KATHLEEN SEBELIUS WANTS YOU PREGNANT  8:53 pm September 4, 2012

DNC Night 1: From Abortion To Zabortion, Everything You Want And Need

by Jesse Taylor

chelly chelleWelcome, Wonketeers! This is night one of the Democratic National Convention, where principled leaders get together to discuss a bold future for liberali…liber…

HAHAHAHAHAHA they’re totally going to pander for independent voters and toss out red meat, but everyone there is a vegan, so it’s dyed tofu.

Naturally dyed tofu, none of that Red-5. Monster.
9:03 PM – TED STRICKLAND IS GIVING A LITERAL SHOUTOUT TO ALL OF OHIO. (Disclaimer: he is my former boss and I love him.)

9:06 PM – Someone apparently showed Ted the Urban Dictionary definition of “HAM”. And he then said, “I would like to go that.”

9:08 PM – Kathleen Sebelius is out, I wonder when she’s going to burn a crucifix, hm?

9:10 PM – “Nixoncare”? Damn, Richard Nixon is ghost-taping her dad right now.

9:11 PM – Insurance companies can no longer discriminate against women, but they probably can against men, now, certainly. #WarOnMen

9:13 PM – It would have been great if someone had explained all of this to the American public sometime between 2009 and RIGHT NOW.

9:14 PM – I know you’re bored as hell right now, but this is electric for Kathleen Sebelius.

9:16 PM – Rahm Emanuel on to “Wanna Be Startin’ Somethin’”, and I hope that somethin’ is an unnecessary fight with a fast-food chain.

9:17 PM – We can rest easy – if there were easy solutions, Rahm would have found them!

9:22 PM – MC Hammer is at the DNC!!!

9:24 PM – I miss the RNC’s constant repetition of a single edited soundbite. All these different things being said are confusing and scary.

9:26 PM – Kumar’s on stage! I guess Obama let him out of Gitmo, then? CHANGE.

9:27 PM – Kal Penn makes an empty chair joke and just lost the lead in Million Dollar Baby 2: Billion Dollar Tween.

9:28 PM – Nobody better to tell me about how well Obama has done than a rich actor who left a show I really liked to go do something for Obama that I can’t really remember or define.

9:31 PM – Mark this as the first moment a Twitter hashtag was ever sardonically distributed via political convention. We are all heroes today.

9:33 PM – It is time for some token diversity as the Obamas bring out what I’m sure are hired family members.

9:37 PM – Barack Obama is talking about women eating bacon at home, which I’m entirely sure is sexist. Romney bounce?

9:39 PM – Lilly Ledbetter is onstage, and will be the only person with a Texas accent at this entire convention.

9:45 PM – If Barack Obama continues to intervene in every Supreme Court decision and naming laws after the losers, he will be President for Life!

9:49 PM – I am watching a convention where people are steadfastly supporting  marriage and government health insurance but hahaha it’s gay healthcare for everyone! Paul Ryan must feel lost.

9:52 PM – Not to bring policy into this, but Obamacare doesn’t actually cover everyone. It covers a lot of people! And a lot more than before! But not everyone.

9:57 PM – Deval Patrick pretends that the “I Have A Dream” speech was about more than Americans needing to avoid talking about or noticing race. FOR SHAME, BLACK MITT ROMNEY.

9:59 PM – Martin O’Malley kind of has a bootleg Michael Caine thing going on.

10:01 PM – Martin O’Malley should leave to Aaliyah’s “Back and Forth”. Just saying.

10:02 PM – O’Malley is so goddamn happy to be giving the message line over and over again.

10:07 PM – Tim Duncan’s mayor is on!

10:08 PM – Oh, wait, that wasn’t him, that was his…identical twin? Democrats couldn’t even find different-looking Hispanics for prime time???

10:11 PM – There should be a third Castro sibling, an evil anarchist Castro sibling. Also Julian > Joaquin.

10:12 PM – There’s so much aspiration and wishing at this thing. This convention needs more looming evil on the horizon.

10:14 PM – “We know you can’t be pro-business unless you’re pro-education.” A number of Southeast Asian factories would like to have a word with you.

10:18 PM – Castro pulled the funniest joke any Castro has pulled since Fidel convinced us he was still alive.

10:24 PM – This Julian Castro fellow will be on many of your television talky shows in the near future, I predict. Or his brother when he’s got the runs.

10:26 PM – So, an unknown guy comes out and gives a really quite great speech about his mother, using Spanish, supporting his nominee, and hey, what’s Chris Christie yelling at right now?

10:27 PM – EVERY PART OF ME THAT WANTS TO MAKE BABIES WANTS TO MAKE SURE THE BABIES ARE AS CUTE AS THAT LITTLE GIRL. Fuck, I’m 30 now.

10:30 PM – Michelle Obama intro video. Surprisingly devoid of her snatching donuts out of fat children’s hands.

10:33 PM – Can we vote for Michelle Obama for first lady as like a separate thing?

10:38 PM – This lady is voting for Michelle Obama just because Michelle wrote a letter back to her, but I get letters back from Sallie Mae all the time and I am not voting for her.

10:40 PM – Fact Check: some injured soldiers may not run marathons. (Submitted by Paul Ryan.)

10:42 PM – Michelle Obama talks about her daughters and how much she loves them. Fact check: she does love them.

10:43 PM – Michelle Obama talks about her and Barack being poor. Not Romney poor, where they lived in an apartment instead of a home, but like, actually poor.

10:45 PM – Michelle said, “Barack was brought up all the way across the country,” but you know she was going to say “the Kenya”. ALMOST, BIRTHERS!

10:48 PM – This speech is basically going right at everything Ann and Mitt said, but never once saying the word “Romney” or “rich-ass white folk”. Remarkable restraint.

10:51 PM – I am so bored by nobody talking about who actually built things. PICK IT UP, FITNESS LADY.

10:55 PM – Michelle Obama defends community organizing? Is there nothing she cannot do? Besides eat fried foods?

10:57 PM – I can’t believe all the class warfare that isn’t in this speech.

11:02 PM – Some might say Michelle Obama ran over, I say she made time stop.

11:04 PM – C-SPAN just did a series of shots of people trying to pretend they aren’t crying.

11:06 PM – And I’m out. I’m not going to remark on the fact that Michelle Obama gave a legitimately great speech that was a stirring embrace of American values and ideals, or that she is awesome. Must maintain cynicism. Look over there. LOOK OVER THERE NOW.

 

Hola wonkerados.

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{ 988 comments }

DrunkIrishman September 4, 2012 at 8:54 pm

Tammy Duckworth makes Chuck Norris look like a pussy.

Barbara_ September 4, 2012 at 8:57 pm

Did you see that shit from Chuck Norris, who said that if Barack Obama is reelected we will have "1,000 years of darkness."

"1,000 years of darkness" is the shade of "Just For Men" that Chuck rubs on his beard night and day.

vodkamuppet September 4, 2012 at 9:07 pm

Probably all over his balls too.

JustPixelz September 4, 2012 at 9:30 pm

Chuck Norris fapping to fifty shades of darkness. (Chuck Norris fapping — ugh!)

valgal2342 September 4, 2012 at 9:38 pm

http://youtube.com/watch?v=JLO1YIWQuXe
Bruce Lee kicking Chuck's ass.

Terry September 4, 2012 at 10:01 pm

Tammy Duckworth is real. Chuck is a craptastic cultivated image.

Barbara_ September 4, 2012 at 10:21 pm

I loved watching Tammy. She is just incredible.

Bezoar September 5, 2012 at 12:10 am

I wish I could vote for her, but I'm in Ohio. Maybe someday?

Steverino247 September 4, 2012 at 10:26 pm

Chuck Norris IS a pussy.

miss_grundy September 4, 2012 at 11:00 pm

Actually, Chuck Norris sounds like a pussy in that Republican movie, Expendables 2.

SigDeFlyinMonky September 5, 2012 at 10:41 am

Chuck Norris and the horse he rode in on.

rocktonsam September 4, 2012 at 8:56 pm

damn, Michelle is just awesome, really awesome.

ChessieNefercat September 4, 2012 at 11:22 pm

Many, many upfists for that. I love our wonderful FLOTUS.

actor212 September 5, 2012 at 8:41 am

Now, I not only want to marry FLOTUS but I want to cheat on her with her convention speech.

sullivanst September 5, 2012 at 9:00 am

You see, she's she's she's the fuckin' bomb.

BTW, did anyone else want to find Chuck Todd last night, replay his remark that "the Democrats are jealous of the Republicans' diversity" or whatever bullshit, and then beat him about his smug face with tonight's schedule?

actor212 September 5, 2012 at 9:21 am

Odd, you read my mind just an instant ago (ring up my Intense Debate profile)

In fairness, we completely ignored the Empty Chair demographic.

widestanceromance September 5, 2012 at 9:58 am

I would totes go straight for her.

C_R_Eature September 4, 2012 at 8:56 pm

Hey, a Liveblog! Finally! Since tonight is the Wonkette Drinky thing I was afraid all the Editors were: Too drunk to Blog

Went to a party
I danced all night
I drank 16 beers
And I started up a fight

But now I am jaded
You're out of luck
I'm rolling down the stairs
Too drunk to Blog

Too drunk to Blog
Too drunk to Blog
Too drunk, to Blog
I'm too drunk, too drunk, too drunk
To Blog

Monsieur_Grumpe September 4, 2012 at 9:18 pm

Probably will never see the Dead Kennedy’s playing at the DNC which is too bad.

C_R_Eature September 4, 2012 at 9:26 pm

Well, we did see one on video – but this is a crummy joke and I'm just not going to finish it.

Monsieur_Grumpe September 4, 2012 at 9:35 pm

Ha! I admire your restaint.

LesBontemps September 5, 2012 at 10:37 am

The DKs are no longer available, but Jello Biafra and The Guantanamo School of Medicine should have made it a stop on their tour: http://www.facebook.com/JBGSM

tessiee September 5, 2012 at 1:33 am

…take out your fuckin' retainer, put it in your purse!

memzilla September 4, 2012 at 8:56 pm

But it'll be Butterstick-grade pander (sorry).

Guppy September 4, 2012 at 9:42 pm

No you're not.

JackObin September 4, 2012 at 9:00 pm

I'd like to see Clint at the DNC talking to an empty chair apologizing to Bird for being a square.

ChillBill September 4, 2012 at 9:09 pm

Next time, he'll talk to a monkey. Oh, wait…

Terry September 4, 2012 at 10:04 pm

Clint's at home trying to figure out how to prevent his RNC debacle from screwing up the box office takings for his new movie.

miss_grundy September 4, 2012 at 11:04 pm

Yep, I get the feeling he may have to do a goodwill tour to get butts in the seats. Because his new movie is a lot like his old movies, in which he plays an angry old man that is still angry about something that happened in the past and it takes an entire movie for him to get over it and move on or die.

ChessieNefercat September 4, 2012 at 11:23 pm

Well then, never mind. Sorry, Clint.

sullivanst September 5, 2012 at 9:02 am

A lot like his old movies, and also his newer movies, then.

viennawoods13 September 4, 2012 at 11:28 pm

I talk to the chairs, but they don't listen to me….

Arborista September 5, 2012 at 12:12 am

I swear at mine sometimes but only when they move into my path…

tessiee September 5, 2012 at 1:34 am

"Dropping a coffee mug on the floor, I told it to go fuck itself." — Richard Price

Doktor Zoom September 5, 2012 at 9:11 am

Your experience is corroborated by Neil Diamond.

"I am," I said
To no one there
An no one heard at all
Not even the chair

Chairs: Bad listeners.

Tundra Grifter September 5, 2012 at 10:27 am

My favorite Charles Parker – "Romance Without Finance is a Nuisance:"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_BnFRd11sMk

There is also an excellent version with Dizzy.

Biff September 4, 2012 at 9:00 pm

Eat, sleep and jeep? The fuck?

StarsUponThars September 4, 2012 at 9:55 pm

I know, I know, but they played Chaka Kahn, Prince, and Annie Lennox with Aretha Franklin, so I'm willing to overlook it.

miss_grundy September 4, 2012 at 11:05 pm

The guy is working 60 hrs per week in the Chrysler plant, which would have closed if it weren't for Hopey…..

emmelemm September 4, 2012 at 9:00 pm

At the risk of exposing myself as a vegetarian-American, I will say that the "natural" alternative to Red Dye #5 is that cochineal dye made from beetles that Starbucks got in trouble for. So, not vegan-approved.

kittensdontlie September 4, 2012 at 9:09 pm

People…beetles are red meat too.

glasspusher September 4, 2012 at 9:14 pm

Republican- the other white meat

LibertyLover September 4, 2012 at 9:15 pm

Hmmm… too much gristle for my taste

glasspusher September 4, 2012 at 9:33 pm

and fat…

not that Dewey September 4, 2012 at 9:12 pm

And the dye is lovingly, euphemistically named "Carmine"

C_R_Eature September 4, 2012 at 9:40 pm

If you're caught misusing it you may get a Miranda warning.

Chow Yun Flat September 5, 2012 at 12:33 am

If that's really Carmen Miranda playing the cello he would have a fruit bowl on his head.

Arborista September 4, 2012 at 9:12 pm

Beets can dye things red…

finallyhappy September 4, 2012 at 9:13 pm

I like to go with your basic spray paint for my tofu

trampndirtdown September 5, 2012 at 12:16 am

Dyed my counter red the time I tried to make Borscht.

Terry September 4, 2012 at 10:05 pm

Beet juice, maybe?

HempDogbane September 4, 2012 at 10:18 pm

http://www.suntava.com/ Natural dye from red corn, bred by a guy who lives near me.

Lionel[redacted]Esq September 5, 2012 at 12:30 am

But then how do commie vegitarians eat?

emmelemm September 5, 2012 at 1:23 am

Communally?
Very carefully?

I don't know the answer!

Also, no one has made a VAG-atarian joke yet. I am disappoint.

Arborista September 5, 2012 at 1:51 am

How many vagetarians does it take to change a lightbulb?

emmelemm September 5, 2012 at 2:47 am

Fish?

deanbooth September 4, 2012 at 9:03 pm

Please, oh please, don't talk about reducing the (holy) deficit.

OurHoboSenator September 4, 2012 at 9:05 pm

Where the hell was this Ted Strickland in 2010?

Biff September 4, 2012 at 9:06 pm

Oh Ted Strickland, you had me until you started quoting scripture…

OurHoboSenator September 4, 2012 at 9:07 pm

He's a minister. Sorry.

Biff September 4, 2012 at 9:09 pm

I didn't know that! At least it was only that one time, and he didn't dwell…

finallyhappy September 4, 2012 at 9:09 pm

I'm Jewish but the Sell the reindeer and outsource the elves was great!

rickmaci September 4, 2012 at 11:53 pm

Why do the Republicons want to make war on Xmas?

tessiee September 5, 2012 at 1:35 am

Sell the reindeer?
Then how will Paul Ryan shoot Rudolph and pose for a picture?

Weallscream September 5, 2012 at 12:23 pm

With a bow and arrow, I suppose.

Arborista September 4, 2012 at 9:14 pm

It was a good quote for liberal atheists to go quote at religious non-liberals…

jqheywood September 5, 2012 at 8:24 am

I would have gone with Matthew 19:24 myself.

Tundra Grifter September 5, 2012 at 10:33 am

I think quoting the Bible was genius. It reminds all the evangelicals that (r)Money is a Mormon – did you notice how many "God Bless America's' there were last night?

This is payback for the past 6 years of "Obama is a Muslin." The chickens are coming home to roost.

Chet Kincaid_ September 4, 2012 at 9:07 pm

CNN just panned the crowd at the former Ohio Governor's speech. Hide the children, Peggy Sue, it looks like 95% Negroes there!!11!!

finallyhappy September 4, 2012 at 9:10 pm

I saw Arab-American signs and a woman with a hijab too. Also Tony Shaloub

vodkamuppet September 4, 2012 at 9:14 pm

PBS has been lingering on Shaloub all night and I can't figure out why. It's creepy.

Terry September 4, 2012 at 10:06 pm

Famous person they could identify. Arab-American best known for being nice.

tessiee September 5, 2012 at 1:36 am

Tony Shaloub may be nice, but I had an ex who was like Monk, so I can't watch the intro to that show without wanting to punch him.

Arborista September 4, 2012 at 10:01 pm

Thank you- I thought that was him, but I couldn't see his face- just that hairline…

ChessieNefercat September 4, 2012 at 11:24 pm

I liked the opportunidad sign.

SexySmurf September 4, 2012 at 9:16 pm

Do you think MSNBC will film the one white male in the crowd from different angles to make it look like there's more than one there?

Arborista September 4, 2012 at 9:16 pm

PBS is showing the white folks too- saw a white guy wearing a pink 'Biloxi' t-shirt & he looked like a fun dude.

SorosBot September 4, 2012 at 9:07 pm

It's good that the Dems are now willing to call lying Mitt Romney a liar, but if only the media would follow suit.

Willardbot9000_V2.5 September 5, 2012 at 2:21 am

You have to give the Bamz advisors and Bamz credit for not being unwilling to get their hands dirty. It's about time a Democrat learned things like framing the other candidate. I'm not that old but I do remember Bill Clinton being unwilling to trash Dole, and Gore and Kerry…the less said the better. Obama is the first Democrat willing to call Republicans what they are: lying sociopaths who don't give a shit about 99% of this country…I just hope he doesn't back down because this is a LONG time coming. Also, I love how Eastwood in a semi-lucid moment said Obama isn't nice while endorsing a guy who just makes up shit as he goes to play to the very lowest common denominator. I hope Obama hits Rombot in the face with a shovel…and we bury the fucker (with votes).

Incitefully_Joe September 4, 2012 at 9:07 pm

Was it just me, or was that "Obamacare saves a young child with a heart defect" story eleventy billion times more touching than Santorum's "we didn't retroactively abort our child even though she had weird hands" story?

Texan_Bulldog September 4, 2012 at 9:09 pm

I thought that too, she was terribly effective. Too bad she lives in AZ with all the crazies.

Blueb4sinrise September 4, 2012 at 9:14 pm

Hmph. Sez the Texan.

Texan_Bulldog September 4, 2012 at 9:21 pm

Ha ha…well, say what you will about Rick Perry (crazy, stupid, drunk, etc.), he doesn't hate on the brown people like Jan Brewer does.

Blueb4sinrise September 4, 2012 at 9:26 pm

You hate Wrinkle-americans!!!

sullivanst September 5, 2012 at 9:07 am

No, he just sends them for lethal injection.

C_R_Eature September 4, 2012 at 9:24 pm

Not just you. That story got right to me and that's no easy thing these days. She gave a powerful speech that was so effective because it was so obviously from the heart.
It was also a powerful blow at the R's "Government Bureaucrats taking over your healthcare". Like the unaccountable Insurance company Bureaucrats aren't worse.

Isyaignert September 5, 2012 at 2:13 am

Death by spreadsheet.

C_R_Eature September 5, 2012 at 5:33 am

That needs to be a bumper sticker:

OBAMACARE: the cure for Death by Spreadsheet.

Guppy September 4, 2012 at 9:46 pm

Romney administered to the dying; Obama worked to make sure they didn't die to begin with.

"Party of life" indeed.

Doktor Zoom September 5, 2012 at 2:51 am

"When I give food to the poor, they call me a saint. When I ask why they are poor, they call me a communist."

Dom Helder Camara

ChillBill September 4, 2012 at 9:07 pm

Is Michelle on yet?I might actually have to watch this thing.

Chet Kincaid_ September 4, 2012 at 9:08 pm

Ted Strickland, cooking up the steaks just as rare as you like!

rickmaci September 4, 2012 at 11:55 pm

Cooking up Republipork hindquarters steaks.

Negropolis September 5, 2012 at 12:01 am

There was blood when he left that stage, tonight…and none of it was his own.

Chet Kincaid_ September 4, 2012 at 9:08 pm

Finally, some white people in the audience!!1!

rickmaci September 4, 2012 at 11:55 pm

Jill and Joe?

vodkamuppet September 4, 2012 at 9:09 pm

Man PBS is fucking shit up royally tonight.

Arborista September 4, 2012 at 9:18 pm

Yeah, why no audio problems when the rightwing wackos were talking?

vodkamuppet September 4, 2012 at 9:24 pm

Heh, don't know, I didn't watch.

CthuNHu September 4, 2012 at 9:09 pm

McKayla is impressed by Michelle's McKayla impression.

Joshua Norton September 4, 2012 at 9:10 pm

I don't know about the polls, but my sanity is definitely getting a bump.

NellCote71 September 4, 2012 at 10:04 pm

Ain't that the truth. I feel like I can breathe again.

Lionel[redacted]Esq September 5, 2012 at 12:32 am

Is that a bump in your polls, or are you just happy to see me.

Lucidamente1 September 4, 2012 at 9:10 pm

Is it me, or is Kathleen Sebelius totally hot?

Limeylizzie September 4, 2012 at 9:12 pm

MrLL likes her as well.

BarackMyWorld September 4, 2012 at 9:13 pm

I hope you're referring to the temperature in the room she's in.

ProgressiveInga September 4, 2012 at 9:22 pm

It's you. She always looks pinched to me. But, hey, there's a lid for every pot, right? ✌

Willardbot9000_V2.5 September 5, 2012 at 2:32 am

Yeah she's a bit uh…seasoned for my taste but to each their own. She looks like maybe oh…25 years ago, how old is she? I think late 50's, early 60's? Anyway I've seen pics of Hellen Mirren in 1966 and she looked hot back then (not to mention Raquel Welch, the reason I support time machines…) so anything is possible, right? I do like me some buxom kiersten sinema…she's bi the way too…which is hot and an ex-Mormon so as anyone who grows up around Mormons knows, Mormon girls can be a lot like the legends of Catholic girls (I grew up in Utah so it's a legend to me).

Jus_Wonderin September 5, 2012 at 12:24 pm

NAATM > National Association for the Advancement of Time Machines. <Reminds me to pay my dues.

BarackMyWorld September 4, 2012 at 9:11 pm

Watching MSNBC…Ezra is a great writer and analyst, but he has a on-screen presence only slightly better than Tim Pawlenty.

Isyaignert September 5, 2012 at 2:15 am

Must agree. Also too, he talks too fast and in a strange cadence. Maybe it's just me.

Willardbot9000_V2.5 September 5, 2012 at 2:39 am

Yeah he is pretty boring…I always thought Chris Hayes is boring too. Tweety bird is funny when tanked, he gets all loud and confrontational (we need to get home and the blitzed Tangerine into a fight…) and of course Rachel is every guys nerdy lesbian dream. MSNBC needs to get like big, fat Ed Schultz to get all puffed up and yelling like when he was arguing with rat fuck fuck face Walker.

sudsmckenzie September 5, 2012 at 3:49 am

He is no good at the short stints, when you give him a full hour, filling in for Rachele, you find yourself saying Chris\Mellisa who?

sullivanst September 5, 2012 at 9:31 am

Oh, don't you go saying anything bad about MHP, you hear? You hear?

Negropolis September 5, 2012 at 7:03 am

I have a hard time stomaching his fence-straddling in writing; it comes through even more clear in audio. He's so careful in calculating how far he's gone one way or the other so he'll have a path back to the middle, that the conclusions he comes to aren't as sound and definitive as they otherwise could be.

I've always wanted to believe that what has bothered me about him is that he's just super meticulous that it goes under or over my radar. But, the more I see of him and read of his the more I feel it's a political calcuation to stay in the Beltway media's good graces. Maybe I'm judging him to harshly, but he's too timid on too many important issues for my tastes.

Chet Kincaid_ September 4, 2012 at 9:11 pm

CNN has a block of 3 middling actors talkin' about the Leadbelly Act!

finallyhappy September 4, 2012 at 9:17 pm

just saw a 2016 commercial on CNN- and it is a lie- I KNOW BARACK OBAMA!(well, not biblically)

BarackMyWorld September 4, 2012 at 9:23 pm

Who?

tessiee September 5, 2012 at 1:39 am

"the Leadbelly Act!"

Is that the law that requires all silly ass academic whitefolks to listen to old blues?

Limeylizzie September 4, 2012 at 9:12 pm

Did I miss Ted Strickland? Am watching MSNBC.

Chet Kincaid_ September 4, 2012 at 9:13 pm

Yes, I don't know why MSNBC is droning on up in the booth instead of being on the floor.

Limeylizzie September 4, 2012 at 9:18 pm

I just can't stand CNN.

Chet Kincaid_ September 4, 2012 at 9:20 pm

That's where the comedy is, though!

vodkamuppet September 4, 2012 at 9:19 pm

Because its all about them.

Lucidamente1 September 4, 2012 at 9:15 pm

C-SPAN ueber alles

Biff September 4, 2012 at 9:16 pm

Much better to get the convention on c-span, and commentary here.

ChessieNefercat September 4, 2012 at 11:27 pm

Yup. I learned a few years ago that C-Span, get this, actually puts the cameras on the people on stage, whereas all the news channels have teh cameras on each other, yammering about the people on stage.

poorgradstudent September 4, 2012 at 9:12 pm

I'm as excited as a Pakistani villager who thinks he's just heard drones overheard.

Monsieur_Grumpe September 4, 2012 at 9:19 pm

Without the pants shitting I hope!

poorgradstudent September 4, 2012 at 9:24 pm

…Hm, I'll have to check.

Willardbot9000_V2.5 September 5, 2012 at 2:50 am

hahaha silly Pakistani villager! A drone to a Muslin is a lot like a pyroclastic flow from a volcano…when you can hear it that means you have exactly one nanosecond before it kills you…the pants shitting is pretty much non-negotiable once you realize what it is, too….which makes it just like a pyroclastic flow…that sucks. Well, at least with a pyroclastic flows the survivors don't find bible quotes scrawled in the remains, so that's good right? I mean that would be totally fucked up…

Willardbot9000_V2.5 September 5, 2012 at 2:52 am

Did I mention how much the evangelism in the military pisses me off? I mean, why doesn't Obama just shitcan every single one of those right wing fucks and replace them with chaplains who aren't ya know, religious fascists…

Goonemeritus September 4, 2012 at 9:15 pm

When do we get around to calling Romney a foreigner?

LibrarianX September 4, 2012 at 9:39 pm

He's from Earth?

Veritas78 September 4, 2012 at 10:17 pm

We've already called his money foreign. Best line of the night (from Strickland):

His money needs a passport. Then some snark about his money skiing in the Alps and surfing in the Caymans. We need more of this.

BoatOfVelociraptors September 5, 2012 at 9:56 am

His money needs more passports than James Bond.

rickmaci September 4, 2012 at 11:58 pm

Greatgrandpa Polygamy Romotinez was a wetback.

MissNancyPriss September 4, 2012 at 9:15 pm

Why are the Democrat's sets THAT much better than the Repubs?

SexySmurf September 4, 2012 at 9:18 pm

Gay people?

Zango Crudmonger September 4, 2012 at 9:57 pm

Fabulous people.

TribecaMike September 4, 2012 at 10:36 pm

Some of my best gay friends are gay.

Boojum September 5, 2012 at 12:13 am

If I had sex with a man, could I learn to have some taste in clothes? Because, seriously, at this point….,

Pragmatist2 September 5, 2012 at 8:29 am

Fabulously gay people!

vodkamuppet September 4, 2012 at 9:21 pm

Because the GOP hasn't joined the 21st century yet.

miss_grundy September 4, 2012 at 11:15 pm

No, because all artsy fartsy people are Dems. And Hollywood liberals.

Geminisunmars September 4, 2012 at 11:50 pm

9 out of 10 creatively intelligent people are Dems. (Actually it is 10 out of 10, but we are a tolerant group, so sometimes we let a wanna-be into our midst, who finds him/herself unable to grasp basic progressive concepts.)

Bezoar September 5, 2012 at 12:34 am

Seriously, I think you're right; the Repubs seem to have no aesthetic sensibility. They wouldn't know beauty if it bit them on the ass.

shelwood46 September 5, 2012 at 2:15 am

I cannot imagine anyone getting through a BFA in Theatre, let alone an MFA, without coming out a Democrat on the other side. Government arts funding, the gays, enduring a summer theatre non-union internship (they will literally work you 19-24 hours a day for $10/week), then meeting the union techs who get decent pay and hours. Yeah, set designers are gonna skew Democrat.

An_Outhouse September 4, 2012 at 9:16 pm

sibelius is boring enough for a gop convention. must be because she's a 'kansas woman'. zzzzz

An_Outhouse September 4, 2012 at 9:16 pm

rahm!!!!

Lucidamente1 September 4, 2012 at 9:17 pm

Wait, I was fapping to Secretary Sebelius, and now they bring out Rahm. Ouch.

glasspusher September 4, 2012 at 9:17 pm

Don't fuck with The Hope.

gullywompr September 4, 2012 at 9:17 pm

Rahm! He was in line in front of me in a DC Starbucks not long ago. Man, those Chicago guys like their pinstripes wide.

emmelemm September 4, 2012 at 9:42 pm

As opposed to their stances?

tessiee September 5, 2012 at 1:43 am

"Chicago guys like their pinstripes wide."

At which point, they become chalk stripes:
http://www.gentlemansgazette.com/chalk-stripe-or-

Also, do you love that there's something called "Gentleman's Gazette"? Or does it make your monocle fall off?

gullywompr September 5, 2012 at 8:44 pm

I was not aware of the Chalk Stripe – must have been what he was wearing. And thanks for the Gentlemen's Gazette line, I shall peruse it forthwith.

Tundra Grifter September 5, 2012 at 10:36 am

Many years ago I read a fascinating little book "Letters from a Selfmade Merchant to his Son." He advises his offspring to invest in a good suit. "Don't buy a suit that makes people wonder if you perform buck and wing dancing or follow the horses for a living."

From a short distance the stripes should fade away – that's the difference between chalk and other stripes.

gullywompr September 5, 2012 at 8:44 pm

That's good advice. Wish I could afford them :(

Tundra Grifter September 6, 2012 at 1:46 pm

Please don't take this the wrong way. You don't have to buy it new – it's only going to be new the first time you wear it.

I recently purchased a nice Brooks Brothers (not top of the line, but still a great suit) three-piece tweed suit for less than $25 at our local Salvation Army.

Go to a thrift store in the wealthest neighborhood you can get to. Stores raising money for the ballet or symphony or art museum are the best.

We went on a cruise several years ago, and I needed a tux. Bought one that fit nicely for $30 or $40 at the symphony thrift store.

Tundra Grifter says Check. It. Out.

C_R_Eature September 4, 2012 at 9:18 pm

Argh, Tweety is on MSNBC now and I've got to switch to CSPAN before I break something

Hey! It's Rahmbo!

SorosBot September 4, 2012 at 9:18 pm

Rahm is looking very tan today.

Monsieur_Grumpe September 4, 2012 at 9:20 pm

Orange too! OMG his got the Boehners!

Arborista September 4, 2012 at 10:03 pm

He looks tan, but not orange on my teevee. It's an older set, though.

fuflans September 4, 2012 at 9:22 pm

is he wearing a towel?

johnnyzhivago September 4, 2012 at 9:19 pm

Did she say Obama was raised by Kenyan Women or Kansas Women?

finallyhappy September 4, 2012 at 9:23 pm

KANSAS

Chet Kincaid_ September 4, 2012 at 9:19 pm

If I may be provincial, Rahm just better hope the teachers don't go on strike.

An_Outhouse September 4, 2012 at 9:26 pm

mr. bubble popper.

miss_grundy September 4, 2012 at 11:19 pm

I receive Sun-Times email and on Saturday, the headline was that the teachers would be going on strike. Which is why Rahm is cutting his trip to Charlotte short.

Geminisunmars September 4, 2012 at 11:51 pm

So he needed to hurry home to break the Union?

Lucidamente1 September 4, 2012 at 9:21 pm

An oldie but goodie from Newell:
http://wonkette.com/413507/rahm-emanuel-will-real

fuflans September 4, 2012 at 9:26 pm

and did you see how freely we all flung around the r-word?

sigggghhhhhh.

the days of free speech.

Lucidamente1 September 4, 2012 at 9:30 pm

And we all skullfucked like crazy.

glasspusher September 4, 2012 at 9:35 pm

Buttsechs

fuflans September 4, 2012 at 9:22 pm

oh mayor rahm. i wish your vocal skills matched your temper.

Arborista September 5, 2012 at 12:21 am

They told him he couldn't swear. I think that's hampering the verbal output a bit?

Negropolis September 4, 2012 at 9:23 pm

Observations:

- Wow, Rahm is stepping all over his words.

- The Zoe story had everybody in the place in tears.

- The "USA! USA!" chant for Duckworth is probably one of the few times I've heard it where it seemed entirely appropriate.

- Despite Strickland not knowing how to modulate this voice, his quoting Matthew in the Gospel was really kind of on point, if only to show Republicans how this shit feels when they do it.

Monsieur_Grumpe September 4, 2012 at 9:27 pm

Zoe had me tearing up a little but in a very manly way.

BarackMyWorld September 4, 2012 at 9:29 pm

Same here, dude, same here…

An_Outhouse September 4, 2012 at 9:28 pm

you there?

Negropolis September 4, 2012 at 9:28 pm

No, just flipping between stations on TV.

finallyhappy September 4, 2012 at 9:28 pm

yeah, Tammy Duckworth's whole life story is incredible

finallyhappy September 4, 2012 at 9:23 pm

PBS showed part of Jesse Jackson

vodkamuppet September 4, 2012 at 9:25 pm

Needz moar swears.

Chet Kincaid_ September 4, 2012 at 9:26 pm

Haha, the mass crowd scenes look like the place is packed, and not quite ruly, like a real people community meeting.

Negropolis September 4, 2012 at 9:33 pm

Like one that might need a community organizer of sorts…

Obama 2012

FlownOver September 4, 2012 at 9:26 pm

Kumar! Stone the vote!

Chet Kincaid_ September 4, 2012 at 9:29 pm

I can't believe the wingnuts never went after Kumar for being a brown degenerate in the Administration. I guess Nobama took the pressure off him.

SorosBot September 4, 2012 at 9:26 pm

Hey didn't this guy kill himself last season?

FlownOver September 4, 2012 at 9:31 pm

True dat. I have the DVD

Biff September 4, 2012 at 10:08 pm

The series finale pretty much implied that everyone else was gonna die, too.

Negropolis September 4, 2012 at 9:26 pm

Partisanship aside, the convention just feels more lively and looks better produced even through television. The feeling in the center is palpable.

Monsieur_Grumpe September 4, 2012 at 9:28 pm

And the audience looks like America not some gated community

vodkamuppet September 4, 2012 at 9:32 pm

The seething resentment at the RNC bleeds right through the screen. I think liberals are just happier people.

NellCote71 September 4, 2012 at 10:09 pm

It has been that way forever. Demz are just congenitally cooler.

rickmaci September 4, 2012 at 11:59 pm

The delegates are sober.

Boojum September 5, 2012 at 12:16 am

That's just wrong.

fuflans September 4, 2012 at 9:26 pm

here comes our actor supporter.

Lucidamente1 September 4, 2012 at 9:27 pm

Kumar and Barack don't close Guantanamo

gullywompr September 4, 2012 at 9:27 pm

Kumar with the chair joke! Swoosh!

BarackMyWorld September 4, 2012 at 9:27 pm

KUMAR!!!!

actor212 September 5, 2012 at 9:44 am

KUTNER!

(some of us think his best work was on House)

Joshua Norton September 4, 2012 at 9:27 pm

Cue criticisms from the Republicans of the little girl, her mother and her family in 3, 2, 1…

Negropolis September 4, 2012 at 9:29 pm

"Let her die!"

"Bootstraps! Bootstraps!"

"Booooo!"

Arborista September 4, 2012 at 10:08 pm

Bootiestraps! Bootiestraps!

TribecaMike September 4, 2012 at 9:29 pm

321 BC or AD?

C_R_Eature September 4, 2012 at 9:30 pm

Michelle Malkin's taking photos through their kitchen windows as we speak.

OurHoboSenator September 4, 2012 at 9:34 pm

Granite countertop libel!

Monsieur_Grumpe September 4, 2012 at 9:33 pm

I had the same thought. Jeez that was a heart tugger.

JustPixelz September 5, 2012 at 8:44 am

They'll complain those parents are a little too pro-life. That the daughter is part of the culture of dependency what with depending on health insurance to stay alive. That they didn't pray enough at some point during the speech or their lives.

Doktor Zoom September 5, 2012 at 8:48 am

From the comments on Mediaite:

"Never mind that thousands (millions) of people are forced to buy medical insurance and the premiums for everyone else will skyrocket in order to pay for Obamacare. No, to Tommy and other liberals, all the sunshine and rainbows that Obamacare brings are completely free and no one has to pay for it.

"If you want to argue against it, you owe people like Zoe’s mom an answer."

Listen up Tommy and listen good. I don't owe her squat! I provide for MY family and that's ALL I'm responsible for. "

ProgressiveInga September 4, 2012 at 9:28 pm

Invisible Obama reference – Drink!

C_R_Eature September 4, 2012 at 9:29 pm

Kal's a pretty good speaker, when he gets going.

gullywompr September 4, 2012 at 9:30 pm

Yup.

Ms_Anthrope September 4, 2012 at 9:30 pm

I'm confused. Who built this fucking thing?

Lionel[redacted]Esq September 5, 2012 at 1:52 am

Rock and roll?

BarackMyWorld September 4, 2012 at 9:30 pm

HOLLYWOOD LIBRULS!!!!!

(Clint who?)

Negropolis September 4, 2012 at 9:30 pm

Okay, Kal is totally killing it.

finallyhappy September 4, 2012 at 9:31 pm

not on CNN or PBS!!!!

Negropolis September 4, 2012 at 9:32 pm

I'm a serial channel surfer when it comes to these conventions, so I don't miss a lot.

ProgressiveInga September 4, 2012 at 9:34 pm

Go ahead, go to CSPAN. You can do it!

C_R_Eature September 4, 2012 at 9:36 pm

CSPAN rawks. I get enough Talking Head blather as it is.

An_Outhouse September 4, 2012 at 9:38 pm

i love david byrne.

TribecaMike September 4, 2012 at 9:31 pm

Young women like pants jokes.

C_R_Eature September 4, 2012 at 9:31 pm

Hey! WE DON"T NEED PANTS!

Wonkette's way ahead of you Kal.

BarackMyWorld September 4, 2012 at 9:34 pm

Speaking of taking off my pants…here's Alex Wagner on MSNBC….

*drool*

NellCote71 September 4, 2012 at 10:10 pm

Yeah. She is just too purty by half.

MissTaken September 4, 2012 at 9:31 pm

Pants Off Dance Off!

gullywompr September 4, 2012 at 9:34 pm

Jam out with your clam out!

No? Too much? OK, that's where we'll draw the line, right there.

SorosBot September 4, 2012 at 9:40 pm

I'm-a watchin' you.

gullywompr September 4, 2012 at 9:44 pm

I always feel like somebody is…

BoatOfVelociraptors September 5, 2012 at 10:03 am

Into roller derby as well?

SorosBot September 4, 2012 at 9:39 pm

I have no pants on right now!

fuflans September 4, 2012 at 9:33 pm

well kumar made a shit load more sense than anything the republicans said.

Lucidamente1 September 4, 2012 at 9:33 pm

Brother and half sister of Michelle and Barack; republican heads exploding across the country.

TribecaMike September 4, 2012 at 9:35 pm

They were hoping half-brother George would be there. Jesus, internet trolls are in love with that guy. Well, not him personally.They couldn't care less about him as a human being.

vodkamuppet September 4, 2012 at 9:33 pm

Bammerz has a little sister? How did I not know that?

Negropolis September 4, 2012 at 9:35 pm

Maya. She campaigned for him quite a bit last time around.

vodkamuppet September 4, 2012 at 9:41 pm

Last time around was a LOT of vodka ago.

rickmaci September 5, 2012 at 12:02 am

Dr. Maya Kassandra Soetoro-Ng. The educational accomplishments in this family are not accidental. Clearly something that was valued and emphasized by her mother and grandparents.

C_R_Eature September 4, 2012 at 9:34 pm

Barack's little sister from Hawai'i! WOOOO RUM DRINKS FOR ALL!

And EDUCATION!

Negropolis September 4, 2012 at 9:35 pm

It's crazy, I was thinking about her just the other day and saying how cool it'd be if she got a speaking spot at the convention. lol

C_R_Eature September 4, 2012 at 9:37 pm

She's great and I love that she's a University Assist. Prof.

emmelemm September 4, 2012 at 9:45 pm

Off topic: Love the poodle moth!

POODLE MOTH!!

C_R_Eature September 4, 2012 at 9:50 pm

Thanks! I fell hard for this thing as soon as I saw it.

ALL HAIL POODLE MOTH!

bobbert September 4, 2012 at 11:47 pm

MUSLIN MOTH LIBEL!!!

mayor_quimby September 4, 2012 at 10:06 pm

Um, poodle moth? I'm afraid to google that, because of the Furry results. What does at mean?

C_R_Eature September 4, 2012 at 10:22 pm

Behold, the Awesome Venezuelan Poodle Moth.

Mumbletypeg September 4, 2012 at 10:39 pm

oh… that is so many kinds of a-w-e-s-o-m-e!

trampndirtdown September 5, 2012 at 12:29 am

Pretty cool in a non cephalopod sort of way.

SorosBot September 4, 2012 at 9:35 pm

More non-white people; this convention definitely seems more colorful than the last one.

An_Outhouse September 4, 2012 at 9:36 pm

feel free to insert 'even Ann Romney' at random. Its the new 'thats what SHE said'.

BarackMyWorld September 4, 2012 at 9:37 pm

You're on.

glasspusher September 4, 2012 at 9:36 pm

Twitter?

TribecaMike September 4, 2012 at 9:38 pm

I barely know her.

Beowoof September 4, 2012 at 9:36 pm

After this I am going to go get a gay abortion tomorrow and then have some french fries.

glasspusher September 4, 2012 at 9:39 pm

Mmm…fries.

An_Outhouse September 4, 2012 at 9:39 pm

flotus says 'no' to the fries

glasspusher September 4, 2012 at 9:46 pm

If she catches me eating them will she spank me? It's on!

Guppy September 4, 2012 at 9:47 pm

Sweet potato fries.

Chet Kincaid_ September 4, 2012 at 9:37 pm

Michelle's brother and Barack's sister! (Maya pulls out the envelope) "And the Presidency goes to…Barack Obama!!"

Joshua Norton September 4, 2012 at 9:38 pm

INVISIBLE MAN IN THE CHAIR!

Hoo Rah!

Finally someone said it!

fuflans September 4, 2012 at 9:38 pm

i hope somebody makes a birther joke.

Chet Kincaid_ September 4, 2012 at 9:40 pm

Lilly Ledbetter! Liberal Southern Ladies are the coolest.

FakaktaSouth September 4, 2012 at 9:51 pm

Oh hell yeah. Have I told you enough times today that you are the coolest?

mayor_quimby September 4, 2012 at 9:57 pm

And Lilly is Southern as a MF, I can taste the sweet tea in her fridge, hon.

rickmaci September 5, 2012 at 12:05 am

Sometimes. My current fav is Cecile Richards.

Isyaignert September 5, 2012 at 2:31 am

I always thought she was an old granny-looking lady, but she's gorgeous!!

SorosBot September 4, 2012 at 9:41 pm

And now Lilly Ledbetter; you'd almost suspect the Democrats care more about women's rights than the GOP does.

Lucidamente1 September 4, 2012 at 9:41 pm

White lady from Alabama praises Obama. More Republican heads explode.

ProgressiveInga September 4, 2012 at 9:41 pm

Favorite sign so far:
Obama Y'all!

Negropolis September 4, 2012 at 9:42 pm

Man, someone has to make that into a bumper sticker.

Negropolis September 4, 2012 at 9:42 pm

Now, that ain't no fake accent.

gullywompr September 4, 2012 at 9:42 pm

I like this ladies night much better than the last one.

fuflans September 4, 2012 at 9:42 pm

to be fair, i'd wage a war on women if my women were like that bagger cow on cnn.

TribecaMike September 4, 2012 at 9:43 pm

Finally, a Swedish-American speaker.

sudsmckenzie September 4, 2012 at 9:44 pm

YES!

Negropolis September 4, 2012 at 9:45 pm

She was born a McDaniel, but we can make an exception.

DrunkIrishman September 4, 2012 at 9:44 pm

Democrats know how to party … for a bunch of rich folk, anyway.

vodkamuppet September 4, 2012 at 9:45 pm

It's so awsome to hear someone with a thick southern accent making sense for a change. Reminds me not to be a dick.

SorosBot September 4, 2012 at 9:46 pm

I still miss Molly Ivins.

ProgressiveInga September 4, 2012 at 9:48 pm

And Ann Richards…..

Negropolis September 4, 2012 at 9:48 pm

I'm wanting to hear that accent say of Romney "Well, bless his heart" and then my week will be complete.

Lucidamente1 September 4, 2012 at 9:45 pm

Lilly Ledbetter just stuck the knife into Mitt. More fapping in casa Lucidamente.

Chet Kincaid_ September 4, 2012 at 9:45 pm

Why don't we have Democratic Conventions in "off-year" elections to harness this kind of energy and drive Congressional majorities? Get the President out there and treat it like it's as important as Presidential years.

rickmaci September 5, 2012 at 12:06 am

I agree. The entire nature of the job, and the so called bully pulpit, has changed. I think the Pres. need to be out on the stump campaigning for his agenda nearly as much as during the electoral campaign.

fuflans September 4, 2012 at 9:47 pm

huh. i heard barack obama hasn't done anything.

Chet Kincaid_ September 4, 2012 at 9:47 pm

Deval Patrick! Another Chicago colored and Taxachusetts Governor! Talkin' trash about the Romney record! "You wouldn't believe the shit I had to clean up after that empty suit!!"

rickmaci September 5, 2012 at 12:07 am

But they are very expensive suits.

DrunkIrishman September 4, 2012 at 9:48 pm

I want to hump Lilly Ledbetter's drawl.

SorosBot September 4, 2012 at 9:48 pm

Ha Deval Patrick ripping apart Romney's record as governor is awesome.

vodkamuppet September 4, 2012 at 9:56 pm

He is fucking OWNING this shit. I'm getting a boner.

SorosBot September 4, 2012 at 9:57 pm

He's on fire; I haven't really heard Patrick speak before, but he is awesome.

MissTaken September 4, 2012 at 10:00 pm

Answer your skype!

Guppy September 4, 2012 at 9:48 pm

Sitting governor of Massachusetts mentions that his state is ahead in healthcare coverage, and neglects to say why.

I'm torn.

Veritas78 September 4, 2012 at 10:20 pm

Yup, he pulled that punch, but for a reason, I heard. (Two nights left.)

DrunkIrishman September 4, 2012 at 9:48 pm

LOOK, GUYS! OBAMA IS ON…oh wait, that's Deval Patrick.

finallyhappy September 4, 2012 at 9:51 pm

an old white lady told me she liked Barack Obama – pointing at our lt. gov. Anthony Brown

DrunkIrishman September 4, 2012 at 9:53 pm

Bless her heart.

mayor_quimby September 4, 2012 at 9:56 pm

It's cool, simple mistake

Negropolis September 4, 2012 at 9:58 pm

I mean, all black politicians look alike, right? Obama's only like half-a-foot taller. lol

deanbooth September 4, 2012 at 9:48 pm

Jesse, remember that this is tv for the blind. Please use more nouns and action verbs.

Negropolis September 4, 2012 at 9:48 pm

Bill Murray!

Badonkadonkette September 4, 2012 at 9:49 pm

You know what would be fucking brilliant? I mean, what would be a pitch-perfect satire of Eastwood lecturing Invisobama, AND galvanize Democrats and prove to independents and undecideds that mittens is a flip-flopping spineless weasel? A video debate between Mittens and Mittens, moderated by, I dunno, a hologram of William F. Buckley. Just running video of Mittens on both sides of every issue. It would be brilliant. It would be the greatest moment in convention history. And so, I have no expectations that the Democrats will do it. :(

SorosBot September 4, 2012 at 9:51 pm

It was awesome when The Daily Show did that with W.

HouseOfTheBlueLights September 4, 2012 at 9:53 pm
rickmaci September 5, 2012 at 12:09 am

Great line that only had a moment tonight was Ted Kennedy's description of Mitt the Flipper. We don't know if he is pro choice, he's multiple choice, or something to that effect.

not that Dewey September 4, 2012 at 9:49 pm
C_R_Eature September 4, 2012 at 10:05 pm

We had to make room for the Great Old Ones.

If they're upset now, wait until Wednesday's human sacrifice.

CthuNHu September 4, 2012 at 10:17 pm

God: Breitbart Booted from Earthly Existence

Barrelhse September 4, 2012 at 11:40 pm

Of course they booted him. He was standing there yelling at an empty cross.

not that Dewey September 5, 2012 at 12:04 am

HA!

Chet Kincaid_ September 4, 2012 at 9:49 pm

Gay marriage and the Cayman Islands are clearly the most popular topics at this convention, applause-meter wise! If they were offering gay weddings on the Cayman Islands, pandemonium would break out!!

SorosBot September 4, 2012 at 9:49 pm

And yay that the Democratic Party seems to have finally realized that they can campaign on legalizing same-sex marriage instead of running from it.

Isyaignert September 5, 2012 at 2:37 am

If they'd only run on supporting cannabis legalization, they'd have a home run. People who never voted before would vote for someone who supported that. 'kna!!

Negropolis September 5, 2012 at 2:58 am

Funny what leadership from a president will do on a timely, righteous issue, innit?

ProgressiveInga September 4, 2012 at 9:50 pm

If I weren't already gay, I'd totally turn gay after watching all of this gay-lovin'!

HouseOfTheBlueLights September 4, 2012 at 9:50 pm

What is the backdrop– is that amber waves of grain, or is it some hippie prairie restoration?

Negropolis September 4, 2012 at 9:51 pm

Shit just got real thanks to Duval. Yep, he's still running for president.

fuflans September 4, 2012 at 9:51 pm

you KNOW deval was thinking 'grow a pair'.

MissTaken September 4, 2012 at 9:51 pm

Fuck yeah, Deval!

BigSkullF*ckingDog September 4, 2012 at 9:51 pm

Needz moar smug white bastards!

(not really)

ProgressiveInga September 4, 2012 at 9:52 pm

Deval es en fuego!

Lucidamente1 September 4, 2012 at 9:52 pm

Time for Democrats to grow a spine? You mean they don't have one?

Crank_Tango September 4, 2012 at 9:52 pm

I believe Kal lost the role in Slumdog Million Dollar Baby, amirite?

Negropolis September 4, 2012 at 9:53 pm

**MSNBC cuts to gay black dude in the audience**

**Another Sikh spotting**

HouseOfTheBlueLights September 4, 2012 at 9:57 pm

Somewhere there is an intern madly photographing and making a searchable catalog of every "type" in the audience.

Negropolis September 4, 2012 at 9:59 pm

All they need is a Asian lesbian latina, and they will have won the night.

CthuNHu September 4, 2012 at 10:22 pm

That's what she said…

Jukesgrrl September 4, 2012 at 10:15 pm

They have some man in a garish red, white, and blue outfit they keep panning on every time someone mentions teh ghey. In fact, he is just dressed like half the people at the GOP convention. Only he's thinner.

MissTaken September 4, 2012 at 9:53 pm

Dems are so much more attractive than last week's GOP delegates.

SorosBot September 4, 2012 at 9:54 pm

Some of them are even under 60.

DrunkIrishman September 4, 2012 at 9:53 pm

Patrick fired up and ready to go!

mayor_quimby September 4, 2012 at 9:56 pm

Deval is setting this bitch on fire. He reminds me of Larry Wilmott on the Daily
Show. He's the Senior Black Governor.

vodkamuppet September 4, 2012 at 9:53 pm

Deval Patrick 2016 motherfuckers!!!!

HouseOfTheBlueLights September 4, 2012 at 9:57 pm

Deval/Tammy!

Jukesgrrl September 4, 2012 at 10:16 pm

Oh, seriously, he was GREAT. Did he cut in on Marty O'Malley's time? East Coast Gang War!

FakaktaSouth September 4, 2012 at 9:53 pm

I've seen 3 minutes of this and I understood all of the words. I'm saying already better than whatever the hell that was last week. HEY And HE SAID GEORGE W BUSH, so more balls than that other too!

rickmaci September 5, 2012 at 12:10 am

This is watchable. Bet the rating double the Repugs.

finallyhappy September 4, 2012 at 9:53 pm

PBS just showed Biden chewing while an aide had a plate of something behind him

mayor_quimby September 4, 2012 at 10:01 pm

Those BBQ wings are damn good in Charlotte!

Jukesgrrl September 4, 2012 at 10:17 pm

Uncle Joe likes the vinegar.

SorosBot September 4, 2012 at 9:53 pm

OSAMA STILL DEAD!

Negropolis September 4, 2012 at 9:54 pm

And Generla Motors is alive!

Come here a minute September 4, 2012 at 9:59 pm

Along with Generalissimo Francisco Franco.

fuflans September 4, 2012 at 9:54 pm

i like it when dems get stabby.

Guppy September 4, 2012 at 9:57 pm

Usually they're more about self-cutting.

Jukesgrrl September 4, 2012 at 10:18 pm

Not any more. There's luuurve in the Original Big Tent.

mayor_quimby September 4, 2012 at 10:24 pm

Hooolian is quite stabby, but I don't mean that in a stereotypical way, just in a good politics way.

DrunkIrishman September 4, 2012 at 9:55 pm

Mitt Romney's metal ass has just been short circuited.

C_R_Eature September 4, 2012 at 9:55 pm

So far tonight, I've seen every speaker gleefully land at least one solid, devastating hit on the Republicans in general and Mitt Romney in particular. It's like these folks have been just itching for the chance to have their say after having been bombarded by more and more extreme right wing nonsense for almost four years.

I like it. This week might just be fun.

Joshua Norton September 4, 2012 at 9:55 pm

"Grow a backbone and stand up for what we believe"

HELL YEAH

sudsmckenzie September 4, 2012 at 9:55 pm

Please tell us about the time you ran into a fiery building to save Harold Fords Bearer Bonds

subsum September 4, 2012 at 9:55 pm

Deval Patrick is really bringing it and he's saying the right things. My favorite was (paraphrasing): "…grow a backbone, beotchez!" Gotta love the guy.

DrunkIrishman September 4, 2012 at 9:56 pm

Republicans are like, "Oh shit, we're gonna have another black president, aren't we?"

rickmaci September 5, 2012 at 12:11 am

I don't think the adjective they are using is "black".

Negropolis September 4, 2012 at 9:56 pm

You know, I've heard on more than one occasion even from some Dems that Dems don't have a deep bench for 2016. I say to that bullshit and poppycock. Thank you.

Jukesgrrl September 4, 2012 at 10:19 pm

I concur.

mrblifil September 4, 2012 at 10:19 pm

I think Gillibrand is the one to watch. And not just for the obvious reasons. I like to watch.

miss_grundy September 4, 2012 at 11:34 pm

They have Mr. Castro of San Antonio, TX. I would love for him to take over the White House in 2016 so Republican heads can explode.

fuflans September 4, 2012 at 9:57 pm

well when you put it like that deval, republican talking points sounds pretty stupid.

Chet Kincaid_ September 4, 2012 at 11:52 pm

That's the Chicago Way!

Lucidamente1 September 4, 2012 at 9:58 pm

Ok, a white guy with blow dried hair. I feel much better.

Guppy September 4, 2012 at 9:59 pm

Jesse: I'd rather be talking policy than weaksauce Talibangelical "theology."

SorosBot September 4, 2012 at 9:59 pm

The Maryland governor is nowhere near as good as Deval. Boring long war stories.

Negropolis September 4, 2012 at 10:01 pm

I keep hearing O'Malley mentioned as a candidate for 2016, and while I'm sure he was a great mayor and is a great governor, everytime I've seen him speak I don't see him as presidential material. I mean, I've seen people absolutely rave over him.

Terry September 4, 2012 at 10:17 pm

Celtic rock band. Hot in that altar boy you'd like to lead astray way. Trying to protect our resources, intrastucture, schools and colleges, despite the economic downturn. I like him.

Negropolis September 4, 2012 at 10:19 pm

That's the thing; I like him, too. I don't love him like you would for someone who'd be your first pick for a presidential ticket.

Jukesgrrl September 4, 2012 at 10:21 pm

Those people raving over him … that would be our girl LimeyLizzie? She loves her some O'Malley. Who says the English can't get along with the Irish?

Terry September 4, 2012 at 10:14 pm

Yeah, but he's hot, has his own Celtic rock band, and has his priorities generally in the right order.

BigSkullF*ckingDog September 4, 2012 at 9:59 pm

Is it just me, or are the flag pins getting bigger?

glasspusher September 4, 2012 at 10:02 pm

Maybe the people are shrinking? The mikes look bigger too.

Isyaignert September 5, 2012 at 2:51 am

Thank you for the segue. I noticed some red dot diamond thing in all of the 'cons flag pins at their CONvention last week. Anyone else notice? What's that all about?

Arborista September 4, 2012 at 9:59 pm

Was that Tony Shalhoub I just saw in the audience? His face was down, but it sure looked like Monk…

TribecaMike September 4, 2012 at 10:04 pm

That had to be Monk. Sitting next to John Leguizamo too.

not that Dewey September 4, 2012 at 10:11 pm

"I was born natural, but I was raised Caesarean."

ChessieNefercat September 4, 2012 at 11:39 pm

And Alfre Woodard.

finallyhappy September 4, 2012 at 10:05 pm

They keep showing him- did he have his finger on his lips- he was doing that earlier

Arborista September 4, 2012 at 10:13 pm

He had his head down- looked like he was texting…

vodkamuppet September 4, 2012 at 9:59 pm

What fucking planet does David Brooks live on?

fuflans September 4, 2012 at 10:04 pm

the same one as matt continetti i'd guess.

Arborista September 4, 2012 at 10:13 pm

Planet Derp,

C_R_Eature September 4, 2012 at 10:18 pm

Uranus?

TribecaMike September 4, 2012 at 10:00 pm

David Brooks on PBS a minute ago: "American care about two things: balancing the budget and the debt." Oh brother, what art thou?

BarackMyWorld September 4, 2012 at 10:01 pm

David Brooks cares more about sounding smart than being smart.

vodkamuppet September 4, 2012 at 10:03 pm

I almost did a spit take. Nothing he's said tonight has even a tenuous connection with reality.

deanbooth September 4, 2012 at 10:04 pm

What a tool! Americans care about putting food on their families.

Zango Crudmonger September 4, 2012 at 10:07 pm

Well, I've bacon grease and bourbon on my chin, so I'm going with your statement as completely accurate.

Jukesgrrl September 4, 2012 at 10:24 pm

In his world, there are no women at home with too many children to feed, no one is in the military unless they work at the Pentagon, no one has ever carried a union card, everyone's student debt is paid by their daddy, and people still vacation in Europe.

Native_of_SL_UT September 4, 2012 at 10:53 pm

Brooks is right about the 2 things I care about.
I care about my fucking budget and my fucking debt and these Repubes ain't helping either..

trampndirtdown September 5, 2012 at 12:41 am

Last week they cared more about Honey Boo Boo.

finallyhappy September 4, 2012 at 10:00 pm

MY GOVERNOR!!!! Martin!!

Jukesgrrl September 4, 2012 at 10:25 pm

"Lucky you," sobbed the grrl in Arizona.

BarackMyWorld September 4, 2012 at 10:00 pm

I can't decide if the awkwardness of O'Malley's speech is the delivery or the writing.

MissTaken September 4, 2012 at 10:01 pm

It's the white maleness.

TribecaMike September 4, 2012 at 10:02 pm

I'm a bit disappointed that he isn't speaking in Gaelic.

finallyhappy September 4, 2012 at 10:06 pm

He should be playing music with his band

Guppy September 4, 2012 at 10:02 pm

Delivery. O'Malley had moar awkwardness right at the opening of the convention earlier.

Guppy September 4, 2012 at 10:00 pm

O'Malley is going to keep going with this until the crowd gets their timing with the signs right!

DrunkIrishman September 4, 2012 at 10:01 pm

oooh! I LOVE STAGE INTERACTION! IT MAKES ME FEEL PART OF THE SHOW! I AM SO SITTING IN MY LIVING ROOM SCREAMING AT THE TV … "FORWARD, NOT BACK!"

Guppy September 4, 2012 at 10:04 pm

STRAIGHT, NO ICE!

kittensdontlie September 4, 2012 at 10:02 pm

White people can't jump or fire a crowd up.

Guppy September 4, 2012 at 10:04 pm

JOE BIDEN LIBEL!

Oh, wait, I forgot he was made an honorary Colored Person.

C_R_Eature September 4, 2012 at 10:02 pm

Martin O'Malley Kids! It's nice to have a governor that doesn't make me cringe, for once.

"Forward, not Back!" Now, that's a good call and response line.

TribecaMike September 4, 2012 at 10:05 pm

I like him more as governor than as mayor of Baltimore.

C_R_Eature September 4, 2012 at 10:09 pm

Yeah, I don't think he was really a good fit for that town. Stephanie Rawlings Blake seems to be doing OK, though considering what she had to step into .

finallyhappy September 4, 2012 at 10:17 pm

It's not new- he used it here in the state for some time

Barrelhse September 4, 2012 at 11:48 pm

"Give me an F,…"

FakaktaSouth September 4, 2012 at 10:02 pm

I would say voucher and W as often as I could, movie-phone talking guy O'Malley.

vodkamuppet September 4, 2012 at 10:04 pm

This guys a buzz kill, bring back Deval Patrick.

coolhandnuke September 4, 2012 at 10:05 pm

O's blister Toronto 12-0, Yanks losing, now O'Malley hitting 'em deep…a fine day for Charm City.

Barrelhse September 4, 2012 at 11:50 pm

Anyone but the Yankees. Go Baltimore!

BigSkullF*ckingDog September 4, 2012 at 10:05 pm

I like what this guy is saying, but I feel like I'm about to buy a used Honda civic.

Doktor Zoom September 4, 2012 at 10:05 pm

O'Malley is starting to grow on me

gullywompr September 4, 2012 at 10:06 pm

Too white-guy-y for me….

Barrelhse September 4, 2012 at 11:51 pm

Like a Siamese twin?

Designer_Rants September 4, 2012 at 11:55 pm

We should make OMalley and Dr. Zoom a 2-headed T-shirt that says "We watched this speech with the signs and and the backing and the forthing and all we got was this lousy T-shirt".

Negropolis September 5, 2012 at 12:02 am

He's growing on me, too, but mostly like moss on the side of a log.

trampndirtdown September 5, 2012 at 12:45 am

His delivery was pretty blah tonight. Ii've seen him really tear it up a few times, but it was always off the cuff, this is the first time I watched him give a prepared speech. Not impressed.

Guppy September 4, 2012 at 10:06 pm

I think people would be more impressed with his speech if he was doing it shirtless.

ibwilliamsi September 4, 2012 at 10:06 pm

OK, I went to the Casa after my meeting, and it was dark. Man, I NEVER expected you guys to stop partying that early!

BarackMyWorld September 4, 2012 at 10:06 pm

O'Malley sounds a little like a TV evangelist now.

HouseOfTheBlueLights September 4, 2012 at 10:06 pm

en Espanol, por favor

ProgressiveInga September 4, 2012 at 10:16 pm

Yo quiero Taco Bell!

IonaTrailer September 4, 2012 at 10:06 pm

As a "legal" pot smoker, I'm totally disappointed that we aren't hearing jack shit about the "Drug War". sigh. I know, I know, we're hoping he'll get to it, but for all my brothers and sisters who are in prison for smoking the sacred weed – (or just for being mentally ill and using drugs – or not mentally ill and using drugs) – can we please stop the maddness?

Zango Crudmonger September 4, 2012 at 10:12 pm

Too much for the center/undecided voters to stomach, I would guess. It's going to left for the states to hammer out for this election. I believe both OR and CA have legalization on the ballots this fall.

Isyaignert September 5, 2012 at 2:58 am

Washington, Oregon and Colorado have legalization ballots in the next election.
Yes we cannabis!!

Negropolis September 5, 2012 at 6:56 am

I think this is a second term thing. Hell, I was surprised he didn't wait until the second term to come out in favor of same sex marriage.

Negropolis September 4, 2012 at 10:07 pm

I heard a little Kennedy at the very end of O'Malley's speech. It's just too bad he had to follow Patrick.

Terry September 4, 2012 at 10:28 pm

O'Malley's wife is a judge and is father-in-law is the junior Senator from the great State of Maryland, aka Ben Cardin.

Lucidamente1 September 4, 2012 at 10:07 pm

Twin brothers. Which one is the evil one?

Geminisunmars September 5, 2012 at 12:18 am

The one named Castro.

DrunkIrishman September 4, 2012 at 10:08 pm

I KNEW THE DEMOCRATS WERE CLONING PEOPLE!

fuflans September 4, 2012 at 10:08 pm

hahahahahaa democrats get to use whatever music they want and nobody sues them!

Guppy September 4, 2012 at 10:09 pm

The DNC crowd chanting "Castro!"

What could possibly go wrong?

subsum September 4, 2012 at 10:12 pm

Isn't that in San Francisco?

Biff September 4, 2012 at 10:09 pm

Twins! Doesn't live up to MY fantasy, but knock yerselves out, ladies…

finallyhappy September 4, 2012 at 10:20 pm

I understand twins is a big fantasy for some men and women- always seemed like horror movie time to me. But these guys seem like they would be good sons!

shelwood46 September 5, 2012 at 2:38 am

The twin thing icks me out because it means you're essentially fantasizing about incest. You're not just wanting siblings to get naked and have sexy times together, you want siblings who look alike to get naked and have sexy times together. Would you want to have sex with your clone? Ew.

An_Outhouse September 4, 2012 at 10:09 pm

tonight we are all texans. yuck:-)

Barrelhse September 4, 2012 at 11:55 pm

Rick Perry can count to potato.

Negropolis September 4, 2012 at 10:09 pm

Okay, close your eyes and listen to Castro, and you hear Obama. Weird.

gullywompr September 4, 2012 at 10:11 pm

I can't get past the feeling that I'm listening to Keanu Reeves.

Guppy September 4, 2012 at 10:13 pm

woah

mayor_quimby September 4, 2012 at 10:13 pm

Dude is good, he's going to kick Jindal's ass in 20-something
Twins that went to Stanford??? That's some Cosby show shit.

Doktor Zoom September 4, 2012 at 10:09 pm

I liked when this guy debated Alan Alda in season 7 of The West Wing.

vodkamuppet September 4, 2012 at 10:11 pm

No FLOTUS tonight? I haz teh confuse.

Doktor Zoom September 4, 2012 at 10:14 pm

She's after Jimmy Smits

IndianaKevin September 4, 2012 at 10:17 pm

FLOTUS is on deck.

IonaTrailer September 4, 2012 at 10:11 pm

Viva la Grandma!

miss_grundy September 4, 2012 at 11:39 pm

Viva Abuela!!!!!!

TribecaMike September 4, 2012 at 10:11 pm

What, no phony exaggerated Texas accent a la a certain Connectitard I could name?

mayor_quimby September 4, 2012 at 10:14 pm

W ho?

TribecaMike September 4, 2012 at 10:18 pm

William F. Buckley, Jr.

iburl September 4, 2012 at 10:18 pm

HT

sudsmckenzie September 4, 2012 at 10:11 pm

Tonight, in the US Bank Octagon its Marco Rubio vs Juan Castro

iTuna September 4, 2012 at 10:13 pm

Julian.

sudsmckenzie September 4, 2012 at 10:16 pm

does it matter?, and thanks, now I cant edit that, papers please!

Terry September 4, 2012 at 10:11 pm

Grammy Castro has tears in her eyes. Very sweet. I hate menudo, but would eat it if this lady served it to me.

rickmaci September 5, 2012 at 12:31 am

Mexican grandmas. You tell her you don't like menudo and 10 minutes later she is serving you something else you do like.

coolhandnuke September 4, 2012 at 10:12 pm

Winning a Menudo cookoff…I've heard Ricky Martin tastes like chicken.

iburl September 4, 2012 at 10:13 pm

Julian Castro – a real Texan from Texas, not Connecticut.

SorosBot September 4, 2012 at 11:30 pm

Just because someone was born in Connecticut doesn't make him not a Texan when he lived there his entire life. Texas owns him.

Negropolis September 4, 2012 at 11:32 pm

You should tell a Texan that. lol It seems to cut across ideological lines, down there, that unless you were born on its soil, you're not ever a true Texan.

SorosBot September 4, 2012 at 11:34 pm

That doesn't make any sense at all.

BerkeleyBear September 5, 2012 at 12:02 am

You are talking about Texans – so yes.

Chet Kincaid_ September 5, 2012 at 12:03 am

Then why did they love W so much?

Negropolis September 5, 2012 at 12:04 am

They loved him like hell, but that doesn't mean they thought he was a "real" Texan. Texans have a thing about being born in Texas. Don't ask me to explain it, it's just what I've personally experienced.

Maybe one of our Texas Wonketters can back me up on this. I thought this was a pretty well known quirk of Texans.

iburl September 5, 2012 at 11:21 am

"his entire life"… except when he spent every summer in the Hamptons, and went to Yale and Harvard, and spent a lot of time in the White House with his daddy (also not a real Texan).

Bush is a fake Texan, don't ever forget that.

vaginista September 4, 2012 at 10:13 pm

Si se puede!

Doktor Zoom September 4, 2012 at 10:14 pm

Haw–bootstraps

FakaktaSouth September 4, 2012 at 10:15 pm

I still don't know how you would pull yourself up that way without falling over on your head.

SorosBot September 4, 2012 at 10:14 pm

This convention actually looks like America.

iTuna September 4, 2012 at 10:15 pm

The RNC looked like the drive-through line at my local Little Caesar's.

Guppy September 4, 2012 at 10:17 pm

Not Real America™!

C_R_Eature September 4, 2012 at 10:17 pm

I'm just happy I don't have to wear Ray-Bans to look at this week's crowd.

fuflans September 4, 2012 at 10:15 pm

this makes too much sense. texas is going to fire his ass.

subsum September 4, 2012 at 10:17 pm

He's from San Antonio. Rick Perry is not allowed to go there. If he does all the messicans will kick his ass. We're stuck with him here in Austin—for now.

NellCote71 September 4, 2012 at 10:18 pm

Nah. San Antonio is blue and twice as cool as Austin, and not nearly self- conscious.

BaldarTFlagass September 5, 2012 at 8:18 am

Or as self-important. Plus, we sent Henry B. Gonzales to Washington for 40 years.

"González was referred to as a "communist" in 1986 by a man at Earl Abel's restaurant, a popular San Antonio eatery. The 70 year-old representative responded by punching him in the face. González was acquitted of assault for this incident."

IonaTrailer September 4, 2012 at 10:15 pm

They may have boots with boot-straps in parts of Texas, but where I live, there are people on Skid Row wit' no shoes.
Signed,
Los Angeles

rickmaci September 5, 2012 at 12:30 am

Yah. I didn't get the strap on reference.

BigSkullF*ckingDog September 4, 2012 at 10:16 pm

Castro? Fucking communist.

Terry September 4, 2012 at 10:18 pm

Good speech and an adoring granny.

NellCote71 September 4, 2012 at 10:29 pm

That is his Mom. His grandmother is dead.

Terry September 4, 2012 at 10:33 pm

Well, she's granny to that gorgeous little girl, but I stand corrected!

Designer_Rants September 4, 2012 at 10:16 pm

Man, that Deval Patrick just might win 230 electoral votes on write in! Don't worry Mittens, you'll still get Mississippi.

~Yeah, I'm watching DVR… But I fast forwarded through Gov. "Things Were Better Under Dumbya", so I'm almost in real-time.

FakaktaSouth September 4, 2012 at 10:18 pm

Sorry dude, no. Mitt's not a good guy. He doesn't CARE how bad OTHERS have it. That's different.

rickmaci September 5, 2012 at 12:28 am

It's OK. Say he is a good guy and then kick him in the nutz again.

HouseOfTheBlueLights September 4, 2012 at 10:18 pm

C'mon, Texas, bring up a quote from your roots (i.e. the late great Ann Richards)– "He can't help it. He was born with a silver foot in his mouth"

Negropolis September 4, 2012 at 10:22 pm

I like the PG-13 version: "He can't help it; he was born with a silver stick up his ass."

Terry September 4, 2012 at 10:34 pm

I miss Ann. Molly Ivins, too.

ProgressiveInga September 4, 2012 at 10:18 pm

Suck it mucho grande Rmoney/Ryan!

Jukesgrrl September 4, 2012 at 10:28 pm

You mean mucho rico. Nothing grande about them (except for Christie).

gullywompr September 4, 2012 at 10:18 pm

This guy knows how to give a speech.

Guppy September 4, 2012 at 10:19 pm

OK, this is the evil twin. He's fucking with the crowd now.

fuflans September 4, 2012 at 10:20 pm

'fiction'.

i like 'lie' better.

Doktor Zoom September 4, 2012 at 10:20 pm

OH, MY!!!! That "actually…." was one HELL of a pivot!

fuflans September 4, 2012 at 10:20 pm

damn he's good.

BarackMyWorld September 4, 2012 at 10:20 pm

"Romney said…actually…yes."

That was moment of the night.

Negropolis September 4, 2012 at 10:20 pm

It was amazing. And the way he held his smile and let the crowd catch up was brilliant optics.

mayor_quimby September 4, 2012 at 10:22 pm

That was some knife in the gut theatrics there, very very good. And the crowd was even on script yelling 'Romney said no'

Terry September 4, 2012 at 10:20 pm

OMG, is that Castro's daughter? She's a cutie.

finallyhappy September 4, 2012 at 10:24 pm

Castro married Erica Lira Castro in 2007. They have one daughter, Carina Victoria Castro, born March 14, 2009

TribecaMike September 4, 2012 at 10:21 pm

"Whenever I run into prejudice, I smile and feel sorry for them, and I say to myself, There's one more argument for birth control." — Freddy Fender, born Baldemar Garza Huerta in Texas

vodkamuppet September 4, 2012 at 10:22 pm

He said Detroit, drink!

Designer_Rants September 4, 2012 at 10:22 pm

Texas has education?

An_Outhouse September 4, 2012 at 10:23 pm

new bumper sticker- GoT IT DONE!!

iburl September 4, 2012 at 10:23 pm

CASTROOBAMA!!!!!!

glamourdammerung September 4, 2012 at 10:24 pm

I loved that serial.

Oh, you were not talking about "Doctor Who" were you?

TribecaMike September 4, 2012 at 10:35 pm

Was that during the Sarah Jane Smith years?

trampndirtdown September 5, 2012 at 12:52 am

5th Doctor I believe.

gullywompr September 4, 2012 at 10:23 pm

I wish this guy would stop sugar-coating it….

DrunkIrishman September 4, 2012 at 10:24 pm

Let's find a Kennedy and run him with Castro in 2016.

Veritas78 September 4, 2012 at 10:29 pm

We saw the handsome young redhead earlier tonight…

Jukesgrrl September 4, 2012 at 10:30 pm

No Castros until they turn Tejas blue. Then, the sky's the limit.

NellCote71 September 4, 2012 at 10:35 pm

Hell, yes.

Jukesgrrl September 5, 2012 at 1:57 am

We're on the same page tonight, sister.

sullivanst September 5, 2012 at 9:21 am

When Tejas turns blue, we can tell Florida to go fuck itself. That will be awesome.

NellCote71 September 4, 2012 at 10:31 pm

Joe III has my vote. Kennedy genes are amazing.

vodkamuppet September 4, 2012 at 10:34 pm

Oh god that would be awsome.

Guppy September 4, 2012 at 10:25 pm

Contrast this with the "me me me! *cough*voteforMitt*cough*" of the speeches last Tuesday

ProgressiveInga September 4, 2012 at 10:25 pm

"The American dream isn't a sprint or a marathon. It's a relay" OK, I'm cryin'.

NellCote71 September 4, 2012 at 10:32 pm

I want that bumper sticker. And screw you Mr. Under Two Ryan. Asshat.

rickmaci September 5, 2012 at 12:25 am

It was under three and he is still an asshat. It would be a great bumper sticker. Every runner I know would want one.

BoroPrimorac September 4, 2012 at 10:25 pm

I hope he ends his speech by telling Marco Rubio to eat shit.

"Comete un mojon, Marco Rubio" (drops mic and walks away)

vodkamuppet September 4, 2012 at 10:25 pm

Relay. That is a great line.

IonaTrailer September 4, 2012 at 10:26 pm

For some it is "FOUR MORE YEARS" and for others it is "FEEL MY QUEERS!"
xoxoxoxxoxo

(in a good way, not a Republican way.)

Lucidamente1 September 4, 2012 at 10:26 pm

He could do the empty chair routine, but sitting down in it to play his twin. Ok, not funny, but still better than Eastwood.

Doktor Zoom September 4, 2012 at 10:27 pm

This is one hell of a closing.

FakaktaSouth September 4, 2012 at 10:27 pm

He just did the newscaster sudden Spanish accent thing! YAY!

Designer_Rants September 4, 2012 at 10:29 pm

I call it "The NPR Slide".

Negropolis September 4, 2012 at 10:30 pm

ROTFLMAO! I'e got to remember that.

deanbooth September 4, 2012 at 10:32 pm

Like they're from May-he-co?

gullywompr September 4, 2012 at 10:27 pm

How about those optics, ladies & gents?

Negropolis September 4, 2012 at 10:27 pm

Wait, a few moments ago, did we get a cross contaminated chant of "Four More Years" and "O-Ba-Ma"?

subsum September 4, 2012 at 10:28 pm

"The American dream is not a sprint; nor a marathon; but a relay." So over-fucking-whelmingly true it's a slap in the face of people like Mitt Romney. This dude is living proof and I dare Sarah Palin, Michelle Malkin and Rush Limbaugh to question it.

FakaktaSouth September 4, 2012 at 10:28 pm

MICHEEEEEELLLLLLEEEE! oh I love you. Cheers!

Doktor Zoom September 4, 2012 at 10:29 pm

Little girl sees herself on TV, does the "I'm pretty" move.

KAWAIIIIII!!!!!!!

gullywompr September 4, 2012 at 10:29 pm

Awesome visual.

Guppy September 4, 2012 at 10:29 pm

"I spell it with two L's, motherfuckers!"

iburl September 4, 2012 at 10:29 pm

Bohner is opening up an extra Puffs with lotion tonight.

Guppy September 4, 2012 at 10:31 pm

So am I, but for different reasons.

deanbooth September 4, 2012 at 10:30 pm

Where are the lies and distortions that the Washington Post said are part of every convention? Whatever will the Both Sides Do It mega force do?

CthuNHu September 4, 2012 at 10:40 pm

Claim: With enough hard work, you can raise your own Barack-Oli.

Fact: There is not any such vegetable as Barack-Oli.

Conclusion: Michelle Obama's lie robs Democrats of the moral high ground and prevents them from taking issue with Paul Ryan's statements.

glamourdammerung September 4, 2012 at 10:43 pm

Whatever will the Both Sides Do It mega force do?

Lie.

Veritas78 September 4, 2012 at 11:27 pm

What, give a from-the-heart, passionate, true paean to a man worth both loving and electing? No, both sides do not do that.

Lucidamente1 September 4, 2012 at 10:30 pm

Must not think impure thoughts about FLOTUS, must not think impure thoughts about FLOTUS . . . Oh, fuck it.

An_Outhouse September 4, 2012 at 10:31 pm

flotus next? glad i have a tablet. brb.

C_R_Eature September 4, 2012 at 10:31 pm

You know, I've always thought that Michelle looked exactly like a First lady.

Designer_Rants September 4, 2012 at 10:33 pm

You must not be an old racist trailer-trash Republican delegate, then.

C_R_Eature September 4, 2012 at 10:36 pm

Did the spelling give me away?

Designer_Rants September 4, 2012 at 10:44 pm

And lack of WingNutz font (!!!!!!!!!1!!)

HouseOfTheBlueLights September 4, 2012 at 10:35 pm

I've always thought the whole family looks like that family in all the car ads. Absolutely quintessentially American.

Negropolis September 4, 2012 at 10:37 pm

THIS. Comment of the night.

Designer_Rants September 4, 2012 at 10:32 pm

Castro's mom keeps givin' him the stinkeye.

Guppy September 4, 2012 at 10:32 pm

"99%!" Drink!

RadioBowels September 4, 2012 at 10:32 pm

Julián Castro '16

BigSkullF*ckingDog September 4, 2012 at 10:34 pm

I would like to see Michelle kick Ann Romneys ass.

HouseOfTheBlueLights September 4, 2012 at 10:35 pm

I think you're about to.

Veritas78 September 4, 2012 at 11:28 pm

…aaaaaand, you just did.

Negropolis September 4, 2012 at 10:36 pm

Forget Ann, I want her to go straight to the top and arm wrestle Mitt Romney for the presidency.

Steverino247 September 4, 2012 at 10:36 pm

Nah, that would be like beating toddlers at checkers.

gullywompr September 4, 2012 at 10:37 pm

So would Michael Steele.

deanbooth September 4, 2012 at 10:38 pm

With votes!

C_R_Eature September 4, 2012 at 10:38 pm

I'd like to see Michelle drop-kick Paul Ryan in the Nads.

miss_grundy September 4, 2012 at 11:50 pm

Si se puede!!!!!!!!!!

Lucidamente1 September 4, 2012 at 10:34 pm

Republicans everywhere throwing peanuts at the tv screen

EdFlintstone September 4, 2012 at 10:35 pm

I kid you not, Fox News has shampoo man Paul Mitchell offering his insights during the Michelle video.

TribecaMike September 4, 2012 at 10:37 pm

Assholes.

C_R_Eature September 4, 2012 at 10:37 pm

You forgot the quotation marks around "News".

NellCote71 September 4, 2012 at 10:38 pm

I thought he died? Srsly.

FlownOver September 4, 2012 at 10:43 pm

Rode a ski lift with him years ago. Once a dick, always a dick.

EdFlintstone September 4, 2012 at 10:44 pm

It was John Paul DeJoria who is co-founder.

subsum September 4, 2012 at 10:38 pm

Fuck Fox.

LibrarianX September 5, 2012 at 11:09 am

Hey! They need some time to edit….

BigSkullF*ckingDog September 4, 2012 at 10:35 pm

RNC just pulled the plug on PBS. Or at least my signal.

Zango Crudmonger September 4, 2012 at 10:43 pm
kittensdontlie September 4, 2012 at 10:48 pm

The streaming through the DNC Convention website is must be on a five minute delay!

Terry September 4, 2012 at 10:37 pm

Man, this lady has the whole military service set!

Guppy September 4, 2012 at 10:37 pm

"What am I (a walking political prop) doing in a place like this (a political convention)?"

Guppy September 4, 2012 at 10:37 pm

Wait… Doctor Biden?

fuflans September 4, 2012 at 10:38 pm

yeah, but she's the SMART biden. the other one is, you know, dumb.

finallyhappy September 4, 2012 at 10:39 pm

Jill

Guppy September 4, 2012 at 10:39 pm

Bah. Serves me right for trying to comment too much to pay attention.

Negropolis September 4, 2012 at 10:39 pm

Jill was a professor at a local college, I think.

BarackMyWorld September 4, 2012 at 10:45 pm

Yes, and after teaching high school for years, including children diagnosed as emotional disturbed, before earning a Ph.D.

Zango Crudmonger September 4, 2012 at 10:51 pm

Whereas Janna Ryan likes to go noodling…. http://abcnews.go.com/Politics/OTUS/paul-ryans-wi

Terry September 4, 2012 at 10:52 pm

When she moved to DC when he became VP, she took a teaching position (English, I think) at the Northern Virginia Community College. Before that, she taught in Delaware.

Barbara_ September 5, 2012 at 12:26 am

Negropolis, Jill was a professor who taught my daughter, Christine and helped to shape the woman she became, as I am certain you already know.. I loved me some Jill before handsome Joe was VEEP.

trampndirtdown September 5, 2012 at 12:58 am

that's so cool.

Lucidamente1 September 4, 2012 at 10:37 pm

Lady has five kids in the service and speaking at the DNC. Still more republican heads explode.

Negropolis September 4, 2012 at 10:37 pm

Isn't it crazy that in literally four years we've totally flipped this issue on the Republicans?

Veritas78 September 4, 2012 at 11:31 pm

Well, we actually do care about the troops that the Republicans hurl into unnecessary wars.

trampndirtdown September 5, 2012 at 1:00 am

I kept waiting for her to ask what Mitt's five sons were doing.

gullywompr September 4, 2012 at 10:38 pm

Never play pan-dimensional chess with the DNC.

glasspusher September 4, 2012 at 10:44 pm

Deep Thought.

coolhandnuke September 4, 2012 at 10:41 pm

And Mitt has five service-free boys berating their indentured servants.

CthuNHu September 4, 2012 at 10:44 pm

Hey now, don't rag on those fine young men. They'll all enlist in the Marines posthumously.

Terry September 4, 2012 at 10:53 pm

..and Mitt was a conscientious objector so that he could ride a bike around France and annoy people.

iTuna September 4, 2012 at 10:37 pm

MECHA-MOM, QUEEN OF ALL MATRONS

Lucidamente1 September 4, 2012 at 10:39 pm

Next, hologram Eleanor Roosevelt saying "Ann Romney, eat me."

Terry September 4, 2012 at 10:39 pm

Jaysus, I love Michelle's dress.

MissTaken September 4, 2012 at 10:39 pm

Seriously. The woman can dress.

NellCote71 September 4, 2012 at 10:40 pm

Awesomeness.

SorosBot September 4, 2012 at 10:41 pm

She should be wearing a bland generic red dress, as should every other woman who speaks at the convention!

BoroPrimorac September 4, 2012 at 10:39 pm

I can't imagine what nasty stuff the Teabaggers will say about the military mom.

C_R_Eature September 4, 2012 at 10:39 pm

Wow, what an entrance!

Doktor Zoom September 4, 2012 at 10:39 pm

Huh, I wonder if the Repubs are having second thoughts about not mentioning the troops much last week?

Nah, never mind, their base sincerely believes she hates the flag.

C_R_Eature September 4, 2012 at 10:43 pm

You're assuming that they had first ones.

glasspusher September 4, 2012 at 10:46 pm

Their base can go fuck themselves. We're here for those grounded in reality.

ProgressiveInga September 4, 2012 at 10:39 pm

I'd hit it

With VOTES, people!

Designer_Rants September 4, 2012 at 10:46 pm

WIIIIIITH VOOOOOTES GAWDDAMMIT!

FakaktaSouth September 4, 2012 at 10:39 pm

Oh fuck, Stevie Wonder? the REAL one's voice and not some weird cover version of him? And Lovely Lovely Michelle? Oh I may die.

miss_grundy September 4, 2012 at 11:54 pm

C'mon now, the Dems know their music…..

fuflans September 4, 2012 at 10:39 pm

gorgeous!

Chichikovovich September 4, 2012 at 10:46 pm

You American women are very attractive.

TribecaMike September 4, 2012 at 10:39 pm

Mamacita, que buena estas!

BigSkullF*ckingDog September 4, 2012 at 10:39 pm

Why do I find it hard to believe someone telling me they are not political while they are giving an introduction at a fucking national political convention?

Zango Crudmonger September 4, 2012 at 10:48 pm

Someone forgot his KoolAid. Jokes, it's jell-o shots around here.

Guppy September 4, 2012 at 10:40 pm

And now we all hold our breaths to see if Michelle can trump Ann's sapphic, polyamorous confession.

Designer_Rants September 4, 2012 at 10:47 pm

ARRGH LUVS U WIMMUNZ!

BigSkullF*ckingDog September 4, 2012 at 10:40 pm

Oooooh. Michelle just told the room to STFU!

FakaktaSouth September 4, 2012 at 10:41 pm

She just kicked Mitt's no troops speech in the ass, sentence one. Nice.

iburl September 4, 2012 at 10:41 pm

FOX NEWS ALERT!!! OBAMA HAIR DISASTER!!!

gullywompr September 4, 2012 at 10:41 pm

That's going to be the latest style tomorrow.

TxSpinyLizrd September 4, 2012 at 10:44 pm

Meh. She still looks more fabulous than 99% of the rest of us.

kittensdontlie September 4, 2012 at 10:54 pm

That is very distracting. Everyone was probably afraid to say anything, lest her big brother might kick their ass.

iburl September 4, 2012 at 10:55 pm

The hair stylist is in an unmarked plane right now.

fuflans September 4, 2012 at 10:41 pm

'your family's service and sacrifice'.

something we can't take for granted with chicken hawks.

Lucidamente1 September 4, 2012 at 10:41 pm

Jesus Christ on a three-day bender, this is the hottest convention speaker in the history of the universe.

Designer_Rants September 4, 2012 at 10:41 pm

"I think you're the perfect wife for Obama.", says little kid with braces. Melts your heart and makes you laugh at the same time. But if some dumb Republican kid had said it I'da just shot my teevee, Elvis style.

C_R_Eature September 4, 2012 at 10:42 pm

And they did.

ibwilliamsi September 4, 2012 at 10:42 pm

I want the First Lady's dress.

Terry September 4, 2012 at 10:45 pm

I wonder if ther is a version appropriate for women who don't have the awesome arms of FLOTUS

ChernobylSoup September 4, 2012 at 10:48 pm

…On the floor of my room.

predilectrix September 4, 2012 at 11:26 pm

Oh, I thought you wrote I want to be the First Lady's dress, which seems to be a popular sentiment this evening.

BigSkullF*ckingDog September 4, 2012 at 10:42 pm

Trying not to think impure thoughts about our FLOTUS, but damn those shoulders!

trampndirtdown September 5, 2012 at 1:03 am

Easy girl.

IonaTrailer September 4, 2012 at 10:43 pm

MY girl is red-hot,
Your girl ain't doodle-squat!

Doktor Zoom September 4, 2012 at 10:43 pm

"Like any mother, I thought about our girls"

Typical of the narcissistic selfish focus of those people.

fuflans September 4, 2012 at 10:43 pm

where are these kind caring non judgemental americans michelle obama is seeing?

Lucidamente1 September 4, 2012 at 10:43 pm

"Date night for Barack and me was dinner and a movie. And fucking, lots of fucking."

Joshua Norton September 4, 2012 at 10:44 pm

I broke out in applause for Michelle.

Which is little embarrassing, home alone and clapping.

LePiston September 4, 2012 at 10:44 pm

Michelle has charisma and empathy. Ann has money.

Guppy September 4, 2012 at 10:48 pm

Don't forget Poland Rafalca!

LePiston September 4, 2012 at 10:50 pm

Rafalca > Ann

One is beautiful, one has skrill

IonaTrailer September 4, 2012 at 10:44 pm

HAWAII! REPRESENTING!

Doktor Zoom September 4, 2012 at 10:44 pm

Shoes a half-size too small, eh? You know what they say about guys with big feet….

C_R_Eature September 4, 2012 at 10:45 pm

Big toes?

IonaTrailer September 4, 2012 at 10:45 pm

They have big shoes?

MissTaken September 4, 2012 at 10:46 pm

Big socks?

SorosBot September 4, 2012 at 10:47 pm

Well as a man with very big feet, let me tell you it's true.

Arborista September 5, 2012 at 1:59 am

It's harder to put your foot in your mouth?

sullivanst September 5, 2012 at 9:23 am

Lots of silver?

subsum September 4, 2012 at 10:45 pm

Coffe table picked up from a dumpster? It better be true or she's gonna hear about it from the asswipes from Fox & Friends tomorrow. Facts only matter when pointing them out works to their advantage.

RadioBowels September 4, 2012 at 10:45 pm

I love this lady.

TribecaMike September 4, 2012 at 10:45 pm

Over at Fox, Charles Krauthammer is muttering, "Why is she wear a bathing suit? And what is this feeling I've never felt before?"

deanbooth September 4, 2012 at 10:51 pm

"Mein Führer! I can walk!"

EdFlintstone September 4, 2012 at 10:45 pm

Scott Baio must be killing himself right now.

gullywompr September 4, 2012 at 10:46 pm

in sh'Allah.

Negropolis September 4, 2012 at 10:47 pm

If only we were so lucky. With votes.

TribecaMike September 4, 2012 at 10:50 pm

Hopefully, he'll stop by Kirk Cameron's house first.

Chet Kincaid_ September 4, 2012 at 10:46 pm

How dare that Negress talk about her father's MS?! She's trying to make Ann look bad1!1!!

Veritas78 September 4, 2012 at 11:37 pm

That was pretty uppity! It's like when you upend the napkin by your place at table, and then someone else sits there.

Doktor Zoom September 4, 2012 at 10:46 pm

Why didn't she just sell some stock?

TribecaMike September 4, 2012 at 10:48 pm

Why didn't she just buy her father a horse?

ProgressiveInga September 4, 2012 at 11:01 pm

Or ask her parents for $20 Large?

fuflans September 4, 2012 at 10:46 pm

does michelle have a secret portrait in the white house attic or is bamz aging FOR her?

IonaTrailer September 4, 2012 at 10:46 pm

FUCK YOU MITT ROMNEY

RadioBowels September 4, 2012 at 10:47 pm

FUCK YOU ANN ROMNEY

IonaTrailer September 4, 2012 at 10:48 pm

AND, the horse you rode into town on.

glasspusher September 4, 2012 at 10:52 pm

The horse would be the most satisfying of the three

iburl September 4, 2012 at 11:04 pm

Horse rides on the roof.

BoroPrimorac September 4, 2012 at 10:47 pm

Ann Romney who?

Terry September 4, 2012 at 10:47 pm

That's what it means to be a man, taking care of his family. Damn straight, Michelle!

iburl September 4, 2012 at 10:49 pm

Joe Walsh Libel!

FlownOver September 4, 2012 at 10:50 pm

Somebody send this video to Congressweasel Joe Fucking Walsh (R-Douchebag).

iburl September 4, 2012 at 10:47 pm

Where's the chair? I don't get it.

Designer_Rants September 4, 2012 at 10:55 pm

Even the chair's invisible now. Forward.

gullywompr September 4, 2012 at 10:49 pm

"Truth matters" zing.

ProgressiveInga September 4, 2012 at 10:50 pm

Truth has a liberal bias.

not that Dewey September 4, 2012 at 10:49 pm

MIchelle: "the sex doesn't count unless you earn it fair and square" — did I mishear that?

Guppy September 4, 2012 at 10:50 pm

Up there with Condi's impossible semen.

MissTaken September 4, 2012 at 10:50 pm

*success*

and sex.

gullywompr September 4, 2012 at 10:51 pm

Successful sex is successful.

glasspusher September 4, 2012 at 10:57 pm

Why buy the cow, when you can get the sex for free? -Jay

C_R_Eature September 4, 2012 at 11:02 pm

No, she said:"Ah, get born, keep warm, short pants, romance, learn to dance
Get dressed, get blessed, try to be a suck-sess"

Terry September 4, 2012 at 10:49 pm

I love her to bits.

BarackMyWorld September 4, 2012 at 10:50 pm

I read that too fast.

NellCote71 September 4, 2012 at 11:40 pm

Bad boy.

fuflans September 4, 2012 at 10:49 pm

yeah, but i bet michelle doesn't have a dancing horse now does she?

NellCote71 September 4, 2012 at 11:42 pm

She as the cutest dog second only to mine. Alas, I bet she doesn't get a $77,000 tax deduction for Bo either.

BarackMyWorld September 4, 2012 at 10:49 pm

Michelle's remarks about honesty and "how much money you make" will be taken as subtle swipes at Romney…because they probably are.

Geminisunmars September 5, 2012 at 12:21 am

Subtle?

Doktor Zoom September 4, 2012 at 10:49 pm

"The truth matters"? Rather outmoded thinking. Fact-checkers don't run things, after all.

SorosBot September 4, 2012 at 10:50 pm

Work hard? But these were just workers, not JOB CREATORS! Last week I was told only the owners' work actually counts.

BoroPrimorac September 4, 2012 at 10:52 pm

The republican platform: Makers vs Takers.

iburl September 4, 2012 at 10:52 pm

Happy Belated Labor Day, Job Creators!

Guppy September 4, 2012 at 10:52 pm

Last week? Hell, we got that from Twitter yesterday!

Lucidamente1 September 4, 2012 at 10:50 pm

Gee, is she drawing an unspoken contrast between her and potus's growing up in straitened circumstances and the romneys' wealthy douchebaggery?

SorosBot September 4, 2012 at 10:51 pm

Not to mention the contrast by staying they earned their money without cheating.

Terry September 4, 2012 at 10:56 pm

I loved that part. No cutting corners.

NellCote71 September 4, 2012 at 11:45 pm

And, gee, not getting through Harvard law on their parents' stocks. Oh, that's right. She who just LOVES us women didn't go to Harvard law. Did she even graduate?

johnnyzhivago September 4, 2012 at 10:50 pm

The truth counts – unless you're a Republican!

IonaTrailer September 4, 2012 at 10:50 pm

"Being President doesn't CHANGE who you are, it REVEALS who you are".

XOXOXOX

Arborista September 4, 2012 at 11:33 pm

That line & the line about how you can't accept help to achieve success & then slam the door behind you- those were my faves!

NellCote71 September 4, 2012 at 11:46 pm

Second bumper sticker after the one about a relay.

Barbara_ September 4, 2012 at 10:51 pm

A most awesome Tweet:
Dave Pell ‏@davepell
I like to think that Michelle Obama is the type of wife who would say: "Dude, the dog is riding inside the car."

glasspusher September 4, 2012 at 10:55 pm

Hahahahaha

valgal2342 September 4, 2012 at 11:45 pm

Many many up fists!

NellCote71 September 4, 2012 at 11:47 pm

And sleeping ON the bed.

Steverino247 September 4, 2012 at 11:50 pm

That's where my bitches sleep.

(And yes, I'm talking about female dogs)

BigSkullF*ckingDog September 4, 2012 at 10:51 pm

Muslin! I just saw a muslin, y'all!

TribecaMike September 4, 2012 at 11:01 pm

Muslins are part of the fabric of this country.

finallyhappy September 4, 2012 at 11:02 pm

I just saw orthodox Jews- I saw the Muslins much earlier

Designer_Rants September 5, 2012 at 12:01 am

I saw one of them Sikhs, y'all.

Whose got the Big Tent?

deanbooth September 4, 2012 at 11:05 pm

You should email Peggyton.

Arborista September 4, 2012 at 11:31 pm

But not Michele Bachmann…

NellCote71 September 4, 2012 at 11:48 pm

Dame Noonington would be so atwitter. Two sightings of brown people within the week?

Negropolis September 4, 2012 at 10:52 pm

I'm going to brave a GOP rally and yell: Truth or GTFO!

fuflans September 4, 2012 at 10:52 pm

this is a fantastic case she's making for everything the dem's stand for and need to run on in this election.

too bad she's not white.

(wish i was snarking).

NellCote71 September 4, 2012 at 11:49 pm

Dat SO true. I know what you are saying.

EdFlintstone September 4, 2012 at 10:53 pm

What about those American families that only have 1 or 2 dressage horses, Mitt and Ann feel their pain!

NellCote71 September 4, 2012 at 11:54 pm

Are there people really that poor?

True story. My son a long time ago dated a very wealthy young woman. It's Texas, so it's oil. During one of the many downturns in the O&G industry, her father was bemoaning the fact that they could take only one private plane hunting. My son innocently asked why the guy needed two planes. The other plane was for the hunting dogs.

Lucidamente1 September 4, 2012 at 10:53 pm

When does she start yelling "whitey?"

iburl September 4, 2012 at 10:57 pm

Today I listened to Rush Limbaugh in my car after lunch and he passed on a rumor that Rev. Wright was going to do the benediction tonight. So, it'll probably be after Michele.

NellCote71 September 4, 2012 at 11:55 pm

"today I listened to to Rush Limbaugh. . . .". Do we see where we made our mistake?

miss_grundy September 5, 2012 at 12:05 am

Did you upchuck your lunch in the car? By the way, are you a masochist?????

BoatOfVelociraptors September 5, 2012 at 11:09 am

Nah. Just on a diet.

Veritas78 September 4, 2012 at 11:42 pm

Tomorrow night she starts with 40ozers and by midnight we're all covered in gang tats.

TribecaMike September 4, 2012 at 10:54 pm

"Show us the blankey!" — Jerome Corsi

Mondo_Cane September 4, 2012 at 10:55 pm

I believe she just eviscerated Mittens – what a job!

HouseOfTheBlueLights September 4, 2012 at 10:55 pm

When do we get the surprise cameo from Barry?

BarackMyWorld September 4, 2012 at 10:55 pm

Suck it, Mittens.

NellCote71 September 4, 2012 at 11:58 pm

Oh, yeah. Too bad they don't realize they have been blown out of the water. I only wish the Repugs would watch both conventions as I have done. How can any decent, honest human being vote for such a bunch of lying hypocrites?

fuflans September 4, 2012 at 10:55 pm

slamming the door on opportunity after you've made it…

community organizing…

rock on michelle.

IonaTrailer September 4, 2012 at 10:56 pm

SOUTH-SIDE OF CHICAGO REPRESENT!!!!
(103rd and Michigan)

Mondo_Cane September 4, 2012 at 10:57 pm

what was the yell from the crowd?

BarackMyWorld September 4, 2012 at 10:58 pm

I suspect the crowd's "4 more years" spontaneous chant was masking something sinister.

Designer_Rants September 4, 2012 at 11:06 pm

Like a hot mic-ed fart from Biden?

SorosBot September 4, 2012 at 10:57 pm

"Success isn't about how much money you make" – take that, Romney greedheads.

Geminisunmars September 5, 2012 at 12:26 am

That had me cheering!!!

BarackMyWorld September 4, 2012 at 10:57 pm

Four more beers!

Joshua Norton September 4, 2012 at 10:58 pm

Any bets that the pundrity will be talking about the FLOTUS' "angry" and "militant" speech tomorrow?

Just a suspicion.

Arborista September 4, 2012 at 11:27 pm

Just let 'em try & I'll show them what angry & militant looks like. (No, I don't really hang out what the pundit crowd…)

Guppy September 4, 2012 at 10:58 pm

How many fuckin' signs are these people expected to have on hand?

Is that one of the qualifications to be a delegate or something?

Designer_Rants September 4, 2012 at 11:05 pm

I'd say they should have "Swiss Army" signs, but that's kindofa touchy nationality this season.

Arborista September 4, 2012 at 11:26 pm

The marshalls distribute them on an as needed basis…

Terry September 4, 2012 at 10:58 pm

Funny, I haven't seen a tinfoil hat in the crowd yet.

finallyhappy September 4, 2012 at 11:03 pm

I just saw a Peter Pan hat on some guy- what was that??

Arborista September 4, 2012 at 11:24 pm

I figured it was a Robin Hood hat, but wasn't sure if that was an economic statement or if it was a 'Merry Men' statement?

TribecaMike September 4, 2012 at 10:58 pm

Have the Ron Paul delegates noisily walked out yet?

vodkamuppet September 4, 2012 at 10:58 pm

There's something about this crowd tonight that's different from the RNC…. I don't know, they look so, American.

NellCote71 September 4, 2012 at 11:59 pm

I know. How strange.

fuflans September 4, 2012 at 10:59 pm

took a while, but they finally got the right chant down and in unison.

kinda a metaphor for the dems in general.

Terry September 4, 2012 at 10:59 pm

We all love our country! How refreshing!

FakaktaSouth September 4, 2012 at 10:59 pm

I wish he would stop looking for the best in some of these people, I truly do. He's GOT to do some neck stomping. GOT TO. We need policy, not a bunch of people happy they all feel like they got their way.

rickmaci September 5, 2012 at 12:22 am

I want him out there chewing up the opposition like some monster hungry great white shark. Ooops, you know what I mean.

iburl September 4, 2012 at 10:59 pm

Forward with patience, wisdom, courage and grace.

Negropolis September 4, 2012 at 10:59 pm

Dems really need to work on their chants. lol

Terry September 4, 2012 at 11:02 pm

Yes, but there is something to be said about not being lock stepped drones.

NellCote71 September 5, 2012 at 12:02 am

Exactly. During the "others" convention, I figured they had held some sort of cheer leading camp prior to.

I love our ragtag laid-blackness.

Negropolis September 4, 2012 at 11:03 pm

lol! We just had a "USA! USA!" and "Yes we can!" going simultaneously.

RadioBowels September 4, 2012 at 11:07 pm

Like Jesse said, at least we weren't assaulted with "you didn't build this" ad nauseum.

Mondo_Cane September 4, 2012 at 10:59 pm

I wonder where Romney will buy this kind of sincerity –

Designer_Rants September 4, 2012 at 11:01 pm

He will have American workers train Chinese workers to manufacture sincerity before shipping the Sincerity Factory overseas.

Guppy September 4, 2012 at 11:02 pm

He has people for that.

NellCote71 September 5, 2012 at 12:04 am

Software upgrade. Romney Vista.

tessiee September 5, 2012 at 2:06 am

Is that the version that comes with the Sincerity Simulator [tm]?

SorosBot September 4, 2012 at 11:00 pm

He'll never give up, he'll stay till the fight's won; GI Barack is there!

kittensdontlie September 4, 2012 at 11:01 pm

Our President was poor and owned a rusty car. I bet he made his own Cheetos back then, just like he brews his own beer now.

fuflans September 4, 2012 at 11:01 pm

i say michelle has earned a fat greasy cheeseburger.

fuflans September 4, 2012 at 11:02 pm

whoa! blacksmith reference!

Lucidamente1 September 4, 2012 at 11:02 pm

"Win independence from an empire." Anti-colonial rhetoric!

iburl September 4, 2012 at 11:08 pm

Even the founders of the Democratic party like Jefferson had a small streak of Mao-Mao Anti-Colonialism in them, according to my Professor Gingrich Books-On-Tape.

RadioBowels September 4, 2012 at 11:02 pm

I have a piloerection!

DrunkIrishman September 4, 2012 at 11:02 pm

Maybe we elected the wrong Obama…

Guppy September 4, 2012 at 11:06 pm

They can pull a Clinton-style switcheroo in a few years.

NellCote71 September 5, 2012 at 12:04 am

Fine with me.

coolhandnuke September 4, 2012 at 11:02 pm

An extremely wise and astute oration, that needs nary a mention of the Romneys or the Bushes–who in contrast to an amazing wife's love letter to her husband–are the antithesis of this incredibly lovable first family.

RadioBowels September 4, 2012 at 11:05 pm

This clearly was a militant, angry attack on the Romneys.

NellCote71 September 5, 2012 at 12:05 am

And bitter class envy.

Wadisay September 4, 2012 at 11:03 pm

Damn, Shelly is good!

C_R_Eature September 4, 2012 at 11:03 pm

Mom-In-Chief!

Veritas78 September 4, 2012 at 11:43 pm

The wingers are going to hate that! "She ain't my Mom! She got teefus!"

C_R_Eature September 4, 2012 at 11:55 pm

Good.

Guppy September 4, 2012 at 11:04 pm

Those cheekbones…

NellCote71 September 5, 2012 at 12:06 am

Those biceps and triceps. . .

vodkamuppet September 4, 2012 at 11:04 pm

All that enthusiasm I haven't been feeling the last few months? Yeah, I'm feeling it.

NellCote71 September 5, 2012 at 12:06 am

Amen. Aaa-menn.

Arborista September 5, 2012 at 1:54 am

I know, right? How come we only get fed every 4 years?

IonaTrailer September 4, 2012 at 11:04 pm

MOUNTAIN TOP!!!!
I love you Michelle! (Hyde Park representing!!!)

The difference between Mrs. Obama and Mrs. Romney, is that one is real and one is rich and disconnected.

NellCote71 September 5, 2012 at 12:09 am

You can see and feel sincerity if you are even halfway sentient human. My dog would growl at Ann; she would roll over and want her belly rubbed by Michelle.

finallyhappy September 5, 2012 at 6:48 am

shit- I wrote that to a local reporter looking for reaction- but last night before I saw your comment.

Guppy September 4, 2012 at 11:04 pm

And not once has anybody said his middle name.

gullywompr September 4, 2012 at 11:04 pm

And that's how we do that.

Terry September 4, 2012 at 11:05 pm

That was a frickin barnburner of a speech

Negropolis September 4, 2012 at 11:05 pm

Out. Of. The. Park.

kittensdontlie September 4, 2012 at 11:06 pm

All over America, millions are tearing up….

NellCote71 September 5, 2012 at 12:10 am

I am.

Doktor Zoom September 4, 2012 at 11:08 pm

And out onto the street (though not Waveland Ave, because Barry's a Sox fan)

Negropolis September 4, 2012 at 11:08 pm

This was the speech of a lifetime.

Mondo_Cane September 4, 2012 at 11:05 pm

applause!

HouseOfTheBlueLights September 4, 2012 at 11:05 pm

You don't really need to humanize Barack, because he's already a human.

Designer_Rants September 4, 2012 at 11:42 pm

AHHRGGHGLE LURRRVES YOUZ WUMMINZ1

NellCote71 September 5, 2012 at 12:10 am

Best imitation EVAH.

Designer_Rants September 5, 2012 at 12:17 am

Each time I write Ann's words, they sound more drunkenly desperate in my head. Then I think about what the Repig convention platform is and wonder why they (half the country) all have brain damage.

FakaktaSouth September 4, 2012 at 11:06 pm

Excellent, excellent job. Michelle Obama actually does that thing, where I feel proud to be a lady here. That does not happen a whole bunch, but, right now, I feel really happy. Nice.

gullywompr September 4, 2012 at 11:07 pm

For whatever it's worth, I'm happy you're a lady too.

ElPinche September 4, 2012 at 11:29 pm

I usually dont' stand up and whoo and clap at my TV screen like a crazy person, but I did after her speech. Wife: "Are you crying??" Me: "…..No!…."

NellCote71 September 5, 2012 at 12:11 am

I hope she loves you for that.

Zango Crudmonger September 4, 2012 at 11:06 pm

Even Maddow is giving up the "Oh my god" for Michelle.

Designer_Rants September 5, 2012 at 12:19 am

I'm a big fan of your avatar, and all things Little Face Mitt.

ElPinche September 5, 2012 at 1:25 am

I love Little Face Mitt!!

Veritas78 September 4, 2012 at 11:06 pm

That might be the best speech I've ever heard.

SorosBot September 4, 2012 at 11:06 pm

And that was an awesome speech; helped wash out the bad taste all the hate and fear on display last week.

Come here a minute September 4, 2012 at 11:06 pm

Holy shit. I just switched the radio to C-SPAN after the Nationals beat the Cubs, and Michelle Obama hit it out of the fucking park.

ElPinche September 4, 2012 at 11:27 pm

Even Wolfie on CNN said she hit a "grand slam." He usually saves his sports analogies for the war room.

fuflans September 4, 2012 at 11:07 pm

also: republicans can't touch our signs.

C_R_Eature September 4, 2012 at 11:09 pm

They were all spell checked by teachers.

Arborista September 4, 2012 at 11:19 pm

Unfortunately, probably unemployed teachers…

TribecaMike September 4, 2012 at 11:07 pm

Not that I care, but David Brooks calling it "a genius of a speech."

vodkamuppet September 4, 2012 at 11:16 pm

Yeah, but with a but….

C_R_Eature September 4, 2012 at 11:18 pm

Really? did Mark Shields slip something in his coffee?

Blueb4sinrise September 4, 2012 at 11:07 pm

I'm tearing -up just reading all y'alls comments.

Okay, maybe it's the salsa.

NellCote71 September 5, 2012 at 12:14 am

For me salsa and wine. Screw Dukan diet. This is OUR time.

ChernobylSoup September 4, 2012 at 11:07 pm

When Michelle and Barack first got together it must have been a close thing the cosmos didn't go kablooie from the overpowering awesomeness.

Jukesgrrl September 4, 2012 at 11:53 pm

And the National Examiner persists in claiming they're on the verge of divorce. (When they're not claiming Bat Boy is their son.) Seriously, people have to read that headline while they're standing in line at the supermarket.

NellCote71 September 5, 2012 at 12:16 am

I do. I have. Funny, too. I am sure the Repugs have spent millions of dollars on trying to find dirt on either one or both. Have to hand it to the Enquirer, though, for the Edwards thing.

Guppy September 4, 2012 at 11:07 pm

DNC has better-looking Christians.

C_R_Eature September 4, 2012 at 11:08 pm

DNC has better Christians.

NellCote71 September 5, 2012 at 12:20 am

Do you mean like real Christians, those who respect and acknowledge other people's religion, those who don't cram their own religion down other people's throat?

UW8316154 September 4, 2012 at 11:12 pm

DNC is better-looking.

Jukesgrrl September 4, 2012 at 11:54 pm

Less creepy-looking Veterans of Foreign Wars, too.

BTWBFDIMHO September 4, 2012 at 11:07 pm

Are you better-off than one hour ago?

Jukesgrrl September 4, 2012 at 11:54 pm

Yes, in fact I am. I startin' to feel hopey and changey again.

C_R_Eature September 4, 2012 at 11:57 pm

Now that you mention it…. yes.

iTuna September 4, 2012 at 11:08 pm

Every one of those delegates is gonna get so very laid tonight.

Jukesgrrl September 4, 2012 at 11:55 pm

There's already a line to do the Castro brothers.

NellCote71 September 5, 2012 at 12:21 am

Me first. From Texas. Have lived in San Antonio. Ergo.

Jukesgrrl September 5, 2012 at 1:49 am

Democrats always make persuasive arguments.Feel free to cut in.

Lucidamente1 September 4, 2012 at 11:08 pm

Lawrence O'Donnell looks like he just came in his pants.

ProgressiveInga September 4, 2012 at 11:11 pm

Gross, but upfisted…..

I feel dirty.

vodkamuppet September 4, 2012 at 11:08 pm

Ok, where's Ken Layne to bring us all back down from that?

Designer_Rants September 4, 2012 at 11:23 pm

Drones and War On Drugs and Empty Houses Yet Homeless People.

Did that fix your Ken Layne itch?

Veritas78 September 4, 2012 at 11:49 pm

None of it matters because of the Mayan calendar.

vodkamuppet September 5, 2012 at 12:02 am

Yeah, that did it. Sigh.

not that Dewey September 5, 2012 at 12:02 am

"exurban big-box sprawl wasteland nightmare"

Lionel[redacted]Esq September 4, 2012 at 11:08 pm

Somewhere, Michelle Malkin just had a coronary.

iburl September 4, 2012 at 11:11 pm

Can the heartless have those?

Lionel[redacted]Esq September 4, 2012 at 11:31 pm

I am so sure you are right that I will petition the Internet Authority to have my comment removed from the web.

NellCote71 September 5, 2012 at 12:22 am

Hello. Cheney.

ElPinche September 4, 2012 at 11:25 pm

Don't tease me…you set off a couple of my google alerts.

Terry September 4, 2012 at 11:09 pm

Loved the tears in her eyes. A great, genuine speech.

SorosBot September 4, 2012 at 11:09 pm

Prayers; boring and pointless. We don't need this.

finallyhappy September 4, 2012 at 11:13 pm

Not on PBS-went to the commentators

Designer_Rants September 4, 2012 at 11:16 pm

Yep. Brooks made himself say nice things about Michelle.

glasspusher September 4, 2012 at 11:13 pm

I'm with you on that. It's nice to see some folks use their faith as a vehicle of love and friendship. Religion, though, is neither a prerequisite for nor a guarantee of morality. :/

SorosBot September 4, 2012 at 11:16 pm

And pushing faith as a virtue and doubt as a vice always pisses me off, even from a Dem. Well at least the prayer-giving lady was cute.

glasspusher September 4, 2012 at 11:21 pm

I save my faith for the Red Sox. I use my doubt as a tool for my own humility and as a bullshit detector. I know how you feel.

IonaTrailer September 4, 2012 at 11:15 pm

Dude, love, peace, …… psychedelics even.

or a har-de-har-har, nod and a wink….if you know what I mean

CthuNHu September 4, 2012 at 11:27 pm

Well, just like Obama's Medicare changes, it's NOT FOR YOU.

It's for the inoculation of less political, less enlightened — but no less American — folks who watched both conventions to try to figure out this election, against their dumbass cousins' and fathers-in-law's hooting that Obama and all the Democrats are anti-Christian and don't even allow anyone to say "God" in public any more.

I don't find your lack of faith disturbing. I am, though, glad that the DNC knows better than to share your estimate of the utility of prayer.

fuflans September 4, 2012 at 11:09 pm

goosebumps, tears

barry better be bringing his A game.

NellCote71 September 5, 2012 at 12:24 am

You just know he will. And then, on to the debates.

IonaTrailer September 4, 2012 at 11:09 pm

WORK! WORK! WORK!
Be chatting up every one you know.

CthuNHu September 4, 2012 at 11:10 pm

Wow. How does the benedictress do that constant simultaneous talking and smiling thing? Pageant training?

MissTaken September 4, 2012 at 11:10 pm

Michelle Obama 2016

SorosBot September 4, 2012 at 11:14 pm

I'd love to see her pull a Clinton and run for Senate when Barack's term is up.

redarmyzombie September 4, 2012 at 11:17 pm

HELL YEAH!!!

ElPinche September 4, 2012 at 11:25 pm

Oh hells yes.

fuflans September 4, 2012 at 11:12 pm

well done dems. keep it up.

Wadisay September 4, 2012 at 11:12 pm

Ann Romney and her tuna fish: compare and contrast.

Barrelhse September 5, 2012 at 12:04 am

Low blow, although you're probably right about Ann.

Veritas78 September 4, 2012 at 11:13 pm

Now, if only she looked like a First Lady…

redarmyzombie September 4, 2012 at 11:13 pm

HA!

Suck on that, Romney-Whores!
(God, I love our FLOTUS…)

EDIT: Aaaand my pants seem to have mysteriously disappeared…

Designer_Rants September 4, 2012 at 11:14 pm

Alright, Birther Media. Have fun goin' back to your roach-and-used-needles motels.

TribecaMike September 4, 2012 at 11:21 pm

That's my fave comment of the night.

Designer_Rants September 4, 2012 at 11:32 pm

Aw, thanks Mike.

coolhandnuke September 4, 2012 at 11:15 pm

Is there any doubt Michelle Obama wrote that beautiful speech?
She nailed it.
She built it

MissTaken September 4, 2012 at 11:16 pm

I think Chuck Todd has a bit of a crush on our FLOTUS.

C_R_Eature September 4, 2012 at 11:19 pm

That's why he's only on camera from the waist up.

SorosBot September 4, 2012 at 11:20 pm

What straight man, or gay woman, doesn't?

redarmyzombie September 4, 2012 at 11:21 pm

Hell, I'M gay, and I love the woman!

finallyhappy September 5, 2012 at 6:53 am

I'm Straight and I love her- I got to wave to her once as she returned to the WH from donating her inaugural gown to the Smithsonian but as it was through tinted glass- she couldn't see how I am her biggest fan with tears in my eyes- just because she was being driven past me

iburl September 4, 2012 at 11:17 pm

She forgot to screech "I LOVE WOMEN!!!". That's gonna cost them.

SorosBot September 4, 2012 at 11:21 pm

And she forgot to express her disdain and contempt for all the little people.

Jukesgrrl September 4, 2012 at 11:59 pm

Are you speaking of YOU PEOPLE?

C_R_Eature September 4, 2012 at 11:17 pm

I have to say that Michelle Obama's speech was the best political speech I've seen in a very long time. Just brilliant.
It amazes me, even though I know better, that Michelle Obama is the exact polar opposite of the awful meme that the right wing has carefully crafted for her.

Guppy September 4, 2012 at 11:20 pm

Michelle Obama is the exact polar opposite of the awful meme

She's white?

C_R_Eature September 4, 2012 at 11:23 pm

Well, not quite, but she's no New Yorker Magazine cover either.

Jukesgrrl September 5, 2012 at 12:01 am

I thought about that over and over tonight. She's an Angry Black Woman. Riiiiight.

Uniprober September 5, 2012 at 1:28 am

Patience, young Jedi…

Wadisay September 4, 2012 at 11:17 pm

Rachael Maddow says now the right wing media is going to have to back off Michelle Obama. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Maybe pigs will come a-flyin' out of their arses.

Veritas78 September 4, 2012 at 11:19 pm

Compare and contrast: the lovin' Michelle and Ann will be gettin' tonight.

iTuna September 4, 2012 at 11:25 pm

Sadly, President Obama is in DC this evening. http://www.politico.com/politico44/2012/09/obama-

predilectrix September 4, 2012 at 11:35 pm

The kids these days have some ways around that.

miss_grundy September 5, 2012 at 12:15 am

I'm sure he gave her an "I love you, honey and thanks for a great job" phone call. And maybe some kisses over the phone too!

NellCote71 September 5, 2012 at 12:21 am

You know. What goes around, does come around?

SorosBot September 4, 2012 at 11:19 pm

I've just switched on an MSNBC feed; Chris Matthews sounds like he wants to gay marry Julian Castro.

TribecaMike September 4, 2012 at 11:19 pm

Even Chris Matthews can't buzz kill this evening.

gullywompr September 4, 2012 at 11:21 pm

Sure, sure, all you KoolAid drinkers… but how does this affect Sarah Palin?

Arborista September 5, 2012 at 12:56 am

Who?

Guppy September 5, 2012 at 8:49 am

Ann Romney still loves her.

ElPinche September 4, 2012 at 11:23 pm

OMG….I love Michelle Obama. That last time I cried like that was when Spock "died" in Wrath of Khan.

Barbara_ September 4, 2012 at 11:26 pm

"The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few."

ElPinche September 4, 2012 at 11:34 pm

Barbara…don't get me started. Then I think of the kirk and spock doing the vulcan sign on the glass. Ok Here I go.

Barbara_ September 5, 2012 at 12:32 am

Come to mommy. I will hold you until the awfulness goes away.

DemmeFatale September 5, 2012 at 1:23 am

What always gets me is how Spock straightens and pulls down his jacket when he stands up.
(Sorry.)

ElPinche September 5, 2012 at 1:24 am

It's a vulcan thing.

MosesInvests September 5, 2012 at 4:20 am

"I have been, and always shall be, your friend."

finallyhappy September 5, 2012 at 6:55 am

Don't forget(I had it up here for a day once)- my facebook photo is me and Nimoy. Because like Sarah Palin, this thread should be about me- and Nimoy

MissTaken September 4, 2012 at 11:25 pm

Dumpster dived toaster kicks empty chair's ass

Barbara_ September 5, 2012 at 12:33 am

Ann Romney dumpster dives at restaurants, looking for receipts for tax deductions.

C_R_Eature September 4, 2012 at 11:25 pm

Okay, it's 11:23 EDT. Which of the Wonkette editorial staff was the first to throw up?

Joshua Norton September 4, 2012 at 11:26 pm

Michelle vs. Ann

We The People vs. "You People"

ElPinche September 4, 2012 at 11:31 pm

Brilliant!

ChessieNefercat September 4, 2012 at 11:33 pm

Ooh, that's got to go on bumper stickers.

TribecaMike September 4, 2012 at 11:27 pm

Spare us you and Arianna's pillow talk, Fineman.

MissTaken September 4, 2012 at 11:27 pm

what a buzzkill.

Designer_Rants September 4, 2012 at 11:28 pm

Nate Silver's numbers just keep looking more awesome. Is this dude just getting our hopes up?
http://fivethirtyeight.blogs.nytimes.com/

gullywompr September 4, 2012 at 11:30 pm

Numbers have a liberal bias.

TribecaMike September 4, 2012 at 11:30 pm

Uh oh, Mitt.

Negropolis September 4, 2012 at 11:29 pm

Shorter DNC: People are people, too, my friend.

ProgressiveInga September 4, 2012 at 11:29 pm

The only remaining question is:
Will FLOTUS' speech tonight have higher ratings than Honey Boo-Boo?

mrblifil September 4, 2012 at 11:31 pm

Luke Russert: Pure class

Luke RussertVerified
‏@LukeRussert

Mrs. #Obama getting teary eyed talking about opportunity for children. Something she has in common with Boehner.

Blueb4sinrise September 4, 2012 at 11:37 pm

Yes, Boehner will weep again when Nancy takes back the goddam gavel.

edit: Luke sucks ass. Also.

TribecaMike September 4, 2012 at 11:49 pm

I had to look up who this Luke Russert person is. A very impressive resume of never having had a real job in his life.

Chet Kincaid_ September 4, 2012 at 11:56 pm

Seriously? Is he becoming the "Woody at Cheers" of MSNBC? Because that's fuckin' dumb. The boy's gonna get an easy-to-parody reputation if somebody doesn't buy him a clue.

Jukesgrrl September 5, 2012 at 1:38 am

They finally bought him a haircut … what else d'ya want?

SorosBot September 4, 2012 at 11:37 pm

Michael Steele is praising Michelle Obama's speech; he's going off script and being honest again.

Designer_Rants September 4, 2012 at 11:40 pm

He was a real sad sack on Jon Stewart last week. I almost felt sorry for him. He also bragged about his awesome success for the American Fascism Party before he got shitcanned.

Negropolis September 4, 2012 at 11:41 pm

They were also both fapping over how Michelle looked, too, which isn't bad except that they are on national television doing it and looked like dirty, old men.

TribecaMike September 4, 2012 at 11:39 pm

Remind me again, Matthews, why do you have Michael Steele on during both conventions?

Oh, and thanks Jesse!

coolhandnuke September 4, 2012 at 11:52 pm

If tonite's speeches/presentations represented a theme from the Left that we are a diverse loving family, communites within the community of this Country…then I hope tomorrow night they go on full attack–with a spine–and showcase the Right as a vindictive, fearful, divisive, hate-filled Gated Community.

TribecaMike September 4, 2012 at 11:54 pm

MSNBC's pundit panel is boring without that crazy mick Buchanan.

Jukesgrrl September 5, 2012 at 12:05 am

They're all afraid to talk about the thrill they had up their legs.

Steverino247 September 4, 2012 at 11:57 pm

I've been present at some great political speeches, but the First Lady's speech tonight was the best I've ever heard. It didn't just define her husband, but defined what Americans should aspire to be. It reminded us of what we should do for each other in troubled times and inspired us to go do it. That's why it's a great speech. This is what leaders do. Not just tell you what needs to be done and order you to do it, but inspire you to do it, no matter what the cost. Just wonderful!

JohnnyQuick September 5, 2012 at 12:02 am

1000% Agreement. IT WAS THE FUCKING GREATEST!!!

I now want to start a Michelle Obama religion, maybe more like one of them Buddhist type deals where you can still be religious or atheist and join.

It will be explicitly say that she is not divine. Just that she can talk about people coming together, or her own life story, and make you FEEL divine.

I'm only slightly exaggerating… Fuck! I'm not even exaggerating.

NellCote71 September 5, 2012 at 12:00 am

Chuckle.

Jukesgrrl September 5, 2012 at 12:04 am

Where were the people with the muskets and the tri-cornered hats? I thought they were the REAL Amurrica. Shouldn't they have been their applauding OUR First Lady?

redarmyzombie September 5, 2012 at 12:10 am

They were too busy over in Amercia.

MilwaukeeKent September 5, 2012 at 12:19 am

No surprise, since they're Morans who should get a brain!

Jukesgrrl September 5, 2012 at 1:39 am

I LOVE that picture with all my heart.

mustangsavvy September 5, 2012 at 12:05 am

Ted Strickland is pissed off and he doesn't care who knows it!

Seriously folks – Michele Obama is the wind beneath Barack's wings! I love this woman. Outstanding speech, fucking nailed it.

gullywompr September 5, 2012 at 12:06 am

Does Debbie Wasserman-Schultz look great tonight or what?

rickmaci September 5, 2012 at 12:17 am

Lightened the hair, lost some weight, great makeup. Fapfapfapfap.

Chet Kincaid_ September 5, 2012 at 12:06 am

WHOA, what happened to Debbie Wasserman Schultz?! Is she trying to make Allen West explode with conflicted disdain and attraction?

Toomush_Infer September 5, 2012 at 12:09 am

Okay, when Michelle Obama walked off stage, I….uh….I….what was I saying again?…

MilwaukeeKent September 5, 2012 at 12:10 am

Once again, the GOP has succeeded in their evil scheme of making the Democratic Party seem inclusive, aspirational and fun.

Biff September 5, 2012 at 12:15 am

I didn't get to watch too much, was outside working after the sun went down due to ungodly hot here in the desert, but I managed to listen on c-span radio. I just wanted to say that I've never been more in love with FLOTUS than I am tonight. What a fine speech, what a fine woman…

TribecaMike September 5, 2012 at 12:19 am

Christine Quinn on MSNBC to tell us what Bloomberg is thinking.

gellotto September 5, 2012 at 12:22 am

yes wonkette michelle did stop time. now please mrs flotus stop making men weep. its just bad form.

rickmaci September 5, 2012 at 12:38 am

Damn, can't wait to hear the Big Dog. Table was really set tonight.

LibertyLover September 5, 2012 at 10:14 am

I'd still vote for him again.

punkneverdies September 5, 2012 at 1:34 am

oh and just to double post, i don't want to comb through 8 pages to find out if anyone pointed out that ledbetter is from alabama, and YES there is a BIG. DIFFERENCE.

finallyhappy September 5, 2012 at 6:58 am

No, people said she was from Texas and had a Texas accent. You know, you southerners all sound alike to us east coast liberal elitists. I think Texas has dentists- is that the difference?

HouseOfTheBlueLights September 5, 2012 at 9:53 am

When I heard the remarks about her Texas accent I could hear the heads exploding in Alabama all the way up here in Illinois.

TribecaMike September 5, 2012 at 1:37 am

Gen. JC Christian, Patriot compiles moronic scumbag comments from Glenn Beck's "Blaze" about Ms. Obama's speech so you don't have to… http://patriotboy.blogspot.com/2012/09/patriots-e

sullivanst September 5, 2012 at 9:18 am

It's so funny to me to watch the Republican base embrace colonialism as a thing simply because they heard Obama was against it. Also fucking scary.

amoosefloats September 5, 2012 at 1:54 am

I really hope the DNC brings Betty White in to rant at a empty bain capital boardroom chair.

Doktor Zoom September 5, 2012 at 2:37 am

Meanwhile, the folks over at Free Republic are (again) busy making plans for a new civil war. It will start when The Blacks riot out of control after their Food Stamps EBT cards stop working. (yes, yes, we know that 70% of food stamp recipients are white)…

May or may not do a full post on this. Right now, just noting it because the stupid is so intense.

C_R_Eature September 5, 2012 at 5:38 am

We will have to Savagely Mock these people eventually. Why not now?

cheetojeebus September 5, 2012 at 6:44 am

Why am I thinking of Manson now? oh right, 'cuase that loon thought the same sort of stuff.

C_R_Eature September 5, 2012 at 6:51 am

Uh huh. Not only that, he was looking forward to it. Just like these people.

finallyhappy September 5, 2012 at 7:00 am

Don't need a war- let's pick a place for them where they "can do it themselves" w/o gov't help. In 2 months or less- they will become the Road.

James Michael Curley September 5, 2012 at 9:49 am

After reading most of that crap I recommend that the writing you do start with "Dear FBI Director Mueller:"

SayItWithWookies September 5, 2012 at 2:40 am

Holy crap — I just watched Michelle's speech here and I have to say — I don't envy that Barack Obama fella who has to follow that act. Holy shit — last week Ann was all "we were so poor we ate on an ironing board that stood on two piles of blue-chip stocks," and today Michelle's all My husband and me were poor because we thought shit was wrong and were trying to fix it."

Last week it was all "Ha ha, you people have had the wheel long enough — now give it to us and get in the back seat where you belong. That cliff is getting away." And just now Michelle was all Jimmy Stewart and Cesar Chavez giving a sunrise sermon about the greatness of America and it's not even a paean to the avaricious, coal-hoarding, padlock-the-exits stingy fuckin' sweatshop slumlords who cost this country a fuckin' arm and a leg — it's about the fuckin' dignity of the fuckin' American citizen trying to make life better for his children.

And holy shit, that's so much better than checking off a bunch of rhetorical highlights. Michelle got at the reasons America was made by the American people — and why that's best when it includes all of us.

Terry September 5, 2012 at 7:38 am

Tomorrow night, it's Big Dog. Bill Clinton speaks.

Negropolis September 5, 2012 at 8:29 am

I thought tonight was Bill's night?

Terry September 5, 2012 at 8:40 am

Yes, I'm tired from staying up late watching the convention and was still thinking in the mindset of last night. I meant to say Next, it's Big Dog.

I'm going to need a nap after work. lol

Peckerwood_Pete September 5, 2012 at 9:14 am

And just when I thought the 2 party dinosaur system was becoming irrelevant…… 9:22 PM changed my entire worldview.

#2legit2quit

BaldarTFlagass September 5, 2012 at 9:27 am

Well, I was all wrapped up in a Kurt Wallander book last night and never managed to turn on the TV, but I'm glad to hear the mayor wowed the crowd.

James Michael Curley September 5, 2012 at 9:30 am

I watched from 6:00 until closing on C-Span. Ms Curley has seen a piece about Ryan Case earlier discussing his family's inability to afford health care. It should be hammered home and not just suggested. Ann Romney promoted her battle with MS. Ryan Case's mother died from it. Ms. Romney got all the health care she could and a horse. Ms. Case could not afford the drugs needed to prolong her life.

Biff September 5, 2012 at 10:00 am

I assume, by sheer lack of comments(imperical non-data?), that this was a satisfying opening night?

James Michael Curley September 5, 2012 at 10:21 am

Well the rain started after I got in the house. I had an Italian Sub from Jersey Mike's. The cat didn't miss the litter box, so what more can you ask for?

widestanceromance September 5, 2012 at 10:09 am

I've been in such a funk lately, I've barely even lurked here for days, let alone mustered enough snark to comment. BUT, after hearing Michelle's speech last night, I experienced actual human emotions again. I was wowed, and am goose-bumply all over just thinking about it.

How do we get her on the ticket for 2016?

LibertyLover September 5, 2012 at 10:18 am

Wouldn't that be cool? She'd be a good President.

widestanceromance September 5, 2012 at 10:23 am

She has studied under the best after all (yay, I got my snark back!).

Barrelhse September 5, 2012 at 10:15 am

Exciting! Reading around the internet it seems like all glowing reviews for MichelLe and the whole tone of the convention- quite different from the usual ho-hum "where's the beef?," and hopefully energizing for the apathetic voters out there.
Go Dems!!! May the People overpower the Money Machine.

BaldarTFlagass September 5, 2012 at 10:27 am

The important thing is, will our balloon drop be better than theirs?

DahBoner September 5, 2012 at 10:59 am

Which one was Vaggatarian Boo Boo?

FlownOver September 4, 2012 at 9:37 pm

and deregulated rat feces.

tessiee September 5, 2012 at 1:40 am

The Former Mr. Tessie used to say he wished they would sell adult men's clothes with tags to match them, like Grrrr-animals kids clothing.

shelwood46 September 5, 2012 at 2:08 am

My ex is color blind, and I often sincerely wished that was an option for him.

Arborista September 5, 2012 at 2:53 am

I think we have a winner, ladies and germs…

Texan_Bulldog September 7, 2012 at 11:58 am

We kill 'em all, SullivanSt: women, brown people, white people, black people, mentally disabled. We are equal opportunity when it comes to the death penalty.

sullivanst September 7, 2012 at 12:57 pm

Well, not exactly equal, but yes, you do have a point there.

Of course, Jan Brewer hates women too, at least if her judicial appointments are any indication.

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