cocktober

Detroit Police Chiefs Just Can’t Stop Doing Sex On Their Lady Cops

teen suicide, don't do it!Well yikes, etc.! Pictured above is Detroit internal affairs (heh?) officer Angelica Robinson, who tweeted this angsty self-portrait after finding out that her lover, Detroit Police Chief Ralph Godbee, was sexin’ on someone else. Robinson, as you might have guessed, has had her service weapon removed from her possession, WHICH SEEMS LIKE A GOOD IDEA. Godbee? He’s been suspended. Wait, is it 2010 again? No, that was when the last Detroit chief of police, Warren Evans, got canned for porking his subordinate.

Evans, a former Wayne County sheriff, was appointed chief by [Mayor Dave] Bing in 2009 and fired after he raised the mayor’s ire by taking part in a promotional video for a cable police reality show. Bing later said he also fired Evans because the chief was romantically involved with Lt. Monique Patterson.

Godbee, too, had a romantic relationship with Patterson before she began dating Evans and when she was Godbee’s subordinate.

The prior relationship between Godbee and Patterson was disclosed publicly after Godbee was named interim chief, and Bing issued a strongly worded statement after its disclosure saying he wasn’t considering firing Godbee for having an affair with a subordinate.

Assistant Chief Chester Logan will assume Godbee’s responsibilities during the suspension, Bing said.

But has Chester Logan ever boned a subordinate? And has he done sex on Lt. Monique Patterson? It seems like someone should really find out.

[DailyMail]

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110 comments

    1. Negropolis

      Oh, trust me, in Detroit, the police do brutality proper and right-like. The department ain't under FBI monitoring for nothing. Speaking of which, Mayor Kilpatrick was porking the FBI monitor just to show you how corrupt the town is.

  1. Government_Job

    Wait, there are folks still left in Detroit to police?

    Oh, well. President Romney will sell it off to China.

        1. JadedPreppy

          I used to consult for BET. This sounds like a typical day at their corporate office, so they would definitely do it right.

  2. Will_Panic

    Maybe put saltpeter on their donuts and they can stop boning long enough to fight some crime.

    I know "donuts" is cliche'. I'm sorry. But cops do eat donuts, right?

    1. BarackMyWorld

      SIMPSON BOWLES DODD FRANK SIMPSON BOWLES DODD FRANK SIMPSON BOWLES DODD FRANK SIMPSON BOWLES DODD FRANK SIMPSON BOWLES DODD FRANK SIMPSON BOWLES DODD FRANK SIMPSON BOWLES DODD FRANK SIMPSON BOWLES DODD FRANK SIMPSON BOWLES DODD FRANK SIMPSON BOWLES DODD FRANK SIMPSON BOWLES DODD FRANK SIMPSON BOWLES DODD FRANK …bang!

  3. coolhandnuke

    Chester Logan has one of those Boogie Nights names.
    Ralph Godbee has one of those Mayberry RFD names.

  4. Mumbletypeg

    If she was serious, I'd say someone alert Demi Moore. She has experience with talking fragile minded tightrope walkers out of drastic measures, via teh twitterz.
    Of course then she herself almost overdosed with her post-breakup plunge into inner turmoil, which I'm reminded of every time Ashton flirts and winks at giggling gaggles of fawning young women himself, with his Minolta or whichever camera brand made him their spokesperson.

      1. Mumbletypeg

        You know, though (and agreed, my family has tended to prefer Nikon all these years), quality comparisons aside — I have to hand it to whoever developed the catch phrase, "Only From The Mind Of Minolta"; I can still remember the guy's voice from the tv ads. I have tried without looking any up online, and cannot recall another camera brand slogan, [ruling out film manufacturers like 'Kodak moment'], unless it says more about my brain where a given jingle lodges than it does about the jingle-maker itself.

        1. James Michael Curley

          So what is it saying when one watches a complete, vey crafted commercial with a nice little plot and one can’t remember what the product was.

  5. mrpuma2u

    Office relationship always = FAIL
    Office relationship in occupation where everyone has guns = TRAGIC EPIC FAIL
    Sheesh.

  6. ttommyunger

    I retired just in time ('83). Very few females in the field at that time. I had maybe 4 or five out of 3,000 Recruits through the Academy during my time there ('71-'79). I only had to supervise one or two-ever. Other Departments and Agencies were already experiencing the problem: female cop with female cop=fighting; male cop with female cop=fucking.

    1. actor212

      Say, I used to solve simultaneous equations in high school! Lemme give this a whirl…

      female cop with female cop=fighting; male cop with female cop=fucking.

      Awesome!

    2. delaney_blom

      You really opened the door for Wonketteers' wild police fantasies.

      male cop with male cop = fighting (crime!)

      male cop with male cop = fucking (minorities!)

          1. ttommyunger

            Alas, she is among the Billions who will escape my tender mercies.Sent from the Field, not in Garrison.

  7. delaney_blom

    For an erection lasting longer than 4 hours, find your nearest subordinate in internal affairs

    1. UnholyMoses

      It's always odd when someone deletes a comment, only to find out someone had replied beforehand.

      So +1 for being fast.

      (The original joke was stale, IMHO. Pun totally intended.)

    1. Tundra Grifter

      Based on Google Images, I'd go with Angelica. However, we all know that when it's right there, it's right there…

  8. FakaktaSouth

    Man I like the kinds of sexy-triangulations that DON'T end up with a gun in your mouth much much better.

  9. Texan_Bulldog

    Between this & the woman who texted nekkid pics of herself & is sleeping with her first cousin (and the thought of Mittens becoming president), I am afeared for this country.

    1. FakaktaSouth

      And these are the people RUNNING things. They need to do whatever they do behind closed doors or in front of camera phones much better so it doesn't creep over into their jobs.

  10. Terry

    Dave Bing, the mayor of Detroit and an honest man by every account, has a tough row to hoe with that city.

    1. Negropolis

      The problem is that he's even more hands-off and introverted than our president in a city where you have to scream just to be heard. Bing was never the right man for the job, and Detroiters were tricked by "I'm a businessman, I'll run the city ike a business" schtick that's become so popular, these days, across the aisle. Well, he found out very quickly that you can't run a city like a business, especially one as far gone as Detroit, which is basically going-out-of-business sale if you're going to compare it to a business.

  11. GunToting[Redacted]

    Nice to see that they are staying current and buying American (Smith and Wesson M&P). I don't thing the grip displayed is part of the normal SW training program, tho…

  12. Guppy

    Do you have to be mentally unstable to be a lady cop in Detroit, or does it just help?

    Meanwhile, Detroit seems to be having trouble finding a chief who doesn't treat the department as his own personal harem. Perhaps they should instead strive to live up to the example of the former Mayor Kilpatrick.

    (Seriously, when did Detroit become part of Florida?)

    1. Negropolis

      You know what's crazy? It's not just the men. Detroit had a female chief under Kilpatrick (zing!), and she was in a relationship with future police chief Warren Evans who is mentioned above, and it was rumored she was having an affair with the mayor.

      Political incest is a problem, to say the least. Everyone is connected in some way or the other.

  13. Pithaughn

    Holy shit!! Don't put pictures like that on the front page you Wonk editors. Sheesh. NSFW and so forth.

  14. thefrontpage

    DETROIT MAYOR'S OFFICE
    PRESS OFFICE
    PRESS RELEASE
    FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
    OCTOBER 4, 2012

    Detroit (October 4, 2012)–Detroit Mayor Dave Bing has announced his choices for candidates to succeed his suspended police chief. "I have consulted with several top experts nationwide, and I feel comfortable that these talented men and women would be excellent candidates for police chief," Bing said in a statement. Bing's choices for Detroit police chief are: Arnold Schwarzenegger, Eliot Spitzer, John Edwards, Gary Hart, Newt Gingrich, Jenna Jameson, and Mark Foley.

  15. Negropolis

    You want to know the sad thing about this? Crime has been so out of control in Detroit City for so many decades, now, that this "scandal" has gotten a collective "meh" from the citizenry. As far as they are concerned, the chief may as well be a Coney dog, because it's the same shit different year.

    What's even more sad is that Godbee was seen early on as one of the good guys. He's incredibly personable, but was always in way over his head.

    Godbee, you should have known this is what happens when you find a stranger in the Alps…

    "Some pig", indeed.

Comments are closed.