2:50 pm

What kind of rape? Legitimate? Forcible? God-given? Easy? These days you need to be specific.

Toomush_Infer October 25, 2012 at 2:31 pm

I don't see how calling MItt a bullshitter can be a problem – his handlers said they weren't going to depend on fact checkers….

prommie October 25, 2012 at 2:34 pm

Dick Cheney's "fuck you" doesn't make the parade of cussing?

Chet Kincaid_ October 25, 2012 at 3:04 pm

No Cheescake Avatar Of The Week? I haz a disappoint.

prommie October 25, 2012 at 3:29 pm

But is so blatantly phallic!

BlueStateLibel October 25, 2012 at 2:34 pm

The more I read about this Barack guy, the more I like him. Lady hormones-permitting, I'll definitely be voting for him.

zumpie October 25, 2012 at 2:34 pm

Oh also, too: if you watch British TV (or PBS) they haven't bleeped "shit" or "bullshit" for quite awhile now.

And….

1) Krusty sure does enjoy cursing doesn't he? That is QUITE the potty mouth HE has! NO wonder his brother told a 911 operator "fuck you" when she got annoyed with his tying up the line to bitch about traffic.

2) I have always viewed JFK as a fairly over rated Prez, who largely benefitted from the mystique of an untimely death. That said, I found him both fairly restrained ($5K would've fully furnished several entire homes in 1963 and Jordan Marsh was a mid-range store) and kinda awesome by concluding, "no, you'd call it a fuck up".

sullivanst October 25, 2012 at 2:43 pm

British TV doesn't beep fuck after 9pm, either.

imissopus October 25, 2012 at 2:34 pm

Weirdly, she seems to have deleted the tweet. Way to stand up for your principle, ya cunthole.

PuckStopsHere October 25, 2012 at 2:35 pm

Oh, my stars and garters.

pdiddycornchips October 25, 2012 at 2:36 pm

If Barry called him a bullshitter, that's what god intended.

Hammiepants October 25, 2012 at 2:36 pm

I was hoping for "dissembling miserly feces-spewing asstard" myself.

Chet Kincaid_ October 25, 2012 at 2:36 pm

He sassed Romney?! The Founding Fathers knew what to do about Toby's Insubordination!

barto October 25, 2012 at 2:36 pm

You know what's really classy, Ellen? Characterizing 47% or your fellow Americans as lazy parasites, that's what's classy. Now go get a real job, you tapeworm.

KeepFnThatChicken October 25, 2012 at 2:40 pm

Did he also drink a Coke while calling Mitt a bullshitter? Because they can't drink caffeine either!

And did he say it before 1978? Because blah people weren't grandfathered in before then.

And Mitt's tough anyway. That magic underwear will deflect anything.

Terry October 25, 2012 at 2:40 pm

When you read any tweet or other form of communication from Ellen Carmichael, remember that she used to be Herman Cain's campaign communications director. That really says it all.

Chet Kincaid_ October 25, 2012 at 3:06 pm

She got a job, didn't she?!

FNMA October 25, 2012 at 3:18 pm

Really? Who'd she have to blow to get that….oh. Never mind…

tessiee October 25, 2012 at 3:47 pm

It's impolite to tweet with your mouth full.

Sassomatic October 25, 2012 at 2:42 pm

Well somebody bring my smellin' salts!

MinAgain October 25, 2012 at 2:42 pm

"Bullshitter" is not technically a curse word. It's a vulgarity. But I wouldn't expect Republicans to know the difference.

Bezoar October 25, 2012 at 3:06 pm

What about "Fuck your bullshit!"?

Generation[redacted] October 25, 2012 at 2:43 pm

I don't see what she's complaining about. Bullshit is a perfectly cromulent word.

natl_[redacted]_cmdr October 25, 2012 at 2:47 pm

The use of which embiggens us all.

arduinohacker October 25, 2012 at 2:44 pm

Wow, actually, staying a bit classy. Notice she doesn't DENY that Romney is a BS'er. With something like 666 Romney LIES well documented so far,
( http://www.addictinginfo.org/2012/09/08/mitt-romn… )

.. she's not willing to re-lie that far. Just blaming the Prez for telling the absolute truth.

delaney_blom October 25, 2012 at 2:44 pm

What does "bullshitter" even mean? Is this the jive-talk I've been hearing so much about?

docterry6973 October 25, 2012 at 2:52 pm

I don't know. We need to ask a Bee-Gee. Quickly.

sullivanst October 25, 2012 at 2:53 pm

Before they're all dead?

natl_[redacted]_cmdr October 25, 2012 at 2:45 pm

JFK saying "Well, obviously this is a fuck up." = awesome.

DerrickWildcat October 25, 2012 at 2:46 pm

I don't get her. Is she punishing herself?

weejee October 25, 2012 at 2:46 pm

Rmoney is a poopyhead.

rickmaci October 25, 2012 at 2:47 pm

Damn. I think this means Obama is a real Republican!!!

natl_[redacted]_cmdr October 25, 2012 at 2:53 pm

Jesus fucking Christ Walnuts settle the fuck down for fuck's sake you whiny shitbag fuck.

poorgradstudent October 25, 2012 at 2:54 pm

To paraphrase a favorite Internet personality of mine, "Mitt Romney so fucking sucks he fucks. He so sucking fucks he sucks."

tessiee October 25, 2012 at 3:49 pm

Romney and his minions are the suckiest bunch of sucks that ever sucked:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ARITnC80VhE

Bezoar October 25, 2012 at 2:58 pm

Shouldn't that be "centibillionaire"? Or wait, "decibillionaire"? Fucking metric system.

fatbob54 October 25, 2012 at 3:04 pm

He meant "Blahshitter"

Bezoar October 25, 2012 at 3:05 pm

Maybe "megahundredaire"?

fatbob54 October 25, 2012 at 3:06 pm

Wait till Obama starts in on his mama.

I_P October 25, 2012 at 3:07 pm

This is a big fucking deal!

/No it's not…

Nopantsmcgee October 25, 2012 at 3:15 pm

Not that I am an overly sensitive farmer's boy or anything but there's no fucking thing in the world called a 'boy-cow', unless you refer to the male of the human species as boy-girls, as well to be consistent.

Moo, bitches.

tessiee October 25, 2012 at 4:03 pm

According to "Return of the Straight Dope", the generic, singular (as opposed to "cattle", which is plural), non-gender-specific word for the animal that says "moo" is "bovine". "Neat" or "beef" are also correct, but have fallen into disuse.

Chet Kincaid_ October 25, 2012 at 3:16 pm

The General blinked. His chops went dry. His mug drained. "Yes Mr. President." Jack clicked off. The General grabbed desk, steadied, punched the intercom. "Get Pete Bondurant on the line." He poured Scotch and waited. "Pete, brace Kemper Boyd and Ward Littel. Get the Cubans and Drac's Mormons on this, too. Son Of A Bitch Jack's got to go."

prommie October 25, 2012 at 3:57 pm

Whats it from? Or just your own? Best book about Dallas I ever read was Mailer's Harlot's Ghost. Cubans, Bushes, Brown Brothers Harriman and the wall street-CIA connection, oh man.

Chet Kincaid_ October 25, 2012 at 4:06 pm

Oh Proms, you don't recognize my pastiche of the rat-a-tat prose poetry of the Demon Dog, Mr. James Ellroy!? If you haven't read "American Tabloid," you will love it!
http://www.nytimes.com/books/01/05/20/specials/ta

prommie October 25, 2012 at 4:41 pm

Thats on my list now!

Chet Kincaid_ October 25, 2012 at 4:49 pm

America was never innocent. We popped our cherry on the boat over and looked back with no regrets. You can’t ascribe our fall from grace to any single event or set of circumstances. You can’t lose what you lacked at conception.

Mass-market nostalgia gets you hopped up for a past that never existed. Hagiography sanctifies shuck-and-jive politicians and reinvents their expedient gestures as moments of great moral weight. Our continuing narrative line is blurred past truth and hindsight. Only a reckless verisimilitude can set that line straight.

The real Trinity of Camelot was Look Good, Kick Ass, Get Laid. Jack Kennedy was the mythological front man for a particularly juicy slice of our history. He talked a slick line and wore a world-class haircut. He was Bill Clinton minus pervasive media scrutiny and a few rolls of flab.

Jack got whacked at the optimum moment to assure his sainthood. Lies continue to swirl around his eternal flame. It’s time to dislodge his urn and cast light on a few men who attended his ascent and facilitated his fall.

They were rogue cops and shakedown artists. They were wiretappers and soldiers of fortune and faggot lounge entertainers. Had one second of their lives deviated off course, American History would not exist as we know it.

It’s time to demythologize an era and build a new myth from the gutter to the stars. It’s time to embrace bad men and the price they paid to secretly define their time…

James Ellroy
(introduction to American Tabloid…a novel)

p.s., in the Ellroy Universe, "Drac" is Howard Hughes, if you hadn't guessed.

Antispandex October 25, 2012 at 3:18 pm

Well, it's obvious she isn't old enough to remember, or to have ever read a "book", but Nixon was a Quaker, and the man could bring the swears like nobody's business.

mrblifil October 25, 2012 at 3:19 pm

Ha! Adds poignancy to Mitt's grandson insisting on meeting Barack on stage. Hurts don't it motherfucker?

tessiee October 25, 2012 at 3:20 pm

Wait till Miz Ellen hears the tape where Joe Biden calls Mitt a fucking psychopath.

tessiee October 25, 2012 at 3:20 pm

A person who doesn't like being called a "goat fucker" might want to consider ceasing to fuck goats, at least on camera.

gullywompr October 25, 2012 at 3:29 pm

You could spend your whole life, ministering to the poor, healing the sick, and nobody would say anything, but you fuck one goat…

DickWharfinger October 25, 2012 at 3:27 pm

Delicate miss Ellen, Herman Cain's former mouthpiece, must have miseed Jon Stewart's show last night: the snowbilly as a hippo-shitter and the Donald.as a auto-coprophagic gorilla.

glamourdammerung October 25, 2012 at 3:30 pm

When I see this cretin show same concern for blatantly racist comments made against the President of the United States, then they might have a valid point. They probably won't, but they actually might at that point.

Troglodeity October 25, 2012 at 3:32 pm

Just call him a dogshitter: that's just a stone cold FACT. Ask Seamus.

Not_Mother October 25, 2012 at 3:39 pm

It coulda been worse. He coulda called him a bullshit artist.

PubOption October 25, 2012 at 3:42 pm

This after one of Todd Akin's staff called his opponent a 'bullshitshu" http://www.outsidethebeltway.com/stay-classy-todd

RufusTFirefly October 25, 2012 at 4:04 pm

How quickly we forget "Go fuck yourself."

docterry6973 October 25, 2012 at 4:23 pm

Well, after all Romney is white.

guangho October 25, 2012 at 4:24 pm

A man quite certain
That Mitt's a cretin
Types after work
A limerick about a rich man's hurt.

An_Outhouse October 25, 2012 at 4:24 pm

GO FUCK YOURSELF!

– Dick

Cleopatriot October 25, 2012 at 4:28 pm

You mean the guy who called the President "boy" can't handle some swears aimed in his general direction?

BoroPrimorac October 25, 2012 at 4:38 pm

This is just going to make Tagg want to take a swing at the president again.

joobajooba October 25, 2012 at 4:50 pm

Best LBJ tape — ordering pants from Mr. Hagar, with enough room for his "bunghole." http://youtu.be/S3GT9UN7nDo

Gleem McShineys October 25, 2012 at 7:22 pm

"Cuts right into mah taint!"

That is some of my most favorite historical audio, right there.

CommieDad October 25, 2012 at 4:59 pm

I am sure that the president has said worse. Today. About Mitt. Like, "That muthafucka is so fuckin going down in 12 days."

mavenmaven October 25, 2012 at 5:04 pm

Rape is from God, but dirty words are SATAN.

Wile E. Quixote October 25, 2012 at 5:05 pm

Of all of the things I hate about conservatives and Republicans like Carmichael the thing I hate most is their self-pity and their disgusting, pathetic cringing need to always be seen as
victims.

smitallica October 25, 2012 at 6:26 pm

Swearing is "beneath the dignity of the Presidency"? No.
Having to produce your birth certificate multiple times to prove you're not an illegitimate usurper from Kenya simply because you're brown? Yes, THAT would be beneath the dignity of the Presidency.

natl_[redacted]_cmdr October 25, 2012 at 6:26 pm

The President went on to say "WHERE'S MY MOTHERFUCKING ICED TEA MOTHERFUCKER?"

LibertyLover October 25, 2012 at 6:37 pm

Who wants a President that doesn't swear or drink anyway?

natl_[redacted]_cmdr October 25, 2012 at 6:40 pm

Yeah, what's Mittens gonna do if he hever gets in a fuck-tussle with Putin or someone? "For Pete's sake I'm the President for Pete's sake." For fuck's sake.

rocktonsam October 25, 2012 at 6:39 pm

"Mitt doesn't swear"

this just in… all men don't masturbate

dennis1943 October 25, 2012 at 6:54 pm

In the language of the people……..it had to be said……

Yankee_Steve October 25, 2012 at 7:09 pm

NEWT GINGRICH & PRES. OBAMA ARE CORRECT ABOUT ROMNEY
There's some fuss about Pres. Obama's truthfulness about Romney but Newt Gingrich called out Mitten$ months ago:

CBS correspondent Norah O'Donnell asking Gingrich, "Are you calling Mitt Romney a liar?"After a pause, Gingrich replies: "Yes."

SaintRond October 25, 2012 at 8:25 pm

Mormon cocksucker.

djneedlz October 25, 2012 at 8:29 pm

Obama practically raped Mitt's mind with this cussing stuff. But it's all part of God's plan.

ttommyunger October 25, 2012 at 9:44 pm

"Fucking liar" would have filled the bill to my taste.

CindynEncinitas October 26, 2012 at 1:12 am

If my fairy snarkmother were not here encouraging me to express my loathesome thoughts, I may be inclined to use rough language at the slightest inconvenience.

Negropolis October 26, 2012 at 1:59 am

But, you guys, he's running for president for Pete's sake!

They're just pissed he didn't honor him with the phrase Bullshit Creator. You know, 'cause Mitt built that shit!

slappy_maxwell October 26, 2012 at 11:35 am

What's the big deal?
Everybody knows Mitt's magic underwear doesn't leave skid marks.

aboutheagora October 27, 2012 at 4:24 am

I kan't say the letter 'B', but I kan say that this woman is a silly bunt. Also, Mitt Romney IS a bullshitter. Sinse when did kalling like it is a krime? Oh wait, Obama is blakk, so he must be a kriminal akkording to this bunt. I preferred these idiots when they wore hoods and burned krosses.

BenGleck October 27, 2012 at 12:15 pm

Your offended by that? How would you like your FUCKING EARS BURNED OFF?

FakaktaSouth October 25, 2012 at 2:55 pm

And there you have it, the Republican Party Platform.

sullivanst October 25, 2012 at 2:57 pm

Surprisingly enough, he and Newt Gingrich have been seen together.

prommie October 25, 2012 at 3:05 pm

I have a nephew who is not smart, but has some sort of wisdom I respect. he once said this to me: "Think about it, Pat, if you are smarter than me, thats it, I can't go there. So that means, I can't tell if you are just a little smarter than me, or if you are Einstein, because from where I am, you look the same." I think this explains a lot of the votes for the GOP. From where the morons sit, both Cheney and, for example, Clinton, are smarter than them, and they have no clue which one is smarter than the other, or which one is right.

prommie October 25, 2012 at 3:08 pm

You know you are right; in a country where 30% don't vote at all, you can win the election by appealing solely to the bottom half of the bell curve. Thats the some of the people that you can fool all the time.

hilacious October 25, 2012 at 7:10 pm

What about soup?

sullivanst October 25, 2012 at 7:27 pm

Gazpacho only, or something, maybe? I don't know.

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