REAL AMERICA  11:20 am October 4, 2012

Walmart Strike Means No More Cedar Cheese or Those Cakes We Like

by Kris E. Benson

Wage thievery Today is a sad day for lovers of cedar cheese and those cakes we like because of the Walmart strike. The Walmart strike has, of course, been covered at length in the Labor section of your local newspaper so you are surely familiar with the details, except HA HA, just kidding! You probably don’t have a local newspaper anymore, and the liberal media doesn’t concern itself with trifling issues like “labor,” and if you are reading Wonkette you are probably not a Real American so you probably have not noticed that your local Walmart is maybe closed. (Yes, you have a local Walmart even though you don’t have a local newspaper.)

Today, for the first time in Walmart’s fifty-year history, workers at multiple stores are out on strike… Walmart is entirely union-free in North America, and has worked aggressively to stay that way…

Interviewed yesterday, University of California labor historian Nelson Lichtenstein predicted that in the event of a Walmart employee strike, public relations would play a bigger role in restricting Walmart’s response than any legal restrictions. If a work stoppage mustered “a substantial number of the workers” in a store, he said, then “a tougher response would be a PR disaster.” … [If] workers at one Walmart store went on strike indefinitely, [he added] “they’d just close the store, period. And it would be open with a whole new workforce in a week or two. And then it would be litigated for the next three years…” On the other hand, he said, “If every month or so, the workers at a Walmart store walked out, like a three-hour walkout, and then they went back in, that would have tremendous impact.” Brief walk-outs have happened at US Walmart stores in the past, but they’ve never involved multiple stores.

Workers are striking for better conditions, asserting that “No one should come to work and endure extreme temperatures, inhale dust and chemical residue, and lift thousands of boxes weighing up to 250 lbs with no support. Workers never know how long the work day will be—sometimes its two hours, sometimes it’s 16 hours.” CLEARLY they have not realized that they should just be grateful to have a job, especially serving people as successful as the Walton family.
[Salon]

 

Hola wonkerados.

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{ 207 comments }

nounverb911 October 4, 2012 at 11:22 am

This is good news for Michelle Obama's plan to rid the country of fat asses.

actor212 October 4, 2012 at 11:44 am

She won't succeed. There will be Republicans, always

Negropolis October 5, 2012 at 1:57 am

She's actually teamed up with Walmart to get more fresh fruits and vegetables in them. I guess they've taken the "if you can't beat 'em, join 'em" tactic.

ChernobylSoup October 4, 2012 at 11:23 am

Mitt Romney says there's no such thing as Walmart.

WhatTheHeck October 4, 2012 at 11:58 am

Maybe he once parked his plane in a WalMart parking lot but just forgot about it.

GunToting[Redacted] October 4, 2012 at 1:37 pm

Doesn't WalMart allow overnight plane parking for people traveling our great nation?

actor212 October 4, 2012 at 12:31 pm

THAT'S NOT WHAT HE SAID!

He said that if there WAS a Wal-mart and it would increase the deficit, then he wouldn't propose it!

ibwilliamsi October 4, 2012 at 12:48 pm

Just because Mitt has never been to Walmart doesn't mean that it doesn't exist. He said the same thing about oral sex. Don't listen to him, a man who doesn't believe in oral sex can't be trusted!

ChillBill October 4, 2012 at 11:23 am

This is bad news for peopleofwalmart.com.

James Michael Curley October 4, 2012 at 11:50 am

I think there is another called walmartians.com. But either is too painful to look at.

CindynEncinitas October 4, 2012 at 12:55 pm

How will I keep in touch with my relatives in Oklahoma without it?

tessiee October 4, 2012 at 2:01 pm

That's why they have facebook.

hagajim October 4, 2012 at 11:24 am

I will have to check and see if my Walmart is closed when I go home – just so I can laugh if it is.

eggsacklywright October 4, 2012 at 11:24 am

Fuck Mallwart. Never been, never will.

mrpuma2u October 4, 2012 at 12:16 pm

i have boycotted them since the early 90's when I found out what a sleazebag entity they were.

Swampgas_Man October 4, 2012 at 11:07 pm

Used to work there. Never again!

OK, mostly because I got fired for getting sick too often, but still. . . . PRINCIPLES!

Negropolis October 5, 2012 at 1:58 am

You are a rarity. They've become so ubiquitous that even liberals end up in them from time to time, usually at the behest of a clueless family member that won't go anywhere else, or because they are the only option in some towns.

PubOption October 4, 2012 at 11:24 am

What will Honey Boo Boo do?

Fred_Wertham_Jr October 4, 2012 at 11:27 am

Where the hell am I supposed to buy cat food and Depends for my Mom, then?

actor212 October 4, 2012 at 11:29 am

Home Depot? You can use a drop cloth for the diapers, and cats will eat rhododendrons.

They'll die, but not of starvation

Pragmatist2 October 4, 2012 at 11:33 am

Your Mom eats cat food?

freakishlywrong October 4, 2012 at 11:35 am

So will yours, and you, if the Republics get their way.

MissTaken October 4, 2012 at 11:43 am

If the Republicans get their way we'll be begging for cat food.

Negropolis October 5, 2012 at 1:59 am

This. Not even catfood will be assured. It'll be hung above us like catnip.

actor212 October 4, 2012 at 11:43 am

So will you, whether they do or not

Chow Yun Flat October 4, 2012 at 11:45 am

And be happy that you have it

WhatTheHeck October 4, 2012 at 12:01 pm

but the downside is you have to take a dump in a litterbox afterwards.

actor212 October 4, 2012 at 11:28 am

Cedar cheese is crunchy!

LibertyLover October 4, 2012 at 11:40 am

And smells of cedar… it keeps the moths away.

WhatTheHeck October 4, 2012 at 12:03 pm

and you can tell how old the cheese is by counting the rings of mold around it.

kittensdontlie October 4, 2012 at 12:55 pm

I have a cheddar chest to store my cedar cheese in and have no problem with mold or moths.

tessiee October 4, 2012 at 2:02 pm

I heard that there are no moths anywhere in your wite kasul.

LibertyLover October 4, 2012 at 3:38 pm

Your chest is made of cheddar????

kittensdontlie October 4, 2012 at 5:47 pm

I am not at will to discuss the particulars because it's trademarked.

Negropolis October 5, 2012 at 2:00 am

I bet you it's from Lebanon. Damned Muslins.

Estproph October 4, 2012 at 11:29 am

WalMart employees are expected to be so grateful for their jobs that they should come in to work for nothing.

mrpuma2u October 4, 2012 at 12:17 pm

Just like they worked for nothing many times before!
http://www.nytimes.com/2002/06/25/us/suits-say-wa

Pres.Beeblebrox October 4, 2012 at 11:30 am

I, for one, hope this doesn't mean a shortage of frozen White Kasuls.

Oblios_Cap October 4, 2012 at 11:57 am

Will there be any musturds to put on them?

actor212 October 4, 2012 at 12:06 pm

We'll have to buy gray poopon.

randcoolcatdaddy October 4, 2012 at 11:30 am

Strikes at multiple Walmarts? When the heck did I wake up in some European country?

Will_Panic October 4, 2012 at 11:38 am

Glenn Beck probably had a first-thing-in-the-morning pants shitting.

tessiee October 4, 2012 at 2:03 pm

Like he does most days?

SpeedoFart October 4, 2012 at 11:31 am

No snark here, just admiring the huge brass balls of the workers willing to take on the country's largest employer.

Lascauxcaveman October 4, 2012 at 1:21 pm

Brass balls, or just the realization that your work conditions are going to put you in the hospital, with no health insurance?

Shittiest job in the world isn't much to lose.

SpeedoFart October 4, 2012 at 1:26 pm

When there's virtually no safety net and no other jobs to be had, hell yes it's a lot to lose.

doloras October 4, 2012 at 4:18 pm

"Shittiest job in the world isn't much to lose. "

Isn't that from the last page of the Communist Manifesto?

Negropolis October 5, 2012 at 2:01 am

Completely agree. If this ever gets coverage, the battle that ensues could be epic.

freakishlywrong October 4, 2012 at 11:32 am

How much do the Walmartians pay in State taxes to Walmart? (I do not go).

tessiee October 4, 2012 at 2:05 pm

Between the ER visits for the employees with no insurance, and the incarceration for the clientele, they pretty much end up costing us tax money.

JerkCade October 4, 2012 at 11:32 am

ABOUT DAMN TIME!!

FNMA October 4, 2012 at 11:33 am

True story: One of my old friends, a World War II vet and labor guy who, even though he's in his '80s, could kick all of our asses, told me the only time he goes to Wal Mart is to take a shit. If he is out driving around and has to crap, he finds the closest Wal Mart.

BaldarTFlagass October 4, 2012 at 11:38 am

When I used to travel to Europe a lot for work, I would often have to change planes at Paris-DeGaulle. I would do the same thing as your veteran friend. I hate that fucking airport.

Negropolis October 5, 2012 at 2:02 am

The entire thing smells like piss. I remember flying in there in the early 00's, and it looked straight out of the third world. Maybe it was Orly, but I really think it was DeGaulle.

SexySmurf October 4, 2012 at 11:38 am

But they don't have public bathrooms at. . .ohhhhhhh.

MissTaken October 4, 2012 at 11:46 am

Hey! That was on the Walmart shopping list – 1 Mus turd

coolhandnuke October 4, 2012 at 12:08 pm

"Cleanup on aisle 10 that crazy old fucker pinched off another one."

coolhandnuke October 4, 2012 at 12:21 pm

In a related story, back in High School some wanker thought he'd be clever and laced my bong hit with PCP…that was a nightmarish day. As payback, a few days later I had to drop a deuce so I went out to the school parking lot, found his car–which he poured every last cent into, some bitchin Camaro or Firebird–and I got up on his hood and shat on his windshield. He thought some other dude did it and he retaliated by shitting on his car's windshield which further snowballed into the great Tucson windshield shitstorm of 1981.

Terry October 4, 2012 at 12:24 pm

There is a reason why the military puts young men in the infantry.

coolhandnuke October 4, 2012 at 12:31 pm

And if you have been through Marine Corps boot camp–as I have–you will see firsthand young men shitting all over themselves. The first two weeks is when it really hits the fan.

coolhandnuke October 4, 2012 at 12:33 pm

I forgot to add that the PCP lacer is now a manager at a Walmart.

Lascauxcaveman October 4, 2012 at 1:25 pm

Is this what they call 'poetic justice?'

coolhandnuke October 4, 2012 at 1:52 pm

I believe the Halls of Poetic Justice have been shuttered at Walmart for many a moon…replaced by the bargain book bin of Sarah Palin cookbooks and Nookular Bomb Making for Dummies.

tessiee October 4, 2012 at 2:06 pm

That made me burst out laughing so loudly I actually startled myself.

NorthStarSpanx October 4, 2012 at 11:34 am

But how will our American Motor Home community cope? They don't know how to shop anyplace else for their essentials.

GunToting[Redacted] October 4, 2012 at 1:41 pm

FlyingJ Truck Stop stands ready to meet their needs.

NorthStarSpanx October 4, 2012 at 4:28 pm

What's that saying? When life closes a door, God opens a FlyingJ Truck Stop?

FakaktaSouth October 4, 2012 at 11:34 am

Workers of Wal-Mart ARE the 47 percent (like almost entirely) and I am tired of how many of them are on public assistance while working way more than 40 hours and getting paid for 30. I wouldn't EVER voluntarily walk into a Wal-Mart ESPECIALLY not for them cakes those people like.

FNMA October 4, 2012 at 12:01 pm

My kid worked at Wal Mart when he was in school and as bad as you think working there is, it's much worse. Wal Mart fucks those people in so many ways, they should make videos of it and post them on Redtube. (I've been told it's some sort of intertubes dealie that posts videos of this nature.) A lot of the people my kid worked with were people who had worked at manufacturers and whose jobs were now in China and Indonesia and other third-world shitholes, like South Carolina. A lot of them were single mothers who, by the time they paid for child care and insurance and transportation to get to work, had about $10 left for the week to feed their kids.

Jesus, don't get me started…

Radiotherapy October 4, 2012 at 11:35 am

I guess I'll just have to go to Whole Foods and Nieman-Marcus.

nounverb911 October 4, 2012 at 11:37 am

They are conveniently located across the street from each other in Bellevue, WA.

MissTaken October 4, 2012 at 11:44 am

And in Walnut Creek, CA. Must be some sort of consumerism conspiracy.

emmelemm October 4, 2012 at 7:17 pm

Do you live in Walnut Creek, btw? (Just askin'. I've actually been to Walnut Creek, of all the things.)

Terry October 4, 2012 at 12:25 pm

Kmart and Tarjay.

Blunderthing October 4, 2012 at 11:35 am

The only thing wrong with the poor is that the rich is running out of ways to kill them.

gullywompr October 4, 2012 at 11:35 am

Surely there must be some sort of second amendment solution to end this strike? There's always a second amendment solution…

Designer_Rants October 4, 2012 at 2:40 pm

SURVEYOR'S MARKS LIBEL!!!!1

Will_Panic October 4, 2012 at 11:35 am

The headline for this post deserves a Pulitzer. Or maybe a Polk. Or maybe a Peabody.

Baconzgood October 4, 2012 at 11:37 am

I don't want to sound like a political hipster but…I don't think I've walked into a Walmart in 20 years.

Terry October 4, 2012 at 12:26 pm

When I lived down South, you often had no choice. WalMart has driven out the other businesses, so you shop there or you drive more than an hour.

kyeshinka October 4, 2012 at 11:38 am

Where are the rednecks going to pick up chicks now? The derby?

Jimmyone October 4, 2012 at 12:10 pm

Outside a dentist office who is advertising Free Tooth Pulling special…Pull the last one and get a cake for free.

pinkocommi October 4, 2012 at 11:38 am

The nerve of those WalMart workers! Thinking they have rights to a safe workplace and reasonable hours. Next thing you know they'll be demanding a living wage.

ifthethunderdontgetya October 4, 2012 at 11:39 am

♪ 2 packs a peace cigs
for me and you ♫
~

BaldarTFlagass October 4, 2012 at 11:39 am

I fucking hate Walmart with heat of 10,000 supernovas.

ifthethunderdontgetya October 4, 2012 at 11:41 am

So stop fucking Walmart!

/ your Doktor

LibertyLover October 4, 2012 at 11:42 am

Can't you get a supernova at Walmart?

Terry October 4, 2012 at 12:27 pm

I buy mine at Costco in packs of 6.

LibertyLover October 4, 2012 at 12:41 pm

I know, right? It pays to shop around for those. ;-)

prommie October 4, 2012 at 1:11 pm

Getting a little pattonesque there, buddy.

Mumbletypeg October 4, 2012 at 11:41 am

and lift thousands of boxes weighing up to 250 lbs with no support

Two hundred and fifty pounds.
Even a fraction of that — is it *that* encumbering upon you, WalMart exploitatrixes, to budget for some equipment like hydraulic lifts and such?

DerrickWildcat October 4, 2012 at 11:41 am

I'm about ready to go to Walmart. My pet cats need cat food and I need a case of Steel Reserve and maybe some of those Git 'er Done Potato Chips. I wear Camo Trucker's hats a lot so I fit in pretty good.

DerrickWildcat October 4, 2012 at 12:54 pm

Hey you guys, The Walmart on N. 27th street is open. I didn't see any protestors or anything. They didn't have any of the Larry the Cable Guy, "Git 'er Done" chips, but they did have some Hot Dog flavored Potato Chips. They really taste like Hot Dogs!

tessiee October 4, 2012 at 2:11 pm

I bet those would go real good with these here Potato Chip flavored Hot Dogs I got.

LibertyLover October 4, 2012 at 11:41 am

Mitt Romeny sends his money to the Caymans. The people who shop at Walmart send their money to Bentonville, Arkansas.

proudgrampa October 4, 2012 at 11:43 am

*yawn*

Good morning, fellow Wonketteers. What's happenin'?

ttommyunger October 4, 2012 at 11:44 am

Remember when Sam Walton was such an Icon? Sort of a cross between "Buy American" and "Be a Great Employer"? He must be spinning in his grave. I sometimes think we, as a Country, are heading in the wrong direction…

FakaktaSouth October 4, 2012 at 11:47 am

I really DO remember when MADE IN THE USA signs were all over the regular old Wal-Marts, how much better would life be if all the shit they sold there was still made here now? The very first time I went into one as a rather young and fun person, I was WAY less than sober, which I think is the only way to do that, and the fact that they had "waterbed cleaner" completely tripped me out. We could still totally make that here.

ttommyunger October 4, 2012 at 11:54 am

Jeez. It's been years since I've thought about a waterbed. Not that anyone cares, but I learned early on that I can't fuck in one of them. I can fuck in a VW, on a rock-pile, in public even, but not on a waterbed….Go figure.

FakaktaSouth October 4, 2012 at 11:56 am

Rock piles ARE more comfy than waterbeds, specially them good old 70s rubber ones that need cleaning.

ttommyunger October 4, 2012 at 12:00 pm

Glad to hear it, thought It was just me.

actor212 October 4, 2012 at 12:04 pm

You had to learn how to syncopate.

Of course, white folks got no rivvim…

ttommyunger October 4, 2012 at 12:08 pm

I've been told I'm blacker on the inside than most blacks are on the outside.Sent from the Field, not in Garrison.

tessiee October 4, 2012 at 2:12 pm

Pardon my unladylike phraseology, but:
Who are you trying to bullshit, tommy?
You fuck in the back of your El Camino; everybody knows that.
But you do put an old carpet down first, because you're just classy that way.

ttommyunger October 4, 2012 at 2:16 pm

Nope, never have, but I'm now strangely aroused….

Terry October 4, 2012 at 12:28 pm

But recall that MADE IN THE USA could mean being made in the Marianas Island by Chinese ex-pats working for slave wages. All thanks to Tom DeLay.

actor212 October 4, 2012 at 11:55 am

You mean how like he insisted every product in the store be American made? And that all his stores be within a day's drive of a regional warehouse?

Yea, he probably would cringe…if he wasn't trampled by the Black Friday stampedes

James Michael Curley October 4, 2012 at 11:55 am

Didn't the first heir resign from the BoD because of the onerous labor practices they implemented after the father died?

ttommyunger October 4, 2012 at 11:59 am

Pretty sure I would.

James Michael Curley October 4, 2012 at 12:52 pm

Yea, but you’re an honorable man, not the self indulgent yuppie spawn of some poor schmuck who worked his entire life.

ttommyunger October 4, 2012 at 1:04 pm

Fortunately, you don't know me, but thank you anyway.

tessiee October 4, 2012 at 2:14 pm

My former co-worker who was originally from Arkansas knew Sam Walton slightly and said he seemed like an OK guy who treated his employees decently. I gather he would be appalled by his descendants and the way his company is run nowadays.

ttommyunger October 4, 2012 at 2:17 pm

My point exactly.

GeorgiaBurning October 4, 2012 at 5:44 pm

If there is an afterlife, Sam Walton and George Romney have similar regrets

ttommyunger October 4, 2012 at 6:04 pm

No shit!Sent from the Field, not in Garrison.

Mumbletypeg October 4, 2012 at 11:44 am

"Now I'm stocking shirts in the Wal-Mart store
Just like the ones we made before
Cept this one came from Singapore
I guess we can't make it here anymore"

James McMurtry. Or Barbra Ehrenreich, take your pick.

prommie October 4, 2012 at 2:11 pm

Me been thinking McMurtry's song should be the new national anthem. My own personal fave now is Black Spartacus Heart Attack Machine: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nTk-2jaNnIE

The_Peckerwood October 4, 2012 at 11:46 am

Neal Boortz is going to get his panties in a wad over this…

actor212 October 4, 2012 at 12:05 pm

He can buy new ones at Wal-Mart.

WAIT! NO HE CAN'T!

Peckerwood_Pete October 4, 2012 at 12:11 pm

That human penis with a microphone comes on the AM station here in my town in SC. I've tuned in before, and IMO, his show is nothing but a 3 hour daily rant against unions and people on food stamps.

actor212 October 4, 2012 at 12:30 pm

I've been, on and off, thinking about the phenomenon of right wing talk radio. The best i can figure out, it's the working day equivalent to the Kardashians or any reality TV show.

Think about it, you get to feel smug and superior to imaginary people because someone made up shit and told you.

actor212 October 4, 2012 at 11:46 am

In there green movement, WalMart has opened McD's in their stores.

ttommyunger October 4, 2012 at 11:51 am

Right next to the Pharmacy, I'm sure.

Terry October 4, 2012 at 12:23 pm

Next to large displays of diabeetus medicine and miracle fat melting pills.

ttommyunger October 4, 2012 at 12:28 pm

And the Hoveround Shopping Carts.Sent from the Field, not in Garrison.

BigSkullF*ckingDog October 4, 2012 at 11:47 am

Obviously these workers have been skipping their morning pep rally/propaganda session.

tessiee October 4, 2012 at 2:16 pm

Can you blame them?
If you get caught just mouthing the words to the company song, instead of singing it, you get a whuppin'.

actor212 October 4, 2012 at 11:48 am

(Yes, you have a local Walmart even though you don’t have a local newspaper.)

Not I, said the precious snowflake Noo Yawkah

BigSkullF*ckingDog October 4, 2012 at 11:49 am

My brother used to work for Walmart. He always insisted they were a great company and nobody treated their employees better. On the other hand, my brother is a GIANT IDIOT.

weejee October 4, 2012 at 11:50 am

Yes, you have a local Walmart even though you don’t have a local newspaper

In Seattle we has none Walmarts. We must sneak over the troll toll bridge to Bellevue for our stops at Walmart after our double shot of Whole Foods and Nieman-Marcus as nounverb911 noted above.

BigSkullF*ckingDog October 4, 2012 at 11:55 am

Gross, cheap shopping is the only reason Lynnwood exists.

eggsacklywright October 4, 2012 at 12:06 pm

I think there's one up near Martha Lake somewheres.

Mumbletypeg October 4, 2012 at 12:22 pm

Oh! that image you linked just made my day. I am so stealing that.

emmelemm October 4, 2012 at 7:19 pm

Is there a Walmart in Bellevue? Really?

Also, fuck Walmart.

4TheTurnstiles October 4, 2012 at 11:53 am

This is what WalMart is for: it's America's place to get hit in the head with a claw hammer by a methed-out stranger
http://www.kptv.com/story/14991697/milwaukie-man-

SaintNixon October 4, 2012 at 11:55 am

cedar? cheese? cakes? whhaaa?
what? what? WHAT???

Is this a JEW thing?

I'm guessing this is a Jew thing because I don't get those goofs. This headline writer could benefit from a zinger-coach.

MosesInvests October 4, 2012 at 12:04 pm

Geh in drerd, goyishe kop.

PubOption October 4, 2012 at 12:09 pm

Click on the red phrase referring to cedar cheese and cakes in the article, and all will be revealed. Alternatively try this http://wonkette.com/480881/gop-barack-obamas-comm

SaintNixon October 4, 2012 at 12:36 pm

That's too much work.

(side note: that glancing factoid about local newspapers killed me. please do everything to keep print alive. please please please do any/every thing to keep print around. get your local newspaper EVERY DAY. commie bonus: most of those d00ds are unionized! win!

fuflans October 4, 2012 at 1:33 pm

it's worth the work. seriously.

starfanglednut October 4, 2012 at 8:16 pm

It's a classic Wonkette post. one of the all time greats. Click! You won't regret it.

tessiee October 4, 2012 at 2:18 pm

Feh.

SayItWithWookies October 4, 2012 at 11:57 am

I knew this was getting closer to happening when WalMart opened its first store in China a little while ago. The employees must've been thinking "Wait — where the hell are they gonna get their cheap shit made?" And then the realization set in.

James Michael Curley October 4, 2012 at 11:59 am

The first Walmart I ever went to had pictures of the cashiers on the wall with big numbers and the wife asked what the numbers were. I said jokingly they were the days remaining before their green card expired. Less than a year later it was one of the NJ Walmart that was busted by ICE. Walmart, of course, alleged they knew nothing and the illegals with phony papers were hired by 'the contractor we retained' etc., etc.

Chow Yun Flat October 4, 2012 at 12:02 pm

Walmart supported some form of the ACA since the health insurance they offer their employees is almost impossible for the worker to qualify for and is worth less than what they pay for it.

There have been stories about how part time workers at Walmart in Michigan qualify for Medicaid assistance–which means they have little income and no assets.

Lovely people who run Walmart.

SpeedoFart October 4, 2012 at 12:54 pm

Not just Michigan– here in NY, it's not unusual to see WalMart employees in what few free health clinics that we have. Not to mention the WalMart employees who qualify for SNAP benefits.

I just don't understand the huge corporations that didn't speak out in favor of some kind of healthcare reform (I only recall the CEO of Ford saying that single payer would be swell)– I mean, it's less cost to them and they get higher productivity out of the deal. What's not to love?

CrunchyKnee October 4, 2012 at 12:04 pm

Trailer for sale or rent
Cardboard boxes to let fifty cents
No phone no pool ate the pets
I ain't got no cigarettes
Ah but, 3000 hours of pushing broom
Buys an eight by twelve four bit room
I'm a man of means by no means
King of the road

tessiee October 4, 2012 at 2:00 pm

Countin' flowers on the wall
that don't bother me at all;
playin' solitaire alone
with a deck of fifty-one…

prommie October 4, 2012 at 12:07 pm

Man now is when I just sob softly knowing that my fondest dream, of a general strike, will never ever ever fucking happen in this fucked country. Fucking lumpenproles ruin every fucking thing.

FakaktaSouth October 4, 2012 at 12:11 pm

From the googles I see that lumpenproles also encompass the brothel owners. One with such as your avatar should like those people.

prommie October 4, 2012 at 12:17 pm

You see it perfectly describes those there deluded rednecks who think they share the same interests as the Romneys. I am really more a Trotskyite than a Marxist Lenninist, for sure.

James Michael Curley October 4, 2012 at 12:33 pm

Don't retire to Mexico.

prommie October 4, 2012 at 1:15 pm

Yeah, that would be dangerous, I am gonna go to where Che Guevara went, instead.

tessiee October 4, 2012 at 2:20 pm

Keep a sharp eye out for icepicks*

*ya see what I did there? Huh? Huh?

elviouslyqueer October 4, 2012 at 12:10 pm

From the Star Tribune linky: when nearly 14 million Americans are unemployed, complaining about work hours is grossly self-indulgent

*ahem*

No, it is FUCKING NOT "grossly self-indulgent" to expect employers to accord workers a smidgen of respect and some small expectation that they won't be treated like they're errant, ungrateful children. It's precisely this type of contemptuous, dismissive attitude (from a newspaper editor, no less!) that makes me want to get out my axe and go all Faye Dunaway in "Mommie Dearest" on these assholes' rosebushes.*

*metaphorically, of course. Or "with votes," also.

actor212 October 4, 2012 at 12:14 pm

"Yes dear, MORE wire hangers"

FakaktaSouth October 4, 2012 at 12:18 pm

THIS has been the same shit they were talking with the teachers' strike. It makes me CRAZY. When did "hey, you wanna a job at all, be happy with the shitty one you got, don't be trying to actually LIVE off them wages and such, it's for the job creators to provide and you to suck it" become the way we do things? Just gimme the axe handle when you get tired. I'll finish up here.

James Michael Curley October 4, 2012 at 12:37 pm

There can be no economic growth in a country which stifles the initiative of its working class. The decline of real wages over the last thirty years, even without inflation adjustments, is as much a cause of the economic collapse of 2008 and the paltry recession as any other reason.

bibliotequetress October 4, 2012 at 1:02 pm

Truth. Thank you.

tessiee October 4, 2012 at 2:24 pm

Or hey, here's a crazy idea… since they're making people work all those hours, they obviously have more work than they have people to do it… hows about they *hire more people* and actually BE jerb creators, instead of just keep saying it?

Naaaah, that's just crazy talk, right?

prommie October 4, 2012 at 12:14 pm

And by the way, y'all, never ever ever ever cross a fucking picket line motherfuckers! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yX46rPmXO4U

proudgrampa October 4, 2012 at 12:15 pm

Question. Do they sell liquor in Wal-Mart, outside of Utah (Utah only has State-run liquor stores)>

Because if they did, I would totally go to Wal-Mart for my Bombay Sapphire.

iTuna October 4, 2012 at 12:20 pm

Depends on the state. I think, for example, California and Florida both allow hard liquor to be sold in grocery stores. Here in Texas, however, you can't.

actor212 October 4, 2012 at 12:46 pm

The only WalMart I've ever been to, in Oneonta NY, did not, but they did sell beer and NY state wines, like any other supermarket could.

However, they carved out a little niche outside the doors and put in an "independent" liquor store

shelwood46 October 4, 2012 at 1:12 pm

Yup, in NJ alcohol of any type can only be sold in separate licensed liquor stores (or bars with carry licenses). PA is similar with their State Stores. Makes me fondly remember buying beer by the can in convenience stores in WI.

iTuna October 4, 2012 at 1:34 pm

I regularly walk to the gas station 6 blocks away and buy 3 24-ounce PBRs- one for the walk home, one to drink while having a cigarette on the porch, and one to finish the job. For all its faults, Texas is pretty cool sometimes.

BaldarTFlagass October 4, 2012 at 12:22 pm

I know they sell liquor at the Walmart in Shawano, Wisconsin. I hated going there, but had no choice. Walmart, that is, not Shawano.

CindynEncinitas October 4, 2012 at 12:16 pm

I would like to care about this but all of my attention has been arrested by the glorious police force of Pago Pago. Many hearts to the right-thinking jailers who let their "guests" go on beer runs for them. God bless America and its protectorates! I'm packing as I write this.

actor212 October 4, 2012 at 12:26 pm

Enjoy Pango Pango (they ran out of Ns when putting signs up, true story.)

CindynEncinitas October 4, 2012 at 12:36 pm

Crap. All these years I wanted to go to Pago Pago and it's not really called that. I suppose Tripoli isn't really Tripoli, either.

tessiee October 4, 2012 at 2:27 pm

I'm just about ready to go with you, even knowing absolutely nothing about Pago Pago, because how cool would it be to say you lived there?

owhatever October 4, 2012 at 12:27 pm

Arrest these ingrate commies and hire real American workers because Freedom. The Chinese condoms from Wal-Mart are a little small, but they last forever but I won't stop buying a new pack every six months.

Mumbletypeg October 4, 2012 at 12:29 pm

Adding to my earlier mention of the heavy lifting labor — From the summary of Ehrenreich's published book on the tedium of living low-wage:

"Foremost, [Ehrenreich] attacks the notion that low-wage jobs require "unskilled" labor. The author, a journalist with a Ph.D. in cell biology, found manual labor taxing, uninteresting and degrading. She says that the work required incredible feats of stamina, focus, memory, quick thinking, and fast learning. Constant and repeated movement creates a risk of repetitive stress injury; pain must often be worked through to hold a job in a market with constant turnover; and the days are filled with degrading and uninteresting tasks (e.g. toilet-cleaning and mopping). She also details several individuals in management roles who served mainly to interfere with worker productivity, to force employees to undertake pointless tasks, and to make the entire low-wage work experience even more miserable."

SayItWithWookies October 4, 2012 at 12:38 pm

Sure, but since the average middle-class American makes a quarter of a million dollars a year according to Mitt Romney, if they saved just a little of their money they'd be able to start their own business — labor is just a step on the ladder to economic freedom enjoyed by the vast majority in this country.

Then again, maybe I'm just getting delirious from not having had a raise in four years.

Mumbletypeg October 4, 2012 at 12:48 pm

on the ladder

I kept hearing Obama use that word last night, as I tuned in/ out of the show.

Freedom to thrive if you're born in the right circumstances. Then the ladder is built-in, not an ''added bonus.''
Freedom to fail is a 'privilege' of the vast majority, one that's easily rejoindered by the 1% when pressed with "Why too big to 'fail'?" Their ladder is anchored in concrete. For us remaining percenters, it's where the concrete sidewalk ends.

ETA: so now who's delirious? (read: sleep-deprived)

prommie October 4, 2012 at 1:04 pm

Nickled and Dimed was as fucking relentlessly depressing as Cormac McCarthy. Or even Angela's Ashes.

Mumbletypeg October 4, 2012 at 1:17 pm

as fucking relentlessly depressing

When DokZoom referenced it a number of posts ago, I went and dug up my copy. Opened at random but was mainly interested in her account of the housecleaning-team gig, Merry Maids or such.
That episode had been preceded, I had forgotten, by a stint at a retirement home, serving and cleaning up after the meals to the senior citizens. Some welcome comic relief in those intervening pages! I will admit I was surprised and it's not to contradict you — the bulk of her message is sobering, yet I was revisiting it again and found I kept turning the pages. Her prose makes it go down easier; along with a dose of, "Yeah she's confirming what I've suspected all along"~

CindynEncinitas October 4, 2012 at 2:33 pm

When my husband left me (unemployed, destitute, carless) there was a retirement home within walking distance, so I got a job there. My most vivid memory for the month I lasted was cleaning shit off the carpet next to the bed of a demented former airline pilot. And when I got my paycheck for 42 hours, I almost had a nervous breakdown. So I went back to the legal field where I clean shit up for substantially more.

prommie October 4, 2012 at 3:56 pm

The thought of going back to the legal field is relentlessly depressing to me. My new motto, therefore, in an effort to be cheerful, shall be "It beats cleaning up demented pilot shit."

tessiee October 4, 2012 at 2:30 pm

Conversation between myself and a former co-worker as we passed in the hallway:
Bob: Never a dull moment, eh?
Me: Plenty of dull moments, Bob; never a FREE moment.

PS. A month or two later, Bob requested vacation time that he had accumulated, and was approved. When he returned from vacation, he was informed that he no longer had a job at Screw Boss.

tessiee October 4, 2012 at 2:31 pm

"several individuals in management roles who served mainly to interfere with worker productivity, to force employees to undertake pointless tasks, and to make the entire low-wage work experience even more miserable."

It's as I suspected; they HATE us. They're not just content to squeeze every nickel out of us; their day isn't complete until they've ground a heel into some poor schlub's windpipe.
Having it confirmed strangely does not make me feel better.

Mumbletypeg October 4, 2012 at 2:44 pm

Yeah… the bit you highlighted there. How does one derive satisfaction from contriving piddly busywork-tasks for others, unless one has really gotten not only desensitized but dehumanized, in service to a more machinistic-like mentality that acts to guarantee preservation in status quo, by and *only* by means of quashing others — since that is, after all, how a vertical structure of success works? Triumph of the few at the expense of (the broken backs of ) the many.

AtwatersGhost October 4, 2012 at 12:33 pm

KitchenAid hates Grandmas, glad they're all dead.

DahBoner October 4, 2012 at 1:06 pm

Cuz Dead Gmammy's don't buy Kitchen hoo-haws.

decentcitizen October 4, 2012 at 12:37 pm

True story: I once represented a client who had fleeced two brothers out of a lot of money in a scam. These brothers amassed over a million dollars in profit sharing from working for Walmart from when it was just starting out over the course of 25 years. That was when Walmart had profit sharing. And wasn't the corporate piece of shit it's become. I hope these workers get some concessions such as Walmart agreeing to obey the law.

Guppy October 4, 2012 at 12:42 pm

a tougher response would be a PR disaster

When have they ever cared about PR, or had reason to?

I expect them to send in Blackwater Xe Academi by the end of the end of the month.

James Michael Curley October 4, 2012 at 12:44 pm

Pinkertons is still in business. Always go with a tried and trusted strike breaker.

prommie October 4, 2012 at 1:05 pm

Old school!

Guppy October 4, 2012 at 1:35 pm

Even better idea: cut costs by hiring undocumented Mexicans to do it. Undocumented Mexican women at that.

Again, Walmart's motto is "Fuck the PR."

tessiee October 4, 2012 at 2:42 pm

Only because Pinkerton wanted too much money to bust heads.

johnnyzhivago October 4, 2012 at 12:45 pm

Walmart's closed??? How the hell can I pick up a box of wheaties, a prepackaged salad, a can of insecticide and some 9mm ammunition without going into 4 different stores???????????

tessiee October 4, 2012 at 2:42 pm

"I'm not sure what you're planning for the weekend, but count me out." — Marge Simpson

bibliotequetress October 4, 2012 at 1:00 pm

No snark.
Just good for them. Walmart has had such a shit labor record for so many years now I don't really remember them ever being a good employer– although I do remember when they used to have mandatory prayers. I thnk they did stop that. Unfortunate that the defacto slave labor in Burma and China and wherever else cranking out the barely-worthy-of-the-name Levi's and other garbage Walmart sells can't strike too.

DahBoner October 4, 2012 at 1:03 pm

Nothing says 'prestige' more than whipping out your Walmart MoneyCard to pay for art, champagne or hookers…

tessiee October 4, 2012 at 2:43 pm

So says Donald Trump.

Geminisunmars October 4, 2012 at 1:03 pm

It is hard to show solidarity with the workers of an establishment that I already boycott.

Ruhe October 4, 2012 at 1:06 pm

I have occasion to go into the local Wal-Mart once in a while and it's always depressing…and crowded. The marketing/merchandising genius of the current Wal-Mart corp. is that they are giving a very large portion of the population exactly what they want. Sad.

ThundercatHo October 4, 2012 at 1:07 pm

I really hope that hell for the entitled assholes such at Mittens, et al, is a permanent position at Walmart and living in a trailer park in tornado alley. A bunch of screaming, snot-nosed brats should frost that cake quite nicely.

manarchist October 4, 2012 at 1:30 pm

Walmart! Not Newspapers!

fuflans October 4, 2012 at 1:41 pm

my fav on the cedar cheese list:

popcikles + honey cooked ham turkey

makin that tonight and mr. fuflans can either eat it or just go hungry

tessiee October 4, 2012 at 1:57 pm

"Today, for the first time in Walmart’s fifty-year history, workers at multiple stores are out on strike… "

So, America hasn't been completely crushed after all?
*perks up*

tessiee October 4, 2012 at 1:59 pm

"Walmart is entirely union-free in North America, and has worked aggressively to stay that way…"

That's putting it very mildly, indeed.

The same can be said of McDonald's, by the way, which is one of many reasons I haven't spent a penny in either place in decades, and wouldn't even if I *had* a penny.

CivicHoliday October 4, 2012 at 2:00 pm

Mitt is now proposing a new tax cut for these fantastic job creators! So that they can hire more slave labor!

Biff October 4, 2012 at 2:17 pm

I live on the outskirts of one of those towns that got a walmart, and not long after, the expected happened–bye bye, competition. We managed to hang onto our hardware store because they sold lumber, and had a truss factory. Now it's gone too, because Home Depot. Since it's at least 65 miles to the next town, I find myself occasionally having to shop there. A few months ago, I noticed they got rid of all the greeters. Must've gotten all uppity, or something. Anyway, it would be nice to see it go, but it's now the biggest employer in that godforsakentownthattimeforgot so it would cause real pain.

A story: I was at an automobile race at Laguna Seca recently. One of the competitors was Rob Walton, driving a virtually irreplaceable Shelby Daytona coupe. Somewhere out of my view, he crashed it into another competitor's also extremely valuable Shelby Cobra roadster. To Walton, no big deal–he made more money than the car cost him in the time the race took to complete. The other guy? Maybe that was his entire nestegg. Both were reparable, luckily, but they're only original once…

Pragmatist2 October 4, 2012 at 12:20 pm

Then everyone will think they are "entitled" to litterboxes.

CindynEncinitas October 4, 2012 at 4:05 pm

You fucking rock, Prommie! I'm picturing that in a nice cross-stitch, framed, maybe with a nosegay of daisies… That will be hanging on the wall of my room at the old folks home.

James Michael Curley October 5, 2012 at 5:26 am

Hmm! I’ve got a partially read copy of The Motorcycle Diaries right over there on the desk. Don’t tell me how it ends.

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