Halfway There No beheadings again this time! We are beginning to think Vice frontloaded their seven-part series!

Parts One, Two, and Three.


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  • nounverb911

    Are these the varmints that Mitt used to hunt?

  • The Mormons Broke Bad!

  • Let me know when they get to the bunga-bunga, someone?

    • Radiotherapy

      But first a little beheading.

  • BloviateMe

    There's 2 minutes missing in the middle of this.____Consider the series discredited.

  • LibertyLover

    Not one fuzzy penis in that whole segment.

  • "Moroni Vice" is the worst Mormon show ever.

    • BoatOfVelociraptors

      They're moving 300 kilos of pure uncut caffeine!

  • Maybe the last episode will be nothing but machete action!

  • CrunchyKnee

    Typical anti-climactic hipster drivel. We need another war to…oh, wait, never mind.

  • sbj1964

    Next on Fox! The show you have all been waiting for!The Mormon House wives of Mexico.

    • bikerlaureate

      Real Homemakers of Chihuahua.

  • Steverino247

    Needs moar head.

    On a more serious note, this conflict is a real tragedy inflicted on the (mostly) wonderful people of Mexico and I hope it ends soon. Now, back to the snark…

  • Generation[redacted]

    Hey mormons can be bad asses. Especially when they go all desert survivalist. Biggest private gun collection I ever saw was in a mormon house and it filled a room.

    • sbj1964

      Yes Mormons are killers according to they're own history except they normally dress up as Indians,and kill/Massacre Christians trying to settle the west.

      • sullivanst

        Or just run around assassinating each other, viz. part 2.

        • Boojum

          Look at Bad Harry Reid, for example, all cutting Mitt's head off on the Senate floor.

          • sullivanst

            Mitt cut his own head off in May, Harry just made sexytime with the cranium.

    • doloras

      Desert survivalists? Is Mitt Romney's real name Atreides?

  • BigSkullF*ckingDog

    These days, if no one gets beheaded or skullf*cked, it's hardly worth watching. Soooo, I probly won't.

  • kittensdontlie

    I am having trouble deciphering the symbolism of the Chihuahua statue, the soldier with the two pigeon figurines. 'A bird in the hand, is worth two on the sombrero?…

  • hagajim

    Good thing there aren't any blahs in this documentary. I will say that I'm not sure where they're going with this now….might be hipster drivel after all.

  • glasspusher

    What?!?! Oh, never mind. I thought it said shooting up with the Mexican cartels.

    • LionHeartSoyDog


      My question was, how do they get the cartels to dissolve enough to avoid clogging the needle?

      (HoboSpaceJunkie, where are you now?).

  • These guys seem as convincingly Mormon-like as Mittens mugging as a mestizo.

    • LionHeartSoyDog

      i doubt that mittens can mug a mestizo, successfully.

  • UnholyMoses

    Is this video going to make it more or less likely that the U.S. will be infested with cheap, seedy-as-all-hell ditch weed from Mexico instead of the nice, fluffy, sticky-icky Canadian stuff?

    'Cause that's all that matters, really.

    • Lascauxcaveman

      In CO, WA, and OR it will mostly be prime homegrown after this November.

      : )

      • emmelemm

        Doesn't the WA initiative actually still prohibit homegrowing? (I'm not super hip on the intricacies of weed bills.)

        • OneDollarJuana

          It won't pass anyway, because Costco isn't behind it to the tune of $20 million, as they were for the liquor initiative.

        • Technically, it prohibits home grown, as you would have to make all purchases at a state licensed store.

          In practice…..

          • emmelemm

            Good to know. I was only asking for a friend…

  • Jesús Malverde? Didn't he play 2nd base for a couple of teams in the 80s, early 90s? Good at taking-out the lead runner and then unload his canon to get the guy at first for a double killing.

    • James Michael Curley

      That was until he overthrew and hit Keith Olbermann's mother in the head.

      • emmelemm

        Is that some sort of Owen Meany reference, or is it really just all about baseball and thus I'm missing it entirely?

        • That works, and I'd love to take credit for that, but I was just taking the narco patron saint and playing with some bazebawl terms like 'double killing.' That said, regarding JMC's comment about Olbermann, I thought it was Keith that had TBI brain injury problems, not his mother. Perhaps she did get hit in the head with a baseball and that would explain why she repeatedly dropped ol' Keith on his little head. No stuffing hand grenades in the toilet here – just postings

          • emmelemm

            Oh, I didn't think *your* post was anything more than baseball.

            It was the "hit your mother in the head with a ball" part that went all John Irving on me.

        • James Michael Curley

          After Chuck Knoblauch signed a really big contract with the Yankees he began to develop what us old timers used to call ‘the yipps’, loosing accuracy in his throws to first base. One sailed into the stands and hit Keith Olbermann’s mother in the face while Olbermann was with ESPN. Obermann talked about it for years so that after he was off ESPN any time the subject of baseball came up on his ‘news’ shows it was known he would mention it.

  • ChocolateRomney

    There's only one way to infiltrate the latino mean cartels and that's to go native, mis amigos.

    • LionHeartSoyDog

      It's Raining Chocolate Rmoney.

  • cheetojeebus

    OT Tweety had a bit tonight about the PA Sponsor of the voter ID law- basically saying anybody being disenfranchised is too lazy to get an id.

    • LibertyLover

      Self-righteous pinhead.

  • I'm really surprised that instead of his cheesy spray tan Mittens didn't bust out a full blown Luchadores mask/costume at that Univision thing

  • LibrarianX

    I used to bullseye womp rats in my T-16 back home, they're not much bigger than two meters.

    • BloviateMe

      I just had a nerdgasm.

  • Fox n Fiends

    MSM will pick this series up soon with the message that coastal-liberal-elitist cokeheads are causing the narco terrorism that is invading America.

  • YouBetcha

    This again?

  • comrad_darkness

    This is like a soap opera, insufficient advancement of the plot each episode.

  • ahnc

    And just when we thought things couldn't possibly get weirder than dog on the roof, etch-a-sketch, insulting the Brits, Clint Eastwood talking to a chair,and Mitt calling 47% of the US moochers, IT has gotten weirder.
    Geez Louise, there is over 6 weeks left until the election.
    I want a taco for some reason.

  • chascates

    I'll just wait until the full-length movie comes out and not watch that.

  • Really, hasn't Mexico suffered enough?

  • Jus_Wonderin

    "Ay, ay, ay, ay! oh, I am dee Frito Bandito."

    Too soon?

  • LibertyLover

    "I think it's just a shame that these Mormons aren't allowed to go sleeveless. Everyone should have a right to bare arms. I mean honestly, maybe it's just too hot outside and you don't want to wear a shirt with sleeves…."

    Jane Curtin: "No, No , No….they're talking about the right to bear arms."

    Emily Latella: "What's that? That's silly, what are they going to do with a bunch of bear arms? Hmmm…"

    Jane Curtin: "No, Bear arms, bear arms…. the right to have and carry guns…."

    Emily Latella: "Oh…"

    Emily Latella ….. Never mind"

  • Terry

    I finally caught up on these and they weren't what I expected. Seems like a good overview of a really bad situation. The link to Mitt is tenuous and really doesn't belong. I guess it's just there to hook folks in.

  • ttommyunger

    Oddly, I find myself pulling for the Cartels.

  • Toomush_Infer

    Okay, now I'm confused….I thought this was about Mormons, now you bring in Watchtowers – isn't that some sort of Seventh Day Adventists, or the folks who knock on your door while you're in your underwear on Saturday…?

  • MinAgain

    "Drug Cartels vs. Mormons" is the worst movie in the Predator franchise.

  • DahBoner

    OK, what do Jerry Garcia, David Koresh and Mormons have in common?

    15 year olds screwed them in order to get closer to God.


  • Negropolis

    Apropos of very little, this host is extremely Canadian. I picked it up a few seconds into the video.

    As for the video, if the colonia Mormons are so hard-up on wanting guns, they should just come back to America.

    • DahBoner

      Apparently, screwing 15 year olds is legal in Mexico…

      • Negropolis

        I bet it's legal in quite a few states in the South.

  • calliecallie

    Just caught up on the series. Interesting new information, but not what I was hoping for. (Although I guess it's clear Mitt was born to be a fan of the second amendment.)

    I'm going to have to go back to Episode One, because somehow I MISSED the beheading! But not tonight…tonight, Dos Equis para mio.

  • WRF??????? The Lebaron Colony are in no way connected to the Romneys. The Romneys are Mormons who emigrated to Mexico in the 1890s. The Lebaron group didn't even show up in Mexico until the 1930s, and most Mormons consider them a sect that sprang from Mormonism… it's like calling Episcopalians Roman Catholics. They achieved some notoriety back in the late 1970s when one of the sons of the patriarch, Ervil Lebaron, split with his brother to found a breakaway-breakaway sect, and launched a jihad throughout northern Mexico and the southwest U.S., killing off several of his own relations, and other "heretics". His daughter was only caught last year. That aside, how much of the Lebaron colony's troubles have to do with "drug lords" and how much to do with fights over water rights with their indigenous and Mennonite neighbors is a matter of speculation.

    Jesus Malverde is not the "patron saint of drug lords," but a popular santone (unofficial saint) throughout Sinaloa. Yes, "drug lords" probably pay him homage too, but when will people figure out that VICE is probably even worse than the Canada Post and Fox News when it comes to coverage of Mexican affairs. C'mon, Wonkette, you can do better than this!

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      VICE will not allow its programming to be dictated by fact checkers!

    • EllenStranger

      Surely you mean the National Post? Or are you talking about the little mini-documentaries Canada Post (the actual post office) used to make about Superman and Laura Secord in the War of 1812? In which case, yeah, their Mexican affairs coverage really was pretty shit.

    • Redgyal

      Thanks for clearing that up. This series seems more like a vote Romney ad than anytthing else.

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