Mmmm, still not so much, check back in a couple of yearsIf there’s one thing Mitt Romney has done right in this campaign, it’s make people like him! His national tour, in which he’s exposed millions of Americans to his easygoing demeanor and warm personality, has won him lots of friends on the campaign trail. The numbers prove it! A recent Bloomberg survey revealed that a full 43 percent of Americans have a positive view of Mitt Romney, against only 50 percent who don’t. This puts Romney only 3 percentage points away from America’s most beloved president, George W. Bush!

Yes, a full 46 percent of Americans apparently have fond memories of George W. Bush, though it’s likely that most of these people are political comedy writers who miss the endless stream of easy jokes. But is there evidence that some of the data from this poll might be just complete gibbering nonsense — not because of any error in methodology, but just because the people polled (i.e., ordinary Americans) are kind of dumb? Here, chew on these numbers:

Obama heads into the closing stretch of the race with a majority of Americans — 53 percent — disapproving of his handling of the economy, and Romney holding a slim edge as the candidate likely voters rate best able to create jobs. The president does have one clear advantage — his economic plan is breaking through with more Americans, who give him a 48 percent to 39 percent advantage over Romney on having a vision for a successful future.

“I think Mitt Romney would be better at creating jobs. Also, I think Obama has a better economic plan for a successful future. I just like saying things on the phone. I’m so lonely! Please don’t hang up.”

An additional sign of the poll’s flaws: it claims only 42 percent of Americans have a positive view of Joe Biden, when he’s already hugged twice that many. Also, Bill Clinton’s approval rating is listed as 64 percent, when it should probably be at about 130 percent. [Bloomberg/Raw poll data]

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  • Nobody will miss Mitt after the election.

    • Esteev

      I have a game later and my mitt is missing.

    • sbj1964

      Mitt needs to get the new 5.0 upgrade to his personality program.My toaster has a more exciting appeal than Mittens.

  • UnholyMoses

    Billboard: "Miss me yet?"

    A vast majority of America: "Hell fucking no."

    The GOP: "Who the hell are you?"

    • Jennyjen798


      "Hell Fucking NO!" is the exact phrase I say every time I pass that piece of shit billboard.

  • Barbara_

    W. is going to the Cayman Islands right before the election for an investment conference.
    Topics include things like "How To Create New Opportunity Sets In Asia And Latam".

    Thanks for reminding everyone of one of the places Mitt stashes his money.

    • Boojum

      Romney will Skype it.

  • I'll love you better, George, in a prison jumpsuit. When's the prosecution for war crimes getting started?

    • eggsacklywright

      Right after Kissinger's prolly.

  • Generation[redacted]

    58% of voters surveyed don't like the way their sister sits on Biden's lap.

    • Callyson

      58% of sisters like sitting on Biden's lap

      /also, too

    • Geminisunmars

      It's real hard to keep your balance in that lap.

      • bikerlaureate


        I'm glad he's on our side. Unleashing the Biden is a more intimidating prospect than previously reported.

  • nounverb911

    I'll like Bush after he's tried for war crimes. (Nope, I lied).

  • Radiotherapy

    Mission Accomplished.

    • NorthStarSpanx

      You know Bush is still an influence when Ryan is channeling him:

      "Teach a man to fish, and you feed him for a lifetime. Don't feed fish."

      • bonghitforjesus

        More like "Teach a man to build a fire, he's warm for the night, set him on fire and he's warm for the rest of his life!"

  • new_pic_for_NEWTer

    Words, numbers; hell they can mean anything!

  • Callyson

    I wish they had compared Mittens' approval rating with that of the NFL replacement referees. I'll bet the refs come out on top, even in Green Bay…

  • The problem is that the pollster's didn't ask where Mittens would create jobs.

    Judging by his awesome record at Not scummy* Bain, the answer is anywhere but US Amercia.

    *it is.

  • Lascauxcaveman

    Hmmm. 39% of Americans prefer Romney's economic plan? Either they can see into the future, or consider a blandly handsome rich white guy uttering vague platitudes about "jobs" and "workers" and "taxes" to be an economic plan.

    • IceCreamEmpress

      Wait, just saying "jobs" and "lower taxes" doesn't magically make those things appear from the sky?


      • chicken_thief

        It's it only lower tax rates. His plan is revenue neutral, so the loss in rates will be made up in fewer deductions.

        Not to be an elitist stickler for detail or anything….

        • Lot_49

          Lower tax rates for the rich, fewer deductions (health insurance, mortgage interest) for the middle class.

          • Esteev

            The American Dream. Soak it in.

    • tessiee

      "consider a rich white guy to be an economic plan."


  • coolhandnuke

    Fifty-three percent of those who answer these poll questions do not know the difference or how to spell poll, pole and pull.

    • Geminisunmars

      or pol.

    • Boojum

      Or stoopid.

  • Yes, George, I did – but I'm not out of bullets votes yet.

  • CalvinsChoice

    Do people have the same high regard for Paul Ryan as they do for the universally beloved Dick Cheney?

    • zumpie

      They will after he shoots his buddy in the face while hunting.

    • Generation[redacted]

      Unfortunately, they had to throw out the polling on Cheney, because when they asked about "He who shall not be named" everyone assumed they were talking about Voldemort and that artificially inflated his approval rating.

      • zumpie

        Oh, so THAT'S why Rick Scott hasn't been recalled/impeached/imprisoned yet!

  • elviouslyqueer

    Approximately 125,000,000% of Americans surveyed would also pay good money to see Samuel L. Jackson tell Rmoney/Ryan to Shut the Fuck Up.

    • Generation[redacted]

      "What does your economic plan look like?"
      "What ain't no economic plan I ever heard of. Do they have a flat tax in What?"

      • just_a_head

        Does America LOOK like a BITCH?!

        • UnholyMoses

          "Alternative Minimum Tax, motherfucker—DO YOU PAY IT?!?"

  • All this talking about Mitt's bolo poll numbers has given me a Jerry Falwell flashback moment.

    / wipes nostalgic tear from corner of eye

  • SorosBot

    Bush is more likeable now that he's no longer actively killing thousands of people.

    • Nah — still think of him as a vile, loathesome, uncaring witless fucking bastard.

      • SorosBot

        Oh same here; but a lot of Americans are dumb and have short memories.

      • sewollef

        still think of him as a vile, loathesome, uncaring witless fucking bastard er, and war criminal, right? Mustn't forget that.

        I'd fly to The Netherlands for that event.

    • docterry6973

      Yeah, Obama took over that franchise. I'm voting for Barry, but I haven't forgotten about the bodies.

  • MonkeyHamlet

    Faux News: This poll is skewed toward people with feelings and thoughts and probably the blahs and the poors!

  • Goonemeritus

    I suspect we will soften our opinion of Mitt when he is doing Viagra ads like Bob Dole.

    • Radiotherapy

      Or "harden" our opinion.

    • Goone, Egg is on line two. Sayz she has a bone to pick with you.

      • UnholyMoses

        So she'll pick it, but not suck it?

    • SorosBot

      Or cameos on Parks and Recreation like Walnuts.

    • tessiee

      Eww ick.

  • Oblios_Cap

    As long as Ann & Rafalca love him, Willard is a happy man. The kids aren't as important.

    • Typodong3

      To republicans, kids are only important BEFORE they are born.

    • Terry

      If Ann and the kids don't love Mitt, they won't get into heaven.

      • cousinitt

        Wait, all horses go to heaven, right? Or planets. Or glue factories…

  • Haha, the Bloomberg article is titled "Unfavorable Views of Romney Cloud His Message on Economy" — when really it should be "Nobody Likes Romney's Stupid Plan of Letting Rich Greedy Assholes Who Fucked Up Economy Five Years Ago Do It Again."

    • herecomedajudge

      or possibly " stupid electorate has finally come to realize that 30 years of trickle down econ policy has royally fucked the once stable middle class"

      • Boojum

        Or, let's be honest, 50 years of "nigger, nigger, welfare nigger" is now only appealing to a set not large enough to win elections. Because "trickle down" only worked when it was backed up by a healthy dose of Willie Horton and welfare Cadillacs.

    • Lot_49

      Are not said "Rich Greedy Assholes" the target demographic of the Bloomberg empire? They can't handle the truth.

      Plus, it's our fault (we non-greedy, non-rich, possibly-but-not-necessarily-assholes) whose unfavorable views are "clouding" his message. It's our fault! If we'd quit "clouding" his message, everyone would recognize it, love Mitt, and vote for him!

      Too bad….Here come the clouds again!

    • It's fair and balanced.

  • Typodong3

    He still has 40 days to catch up.

    • Esteev

      Didn't ya know, 2012 was a dry run for 2016. As in, "who would vote for anyone completely sober?"

  • ph7

    I'd throw both shoes at Romney.

    • cousinitt


      Too harsh?

      • tessiee

        Although it does have the advantage of throwing something where "almost" counts.

    • PubOption

      One for each face.

    • CthuNHu

      With my feet still in them!

      Of votes! My feet of votes!

  • eggsacklywright

    Fucking war criminals drain my snark tank.

    • Jus_Wonderin

      It does frustrate me how President Obama won't bring the snark price per gallon down. Argh.

  • gullywompr

    Hey, Mitt didn't come here to be liked!

    • He's definitely in the right place, then.

    • zumpie

      Yeah, he gets to be Prez cause it's his turn!

    • eggsacklywright

      When Eric von Zipper likes you, you STAY liked.

      • gullywompr

        Him, I like.

  • Terry

    "Yes, a full 46 percent of Americans apparently have fond memories of George W. Bush,"

    I suspect that many of these people are grateful that George just went away.

    • kittensdontlie

      Absence makes the heart grow fonder…

  • zumpie

    Stop it. Stop it. This is hard. You people better wake up and realize all that Mittens will do for you and get in the ring because this is hard. And no more tax returns! But I love you wimmmmminnnnnn!!!!

  • chascates

    Miss him yet? I haven't been able to get him in my sights so far.

    • AbandonHope_

      Argh, I knew somebody would beat me to that joke.

    • Boojum

      Surveyor's marks, you mean!

  • PsycWench

    A lot of people liked Clinton better after he admitted getting a few blow jobs, but I guess this strategy won't work for Mitt.

    • KeepFnThatChicken

      It will get him excommunicated.

    • Boojum


  • ph7

    Ladies, add Cheney for the worst game of M, F, K evar!

    • BigSkullF*ckingDog

      That would be a fun game of K, K, K. That's a thing, right?

      • bobbert

        I'd think you'd be up for SF, SF, SF.

    • tessiee

      I don't think Cheney *can* be killed.

      • Mittaplasia

        He can be killed but the devil delayed it because he's still busy constructing that particular circle of hell.

  • coolhandnuke

    You know who else has great Pole numbers? I'll answer that. This curvaceous beauty from Warsaw who is a barista at a coffee shop down the street from me.
    I'd estimate her numbers at 38-24-36.

    • KeepFnThatChicken

      You vant vipped kreem?

      • YasserArraFeck

        Thanks – got it covered

    • Dean Martin called from 1967, demanding you stop using his material.

      • coolhandnuke

        True Story. At the Dean Martin Tucson Open golf tournament in 1976, Deano spilled his cocktail on my head. He was fucking tanked. I was fucking twelve.

        • Boojum

          Who were the twelve?

  • Nostrildamus

    There's a guy in my (fairly liberal) neighborhood with one of those "Miss me yet?" bumper stickers. When I walk by I usually crack up and any chuckle to myself "nooooo …". I think he must get that reaction a lot, because he's now added a hand-scrawled note next to it saying "Yes!". It's amusingly desperate.

    • gullywompr

      I'm sure his mom scrawled that on there to cheer him up.

    • Jus_Wonderin

      Speaking of bumper stickers, I saw a Bush/Cheney '04 on a big truck the other day. I thought "Oh really, really? So you are one of the fucks that gave that fucktard 4 more years?"

      And then I said "Oh fuck", again.

      • zumpie

        On the plus side, there's always the times you see, "McCain/Palin '08" stickers and snicker inwardly at thier sad disappointment/blistering white rage.

      • tessiee

        For years, my definition of "slow learner" was somebody who had a Bush *04* bumper sticker.

    • ChickTract_Fil_A

      I have a sad. He probably is the only one around his birthday cake singing 'Happy Birthday to Meeee".

    • Lascauxcaveman

      There's a guy in my town who has a window sticker on his F-350. It has a picture of a grinning Obama and the caption: "Does this ASS make my truck look big?"

      I passed by him in the Safeway parking lot and said "No, but your bumper sticker makes your brain look small."

      • LIT_Fag

        And your giant truck lets us know your dick is small

      • Boojum

        Just tell him that, yes, his ass makes his truck look small. He'll have to buy a bigger truck.

  • gullywompr

    That's not what Romney's internal polling numbers say…

  • Not_So_Much

    But I thought polls were now all wrong all the time when they don't favor Mitt?

    (Also, math is stupid. Too.)

  • old_blu

    Romney is making Bush look good.

  • KeepFnThatChicken

    I have a very fond memory of Dubya: January 20th, 2009.

    • Generation[redacted]

      With Old Man Potter sitting next to him, scowling because he'd never get his hands on the Building and Loan.

    • SorosBot

      Also the time he "choked on a pretzel" (really passed out drunk).

  • ProgressiveInga

    Mitt RMoney reminds me of my ex-husband. The more I know him, the less I like him.

    And I gave up men in the biblical sense after that relationship, too. Therefore, I'm writing in Michelle O on election day.

    • KeepFnThatChicken

      Gotta be a euphemism you're writing in there. Gotta be.

    • ProgressiveInga

      Yes! "writing in Michelle O" = that thing that mormons say they do not do.

  • BarackMyWorld

    This morning's news that Mormons don't give head sure traveled fast.

    • NellCote71

      It just explains so much.

  • mavenmaven

    A billboard should be placed right next to it with a picture of Pat Tillman, who is representative of those we do miss because of that monkey-grinning @$$-wipe.

  • If a pollster asked me to do rank-ordering, I would place Mitt above kidney stones and Louie Gohmert, and below searing gas pains.

  • Sassomatic

    Jobs, maybe, but blowjobs, not so much.

    • KeepFnThatChicken

      Hey, this economy ain't gonna suck itself.

  • Baconzgood

    Poll trutherism and what not.

  • ChickTract_Fil_A

    Ohhhh I get that billboard now. Hahaha. I thought it was meant for throwing shoes at. I must've looked ridiculous on the side of the road.

    • KeepFnThatChicken

      I would have joined you. I would have stayed late with you.

    • Geminisunmars

      That brought up an image of a pile of shoes growing underneath the billboard. Would make a nice cartoon.

      • tessiee

        Or that same billboard, but riddled with bullet holes…
        of votes, or something.

  • freakishlywrong

    "What good is money if it can't inspire terror in your fellow man?"

  • BaldarTFlagass

    I really didn't think I'd ever say this, but if Mitt does somehow win this election, then my answer to the billboard's question will probably be in the affirmative.

  • TavariousChinaSmith

    Romney might have a chance to win if he'd just shut up for the next month. After all, loose lips sink Mitt.

  • noodlesalad

    Bush comeback tour in October! Freebird! Waterboard! Four more wars!

  • CivicHoliday

    Mitt really ought to upgrade his software to iOS6 – the emotion protocols are nearly human now

    • Generation[redacted]

      Do you really want a President commanding the army with a faulty map? He might invade the wrong country or something.

      • noodlesalad

        This might explain why he was campaigning in Toledo, Spain yesterday.

      • CivicHoliday

        As FOX news has already proved, as long as there are brown(isn) people there, it really doesn't matter what country we actually invade

  • Esteev

    I miss George's golf swing. He really put a lick on that ball.

    • SorosBot

      Now watch this drive! And yet the wingnuts like to claim Obama plays too much golf. And i certainly won't suggest it's because it's considered a white man's sport, no way.

      • Esteev

        It would be irresponsible, etc. But, in Obama's defense, he does shoot hoops. And according to Mike Lewis' Vanity Fair piece, he doesn't do that very well, either.

  • sewollef

    D'you think W has found that pesky bin Laden character yet? He was looking high and low some time back I remember.

    • tessiee


      I thought Paul Ryan killed Bin Laden with one punch, right after he ran the two-minute mile.

    • Pat_Pending

      Rather than smoking him out of his cave, I believe W went into his cave and smoked.

  • Abernathy

    Mitt's approval ratings took a dip into the uncanny valley, never to return.

  • Jus_Wonderin

    Serious question here. Bush kept both war costs off the books, right? I know I could find this somewhere but how much debt did he run up with the wars until 2008? I know Obama put the costs on the books.

    So, all this whining about the Obama debt is…bullshit, right?

    • Esteev

      Correct. And it would be remiss to forget the tax cuts and the Medicare Part D drug plan. All of which were not paid for. Obama's biggest addition to the debt was the stimulus; which was too small.

      But, just like the GOP, liberals and statists aren't allowed to bring up W.

      EDIT: I didin't answer the question. If I'm reading this cart correctly, from 2001-08, the war's "estimated" cost was $761B.

    • in many many ways it's bullshit. here are two articles.

      i remember the second (atlantic) got a LOT of play when it appeared. (i am sorry i am always forgetten how to cleverly disguise my links under).


  • SorosBot

    But according to the "unskewed" polls, everybody loves Mittens!

  • Peckerwood_Pete

    While the man had little redeeming value as a President, I'd have had a 12 pack with George W. Bush (back in his drinking days, anyhow)…. Romney, on the other hand… I'd have to be totally shitfaced to even be in the same room as that wet dishrag of a personality……

  • Sacanagem

    Now there's a billboard face that simply cries out for 2-3 loads of buckshot.

    • kyeshinka

      You can get that with a 6 chicken nugget Happy Meal in Texas.

  • Monsieur_Grumpe
  • Come here a minute

    People would like Mitt better if he'd start trying to open locked doors at the end of press conferences. Also clearing brush, particularly if it was brush on their property that they wanted to have cleared.

  • I like that Romney guy! He's the black one with the wife named Michelle, right?

    • tessiee

      Yeah; they live in Portland, Ohio.

  • This is good news for John McCain.

  • decentcitizen

    People will forgive a lot of things but not boring. Mitt personifies boring. Bush was an idiot but at least he gave you something to talk about.

  • Pat_Pending

    Biden hasn't hugged ME yet!!! I WANT MY BIDEN HUG.

  • kyeshinka

    On behalf of the families of 4,000 American troops and the families of a quarter million dead Iraqis, no, we don't fucking miss you, you sick bastard sonofabitch.

  • CommieDad

    I keep hearing from the Wingnuts that "Obama is our worst president, ever." Hmm. So, Obama kept us out of a depression, passed health care reform, restored the respect of our friends and allies, umm, eliminated the oppression of gay people by the military, and oh yeah, got that mother fucker who ACTUALLY ordered the killing of 3000+ Americans.

    Bush ignored warnings of an impending terrorist attack, lowered taxes, started a war, lowered taxes more and deregulated banking, started another war, captured a dictator who HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH KILLING 3000+ AMERICANS and had NO WMDs, didn't catch the bastard who did, tortured prisoners making it hard to legally try them, lowered taxes, ruined the economy, cost MILLIONS of americans their jobs, houses, and financial future.

    Yeah, Obama must be our worst president. I miss you George, I really do.

    • also: compromised justice, gutted EPA, fought science at every level and every opportunity, bungled a natural disaster (political hack!), passed major entitlement legislation without funding it, took signing statements (overriding congress) to a new level, etc.

      also: fucking alito.

  • CommieDad

    Oh, I forgot to mention. Thank-you Bush for the permanent brain damage my brother-in-law received from a roadside bomb in a country that DID NOT ATTACK US but you thought NATIONAL GUARD TROOPS needed to go and fight in.

    • NellCote71

      You have more right than many to be angry. My sympathy to you and your family.

  • it would be cool if you could blingee a billboard.

  • Negropolis

    “I think Mitt Romney would be better at creating jobs. Also, I think Obama has a better economic plan for a successful future. I just like saying things on the phone. I’m so lonely! Please don’t hang up.”


  • ttommyunger

    In fairness to Clinton, he's only fucked 64% of Americans so far…..give the guy a break, he's doing the best he can, he's only human.

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