chemtrails and flouridaters also too

Jerome ‘Obama Is A Queer Gay-Married Breitbart-Coroner-Murdering Muslin’ Corsi Flying Around On Mitt Romney’s Plane

Corsi (right)And now news comes that the dean of White House Queer Muslin Murder ‘Spiracy Theories, Jerome Corsi of WND, is stone cold flying around on Mitt Romney’s plane, like a boss! So let us put on our OWN conspiracy caps (it is a crimson fez, duh), and ask the clear and obvious question: Who’d Jerome Corsi murder to get on Mitt Romney’s plane?

Give up? It was Mitt Romney’s last shred of dignity! BOOM!

Visit NBCNews.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

[Maddow]

About the author

Rebecca is the editor and publisher of Wonkette. She is the author of Commie Girl in the O.C., a collection of her OC Weekly columns, and the former editor of LA CityBeat. Go visit her Commie Girl Collective, and follow her on the Twitter!

View all articles by Rebecca Schoenkopf

Comments

Hey there, Wonkeputians! Shypixel here to remind you to remember our Commenting Rules For Radicals, Enjoy!

  • Reginald_Perrin

    Better question, who did Corsi suck off to get a place on the plane?

    • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

      I just washed my brain!

    • http://twitter.com/iburl iburl

      Rafalca

      • http://www.wonkette.com ChillBill

        Damn you!

      • cousinitt

        If I'm not mistaken, it was the other way around. We're talking Rafalca here, not some mangy, flea-ridden writer whose sole claim to fame was as a failed financial investor in Poland.

        OT, loved the Perrin show on BBC.

    • http://www.wonkette.com ChillBill

      Rafalca?

    • UnholyMoses

      AOTK

    • http://intensedebate.com/people/mrblifil mrblifil

      Tagg? Trigg? Is there a difference?

    • Negropolis

      Everyone knows that it was AOT,K.

  • BadKitty904

    Who's the crazy-lookin' couch-tater to the left of Corsi?

    • http://twitter.com/iburl iburl

      Chunkk Romney

      • BadKitty904

        The unemployed one who lives in his parent's basement?

      • dr_giraud

        Clump Romney

    • Callyson

      Ann Coulter.

      • BadKitty904

        Dang, that girl's let herself go. She's never gonna catch herself a husband that way…

    • http://facethesuncastnoshadow.wordpress.com/ Mumbletypeg

      Bradlee Dean, remaking himself again. Keeps showin up, never catches a hint

    • AncienReggie

      I''m pretty sure that's Jonah Goldberg. Or maybe his twin sister, Jeenah Goldberg.

    • tessiee

      I think it's his cat, Bruce.

  • no_gravity

    Where can I send my resume to so I can also get a job as a fucking nutter?

    • zumpie

      Why a binder, of course!!! Duh!!!

    • Ducksworthy

      I assume you mean "Highly compensated fucking nutter." You can submit your resume to Paul Ryan for 2016. He'll begin hiring as soon as he is unemployed, November 7.

      • tessiee

        That assumes he's going to lose *both* races for office in which he's currently running.
        Too sweet to hope for, amirite?

        • EatFrankRich

          From your lips to the electorate's ears.

    • LibertyLover

      There isn't a place to send your resume, but selling your soul to the devil is a condition upon employment.

  • http://twitter.com/iburl iburl

    Corsi… that's the guy playing keyboards on the railroad track on YouTube, right?

    • Nostrildamus

      Corsi was actually off-camera in those videos, keeping the singer on tempo by waggling his pecker back and forth to the beat.

      • Gleem McShineys

        Which explains the poor timing.

        • Nostrildamus

          The score was marked Lardo Amoroso.

  • http://www.wonkette.com ManchuCandidate

    Trololol Mittens.

  • EnnuiThereYet?

    TSA Agents everywhere breath a sigh of relief. For the next couple of weeks they won't have to pat down Jerome Corsi's fleshy groin area.

  • BadKitty904

    Based on the look on that cat's face, someone is *SO* gonna find a hairball in his shoe…

    • zumpie

      I think more likely something from the OTHER end of the kitty…

      • widestanceromance

        Yes, look for the hairball under the pile of turds.

  • CrunchyKnee

    I wonder if a guy can get a beer on the Romney flight?

    Oh, and wingnut ballast libel.

  • SorosBot

    Maybe Romney will go all-in with the conspiracy nuttiness in the next debate; he can rant about Nobama being a gay Marxist Muslim atheist who secretly plots to take all the guns away and install the UN as the rulers of America and won't admit the truth about the coverup of the moon landing or the aliens at Area 51. Oh and he's a reptloid alien also too.

    • BadKitty904

      I still have to laugh at the UN-conspiracy nutters. My Granny's bridge club would more effective at forming a secret one-world gubbmint…

      AND make better pimento-cheese finger sammiches.

    • UnholyMoses

      Needs moar Sharia law.

    • MegPasadena

      The sad thing is he might just win on that due to the confused minds of the swing voters and an super energized base.

  • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

    Boy, I sure hope that plane doesn't crash in a ditch full of pitch and hot tar, I tell you what. Because that would be bad.

    • Radiotherapy

      You mean a ditch full of pitch and hot tar and votes, amirite?

    • HempDogbane

      Tell us, Bob Dole, what would be so bad?

      • tessiee

        I assumed that actor was channeling Hank Hill, not Bob Dole, but I think Romney, Ryan, and Corsi are already familiar with pitch and hot tar. In fact, it's about the only way I can think of to explain why any of them have careers.

        • HempDogbane

          Dole told of a busload of supply-side economists going over a cliff. It was a great tragedy – there were several empty seats.

          • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

            Oh, I forgot about that! Dammit. I could have worked that in somehow.

    • http://www.facebook.com/pages/Johnny-Appletruth/133951326629923?sk=wall deanbooth

      If geese we sucked into the engines on the way down, hilarity would ensue.

      • Biff

        "We'll be in the Hudson"…

  • FakaktaSouth

    Oh good! I hope they try to open ALL the windows AND doors on that plane now, just suck that prick right on out at 40,000 feet.

    • prommie

      Umm, ahem, umm, oh fuck, I can't even.

      • FakaktaSouth

        Sometimes it's best just to not. But I know, I know, word juxtapositions can be funny things.

        • prommie

          Now its just adjacentness that I am all verklempt about.

    • Boojum

      That's no snake on that plane!

    • http://www.facebook.com/pages/Johnny-Appletruth/133951326629923?sk=wall deanbooth

      Mile high club, here we cum!

    • Fare la Volpe

      Which prick?

  • Not_So_Much

    I thought Corsi just flew around on the back of Bat Boy?

    • sullivanst

      Rick Scott wasn't going where he wanted to go, so he needed a different means of transportation.

    • tessiee

      Steve Buscemi libel!

  • http://www.wonkette.com ChillBill

    If Mitt and Corsi had souls, they'd be soulmates.

    • Oblios_Cap

      Willard's plotting to kill him and dead baptize his ass.

  • el_donaldo

    Somebody just farted in the right-wing echo chamber.

  • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

    I see that cat, and it looks pissed off, like "Dude, I'm a cat. They're not going to scan my brain because the aliens from Procyon 12? They're cats too."

    • SmutBoffin

      Haha, the notion that cats have gained anything from their symbiotic relationship with peoplez is overblown. They are just embarrassed to be seen with us in public, really.

    • Generation[redacted]

      "The saucer people bring me milk. It's their job."

    • widestanceromance

      Oh, silly actor. The foil on the cat is to prevent brainwashing frequencies from getting OUT of the cat, not in.

      • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

        Oh, I hadn't consid–*zap*

        Must. Feed. Cat.

        • Biff

          Me too. And I don't even have a cat!

  • http://gratuity.wordpress.com/ Gratuitous World

    Please stow your Breitbart corpses in the overhead compartments.

    • http://facethesuncastnoshadow.wordpress.com/ Mumbletypeg

      Careful when you open them though, or a Seamus corpse might fall out

  • Crank_Tango

    Nothing to look at here, kids. Just flying around in a plane, laying down some chem trails.

  • http://citizenfuturist.wordpress.com/ RufusTFirefly

    Connect the dots, sheeple!!11!!!

  • PhilippePetain

    Of "Corsi" is! HAHAHAHAHA

  • http://lostintarnation.blogspot.com/ SayItWithWookies

    As if hanging out with Paul Ryan, John Bolton and Condi Rice wasn't enough of a fact-free environment. I swear, if Mitt gets elected he's gonna make Dubya look like Albert Einstein, Martin Luther King and General Marshall all rolled into one.

    • MegPasadena

      You forgot Donald Trump and his fucking cake with Egg on Rafalca.

  • http://wonkette.com/ weejee

    Tinfoil kitty libel.

  • http://slackoftownnola.wordpress.com Comrade Wingtardd

    What does that make Mittens' planes name now? The Coast to Coast ?

    • http://lostintarnation.blogspot.com/ SayItWithWookies

      The Purple Heartless?

      • Generation[redacted]

        Swift Derpers for Derp.

    • zumpie

      No. It's still Stupid Fucking Douchebag Who's Gonna Lose.

    • Barrelhse

      Around the World.

    • tessiee

      too bad "The Silver Douchebag" is already Babs Bush's nickname, or they could call it that.

  • eggsacklywright

    Sooo, Corsi's taking a break from setting kittens on fire?

  • PsycWench

    Ted Kaczynski couldn't make it this time.

    • Negropolis

      And, Timmy McVeigh is kind of busy in hell at the moment.

  • BadKitty904

    PIC CAPTION: "Conservative's blood marches through my veins like giant radioactive rubber pants! The pants command me! Do not ignore my veins!"

    (with apologies to "Invader Zim")

  • StealthMuslin

    So this would be kind of like Obama letting the head of NAMBLA pilot Air Force One.
    Into the Vatican.

    • Sue4466

      Except the media would freak out about that. This, not so much.

    • SorosBot

      Aren't NAMBLA'a goals pretty much shared by the Vatican?

      • natl_[redacted]_cmdr

        HIYO!

      • StealthMuslin

        Point.

  • kittensdontlie

    Corsi is still so upset that Barry never gay-married him.

  • mbobier

    Oh noes! A secret Muslin gay-married murderer is President?!? Come on, Corsi. You can do better than that.

    Or maybe you're so tied up in your own hysterical hatred that you actually CAN'T do better than that.

    Sad. The tinfoil-hatted cat in the pic above is probably more rational than Corsi.

    • tessiee

      Cats in general are more rational than people in general.
      "I'll get this big thing to bring me a plate of food, then lick myself, then I think I'll take a nap"
      How many people do you know that have a life that good?

  • mbobier

    Also, Rachel Maddow is amazing.

    • mbatch

      And in this case spectacularly pissed. Man, she sent those papers flying at the end. Way to go, Rachel!

  • Radiotherapy

    Wingnuts make strange fellows…in bed.

  • Oblios_Cap

    Author and pundit Debbie Schlussel has accused Corsi of plagiarizing elements from columns that she has published, and subsequently posting them under his byline in his WorldNetDaily column

    Wow! He really is a loser.

    • Generation[redacted]

      I feel bad for her. It's like finding out the Unabomber lifted your secret journal and published it as his manifesto.

    • SmutBoffin

      So lemme get this straight…it's not just made-up bullshit, but it is stolen made-up bullshit?

      • Oblios_Cap

        I got it from wikipedia, so I make no claims as to truthiness.

    • natl_[redacted]_cmdr

      Plagiarized bullshit? Stay kkklassy, Corsi.

      • Biff

        Hive mind!

  • http://www.wonkette.com/ FlownOver

    Claiming credit for Corsi's spews – now there's a great career move!

  • elviouslyqueer

    WOW. 10:15 of Rachel Maddow's righteously indignant takedown of the simulacrum world these right-wing fuckholes live in, punctuated by her exasperated paper-flinging, made me jizz my pants so hard that it blew my zipper clear across the room.

    • LibertyLover

      Ok… not a visual I want in my mind… but it did make me laugh.

      • elviouslyqueer

        Wonkette: because outside of a Michel Foucault text, where else are you going to see such an erudite juxtaposition of "simulacrum" and "jizz"?

        • http://www.wonkette.com/ FlownOver

          Wonket am large, it contain multitudes.

        • tessiee

          MST3K out-takes?

        • Wile E. Quixote

          An episode of "Archer"?

          • Doktor Zoom

            Holy crap! You're back! Missed ya!

          • Wile E. Quixote

            I had to take a mental health break from politics. It was just too goddamned depressing. Jesus H. Fucking Christ our election season is too fucking long. It takes the British about what, six weeks to run an election? We take almost an entire year to do it.

    • widestanceromance

      Pics?

    • Yellerdawg

      Did it kill the cat?

      • Gleem McShineys

        Protective foil headgear. SURVIVED!

    • emmelemm

      It made me laugh too. And it's not so bad an image.

  • AngryBlakGuy

    …on 'Mormon Air' the only reading material you find in the seat back are "Binders of Women"!

    • natl_[redacted]_cmdr

      Like SkyMall, only filled with underaged girls.

      And once again I've made myself ill.

      • Gleem McShineys

        "Ooh, the spring line of calves looks to die for, don't you think, Mother?"

        –Frubb Romney

  • http://www.wonkette.com/ FlownOver

    Corsi was brought in off the bench when Romney heard the complaints about his JohnBolton/Kris Kobach brain trust.

  • Goonemeritus

    Lay down light bulb lickers you wake with Republican conspiracy theories dancing in your head.

  • http://wonkette.com/ weejee

    Hillz / Maddow 2016

  • zumpie

    Great. Now my kitty wants to know why WE aren't wearing matching tin foil hats.

    • AngryBlakGuy

      …tell your cat that those tinfoil hats are so that the Scientologist can't read your minds

      • zumpie

        She won't care if they promise her the ability to literally climb the walls (her current dearest wish) or fly.

  • neiltheblaze

    Romney is branching out from FOX News and the WSJ Editorial page, I see.

  • WinterOuthouse

    Corsi, the epitome of lower intestinal distress

  • http://hong-kong-actresses.blogspot.com/ Chow Yun Flat

    Our Editrix must be especially adorable in a crimson fez.

    • Boojum

      With tassels.

      • Gleem McShineys

        *Puts DO NOT DISTURB sign on bunk*

    • docterry6973

      A crimson fez and a smile.

  • prommie

    Come on now, I have been saying this for weeks, his campaign people are just totally fucking with him now! Imagine how hard it must be for them to keep a straight face!

    • Biff

      Keep in mind, Tagg is in charge.

  • prommie

    And by the way, the Steely-Dan-ness of it all, just what in the holy hell is that supposed to mean, "ain't never gonna do it without your fez on?"

    • prommie

      Fucking Steely Dan always was captain obvious, "they call Alabama the Crimson Tide." its like, what? Hey Nineteen? The fine columbian makes tonight a wonderful thing? that shit will give you California poisoning, those boys were soft in the head. I am just talking to myself over here now, I guess.

      • FakaktaSouth

        Okay, besides the fact that all positive Bama references are cool, the best thing about Steely Dan is DEFINITELY their name. I do not care for their smooth white guy soulfulness. It puts me to sleep.

      • thebeatgoeson

        I like your taste in music, sir! First pro-TMBG, and now anti-Steely Dan. I never saw their appeal. Their music annoys the hell out of me.

    • Indiepalin

      Fagan and Becker got their start as sidemen for Jay and the Americans.

    • http://www.toastcat.com Fred_Wertham_Jr

      It doesn't mean anything. Like all Steely Dan, it is empty bullshit.

      • prommie

        Perfect then for Willard Romney!

  • http://rightthinkingamerican.blogspot.com johnnyzhivago

    Snake on a Plane?

    • BadKitty904

      "I have *HAD* it with these goddamn fakes on this goddamn plane!"

      There. SOMEbody had to say it…

    • tessiee

      Needz moar mongoose.

  • Lot_49

    If picking Ryan as veep was a hail Mary play, what is credentialing Corsi?

    Maybe you call it, "Please proceed, Governor."

  • TootsStansbury

    I thought nuts were no longer allowed on planes; due to food allergies and all.

  • bikerlaureate

    This has to be a plot to entice the President into slinging mud. No one is so tone-deaf that they'd hang out with Corsi unless they wanted to be mocked.
    Is Kris Kobach (the SB1070 guy) riding along too?

    • http://www.wonkette.com/ FlownOver

      Sadly, no. He's semi-busy as the semi-Secretary of State in Baja Nebraska.

  • http://hong-kong-actresses.blogspot.com/ Chow Yun Flat

    Gadzooks! No wonder all the ladies want to gay marry Rachel Maddow.

    • Tio_Doidinho

      And a few of the gay boys, too, also.

  • Blueb4sinrise

    CORSEE IZ SPIYIING!! WAKES UIP MORMAN SHEEPLES!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • natl_[redacted]_cmdr

    Well, this stupid fuckwit should just about guarantee a Romney victory, no?

  • natl_[redacted]_cmdr

    Also, too, in addition, I want to have Rachel's babies.

  • http://www.wonkette.com/ FlownOver

    I guess this just didn't fit the theory.

    • http://inappropriatejobpostings.blogspot.com/ fuflans

      oh dear god.

      i cannot WAIT for the inevitable fallout in wingtardlandia.

  • Weenus299

    So many Romney passengers. So few mountains.

  • James Michael Curley

    Fezes are cool.

  • cheetojeebus

    Jeff Gannon is fucking Edward R Morrow compared to this stain.

  • tessiee

    I can hardly wait for the Jon McNaughton painting of this.

  • bringmeanaxe

    A crimson fez? When did my Wonkette join teh Shriners?

    • http://hong-kong-actresses.blogspot.com/ Chow Yun Flat

      They love to drive around in those tiny Shriner cars. Water balloon, also.

  • prommie

    So, anyone, anyone mention the Samuel L. Jackson possibilities? There are motherfucking ___________ s on this motherfucking plane?

    • Tio_Doidinho

      Snakes? (an obvious choice…)

    • natl_[redacted]_cmdr

      Fuckwits.

  • owhatever

    O.J. Simpson is being brought aboard to offer advice about women.

    • Dumbedup

      It's called out – reach

  • tessiee

    Gee whiz, I sure hope Mr. Corsi gives Mr. Romney lots of ideas to use in the next debate! That would just be swell!

    • bikerlaureate

      Nooooo! That would be catastrophic! The whole election would be lost!
      Under no circumstances should Mistuh Romney take a single piece of advice from Corsi, EVAR!

  • LibrarianX

    Rhymes with "orange."

  • http://slackoftownnola.wordpress.com Comrade Wingtardd

    It's not Mittens' fault. There was a vat on the plane full of pig vomit, bat's blood and the brain of Abbe Normal … someone threw in Barbara Bush' toenails and Jerome Corsi just stone cold fucking showed the fuck up.

  • Toomush_Infer

    Nonsense! Emperor Romney is just following the Roman tradition: surround yourself with idiots….

  • http://www.dailydickpunch.com Magic Sam

    God damn, I love that woman.

  • DahBoner

    "One of us is an idiot" — The Cat

  • Native_of_SL_UT

    If Romney thinks Corsi is a journalist, I know of a fine lawyer he could also hire. I hear Orly Taintz is not so busy right now. She could also clean his teeth in flight.

  • Dumbedup

    Corsi is part of the latest "Plan D" re-launch, which will involve Reverend Wright, Saul Alinski, the Weather Underground and Sara Palin, also. Top secret stuff.

  • HistoriCat

    You know who else wore a crimson fez??

    • http://mbouffant.blogspot.com M. Bouffant

      Kemal Ataturk?

  • Gleem McShineys

    Well, what could possibly go wrong with this plan?

    I mean, who hasn't thought that filling an etch-a-sketch with diarrhea was a great idea?

  • comrad_darkness

    So, when they fly into Hawaii, how many on the plane will ask where the passport control desk is?

  • cybermoe

    I ♥ Rachel.

  • ttommyunger

    Should have known Jerome had a firm hand in the Mittens Campaign. No one can fuck up this bad all on his own.

  • Negropolis

    "Stuff really does actually happen."

    I know it's not supposed to sound profound when someone says this, but in this fucked up world, it is profound. I will praise Rachel forever for calling Politifact and the rest to account and decrying false moral equivalencies.

  • azeyote

    did he strap it to the roof of the plane?