COCKTOBER  9:15 am October 11, 2012

Attorney For Pat Robertson’s Anti-Gay Legal Outfit Fired For Alleged Wide Stance With (Possibly) Under-Age Boys

by Kris E. Benson

Oh look, a poorly produced video about some guy named “Jim,” a.k.a “our bitch who got us drunk.” (No, not Jim Newell, although we will make him our bitch and let him get us drunk if he asks nicely.) This video is about Jim Henderson, formerly a senior attorney at the American Center for Law and Justice (ACLJ), who was fired by Pat Robertson’s outfit last week for “maybe” being gay.

The American Center for Law & Justice (ACLJ), founded by anti-gay televangelist Pat Robertson and led by Jay Sekulow, confirmed in a statement provided to Metro Weekly that James Henderson, a senior counsel with the group who focused on federal civil rights and constitutional law, had been fired from the group Sept. 25, one day after a report surfaced on a blog that he may be gay.

[…]

ACLJ’s confirmation comes after two blogs — Exposed Politics and The Patriot-Ombudsman — published troves of information about Henderson and his relationship with two younger men. Henderson is married and has eight children.

According to the two bloggers, Henderson used a Facebook account to communicate with the two men. Conversations obtained and published by the two websites indicate that Henderson may have provided the younger men, who appear to be possibly younger than 21, with alcohol and marijuana. The Facebook account cited by the bloggers has since been deleted.

Don’t be sad that the account has been deleted because LUCKILY the Patriot-Ombudsman has screen caps of their conversations with a well-wisher who came forward to object to the coverage of Henderson. (This person is NOT AT ALL Jim Henderson himself, carefully misspelling things, of course.) Turns out, Henderson was a lonely old man! Who WOULDN’T be lonely with a wife, eight kids, and a career? And the 17-year-old took advantage of this vulnerability:

And just in case this isn’t enough to convince everyone, someone went and made a movie about the chat conversations between the “arch-conservative” attorney and his 17 year old (alleged) lover. Yes, it is a movie that is primarily about chat transcripts. But! It includes helpful tips about Facebook chat etiquette and an unexpected soundtrack, so we give it three stars.

[Metro Weekly] [Patriot-Ombudsman]

 
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{ 146 comments }

BaldarTFlagass October 11, 2012 at 9:18 am

Big surprise here.
Next!

memzilla October 11, 2012 at 9:23 am

In other news, water wet, sky blue. More at captainobvious.com.

BaldarTFlagass October 11, 2012 at 9:19 am

What's the age of consent in the Bible?

deanbooth October 11, 2012 at 9:30 am

The Bible took place in the Age of Consent, which was followed by the Age of Reason.

eggsacklywright October 11, 2012 at 10:28 am

9000 years.

Designer_Rants October 11, 2012 at 12:02 pm

Rape? Is "rape" an age?

actor212 October 11, 2012 at 9:20 am

Dude's married with EIGHT KIDS?

No wonder he fucks around with boys. He's a genetic jackhammer!

BaldarTFlagass October 11, 2012 at 9:23 am

Is there a Priapist sect in the Christian Church?

actor212 October 11, 2012 at 9:51 am

Our Lady of the Wooden Dong

Or, the Chuch in the Wood

eggsacklywright October 11, 2012 at 10:56 am

Do they engage in the butt-sects?

actor212 October 11, 2012 at 11:31 am

Right after confession

eggsacklywright October 11, 2012 at 9:58 am

For sermons lasting more than 4 hours…

Toomush_Infer October 11, 2012 at 10:44 am

The Old Oaken Church…

mrblifil October 11, 2012 at 9:33 am

That's no testament to virility. If I hadn't been sufficiently circumspect in my twenties I would have a brood that rivaled the combined output of Bach and Benjamin Franklin.

Also too if a ladyparts person of a certain age tries to conceive shortly after giving birth her chances are really good of getting knocked up again, but pronto. So I'm similarly unimpressed with the efforts of Mrs. Cockgoblin.

actor212 October 11, 2012 at 9:36 am

Listen, I'm just impressed that a Republican fucked his wife eight whole times.

BadKitty904 October 11, 2012 at 9:38 am

He was prolly drunk…

mrblifil October 11, 2012 at 9:44 am

True from that perspective it is a positively Herculean feat.

actor212 October 11, 2012 at 9:50 am

On second thought, did they perform paternity tests or is he a cuckold?

Not_So_Much October 11, 2012 at 10:30 am

In these parts, married with eight kids just means you're a good Mormon.

teebob2000 October 11, 2012 at 10:50 am

Or Zachhammer, as the case may be.

Baconzgood October 11, 2012 at 9:25 am

Now this is the kinda Cocktober I'm talking about!!!!

memzilla October 11, 2012 at 9:26 am

I don't suppose he's a Penn State graduate by any chance?

BaldarTFlagass October 11, 2012 at 9:26 am

I'm at work and don't dare watch that video. Is there nothing at all about snorting meth out of Zach's or Jules' asscrack?

You know it's gonna be a good day at Wonkette when the first post contains the words "receiving anal sex."

Poindexter718 October 11, 2012 at 9:27 am

Wake me up when Cocktober ends!

BadKitty904 October 11, 2012 at 9:28 am

Today's "Captain Louis Renault Award" for hypocrisy goes to…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T1DEG6BWgp0

One_who_wanders October 11, 2012 at 9:41 am

That should be a thing!

Chet Kincaid_ October 11, 2012 at 9:28 am

The background music from the old "Johnny Quest" cartoon is a nice touch, sense it was a show about two unmarried, adventurous men who spent all their time hanging out with young boys.

actor212 October 11, 2012 at 9:38 am

Now now, Dr Quest was a widower…

Goonemeritus October 11, 2012 at 9:41 am

Now that you mention it, that show had a fabulous sense of style.

Chet Kincaid_ October 11, 2012 at 9:47 am

Seem, Seem, Salabeem!

actor212 October 11, 2012 at 9:52 am

That character's name was Haji. A Haj is an Islamic pilgrimage.

Therefore, Brace Bannon was a terrorist!

BadKitty904 October 11, 2012 at 10:03 am

"Brace Bannon" is SO a porn name!

eggsacklywright October 11, 2012 at 10:02 am

Richard Quest, the loudest newsreader on the TV, was aptly named.

sudsmckenzie October 11, 2012 at 10:09 am

Seemed more Crouching Flameball, Hidden Under Age Dude.

HarryButtle October 11, 2012 at 4:32 pm

Timmy Matheson libel!

BaldarTFlagass October 11, 2012 at 9:29 am

I don't know, seems to me that any guy that fathers eight children isn't completely gay. Maybe they should give him the benefit of the doubt.

BadKitty904 October 11, 2012 at 9:30 am

True. Maybe he's just nervous…

Stevola October 11, 2012 at 11:01 am

All we know for certain is that his wife has eight children.

SpeedoFart October 11, 2012 at 1:32 pm

Fundies don't hate bi people?

I call shenanigans!

FNMA October 11, 2012 at 9:29 am

I'm trying to work up some snark about this , but the only thing I can think of this morning is Raul Fucking Ibanez.

actor212 October 11, 2012 at 9:39 am

This should help:

Rooting for the Yankees to win another championship is like rooting for Mitt Romney to close another factory and outsource jobs.

And not surprisingly, there's a large overlap between those sets.

One_who_wanders October 11, 2012 at 9:42 am

As a Baltimoron I approve of this message!

actor212 October 11, 2012 at 9:55 am

As a New Yorker, I'd want to root for the Yankees, but that would make me the lowest of creatures, a Yankees fan. As a liberal and an egalitarian (when I pitch, I try to get ground balls…as that great philosopher Crash Davis instructs, it's good for democracy) I am a proud Mets fan.

One_who_wanders October 11, 2012 at 10:20 am

Better that Ibanez should beat us than ARod.

LibertyLover October 11, 2012 at 10:08 am

Blame the coach… If he'd have left A-Rod in the game, the Yanks would have lost for sure. A-Rod has only had one good post season in all the time he's been in baseball.

Stevola October 11, 2012 at 11:02 am

Rauuuul!

Mumbletypeg October 11, 2012 at 9:29 am

who was fired by Pat Robertson’s outfit last week for “maybe” being gay

To "maybe" be or not to maybe be gay.
That is the questio…nable way of sizing up someone's sexual orientation for target practice.

AlterNewt October 11, 2012 at 9:30 am

This is giving hypocrisy a bad name.

Mumbletypeg October 11, 2012 at 9:32 am

No, not Jim Newell, although we will make him our bitch

Who?

actor212 October 11, 2012 at 9:39 am

Her?

LibertyLover October 11, 2012 at 10:03 am

She's been there the whole time.

GregComlish October 11, 2012 at 10:03 am

"Jim Newell" is Rebecca Schoenkopf's drag name.

NellCote71 October 11, 2012 at 2:05 pm

I thought Rebecca Schoenkopf was her drag name.

Tommmcatt_Again October 11, 2012 at 12:08 pm

Jim Newell is the official Wonkette catamite. He claims I cyber-stalk him but you have to read between the lines on those court orders.

Jim, call me!

bobbert October 11, 2012 at 12:23 pm

It's nice to see you back.

BadKitty904 October 11, 2012 at 9:32 am

Well, it's not like it isn't common knowledge that twinkies are bad for you…

eggsacklywright October 11, 2012 at 9:48 am

Ho-ho's are OK if they have a heart o'gold.

BaldarTFlagass October 11, 2012 at 9:53 am

You don't even want to know how those things get their cream filling.

BadKitty904 October 11, 2012 at 9:59 am

Isn't that kinda what got ol' Jim fired in the first place?

eggsacklywright October 11, 2012 at 10:04 am

Keep fuckin' that HO-HO.

LibertyLover October 11, 2012 at 10:05 am

Sounds like Jim Henderson is more into Ding Dongs….

outragedcitizen October 11, 2012 at 9:34 am

Hurray! I was afraid we weren't going to have Cocktober this year!

NellCote71 October 11, 2012 at 2:06 pm

Agreed. A year without Cocktober is a year without cock.

BaldarTFlagass October 11, 2012 at 9:34 am

This guy gets fired, but Lindsay Graham keeps getting re-elected. What the fuck?

Chet Kincaid_ October 11, 2012 at 9:43 am

Keep fucking those ham biscuits!

trampndirtdown October 11, 2012 at 10:06 am

Now now, you boys stop picking on Aunt Lindsay, she has a glandular condition.

Goonemeritus October 11, 2012 at 9:36 am

“Jim Henderson, formerly a senior attorney at the American Center for Law and Justice (ACLJ), who was fired by Pat Robertson’s outfit last week for “maybe” being gay.”

Do you think he will be filing a lawsuit for this obvious case of sexual bias in the workplace?

BlueMonkeh October 11, 2012 at 4:51 pm

The liberal part of me says I hope this hypocrite sues the ever-living shit out of this horrible consortium. But then the other liberal part of me says "serves that fucker right for being a closet gay and working for this horrible consortium!"

Chichikovovich October 11, 2012 at 9:36 am

Sorry, gang, but I'm afraid that this video is obviously worthless and untrustworthy, since it describes Regent School of Law as "prestigious".

Frankly that calls into question everything else it contains.

(And they forget the quotation marks in the school's name, which is Regent "School" of "Law" .)

Spurning Beer October 11, 2012 at 9:57 am

But "regent" is something classy, isn't it?

eggsacklywright October 11, 2012 at 10:30 am

I think you need one to make meth.

Oblios_Cap October 11, 2012 at 9:38 am

So Henderson likes his salad tossed. What's the big deal?

Chet Kincaid_ October 11, 2012 at 9:42 am

Child labor laws.

Indiepalin October 11, 2012 at 9:38 am

Coincidentally, the title of the new Dylan album is "Shit On My Dick"

BigSkullF*ckingDog October 11, 2012 at 9:42 am

This makes me miss the good old days of Larry Craig and whats his name with the pages. Why can't I remember his name? They don't make gay hypocrites like they used to.

eggsacklywright October 11, 2012 at 9:51 am

Mark Foley. Paging Mark Foley.

Isyaignert October 11, 2012 at 11:35 am

Mark Foley to Larry Craig, "Which page are you on?"

Esteev October 11, 2012 at 10:23 am

Broke the mold, so to speak.

qwerty42 October 11, 2012 at 9:42 am

And so Cocktober begins …

sbj1964 October 11, 2012 at 9:42 am

Noah fresh off the boat plants a vineyard then gets drunk; his son Ham ass rapes him then Noah condemns his grandson Canaan to slavery."Noah knew what Ham had done unto him"?Nothing new here.Typical fundie Butsecs.Pat is just keeping a tradition alive.Christians have been fucking young boys since Jesus was caught with a young naked boy Mark 14:51.Late at night in a garden?Wow! Why would they leave that in the book/Bible?

glasspusher October 11, 2012 at 9:42 am

I tried pot once. Made me want to rape and kill.

eggsacklywright October 11, 2012 at 9:52 am

Turned me into a natural born cruller.

actor212 October 11, 2012 at 10:05 am

Me and the shrink jumping up and down on the Group W bench…

glasspusher October 11, 2012 at 10:28 am

Kid, we don't like your kind…

Esteev October 11, 2012 at 10:23 am

I tried it once 10 years ago and have been pillaging evar since.

HarryButtle October 11, 2012 at 4:35 pm

Funny…it's the only thing that keeps me from raping and killing!

(well not so much the rapey part, but it most certainly has saved the lives of the many fucktards who have crossed my path)

starfanglednut October 11, 2012 at 9:43 am

Completely OT:

Every time I come to my wonkette, I keep getting a pop up that says:

"adobe flash payer has stopped a potentially unsafe operation. The following local application on your computer or network:

/about/blank

is trying to communicate with this internet-enabled location:

ds.serving-sys.com "

Any of our resident computer geniuses know what this is and how I can get rid of it? It's driving me mental(er).

glasspusher October 11, 2012 at 10:07 am

Get rid of Flash. It's a POS on the Mac. You won't miss it. Download and use Chrome for the few times you need it. You won't miss the flashing Flash based ads, either.

sudsmckenzie October 11, 2012 at 10:20 am

If it makes you feel better, I've had weird crashes here lately on my PC. I actually tracked it down to total whoring out to advertisers, not that there's anything wrong with that, with votes (just fucked up cookies and add ons).

Studebaker Hawk October 11, 2012 at 9:44 am

What ever happened to innocent until proven guilty? He may not be homosexual at all. He could just be a pedophile.

eggsacklywright October 11, 2012 at 9:53 am

I'm a pedophobe. Children scare the shit out of me.

BadKitty904 October 11, 2012 at 10:09 am

"I love children. With mustard."

Weenus299 October 11, 2012 at 9:58 am

Or worse! A librul spy.

Tundra Grifter October 11, 2012 at 10:03 am

SH:

THANK YOU! Not to be too serious here, but there is all the difference in the world between being gay and being a child molester. Or a statutory rapist.

Chet Kincaid_ October 11, 2012 at 10:52 am

You guys are assuming there's such a thing as a "generic pedophile" who will prey on kids regardless of gender? I've never heard of that.

Tundra Grifter October 11, 2012 at 11:27 am

CK:

I'm saying sick fucks who want to have sex with children are sick fucks who want to have sex with children. It doesn't make any difference if the rapist is a man or a woman, or if the victims are boys or girls.

It's either child molestation or statutory rape. It isn't homosexual or heterosexual. It's a crime.

Calling such criminals "gay" is just another slur we don't need in 2012. Or 1912. Or 1812…

Studebaker Hawk October 11, 2012 at 12:06 pm

"Sexual abuse of young boys is perpetrated more often by heterosexual males rather than homosexual males." Source: http://www.ph.ucla.edu/sciprc/pdf/CHILD_ABUSE.pdf

SpeedoFart October 11, 2012 at 1:36 pm

Okay, but does 17 years old count as a "young boy"? Skeezy as shit, yes. But pedo?

EatsBabyDingos October 11, 2012 at 9:46 am

I like Cocktober because it means it's almost Boobember.

BaldarTFlagass October 11, 2012 at 9:46 am

Semi-related to the topic: Do you think the "starburst" pattern of our sphincters is unique, like snowflakes and fingerprints? There's a master's thesis in there somewhere, but I don't think I'd want to do the field research.

Chet Kincaid_ October 11, 2012 at 9:49 am

I don't know, sounds like you would, if you have given it this much thought.

MacRaith October 11, 2012 at 9:51 am

There appear to be plenty of conservative anti-gay lawyers and politicians who would be more than willing to do the research for you. Some of them already have years of data.

eggsacklywright October 11, 2012 at 10:07 am

Sure. Anal scanners are just like iris scanners.

AbandonHope_ October 11, 2012 at 10:18 am

Sure, you start postulating theories like this, and pretty soon we all have to drop our pants at the airport for the anal security scan.

What I'm saying here is to back away, slowly, and forget this topic ever existed.

Toomush_Infer October 11, 2012 at 10:55 am

I think you should get behind it…

Roy Hobbson October 11, 2012 at 9:48 am

Pat Robertson's wicked & depraved ACLJ will now get evaporated with a fire tornado or some such wrath of God, right? Pat?? Isn't that how this works?

BaldarTFlagass October 11, 2012 at 9:55 am

This ACLJ should now be hit by a Cat 5 hurricane or a Muslim-piloted airliner, right?

BadKitty904 October 11, 2012 at 9:50 am

I will never, for the life o' me, get the whole "boy-boinking" thing. Doing homework is not my idea of a hot date and I have no idea what wine goes with peanut-butter.
Give me a MANLY man, every time…

cassamandra October 11, 2012 at 9:56 am

Hm. Not sure. Anybody who calls that heap of junk "a prestigious university" can clearly not be trusted.

Weenus299 October 11, 2012 at 9:57 am

Isn't today National Maybe-Coming-Out Day? National Coming Out Almost Day? National Should-Come-Out-Because-Everybody-Else-Is-Thinking-You-Are Day?

harriedhubby October 11, 2012 at 9:57 am

As the person who created the poorly-produced video, I thank Wonkette for running it and invite your readers to another, more complete, and even (if possible) MORE poorly produced video on the same subject.
http://patriot-ombudsman.com/501/the-james-hender

Thank you for your love.

I am also raising money to find a male prostitute who will out James J. Fischer of the American Family Association. If you can contribute to the fund…
http://patriot-ombudsman.com/649/hey-young-male-h

actor212 October 11, 2012 at 10:07 am

We're all about the bad visuals. You should see the photos from our Drinky Thingies. If they're in focus, it's an accident

Chet Kincaid_ October 11, 2012 at 10:54 am

The chat transcripts were too damn small to read.

harriedhubby October 11, 2012 at 11:01 am

Let me help. Larger, complete transcripts posted here.
http://patriot-ombudsman.com/46/the-double-life-o

Toomush_Infer October 11, 2012 at 10:57 am

Is that you, Jim?…

sudsmckenzie October 11, 2012 at 10:00 am

In a Rest Stop, Far Far Away …..

Its just nice to see Sanjaya workin …

LibertyLover October 11, 2012 at 10:11 am

For some reason, I have a strange urge to tap my foot….

LibertyLover October 11, 2012 at 10:02 am

Maybe those 8 kids aren't his…

BadKitty904 October 11, 2012 at 10:08 am

Either way, given Dad's alleged "hobby," the local Children's Services agency may want to have a little chat with them…

LibertyLover October 11, 2012 at 10:05 am

Needz moar hypocrites….

HempDogbane October 11, 2012 at 10:07 am

I won't rest until the "maybe gay" citizen can live freely, pursuing happiness with their wife and maybe 8 children.

harriedhubby October 11, 2012 at 10:10 am

BTW: I know that people dial up the Wonkette on the Computerola to get educated. So here's some bona fide edumakayshun.

I don't think Henderson's gay. As I worked on this story, I learned about a condition known as "epehebophilia." We all have it to a degree — the attraction to young adolescents. But there are men who are clearly heterosexual who find themselves attracted to the feminine characteristics of young, gay men who adopt a feminine appearance. This is entrenched in culture, both ancient and contemporary.

Who hasn't seen Elmer Fudd get a boner when Buggs Bunny puts on a dress and makeup?

That being said, a 53-year old man buying pot for anyone (although a nice gesture) is always illegal. A 53-year old man buying booze for people under the age of 21 is always illegal. A 53-year old man hanging out with 18-year old boys is kinda creepy (unless you're a coach of some sort). And a 53-year old with a wife and 8 kids man paying boys between the age of 18-and 20 to play "hide your salami" is adultery and creepy, but not illegal (well, in Virginia it is, but generally in civilized society…)

But a 53-year old man paying a 17-year old to fill his tender cakey outside with a creamy gooey inside? That's agin' the law, scooter! Age of consent is 18 in the Dominion.

But thank you again, Wonkette, for being the first non-LGBTQ website (other than mine and Exposed Politics) to run this story. You are all invited to join me at http://patriot-ombudsman where I will be serving cake and punch.

LibertyLover October 11, 2012 at 10:16 am

Know what other "coach" liked hanging out with young boys?

harriedhubby October 11, 2012 at 10:32 am

Anyone who ever coached the Dallas Cowboys?

eggsacklywright October 11, 2012 at 10:37 am

The one that turned into a pumpkin in Sleeping Booty?

Chet Kincaid_ October 11, 2012 at 10:47 am

That "epehebophilia" sounds like some horseshit dreamed up to save gay face and cover for the fact that it's easier to seduce a boy than a grown man, but I could be wrong.

bobbert October 11, 2012 at 12:30 pm

Evidently Greek for "down low".

GregComlish October 11, 2012 at 11:51 am

"epehebophilia"? is that like a thing for teen shemales?

harriedhubby October 11, 2012 at 12:01 pm

It can be same sex, as in this case, or hetero, like in "American Beauty." But in this case, the only two lads I am aware of seem to have been young amateur male hookers who hooked up with Henderson on the net and because they were nearby, got to play "hide the kielbasa" with him for booze, pot, and valuable cash prizes. I know he also had online relationships with youngish lads. And if other local laddies would like to come forward and be counted, we will be happy to talk to them.

In fact, anyone who has ANY information about this story should write to me at bill (at) patriot-ombudsman (dot) com.

LibertyLover October 11, 2012 at 10:14 am

People still have MySpace pages?

Francis Urquhart October 11, 2012 at 10:20 am

The pedarests always appear at the most inconvenient times. They really must be more discreet.

sudsmckenzie October 11, 2012 at 10:29 am

Anyone want to make $14 the Hard Way?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5dgxzItaQzw

Everybody. … lets dance

An_Outhouse October 11, 2012 at 10:34 am

This is a blog. Can't it surface a report and get more nut jobs fired? Please?

ElPinche October 11, 2012 at 10:36 am

Smells like Cocktober is here!
Not just any ordinary Cocktober. This is shit-on-the-dick-tip Cocktober.

docterry6973 October 11, 2012 at 11:14 am

"…although we will make him our bitch and let him get us drunk if he asks nicely."

Uh, pretty please with sugar on top?

LibrarianX October 11, 2012 at 11:24 am

No airport restroom naming opportunities, huh?

widestanceromance October 11, 2012 at 11:30 am

For the record, I had no romance with under-age boys even when I was an under-age boy.

ttommyunger October 11, 2012 at 12:36 pm

"receiving anal sex." , or- voting Republican.

I_P October 11, 2012 at 1:25 pm

Cocktober makes its triumphant return. Huzzah!!1!

LibrarianX October 11, 2012 at 3:06 pm

Pat Robertson is still alive? And Captain Beefheart is dead?

There is no God.

SoBeach October 11, 2012 at 10:00 am

I had a nasty trojan last month that had similar behavior. I agree some scanning should be done. I finally got rid of mine with the free Avast software.

actor212 October 11, 2012 at 10:06 am

Given that Apple has all but abandoned support for Adobe Flash, it wouldn't surprise me.

AbandonHope_ October 11, 2012 at 10:41 am

Oh yeah, Avast is pretty nice too, provided you turn off the loud, weirdly accented announcement saying "VIRUS DATABASE HAS BEEN UPDATED". Or have they gotten rid of that? I don't actually use anti-virus software, I just run anti-spyware apps occasionally. "Viruses" in the traditional sense are nearly extinct these days compared to trojans, hijackers, et cetera; all the criminals switched when they found it was far easier to just have humans spread the malware for them, instead of trying to have the program do it automatically.

Chet Kincaid_ October 11, 2012 at 10:44 am

Only on iOS devices. Flash works fine on Macs.

Chet Kincaid_ October 11, 2012 at 10:51 am

It's "Race Bannon."

actor212 October 11, 2012 at 11:31 am

Brite me.

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