GOVERNOR SAMMICHES  4:30 pm September 26, 2012

Who Is Chris Christie Yelling at Today?

by Kris E. Benson

Here, enjoy this video of Chris Christie screaming at a reporter from New York who has the NERVE to ask him a follow-up question about the foreclosure fund. Why is New Jersey dead-last in the nation in terms of implementing a bunch of programs to help homeowners avoid foreclosure, the reporter may have wanted to ask? Or, alternatively, he might have wanted to say something like: that $300,000,000 the feds gave you—why are you not using it to help homeowners? Except we’re not sure what the reporter was trying to ask, because Chris Christie immediately starts yelling about blue moons and New Yorkers from out of town and HOW DARE HE, given that he (the reporter, not Chris Christie, “has his facts wrong”).

Yes, we know! We too are shocked that a Republican is professing to care so much about “facts.” Anyway, this same reporter then filed a report with WABC-TV about the foreclosure crisis in New Jersey, and the fact that Christie is sitting on the funds that are supposed to be helping struggling homeowners.

“Why has it taken so long, more than a year to get the money out to families?” Hoffer asked.

“Because the courts placed a moratorium on foreclosures,” Governor Christie answered.

“No the dispersing of the money. The $300 million?” Hoffer asked.

“The courts placed a moratorium on foreclosures so our policy was put on hold, waiting to see what the courts were ultimately going to do regarding foreclosure. And that’s why we haven’t moved any more quickly than we have already,” Governor Christie answered.

“The moratorium did not stop other states from helping families already facing foreclosure.” Hoffer said.

When Hoffer tried to press the Governor on this, it’s clear he had no real answer.

“Governor, this is an issue facing the state, why are you blowing it off?” Hoffer asked.

“Michael, please help me ignore him, go ahead,” Christie said.

While the governor refuses to answer, families face losing their homes as the denial letters keep coming.

Everyone loves a jolly fat man. Obviously, Christie 2016.

[ABC/DailyKos]

 

Hola wonkerados.

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{ 137 comments }

nounverb911 September 26, 2012 at 4:32 pm

All of us, Katie?

NorthStarSpanx September 26, 2012 at 10:08 pm

Ironically, Sarah Palin had a lot more cajones on executing programs with questionable legality.

I'm the mayor, I can do whatever I want until the courts tell me I can't. -Sarah Palin

ChernobylSoup September 26, 2012 at 4:32 pm

Obviously he ate the money.

hagajim September 26, 2012 at 4:35 pm

I figured he used it to buy sammiches at least.

actor212 September 26, 2012 at 4:39 pm

I think he has it in Mitt's secret Swiss bank account, earning cookies.

Negropolis September 27, 2012 at 2:02 am

He spent it all on Swiss Miss hot chocolate.

pdiddycornchips September 26, 2012 at 5:16 pm

I respectfully suggest Gov. Christi needs a moratorium on donuts.

starfanglednut September 26, 2012 at 6:51 pm

Dip it Ina little ranch dressing, and yuuummmmmy.

MittBorg September 26, 2012 at 7:34 pm

I wish he'd et Rmoney.

chicken_thief September 26, 2012 at 4:33 pm

I didn't watch it, so I'm just going with "the manager at the all you can eat buffet"?

Barbara_ September 26, 2012 at 4:33 pm

Several hot dog vendors at the football game, all at once?

nounverb911 September 26, 2012 at 4:34 pm

Christie should watch out for lightning the next time he floats over Lakehurst, New Jersey.

actor212 September 26, 2012 at 4:40 pm

Oh, the huge manatee!

memzilla September 26, 2012 at 5:02 pm
Tommy1733 September 26, 2012 at 4:34 pm

What a charmer – with a personality like that he doesn't need good looks to get ahead.

LibertyLover September 26, 2012 at 4:34 pm

This man is so pleasant to be around. Who wouldn't want to be BFF's with him?

Tommy1733 September 26, 2012 at 4:40 pm

Hands off – I saw him first!

Terry September 26, 2012 at 4:58 pm

There's enough of him to go around. And around.

MittBorg September 26, 2012 at 8:19 pm

In laps. With chalk, to mark off territory covered.

LibertyLover September 26, 2012 at 5:16 pm

That wasn't too difficult. I can see him from here and I live in Arizona. ;-)

sewollef September 26, 2012 at 5:16 pm

You could probably "Friend" him on Facebook…. but be careful he has more than one Facebook page since he's such an enormous zeppelin.

kittensdontlie September 26, 2012 at 5:38 pm

Yes, I am going to 'Fiend' him.

4TheTurnstiles September 26, 2012 at 4:35 pm

I'll say Bob Harper, because I want to see this fucker get his Biggest Loser Transformation Moment and stop being such a self-hating projecting borderline-personality drama queen.

LibertyLover September 26, 2012 at 5:06 pm

A routine makeover wouldn't do it for this fella. They'd have to do a personality transplant.

Jukesgrrl September 27, 2012 at 12:37 am

Or maybe a two-year special for Drs. Drew, Phil, and Oz.

ChernobylSoup September 26, 2012 at 4:35 pm

Perhaps the courts put a moratorium on foreclosures in order to give people more time to get help from the state? Maybe that wasn't the court's purpose behind the moratorium, but could have been a blessing in disguise anyway?

Sounds like a good reason to me to stop all state activities related to helping homeowners.*

*If I was the piece of shit heartless misanthrope of a fat cow governor of a traditionally corrupt state.

hagajim September 26, 2012 at 4:35 pm

Jolly fat man….but Chris is only one of those and it ain't jolly.

BadKitty904 September 26, 2012 at 4:52 pm

So was John Wayne Gacy…

Peckerwood_Pete September 26, 2012 at 4:35 pm

I'm surprised the living, breathing version of the Shoney's boy didn't blame the teachers union for this…

HELisforHEL September 27, 2012 at 9:40 am

HAHA He IS the Shoney's boy!

ManchuCandidate September 26, 2012 at 4:36 pm

Everyone caught in his event horizon.

actor212 September 26, 2012 at 4:40 pm

There's one black hole I DO! NOT! WANT!

Estproph September 26, 2012 at 4:36 pm

An empty chair?

TootsStansbury September 26, 2012 at 4:53 pm

A broken empty chair.

Esteev September 26, 2012 at 5:10 pm

A broken stage.

hagajim September 26, 2012 at 4:36 pm

Maybe we need to graduate him from Governor Sammiches to governor pizza pie…not sure you can get that gargantuan on sammiches.

shelwood46 September 26, 2012 at 5:48 pm

Governor Calzone?

UnholyMoses September 26, 2012 at 4:37 pm

"Everyone loves a jolly fat man."

Well, yeah, sure.

But what about a mean, total asshole of a fat man?

ChillBill September 26, 2012 at 4:37 pm

Did they use that excavator to move him from the helicopter to the podium?

Esteev September 26, 2012 at 5:11 pm

No they used it to cover up his "litter box."

Jukesgrrl September 27, 2012 at 12:38 am

Ewwwwwwwwww.

sailingthestyx September 26, 2012 at 6:12 pm

hahahahaha…thanks much!

BaldarTFlagass September 26, 2012 at 4:37 pm

Obviously, the money was funneled to Tony Soprano's construction company by way of a bunch of bogus contracts.

DerrickWildcat September 26, 2012 at 4:37 pm

Loudness is a substitute for intelligence in that neck of the woods.

FlownOver September 26, 2012 at 4:37 pm

Developing his own stench, for a campaign TBA.

chicken_thief September 26, 2012 at 4:37 pm

Christie is a much nicer person if you catch him coming out of a diner instead of holding him up from going in.

weejee September 26, 2012 at 4:38 pm

Obese-wan Conobi. The farce is strong in this one.

UnholyMoses September 26, 2012 at 4:41 pm

Obese-wan Canoli.

Fixed for Joyseeness.

actor212 September 26, 2012 at 4:50 pm

Leave the funds. Take the cannoli.

Tequila Mockingbird September 26, 2012 at 4:38 pm

I swear, his face looks like something a mongoloid kid put together at Build a Bear.

actor212 September 26, 2012 at 4:51 pm

I really want to have sex with this comment.

Pragmatist2 September 26, 2012 at 4:38 pm

A fat bully from New Jersey! Who wouldn't want to vote for that combo?

BadKitty904 September 26, 2012 at 4:53 pm

Youse gadda probl'm wid dat?

e_z September 26, 2012 at 4:38 pm

He better not be yelling at me, I've been dealing with the phone people and I am not in the fucking mood for his loud yammering.

SayItWithWookies September 26, 2012 at 4:38 pm

At least he brought his pooper scooper to the press conference.

fuflans September 26, 2012 at 4:38 pm

when chris christie sits around the house…

it turns into $300,000,000 in foreclosure funds.

gurukalehuru September 26, 2012 at 4:55 pm

When Chris Christie sits around the house….he sits AROUND the house.

actor212 September 26, 2012 at 4:39 pm

"Please help me ignore him"?

Hey, fat guy! Can't you stand on your own two lungs?

bikerlaureate September 26, 2012 at 5:12 pm

How does one even do that? Will Michael stick his fingers in the Governor's ears and go "la-la-la-la-la" ?

BaldarTFlagass September 26, 2012 at 4:39 pm

"I like foreclosures. When people in this state suffer, it gives my hero Bruce Springsteen more shit to write songs about. Did I mention that I like Bruce Springsteen? That's right. I'm cool."

Poindexter718 September 26, 2012 at 4:39 pm

The whole thing was very confusing.
You can hear the "beep … beep …beep" and yet Gov. Christie doesn't appear to be backing up.

UnholyMoses September 26, 2012 at 4:40 pm

Maybe Christie's saving the money so that he can pay Bruce Springsteen to play at his birthday party annual angioplasty.

keepwalkin September 26, 2012 at 4:40 pm

If Christie is Bluto I say Jindal is Olive Oyl!!

Geminisunmars September 26, 2012 at 5:04 pm

And dey is eatin' all the spinach!

Baconzgood September 26, 2012 at 4:40 pm

I could never understand Huttees without C-3P0

BadKitty904 September 26, 2012 at 4:59 pm

More like a down-market Baron Harkonnen…but without the wit and charm…

Texan_Bulldog September 26, 2012 at 4:41 pm

Can't wait for him to start running for president. When he holds babies, he'll give them Shaken Baby Syndrome and yell at them until they shit themselves.

HELisforHEL September 27, 2012 at 9:43 am

If he doesn't eat them first.

SoBeach September 26, 2012 at 4:42 pm

Stupid lamestream media, with their stupid gotcha questions about what public officials are doing with taxpayer money. They only ask questions like that because the governor is a republican. Good for Chris Christie! It's none of that reporter's business!

Indiepalin September 26, 2012 at 4:42 pm

"Sitting on the funds." I am appalled at the sophomoric humour found on this cite.

memzilla September 26, 2012 at 4:42 pm

Estimable Editrix:

1. Does Wonkette's TOS prohibit me from wishing that Chris Christie wind up like Mr. Creosote?

2. Can we start a "Mints For Christie" Fund?

actor212 September 26, 2012 at 4:44 pm

He may already be well-stocked

It's like Willy Wonka, only less friendly.

Poindexter718 September 26, 2012 at 4:44 pm

I'd donate a "waffer thin" in a second!

Mittens Howell, III September 26, 2012 at 4:42 pm

Rawr! Rawrbeddah-hoerbeddah HOAGIE!!

Reeaagh! Rawrbeddah-Rawrbeddah! CHEEZBURGER!!

elviouslyqueer September 26, 2012 at 4:54 pm

Also, HULK SMASH!!11100!11!000! DONUTS ONION RINGS ENDLESS BUFFET garglemfffftt!!!

Mittens Howell, III September 26, 2012 at 4:43 pm

Christie to Reporter: "Get your Fat Waist!"

HogeyeGrex September 26, 2012 at 5:11 pm

Funny. I heard that as "Get In Mah Belly!"

Fairtackle September 26, 2012 at 4:43 pm

the guy who spray painted "Revolution" on his ass.

Mittens Howell, III September 26, 2012 at 4:58 pm

Actually, he wrote this:

Revolution! you know, like a takeover. Sometimes violent but they can be peaceful. Although , either way can be fraught. Anyway, Revolution!! Oh looky, I still have room for a smiley face … :)

fuflans September 26, 2012 at 4:44 pm

i would like to see an anger-palooza between billy joe armstrong vs chris christie.

ph7 September 26, 2012 at 4:45 pm

“Michael, please help me ignore him, go ahead,” Christie said.

Christie has an Ignoring Assistant? I wonder what that pays.

actor212 September 26, 2012 at 4:52 pm

He tries not to think about it.

Exhausted66 September 26, 2012 at 4:57 pm

Maybe he got the idea from Bruce Sprimgsteen. (See: ignoring Chris Christie.)

Radiotherapy September 26, 2012 at 5:02 pm

$300 million, apparently.

LibertyLover September 26, 2012 at 4:46 pm

It's Hard To Be a Saint in the City but if you have a Hungry Heart you can look for the Human Touch down in Jungleland. But if you are Christie, it's Easy Money In the Land of Hopes and Dreams because the homeowners have been Held Up Without a Gun. I hope Christie gets visited by the Ghost of Tom Joad and learns that We Take Care of Our Own.

HELisforHEL September 27, 2012 at 9:46 am

Well done!

Hammiepants September 26, 2012 at 4:48 pm

I so hope one of his mob connections, er, WASTE MANAGEMENT CONSTITUENTS caps him and he ends up in a landfill somewhere near Passaic. If there is a big enough landfill.

CalamityJames September 26, 2012 at 4:56 pm

That sounds like some vicious voting.

Lionel[redacted]Esq September 26, 2012 at 4:49 pm

Christie is just pining for the old days when he could simply dump people into the Hudson.

SpiderCrab September 26, 2012 at 4:50 pm

Charmless thug.

BigSkullF*ckingDog September 26, 2012 at 4:51 pm

Oh, settle down and eat this tub of lard. It will make you feel better. Or die. Whatevs.

littlebigdaddy September 26, 2012 at 4:51 pm

He invested it in a chain of tanning salons owned by Snooki?

elviouslyqueer September 26, 2012 at 4:51 pm

“Michael, please help me ignore him, go ahead,” Christie said.

Funny, I say this every time I see Chris Christie, Mittster, Gillian Ryan… shit, pretty much any Republican who appears in any type of media.

skmind September 26, 2012 at 4:52 pm

Everyone loves a jolly fat man. Obviously, Christie 2016.

No, not Christie. Newt. America will warm up to Callista as they have to Ann.

Newt will make sure that space shuttles are equipped with open windows as we establish a lunar base.

LibertyLover September 26, 2012 at 5:19 pm

Perhaps Callista can borrow that lovely leather number that Egg wore on Leno last night. I'm sure she already has the boots to match.

MissTaken September 26, 2012 at 4:52 pm

He needs an a ice cream cone. I find that really gives the yelling a nice sense of occasion.

kittensdontlie September 26, 2012 at 5:46 pm

On these occasions, the most practical food for a man of such sophistication, is the meatball sub. Flinging the tomato-sauced balls at a indelicate questioner, will say more than mere words ever could.

Negropolis September 27, 2012 at 2:08 am

It also keeps his blood sugar from crashing.

Exhausted66 September 26, 2012 at 4:55 pm

Christie has a personal foreclosure plan in place where he comes and sits around your house. Because when Chris Christie sits around your house…

HogeyeGrex September 26, 2012 at 5:12 pm

…There's nothing left but kindling?

Jus_Wonderin September 26, 2012 at 5:34 pm

…something, something about his Mom and her footwear???

Guppy September 26, 2012 at 11:23 pm

Hitler?

Baconzgood September 26, 2012 at 4:56 pm

"You have to come to EVERY press conference to ask questions or I'll eat you"

-Blimpy Boy-

Ayn Rand Paul Tard September 26, 2012 at 4:57 pm

He coulda just said 'Obama. That's why.'

Beowoof September 26, 2012 at 5:02 pm

Fat fuck said what?

JackObin September 26, 2012 at 5:03 pm

Chris Krispy Kreme. How has that lipid avoided a myocardial infarction?

Come here a minute September 26, 2012 at 5:08 pm

Mitt Romney made a colossal blunder failing to choose Chris Christie as his running mate.

Jus_Wonderin September 26, 2012 at 5:33 pm

CC looks like he could use some running. If he didn't explode during the activity.

LibertyLover September 26, 2012 at 5:09 pm

For the time being his administration will be passing out numbers to reporters to see who will get yelled at next… It will be a lottery during his next presser.

weejee September 26, 2012 at 5:09 pm

OT

Mittens' campaign is overjoyed that Willard has landed the cover of the most esteemed newzmag evah!!!

Geminisunmars September 26, 2012 at 5:14 pm

Did you build that?

weejee September 26, 2012 at 5:17 pm

It's for reallz.

tee hee

Robman2 September 26, 2012 at 5:13 pm

This guy is way too thin skinned to run for national office, he would only appeal to an grey white old men, and by 2016, that demographic will be even smaller than today.

The Tony Soprano routine is tiresome, can't he see that?

Negropolis September 27, 2012 at 2:10 am

A skin can get really thin when it's stretched as much as Christie's is.

KeepFnThatChicken September 26, 2012 at 5:16 pm

Still want to protest the fat jokes.

Geminisunmars September 26, 2012 at 5:48 pm

I know. Please don't be hating because he (or someone) is ugly or fat. Be hating because he is evil and hate filled.

pdiddycornchips September 26, 2012 at 5:18 pm

Biggest loser or biggest loser contestant?

rocktonsam September 26, 2012 at 5:28 pm

Chrisco must be upset because the state is giving him less portions for lunch just like the schools in Scott Walker's Wisconsin

Pithaughn September 26, 2012 at 5:50 pm

Ok so the guy is morbidly obese, that does not mean he cannot be an effective executive. Some of these comments are insensitive to fat people you know?
Personally, I would not vote for him, but I don't think it would be the end of the world if he was POTUS.

Negropolis September 27, 2012 at 2:11 am

No, no. It really would.

TribecaMike September 26, 2012 at 5:56 pm

It was funnier in the original Huttese.

vaginista September 26, 2012 at 5:58 pm

I liked his character on the Soprano's a lot better than this douchy politician he's playing now.

Nostrildamus September 26, 2012 at 6:02 pm

I would find Christie more appealing if I was a parfumiere.

TribecaMike September 26, 2012 at 6:15 pm
dennis1943 September 26, 2012 at 6:25 pm

He's mellowed since his younger days……..
http://home.bellsouth.net/coDataImages/p/Groups/1

RaflcaFlkaFlame September 26, 2012 at 6:27 pm

Blah guy, can you please just FIX NJ Transit? All of this other jumbo bumbo is irrelevant If I have to ride on another car from 1908 or sit on the train for 8.3 hours to get from NY Penn to Newark Airport, then….. well…..

LibrarianX September 26, 2012 at 6:37 pm

Yelling? Nah – that's just gas.

DustBowlBlues September 26, 2012 at 6:41 pm

Will this fat fuck's schtick ever get old in NJ? Surely this phony tub-of-lard will be dead at the polls. By votes.

owhatever September 26, 2012 at 6:56 pm

Is it just me, or does Governor Christie seem a bit chubby?

chascates September 26, 2012 at 7:01 pm

Eventually we'll be treated to a video showing his fatal heart attack during an anger jag. It will become one of the most memorable video clips of the 21st century and be set to hundreds of songs.

docterry6973 September 26, 2012 at 10:26 pm

A cheap bully and loudmouth. The perpetual sneer and the bluster disgust me. Can you imagine Christie on the international stage? Trying to bully the UK or Germany as if their leaders are Jersey City aldermen? I so hope that we see Christie heading the GOP ticket in 16. All of my fake IDs will be voting against him.

DahBoner September 26, 2012 at 10:34 pm

$300,000,000.00

Now we know why there is a world-wide shortage of bacon.

Negropolis September 27, 2012 at 2:05 am

"What did you do with the money?" is the first question any good reporter in New Jersey should ask…about anything. Where the money go? To the Mafia. They've got the best guy on the inside any money could buy, now.

ttommyunger September 27, 2012 at 8:10 am

I am depressed…All these cheap shots and ad hominem attacks about the Governor's obesity simply detract from the real issue: which is that he is a flaming asshole.

Joey_Blau September 27, 2012 at 9:49 am

well.. uh.. the reporter kinda messed it up.. he had one question, and said he had another. and Christie said ok what is it .. and the guy went off on a speach.. which pisses Christie off. The reporter was trying to run th press conference by making a speach and not asking a question.

He should have gone right to "Why not help those already forclosed on?" instead of his statements.

not that Christie isn't a blowhard or anything.

BZ1 September 27, 2012 at 10:00 am

Who elects these buffoons?

stitch94133 September 27, 2012 at 10:35 am

Anyone who thinks this bag of shit will be a contender in 2016 probably is in the same league with people who think Mittens can pull off 2012.

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