Ghost Breitbart: Murdoch’s Wall Street Journal Now Part Of Obama’s Propaganda Machine

by Doktor Zoom

PonygandaHey guys! Did you know that there’s a vast left-wing conspiracy to cover up the TRVTH about what happened in Libya? Totally factual and documented — at least, inside what Wonkette’s BFF Rachel Maddow calls the conservative “media bubble where [there are no] neutral or contrasting points of view.” And so, when Rupert Murdoch’s Wall Street Journal, a press organ (huh-huh… “organ”) that is usually thought of as a reliable part of that bubble, runs a story falling outside the accepted conservative narrative about Benghazi, the only rational response is to declare the WSJ part of a pro-Obama spin campaign. Makes sense to us! Posting at Dead Andrew Breitbart’s Big Journalism site, AWR Hawkins says that the WSJ is one of many “Obama surrogates in the mainstream media” bent on “providing a smokescreen for U.S. Ambassador Susan Rice.”

Written in a way that admits the Obama administration’s story did change, the report creates a caveat by suggesting the change wasn’t official until weeks after Rice appeared Sunday news shows to blame the Benghazi attack on a YouTube video.

Moreover, the WSJ report pins the changing story on the intelligence community, thereby protecting Obama along with Rice.

Never mind that virtually every early report on a developing crisis contains errors and confusion (remember the reports of a car bomb at the State Department in DC on 9/11/01?), especially when the events happen on the other side of the planet. As Erich Lach points out in TPM, there’s nothing terribly new about any of this:

People with experience in intelligence and national security who spoke with TPM this week downplayed much of the debate. They said they see nothing unusual or nefarious in the official story having evolved over time. In fact, they said, it is all but expected that the first official account of a complex and fast-moving event will turn out to be wrong or incomplete.

“Sorting out what happened — in terms of the source of the attack, who knew what before the attack — is a very difficult, complicated, time-consuming process,” Vicki Divoll, former general counsel of the Senate Intelligence Committee, told TPM. “And it is legitimate for it to take several weeks or even longer before you have the answers you need.”

Clearly, the Obama Administration’s failure to be clairvoyant was a calculated disinformation campaign, not merely a matter of not having all the information available at their fingertips.

Breitbartard Hawkins speculates — and it would be irresponsible not to — that the WSJ story is part of a coordinated effort to skew perceptions of the Benghazi attack prior to tonight’s presidential debate on foreign policy:

Perhaps this will be Obama’s new tack for Oct 22 — It’s no longer Bush’s fault, but the fault of the intelligence community?

We kind of missed the part where Obama blamed GWB for Benghazi, but sure, why not? It’s an interesting comparison, though, considering how brilliantly George Bush followed up on intelligence reports with vague headings like “Bin Laden Determined To Strike in US.”

[TPM / Big Journalism, via Wonkville story miner NotThatDewey]

 
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{ 517 comments }

nounverb911 October 22, 2012 at 12:55 pm

Andrew Breitbart is still unavailable for comment.

LesBontemps October 22, 2012 at 12:56 pm

I've got sunshine on a cloudy day.

BaldarTFlagass October 22, 2012 at 1:14 pm

The wind beneath my wings.

sewollef October 22, 2012 at 1:20 pm

You fart from your armpits?

Awesome.

BaldarTFlagass October 22, 2012 at 1:28 pm

Makes my Old Spice doubly effective.

Goonemeritus October 22, 2012 at 1:10 pm

As time passes the decision of the Obama administration to clandestinely murder Andrew Breitbart seems more and more justified.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 1:18 pm

I'm so glad I got away with pinning the blame on them.

Generation[redacted] October 22, 2012 at 1:53 pm

I can't believe they fell for the old "Alcoholic dies of alcoholism" story.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 1:58 pm

Shhh! Don't spoil it now.

rmjagg October 22, 2012 at 1:44 pm

baggers are holding their breath until he does , hopefully

Generation[redacted] October 22, 2012 at 1:52 pm

When pressed* for a comment, Breitbart emitted a sound somewhat like, "Uuuuuuuuunnngh…"

(*pressed with enough force to compress the lungs.)

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 1:58 pm

Please don't stand on Andrew. It *ruins* your shoes.

WhatTheHolyHeck October 22, 2012 at 2:01 pm

"Dead Andrew Breitbart"

That just never gets old.

actor212 October 22, 2012 at 2:01 pm

Breitbart: You are DEAD to me!

FOX: Uhhhhhhhhhh, yea….about that….

rickmaci October 22, 2012 at 3:07 pm

Wingnuttery may die but the stench never leaves.

LibertyLover October 22, 2012 at 3:15 pm

And you can't get it off your shoes.

schvitzatura October 22, 2012 at 12:55 pm

Blowback, schmoback! When do we get to drop more high-ordnance munitions on uppity musselmen browns!

Esteev October 22, 2012 at 1:59 pm

Huzzah, my good man! Nothing invigorates like another war to be ignored!

AlterNewt October 22, 2012 at 12:55 pm

If everybody's in the tank for Obama, then who are all these other assholes?

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 1:19 pm

Duh, other assholes, obvy.

BlueMonkeh October 22, 2012 at 1:21 pm

REAL duhMERKuns. If you live in a red state, they're everywhere. And most of them are blazing assholes. Funny thing, though, the Omaha World Herald just came out in support of the Democrat candidate for congress in NE CD-2. They've been bootlicking the incumbent gop d-bag for the last 14 years and even they can't take him anymore. In red, suburban hell, the R-money/Lyin signs are littering the lawnscape. Oh, it's on like Donkey Kong (we're one of 2 households in the subdivision that are Dems and actually put up the signs to show it).

Lascauxcaveman October 22, 2012 at 1:34 pm

Omaha World Herald just came out in support of the Democrat candidate for congress in NE CD-2

I think you mean The OBAMA World Herald. They're in the tank! Just like Murdoch!

Gleem McShineys October 22, 2012 at 4:49 pm

Isn't odd how many things have been screeched at as being "In The Tank For Obama"?

If Mitt's such a great fucking candidate, why would it matter so much? Work the refs, much?

Its almost as if they are sooo close to admitting that yes, their candidate does suck ass, that anything, even a mildly disparaging comment, can disrupt the tenuous notion that he doesn't.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 8:36 pm

More to the point, if EVERYbody is in the tank for the other guy, doesn't that kinda suggest that the just MIGHT be something a mite wrongish about YOUR guy?

Loch_Nessosaur October 22, 2012 at 12:56 pm

conservative media bubble

Permanently stuck on the spin cycle.

Esteev October 22, 2012 at 1:57 pm

Needs moar brain bleach.

BaldarTFlagass October 22, 2012 at 12:56 pm

Remember those pictures of the helicopters on top of the US Embassy, Saigon, 1975? You know who was responsible for that debacle? That's right. Obama.

Loch_Nessosaur October 22, 2012 at 1:01 pm

He was just intercepting.

Estproph October 22, 2012 at 1:02 pm

Not only that, but Obama caused the North Koreans to cross the 38th parallel. We all know how that worked out.

ProgressiveInga October 22, 2012 at 1:04 pm

And Lance Armstrong, the dope cycling doper? Obama built that, too.

Generation[redacted] October 22, 2012 at 1:56 pm

Seven time Tour de Apologie world chapion.

SorosBot October 22, 2012 at 2:01 pm

I'm just glad they took his wins away; now they just have to do the same to all the other cyclists who took steroids, and justice will be served with the Tour de France having no winners in at least the past three decades as every single person who competed was on steroids, and everybody knew that, and acting all appalled at it is just ridiculous and stupid.

actor212 October 22, 2012 at 2:02 pm

JENS VOIGT LIBEL!

ProgressiveInga October 22, 2012 at 2:09 pm

Agreed. And the winners of the 1999-2005 Tours DF are…….
Beuller….
Beuller….
Beuller…..
Anyone…..
Anyone….
Anyone….

sullivanst October 22, 2012 at 4:11 pm

Probably noone, on account of all the podium finishers were using.

BoroPrimorac October 22, 2012 at 2:46 pm

Greg Lemond was clean..

Lascauxcaveman October 22, 2012 at 3:24 pm

Maybe. Probably? But I doubt Eddie Merckx was.

actor212 October 22, 2012 at 4:01 pm

Does lead count?

Also, there's the "iron" injections that Lance Armstrong alleges were actually PEDs.

And let's not forget that he technically "cheated" by using aero bars when no one else was (Fignon filed a protest, but was overruled).

Generation[redacted] October 22, 2012 at 3:13 pm

Don't forget the past several decades of baseball.

actor212 October 22, 2012 at 4:10 pm

Every professional sport.

Any time big money is on the table, you can guarantee someone is cheating to get a bigger slice of the pie. Every. Time.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 1:20 pm

I have it on good authority that Obama murdered Norodom Sihanouk.

OneDollarJuana October 22, 2012 at 1:22 pm

Obama knows where Jimmy Hoffa is buried. And he still has the shovel.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 1:34 pm

Sneaky bastard, ain't he? Probly kept the shovel so we'd think he was dumb.

Lascauxcaveman October 22, 2012 at 1:36 pm

And you know why the Great Pumpkin never came to Linus' pumpkin patch, even though it was clearly the most sincere pumpkin patch…

Esteev October 22, 2012 at 1:55 pm

Did Obama make a delicious pie with it? That bastard.

Lionel[redacted]Esq October 22, 2012 at 1:56 pm

Obama was also behind the Lufthansa heist. And made sure no one lived to tie him to it.

Esteev October 22, 2012 at 2:07 pm

Also, too, Obama being the real DB Cooper is a well-known, historical fact.

Generation[redacted] October 22, 2012 at 3:18 pm

I love that scene where Obama shoots the driver, and then tells Biden, "Make that coffee to go."

Mittaplasia October 22, 2012 at 1:59 pm

Shovel-ready jobs! I remember that!

Lionel[redacted]Esq October 22, 2012 at 1:24 pm

If Obama had shown greater leadership in the War of 1812, Canada would be ours!

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 1:35 pm

If not for Obama, Constantinople would never have been destroyed.

Lionel[redacted]Esq October 22, 2012 at 1:40 pm

Duh. Someone had to let the Muslims into the city.

PsycWench October 22, 2012 at 2:22 pm

If Obama had shown greater leadership at the onset of the Spanish Flu Epidemic of 1918ish, millions of lives would have been saved. (He's responsible for the American AND European deaths, plus the children, grandchildren etc that would have been born had their ancestors not died at age 17).

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 2:26 pm

Mein gott in himmel! He has the blood of BILLIONS on his hands! The greatest mass-murderer EVAH!

emmelemm October 22, 2012 at 3:38 pm

History's true greatest monster revealed!

Dudleydidwrong October 22, 2012 at 2:35 pm

That's nothing. I read on the Intertubes that Obama spread the Black Plague all over Europe people in the 14th century. That killed more than 100 million. If they were alive today Obama would never have won the election in 2008.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 2:50 pm

Figures. He's half-Black.

sullivanst October 22, 2012 at 4:36 pm

Finally, the identity of Woodrow Wilson's attempted murderer is revealed!

SorosBot October 22, 2012 at 1:24 pm

And here I thought that, in wingnut-land, that was the fault of the hippies and Walter Cronkite; John Kerry also.

sullivanst October 22, 2012 at 1:32 pm

But mostly Jane Fonda. Much easier to hate-fap to her, although perhaps not for certain Republicans.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 1:36 pm

Well, she *is* one of that inferior species – wimminz.

Steverino247 October 22, 2012 at 1:37 pm

The chopper wasn't atop the embassy, but it was close enough for the story to stick. When a friend deployed to Afghanistan I made up a "pass" for him with a picture of Obama and Obama's signature cut-and-pasted below this statement: The bearer is authorized one seat aboard any helicopter leaving Kabul."

Esteev October 22, 2012 at 1:56 pm

If it weren't for Obama, we would have totally solved world hunger.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 2:00 pm

Actually, that one's my fault. If I could just stop eating …

C_R_Eature October 22, 2012 at 7:28 pm

Haven't you run out of neighbors yet?

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 7:38 pm

Dood. (glowers at the CREature reproachfully) If I was eating *them,* we'd have *solved* world hunger.

SorosBot October 22, 2012 at 2:04 pm

He's standing in the way of the conservative solution to hunger, starvation.

actor212 October 22, 2012 at 2:22 pm

And then Soylent Green swoops into solve the problem!

Free Markit RULEZ!

Esteev October 22, 2012 at 3:10 pm

At least they have a solution.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 3:33 pm

One per cent.

SnarkOff October 22, 2012 at 2:38 pm

Obama totally ate the frozen burrito I was saving for my lunch.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 2:51 pm

I hear he drank John McCain's milk shake too.

actor212 October 22, 2012 at 2:54 pm

BARACK OBAMA STOLED MY SHOE!

mille derps October 22, 2012 at 3:37 pm

That Keyser Söze character ain't got nothin' on Obama…

Radiotherapy October 22, 2012 at 4:53 pm

The Yemen Embassy Attack in '08. During the Campaign? HENNGH. ??!?

natl_[redacted]_cmdr October 22, 2012 at 8:07 pm

Obama to Dorothy:
"I'll get you my pretty! And your little dog too!"

noodlesalad October 22, 2012 at 12:56 pm

Gosh, the conservatariat gets itself so worked up over the deaths of four brave American diplomats and security officials. Imagine what they'll do when they find out that the administration stove-piped intelligence from unreliable sources to start a war that killed over four THOUSAND American soldiers!

BaldarTFlagass October 22, 2012 at 12:58 pm

No way that kind of shit would happen in a Republican administration, believe you me, nosireebob.

mrpuma2u October 22, 2012 at 1:00 pm

They will have to activate many reservists from the fighting keyboarders 404th rapid response division. Those guys will invent the right truth, and then get it out there.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 1:21 pm

The 101st Chairborne is on it.

noodlesalad October 22, 2012 at 1:22 pm

Simper Fi!

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 1:36 pm

Oh, you know them too?

Blueb4sinrise October 22, 2012 at 1:16 pm

Not in the history book they're currently working on.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 1:21 pm

And you would know about this how, HENNNNGGGGHHH????

Blueb4sinrise October 22, 2012 at 1:39 pm
MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 2:01 pm

I want one too.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 1:20 pm

Well, as long as it was OBUMMER doing it, our fellow citizens could believe it.

noodlesalad October 22, 2012 at 1:22 pm

Give them another 4 years and Obama will be responsible not only for the origin of the Iraq War, but also Vietnam, Korea, and possibly the XYZ affair.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 1:37 pm

They're ready to pin the engulfment of the First Amoeba on the dude, by now.

Yellerdawg October 22, 2012 at 2:27 pm

Would that be engulfment war I?

sullivanst October 22, 2012 at 3:23 pm

Whilst continuing to deny that evolution is real or that the earth is older than 6,000 years, of course.

deanbooth October 22, 2012 at 12:57 pm

Mr. Bubble? You're soaking in it!

Biel_ze_Bubba October 22, 2012 at 3:07 pm

Having soaked in tons of that stuff as a kid — whatever the heck it was made of — I approve this message.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 3:10 pm

When Biely approves your message, you're in a divil of a pother.

sudsmckenzie October 22, 2012 at 12:57 pm

What were they thinking? Its like "white" on Susan Rice.

ManchuCandidate October 22, 2012 at 12:58 pm

OMG THEY SAID SOMETHING REASONABLE AND FACTUAL ABOUT THE KENYAN!!! BURN THEM!! BURN THEM ALLL!!!!! THEIR WITCHES (SIC)!!! WITCHES!!!!

I've known Raiders fans who have shown more reason and tolerance of San Diego than any Bitparter has toward Obamer.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 1:23 pm

If he wins, there will be an epidemic of mental health disasters across the nation. Missourah, Arkinsaw, Miz'sippeh, and them states might need emergency FEMA internment.

HistoriCat October 22, 2012 at 1:54 pm

OK, so NOW can we start those FEMA camps?

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 2:02 pm

A nod's as good as a wink to a blind man!

sullivanst October 22, 2012 at 3:12 pm

Say no more!

Steverino247 October 22, 2012 at 1:39 pm

Were those Raider fans sober at the showing?

SnarkOff October 22, 2012 at 2:41 pm

I am still pissed about the Raiders winning the 1980 AFC Championship game. Dammit.

Antispandex October 22, 2012 at 3:35 pm

Not to worry! It will never happen again!

Estproph October 22, 2012 at 12:58 pm

I've never been to the Big Government site, or any Breitbart site. I'm not sure I understand how they put their pages up – how do you use the internet to write in crayon?

T3rbo October 22, 2012 at 1:17 pm

just scream at the crayon as loud as you can, in cliches

Estproph October 22, 2012 at 1:20 pm

"STOP CARTOONING PEOPLE! STOP CARTOONING PEOPLE!"

UnholyMoses October 22, 2012 at 1:33 pm

Crayon is easy.

Getting all those Big Chief tablet pages into the computer is the really hard part …

actor212 October 22, 2012 at 2:23 pm

Comic Sans, silly.

nounverb911 October 22, 2012 at 12:58 pm

Isn't Rafalca from Eastquestria?

Lionel[redacted]Esq October 22, 2012 at 1:25 pm

She is the head of Romney's Foreign Policy staff. After all, she has been to England.

UW8316154 October 22, 2012 at 1:45 pm

And even managed to do a marginally better job while she was there than Mittens did.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 2:06 pm

She certainly produced far less horseshit.

Generation[redacted] October 22, 2012 at 2:25 pm

President Romney's first appointment to the Senate.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 2:28 pm

Little Boots set the historical precedent.

Jukesgrrl October 22, 2012 at 3:57 pm

Rafalca really belongs in the Supreme Court. One foot clop for NO, two for YES. And no need to think — just do as Clarence does. Copy Alito for decisions and have a clerk write the opinions.

Biel_ze_Bubba October 22, 2012 at 3:08 pm

Haven't we always been at war with Eastquestria?

weejee October 22, 2012 at 12:59 pm

Obama blamed GWB for Benghazi

That would be a shocker. Seems clear that the compromiser, and election stealer, Rutherford B. Hayes' zombie fingerprints were all over it.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 1:24 pm

I love you, Weejee, because you always know WHOM to blame.

Wut? I would never even have THOUGHT of Rutherford B. Hayes.

MissTaken October 22, 2012 at 12:59 pm

W was the bestest President #1 because when he say Saddam Hussein haz those nasty WMDs that waz all twew! Yup!

SorosBot October 22, 2012 at 1:08 pm

But he totally proved himself to be a tougher man, and therefore a better President, than Daddy! Silly H.W., thinking that conquering Iraq would create a clusterfuck of a quagmire that would destabilize the region and go on for years, costing way too many lives!

Reginald_Perrin October 22, 2012 at 12:59 pm

The Breitfart piece was written by AWR Hawkins, does AWR stand for alternate wingnut reality?

Lucidamente1 October 22, 2012 at 1:02 pm

I though it was Asswipe Researcher.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 1:25 pm

On second thought …

EatsBabyDingos October 22, 2012 at 1:03 pm

"Sadie"

Doktor Zoom October 22, 2012 at 1:03 pm

I honestly thought it was "Awr Hawkins" until I looked it up…

FlownOver October 22, 2012 at 1:58 pm

As in "Awr, go fuck yourself."

Biel_ze_Bubba October 22, 2012 at 3:10 pm

"Awrrrr" is pretty much like "durrrr".

ph7 October 22, 2012 at 1:04 pm

Absolutely Without Reason

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 1:26 pm

Dammit! Too many choices, and I like them ALL.

Lascauxcaveman October 22, 2012 at 1:41 pm

Use a different one each time you think of him. Which isn't often, I hope.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 2:07 pm

Fortunately, I have dead skin to remove from my feeties today, so, no.

Estproph October 22, 2012 at 1:04 pm

Why yes, yes it does.

MissTaken October 22, 2012 at 1:04 pm

A White Republican?

ProgressiveInga October 22, 2012 at 1:07 pm

Department of Redundancy Department.

SorosBot October 22, 2012 at 1:23 pm

Now, there are a few self-hating black and brown people in the GOP. Not many, but a handful.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 1:26 pm

Yeah, if a hand has only three fingies.

ChillBill October 22, 2012 at 1:10 pm

All-Wingnut, Retarded.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 1:24 pm

I knew SUMbuddy would figure it out eventually.

SoBeach October 22, 2012 at 12:59 pm

The hysterical ninnies on the right are going to keep flogging this Libya non-issue until everyone agrees that it completely negates the whole "killed bin Laden" thing. Or until the election is over. It is literally all they've got when it comes to foreign policy.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 1:27 pm

I suspect the election will be over by the time they drop it. It's just not catching fire. Although their pantalones certainly are.

fuflans October 22, 2012 at 8:17 pm

this is EXACTLY what mr fuflans said during the romney faceplant that was last week's informed debate on this topic.

ChillBill October 22, 2012 at 12:59 pm

WHAT? Those Breitbart sites sill exist?

SayItWithWookies October 22, 2012 at 1:19 pm

It's proof that after the body dies the soullessness lives on.

LesBontemps October 22, 2012 at 1:27 pm

The evil that men do lives after them, and in this case, in spades.

HistoriCat October 22, 2012 at 1:57 pm

Andrew was more clever than he thought – he wanted those sites to live on so that we could see he was smart one in the group …

Mittaplasia October 22, 2012 at 2:07 pm

Brought to you by the Walking Dead.

Lucidamente1 October 22, 2012 at 1:00 pm

"Hey kid, you wanna see a real press organ?"
—Breitbart to intern Riley, ca. 2010

Cicada October 22, 2012 at 1:17 pm

Poor Riley is still on medication to stop the flashbacks.

actor212 October 22, 2012 at 4:21 pm

I was just thinking that he could go on to discover a cure for cancer or solve the Middle East crisis, but the instant his name comes up in the news, Wonkette will put up that one photo again.

Lucidamente1 October 22, 2012 at 4:57 pm

You fuck one goat . . . , you get groped by one Breitbart . . .

Chet Kincaid_ October 22, 2012 at 1:20 pm

"Would you like to see my collection of State Department cables back at my place?"

Generation[redacted] October 22, 2012 at 2:01 pm

"We'll have some Jesus Juice and I'll show you some intercepted cell phone pictures."

BaldarTFlagass October 22, 2012 at 1:00 pm

Like joining the military, employment with the State Department entails some risk. I'm sure the ambassador and every one else in the consulate was aware of that when they hired on.

Steverino247 October 22, 2012 at 1:40 pm

They were more aware of it than anyone posting at Big Government.

rickmaci October 22, 2012 at 3:10 pm

Risk yes. Dead? Not so much.

Biel_ze_Bubba October 22, 2012 at 3:11 pm

That really was less than optimal.

mrblifil October 22, 2012 at 1:01 pm

This is why the master's death was such a blow to the organization. Dick Pix or GTFO!

SayItWithWookies October 22, 2012 at 1:02 pm

The Breitbart world — where Politico is a filthy left-wing propaganda machine and Rupert Murdoch is a sinister Obama apologist fifth-columnist and probably a Soviet spy. Welcome to your new groupies, Mitt!

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 1:30 pm

Will he fall apart tonight? I'm hoping for the spectacular meltdown that Dumbya denied me. Head rotating, steam coming from both ears, a high-pitched, electronic "EEEEEE!" and bolts and sprockets showering the stage.

Everybody stocked up on booze and snax?

Esteev October 22, 2012 at 1:37 pm

I have poked out my eyes and perforated my ear drums with enthusiasm!

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 1:40 pm

I can't not watch. I just hope I can stay calm enough to survive the fucking thing.

Esteev October 22, 2012 at 1:51 pm

I like to listen to it on the radio. I can't look at Mitt "Mitt" Romney without my blood pressure rising. Hence, it's medicinal.

SayItWithWookies October 22, 2012 at 1:55 pm

I think if Mitt has a meltdown it'll be more of the spoiled child who didn't get his way sort that looked like it was about to materialize in the last debate. If he's teased and prodded and contradicted enough it might come through. Me, I'm buying extra alcohol because one never knows.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 2:10 pm

I have EIGHT FUCKING BOTTLES OF WINE and I'll drink them all if I have to. I just wish I could calm down.

DCBloom October 22, 2012 at 2:46 pm

Last debate, I had to rub hubby's neck during the whole thing just to keep the blood pressure at a reasonable level. That, a bottle of wine, and a great performance by our Potus got us though…. just breathe deep. It'll all be over in a couple of weeks.

sullivanst October 22, 2012 at 4:09 pm

Although, given how terribly little he knows of foreign affairs, how horribly wrong all of his instincts on the subject are, if the spoiled child throws a tantrum, it could be a completely incoherent babbling tantrum. Again, we saw that for a while last week, after Candy had corrected him he was barely coherent for the next several minutes.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 4:18 pm

Yabada hammana bloog splort glif ahba dabba ah ha I donubudda hammana blorg splat.

Tonight's Romneysponse, if my jinxin's works!

rocktonsam October 22, 2012 at 1:03 pm

needs moar smoke screen, i CAN'T SEE SHIT!

Doktor Zoom October 22, 2012 at 1:12 pm

I can't see shit twice!

BaldarTFlagass October 22, 2012 at 1:17 pm

I say everything twice!

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 1:30 pm

I shit twice, and now I can't see!

EatsBabyDingos October 22, 2012 at 1:04 pm

I'd swim in Turtle Bay with Susan Rice. ROWR.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 1:31 pm

I'd rather swim in Susan's Bay.

Lascauxcaveman October 22, 2012 at 1:46 pm

Please reassure me she's not related to Condi.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 2:10 pm

Only in that Condi is believed to be of the same species.

EatsBabyDingos October 22, 2012 at 2:12 pm

One is "Brown Rice" and the other is "Wild Rice."

Maman October 22, 2012 at 1:05 pm

Sounds like Rupert is hedging his bets.

sullivanst October 22, 2012 at 1:16 pm

Nah. This is from the news section of the Journal, which still makes some kind of effort to hew to the facts, so that when the wingnuts blast-email editorials from the extreme rightwing cesspool opinion section, they can claim that it's the same source as the "trusted" WSJ news.

Lionel[redacted]Esq October 22, 2012 at 1:27 pm

I am becoming more and more convinced that the WSJ editorial board is a branch of the Onion.

Jukesgrrl October 22, 2012 at 4:03 pm

And they've relocated to Montgomery, Alabama.

SorosBot October 22, 2012 at 1:05 pm

I'm still not sure what the conspiracy over Benghazi was supposed to entail. So the Obama administration what, overestimated the relevance of the stupid youtube video in making the attackers angry? And/or they didn't use the word "terrorism" soon enough (even though he actually did so immediately after the attack)?

Huh? How is this supposed to be an issue at all, much less damning to the administration? I don't get it.

MissTaken October 22, 2012 at 1:10 pm

I *think* it stems from the righties still being butthurt that we didn't go in and bomb the shit out of Libya with a full war led by America, Fuck Yeah!®. Instead we pussied out and supported the boring and lame commie/socialist UN last year. Had we just nuked Libya back to the stone age none of those nasty brown Libyan people would be alive to attack the consulate a year later.

SorosBot October 22, 2012 at 1:20 pm

Funny that at the time, Obama aiding the rebels against Gaddafi was a horrible misuse of the military. Then after the fact it became that he didn't do enough, and shouldn't have let our hated ally France take the lead for some reason.

Just like when Clinton bombed the Serbs to stop the genocide of the Kosovars, or went after that bin Laden fellow after his group (Al something?) bombed one of our embassies, it was a great misuse of power and "wagging the dog". It's almost as if use of military force is only legitimate when the President is Republican.

MissTaken October 22, 2012 at 1:39 pm

Clinton was the World's Policeman Who Got a Blowjob. BUT everything changed after 9/11 so stomping around the world screaming about terrorism is A-OK now because He Who Got A Blowjob was not President on 9/11.

SorosBot October 22, 2012 at 1:48 pm

And getting a blowjob in the Oval Office is the most demeaning thing any President has ever done to America; it certainly was not just petty revenge for Nixon's forced resignation even though he was an actual crook.

Chet Kincaid_ October 22, 2012 at 1:39 pm

Yes, they are almost as all-over-the-place with Libya criticism as Ken Layne was in these very pages! (What, don't you get the Wonkette print edition?!)

Lascauxcaveman October 22, 2012 at 1:52 pm

I'd almost forgotten that. I think that ol' worrywart Ken believed 'Bams was maybe going to send troops into Libya, next. He was certainly all up in the Prez's grille for awhile, wasn't he?

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 1:46 pm

The "genocide of the Kosovars" has, as you know, roots in some very ancient history. It's not as simple as "the rotten Serbs fell upon and massacred the poor Muslim Kosovars." It's all part of the fallout of the collapse of the Osmanliye empire.

HistoriCat October 22, 2012 at 2:03 pm

It's almost as if (the) use of military force is only legitimate when the President is Republican.

Fixed that for you.

weejee October 22, 2012 at 2:05 pm

Double thumbs up and lotsa GO 'p' for U.

Estproph October 22, 2012 at 1:22 pm

This.

If we'd just do our job and conquer the rest of the world, then we wouldn't have to worry about terrorism or selling enough Big Macs ever again. But that lazy sumbich Obummer won't do it.

Jukesgrrl October 22, 2012 at 4:07 pm

You gotta problem with Global Manifest Destiny© and its Golden Arches©?

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 4:19 pm

Do you know what it feels like to read this after reading the history of colonialization for two years?

Doktor Zoom October 22, 2012 at 1:11 pm

I just assume that it's an attempt to deflect attention from Mitt's insane "Obama sympathizes with the attackers" press release. The real scandal is that the administration — like virtually everyone in the west, including conservatives — initially conflated the motivation for Benghazi with the now clearly-unrelated riot in Cairo, which was in fact about the "Innocence of Muslims" video.

sullivanst October 22, 2012 at 1:25 pm

While the actual riot in Cairo was clearly unrelated, it's still very far from clear that Mitt's continuing blind insistence that the attack in Benghazi had "nothing to do" with the video is anything close to true, what with the numerous eyewitness reports that the attackers had said they were motivated by the video, and the Reuters and NYTimes interviews with one of the leading participants in the attack both reference the video as motivation for it.

Chow Yun Flat October 22, 2012 at 1:31 pm

I don't think that looking at the riots/attacks in Cairo and Benghazi in real time and getting it wrong is as scandalous as sticking to that story as the situations became more clear.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 1:48 pm

It's not entirely clear that the riot was unrelated. Muslims all over the world have been protesting that stupid video. I'd like to see Joseph Nasrallah and Nakoula Bassely spend a LONG time in jail over this.

MilwaukeeKent October 22, 2012 at 5:08 pm

The right insists that no one ever saw this imaginary video. The trailer is all that's made it out there, I think. It's been out there for months on YouTube but the night before riots in Cairo and 20 other cities in the Middle East and Europe, it was shown on a very popular program on Egyptian TV and been discussed by the BBC.
The militia in Benghazi that did this is one of those weird Middle Eastern hybrid political party-social service agency — militias. Gun Room behind the Day Care at HQ, so to speak. They got pissed about the video and carried out the attack. The right are idiots to continue drilling on these points. It's BOTH an organized attack and in response to the video. It doesn't take much, there're always guys hanging around ready to rumble down at the biker clubhouse.

T3rbo October 22, 2012 at 1:23 pm

It's all they have, and they are going to keep pretending that this issue is something anyone but them cares about. As a regular 'merican, I tend to believe that the people responsible for the deaths in Bengazi are…the people who assaulted the compound with machine guns and rocket propelled grenades. Would twelve more guards have been able to stop this? Probably not, I don't know. Did it take four hours to repel this assault? Yep. Would the Ambassador still be alive if we did something different? Perhaps.
To me, at the end of the day, I blame the people who set fire to the compound for the deaths of those who died in that fire. Of course, none of this will come up tonight. Romney will pretend that Obama should have mounted flamethrowers on the ramparts of the compound, and Obama will pretend that he should keep addressing this issue, and Americans who are undecided will habitually check Facebook during the whole thing. It's just an attempt to run out the clock and keep Obama from scoring any more points.

Generation[redacted] October 22, 2012 at 2:29 pm

If Obama had just decided let bin laden get away, Republicans wouldn't have to concentrate on this one event.

Jukesgrrl October 22, 2012 at 4:11 pm

"It's just an attempt to run out the clock and keep Obama from scoring any more points." Of course. Didn't you hear the two-minute warning whistle?

Lionel[redacted]Esq October 22, 2012 at 1:29 pm

To me, the interesting thing is that to make all the Conservative paranoid theories work, you have to ignore that there were a bunch of protests about the video that day.

Maybe Obama staged all of those so that he could try to cover up Libya for two weeks?

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 1:44 pm

They're trying to get the meme started that Obama is as weak on foreign policy as he is on domestic. However, due to their non-stop obstructionism in Congress, they've basically made it possible for Obama to shine on the foreign policy issues. The meme isn't catching on. They're telling the American people he's an apologist who is bullied by world powers and has no handle on foreign policy. They're trying to link the entire Arab Spring, al-Qaeda, the recent riots over the video, and events in Libya and Syria to show that he is weak and the Muslims (our sworn enemies forever as of this decade) do not fear him, as they would fear Romney.

It ain't working. That's why it sounds so scattered and piss-poor.

SorosBot October 22, 2012 at 1:51 pm

Well of course Obama is weak against the terrorist enemies; that's why Osama bin Laden is shipping champagne in Kabul today.

weejee October 22, 2012 at 2:08 pm

With ace Tripoli pirate Hayreddin Barbarossa?

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 2:14 pm

Thank you, Weejee! You're FULL of good gifts today. I did not know about this fellow.

Biff October 22, 2012 at 6:58 pm

I loved Jane Fonda as Barbarossa!

Jukesgrrl October 22, 2012 at 4:13 pm

The Democrats ace in the hole … the 99% REALLY don't want another war.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 4:21 pm

Neither do most Israelis. If enough of us beat the shit out of the GOP and Likudniks on this, we may have peace for a couple of years.

natl_[redacted]_cmdr October 22, 2012 at 8:21 pm

I got this, SorosBot:

They're fuckin' nuts threatened by the strong blah man in the White House and they are grasping for straws.

There.

DoucheWillis October 22, 2012 at 1:06 pm

Hey, why does Fluttershy get double exposure here? Pinkie Pie all day erryday bitches.

Chow Yun Flat October 22, 2012 at 1:06 pm

People with experience in intelligence and national security

Not Breitbart

a very difficult, complicated, time-consuming process

Definitely not Brietbart

they see nothing unusual or nefarious in the official story having evolved over time.

Never in a million years Brietbart

smitallica October 22, 2012 at 1:08 pm

Yes, and we all know how the Wall Street Journal is totally in the tank for Obama.

Esteev October 22, 2012 at 1:34 pm

Totally! I mean "journal" even has an O in it!

prommie October 22, 2012 at 1:10 pm

Paranoia strikes deep
into your heart it will creep
it starts when you're always afraid.

Now I get it.

Lionel[redacted]Esq October 22, 2012 at 1:31 pm

Dr. Dr. help me please, I know you'll understand
There's a time device inside of me, Im a self-destructin man
There's a red, under my bed
And there's a little green man in my head
And he said, you're not goin crazy, you're just a bit sad
Cause there's a man in ya, knawin ya, tearin ya into two.

Silly boy ya self-destroyer.
Paranoia, the destroyer

prommie October 22, 2012 at 1:56 pm

Kinky!

Toomush_Infer October 22, 2012 at 2:49 pm

There's a Bob on the Dole over there…..sorry…..

FakaktaSouth October 22, 2012 at 1:43 pm

stop, hey, what's that sound? dead andrew breitbart on the ground.
I know I know, boo.
whatever. But you got this damned song stuck in my head, so, not my fault.

prommie October 22, 2012 at 1:56 pm

That song is nothing compared to the things you got stuck in my head so you quit complaining.

Chet Kincaid_ October 22, 2012 at 2:05 pm

Bright Bart is standing at the Infinite Blackboard of Hell writing "I will not lie on the President" with a fingernail-sized piece of chalk forever. Demons are clapping eraser dust just to keep him motivated.

prommie October 22, 2012 at 2:32 pm

And just imagine that screaching wince-inducing constant "screeee" that piece of chalk is making and is transmitting through his fingers to his bones! Yay, Andrew! Hey, what do you call one conservative bloviator dropping dead of a sudden massive coronary? A good start.

Chet Kincaid_ October 22, 2012 at 2:35 pm

The demons are perpetually screaming "behaaave yourself!!" in his face, also.

Rotundo_ October 22, 2012 at 5:02 pm

And not a drop of booze to be had.

Generation[redacted] October 22, 2012 at 2:31 pm

There's a man with a blog over there
Tellin' me, I've got to beware.

James Michael Curley October 22, 2012 at 2:51 pm

"For what its worth" by the Buffalo Springfield and "We Gotta Get out of This Place" by the Animals were absolutely necessary on any play list in Vietnam if that South East Asian band wanted to hold the audience. In a few EM clubs they risked getting out alive if they didn't play "We Gotta Get out of This Place"

Oh! and long pornographic versions of "Gloria" with the female dancers demonstrating some of the lyrics.

prommie October 22, 2012 at 3:10 pm

You are old. That helps me narrow down the field of people you might be.

James Michael Curley October 22, 2012 at 3:41 pm

I don't think you understand. I didn't come to rescue Rambo from you. I came here to rescue you from him.

WhatTheHeck October 22, 2012 at 4:24 pm

Richard Crenna libel.

Allmighty_Manos October 22, 2012 at 1:10 pm

Nov. 7 at Big Journalism: "Who's Benghazi again?"

FNMA October 22, 2012 at 2:41 pm

Benghazi? He was great in The Big Lebowski.

calliecallie October 22, 2012 at 3:08 pm

Isn't Ben Ghazi Brazilian?

Generation[redacted] October 22, 2012 at 3:32 pm

Brazilian? That's a lot of Ben Ghazis!

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 4:22 pm

No, you're thinking of Ben Gazzara.

sullivanst October 22, 2012 at 1:11 pm

The GOP/Romney line of attack still remains that Obama didn't personally wade in, guns blazing, long before the facts could possibly be discerned. Romney, on the other hand, showed true leadership by politicizing the attacks before they were even finished, and making numerous gross and significant errors of fact in doing so.

Seriously, Romney's foreign policy rhetoric is quite the most disgusting thing about his campaign: going very far out of its way at every semblance of a possibility to attack the President on what invariably turn out to be completely baseless grounds, but unable to cite any policy positions on which they differ from what Obama has been doing (although usually revealing this in the form of "Obama should've done x, y and z" when that's exactly what he's done already). In the best case, a President Romney's foreign policy would be to do what Obama's been doing, except be a total dick to everyone in public, constantly. In the worst case, his instinct to ask the Cheneyites first would have us in multiple new shooting wars within his first year.

In other, truly important, news, Andrew Breitbart is still dead.

T3rbo October 22, 2012 at 1:36 pm

Yep, this whole non issue is designed to take the focus away from Romney's total lack of foreign policy chops. He can only say "BOMB IRAN!!1" so many times in a row, so he has to stretch Bengazi into a two hour expose in order to keep the ball out of Obama's hands. Obama, if he were smart, would briefly address the issue, call Mitt out for repeatedly politicizing the issue, and move on in about three minutes.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 1:50 pm

See, now, that last part really warms the cockles of my heart.

sullivanst October 22, 2012 at 2:59 pm

Hurhur… cockles hurhurhur…

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 3:23 pm

Et tu, Sully? Et TU, YOU BRUTE???

FakaktaSouth October 22, 2012 at 1:11 pm

This is all part of what I hate about these people. Just nonsense. It's all just nonsense to fit a narrative, facts don't matter, actual findings don't, dead people in a sad tragedy don't, it's just all fodder for their need to say stupid shit. I hate them. The idea that these fucktards would go so far as to ever accuse the WSJ or ANY bullshit news org that doesn't tow the "whatever the Pres did was wrong, even if it wasn't " line means they are somehow wrong (Even if I think most all of what Rupert sells is EGREGIOUSLY EVIL) makes me furious. These assholes can just shut the hell up.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 1:52 pm

I love you because I can sit here all calm and let you be shrieky and ragey for me.

prommie October 22, 2012 at 2:41 pm

Its impossible not to love her, in my experience.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 2:57 pm

True.

102415 October 22, 2012 at 1:13 pm

Well, actually, a lot of wall street types I know were hoping to continue doing well and we all know what happens as soon as Mitt gets his Mitts on things.Pretty soon it's not the 1% it's the 15 or twenty.

SorosBot October 22, 2012 at 1:17 pm

Yeah, the Wall Streeters are doing just great under the Obama recovery, but see he doesn't kiss their asses enough which means he HATES CAPITALISM and is THE WORST PRESIDENT FOR JOB CREATORS™ EVAR!!

LesBontemps October 22, 2012 at 1:13 pm

IMPEeACHH!!!!!11!!11!

gullywompr October 22, 2012 at 1:18 pm

So, here's the deal on the 9/11 State Department car bomb story: After the attacks, the State Department building was evacuated, but of course so was the rest of DC, so there was a huge traffic gridlock, which meant that people could do little more than stand around outside and speculate with each other about what might have happened, and nobody was immune from this. Two guards were having a conversation, and a reporter was eavesdropping nearby, hoping to get a scoop (you should have seen how excited some people were that day, many seemed more hopped up on an adrenaline rush than they were terrified). While they were talking, a propane tank over at the Pentagon exploded as a result of the fire there, and was heard across the river at DoS. Of course, one guard asked the other what that explosion sound was, to which the other replied something like "I don't know, maybe it was a car bomb", and the intrepid reporter (unknown) had his scoop, and phoned it in (how he managed to do that is a mystery – I couldn't get through for hours). Blame the lamestream media for that one.

Gumboz1953 October 22, 2012 at 3:55 pm

I work at State and did on 9/11. After I got my car from the GW garage, I was driving back down 23rd and was abeam the State Department when I heard about the "car bomb." I looked at the building, intact and bomb-less, and said, "really?" Then maneuvered to get home as fast as I could, before all my relatives around the country (including my elderly father) had heart attacks. My teenage son, walking the Appalachian Trail (south to north)called me from the woods of Vermont to make sure I was still alive after the horrible car bomb. God I hate the 24 hour news cycle — nothing verified. Hate it even more now.

gullywompr October 22, 2012 at 4:40 pm

But we did get hit with Anthrax shortly after.

At least we're not in Southwest Asia…

johnnyzhivago October 22, 2012 at 1:20 pm

And Liberal/Commie Wall Street Journal is owned by Dow Jones (which is owned by socialist Murdoch) so can we REALLY trust the Dow Jones Average???

LesBontemps October 22, 2012 at 1:31 pm

And why isn't it the Dow Jones Exceptional?

MissTaken October 22, 2012 at 1:44 pm

The Dow Jones average is a stupid index that no one really uses. It's only 30 companies that are deemed indicative of the market as a whole, but I don't go to parties with McDonald's and Wal-Mart 2 of the 30 people invited.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 1:54 pm

No one but the press who spasm over every movement of those imaginary numbers and pass those spasms on to the ill-informed multitudes. Today is an extra-hatey stabby day. I wish to hate and stab all those motherfuckers. With, um, votes.

Biff October 22, 2012 at 7:13 pm

I was so much happier when all I knew about Dow Jones was what I heard in a song…

barto October 22, 2012 at 1:22 pm

Never fear, ghost of Breitbart, for there will certainly be plenty of WSJ editorials excoriating BO for the Benghazi events – the editors never read the actual stories in the paper.

Mittens Howell, III October 22, 2012 at 1:23 pm

This is all a decoy. Romney is planning to ignore Libya and go for the jugular by NAILING Obama on his inadequate plans for dealing with the U.S.S.R.

pdiddycornchips October 22, 2012 at 1:37 pm

Is that before or after he starts a trade war with China that costs his hedge fund buddies billions? Or will he call Bibi and ask him what he wants him to do?

jodyleek October 22, 2012 at 1:40 pm

Don't forget Poland!

weejee October 22, 2012 at 1:23 pm

That was strange. At least here, my entire IntenseDebased account vanished, but not my pee. Avatar, posts, went poof. Then came back shazaaam. Something weird going on here on the ides of Cocktober. Rmoney videos from Gloria Allred in 3,2,1???

Lionel[redacted]Esq October 22, 2012 at 1:33 pm

Obama has figured out that Wonkette is getting close to the truth. Drone strikes on all commenteers within the hour!

One_who_wanders October 22, 2012 at 1:46 pm

I guess I can stop working on this project, in that case.

I dropped two p-points one day last week and still haven't made up the ground. Not that I obsess or anything.

HistoriCat October 22, 2012 at 2:16 pm

Are you on one of my projects? Stop goofing off – that's my job!

Jukesgrrl October 22, 2012 at 4:21 pm

A couple of years ago we endured the Great Re-setting of P. That was back in the dark ages when Thumbs Down also existed. Of course it was a Soshulist Conspiracy designed to make us all appear equal, when we know we're not.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 1:55 pm

Allred denies the rumours. I have begun praying to a deity in whom I do not believe.

Redgyal October 22, 2012 at 1:25 pm

Seriously those Newsmax headlines on the side are getting really stupid and redundant.

jesus_vs_gojira October 22, 2012 at 1:25 pm

Then Obama made a spoof video where he looked under the table for the missing anti-Muslim video. Ha ha, good one!

Mittens Howell, III October 22, 2012 at 1:25 pm

I vote for the saucy little red haired pony!

larrykat October 22, 2012 at 1:27 pm

What, is Wonkette now screening posts like the goddamn Huffington Post?

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 1:56 pm

Did you get a weird message about needing to be approved by an admin?

larrykat October 22, 2012 at 2:01 pm

Yes, and the post never did appear (on a previous story). There was nothing really scandalous in it… though I called Bob Dole a "homo" it was in a loving way.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 2:34 pm

I just replied to someone five minutes ago and my reply got eated. Yesterday, I had TWO comments eated after that sinister message. No message today, but ID is taking for-fucking-ever to load and refresh. And tonight's the debate.

sullivanst October 22, 2012 at 3:10 pm

I think ID just likes to fuck with us. I lost a comment the other day, but it was too boring to complain about.

HistoriCat October 22, 2012 at 4:42 pm

If anyone can help Wonkette find a decent commenting system, Rebecca will probably love them long time.

BaldarTFlagass October 22, 2012 at 4:50 pm

Like Skynet, Intense Debate has become self-aware.

James Michael Curley October 22, 2012 at 1:27 pm

The New Yorker Magazine's endorsement of Obama says:
"The reëlection of Barack Obama is a matter of great urgency. Not only are we in broad agreement with his policy directions; we also see in him what is absent in Mitt Romney—a first-rate political temperament and a deep sense of fairness and integrity. A two-term Obama Administration will leave an enduringly positive imprint on political life. It will bolster the ideal of good governance and a social vision that tempers individualism with a concern for community. Every Presidential election involves a contest over the idea of America. Obama’s America—one that progresses, however falteringly, toward social justice, tolerance, and equality—represents the future that this country deserves. http://www.newyorker.com/talk/comment/2012/10/29/

SayItWithWookies October 22, 2012 at 1:36 pm

You know who else was fond of umlauts?

sullivanst October 22, 2012 at 1:42 pm

That's not an umlaut, it's a diaeresis.

SayItWithWookies October 22, 2012 at 1:51 pm

What the hell — I've been on this planet and speaking English for longer than I care to mention, and yet that's the first time I've heard that. Thank you!

sullivanst October 22, 2012 at 2:55 pm

Strangely enough, I learned that in a History class.

ETA: perhaps not so strange, though, since, except in the pages of New Yorker, and occasionally when writing stolen French words like "naïve" or "noël", that particular diacritic has been consigned to dustbin of history.

Chet Kincaid_ October 22, 2012 at 2:14 pm

Immodium will clear that up.

BaldarTFlagass October 22, 2012 at 1:54 pm

Motley Crue? Blue Oyster Cult? Spinal Tap?

Mumbletypeg October 22, 2012 at 3:58 pm

Keyser Söze?

(stolen from upthread

Jukesgrrl October 22, 2012 at 4:23 pm

Thanks, New Yorker. I'm sure that will change a lot of minds in Alabama, Mississippi, Kansas, and Oklahoma.

James Michael Curley October 22, 2012 at 6:06 pm

Theys was all jumpin’ up and down an peeing in their britches when that there Noo Yawker shode a cover with a Muslim Obama and Michelle with the big Afro doin’ a turrist first bump in 2008.

Lionel[redacted]Esq October 22, 2012 at 1:32 pm

So, what we can learn from this is in Conservative circles, you should just bomb first, and worry about taking some time to figure out what happened after you blow up women and children.

After all, it worked for George W. Bush.

Shypixel October 22, 2012 at 1:32 pm

on a side note: What is with all the MLP? I am not now, nor have I ever been, a Bronie.

Dashboard Buddha October 22, 2012 at 1:33 pm

"…nor have I ever been, a Bronie. "

But you could be. Oh yes, you could be.

Chet Kincaid_ October 22, 2012 at 1:36 pm

Yes, but apparently Dok is. And Moms are concerned!
http://sdmomfia.com/2011/06/bronies-adult-men-who

BaldarTFlagass October 22, 2012 at 1:56 pm

What disturbs me even more than Dok's weird obsession is the fact that you knew about this Bronie thing in the first place.

SorosBot October 22, 2012 at 2:04 pm

Is it possible not to know about Bronies in this day and age?

Chet Kincaid_ October 22, 2012 at 2:08 pm

Remember, visiting MLP sites is a violation of your parole!

actor212 October 22, 2012 at 2:28 pm

I was blissfully ignorant of this until Dok started posting here. And wish to return to said state, I hasten to add.

Altho "YAY" here is kinda hot.

Chet Kincaid_ October 22, 2012 at 2:07 pm

All of Man's Knowledge is available in 5 seconds of Googling, especially That Which Is Stupidest.

Jukesgrrl October 22, 2012 at 4:27 pm

Is it my imagination or do those Kardashians look just like MLPs?

MissTaken October 22, 2012 at 2:45 pm

I noticed MLP was on Netflix and after hearing about the Brony-thing I decided to watch an episode. Soon, I was watching 3 or 4 episodes at a time. I would sing Pinkie Pie's "Evil Enchantress" song to my boyfriend. I even got a little pony doll to sit on my desk at stare at me while on comment on our Wonkette. I'm truly addicted.

actor212 October 22, 2012 at 2:48 pm

They're like zombies, MissT. Be careful, you'll fall asleep at your desk one afternoon and wake up to plastic teeth sunk into your throat.

SorosBot October 22, 2012 at 3:08 pm

And you've even made me watch a bunch of episodes. Not that I mind; it's cute.

BaldarTFlagass October 22, 2012 at 3:23 pm

Hell, I'm scared of real horses, like Flounder in Animal House; I don't even want to contemplate horses that talk and sing and do magic and stuff.

Doktor Zoom October 22, 2012 at 6:51 pm

What's truly inexplicable is that I have yet to watch a single episode of the actual show.

YOU CAN'T EXPLAIN IT

Esteev October 22, 2012 at 1:32 pm

There should be a law against calling something "Journalism" when it is clearly "Total Bullshit."

pdiddycornchips October 22, 2012 at 1:34 pm

Terrorists kill our Ambassador and Republicans cheer. Chris Hitchens was right about that fifth column thing after all.

James Michael Curley October 22, 2012 at 1:38 pm

"The Republican nominee has gotten away with a new secretiveness on his fundraising, his tax returns and his budget proposals – without paying much of a political price."

All in one place for that Crazy Uncle who sends the Kenyan Muslim Communist emails.
The Undisclosed Mitt Romney

bflrtsplk October 22, 2012 at 1:39 pm

Now if only Obama hadn`t written the Emancipation Proclamation and forced Lincoln to read it, we would not be going through all this whatever it is that is supposed to be happening but I am just not smart enough to see.

Not_Mother October 22, 2012 at 1:40 pm

So does this mean we can ditch the whole did he say "asshole" or "hole of the ass" thing and git back to the fun stuff like Barry's a gay married murderer, muslin infiltration and the librul media now?

Esteev October 22, 2012 at 2:05 pm

No no, Obama's still a gay.

BaldarTFlagass October 22, 2012 at 1:40 pm

If that's a fact, they must need a heroin IV drip to sleep at night.

cromiller October 22, 2012 at 1:44 pm

In a Romney Administration, American Jesus will whisper the truth into Mitt's ear as soon as something happens, and that will be the official story forever and ever lock, stock and .50 caliber barrel.

Esteev October 22, 2012 at 1:54 pm

Hey, even Saddam wrote a book on Democracy.

Barrelhse October 22, 2012 at 1:57 pm

Say "organ" again.

freddymcmurray October 22, 2012 at 1:59 pm

"Dead Andrew Breitbart’s Big Journalism site"

DAB's BJ's

Coincidence I'm sure.

a_pink_poodle October 22, 2012 at 2:01 pm

What's up with the Pony's?

ProgressiveInga October 22, 2012 at 2:02 pm

We'd tell you, but then we'd have to kill you.

With ponies…

Esteev October 22, 2012 at 2:04 pm

What part of "Obey" is confusing?

SorosBot October 22, 2012 at 2:13 pm

What's up with the Pony's what? Her poster?

MissTaken October 22, 2012 at 2:16 pm

Tiara?

DahBoner October 22, 2012 at 2:08 pm

TRVTH

In ancient Rome, 'U's were expensive, so they just used the less expensive 'V'.

HISTORY.

prommie October 22, 2012 at 7:39 pm

Its hard to carve a curve in stone, its easy to carve straight lines! History and kinda just practicalness.

LibrarianX October 22, 2012 at 2:12 pm

I'm confused. Will Murdoch have someone from WSJ fed to his lions?

BlueStateLibel October 22, 2012 at 2:14 pm

Obama's real failing here is that the tragedy wasn't blamed on Iran, isn't it? That's the way evil-eye Dick Cheney would've rolled.

el_donaldo October 22, 2012 at 2:15 pm

Dead Breitbart: Reality is in the tank for Barack Obama!!!!!!!!!!

Rational, real world community: Why, yes, yes it is.

Gleem McShineys October 22, 2012 at 2:20 pm

Well, that is awesome. I love to see Corpsebart finally exposing the truth of what a shitty paper the WSJ is. *

Keep up the good work! Murder every last RINO, for FREEDOMZ!! You're the only REAL TRUE HONEST ones, Big Government folks!

* Also, this is one of my beliefs, that the WSJ is a shitty paper. And I am a LIBRAL. Therefore, you must destroy BigDeadBart, for it is also in league with LIBRALS!!

*sings* It's The Circul(ar firing squad) Of Life!

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 3:31 pm

*Some*body's almost as neurotically hysterical as *I* am, today.

chascates October 22, 2012 at 2:22 pm

If Obama said it was cloudy today the wingtards would claim there was a conspiracy or coverup.

sullivanst October 22, 2012 at 3:07 pm

"Those aren't clouds, they're just a smokescreen"

"CHEMTRAILS!"

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 3:30 pm

HA-HA-HA-HA-HAAAAAAAAARP!!!

sullivanst October 22, 2012 at 4:17 pm
actor212 October 22, 2012 at 2:27 pm

The WSJ should just pull a Kevin Kline (heh) from "Dave" and come out of the closet for Obama.

Chet Kincaid_ October 22, 2012 at 2:40 pm

Is anyone ever going to get to the bottom of the making of that piece of shit movie? Whose interests and agenda make sense out of fooling people into shooting a vague historical "epic", then overdubbing it with inflammatory insults against Islam, and then making sure it is youtube-injected exactly where it will cause the most religious and cultural butthurt?

prommie October 22, 2012 at 2:53 pm

Mossad apparently has some skills. And Sheldon Adelson, the bagman for Likud buying a president, its something what happens in plain sight and its like The Emporer's New Clothes, everyone is so mau-mau-ed with the "Hitler," you are Hitler if you call Israel an apartheid State.

Chet Kincaid_ October 22, 2012 at 2:59 pm

Israelis are too smart to shit where they live like that. Dumb rich fuckers (regardless of religion) over here are a different matter, though.

On a tangent about dumb rich fuckers: I am surprised that so many of them are dumb and rich. The Newsweek Conventional Wisdom used to be that the Oligarchs were using the Cultural Conservatives to make sure they kept their money; but nowadays it seems like there are many dumb, old, rich true-believing Christianists as well.

Gleem McShineys October 22, 2012 at 3:49 pm

Put me in the Adelson Did It camp, since he seems to be very much in the business of influencing elections here (and abroad.*)
I think his basic game is to try to get Romney/Netanyahu contemporaneous administrations.

I don't know about that "shitting where you live" is an open-and-shut argument against Israel having a hand in this.. The USA will back Israel no matter what happens. You know, "Too Big To Fail" but with foreign policy. Irate and/or openly hostile neighbors to Israel has been pretty goddamn good business for them, so far.

*He owns a free paper in Israel that is drinking all the milkshakes of all the newspapers in Israel, nearly bankrupting them, and it is also pretty much known as "The Bibi Times."

imissopus October 22, 2012 at 3:52 pm

I did this weekend read a totally awesome conspiracy theory about how the whole thing was perpetrated by shadowy right-wingers who then used mercenaries (with the help of Mossad) to pull off the consulate attack in the hope of creating a foreign crisis for Romney to take advantage of and use as fodder against Obama's foreign policy in general. Sort of like how Reagan could attack Carter over the Iran hostage crisis in 1980. It's so crazy, it must be true!

natl_[redacted]_cmdr October 22, 2012 at 8:31 pm

this flag seems false…

James Michael Curley October 22, 2012 at 3:01 pm

There's been a lot being disclosed. I can't remember it all, names and such; but seems to be some drunken idiot working under an alias with funding from a well moneyed radical christian fundamentalist group who practices the anti-Muslim/pro-Israel the Apocalypse is coming. You know the modern day equivalent of political activism as practiced by far right Republican morons.

I think he also has priors and now CA is examining what may be a fraudulent state filing.

GeorgiaBurning October 22, 2012 at 4:33 pm

The fool who produced the film was in violation of his parole; but it's likely nothing much will be done to his backers. Rich scheming fucks inciting a mob to murder for political purpose is, historically, a protected act in California. Though it usually doesn't go international.

James Michael Curley October 22, 2012 at 6:12 pm

Gov. Moonbeam’s got grow a pair soon or he will have a short term. (You know he’ll run again even though he says he won’t)

BaldarTFlagass October 22, 2012 at 3:32 pm

Oh, for a minute there I thought you were still talking about "Prometheus." I was like, dude, it wasn't that bad.

Jus_Wonderin October 22, 2012 at 5:02 pm

I haven't seen that yet. Don't tell me. Don't tell me. I don't want to know. Okay, does it happen in space?

Generation[redacted] October 22, 2012 at 3:38 pm

We won't know the whole truth until we see Atlas Shrugged Part III, which I assume will be 2 1/2 hours of radio monologue.

fitley October 22, 2012 at 3:00 pm

I heard they use a Ouiji board to get their story ideas.

MosesInvests October 22, 2012 at 3:04 pm

Nobody expects the Provencal Inquisition!

calliecallie October 22, 2012 at 3:10 pm

WSJ deserves this. They've just been reprinting corporate news releases as actual news for some time. No editing, no reading probably even. Somebody just slipped them the Obama spin news release on acceptable corporate letterhead and they printed it, no questions asked.

cousinitt October 22, 2012 at 3:11 pm

Breitbart? Ee's just restin', tired and shagged out after a long squawk.

rickmaci October 22, 2012 at 3:15 pm

Romoney campaign had a numerous warnings from the secret Mormon world wide network with hundreds of thousand of spies that an attack on the embassy was imminent but deliberately kept that information from the administration so they could manipulate the event in their favor afterwards. Really. I read that on the interwebs someplace.

Blueb4sinrise October 22, 2012 at 3:35 pm

ME TOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

LibertyLover October 22, 2012 at 3:17 pm

Your comment must be approved by the site admins before it will appear publicly.

You

LibertyLover October 22, 2012 at 3:18 pm

Can't

LibertyLover October 22, 2012 at 3:18 pm

Get

LibertyLover October 22, 2012 at 3:18 pm

It

LibertyLover October 22, 2012 at 3:18 pm

Off

LibertyLover October 22, 2012 at 3:18 pm

Your

LibertyLover October 22, 2012 at 3:19 pm

S h o e s?
S h o e s are the offending word?

Really? Ha Ha Ha Ha HA!

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 3:29 pm

Yeah, I said something with s-h-ooz in it and my comment got eated, too.

Chet Kincaid_ October 22, 2012 at 3:31 pm

Shoes.

Blueb4sinrise October 22, 2012 at 3:41 pm

Chet is in on the conspiracy to ban freedom of footware!!!!!!!.

Blueb4sinrise October 22, 2012 at 3:41 pm

shoes

Mumbletypeg October 22, 2012 at 3:42 pm

You need to add one more comment on the subject in a final attempt. Something like 'Well exc-sho-o-oooes me!"

BaldarTFlagass October 22, 2012 at 3:20 pm

So, I guess this is the last post of the day? Everybody getting their drinky on for tonight or what?

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 3:28 pm

Hic!

Mumbletypeg October 22, 2012 at 3:29 pm

*high-five's*

UnholyMoses October 22, 2012 at 3:56 pm

I'd drink if: a.) I were watching the debate; 2.) was able to drink.

But I'm not doing #1 because, at this point, it's not a debate to help folks decide on who to vote for, as anyone who hasn't decided yet it too stupid to be allowed to vote.

It's a debate for the Villagers so they can wank endlessly about who won and why this is a Game Changer, and Who Won the Night, and update their barely read pages and blogs with not-all-that-insightful insights into some comment that no one really gave two fucks about at the time, but that they'll repeat endlessly as if everyone in America cares.

Or, tl;dr: Debate = fucking retawded.

Chet Kincaid_ October 22, 2012 at 4:10 pm

This Debate Is For Entertainment Purposes Only

MissTaken October 22, 2012 at 4:01 pm

I'm gonna drink! It's the first debate that I'll be home in time to watch from beginning to end. I'll drink each time Mitt lies about Libya, the bottle of wine will be gone in 47 seconds!

BaldarTFlagass October 22, 2012 at 4:08 pm

Better pick up one of those gallon bottles of E&J Gallo.

weejee October 22, 2012 at 4:22 pm

The Eds are all doing tequila shooters to get limbered-up. Either that or they're talking to IntenseDebased tech in Bangalore about the blog, which likely produces a similar effect.

LibertyLover October 22, 2012 at 3:25 pm

Your comment must be approved by the site admins before it will appear publicly.

Is the site admins Imelda Marcos?

Since when are "S h o e s" an offensive word? :-)

BaldarTFlagass October 22, 2012 at 3:33 pm

Maybe it dates back to those clothing spams that used to show up here. "Prada as low as $49"

UnholyMoses October 22, 2012 at 3:45 pm

The word in a main comment = GONE!

The word in a comment to a comment = SHOE SHOE SHOE SHOE SHOE SHOE SHOE SHOE SHOE SHOE SHOE SHOE SHOE SHOE SHOE SHOE SHOE SHOE SHOE SHOE SHOE SHOE SHOE SHOE SHOE SHOE SHOE SHOE SHOE SHOE SHOE SHOE SHOE SHOE SHOE SHOE SHOE SHOEZZZZZ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

UnholyMoses October 22, 2012 at 3:46 pm

And it's only the plural of the word, apparently.

Shoe

See?

weejee October 22, 2012 at 4:06 pm

shoes

SorosBot October 22, 2012 at 4:21 pm

Maybe our editors are offended by the increasing wingnut-dom of a certain newspaper comic strip?

UW8316154 October 22, 2012 at 4:26 pm

I suppose it is better than finding out your comment was "thrown out"….?

natl_[redacted]_cmdr October 22, 2012 at 7:58 pm

oh my god, shoes.

BaldarTFlagass October 22, 2012 at 3:25 pm

Is it really even a "conspiracy" when they do it out in the open and in broad daylight? I mean, they even have that Protocols of the Elders book, it's been in print for a hundred years.

Mumbletypeg October 22, 2012 at 3:33 pm

This is bad news for John McCain and for hobbits

UnholyMoses October 22, 2012 at 3:45 pm

And shoes, apparently.

sullivanst October 22, 2012 at 4:21 pm

Maybe ID was getting drowned by footwear-related spam, or something?

Mumbletypeg October 22, 2012 at 4:29 pm

Could be? Mostly, I just happened to have been browsing the olde wonkette thread I hyperlinked above.. it mentions WSJ, features McCain in a hilarious photoshop like he's possessed by Golem; and includes the following sentence:

Hobbits are of course the most topical fantastical children’s story character for a columnist to choose this summer

That was Kirsten Boyd Johnson, re: use of LOTR references during 2011; this summer of course that same thing could be said, vis-a-vis DokZ's favored pop culture prop, of My Little Ponies~

Blueb4sinrise October 22, 2012 at 3:36 pm

Shoes?

lulzmonger October 22, 2012 at 3:37 pm

Sounds like Hawkins' widdle bum-bum has a case of the unhappys!

Blueb4sinrise October 22, 2012 at 3:37 pm

Well I'll be damned. Maybe someones special child wore those foot covering things.

Chet Kincaid_ October 22, 2012 at 3:41 pm

You mean Trig's shoes? Why are they banning that?! So retarded.

Blueb4sinrise October 22, 2012 at 3:43 pm

HMPPHH!!!!!!!!!
SPECIAL TREATMENT !!
SPECIAL TREATMENT!!
SPECIAL TREATMENT !!
SPECIAL TREATMENT!!
SPECIAL TREATMENT !!
SPECIAL TREATMENT!!

UnholyMoses October 22, 2012 at 3:49 pm

How come I can't write the plural of that word w/out it being eated? To whom do I need to give oral pleasure to get my comments uneated?

Huh? HUH? HEEENNNNGGHHH??!?!?!

natl_[redacted]_cmdr October 22, 2012 at 8:35 pm

girt.

UnholyMoses October 22, 2012 at 3:42 pm

I need some new shoes, as my old shoes are worn out and some new shoes would be wonderful!

BTW — This last debate is retar–er–stupid. Anyone who is still undecided is too … um … stupid<./em> to be allowed to vote. It's just for Villagers who want to wank about who "won" and fill their barely-read pages and blogs with uninteresting and full-of-conventional-stupid not-really-that-insightful insights into Mitt and Obama's comments.

I mean, really. I'd rather watch MNF, or the NLCS, or even House Hunters International (why is real estate in Toronto so fucking expensive, anyway? I mean, Paris I get, but … Toronto?).

UnholyMoses October 22, 2012 at 3:43 pm

S h o e s = COMMENT EATED!!

WTF, Editrix? Y'all farm out the blog to Chinese children or something?

Chet Kincaid_ October 22, 2012 at 3:48 pm

Retarded shoe Trig. (Testing out a theory here, folks.)

UnholyMoses October 22, 2012 at 3:51 pm

You … ::pointing at Chet:: … YOU can post …. ANYTHING?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!

Chet Kincaid_ October 22, 2012 at 3:53 pm

I have transcended mere "good" and "bad" words.

Jus_Wonderin October 22, 2012 at 4:33 pm

Do we begin our worship now, or do you get to set the time? Oh, my bad. I will wait and speak when spoken to.

HistoriCat October 22, 2012 at 4:52 pm

This is obviously a result of Obama's anti-colonial agenda.

Loch_Nessosaur October 22, 2012 at 4:03 pm

In a past life all those words were in posts of mine that ended up being sent off into the ethernet.

Blueb4sinrise October 22, 2012 at 4:11 pm

Is it your p-ness?

sullivanst October 22, 2012 at 4:31 pm

Not that, MittBorg gets censored.

Blueb4sinrise October 22, 2012 at 4:57 pm

Yeah, well, there's other reasons for that though.

Mumbletypeg October 22, 2012 at 3:48 pm

aaaahhhhhhhhhhh- SHOEs!!

MissTaken October 22, 2012 at 3:56 pm

I've had it! Time to throw some shoes at this post!

Mumbletypeg October 22, 2012 at 4:02 pm

ok but just break the shoes to me gently~

weejee October 22, 2012 at 4:07 pm

throwing shoes is retarded?

Seems my being purged by IntenseDebased earlier today now lets me use r**t**ded without flogging.

Chet Kincaid_ October 22, 2012 at 4:07 pm

The plural of shoe is shoes.

weejee October 22, 2012 at 4:13 pm

And if you kick shoes in the s you get shoe.

Is this some sorta shoo-fly pie thing? The rules are all sticky with molasses?

LibertyLover October 22, 2012 at 4:14 pm

huh… it's a mystery.

MissTaken October 22, 2012 at 4:20 pm

The plural of trigger is triggers.

Incitefully_Joe October 22, 2012 at 4:32 pm

The plural of WITCH is WITCHES

Quinn Fabray October 22, 2012 at 4:23 pm

lol course are :D

Fox n Fiends October 22, 2012 at 4:08 pm

SORRY WINGTARDS YOUR RED MEAT HAS E COLI

Gleem McShineys October 22, 2012 at 4:52 pm

Like explosive diarrhea has ever stopped them before.

LibertyLover October 22, 2012 at 4:10 pm

Personally, I am waiting for the other shoe to drop…

Lot_49 October 22, 2012 at 4:13 pm

Where's our Cocktober Surprise? It's actually not too early to deploy it.

Cody October 22, 2012 at 4:18 pm

i love the unicorn

- A October 22, 2012 at 4:22 pm

Hi my friends?

Quinn Fabray October 22, 2012 at 4:22 pm

hi

Mittens Howell, III October 22, 2012 at 4:25 pm

So shoes me.

UW8316154 October 22, 2012 at 4:25 pm

only the wimmenz

LibertyLover October 22, 2012 at 4:25 pm

First, they ban your shoe s and now our Brazilian overlords are back…

Coincidence?

I think not.

MissTaken October 22, 2012 at 4:27 pm

They just reminded me to schedule my next Brazilian. So I guess, yay?

SorosBot October 22, 2012 at 5:19 pm

Thanks, LibertyLover!

Quinn Fabray October 22, 2012 at 4:28 pm

i do not want to fight, ok, xoxo

Generation[redacted] October 22, 2012 at 4:48 pm

How many overlords do we have? A brazillion?

UnholyMoses October 22, 2012 at 5:05 pm

Tell them their nuts suck.

Quinn Fabray October 22, 2012 at 4:27 pm

I do not understand this psot, can you guys explain to me? pls

- A October 22, 2012 at 4:28 pm

kkkkkkkk ninguém vai explicar falar nada

Quinn Fabray October 22, 2012 at 4:29 pm

calada kkk

Cody October 22, 2012 at 4:29 pm

google translator

Quinn Fabray October 22, 2012 at 4:29 pm

be quiet

Cody October 22, 2012 at 4:30 pm

ok

Quinn Fabray October 22, 2012 at 4:27 pm

Its all about unicorns?

Cody October 22, 2012 at 4:29 pm

and sh0es

Quinn Fabray October 22, 2012 at 4:30 pm

oh, that is to interesting

- A October 22, 2012 at 4:29 pm

We want to make friendship uneducated Americans

MissTaken October 22, 2012 at 4:31 pm
- A October 22, 2012 at 4:32 pm

folow-me

MissTaken October 22, 2012 at 4:51 pm

I too unedubicated two folow yoo

sullivanst October 22, 2012 at 4:45 pm

Yes, I always find calling people uneducated is a foolproof way of making friends with them.

UnholyMoses October 22, 2012 at 5:02 pm

If you want uneducated Americans, you might wanna check over here.

SorosBot October 22, 2012 at 5:23 pm

…the fuck?

Radiotherapy October 22, 2012 at 4:30 pm

Just heard on Innanity: He has more on the Benghazi "Cover-Up."

BlueStateLibel October 22, 2012 at 4:39 pm

What the hell could a "cover-up" be? it was a horrible tragedy, but so was 9/11, and no one accused Dubya of a "cover-up." Or Reagan when those Marines were killed in Beirut. I still don't see where they possibly think they could go with this. But let them bang their heads against a wall for all I care.

sullivanst October 22, 2012 at 4:55 pm

no one accused Dubya of a "cover-up."

Apparently you'll be surprised to hear news of the latest movie starring Martin Sheen and Buddy Harrelson.

So make that "nobody in their right minds …"

Quinn Fabray October 22, 2012 at 4:30 pm

Now i got to go, byee

Cody October 22, 2012 at 4:31 pm

bye biatch

- A October 22, 2012 at 4:32 pm

BIATCH?? fail kkkkkk

Cody October 22, 2012 at 6:28 pm

fail yo ass

Quinn Fabray October 22, 2012 at 4:31 pm

Hey, follow me pls :D

LibertyLover October 22, 2012 at 5:01 pm

Where are you going that we need to follow you there?

UnholyMoses October 22, 2012 at 5:03 pm

Hey, go away pls

SorosBot October 22, 2012 at 5:20 pm

I still can't forgive you for lying to your boyfriend about the baby being his, even though you had never actually had sex with him.

UnholyMoses October 22, 2012 at 4:33 pm

Well … given that most of us can't post about footwear in the plural form, can we at least get a new thread?

Or are our editors already drunk and passed out?

Hello?

This thing on?

Bueller?

Frye?

Cox?

Jus_Wonderin October 22, 2012 at 4:39 pm

"Uhura, get me Starbase 12."

"Sir, all subspace communication is being blocked."

"Is there something you can do by tinkering with that panel down there?"

"I can kick it, Sir."

"Kick it! Kick it now!"

BaldarTFlagass October 22, 2012 at 4:49 pm

Mr Scott, engage Brazilian shields!

LibertyLover October 22, 2012 at 5:03 pm

Better than engaging Brooke Shields.

Less effective than engaging underarm shields though.

Chet Kincaid_ October 22, 2012 at 4:35 pm

Goddamnit, who was supposed to be on Brazilian Watch?!

weejee October 22, 2012 at 4:42 pm

Have never cared for Brazil nutz. Now if Pelé were posting…

BaldarTFlagass October 22, 2012 at 4:46 pm

Too late! They're inside the perimeter! That's it man, game over man, game over! What the fuck are we gonna do now? What are we gonna do?

emmelemm October 22, 2012 at 8:11 pm

You better just start dealing with it, Baldar.

mille derps October 22, 2012 at 4:52 pm

Watch on, watch off…

Gleem McShineys October 22, 2012 at 4:55 pm

Somebody ought to wax them.

LibertyLover October 22, 2012 at 5:03 pm

I see what you did there.

Gleem McShineys October 22, 2012 at 6:04 pm

No way, it should have been sooo smoooth!

mavenmaven October 22, 2012 at 4:35 pm

This coming from people who blocked even photos of the funerals of the thousands killed in the Iraq war run by the GOP for profit, lied about Jessica Lynch and Pat Tillman, and are banging the drums for another bloody war in Iran… They only care about incidents like this if they get political/economic gain from it.

sullivanst October 22, 2012 at 4:47 pm

They only care about incidents like this anything at all if they get political/economic gain from it.

FIFY.

- A October 22, 2012 at 4:41 pm

Adios para usted kkk

BigSkullF*ckingDog October 22, 2012 at 4:48 pm

No posts all afternoon and now the best witty repartee Brazil has to offer.

OH FOR FUCKS SAKE.

weejee October 22, 2012 at 4:58 pm

OFFS 4 sure

Blueb4sinrise October 22, 2012 at 4:58 pm

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

UnholyMoses October 22, 2012 at 5:06 pm

Be friends, kkkkkkkkkkk? xoxox para dande est

LibertyLover October 22, 2012 at 5:31 pm

Follow me, pls. kkkkkk

;-)

natl_[redacted]_cmdr October 22, 2012 at 8:00 pm

[drinks] woot!

Lionel[redacted]Esq October 22, 2012 at 4:57 pm

So, has Wonkette gone on strike? Or simply been taken over by the Brazilians? Why are shoes not allowed? Yet Fascistic Little Ponies are OK. Is this retarded, or is there a deeper meaning?

All I know is that I have four more hours to kill before I will have an intoxicant of any kind within my grasp. You think you have problems? Think about that.

LibertyLover October 22, 2012 at 5:05 pm

Breathe. In. Out. Repeat.

You should be good until then.

Chet Kincaid_ October 22, 2012 at 4:57 pm

Whoa.

Fuck Toad October 22, 2012 at 6:25 pm

Always with the ponies with you, Doktor…

natl_[redacted]_cmdr October 22, 2012 at 8:01 pm

NEEDZ MOAR PONEEZ PLZ!!11!DOKTORB!

ttommyunger October 23, 2012 at 5:17 am

But Breitbart is still dead, right?

UW8316154 October 22, 2012 at 1:42 pm

I'm on a horse!!

Generation[redacted] October 22, 2012 at 1:57 pm

He made a pie and redistributed it.

Esteev October 22, 2012 at 2:01 pm

What about the Pie Bakers. Do they not deserve some flax breaks?

HistoriCat October 22, 2012 at 2:08 pm

You are too kind!

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 2:09 pm

I totally understand. I won't even tell you about my Burroughsian fantasies and Mitt.

mrpuma2u October 22, 2012 at 2:12 pm

Those who have braved the murky swamps of breitbart-dom may bear the stigma of reading some of the verbal muck spewed by these mouth breathing cretins.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 2:52 pm

Ha-HA!

bikerlaureate October 22, 2012 at 3:43 pm

Nice.

That original aggressor wasn't a very bipartisan amoeba.

weejee October 22, 2012 at 2:53 pm

Yer welcome.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 2:54 pm

Thanks, sweetie. I'll try.

Jukesgrrl October 22, 2012 at 4:01 pm

"It'll all be over in a couple of weeks."

Yeah, that's what I'm afraid of.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 3:09 pm

So what made you go all hatey-stabby on the Prime Minister today, dude? I thought Finland was full of peaceable Yurpean hippie socialist love-n-peace types.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 3:34 pm

ID eated my comment about you and the Finnish prime minister. Dammit.

Generation[redacted] October 22, 2012 at 3:15 pm

That depends on how much dough they make.

Esteev October 22, 2012 at 3:33 pm

It keeps rising, despite the economy.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 3:34 pm

Of course!

UnholyMoses October 22, 2012 at 3:34 pm

Not that I mind; it's cute.

::blink::

::blinkblink::

actor212 October 22, 2012 at 4:00 pm

He was suspended three times for doping, actually.

sullivanst October 22, 2012 at 4:07 pm

Yeah, if they're Borroughsian, they're probably better left unsaid. People might be eating.

actor212 October 22, 2012 at 4:12 pm

The knife attack?

actor212 October 22, 2012 at 4:13 pm

I think we need to review his Man Card.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 4:16 pm

You have NO idea, my dear friend. I seem to have laid my hands upon a fine strain of the Noble Herb that encourages … visualizations.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 4:17 pm

Chin up, old girl! Or as Mehitabel said, "Toujours gai! There's life in the old dame yet!"

Barack will WIN this thing. Nate Silver said so, and we all know he is just the cleverest little boy.

MissTaken October 22, 2012 at 4:18 pm

It's okay, I punched his Man Card with my tongue several times afterwards to keep his points up.

actor212 October 22, 2012 at 4:23 pm

In that case, I'll need you to review my Man Card, as well.

sullivanst October 22, 2012 at 4:28 pm

Herb? At least it's not black meat, then.

Incitefully_Joe October 22, 2012 at 4:46 pm

Not going to lie, most of the others are terrible in ways that are different, but competing. As in, if we switch to Disqus, I doubt I'll be able to comment at all, if my experience with other sites any indication.

sullivanst October 22, 2012 at 4:51 pm

Although there's a difference between the sports (e.g. athletics) where there's a concerted effort by the governing bodies to catch and exclude the cheats, vs those (baseball, cycling) where the governing bodies stick their heads in the sand, aware that there's a problem and that it's so bad that it will seriously discredit their sport when the public finds out about it, and hoping to avoid the latter from happening, vs those (football, professional wrestling) where the governing bodies see body types that are impossible to achieve naturally as a welcome part of the spectacle.

HistoriCat October 22, 2012 at 4:58 pm

That's why I was hoping someone knew of a decent commenting system.ID isn't that bad most of the time … but their customer serviceseems to be non-existent.

sullivanst October 22, 2012 at 5:00 pm

Agreed. I've struggled horribly with Disqus-based sites too, and LiveFyre's a fucking joke.

The system that's annoyed me least was DKos' comment system, which I'm pretty sure was written in-house by ct. ID is the next least worst in my experience.

Lascauxcaveman October 22, 2012 at 7:41 pm

Oh. I thought that was just for eating human flesh.

Lascauxcaveman October 22, 2012 at 7:45 pm

Lol.

You used the words "wrestling" and "sport" in the same sentence.

C_R_Eature October 22, 2012 at 8:10 pm

You can do both. You can't fool me.

Soylent Green, it's Neighbors!

fuflans October 22, 2012 at 8:15 pm

that just made me think about 'no I'LL shoot the cook, my car's parked out back anyway'.

come to think, 'once upon a time in mexico' may be way better for my blood pressure and liver than tonight is likely to be.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 8:38 pm

SHH! C_R_Eature will hear you and think it's me noshing out of turn again.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 8:40 pm

Nah, I'm too gimpy to chase 'em down. Plus, I threw my back out, remember? The kids tho … it's Hallowe'en, soon, innit?

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 8:40 pm

Hey! There it is! Look below.

C_R_Eature October 22, 2012 at 8:47 pm

Yes it is. Get your Taser now, before the stores run out. Happens every year.

MittBorg October 22, 2012 at 8:55 pm

Lure them in with a little carefully placed chocolate … a few slugs on the staircase …

viennawoods13 October 22, 2012 at 8:58 pm

Charlotte, Emily and Anne would like to have a chat with you.

C_R_Eature October 22, 2012 at 8:59 pm

You've done this before. Haven't you?

sullivanst October 23, 2012 at 10:34 am

Given they were all dead by the end of 1855, I don't think that much affects my point ;) Especially as their father made up that spelling for reasons unknown, but plausibly to seem more important by referencing Greek mythology.

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