Dateline, Tampa Hyatt Lobby Bar — David S. Bernstein, of the Boston Phoenix, just sat his ass down and made his FIRST mistake: telling your Wonkette he had found an exclusive. Then he made his second mistake, which was … something else, whatever. Did you know David S. Bernstein does not know how to embed youtube videos? Good job, old media! Anyhoo, here is David S. Bernstein’s EXCLUSIVE video, which we fucking helped him put on the Internet, because frankly we are lovely. It is about Special Ops dudes who are SO MAD that Barack Obama bows to everyone, all the time, forever, because he is a huge pussy who wants to sell America to Sharia law and Osamabinladensayswhat? Oh right nothing, the fish ate his mouth! See the anger and the glory, where it says “read more”!
Honestly, we kind of agree: sometimes Barry Bamz’s bows do get a little too deep. Like the one in the picture at the top of this post, where he is selling out the entire planet to Zorubi, Boy King of Betelgeuse 3. Sorry everybody, there is no hiding from Betelgeuse 3.
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He'll be taking a big bow for sure on November 7th, right after Mitt is rejected.
Sure is starting to look that way, innit?
* Crosses fingers. Please, please, please…
40 points ahead with Latinos and women, 94% ahead with Blacks. I just don't think Romney can win it with just White folks, and Karl Rove is now openly calling for White Democrats to cross the lines and vote for Romney. Sounds pretty fucking desperate to me.
You mean Ron Paul won't be getting the nomination this week?
He would've, if that fucking storm hadn't blowed his blimp away.
Now show Bernstein how to tie a knot in a cherry stem using only his butt.
All these years I've known you, tbogg, and only now do I guess at your talents!
Bernstein INVENTED that shit, muthafucka!
Oh yeah, "Special Operations for America"? So a bunch of special forces personnel put this together? Not a bunch of old, fat, wheezing, chickenhawking, draft dodging moneybags? That's who is exploiting the sacrifice of soldiers for The Marvelous Mormon? How gullible do these fucks think we are?
Actually, the chief douche is out of the service, a birther who other Spec Ops dudes have told to shut the fuck up because it just ain't professional.
This ain't swift boating, not even close – more like "look at me, I'm a big ol' douche" time.
That particular douche doesn't have two nickels to rub together. Smells like Koch sucking money from here.
Looks like he's a state senator from Montana. It's a superPAC, so you know there's some Koch money in there somewhere.
Who gives a shit if they are real SEALS or not? They might as well be talking about public transportation policy. They should call their group "non sequitur against obammy". Their military service has NOTHING to do with anything they are talking about.
Thousands of service men died during the Civil War. This is why public buses need to be painted yellow instead of white. This message brought to you by SPECOP for America.
I think the Dems need to have and ad that shows the general who was involved in the planning of taking down Osama who said that the Pres. knows his stuff. I don't have any respect for crackers who are in the Armed Forces who talk smack about the CiC, who has shown nothing but respect for the members of the Armed Forces and their families. It just shows that these asshats have absolutely no manners or morals, whatsoever.
Livin' la vida SOFA
Have you seen the maroonz at the convention? Because this is totes aimed at them and lemme tellya, they probly believe every word. Hell, they believe everything that comes out of Rush's anus.
Personally, I'm looking forward to the tell all book from the various people who have gone INTO Rush's anus… (Not reading it, just knowing that it's been published…)
So! Into spelunking, eh? (waggles eyebrows meaningfully)
*blush* oh Borg, you do know how to sweet-talk a fella…
You could prolly drive a bus up in there :barf:.
That kid is too cute!
And I am wondering if he ever got his watermelon?
No snark. I love that photo so much.
The tall kid is so too cute too.
"IN A WORLD where the leader of the FREE WORLD can let a small child rub his head for good luck…"
SOFA? That's an unfortunate acronym.
That is where the guys who paid for the ad sat during war time.
he's SOFA King Lame!
Ich bin maroon!
In both hue and intellect. Honestly, I'm astounded at the fact that the whole fucking lot of them haven't popped an artery yet.
No, it's a Frank Zappa reference. Sofa is the name of the song.
I know, I know, I was just exploding last night. So to speak.
Aber bekeckle nicht das Sofa, Sofa.
Roto_Plooker Libel!
COUCHSKIN AMERICAN!
Fuck these cunts.
Oddly enough, this comment is appropriate on 9 out of 10 Wonkette articles…
Obama is bowing, yes. The GOP bends at the waist and grabs their ankles when the likes of the Koch brothers, Sheldon Adelson, Donald Trump, et al. show up.
Bowing to Saudis is a no-no… You gotta hold their hands! That's how they know you're serious on foreign policy…
Actually, they kneel before the Koch Bros. et al. and unzip their zippers and give them blowjobs.
I agree, Miss_Grundy. Thanks!
Poppy Bush said, "If their guy makes a modest bow to a Saudi Tyrant, you kiss a Saudi Tyrant right on the lips. It's the Texass way."
And then you hold his hand on long walks through the rose garden.
Yeah, wasn't it Boy Wonder who kissed that old guy in the dress? Where was there no manliness back then?
When Obama starts curtseying, I might worry a little bit…
That is to say nothing about the dress he would be wearing to execute a proper curtsy.
Alright, I'm taking out the 'conspiracy' and just calling them "Freaks," period.
It's coming to that, innit? They've gone completely batshit, too.
"I'm a draft-dodging elitist pussy who's sons & grandsons will never serve in the military and I approve this message"
Special Operations for America…some rovian fatturds pretending to be Navy Seals?
They can be SPECOPS guys, but that has nothing to do with anything.
Four out of Five Navy Seals prefer Brillo brand scouring pads to store brand pads. Therefore, Brillo Pads are better at Freedom. By this logic.
I don't think (I just went to regular flavored basic training, not SEAL school) that there are a lot of political science or economics classes in SPECOP schools.
If this group had ads like this about brands of ammunition, communications gear, or military tactics, best believe what they say. When they start talking about politics, they are out of their league. (nautical pun!)
Interesting point, thanks.
Just find it weird some real specop guy watches TV and suddenly decides he wants the next Joe the Plumber. Although I guess money can be a pretty big incentive, hard to blame anyone for that…
His father was Romulan. That's where he inherited his anti-Federation world view.
Rebecca, does this mean you are officially a lobbyist now?
Looks like Swift Boaters redux.
If Obama was half a man, he would have blown that kid's head off, not bowed to him!
Suck Off Fat Ass is responsible for the content of this message.
Chris Christie, National Chairman
Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice!
None of these guys attended Julliard.
Special Operations for America – sounds a group that collects quarters in cans at the supermarket.
Glad to see that Rebecca didn't get blown away by that "Hurricane" created by the National Hurricane Center-National Weather Service-NOAA-Commerce Dept, i.e. Barack Hussein Obama sent to ruin Republican's beach vacation.
And there's no chance that R-convention will blow her away either, cause it's gonna pretty much suck.
She lacks the appropriate parts to be blown away around that many Republicans…
Kiss my Converse Leroy!Who's the Master?SHOWNUFF! The Shogun of the White House.
Special Ops Birther sounds a lot like crazy girlfriend. "I love this country SO MUCH…" /glennclose
Too bad SOFA wasn't around to fight the Ottomans.
I love a good Ottoman joke.
That's one way to couch the issue.
Today's GOP – every bit as smart as the furniture.
cf. Barney Frank and the dining room table.
This thread needs a little divan intervention.
They're all a bunch of stools.
They are all lazy boys, now.
Chiffarobes.
The SOFA sleeper cell has finally activated!
How many more troops to pull out?
Which one adheres to all three pillows of Islam?
Reagan & Bush bowed, especially Dubya Bush who held hands with fat Saudi princes. Did they ever think that it's a cultural thing, i.e. a sign of mutual respect, and not some grovelling boot-in-your-face thing (perhaps that's what these unnamed "Special Ops for America" want – their Orwellian boots in everyone's faces?)
Have you got links of Reagan and Bush bowing? That would be golden.
Here's Dubya in a smooch with a Saudi prince. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QRhDzpJV2TM&NR…
SOFA is a place fat fucks sit and watch Fox News and eat pork rinds and drink Coors. It is known.
Hey, I'm drinking a Coors right now!
Coors is a socialist Canadian beer now!!
We only have Coors Lite up here… Apparently Coors Fat is only for Americans… Take that however you want…
I'm trying to gain weight! Don't want my neighbors to think I'm a liberal!
We don't consider it Canadian up here- it's not like it's Molsons.
Mitt Romney would have had Osama thrown into a tree shredder instead of all this "respecting Islamic customs" nonsense!
Oh fer fuck's sake.
We have an acronym for that now, ya know.
Yes, but sometimes there's no substitute for typing out the full phrase.
SOFA?
That's it. Everyone needs to stop making YouTube videos for the next two years. The site should be taken down, and everyone who posts there should pay attention to their jobs, girlfriends, boyfriends, families, community activities, social activities, and social lives. This would mark a great improvement on contemporary society.
Just as long as I don't have to stop posting videos of the wife/girlfriends on youporn, I'm cool with that.
You will if the GOP platform is ever implemented.
I find half the YouTube videos someone wants me to see end up with audio I don't get. My audio is set up to get most but it seems some are really out there in what was done. If I can't get the video to work in 15 seconds, fugeddaboutit.
But where will I get my cute kitties playing, and fake credits for Community set to the Buffy theme song?
Restrict YouTube to kitten videos!
And Craig Ferguson uploads.
Make 'em use PowerPoint. That'll shut it down.
That little boy is totally going to grow up and be president some day, and occupy that very office-without-corners, and I will have voted for him. Doesn't he look nascently Presidential to you? (Also adorable, too.)
Yup on both counts. Adorbz & also too Prezanuntal.
Apparently, once you go black you never quite find your way all the back, so his chances seem distinctly enhanced by the election of one Barack Huessein Obama. I, for one, welcome our woolen-headed future overlords.
I'm really really really hoping that this is true. When I was a sprout, all the SF I read had Black presidents, male and female. I don't want to die without seeing the SECOND Black POTUS and hopefully at least ONE Black FEMALE elected to power.
That kid sure has a nice Nazi salute.
The hot chick from "Bow Wow Wow" could kick the ass of all these chickenhawks.
Bow Wow Wow? Great idea–I could use a good video after watching that crap from "I thought he was dead" Breitbart's site:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ymT8PGiqPP8
You can't kill the Breitbart… When booze/drugs/hypertension struck him down he became more powerful than we could imagine…
I don't see how this guy's conclusion follows from his points? I was in SEAL, OBAMA NO BOW TO SAUDI! BECAUSE SPECIAL OPERATIONS!!!!11!!!
Working backwards:
1)Iraq war good
2)Me in Iraq War!
so, because,
3)Freedom
To say nothing of the fact that the Iraq Wars were essentially fought to protect Saudi interests, so in a way the chumps who ended up fighting elective wars of aggression as if they were avenging 9/11 are the ones who may be seen as having bowed. Plus I'm guessing these dudes are Jell-O shot butt slupers par excellence.
Glad you said this.
That may be true, but don't discount the human mind's ability to add meaning to something that is horrible and meaningless. If you spent your entire life training and sacrificing for a war that was totally pointless, for a time, you will be unable to even consider that you have wasted your life. One's life, and mission, must have incredible value if the sacrifices contained in such a life were so great, otherwise, one's life, and sacrifices, were totally meaningless. Ego defense (narcissism, etc.) is strongest in those who have endured trauma because the trauma sends a message that the traumatized is worthless, and if this trauma was endured whilst tilting at windmills, the defense may be extreme.
Whoops, too deep?
Nope. I've been saying it for years. But it's good to hear it coming from someone who actually experienced all that shit firsthand.
Oh yeah, David S. Bernstein. I see your "bow-er" and raise you a fucking
Rape Denier.
Betelgeuse 3 was kind of a letdown after the excitement of Betelgeuses 1 and 2.
That's what happens when you have to replace Michael Keaton with some honk from Chelsea Lately.
I see your Beetlejuice joke and raise you a Ford Prefect joke…
Time is an illusion, lunchtime doubly so…
This shit is making me want to get drunk enough to teleport in comfort.
I have yet to experience a time when I haven't wanted to be that drunk… But I needz moar peenutz!
We should all be forever grateful to Eunice Kennedy Shriver for creating Special Operations for America.
Wow, it took 10 seconds to find out raging crazy Ryan Zinke, a GOP state senator and former Navy SEAL commander is behind the Special Operations for America.
Needs moar boobies.
Yeah, why not?
"These are naked, naked boobies. I was a Navy Seal. NO VOTE FOR OBAMMY!!11!!"
I hope you used protection if you touched his mouse. (You are lovely!)
There are hundreds – maybe thousands, maybe even millions – of reasons I'll vote for Barack Obama, but one of them is that he seems to be one of a handful of people in the United States capable of demonstrating some humility.
Of all his traits, the one I find my favorite is his universal curiosity about shit in general. If our cowboy president had had a tenth of the curiosity about existence that Obama has, we'd be much better off, today.
You know, sometimes when you're a rich, well-armed behemoth and the world's only superpower and you're not an insecure, xenophobic frightened half-man, you don't mind doing something that appears outwardly humble. Because you're a rich, well-armed behemoth and the world's only superpower and not some scabrous, insecure, score-keeping small-minded sissy.
President Bush dancing in Saudi Arabia
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pF5MhzFdBsU&fe…
Assholes.
Saudis called this "Dancing With The Tards."
“We sacrifice not because we have to … we fight because we need to.“ Aren`t have to and need to the same?
Pedant.
No, moron, it's not because you need to. It's because the country needs it done.
Yeah, how dare Obama use a gesture of respect that every other President ever has also performed!
Really, they are still on this bullshit? What's next, more teleprompter "jokes"?
57 states, uv cawse. Also too, corpse man.
Again I ask: have you got links to that? Because nobody ever mounted any kind of defense of Obama for bowing when it happened (that I saw).
They try to do the TelePrompTer jokes, but half the time to feed on their TeleprompTer goes wonky and they screw up the reading.
Their audience laughs anyway, because Obummer + TelePrompTer = "Lookit the incompetent blah person what cain't do nuffin without affirmative action, hyuk hyuk hyuk!"
Why, yes. Yes, I AM showing off with the capitalization.
He should also be ashamed for putting his feet up on the Resolute desk like every other WHITE president has done.
The best ad I've seen since Thomas Dewey's attack newsreel in the '44 campaign ("FDR, if he can't stand for the national anthem, how will he stand up to Hitler and Tojo?").
Was that an actual campaign slogan? You'r not making this up?
Betelgeuse 3? I haven't seen Betelgeuse 2. Is at available from Netflix?
That top pic is so adorable that it threatens to render my snark inoperable.
I love it that one of the anarchist soldiers who planned to overthrow the gubermint was named Michael Roark – COINCIDENCE??? I think not.
In related news, (See needs more boobies) there is a faux Sarah Palin stripper in Tampa who is apparently packing the house. Editrix, I think this bears looking into? http://www.nypost.com/p/news/national/faux_palin_…
Not "a" Sarah Palin stripper, "The" Sarah Palin Stripper!!
Did anybody think this ad wasn't coming?
Yes, how dare the American President be respectful of other people. It is almost like he is a foreigner or something. Damn it Obama, you can't drop bombs on people while you are bowing (unless you are a Texan with a Saudi prince, but that is different).
But seriously, what the fuck does being in Military have to do with your President bowing?
What does being in the military have to do with anything? There are plenty of asshats in the military and when they are disrespectful of the CiC, they dishonor their uniforms and their country.
Is there an anit-FoxPAC video pointing out they gave the name and location of the former SEAL who is having a book published about the Osama raid?
Or, because it was ok to disclose Valerie Plame's identity, exposing this war hero to a world-wide terrorist assult is also no biggie?
Speaking of videos, I *know* some of you Wonketteers won't like this:
The GOP platform committee has included a plank in this year's draft document calling for "vigorous" enforcement of anti-pornography laws…
The new language replaces previous platform wording, which only opposed child pornography. It will now read, "Current laws on all forms of pornography and obscenity need to be vigorously enforced." Trueman noted that current federal obscenity laws not only prohibit distribution of hardcore pornography on the Internet but also on hotel/motel TV, on cable/satellite TV, and in retail shops.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/08/27/gop-anti…
50 Shades of wtf
You'll take my porn from my cold, dead hard drive!
But I thought the Republicans don't hate sex, they just want to protect the cute little blastocysts.
I've lost far, far too much pornography to cold, dead hard drives… :(
So… you plan on prohibiting distribution of hardcore pornography on the INTERNET? Yeah… good luck with that…
I'm thinking Repuglycuntz really don't know very much about life at all.
Apparently the GOP plan for diversification involves also alienating all the old white men.
Considering that these wankers are the first ones to look at porn while pushing their family values this is rich… Again, why aren't there reporters out their showing these jerks exercising their non-family values???????
Saw a stat somewhere that indicated the Red States, especially the South, had the highest rates of porn viewership, not that there's anything wrong with that.
Yup. Utah tops the list. Of people PAYING for porn on the InterNetz. No wonder their church finds it so easy to pry the tithe out of their hands. Damn motherfuckers are dumber than a three-day-old squirrel on crack.
No pornography? My god, the Internet will collapse!
OK, Rebecca, which pickup line works the best?
A. "Hi. I'm a reporter with the Boston Phoenix."
B. "This is my last night in town."
This could be the worst thing since G.H.W. Bush puked on the Japanese Prime Minister. Well maybe not, because that was AWESOME! OK, not if you were the Japanese Prime Minister. Srsly though, do you want a pussy who cozzies up to those foreigns, or someone that pukes on them? I think we know where the heartland stands on this one!
Yeah, exactly. We need someone who will go up to that bastard and karate chop him in the god damned neck. "This is for 9/11, you Saudi bastard!" And ride off on a sweet fucking dirtbike.
Oh no, they got me-SPECOP for America has appealed to my inner illogical 11 year old!
'We need someone who will go up to that bastard and karate chop him in the god damned neck. "This is for 9/11, you Saudi bastard!" And ride off on a sweet fucking dirtbike."
Mountain Dew Camacho?
Real Japanese slang-"Bushururu." The act of puking on someone.
I thought it was Bushkaki…
Just Googled it-actually, "Bushuru". I added an extra "-ru". Sorry.
Bushkaki is funnier, you have to admit that…
That sounds more like he's shitting on them.
OT BUT JESUS FUCKING CHRIST WHY DO I LISTEN TO MARA LIASSOM?!!?!?!?!?!
What is it this time, Dear?
hehehehehe
Was that another trailer for that silly D'Souza film?
That's all they've got?
“Navy SEALs, Special Operations Personnel and Veterans across America have been outraged since Barack Obama conveniently took credit for killing Osama Bin Laden for political gain,”
I'M SO SURE! All the Navy Seals I know think the Bamz is the bomb.
I'm sure they're also thrilled that Disney copyrighted the term "Seal Team Six" :P They're all going to be celebrity seal cartoons!
SOA? SOL more like. Their brains are clearly MIA.
Brilliant visual, Rebeca, because what it comes down to is which is really scarier to the rethugagains? That the President bowed in front of a Saudi or that he showed a little boy that a man with nappy hair can be President of the United States.
Poverty stricken white racists should vote for Obama, if Romney wins he will trash their trailer parks, close down their meth labs, and chase the rednecks into homeless shelters. Displaced blond blue eyed mountain mommas will have no choice but to beg NBA stars for a home.
So, the kid from a (presumably) small planet somewhere in the vicinity of Betelgeuse… How many mothers does he share with Zaphod Beeblebrox?
Is B. not traditionally phrased as "I'm shipping out in the morning"?
Do It For Our Country
I dunno about that. I had a t-shirt (All American Boy, Castro Street, San Francisco) printed across where the pocket would be "Last Night In Town" and I was very, very happy with the results.
The cons always bring a knife to a gun fight. Here's Bush II making out with the King of Saudi Arabia http://tinyurl.com/9xfh72n
I hope it doesn't bother you, but I posted that link as a comment on the original article…
Damn, good job. When you click on the URL, all the photos of Dubya making out with King Saudi show up right there on the page.
"he is selling out the entire planet to Zorubi, Boy King of Betelgeuse 3. "
But Betelgeuse is a red supergiant, formerly a blue giant, which will soon (in astronomical terms) go supernova and is not, nor will it ever be, old enough for any planets it may have to develop life.
I suppose "the vicinity of Betelgeuse" doesn't mean "in the Betelgeuse solar system" but c'mon man, Ford Prefect came from SOMEWHERE… and it was "a small planet somewhere in the vicinity of Betelgeuse"… If the fundies have shown me anything it's that if something is in a book that you like enough, it's absolutely true even if it contradicts facts…
So… You're wrong, dude…
If there's one thing I learned this from the swift boaters, it's that no one is above being questioned about their military service. With that in mind, my guess is that Special Ops does a lot of birthday cake deliveries for military brass and pretend missions, but that's about it. Except when the president asks for results, that is.
Do I win a prize?
With an apology to friends and family in the Marine Corps, do you know what the term Marine stands for? Muscles Are Required Intelligence Not Essential.
An old Army guy told me that.
Forget these idiot Seals and checkout my kittens! (Actually they are older now and most have found new homes!)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embed…
Check out my Hummingbirds too!! http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embed…
Squeeeee!!
Kitties!
Wut tessiee said. I'm totally squee'd on teh kittehs.
didn't Bush hold hands and kiss the Saudi king? Didn't Bush bow to the Queen of England?
Aw…so cute. Obama bows down to let the little kid rub his head.
If it were Bush, the President would be saying to the poor urchin, "Pull my finger."
Okay, darn it. I thought it said "Wankette" and expected lots of pleasurable women.
My bad.
I was wondering why the Obama Campaign released this. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IhnUgAaea4M
Sweet Lawdy Jebus. You should read the *comments.*
You've got to admit the dreamy music and the face-paint won you over, ¿No?
But, it's totally al lright if your president is frenching saudi princes and holding their hands like an infatuated young couple, right?
Fuck you, SOFA.
It's ALL about being BLAH, don'tchu know? It's perfectly OK for our WHITE Presidents to do whatever they want, but anything our BLAH President does must be endlessly analyzed by the pinheads on Pox Ooze who want to know if this *particular* fist-bump might yet be that elusive *terrorist* fist-bump for which they're searching.
I just KNOW you read Ta-Nehisi Coates' piece, what did you think of it?
It is tooooo fuckin' early to laugh this hard.
Pasty-faced pantload Rightards can only see Barry's huge fucking gunboats and hate him even more; because big feet, big……..!
But does he have any pictures of Obama holding hands and kissing a Saudi king?
http://www.shtfplan.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/0…
WHERE'S THE LOVE BREITARD BABY???
Okay, so where's the re-edit where some clever replaces the image of Obama bowing with Bush kissing and holding hands?
Than!ks Rebecca, See, this photo is why I still like Barack Obama, despite all the bad bankers and the surge stuff. Measure a man by the way he treats a child.
Why is Emmanuel Lewis in the Oval Office?
Just my opinion but if this country showed just a bit more humility then maybe half the world wouldn't hate our guts and spend their entire lives trying to think up ways to blow us up. Just sayin'
I have never been got like you just got me, dood. Ears AND tail to SavageDrummer.
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