SCANDAL AND NO COVERUP  9:27 am September 17, 2012

Texas Cosmetology Class Closed Due To Gayness

by Rich Abdill

MAKEUP YAYTerrrrrible news out of Texas, you guys. There’s this adult cosmetology class, see, and one of the people who signed up was a guy. And — AND — he might be… a gay.

This was particularly upsetting to Thomas Amons, the principal with the Beaumont Independent School District who oversees the technical school. He wanted the man, Kwmane Gray, out of the class, presumably to prevent the other students from being infected with a horrible disease, the symptoms of which include you act like a totally normal person but bigots freak out when they see you.

From the Southeast Texas Examiner:

“As soon as we got a student that (Amons) thought was gay, that was the end. He saw (Gray) come into the class, and then he came to get me out of there,” [teacher Cequada] Clark said of Principal Amons, a man who also serves as a deacon at Antioch Missionary Baptist Church. The instructor said she was told to tell Gray he wasn’t welcome in the program. Feeling a moral objection to what was taking place, she refused. “I told (Amons) if he wanted to tell that young man that, he would need to do that himself.”

(Lesson for future executors of prejudice: If you’re going to discriminate, at least do it yourself, eh?)

A problem arose here, however: The legal department pointed out that you can’t just be kicking gay people out of stuff, because of “laws” and “that is shitty to the max.”

Don’t worry, though — hate always finds a way.

Amons shut down the whole class.

“I don’t understand this. I really don’t,” Clark said. “(Amons) told me he would rather shut down the program altogether than to have ‘riff-raff’ like that in the program. The next day, he shut down the program.”

That’s a real shame for the people in that class. Thank goodness, though, that a brave teacher like Cequada Clark can stand up for justice in This, The Greatest of Americas.

UPDATES: Instructor Cequada Clark informed The Examiner on Thursday evening, Sept. 13, that she has been asked to turn in her keys and receipt book, terminating her employment with BISD.

Oh.

[Examiner, via Patheos]

 

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{ 214 comments }

James Michael Curley September 17, 2012 at 9:30 am

Means some ugly corpses in TX with a cosmetologist shortage.

actor212 September 17, 2012 at 9:40 am

It's OK, the drought will mummify them.

James Michael Curley September 17, 2012 at 10:42 am

I'm flashing on Jan Brewer here?

Beach_Bubba_Tex September 17, 2012 at 10:03 am

Nahh, taxidermists do most of the work anyway. Most homes like to pose the corpses in the bushes with weapons drawn

oenspiek September 17, 2012 at 10:27 am

That's a way to get weapons stolen!

actor212 September 17, 2012 at 11:24 am

They can take my guns when they can pry them from my…oh.

James Michael Curley September 17, 2012 at 12:19 pm

So that explains the Zapruder film.

GunToting[Redacted] September 17, 2012 at 9:32 am

There's a funny comment in here about spite, noses, and cosmetology, but I'm too hung over to find it.

tracyhasfun September 18, 2012 at 4:53 pm

We gotcha.

Toomush_Infer September 17, 2012 at 9:32 am

There's a lot of women in Texas not able to look like women because of this….just sayin…

PsycWench September 17, 2012 at 9:48 am

But a lot of women in Texas look like overweight mannequins so that's OK.

smitallica September 17, 2012 at 9:32 am

And you know, you just KNOW, that Principal Amons, deacon at the Antioch Missionary Baptist Church, is a TEXTBOOK self-loathing, rentboy-hiring, "Glee"-downloading, cock-mongering closet case.

UW8316154 September 17, 2012 at 10:07 am

Better set Amons up with Marcus for some "counseling", STAT!

Biff September 17, 2012 at 10:23 am

Perhaps they just need to branch out a little?

ManchuCandidate September 17, 2012 at 9:32 am

It's true. All the ugly in the world can't be covered up by the application of makeup.

thatsitfortheother1 September 17, 2012 at 9:35 am

See also Sarah Palin.

weejee September 17, 2012 at 9:37 am

'Zactly so. No matter what Deacon Principal Amons does or layers of foundation that he applies ol' Thomas is always going to look round and red and stained about the edges like the asshole that he truly is.

chicken_thief September 17, 2012 at 10:56 am

What?!

~ Joan Rivers

BadKitty904 September 17, 2012 at 9:32 am

I'm sensing potential for a new school mascot: The Beaumont Bigots

"Two-Four-Six-Eight-We Just Love to Discriminate! Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaate, TEAM!"

actor212 September 17, 2012 at 9:37 am

Gimme a "G"! Gimme an "A"! Gimme a "Y"! What does that spell?

NOT HERE!

thatsitfortheother1 September 17, 2012 at 9:40 am

Gimme an "F"!

Wrong story, maybe?

Misty Malarky September 17, 2012 at 9:34 am

Wish I'd thought to try this in that high school physics class I flunked.

finallyhappy September 17, 2012 at 9:40 am

I think I was in that class was it Harvard Project Physics with Mr. Appel- the world's very worst science teacher??

kittensdontlie September 17, 2012 at 10:44 am

Sorry, being gay and a physics student, is just not believable.

BaldarTFlagass September 17, 2012 at 11:32 am

Yes, physicists are among the most virile, masculine and macho of the physical science majors. We geology majors would always run in fear when the physicists rolled into the student union after a tough lab session.

kittensdontlie September 17, 2012 at 8:19 pm

There's alot of gay in the Bing Bang Theory, and Einstein's loafers but his hair, not gay. I retract my previous statement retroactively.

weejee September 17, 2012 at 9:34 am

what a fuckhead

/ 'lock 'n load' from the reptilian core rapidly percolating to the top of the subconscious to wrestle with the pacifist conscious.

AlterNewt September 17, 2012 at 9:34 am

Bigotry. Texas. Shocking.

Dashboard Buddha September 17, 2012 at 9:35 am

Well, to be fair, Kwmane Gray does sound like C'mon, be gay.

Also this…isn't Antioch Missionary Baptist Church just the most rednecky name you could hope for in a church?

thatsitfortheother1 September 17, 2012 at 9:42 am

All things considered, I'd rather be in the Antioch in Turkey.

BaldarTFlagass September 17, 2012 at 9:44 am

"Amons shut down the whole class."

Maybe he used the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch to blow it up.

eggsacklywright September 17, 2012 at 9:48 am

I don't understand all this Antioch business. I've always been pro-och meself.

BadKitty904 September 17, 2012 at 9:45 am

In re: "Antioch Baptist Church" – rednecky enough to have been parodied by Charlie-freekin'-Daniels as far back as 1973, in his song "Uneasy Rider"…

"I'm a faithful follower of Brother John Birch,
And I belong to the Antioch Baptist Church,
And I ain't even got a garage, you can call home and ask my wife!"

Dashboard Buddha September 17, 2012 at 9:50 am

LOL…thanks..I know the name sounded familiar.

Chet Kincaid_ September 17, 2012 at 9:50 am

Black deacon, black discrimination victim. Actually, "Antioch" is a very black-Churchy name. It's kind of ridiculous — do you know how many gay male music directors there are in black churches?

PubOption September 17, 2012 at 10:46 am

Katie?

actor212 September 17, 2012 at 9:36 am

In fairness, the other students complained he'd break the grading curve.

BaldarTFlagass September 17, 2012 at 9:41 am

That's a very win-nish comment there.

thatsitfortheother1 September 17, 2012 at 9:47 am

Win-like.

CleverSobriquet September 17, 2012 at 9:50 am

Win-some lose some

Dashboard Buddha September 17, 2012 at 9:51 am

Winsome

kittensdontlie September 17, 2012 at 9:59 am

Yes, and being charitable, the instructor might have been afraid the student knew more than the teacher.

Limeylizzie September 17, 2012 at 9:37 am

Remember that photo of me where you were all saying how beautiful I am? That would not be so, were it not for the gays. My hair, any and all make-up tips and just the general fabulousness of the gays makes me happy and smiley.

actor212 September 17, 2012 at 9:38 am

I call bullshit! You'd be gorgeous covered in dung.

Boojum September 17, 2012 at 9:41 am

Ew. Yes, but ew.

thatsitfortheother1 September 17, 2012 at 9:44 am

You're not part dung beetle, are you?

Limeylizzie September 17, 2012 at 9:46 am

Part reptile.

actor212 September 17, 2012 at 9:51 am

I can't help it, it comes with my Book of the Month

BadKitty904 September 17, 2012 at 9:46 am

It's a dirty job, but we homos love to do it! ;0)

Limeylizzie September 17, 2012 at 9:50 am

and we love you for it, also the theatre .

Barbara_ September 17, 2012 at 9:52 am

Thanks for your dedication, BadKitty!

Dashboard Buddha September 17, 2012 at 9:51 am

Wait…photo? Where? Are you folks holding out on me??

actor212 September 17, 2012 at 9:54 am

Scoll back to the NYC drinky thingie thread.

Bezoar September 17, 2012 at 9:59 am

In all seriousness, it makes me wonder what the world would be like if all the gays went, or had gone, "Galt".

starfanglednut September 17, 2012 at 10:37 am

Galt's gulch would be decorated fabulously.

Biff September 17, 2012 at 10:43 am

Um, no, I do not remember that picture, I'm sure I would if I had seen it…

tessiee September 17, 2012 at 12:11 pm

"Remember that photo of me where you were all saying how beautiful I am?"

*struggles to be tactful*
That…
would not be…
your avatar picture…
would it?

HistoriCat September 17, 2012 at 12:13 pm

You guys really need to go back to the NYC drinky-thingy post.

Limeylizzie September 17, 2012 at 1:35 pm

That would be awesomely polite of the Wonkette if I did mean the avatar and they were all”Oh you look beautiful”.

Veritas78 September 17, 2012 at 8:40 pm

Not gonna happen.

actor212 September 17, 2012 at 9:37 am

BTW, Rich, nice photo of Heidi Klum.

thatsitfortheother1 September 17, 2012 at 9:38 am

You know that I'm not evil
Just wanna have some fun
There's so much shit in Texas
I'm bound to step in some
– J Winter

freakishlywrong September 17, 2012 at 9:39 am

Really Texas? Cosmetology? Gay?

Limeylizzie September 17, 2012 at 9:47 am

I know, crazy right? No wonder so many woman there, not Wonketteers of course, have such terrible hair , if you don't let the gays do your hair you will look like shit.

SorosBot September 17, 2012 at 9:59 am

That would explain the ugly giant big hair and clown levels of makeup that Southern women seem to love and fail to realize makes them look hideous.

freakishlywrong September 17, 2012 at 10:02 am

For the mercifully brief time I was in Texas, (Houston), all the gays were fabulous and everyone loved them. This was years ago, however.

SorosBot September 17, 2012 at 10:12 am

Houston currently has a lesbian mayor; the rest of Texas, however, is not so friendly to the gays.

CleverSobriquet September 17, 2012 at 9:52 am

It all make sense to me now. I was wondering how the hell they could have a school of cosmology in Tejas

Spurning Beer September 17, 2012 at 10:10 am

The reason it's in the Vocational School is the overlap with the industrial trades of construction, welding, plastering, and painting. That Texas Woman look requires some heavy-duty technology.

Boojum September 17, 2012 at 10:25 am

It was co-taught with the drywall class.

AddHomonym September 17, 2012 at 10:55 am

Can't spell "sparkle" without "spackle."

tessiee September 17, 2012 at 12:15 pm

Mercy Dee's Soul Kitchen, House of Beauty Culture, and School of Martial Arts — actual place in Durham, NC

Terry September 17, 2012 at 9:39 am

You know the good thing about Beaumont, TX? It doesn't take too long to drive past it. Honestly, that is one sucky town and the chemical plants will probably give you cancer, too.

Texan_Bulldog September 17, 2012 at 9:44 am

Beaumont is a horrible area. I'm surprised there aren't more 3-eyed children born there with all the oil refineries seriously polluting the air and water.

BaldarTFlagass September 17, 2012 at 9:51 am

Ah yes, The Golden Triangle. If they have to give the world an enema, that's where they'll stick the tube.

CleverSobriquet September 17, 2012 at 9:53 am

splains the need for the cosmetology

Biff September 17, 2012 at 10:46 am

I did have some edible BBQ the times I've been stuck there on my way to somewhere else. Aside from that giant wad of white bread they serve with it, that is.

Terry September 17, 2012 at 10:57 am

Stop at Al-T's in Winnie, instead. Good Cajun food.

Biff September 17, 2012 at 12:30 pm

No offense if you're from down there or anything, but I hope to god I never set foot in Texas again! Shame it's on the way to or from so many other more desirable places, though.

Terry September 17, 2012 at 12:38 pm

I lived in Texas a long time, then in south Louisiana after that. There are some bright spots, some good people, but they're overshadowed by some cruel bastards.

Peckerwood_Pete September 17, 2012 at 9:39 am

Cool… scientists finally found a way to crossbreed Boy George with John Wayne Gacy… cool pic.

In all seriousness though… I would never allow a heterosexual man to cut my hair. That's just me….

Limeylizzie September 17, 2012 at 9:48 am

Neither would I, everyone knows it's either a woman or a gay man that will make you look good.

CthuNHu September 17, 2012 at 10:35 am

For some people, not allowing a heterosexual man to cut their hair is not an option.

Sacanagem September 17, 2012 at 10:52 am

Boy George as Leigh Bowery, who if you don't know, you should:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Leigh_Bowery

tessiee September 17, 2012 at 12:17 pm

If for no other reason than his home town is named "Sunshine". Now how can you not like somebody who actually comes from Sunshine?

Boojum September 17, 2012 at 9:39 am

This will last about as long as it takes to scrawl "Compaint" and "Motion for Temporary Injunction" on a napkin and drunkenly stagger over to the courthouse. There's this Constitushun thing, about which the teabaggers are always moaning and mooning. It even protects teh ghey.

Nothingisamiss September 17, 2012 at 11:19 am

You liberals, always thinking laws protect those other people.

poorgradstudent September 17, 2012 at 9:39 am

Wait, he shut down the *whole* program?!

This reminds me of the Catholic Church threatening to end their charity programs in DC just because of the mere chance that the DC government might require them to *gasp* place children with same-sex couples. It's almost as if the Catholic higher-ups and Mr. Amons have in common a tendency to only value their religion when it allows them to feel superior to certain groups of people! It's fucking sick, and I'm no theologian but I'm damn sure that even Jesus would go all "moneychangers at the temple" on these people's asses. .

PsycWench September 17, 2012 at 9:54 am

It's almost as if the Catholic higher-ups and Mr. Amons have in common a tendency to only value their religion when it allows them to feel superior to certain groups of people!
I question your use of the word "almost".

poorgradstudent September 17, 2012 at 10:03 am

Oh, trust me, it was a sarcastic "almost."

PsycWench September 17, 2012 at 10:10 am

Ah, I forgot where i was.

tessiee September 17, 2012 at 12:21 pm

It's almost as if the religious nuts like having a convenient excuse not to follow the law when they don't feel like it.

Didn't that Jesus fella of theirs say something about rendering unto Caesar that which is Caesar's?

Estproph September 17, 2012 at 9:40 am

Let me guess – the picture you posted for this article is a picture of Principal Amons.

eggsacklywright September 17, 2012 at 9:50 am

Yes, and that's BEFORE they cosmetologized him.

mrblifil September 17, 2012 at 9:40 am

Do Wrongful Termination laws in Texas carry any weight? Didn't think so.

Boojum September 17, 2012 at 9:45 am

No, but Title IX does, and it protects against retaliation for gender discrimination in edumacashunal programs.

And discrimination against a man for failing to conform to gender stereotypes is gender discrimination.

PsycWench September 17, 2012 at 10:02 am

True! We got all Title-IX-educated here at my college to where I'm afraid to tell an off-color joke, so I'm surprised this guy didn't foresee opening himself up to a suit.
Actually, strike that, I'm not surprised.

Boojum September 17, 2012 at 10:23 am

Retaliation for complaining about, etc., I mean.

Spurning Beer September 17, 2012 at 10:13 am

No, they don't apply, and when they say "termination," they're not talking about being fired.

Boojum September 17, 2012 at 10:28 am

Them are standin' yore ground laws. Principal Anus was afraid that he would have to run over and suck Gray's dick, if he didn't expel him. He was just standing his ground against sinful thoughts.

tessiee September 17, 2012 at 12:26 pm

"Do Wrongful Termination laws in Texas carry any weight?"

Wrongful termination laws no longer carry any weight anywhere.
Companies can usually afford more and better legal representation than some unemployed schmoe, and have ways of getting around technicalities ("he wasn't let go, his position was eliminated", and then mysteriously gets reinstated six months down the road with a twenty year old).
You can try suing Global-Compu-Mega-Corp, because of course the laws are on the books — but in practice, you'd better have somebody saying on videotape that they're firing you because you're black/gay/old/fat/whatever — and you're far from guaranteed to win even then.

BaldarTFlagass September 17, 2012 at 9:40 am

It's shit like this that made Janis Joplin leave Beaumont.

Dashboard Buddha September 17, 2012 at 9:47 am

Johnny and Edgar Winter too.

BaldarTFlagass September 17, 2012 at 9:50 am

Can you imagine? "Sorry, you're too white."

Texan_Bulldog September 17, 2012 at 9:40 am

Black & gay in Tejas. Throw him in a wheel chair & he'd be the least lucky guy…ever.

eggsacklywright September 17, 2012 at 9:51 am

At least he's not a muslin.

Steverino247 September 17, 2012 at 10:12 am

Or an atheist…

BaldarTFlagass September 17, 2012 at 10:18 am

That you know of….

ThankYouJeebus September 17, 2012 at 9:41 am

Come on people. It's not because the kid's gay, it's because Kwmane sounds like Hussein.

Boojum September 17, 2012 at 10:29 am

Obviously Kenyan.

BaldarTFlagass September 17, 2012 at 9:42 am

"We had to destroy the class in order to save it."

Katydid September 17, 2012 at 9:54 am

hearts and minds people, hearts and minds.

no_gravity September 17, 2012 at 9:43 am

Is a cosmetology class without gays really a cosmetology class at all?

Boojum September 17, 2012 at 10:30 am

If a woman gets her hair and make up done, and there are no gays to appreciate it, is she still ugly?

UW8316154 September 17, 2012 at 9:44 am

That is totally fucking gay.

BaldarTFlagass September 17, 2012 at 9:46 am

It wasn't the gay thing so much as everyone's inability to pronounce the name "Kwmane." What, silent 'm'? Or maybe "Khomeini"?

prommie September 17, 2012 at 9:51 am

Izzat Mr. Dowd? Thats what I come here for, the culture, its like a culture club.

actor212 September 17, 2012 at 9:53 am

Ow.

Do you really want to hurt me?

prommie September 17, 2012 at 9:59 am

Some times, but mosta the time your alright.

HistoriCat September 17, 2012 at 12:19 pm

I recommend always doing the right thing – you don't want the Karma Chameleon to bite you in the ass.

prommie September 17, 2012 at 12:35 pm

Yeah, gotta watch out for that chameleon, it comes and goes.

Boojum September 17, 2012 at 10:58 am

I think, in this instance, they are closer to Staphyllococcus Aureus than to Boy George.

PsycWench September 17, 2012 at 9:52 am

This reminds me of Prince Edward county in Virginia that closed all the schools when ordered to integrate. The wealthier kids could go to private school. The rest had enough education to work as domestics which is probably all the county thought they needed.

tessiee September 17, 2012 at 12:30 pm

I had a former co-worker who was originally from Arkansas. In case you needed any more evidence that Walmart was evil, she said that when the Walmart in her town finally voted to unionize, the company shut the store down and moved away.

Monsieur_Grumpe September 17, 2012 at 9:52 am

Great going idiot! Who’s going to build all that big Texas hair now?

kittensdontlie September 17, 2012 at 10:12 am
Monsieur_Grumpe September 17, 2012 at 11:21 am

!!!!

PsycWench September 17, 2012 at 9:53 am

So Texans were mystified by the idea of a gay man wanting to work in a beauty industry? Don't they have TVs or anything? Can they not read?

SorosBot September 17, 2012 at 10:02 am

What will be next, gay men performing on Broadway?

PsycWench September 17, 2012 at 10:04 am

I am terrified that gay men could begin designing women's clothing.

UW8316154 September 17, 2012 at 10:13 am

Before you know it, they'll be wanting to become hair stylists.

starfanglednut September 17, 2012 at 10:41 am

And planning weddings!

MissTaken September 17, 2012 at 10:06 am

Can they not read?

Yes.

SorosBot September 17, 2012 at 10:09 am

As Rick Santorum admitted, they "will never have the elite, smart people on our side".

oenspiek September 17, 2012 at 10:35 am

You ca be pretty sure that Santorum, and his followers, view that as a mark of honour.

YasserArraFeck September 17, 2012 at 10:19 am

TV's fer football, readin's fer lib'ruls

Katydid September 17, 2012 at 9:53 am

…who also serves as a deacon at Antioch Missionary Baptist Church

quelle surprise

eggsacklywright September 17, 2012 at 9:54 am

I didn't think the folks in Beaumont were smart enough to be concerned about the origins of the universe.

Toomush_Infer September 17, 2012 at 9:55 am

There's got to be a better word than bigot for this level of homophobia….

freakishlywrong September 17, 2012 at 10:03 am

"self-loathing" and "closeted" come to mind.

randcoolcatdaddy September 17, 2012 at 9:55 am

Gays should flock to Antioch Missionary Baptist Church so they will shut it down.

comrad_darkness September 17, 2012 at 10:03 am

They already have flocked there. But they are issued an extra solid closet door upon being made deacon.

BaldarTFlagass September 17, 2012 at 9:57 am

Mr Amon was heard to tell Mr Gray to take his cosmetology class up the road in Jasper.

BigSkullF*ckingDog September 17, 2012 at 9:59 am

Are you kidding me with this shit? My hair has still not recovered from the untimely death of my gay hairdresser. God I miss him.

BaldarTFlagass September 17, 2012 at 10:02 am

Isn't "gay hairdresser" an oxymoron? Like "ATM Machine"?

Boojum September 17, 2012 at 10:33 am

I think you meant a redundancy. An oxymoron is when a Palin breathes.

Toomush_Infer September 17, 2012 at 11:09 am

breathes in (fixed)….

HistoriCat September 17, 2012 at 12:22 pm
Biff September 17, 2012 at 12:34 pm

And an oxymormon is when Mittens breathes?

BaldarTFlagass September 17, 2012 at 10:00 am

If Kwmane Gray had my sense of humor, he'd be showing up for services every Sunday at the the Antioch Missionary Baptist Church.

ttommyunger September 17, 2012 at 10:18 am

You can't be serious. We're talking about Texas. About the third Sunday Mr. Gray would be found tied to a fencepost by barb wire.

Boojum September 17, 2012 at 11:01 am

At first, I thought you were giving them credit for tolerance, what with the three Sundays, then I realized it was all about figgering out how knots work.

ttommyunger September 17, 2012 at 11:06 am

Terrorism is hard werk; and komplikated.Sent from the Field, not in Garrison.

comrad_darkness September 17, 2012 at 10:03 am

Wake me when we have separation of church and state.

UW8316154 September 17, 2012 at 10:04 am

THIS:
http://www.beaumont.k12.tx.us/careercenter/

Why is the "Best Kept Secret In Beaumont" highlighted in scorching flames??

CthuNHu September 17, 2012 at 10:46 am

That's one sweet cutting-edge website there. What, they couldn't afford a "Best viewed with Netscape Navigator 2.0" gif?

PubOption September 17, 2012 at 11:23 am

Because the gays have infected the website?

bobbert September 17, 2012 at 4:20 pm

Geez, look at the forearm on that cosmetologist.

BaldarTFlagass September 17, 2012 at 10:07 am

There were fistfights among the other students on who got to be Kwmane's lab partner; they all figured on the easy A.

Biff September 17, 2012 at 12:35 pm

Enough with the fisting, already!

MissTaken September 17, 2012 at 10:08 am

You can only take his mascara wand from his cold, gay, dead hands.

Hera Sent Me September 17, 2012 at 10:09 am

This is my hometown. I know the principal personally. My wife worked for him. Let's put it this way – at least gay male students were always safe around him. Straight female students not so much.

ThundercatHo September 17, 2012 at 10:39 am

Nice. Please keep us updated on how much his ass gets sued for (fingers crossed).

Hera Sent Me September 17, 2012 at 10:53 am

This isn't even close to being the most bizarre incident in the BISD in the past year. An assistant principal abruptly resigned after his affair with a school security guard became known. It became known because the guard's husband found pictures of the couple in flagrante on her phone. He printed up hundreds of copies of them and PUT THEM ON CARS parked in the school parking lot. At the same school, a teacher resigned after being caught naked in a student's bedroom closet by her mother. The school's electrical contractor had his multimillion dollar contract renewed by the district AFTER he pleaded guilty to stealing over $3 million from it. The district paid some organization to name it a "top ten" district nationally, and then put up signs all over town proclaiming the great honor.

If anybody out there wants to do a Ph.D about the intersection of politics, sex, race and money in an American town, this would be the town to study. Ditto for somebody wanting to write a novel about a place that makes Yoknapatawpha County seem quiet and quaint.

Boojum September 17, 2012 at 11:03 am

Holy fuck. I wish I was licensed to practice in Texas. This would be so much FUN!

Limeylizzie September 17, 2012 at 1:43 pm

Ob/Gyn or lawyer?

bobbert September 17, 2012 at 4:22 pm

The teacher's mother, or the student's mother? Just curious.

oenspiek September 17, 2012 at 12:12 pm

"Let's put it this way – at least gay male students were always safe around him. Straight female students not so much."

So, he's a RINO, then?

102415 September 17, 2012 at 3:05 pm

Excellence in commenting. Thank you for your service.

Chow Yun Flat September 17, 2012 at 10:10 am

The theater classes at Beaumont Independent School District must be extremely dull.

Negropolis September 18, 2012 at 2:15 am

The jazz-hands must be down-right anemic.

BigSkullF*ckingDog September 17, 2012 at 10:13 am

Wait till they discover that lesbo in the autoshop.

chicken_thief September 17, 2012 at 10:59 am

I thought lesbians weren't very good with tools.

Toomush_Infer September 17, 2012 at 11:11 am

WHATTT????

Biff September 17, 2012 at 12:38 pm

They're all about those Snap-On tools, ain't they?

OneYieldRegular September 17, 2012 at 10:15 am

Ah, so the secret of that teased up, tossed up, Texas big hair has just been revealed.

ShreditorsDesk September 17, 2012 at 10:17 am

That principal needs to wake up with a new hairdo.

102415 September 17, 2012 at 3:02 pm

Maybe Mitt can help.

ttommyunger September 17, 2012 at 10:21 am

Proving the Biblical Justification for his stance, the good Principal/Deacon posted a full account of Jesus' denunciations of teh gheys as follows:

Boojum September 17, 2012 at 11:04 am

At least it was a wide stance.

ttommyunger September 17, 2012 at 11:10 am

Wider than the vast expansion of space. Even the space between the Good Deacon's ears.Sent from the Field, not in Garrison.

CthuNHu September 17, 2012 at 10:23 am

I think we're overlooking the upside here, which is that there is one less fanatical madrasa brainwashing uneducated rubes with their bizarre Texan makeup cult.

Also, Amons' lipstick found around local truckstop glory hole in 3… 2… 1…

1stNewtontheMoon September 17, 2012 at 10:28 am

In fairness, Principal Anus prayed like a motherfucker before he fired the teacher who wouldn't do his bidding. God (in the voice of 3rd grade educated pastor) told him to do it. God spoke. He listened. Case closed.

chicken_thief September 17, 2012 at 11:02 am

Principal Anus, if God really spoke to him, clearly doesn't understand Jeebus's snark.

TheGyrus September 17, 2012 at 10:30 am

Good thing Beaumont Independent School District has a strong teacher's union to protect the job of someone like Cequada Clark.

Wait, what? Its non-union? Who would have thought…

mayor_quimby September 17, 2012 at 10:33 am

Folks, come on, let's concentrate on the real news of the day – Butterstick 2 has been born, and the Washington Post wants to know what to name him/her http://goo.gl/oazZ8
The comments are open.

James Michael Curley September 17, 2012 at 10:51 am

I think this is where I came into this movie. Do I have to buy another ticket?

mayor_quimby September 17, 2012 at 2:29 pm

Haha, you thought this shit ended? It's just one big circle-jerk until we all go to the big Chinese Nature Preserve/Factory Farm in the sky.

Serolf_Divad September 17, 2012 at 10:40 am

Danged gays demanding their "special rights" (i.e. the right to take a cosmetology class) wind up ruining it for everybody else.

An_Outhouse September 17, 2012 at 10:43 am

Couldn't find a happy story for Mondat morning? Thnx a lot.

DahBoner September 17, 2012 at 10:46 am

Have the good people of Texas thought about shutting down Nieman Marcus, becuse ghey…?

PubOption September 17, 2012 at 10:55 am

They should try to close the airports, that way they could get rid of the gay flight attendants and the Islamic taxi drivers.

Arkoday September 17, 2012 at 10:57 am

Why does the very thought of a preacher / principal give me the runs? Bible-thumper asshole…

Boojum September 17, 2012 at 11:06 am

Maybe it's because you mean asshole-thumping Bibler.

Dumbedup September 17, 2012 at 10:59 am

humans have a boundless capacity for both love and hate. When you fill your life with hate you experience hell. When you learn that there is no limit to the love you can give and receive in this life, you are as close to heaven as you will ever be. These tormented, hateful souls on the right are suffering. The only response is to spread love to every person you can, love and human kindness. It changes the world. (OK more snark, I know, but this hateful discrimination is serious)

Boojum September 17, 2012 at 11:07 am

Wait, Hell is hating these hateful fucks? I knew I'd like it better here!

valthemus September 17, 2012 at 11:01 am

This unholy persecution of good Christians by gay people walking around an' taking classes an' doing stuff must end now!

Boojum September 17, 2012 at 11:08 am

Principal Anus could feel the sinful gay powers overcoming his Holy resistance to the evil allure of some sweet, sweet cocksucking.

Beowoof September 17, 2012 at 11:26 am

Don't worry I am sure Principal Anus would swallow the evidence of the deed.

ericcbraun September 17, 2012 at 11:06 am

The good-ish news is the school district decided to continue the program, though the teacher is still out of a job and no word on whether or not the student is back in the program. http://www.beaumontenterprise.com/default/article

barto September 17, 2012 at 11:17 am

Just guessin, but there were probably a few laser-beams in that class, donchathink Deacon Amons? Oh, but that's HOT, amirite?

a_pink_poodle September 17, 2012 at 11:23 am

I enjoy stories about people who screw over everyone else to spite one person. It makes me feel better as a person!

tessiee September 17, 2012 at 12:32 pm

So, are they all going to go to Chick-Fil-A to get their hair done, or what?

owhatever September 17, 2012 at 1:22 pm

We Texans will not be teaching cosmology to any homosexuals, for they would then tinker with God's universe.

Nostrildamus September 17, 2012 at 1:54 pm

I always wondered what Mitt looked like under that rubber mask he's always wearing.

Naked_Bunny September 17, 2012 at 1:59 pm

See how much better America is when you let the fundies take charge?

RufusTFirefly September 17, 2012 at 2:25 pm

Worst King of the Hill episode ever.

Baba_NinjaCat12 September 17, 2012 at 4:34 pm

A great way to end Big Texas Politicians stupidity, just elect and send in alot of gays. That will shut the state legislative faster than old west quick gunslinger able to draw his gun out in a shoot-out. Yea Haw.

Pennywhistler September 17, 2012 at 7:11 pm

I'm OK with riff. It's those damned raff that ruin it for all of us.

Redgyal September 17, 2012 at 9:09 pm

Wait. Is that why you won't do the Wonkette event in Texas?

Negropolis September 18, 2012 at 2:02 am

As soon as I saw "Beaumont", "Southeast Texas", and "Missionary Baptist" it all made sense. Southeast Texas is basically West Louisiana, and Beaumont is the armpit.

I guess this was a legitimate gay, because the course shut itself down just for him.

Negropolis September 18, 2012 at 2:20 am

What the hell does this Kwmane think he is? A person?

No snark, when I see the formerly oppressed turning around and doing the oppressing, it hurts my heart. For these types of people to not see the irony is just amazing.

UW8316154 September 17, 2012 at 10:09 am

Winner

Boojum September 17, 2012 at 2:50 pm

Lawyer. I don't think I'd want to be the local 'bortion doc.

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