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Daily Caller Explains It Was Named After ‘The Time Dick Cheney Shot That Guy In The Face’

mouthbreathyWHAT THE FUCK, Daily Caller? Why are you going around explaining that you were named after the time Dick Cheney “shot that guy in the face”?

[Tucker] Carlson insisted it was vital this new media outlet be given a name that resembled a traditional news outlet. [...]
But as Patel recounted, “it’s virtually impossible to find a domain name that includes words like the Times or the Tribune these days — unless you want to pay a lot of money for them.” So Patel started racking his brain for other name ideas.

And then he remembered the time Dick Cheney shot that guy in the face.

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So the Daily Caller named itself after the Corpus Christie paper that was cold scooping the world constantly on how Dick Cheney “shot that guy in the face.” Remember the hilarity of how Dick Cheney refused to talk to the cops after he “shot that guy in the face”? And how the guy who he shot in the face held a press conference to apologize to Dick Cheney for getting in the way of his gun, with his face?

Oh how such fine fellows as Tucker Carlson must have been rolling in hilarity.

What else could the Daily Caller have daily called itself, if it hadn’t chosen to name itself after the paper reporting on how Dick Cheney “shot that guy in the face”?

  • Himbo.com
  • Das Racist.org
  • DickCheneyShotThatGuyInTheFace.tv
  • Tuddfuckers.edu

[DailyCaller]

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About the author

Rebecca is the editor and publisher of Wonkette. She is the author of Commie Girl in the O.C., a collection of her OC Weekly columns, and the former editor of LA CityBeat. Go visit her Commie Girl Collective, and follow her on the Twitter!

View all articles by Rebecca Schoenkopf

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121 comments

        1. SorosBot

          Yeah, but even "one more day" with Spider-Man selling his marriage to the devil was better than the New 52.

      1. FlownOver

        Especially white people in Ford trucks eating apple pie while they drag blahs in chains behind said Ford trucks, as bald eagles circle overhead.

        Now that there's some fun times!

  1. noodlesalad

    For a post that contains both "Tucker Carlson" and "got shot in the face," I found this post very unsatisfying. For those who feel like me, I'd just like to put these words together, where they belong. "Tucker Carlson got shot in the face" – with votes.

    1. prommie

      I would not be surprised to learn Tucker Carlson has taken a lot of loads in the face. Oh, wait, thats a different kind of "shot,"

    1. elviouslyqueer

      Linky is blocked. HAS A SAD.

      (Btw, Tate County is just below me, and is generally regarded regionally as the epicenter of white trashdom. An epic accomplishment, even by Mississippi standards.)

      1. FakaktaSouth

        The Daily Dick Pic with a new one of Tuck's face everyday would have been too on the nose, I suppose.

          1. FakaktaSouth

            Maybe THAT'S what's wrong with his face – his black lace thong is all wrapped up too tightly where his dick should be. It's on your shoulders, asshole.

          2. prommie

            Bad associations, bad, do not like, I don't want to see tucker anywhere anyhow near a black lace thong. Not that dickhead.

  2. Oblios_Cap

    "it’s virtually impossible to find a domain name that includes words like the Times or the Tribune these days — unless you want to pay a lot of money for them.”

    Those pesky free-market principles always crop up in the most inconvenient ways, don't thye?

    Someone oughta pass a law.

    1. Lot_49

      Remember when this used to be called "cyber-squatting"? As though figuring out that GM.com might have market value before somebody at GM did were comparable to illegally occupying real estate. Rent-seeking capitalists are the fiercest enemies of capitalism.

    1. Biel_ze_Bubba

      My thoughts exactly. Why didn't he borrow $20,000 from his parents, like good Republican capitalists are supposed to do? Why does Tucker Carlson hate Amercia?

  3. jodyleek

    Why not DeadeyeDick.com?

    I know, that would be silly. Mr. Vonnegut's character actually felt remorse.

  4. SorosBot

    And yet shooting a guy in the face was still one of the least deadly things Cheney ever did while Vice President.

  5. Lascauxcaveman

    Shoottheguyintheface.com. When the 'news' website goes out of business, he can sell the remaining assets (ie. domain name) to a pornsite developer.

  6. weejee

    That mug shot is totally Tuckered. It makes me wish I was wishing Carlson would stop hitting my fist with his nose. Hitting it with votes, obvs.

  7. calliecallie

    He needs to go back to Dancing with the Stars. They're doing an alumnae edition. Bristol Palin has been on again.

  8. Conveidt

    The name of the newspaper that reported Cheney's shooting of one of his hunting buddies isn't the Daily Caller. It's the Corpus Christi Caller Times or as we call it, the Smaller Times – the content has shrunk to almost nothing or the Chamber of Commerce Caller Times for it's probusiness bias.

  9. Naked_Bunny

    This certainly gives me an idea of a fun activity the Daily Caller staff can do at their Halloween party.

  10. Detesticle

    Tucker Up Buttercup
    Tucker It Up The Butt In Carlson Caverns
    Tuckered Out
    Tucker Tucker Gooser

    He missed the brainstorming session

  11. Stevola

    "Shot that guy in the face?" As I recall, he was merely "peppered" with bird shot.
    I think his last words before being peppered were,"Is there anything you boys can't fuck up?"

  12. chascates

    Wikipedia: After Carlson told Stewart "I think you're more fun on your show," Stewart replied by saying: "You know what's interesting though? You're as big a dick on your show as you are on any show."

    Therefore Daily Caller should become Big Dick.

  13. DahBoner

    DickCheneyShotThatGuyInTheFace.tv

    Because
    DickCheneyShotThatGuyInTheFace.com
    DickCheneyShotThatGuyInTheFace.net
    DickCheneyShotThatGuyInTheFace.org

    …were already snapped up!

Comments are closed.