if we can make it there

New York City, It Is Time To Get Your Drinky Thing War On

#warblogHaven’t you been patient, NYC? (No, you have not.) Well it is FINALLY your turn for a Wonkette Drinky Thing (the last — and best? — of our East Coast world Tour), if you can wait until tomorrow (Thursday) night. Time and location, where it says “read more”!

Having WARRED on the Philadelphia Drinking Liberally, we have decided it is time to annex the Sudetenland the NYC Drinking Liberally. We have not told them this, so as to better have guerrilla sneak attacks on our side.

We will arrive at Rudy’s Bar, at 627 9th Avenue, near 44th St., at 7 p.m. on Thursday. It is cash-only, so your Editrix will have a limited number of Benjies with which to buy you pitchers, as is her habit.

Be there or be a fucking idiot.

You may donate if you so choose.





About the author

Rebecca is the editor and publisher of Wonkette. She is the author of Commie Girl in the O.C., a collection of her OC Weekly columns, and the former editor of LA CityBeat. Go visit her Commie Girl Collective, and follow her on the Twitter!

View all articles by Rebecca Schoenkopf
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Comments

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  • BaldarTFlagass

    I'll donate, alright. In person. To the Austin meetup.
    Yes, I'm a selfish fuck.

    • fartknocker

      And we should host the function at The Tavern, 12th Street @ N. Lamar. Excellent air conditioning, pub grub, and Shiner Bach on tap. To repeat myself, Fartknocker is purchasing the first and last round.

      • BaldarTFlagass

        I can fade that. Though I like the Bock in bottles better, unless they really stay on top of keeping the tap lines clean, which most places don't.

        • Boojum

          You have an Austin Drinky Thing, with lots of notice, I'm in from Atlanta. I'll even contribute.

          Never been to Austin.

      • iTuna

        Set that up anyway! I'd show up, were it to occur on a weekend.

        • BaldarTFlagass

          Yeah, weekend's pretty much a must for me, too, since it's a 75-90 minute drive and I get up at 430 am for work during the week.

          • iTuna

            Hell, I only need to be up at 7 to make it to work on time, but no way I try making it back to Waco the night of a Wonkette party.

          • BaldarTFlagass

            Great, now we just need to get Fartknocker to set a date. Because I don't know if we're going to get a visit from the coast.

          • iTuna

            Yeah, and I'm not sure how having Shiner on tap makes a difference. Every self-respecting bar in the state has Shiner (which, truthfully, is better bottled). I'd suggest either the Ginger Man or Easy Tiger, although Easy Tiger is, unfortunately, on 6th Street.

          • glasspusher

            Goddamn. When do you go to sleep? I had a 90 minute commute for 1.5 years and the getting up at 530 thing pretty much mentally disabled me. I got some of it back though- I no longer have to wear the bib.

        • MosesInvests

          Weekday is better for me, but Saturday night would be OK. Friday-no go.

      • MosesInvests

        Fireman's Four, please! Or Brewhouse Brown if it's cold out.

    • http://www.wonkette.com Lionel[redacted]Esq

      Ayn Rand would approve.

    • fartknocker

      So should we just go rogue and set up a Texas drinky thing in Austin and invite all our friends? Being nice people the Editorix and her crew are invited.

      • Boojum

        Yes. Your friends AND your fellow Wonketeers.

      • emmelemm

        We had a rogue Seattle drinky thing, and it was aces.

  • Schmannnity

    No Big Gulp drinks!

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      That's only for sugary drinks, like Mai Tais … but you can just get two 32-oz drinks.

      • Juan_Oriley

        Mai Tais are $4 tonight at Tucans in Palm Springs. I'll be the one straight guy with the ginger and Mexican gays outside if any one cares to join us. That's not A bad price for a drink around here.

  • SexySmurf

    I'm offended you're holding it so close to Ground Zero.

    • http://www.wonkette.com Lionel[redacted]Esq

      And serve alcohol, so everyone is offended. If only there were some strippers there to celebrate real America!

      • mrpuma2u

        Those poles represent the uh, pillars of democracy, yeah that's it. They aren't strippers they are small exotic business entrepreneurs.

        • chicken_thief

          That college tuition ain't gonna pay for itself.

      • http://dismalpseudoscientist.wordpress.com Incitefully_Joe

        Private Eyes is three blocks away. Or is that New York Dolls? I forget which one is right near Broadway, and which one is the 9/11 Strip Club.

        • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

          Private Eyes

          Or, uh, so I hear

    • kittensdontlie

      I do worry the W-revelers might be drawn to the 9/11 spotlights, like moths to a flame, and follow the waterfalls into the reflecting ponds,…not a desirable outcome.

  • BaldarTFlagass

    "we have decided it is time to annex the NYC Drinking Liberally."

    So, Wonkette is kinda like a cuckoo bird, laying its eggs in another bird's nest? I'm sure there's someone out there who knows a lot more about this kind of behaviour than I do.

    • delaney_blom

      Avian interspecifc brood parasitism is the term for the behavior. I wrote a paper about it in college.

      Many brood parasites' eggs hatch sooner than those of the host species, and some hatchlings have beaks shaped like scoops which makes it easier for them to throw the unhatched host eggs out of the nest.

      So, if the wonketteers show up early with 2 x 4s with nails in them (or something like that) and scare off all the NYCDL pussies, then yes, just like cuckoo birds.

      • Boojum

        Well, that sounds typical, so alrighty then!

  • Barbara_

    I want to be with Lizzie.

    • http://www.wonkette.com Lionel[redacted]Esq

      I would like to see video of that…., oh, wait, you just meant meeting her.

      • Jus_Wonderin

        I watch that video too, though.

    • fartknocker

      I want to be with you and Lizzie. I sense my abdominal muscles would be sore from laughter.

      • BaldarTFlagass

        Lizzie and Barb
        They wear them cut off britches
        And those skinny little halters
        And they're second cousins to me
        Man I don't care I want to get between 'em
        With a great big ol' hard on
        Like an old Bois D'arc fence post
        You could hang a pipe rail gate from
        Do some sister twisters
        'Til the cows come home
        And we'd be havin' us a time

        • Biff

          James McMurtry, one of my favorite Texans.

          • BaldarTFlagass

            Yowza!

      • Barbara_

        That's sweet, thanks.

        • Limeylizzie

          Hi Baby! I am very, very jet-lagged and our Editrix is showing up at 7 ish, I am so glad the drinky is Thursday as I thought it was tonight and I was nearly crying because I am so tired. We will SKYPE you, let us know when is a good time. I think we may be ordering pizza tonight!

          • Barbara_

            Lizzie, my love! I will be home tomorrow night and we can SKYPE in our jammies.

            Sent you a crazy email. Some brave bitch swiped my cash out ticket tonight in the casino. She ran to the other side of the casino and stuck my ticket in a machine, thinking it would erase the fact that it was tied to my player's club card and the 2,000 security cameras that watch every movement in the casino. She surrendered it quickly when security showed up. Security made me give her the $9.00 she earned playing with my money, LOL.

            I will check out of the hotel in Vegas and then I will be in Tucson for a while, shouting, "Thanks a lot for Sarah Palin, John McCain!" and then I will be home around 7-ish PM. Call me and send me cell phone pictures. Love ya!

    • Boojum

      I am biting my tongue.

  • Jus_Wonderin

    I'd really like to know how these go. Sure I am unbelieveably erudite and witty (gag) at the keyboard, but shy in person. Will someone hold my hand?

    Remember Dallas. And Baldar, if there is an Austin thingy, I'll drive down.

  • Schmannnity

    Wonkette as pub crawl.

  • RemyLeHeaux

    Thanks for all the notice!!!!

    • SnarkOff

      Right? It's Fashion Week, dammit!

  • http://www.wonkette.com Lionel[redacted]Esq

    You should have held it in Newark. Everyone knows all the happening things take place in Newark.

    • SexySmurf

      They'd have to get another "donate" button just to pay for the tolls.

    • BaldarTFlagass

      Maybe that cool mayor dude would come by.

  • nedbeaumontjr

    Rudy's, eh? Pat the big fiberglass pig on the head for luck.

  • CrunchyKnee

    Cash only? Sounds kinda commie.

    • Jus_Wonderin

      What no bartering?

      • Limeylizzie

        Depends what's being bartered.

        • Jus_Wonderin

          I'd run with this, but you could comment me up and down the east coast and Mr. Lizzie would beat me up so I will simply say…uh, uh, whatever you want Mistress???

          I do wish I could be there. With notice I could have been.

          • Limeylizzie

            Damn.MrLL is in LA…

          • commiegirl99

            I HAVE BEEN SAYING WE WOULD HAVE ONE FOR SIX WEEKS. INCLUDING THE DATE. JUST NOT THE PLACE. STOP BITCHING.

          • Jus_Wonderin

            Use that riding crop more, I like that.

    • http://www.wonkette.com Lionel[redacted]Esq

      They should demand gold or nothing.

    • http://dismalpseudoscientist.wordpress.com Incitefully_Joe

      Even moreso when you realize that the common practice at this spot is to buy pitchers when ever you think it's your turn to do so.

      Beer socialism, inotherwords.

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        To each according to his thirst.

        • Boojum

          That sounds awfully familiar….I read something like it recently….

  • Baconzgood

    An east coast drinky thing and no Pittsburgh? Baconz thinks you have "The Fear" of our ability to pound the booze.

    • 102415

      Hey, shouldn't you be getting in line to vote in November about now?

      • commiegirl99

        Hey I know you!

        • 102415

          *kiss* *kiss* ;)

  • Isner_Mahut

    Woo! Rudy's! Promise not to tell Justin you're crashing…

    • http://dismalpseudoscientist.wordpress.com Incitefully_Joe

      He… might already be aware, actually >_> <_<

      • Isner_Mahut

        You mean things on the internets aren't secret? Shit, gotta go delete my adultfriendfinder profile. BRB.

    • 102415

      Hey Justin! We're coming!

  • Oblios_Cap

    I didn't know Guliani owned a bar.

  • proudgrampa

    So can I start soliciting for "proudgrampa's Drinky Funtime"? Please send your donations (cash preferred).

    For each donation, I will personally prepare and imbibe one Sapphire martini (olives or onions? — please specify with donation) in your honor.

    Love,

    proud "Every drink I have, I have for you" grampa

  • IncenseDebate

    I may show. Not sure I want to reveal that I associate with the likes of you.

    • Oblios_Cap

      You obviously wouldn't be a member of a club that would have you as a member.

    • 102415

      Just put a bag over your head.

      • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

        *sigh*

        Just like my last date

        *sigh*

  • Lucidamente1

    I have to be out of town tomorrow, and so I has a very big sad. My liver, on the other hand, is calling off its letter-writing campaign to Amnesty International.

  • Beowoof

    From the picture I would think I would be bringing a 12 pack to Central Park.

  • CarbonDating

    Free hot dogs at Rudy's! Maybe we can has some sort of contest ?

  • UnholyMoses

    When is the meetup thingy in Kansas City?

    Anyone?

    Bueller… ?

    • BaldarTFlagass

      Do you mean Kansas City, Kansas, or Kansas City, Missouri?

      • UnholyMoses

        Lulz

        FTR: KCKS is a craphole, aside from the Legends area (where the racetrack, Livestrong Park, and other stuff is). Well, so is KCMO, but there are more not-all-that-crapholly areas.

      • SnarkOff

        Either way they've got a crazy way of lovin' there.

  • Guppy

    More Editrix baby pics?

  • magic_titty

    Will Newell be there? I'd like him to sign my copy of Ken Layne's Dignity?

    • BaldarTFlagass

      Maybe you can get Rebeki-beki-beki-schoen to sign it.

      • glasspusher

        Win

    • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/2012/06/introducing-bad-note-millstones-of-jazz.html Chet Kincaid_

      "What is your name? No, that's not it."

  • Antispandex

    This is really taking it easy, sucking up to the far northeast librul establishment types! What about the folks fighting for democracy out here in kinda the middle-western-northy section of the country? People in hell needs love also!

    • Dr_Zoidberg

      Yeah! What about Wyoming, huh? Imagine the fun we could have, dodging the rocks thrown our way thanks to all our librul gear.

  • Genio1

    So happy the East coast got a tour. Now come visit us in the wild, wild (libtard) west. Davis, Cali-fragi-socialistic, maybe? There's plenty of lovely, dreary, college kid crowded dinky dives in our UCD hamlet 20 minutes west of Sac..holla

  • gullywompr

    Gonna take a long time to hit all 57 states…

    • Boojum

      If you're seeing double, it's 114. In the shade.

  • pdiddycornchips

    Why on Thursday night Becca? I have to be in Newark, DE all day but if the festivities are still ongoing around 11, I'll be there to soak up your benji's and/or post bail for my fellow wonkette-sters.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      Stop in Trenton and pick up Prommie!

    • http://www.wonkette.com Pres.Beeblebrox

      Stop by Wilmington and pick me up!

  • RRoccoco

    That's within stumbling distance of my homestead! But to hell with patience–I started drinky thingying with Philly, and I'm not stopping until the Editrix in Chief is taking more of those sideways pics with her iPhone.

  • DahBoner

    //whistles

    New York Fucking City.
    http://www.google.com/search?tbm=isch&source=

    The Friendliest People In The World.

    Why else would so many people want to live so close together?

    • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

      The official T-shirt is:

      WELCOME TO NEW YORK! LEAVE YOUR MONEY AND GET OUT!

  • James Michael Curley

    Well, last Saturday I learned from my Eye Doctor I absolutely need now a procedure which will stave off having the lenses in my eyes go all cold souffle on me. Doctor did the first eye on Monday and upon further examination scheduled the second for Thursday. Since he told his front office he was canceling his day off to do it I got pretty convinced his urgency was not motivated by the lousy enumeration offered by the Aetna.

    So every time a Wonkette takes a drink an old fart will see another babe on this beach.

    • 102415

      We will dear James. We will.

    • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

      Buddy, I'll make sure fucking Baywatch shows up.

      • James Michael Curley

        Thanks, I just got back and the prognosis is good but when I asked the Doctor “Can I go hang out with a hedonistic cabal of shut ins who only come out at night to pickle their livers?” He said “Thanksgiving is in November, but wait until the weekend.”

  • sullivanst

    OT but speaking of war…

    I see Rand Paul thinks the US government reclaiming property that was stolen from it in '39 is just like the Nazis confiscating artwork from Jews.

    I suspect the Jewish families who decades later used the same principle our government applied to reclaim those paintings might have a different viewpoint.

    • MosesInvests

      Godwin, Schmodwin.

      • sullivanst

        A mind is a terrible thing to waste. Good thing Rand never had one.

        • NorthStarSpanx

          Hey Rand, this is awesome Senatorial line of thinking for many of the American Indian Tribes that think they still have a shot at getting their lands back from the likes of you.

  • qwerty42

    These drinky-thing meetups have sounded pretty good.

    • NorthStarSpanx

      I want to go to there.

      • commiegirl99

        And so you did.

  • FraAnima

    BYO AK-47!

    • glasspusher

      Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms. Three great things that go great together.

  • BklynE

    Ding dangit! I'll be a' poll-watchin' at tomorrow's NYC Primary. Donation forthcoming for someone to drink in my place as I prepare exhibits for future voter suppression lawsuits against the Board of Elections (can you tell I live in Bay Ridge?)…

    • glasspusher

      Pole smoking? Pole dancing?

  • jackoapostrophe

    OKAY, SO:

    i read wonkette all day every day but never comment and don't know anyone but this is happening 12 blocks from my work in NYC, should i come to it? my destiny, it is in your hands.

    • gullywompr

      Yes.

    • bobbert

      As a survivor of the SF Drinkup, I advise you that your attendance is mandatory.

      We had quite a few non-commenters, and they were just as fun and interesting as anybody.

      (Disclaimer — my enthusiasm for these meetups is quite high. I drove 150 miles to the one in SF).

    • emmelemm

      Yes. I am a reticent person in general, but the (unofficial) Seattle drinky was SO. MUCH. FUN.

      You will not regret it.

    • 102415

      Double yes. Please come.

      • jackoapostrophe

        What happens when I get there and dont know anyone? Are name tags involved? There's not enough Wellbutrin in the world to make this easy for me.

    • 102415

      Well, just stare at everyone and randomly mutter "Wonkette?" No will notice unless they wanted to punch someone all day or one of us decides to save you.
      Hey, it's Rudy's, the hot dogs are free the beer is cheap. You'll find us. And if you don't you won't care!

      • NorthStarSpanx

        Come. The silent majority is always welcome.

    • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

      Absolutely!

      You'll make friends and then you'll find yourself commenting and next thing you know, your IT department will submit a report to your boss and you'll be out of work like the rest of us!

  • viennawoods13
  • ttommyunger

    Looks like I picked the wrong decade to quit drinking.

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/mrblifil mrblifil

    What, no dinner and a show? I would have to come from Bklyn. I only wish 44th and 9th was like it used to be, then it would have been a truly worthy spot for Wonketts. I'll just go ahead and bring a few trannies anyway.

  • rocktonsam

    would it kill anybody to bring a camera that doesn't takes sideways pictures and show boobs also?

    • glasspusher

      This.

  • 415buzzard

    My New York sister is coming! She doesn't comment here but she is a devoted Wonkette follower. Bring your single male friends please.

    • Limeylizzie

      Is that Jessica?

      • 415buzzard

        No, she is a Katherine and I'm still waiting for her to call and tell me about it ( if she actually showed up!) Can't find her in the photos posted, but there is a nice one of you!

        • Limeylizzie

          Is she short with reddish hair and glasses?

          • 415buzzard

            Short, thin with almost black short hair, no glasses. Looks like a "New York Art Lady" / fashionista type.

          • Limeylizzie

            I don't remember her, but I was insanely jet-lagged.

  • 102415

    Boobs. They will be there.

  • SaintNixon

    Watch out, Big Apple. Lady Editor smells good…real good.

  • Jack Stuef

    Hello Wonketteers! My liver will be attending this.

    • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/2012/06/introducing-bad-note-millstones-of-jazz.html Chet Kincaid_

      They will notice, as soon as they sober up.

      • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

        Say what now?

  • guangho

    If I had a job, which I don't (of course!), I'd say I'll join you after work.