Super-groovy dude and Michele Bachmann BFF Bradlee Dean has some time on his hands since high schools throughout the Midwest stopped paying him to come and make their students cry about being baby-murdering, dirty-wedding-dress-wearing prostitutes. He also still has to pay Rachel Maddow a whole bunch of his greasy cash for having filed a meritless defamation suit against her after she “defamed” him by playing tape of his own words. So what’s he up to lately? Just taking it to today’s equivalent of the Fireside Chats, Facebook, and calling Maddow so gross and ugly, har har har. Which is weird, because look at the current Bradlee Dean?
Here is Bradlee Dean’s clever Facebook posting.
My, that is a bad pic of Rachel Maddow! She looks like a skinny Michael Moore! If people put up a picture like that of us, we would probably be sad! Luckily, Rachel Maddow has the total hots from gay women, straight women, gay men, and non-asshole straight men to keep her warm at night. Bradlee Dean, on the other hand, may well have the hots from a basement full of moldering missing-prostitute bones.
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Does Bradlee have to put a "Baby on Board" sticker on his car when he drives?
The "Romney/Ryan" bumper sticker suffices for that purpose.
Only when he's alone.
The dude on the left is what pot made, the dude on the right is what hate made.
WWJS
Who Would Jesus Sue?
Well — that's a pretty searing indictment of Rachel Maddow's hotness, especially coming from a guy who looks like the sketchy girl's softball coach in an afterschool special.
BEAU BRIDGES LIBEL.
I can't believe you remembered that. Hell, even I didn't remember it was Beau Bridges.
After school specials were my life back in the day. My parents have a lot to answer for.
Wow. I tip my hat to you. All I remember from those after school specials was two kids smoking PCP and driving a car off a cliff going "Wheeeeee!"
You reeled those sheets in though, right? Cuz, sads.
Dude looks like a lady.
Didn't Bradlee used to be the "Breck Shampoo" girl?
No wonder I never see Breck on the shelves anymore.
No, that was John Edwards.
Didn't Bradlee use to be John Edwards?
I know we all have a lot of reasons to be mad at John Edwards, but that was just cruel.
"The woman on teh left is what God made"
Seems as though God now makes blond hair dye.
Also, too: If I were single and Rachael straight, I'd hit it. Repeatedly. And well. Because, for me, smart = HAWT!
Even knowing she's not, I'd buy her a drink and hope for a miracle.
Rach is someone I'd love to have several beers with. No sexytime required.
Oh, don't get me wrong — I'd LOVE to have an in-depth policy discussion with her. For me, that'd like foreplay.
And I'd be perfectly happy to stop right there.
I'd prefer she mix me a drink. She's the reason I got into Sazeracs.
The drink, not the weird sex act.
Twenty years ago I looked better, too. Gravity sucks.
I was semi-cute many years ago. Fuckin' time is a bitch.
My problem was, I didn't think I was cute when I was cute. Now, I am not and I am painfully aware.
Gravity, Smavity!
I hear Isaac Newton had a mullet too…. and he was a flamin' queen too.
Didn't dudes have long hair and wear stockings back in those days? GHEEEEEEEYY!!
Totally! As blonde Rachel would've said.
We're none of us getting any younger. Sigh.
I am actually considering a sex change just so I can be a lesbian with Rachel Maddow.
I took the comment out 'cuz I stole it from another Wonketteer year ago.
'Round here we call that "flattery".
Can't remember if it was Wookies or Lascaux Caveman…
Just keep fisting them both, and stand in awe of their large p-ness, and I'm sure they will be appreciative.
I'm guessing both, but Wooks probably got there :30 before me.
Oh, wait? I'm guessing you're referencing the "Help me, I'm a lesbian trapped in a man's body" thing? That one I stole from a some stand-up comic back in the 80s, I think.
I'm not sure what you said, but I don't mind the appropriation — it's not like I've never done that. But if you called her "my imaginary boyfriend" then that was me.
Whatever. That right picture of Maddow is still totally hot.
Around here, of course, we'd never stoop to making fun of peoples' looks.
Except when it's absolutely necessary.
I wouldn't stoop to that. I do stand-up.
It's the hard work that needs doin'…
Around here, of course, we'd never stoop to making fun of peoples' looks.
We're not looksist.
Short for "Looksie looksie, he's ugly!"
Wow. Maddow was even hotter once?
Wow.
I know… I'd bonk her.
I'd bonk her til I bled and that's now. Back then I would have bonked her til it fell off.
So sez the man whose hair hasn't left the 80s metal band era.
And BTW, that ball cap ain't fooling anyone… baldy.
It seems to be some wingnut thing. All the vomit-inducing gas-bags love to criticize liberal ladies' looks.
ORLY?
Ayn Rand.
Your move.
Coulter? Maitlin?
For reference purposes.
Yikes was that pic from an animal shelter?
Is that Mugly, the world's ugliest dog?
Jan?
Man, is Ted Turner doing that crazy let's colorize all the old black and white movies?
Lots of Sun and Lots of X-Rays can have deleterious effect on one's appearance. So can having a black soul.
I'm a subscriber to the Outside-In theory.
Well, atheist. Duh!
I see your Ayn Rand and also double down with a Maggie Gallagher.
If Rachel Maddow hadn't become liberal, she'd look just like that picture. Just as Ann Coulter looks like her high school graduation picture. And Kathryn Lopez.
Ann Coulter looks like Kathryn Lopez?
On the inside.
Not gonna check; don't wanna go there.
We all know Rachel Maddow pulls way hotter pussy than Dean ever could. Fact.
Brb
A little too much Coulter in the first picture. So, by definition, she looks better in second shot.
This, coming from a guy who looks like Axl Rose ate Tom Sizemore? Okay, then.
And AFTER he came out of Axl's butt, right?
In, out, whichever.
Meatloaf Lite
Well he does have an appetite for destruction…
The Jack Nicholson hairline isn't really working for him, either.
I love you. That was the best description ever.
Bradlee is just pissed because his first name isn't Ben – so he has to lash out at the best journalist currently available in the U.S. of A.
So based on Dean's pix, he was a fairly cute kid but conservatism has turned him into a bloated, Hulk Hogan mullet-wearing fat man with a pock-marked face?
And a sissy party clown. The rodeo clowns should take him out back and beat him like a mime.
It's good to see Shawn Barnish's wireless keyboard still works in the closet.
…and non-asshole straight men.
Actually, not having an asshole is serious problem. Why do you hate the asshole deficient!!!
Aw, hell, is this another charity I need to look into?
People can be so… so… mean! – Vikram Pandit (frowney face)
Bradlee who?
Mr. ponytail, tracksuit and baseball cap does not have any credibility in the “what looks good or bad” department.
Ah, yes, the tell-tale tracksuit…
At least when my male relatives wear track suits, they have the fashion sense to accessorize with fourteen pounds of gold jewelry…
On reflection, I'm not sure that helps, though.
Track suit makes it easier to run away when the cops raid the park he hangs out in.
Bradlee Dean was a pretty girl back in high school. Not sure what happened to her since.
Shawn Barnish said it best:
The girl on the left, is what GOD MADE.
The girl on the right is what happens when God "gives up" a god-hater.
Why does Dean hate God so much?!!
Young Bradlee shore has a purty mouth…
Did he get fat?
Arlen Specter was hotter as a Republican.
I wonder what Bradlee Dean looks like in a prison shower?
I guess we'll find out.
Ms. Dean hasn't exactly aged well herself.
But Bradlee…in God's eyes we're all hot.
Depends on your god. I hear the Xtian god doesn't do sex. In fact he's a boring white dude in white pants and sweater, with a white wife in white pants and white shirt and two white rug-rats, both with blonde hair, white sneakers and perfect teeth.
He lives in the suburbs, drives a Volvo, wears sweater vests [as you Americans call them] and coaches the juniors at soccer, even though he knows fuck-all about it. Apparently, he works "in the city", holds cocktail parties at the weekend, and his girl and boy are to his second – almost perfect- wife, who likes to help at the local church baking pies for the disadvantaged.
His first wife died in mysterious circumstances that he doesn't talk about.
But now the buddhist god…. yee-fucking-haa…. he just loves to party!!
Well?
wears sweater vests [as you Americans call them]
What the hell do you call it?
Sleeveless sweater or sleeveless jumper.
A 'vest' in UK English is er, an undergarment worn by men underneath their shirt.
I think for the US, what we Brits call a vest, you call a wife-beater [possibly?]
A 'vest' in UK English is er, an undergarment worn by men underneath their shirtI'll be damned – all of my time watching BBC shows and I never learned this.
Tiger Beat won't return his calls.
Tiger Beat asked him to please stop stalking their boy band photo shoots.
I"m a librul. Say that to my face, asshole. (Was hot, am old, so?)
To be fair, Bradlee Dean probably hasn't encountered a "beautiful babe" except on the numerous porn sites he visits regularly.
His blow up doll stopped calling him.
"The woman on the right is what happens when God gives up a God hater!"
So, if you hate God you get smart, funny, a lot of admirers but sometimes you take a bad picture. Doesn't sound like a bad deal to me.
Bradlee Dean is an example of perfect male beauty and so he is fit to the way lesser mortals look.
God "gives up"?? Is he calling God a quitter? I fucking hate people that speak for God and I don't even think I'd have a shred of any faith (on days I try to) if it weren't for people like Rachel Maddow. Get a hair cut you old ass nasty Nuge wannabe, you look worse than one of Rachel's ill fitting blazers. I do hate those blazers. But god she is so fucking smart.
He strikes me as more of an "Asshole Rose" aficionado.
Look at them chops, man. (and I bet it's worser when you know what his bald ass looks like without the baseball cap) Even Fat-Axl of the Bo Derek cornrows wouldn't do THAT shit.
Jesse from Eagles Of Death Metal got into a hilarious feud with Asshole a few years ago, and started calling him "Waxl" and "Paxl". I do love EODM, they are funny, though I am incredibly dissapointed that Jesse is a wing nut, or pretending to be. I also can't stand hearing that one kickass song of theirs on all the Miller Light commercials now.
Axle Rose, Asshole Rose, same thing, I thought.
Well, what choice do they have? It's not like God is some big overexposed TV talkshow gabfest celeb who is constantly on ET and Leno and such, mouthing off about all his latest projects, opinions and impressions. He's more the strong, silent (non-existent) type.
I know you're probably right, but I just keep holding out in the hopes of some Old Testament smiting. That would be so funny.
Hey there you are, the living refutation of the suggestion that liberal women ain't beautiful! Its like when Bill gates walks into a bar, the average income of the people in that bar goes up by a billion dollars, when you walk into a room full of liberals, the average beautifulness of the liberals goes up by an order of magnitude.
You are so sweet to me, I do thank you. However, I find most liberals to be MUCH more attractive, something to do with the non-sloping nature of their foreheads and breathing with their mouths closed.
Much less knuckle-walking, too!
What th–…?
Did you just… call the rest of us ugly???
You hush, I was just paying homage to her supernatural beautifulness, not to take away from all you beautiful people.
Wait. Is Bradley Dean admitting he'd fuck a hot lesbian?
Meaning he can't score a straight chick anymore?
"anymore"?
Or any less. Good point
"score"?
I think what he meant was that his chances of getting laid are better with a lesbian than a straight chick.
Close. I meant that since he can't tap any straight chicks, he's hoping for better luck elsewhere.
He'll move onto little boys shortly, I'm sure.
Rachel Maddow and I are the same age, and went school accross the bay from each other. I'm mad that we never crossed paths. She's a bad ass. I would so be friends with her if only just to taste her cocktails.
Heh heh…you said "tails"…. heh heh
"I would so be friends with her if only just to taste her cocktails."
I have never heard it called that before.
Picture #2 looks a lot like Paul Ryan's weightlifting pose. "Yo Bro!"
The most religiously devout people are always the hottest and most youthful babes and visa versa
That photo on the right looks photo shopped. Rachel is much hotter than that
He's not fit to clean Rachel's ratchet set.
She could totally kick his ass, dude.
Headlock in 10 seconds flat.
If Bradlee Dean today is what you look like after a crazed, fanatical obsession with Jeebuzz takes a hold on your life, well, I'm sticking with the atheists.
"The woman on the left is what GOD MADE!"
God also gave us free will to think for ourselves. NO! I'm just kidding.
God put free will in the tree of knowledge and told us to MYOB or else He'd kill us. (Thanks for the safety tip oh loving one.) Eve got a second opinion. Then she decided knowledge is a wonderful thing and she'd rather be wise than immortal. Eve ate the fruit and in so doing she gave us the gift of free will.
(Adam showed up later, saw the fruit had been eaten, knew it meant death for Eve. He ate the fruit because he didn't want to live without her. Adam gave us the gift of love.)
Right. God is, after all, a registered Repugnantcan…
Track suits do little to hide those c-cups he's got.
There is no wall of Marshall amps that can make this asshole look cool.
Looking at Bradley, should I go back to growing my hair our and all long again?
No
No
No
No
No
So you're undecided I take it? :)
no
Wait — what?
Careful… I'm aware of pictorial evidence of someone who traded in their curly locks' appearance for a cinammon-straight, longhaired wig for ringing in the new year. That is the look I was expressing as the potential subject of some regret~
Oh dear — thanks for reminding me. I still have the pics of that somewhere, too.
Are you gonna wear the track suit? If not, don't bother with the hair.
I'm personally glad I gave up the caveman/hobo look, but it's a free country. Thin, fine hair just wasn't working at that length.
I dunno. If you're anything like me you ginger-fro like a motherfucker.
According to Shawn Barnish, the Maddow on the left is the one God made – so apparently primping for a photo, makeup, hair dye and/or wigs, and contacts are holier than just showing up?
RuPaul must be a fucking saint.
Yeah, I'm sure Rachel really cares deeply about what that bigoted shitstain thinks.
Conservatism: Turning beautiful babes into Tom Arnold since 1986.
Bradlee Dean needs to just get a boyfriend already.
NO.
Not it!
What is this fat douchebags claim to fame, tell me, please. Was he the one with the exercise infomercials? A WWE wrestler? The Partridge Family, What?
Wonket comic relief mainstay. Could there be a greater honor?
cf. SkoalRebel, Basil Marceaux.com, Louie Gohmert
I'll have what he's not having.
I do believe that mullet is sewn into his douche-cap.
Fat, Old Rocker is fat and old.
The Nuge approves.
Yes, we all understand the fairness of "Hey, lets compare a person's studio picture in the prime of their innocent hopeful good looking-ness of youth to being disheveled, outdoors thirty years later."
Here's what he looks like without the hat http://www.truthwinsout.org/blog/2012/09/29565/
The track suit really finishes the ensemble.
Joe Don Baker in a Walmart tracksuit.
Ew.. bad enough image but… I was noticing in particular the Steven Seagal-like hairline.
"you better run (cause he'll eat your lunch)
you better hide (your lunch)"
MST3K
MITCHELL!
It's Biff Tannen, casino mogul! Or is that the old Biff Tannen who didn't get the sports almanac?
Hollywood really needs to lay off the sequels – the world does not need Back to the Future IV
Love the term "hate rocker". Sort of like alt, indie, folk, but with hate instead of musicality, proficiency, interest, rhythm, or melody.
Bradley who?
The guy on the left with the tilted head-pose and faux-earnest / sincerity reminds me of another of contemporary Christians' botched ideas of a
rolesoul modelNeedz moar binders.
These Deans and their love of butter is gonna kill them all dead.
No great loss.
Because, to Bradlee Dean, every channel is #amihotornot
Ironic, considering the gut on the left looks like a chick circa 1994 who is struggling with trying to come out of the closet.
Unsurprising, as the guy on the right looks like Larry the Cable Guy's little scro.
I'd hit it.
"It" being "Bradlee Dean"
She looks like a skinny Michael Moore!
She's got the Moore grin, but I think she's totally rockin' the Woody Allen glasses.
The guy that commented on that post is right, God hates aging. Can you believe that she doesn't look exactly like she did 20 years ago? If only she had been a conservative, and then she wouldn't have had to age.
So what, so they both became slightly less attractive women as they've aged, haven't we all?
I'm finding this easier to masturbate to than I'd anticipated.
I'm not entirely happy about that.
I've never quite gotten disparaging a woman's looks as a way of invalidating her opinions, rather than just as a generic insult.
"Rachel Maddow is ugly as sin, therefore I don't want to fuck her" at least makes some kind of sense. I don't say I like it, I don't say I agree, I don't think Brad-Leeee would have a snowball's chance in hell of fucking her even if she were straight… but I get it.
"Rachel Maddow has some really interesting, insightful, and thought-provoking ideas about science/literature/politics/whatever, and I'm inclined to agree with many of them… Oh, no! She's ugly as sin! That cancels everything out!" THAT, I don't get.
But tessiee, what you're forgetting is that women are things.
See Palin, Sarah (conservative fawning over)
God, founder and CEO of Clairol.
Also, Rachel Maddow is hot, and smart, which is also hot, oh, and relevant (ie: hot.)
Unlike our 3 time loser friend Bradlee (which was actually Mattel's backup name if 'Barbie' failed the focus group tests.)
OMG!!
Someone doesn't look as hot as they did in high school???
THIS HAS NEVER HAPPENED BEFORE IN ENTIRE HISTORY OF UNIVERSE!!!
Correct.
That is why no one, ever, cringes at the mention of the very words "High School Yearbook".
Wingnut Conservatisim: Closeting Homosexuals Since Roy Cohn.
Actually, since Frederick the Great of Prussia. But who's really keeping track?
Her old pic looks like someone Joran van der Sloot would've murdered the shit out of.
lulz
Anyone else want to see Rachel2 give it to Rachel1? No? Just me? Carry on…
Nevermind that anyone with enough volume of photos will inevitably get a bad picture every so often. Even if you're a golden-haired angel made entirely of cream with doves fluttering about whenever you enter a room, you'll still look silly if someone gets a high-res photo of you eating a sandwich.
I'm afraid that I would happily do both of those women.
Rachel is gorgeous, inside and out. Period, end of discussion.
And the war on women continues…
This REALLY pisses me off. Her looks have nothing to do with ANYTHING. I don't remember ever hearing that anyone called Keith Olbermann "four eyes" or Chris Matthews "pumpkin head." (My mother does call him "The Interruptor" but that's not about his looks.)
It is just NOT okay to denigrate a woman's opinions or her lifestyle by denigrating her looks. (And of course in this case he's wrong about that, also, too, but that's not the point.)
Total douchebag. Rachel Maddow looks just fine, but that has to be the least important thing about her.
Sigh. Everyday my love of long-haired metalheads erodes a little bit more. Fuckers age like milk.
Winger sucks.
Love the Chas Tenenbaum Track Suit Of Mourning.
I wonder if he filed that doomed, frivolous, bullshit suit against the advice of his attorney. I mean, it never had a chance in hell. Dumbass.
Maybe Dean's hair is like Samson's only in his case it holds all his weakness. Maybe if he just cut the hair he's been holding on to since 1988, he would be free from the weak mind and weak excuses he used for being an addict to pretty much everything under the sun and of course… under the Son.
Good thing Bradlee Dean no longer is working in high schools, seeing how he finds them attractive at that age.
Quit posting pictures of highschool girls on your facebook page, perv-o!
Looks like one of those brothers from Nelson. Yeah, YOU remember it too!
I worked in a smut shop for a few months; Gunnar Nelson came in to return some smut once.
Rachel-on-left looks like a pretty young boy in very uncomfortable drag. Rachel-on-right looks like a human being. But you're right, it would be hot to see them bone.
Anyone named "Bradley" who spells it "Bradlee" probably also dots his i's with little circles or even little hearts.
One of these people can make a killer cocktail in three minutes flat when she's not methodically handing right-wingers their ass on a stick (& plainly enjoying the hell out of it). The other can make a POOPY in his tracksuit on Facebook after losing a lawsuit against the person who's given him far more public exposure than he or his excruciatingly sucktastic "music" ever merited.
bambi_vs_godzilla.gif
Nothing like making fun of another's physical appearance in the name of and on behalf of God. Also, I happen to have the serious hots for Rachel and the Lesbo-Leaning Stepanie Miller, so there. I'm guessing Bradlee couldn't get laid on a troop train full of hookers if he had a duffel bag full of Hundreds.
I think Bob Hope was using that line in the Road movies.
Eddie Izzard?
Pshaw! When I was a young boy, I saw that chiseled in a cave in Lascau–
Wait a second!
As somebody said, the progression is often thus:1. As the great poet John Donne said…2. As a great man once said…3. As I said…
Kneeling in awe will get even more appreciation.
Eddie Izzard is, of course, two lesbians trapped in a man's body. And no so much 80s.
I love those! I think it's "Road to Bali" where out of nowhere a guy walks behind Bob and Bing and fires a shotgun.
Bob says "What was that?" Bing: "That's my brother-in-law. I promised him a shot in my next picture."
Turned out Bing was so cheap he wouldn't pay him (it really was his brother-in-law) and Bob had to do it.
I thought that was Thelma & Louise.
Wasn't that Toonces, the Driving Cat?
Toonces, no!! That marijuana's laced!
When we lived in London, I heard my daughter's English friend in the next room, loudly proclaiming: "He doesn't!! He doesn't!!"
My girl had just told him that when her daddy came home from work, he would take off his pants.
In England, Pants = underwear.
In USA, Pants = trousers, (or in this case, suit pants)
Just for fun, ask Sewollef about "fanny."
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