Oh no. Not again

Akin Clarifies Clarification: Women Just Constantly Lie About Rape All The Time

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Clarification subject to further clarificationSerial fact-raper Todd Akin (R-R’lyeh) has decided, what the hell, since he’s clarifying things, he might as well just clarify a little more. After telling Mike Huckabee that he’s definitely still running for the Senate, and after appearing to momentarily acknowledge biological facts, Akin has now doubled down on the crazy, insisting in an interview with Dana Loesch that, actually yeah, his original claim about ladies and rape was pretty much right, maybe, except he meant “forcible,” not “legitimate” and that what he really meant to say is that ladies just plain lie about being raped so they can get them some sweet public abortion dollars. He also denies ever implying that he said that rapists were legitimate, which is good, because literally NOBODY thought he said that. Akin also appeared to backtrack on his earlier “apology,” referring to the thoroughly discredited opinions of Dr. John C. Willke, who first popularized the notion that ladyparts magically prevent pregnancy in a rape:

AKIN: You know, Dr. Willke has just released a statement and part of his letter, I think he just stated it very clearly. He said, of course Akin never used the word legitimate to refer to the rapist, but to false claims like those made in Roe v. Wade and I think that simplifies it….. There isn’t any legitimate rapist…. [I was] making the point that there were people who use false claims, like those that basically created Roe v. Wade.

Here is a recording of Akin’s forcible, illegitimate assault upon logic, reality, and the English language:

[ThinkProgress / NYT]

About the author

Doktor Zoom Is the pseudonym of Marty Kelley, who lives in Boise, Idaho. He acquired his nym from a fan of Silver-Age comics after being differently punctual to too many meetings. He is not a medical doctor, although he has a real PhD (in Rhetoric and Composition).

View all articles by Doktor Zoom

Comments

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  • Dr_Zoidberg

    Oh, fuck you, Akin.

    • SixThirty

      Just do it legitimately, so no one gets preggers.

      • IonaTrailer

        I think we need to clarify what Akins means:
        Legitimate rape – must present at ER with a minimum broken jaw or arm, plus semen in vaginal tract (rectal bleeding a plus).
        Non- Legit rape – woman claims she's been raped because (if the GOP have their way) being 6 weeks pregnant with 3 kids when your husband walks out isn't a good enough reason to have an abortion.
        God's will. Suck it up.

    • Dudleydidwrong

      If the Law of Gravity were suddenly repealed–just for this assclown–and he went sailing off into space, it would be a net gain for Planet Earth but the Universe would let out a collective moan and reject him. Then he would be the new Philip Nolan, "The Man Without A Planet."

    • IonaTrailer

      This asshole is an official recipient of the "Golden Coat-hanger Award".
      Ladies, get ready for a ride back to the12th Century. Did I mention if the Rethugicans win, they're changing the name of the county to Ameristan.

      • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

        Also, too, issuing free burqas to all and sundry (females only).

        • BerkeleyBear

          Damn it, I was looking forward to the freedom of never grooming myself again, like Homer's discovery of the power of the muu muu. And now my Y chromosome has disqualified me.

          Oh well, back to synchronized swimming practice. What's that? Damn it all!

          • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

            I know, it's so unfair. Damn lucky duckies, those wimmenz.

    • http://wonkette.com/ outragedcitizen

      And yet another reason why I will never go back to Missouri.

  • Toomush_Infer

    Actually, the ladiez just claim it for the LOLs…

    • http://twitter.com/bookofruthless boobookitteh

      I do it whenever I'm bored.

      • anniegetyerfun

        It's fun! So much fun, discussing being raped. My friends and I sometimes just spend our lunch hours making up rape stories. WAY better than pillow fights or braiding hair or anything.

        • UW8316154

          Tickle-fights!!

      • LocalGirlMakesGoo

        RAPE! LOL let's go to the mall and get some abortions and shoes.

        • emmelemm

          I really want to make some sort of joke about fetus-skin shoes, but even I feel a little bad about it.

          • http://wonkette.com Lionel[redacted]Esq

            They would look nice though.

          • GunToting[Redacted]

            Yeah, but they would be a bitch to maintain.

          • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

            Oh, that's AWFUL, em, AWFUL!! Everybody KNOWS fetus-skin is much too delicate for that sort of usage. Try gloves.

          • zippy_w_pinhead

            I remember Dylan singing a song like that. Fetus-Skin Pill-Box Hat

        • Negropolis

          I don't know why I'm laughing so hard at this. The visual of some valley girls saying this just put me over the edge.

      • tessiee

        "I do it whenever I'm bored."

        I kill my babbys, and then make donuts out of them, so I can be whorey AND fat.

        • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

          Teh babbies make good donuts? Who'd'a thunk?

        • Negropolis

          Actual blood libel!

          • HistoriCat

            I don't hold with those furrin recipes – I say drain the blood first. You get a more refined donut that way.

    • BerkeleyBear

      I assume that since Akin's been lying about sex since junior high, he just assumes everyone does.

      I actually think projection has a lot to do with claims like this, especially since the proponents are almost always men who sure look like creepy, handsy types.

      • miss_grundy

        Projection as he's never had sex with a woman, he's just had sex with blow up dolls because this jerk sounds like a real loser. Which is why he hates women and is now claiming that women are pathological liars when it comes to rape claims. If the women in Missouri had brains in their heads, they would stone him at campaign events or throw rotten eggs and vegetables at him.

  • Tequila Mockingbird
    • zippy_w_pinhead

      Where's the Holy Stork?

      • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

        Flies in after all the fun has happened.

    • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

      I'm very familiar with the Sin Button. Makes interesting noises when pressed.

      • zippy_w_pinhead

        is that the one that when pressed says "that was easy"?

        • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

          Wow. You be hangin' wit ALL tha WRONG kinda wimmenz, dood.

        • tessiee

          It is at MY house.

    • Negropolis

      L-O-effin'-L at the "sin button." Ha!

  • JudasPeckerwood

    I think he's just plain lying about wanting to be a Senator.

    • zippy_w_pinhead

      don't kid yourself, in that Bible belt cesspool he still stands a better than 50/50 chance of being one. The GOP money will all come home once they realize he's called their bluff and the power of irrational hatred of Claire/Obama/liberal baby killers is nothing to be underestimated

      • Geminisunmars

        Don't forget the power of name-recognition.

        • HogeyeGrex

          Apparently, all advertising really is good advertising.

      • http://wonkette.com Lionel[redacted]Esq

        Plus, Missouri is not a legitimate state anyway.

        • sullivanst

          It's Compromised.

          • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

            So snarky, subtle, and clever. Sarpint!

        • Negropolis

          Missouri is St. Louis on one side, Kansas City on the other, and Missourah all the way through the middle.

          • HistoriCat

            Some of the college towns are nice and college town-y but yeah.

          • Negropolis

            Yeah, that's basically true everywhere, even in PA.

      • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

        Teabaggers are jockeying to get Sarah Steelman in, Todd refuses to step down (I believe the 5 pm deadline has passed), Repiglets and super-PACs have pulled all their money out. He tried to make it a "I'm a teabagger and we little people will fight the Republican Establishment," but Dick Armey's TeaPartyExpress and Judson Phillips' teabaggers both distanced themselves from him immediately. Now he's trying to get the religious nutbags to finance him. It's turning into a three-ring circus and forcing press attention on the fact that Ryan cosponsored some of the most extreme ladyparts regulationing ever and also the fact that the Repiglican PARTY has adopted the same exact extreme position in their official party platform. All hell breaketh loose even as we squeak. I'm delighted.

        • Fox E. Puppet

          Just to back you up on the Ryan/Akin connection: http://goo.gl/KZvWM

          And, yes, he missed his 5pm deadline, but there's a theory that Sep 25 is the 'real' deadline for withdrawing from the race (with a court order excuse)…

          • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

            Thank you, my friend.

            The GOP has not stopped pressuring him. At this point, he's reduced to begging for $3 donations on his Web page. A whole ~3,000 people have signed on. The RWNJ godbag *organizations* have given him *verbal* support but, apparently, no munnies. Methinks he'll be crawling in around Sep 25 with oleaginous tears oozing down those withered cheeks. He's already sobbing about how he apologized but the Libs just want to destroy him.

          • tessiee

            "there's a theory that Sep 25 is the 'real' deadline"

            So, subtracting nine months, that means the deadline became a person last December 25.

      • BerkeleyBear

        Hey, now, Missouri has some solid liberal areas. Granted they are almost all in St. Louis or KC and the state does its darndest to disenfranchise these areas by starving them of resources on election day, but they exist.

        There are also a lot of Harry Truman Democrats there. Obama almost took Missouri in 08 (the margin was less than 3000 votes) and in that same election a centrist Dem won the governor's race handily. So while I doubt Obama can even make it competitive (and I think he has stayed out to give McCaskill some more room to distance herself, since retaining her seat is critical to getting anything done for the next 4 years) McCaskill has more than a puncher's chance.

        • sullivanst

          Obama almost took Missouri in 08

          Yes, Missouri – only a little more backwards than Indiana.

          :P

        • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

          It's starting to look like MO women are agreeing with you. Just a week ago, Akin was leading McCaskill by double digits. Today, he has a ONE-point lead.

    • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

      Must be. He's dropped from a ten-point lead over McCaskill to a single point. Doesn't help that he keeps "explainicatamating" hisself.

      • tessiee

        It helps us.

        • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

          You don't hear *me* complaining, sweetcakes.

  • johnnymeatworth

    Can we start paying prisoners to rape him until he gets pregnant?

    • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

      With votes, you mean

      • Jus_Wonderin

        Actor, were you the one that commented "Dude, quit diggin' that hole!!"

        • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

          I was, aye. And for this precise reason: we could and should be focusing on Romney's tax returns and Ryan's attempts to strike Social Security down. The convention is next week. That discussion gets lost until after Labor Day, and who knows what will come up after that.

          • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/2012/06/introducing-bad-note-millstones-of-jazz.html Chet Kincaid_

            The Democratic Convention will be a Festival Of Tax Returns and Social Security. But you're underestimating women if you think this discussion of the War On Themselves won't affect the Presidential election. And issues that affect Congressional races are important too, unless you want another 4 years of Congress completely obstructing anything Obama tries to do.

          • glasspusher

            I hope so, Chet. My sister and her daughter wouldn't vote fer Bammers if it put their burning house out. Granted, they aren't moderates by a long shot. They have bought into the Jebus (meaning right wing men) know best fer them :(

          • Pennywhistler

            Hope none of you three ever needs health care, or -god forbid – an abortion.

          • glasspusher

            They have health care, for now…my sister is even a nurse!

          • Pennywhistler

            I got mine, so fuck the other gals. Is that it?

          • glasspusher

            Pretty much!

          • miss_grundy

            I truly feel sorry for your sister and your niece. I'm thankful that I came from a family of strong women and that my grandfather wanted his daughters to be that way.

          • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

            Unusual, in those days. Kudos to your Grandfather.

          • Negropolis

            Here's the beauty of this situation: we've got so many good fronts to attack these two from. We can always go back to the tax returns, and we can always go back to their views on women's health issues. It's not an either/or.

          • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

            You sure do know how to make a political junkie happy, dude.

          • BerkeleyBear

            Idiot Rom Rom has announced he's gonna drop his 2011 return (the only other one we are getting, remember?) by October 15. He is, in fact, gonna October Surprise himself, by all but guaranteeing that the last two weeks of the campaign are about what he's hiding. That, or he'll blow the deadline (making it even worse), or suddenly be forthcoming with more (which makes him a caving liar for all his past stonewalling).

            Seriously, the biggest issue with Mitt is knowing which fuckups to focus on and which ones to let go – especially when the best the other side can do is try to resurrect the Joe the Plumber and "gods and guns" lines from 4 years ago. I'm not smart or seasoned enough to second guess Plouffe, Axelrod et al on this.

          • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

            I must say, Plouffe has his future made regardless of what happens on Nov. 6th. David Axelrod says he's retiring to spend time with his badly disabled daughter. But, yeah. The Gods, they smile upon Mr. Barack Hussein. They gave him an opponent who had the munnies to crush anyone else in the race but the singular ill-luck to fuck up every time he breathes. Although that is not to detract one iota from the incredible skill with which Obama's team has been handling the re-election. Pity I can't find it in my heart to feel the least bit sorry for Mitt the Shitt.

    • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

      Dude, it's gonna take a while … oh, wait. I think I get it.

  • AlterNewt

    I am anxious to hear more from this gentleman.

    • rickmaci

      Me too. Less than 80 days to go before the election and we will spend at least another week and more, probably well past the Retardlican convention, talking about this guy and the attack (a word I use very carefully given the topic) on reproductive rights in their party platform. The President can beat them mercilessly over the head with their moronic positions and never get hit by them on his most vulnerable issues, like the economy and health care.

    • RedneckMuslin

      Me too but I think his hari- kari has concluded.

      • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

        Nope. He's staying in the race and has just flipped the Koch brothers the finger. Hang in there, it's just *starting* to get interesting. Every second this misogynist asshole occupies the media starlings is one more second they spend eyeballing his connection with the Republican ticket.

    • BerkeleyBear

      Does he, perhaps, have a newsletter we can subscribe to?

      • AlterNewt

        Certainly not a hot lesbian newsletter.

        • http://wonkette.com Lionel[redacted]Esq

          There are non-hot lesbian newsletters?

          • AlterNewt

            A point well taken.

          • Negropolis

            I take it you don't subscribe to Rosie O'Donnell's facebook.

    • Negropolis

      Then you're going to have an anxiety attack, because there is nary a gentleman in sight.

  • http://www.tumblr.com/blog/hamsterpantsworld Hammiepants

    I liked life better two days ago when I had no clue who this perfidious cockbucket was.

    • emmelemm

      + 1

    • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

      And I thought I was clever calling him an "obtusicle"…

      • tessiee

        Is an an obtusicle an obstacle in your tush?

    • anniegetyerfun

      I now know what I want the title of my first novel to be.

      • Nostrildamus

        "Nancy Drew and the Perfidious Cock-bucket" ?

      • HogeyeGrex

        Totes my new band name.

    • WhatTheHeck

      There’s many more like him dragging their knuckles in the 5,000 year old republican world.

    • kittensdontlie

      What a shame. In Romneyworld, you could wash away those days from your mind retroactively, not so in this Obamanation.

    • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

      "perfidious cockbucket"? Run away with me!

      • http://www.tumblr.com/blog/hamsterpantsworld Hammiepants

        Flaming invective is my specialty.

        • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

          Then we'll get along like a house afir … uh, very well, that's the ticket.

          Hey, your Tumblr blog requires a name and password, man. I ain't got no Tumblr account.

          • http://www.tumblr.com/blog/hamsterpantsworld Hammiepants

            I hardly ever update it. I'm mostly on FB or here. Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

    • http://www.indiegogo.com/revive-vlad Doktor Zoom

      Totally stealing that for the next Akin post…

      • http://www.tumblr.com/blog/hamsterpantsworld Hammiepants

        My pleasure! Enjoy it in good health!

  • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

    Todd, perhaps you should take heed of the wisdom of Confucius, as told by Tex Antoine (and periphrased by yours truly): "When a self-inflicted buttfucking is inevitable, lay back, relax, and enjoy it."

    • AncienReggie

      He should have gone with Robert Benchley: "Drawing upon my vast command of the English language, I said nothing."

      Of course I enjoyed Erick Erickson's characterization of this douchetool revealing his actual beliefs as a "gaffe." Yeah, right. Ill advised honesty is always a gaffe for these cretins.

    • Pennywhistler

      God damn! Uncle Wethbee's partner? Whooda thunk it?

      I lost treack of him after he announced the radio Adventures of Archie Andrews

  • 1stNewtontheMoon

    this is about the time el rushbo and st. sean the altar boy call him back up and ask him to spend more time with his family (which was totally NOT created by rape).

  • http://facethesuncastnoshadow.wordpress.com/ Mumbletypeg

    Even the rapists themselves are starting to think this guy is a twisted, sick fuck.

    • Jus_Wonderin

      "Alex, I'll take The Rapists for 400."

    • not that Dewey

      "Hey, we're just psychopaths, man. What's this guy's excuse?"

      • RadioBowels

        He's a psychopathic, rapist….politician.

        • Geminisunmars

          Quadruple whammy!

      • rickmaci

        He is just plain stupid.

    • Lot_49

      Particularly the illegitimate rapists. "Who's this Akin guy calling us bastards?"

    • Warwhatgoodfor

      As in : we got an excuse, we was born fucked up. What's your whiny, pissant, wanker, bitchy little reason , bitch?

  • http://twitter.com/bookofruthless boobookitteh

    Am I missing something? (probably) But what does rape have to do with Roe v. Wade?

    One is a terrible crime. The other is a Supreme Court decision that protects me from other people sticking their nose in my pregnancy bizniss.

    Pls explain. Kthx.

    • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

      It's a wriggle-room thing: if you throw the "exception in the case of rape" thing in his face, he can claim that since a woman can't get pregnant from a "real rape" there's no need for an abortion so no exception need be granted.

      • http://twitter.com/bookofruthless boobookitteh

        Roe v. Wade protects privacy for all women and their pregnancy business. Not just rape survivors. I hate to be a pedant, but I am really annoyed at how people are obfuscating the basic right to privacy that Roe is based upon. It's nobody's fucking business why I want an abortion and it's nobody's fucking business if I'm getting one – or two or twenty.

        I am fairly outraged that we are backsliding to the days when women couldn't even take birth control pills without society getting up in their vaginas, never mind having a legitimate medical procedure (pun intended).

        • comrad_darkness

          Thanks, I was wondering this too. The only conclusion I could reach was that we are getting a glimpse inside the well-established ignoramus worldview of the right including their reinvention of the history of the constitution and supreme court decisions. This has been happening more lately. There is batshit rhetoric, already strangely well formed, leaking out about other supreme court cases.

        • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/2012/06/introducing-bad-note-millstones-of-jazz.html Chet Kincaid_

          I can go look this up myself, but I have never really understood how the hand-wave of "right to privacy" with regard to abortion is all that need be said. The most convincing Pro-Life argument (to aim at men, I suppose) to me is that you can't force someone to sacrifice their Actual Life for a Potential Life/Partial Life. In the same way that you can't force me to get my bone marrow yanked out to save my brother's life. Is that what is implicit in the "privacy" argument?

          • sullivanst

            The relevant parts of the decision (citations omitted throughout):

            In a line of decisions, … the Court has recognized that a right of personal privacy, or a guarantee of certain areas or zones of privacy, does exist under the Constitution. In varying contexts, the Court or individual Justices have, indeed, found at least the roots of that right in the First Amendment; in the Fourth and Fifth Amendments; in the penumbras of the Bill of Rights; in the Ninth Amendment; or in the concept of liberty guaranteed by the first section of the Fourteenth Amendment. These decisions make it clear that only personal rights that can be deemed "fundamental" or "implicit in the concept of ordered liberty" are included in this guarantee of personal privacy. They also make it clear that the right has some extension to activities relating to marriage; procreation; contraception; family relationships; and childrearing and education.

            I read that as saying that the right to privacy protects the exercise of other rights the Court has recognized, not that the Court protects rights to preserve privacy.

            This right of privacy, whether it be founded in the Fourteenth Amendment's concept of personal liberty and restrictions upon state action, as we feel it is, or, as the District Court determined, in the Ninth Amendment's reservation of rights to the people, is broad enough to encompass a woman's decision whether or not to terminate her pregnancy. The detriment that the State would impose upon the pregnant woman by denying this choice altogether is apparent. Specific and direct harm medically diagnosable even in early pregnancy may be involved. Maternity, or additional offspring, may force upon the woman a distressful life and future. Psychological harm may be imminent. Mental and physical health may be taxed by child care. There is also the distress, for all concerned, associated with the unwanted child, and there is the problem of bringing a child into a family already unable, psychologically and otherwise, to care for it. In other cases, as in this one, the additional difficulties and continuing stigma of unwed motherhood may be involved. All these are factors the woman and her responsible physician necessarily will consider in consultation.

            The start of this is a little confusing, but I feel this section as a whole backs up my earlier statement that the right to privacy is protecting the exercise of a right otherwise discovered, not creating a new right. The Court had earlier engaged in an exercise of originalism and determined that at the time of the founding fathers, women had access to legal abortion – neither state statutes nor English common law at that time prohibited it, the state legislation to proscribe the procedure was mostly the product of the mid-19th century. Furthermore, they examined the various claims for what motivated that legislation: first they dismissed as unserious the notion that it was to discourage promiscuous behavior; then they found the only legitimate motivation at the time was to protect women against the health risks (e.g. sepsis) the procedure posed in the 19th century, before further finding that as medical science had made early-term abortion safer than childbirth, that interest was no longer sufficient to justify interference in a right found in the liberty protected by due process; finally they dismissed as illegitimate any claim of fetal right-to-life, although recognizing some state interest in protecting potential life which becomes more compelling as fetal viability increases.

          • BerkeleyBear

            To a degree, yes. Privacy is sort of this catchall provision (as illustrated from sullivanst's citations) that grows out of awkward cases in a lurching, almost amoeba-like fashion up to Roe, and then gets beat to hell by Rehnquist and Scalia and the right attacks as poorly constructed (which it was, by virtue of the very restraint the right now claims was lacking – because the Warren and Burger Courts dealt with everything issue by issue).

            Really, the thing the right should be willing to accept if they were at all consistent is that the entire Bill of Rights was about freedom from government intrusion on a person's conscience – their personal thoughts and actions that do not impact society writ large. Abortion should be right in the middle of all that, if you think about it. As you say, it might be noble of me to save someone else, but only my own conscience can dictate if I do it directly or not.

          • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

            Well, there IS that whole issue of the State having an overriding interest in protecting the lives of all its citizens, is there not, and the ensuing attempt to grant a fertilized ovum the same Constitutional protections as an adult? Perhaps you could discourse on that issue briefly in the interest of educating me somewhat?

          • Boojum

            There is a discussion in Roe about "person" meaning the post-born. It is solid reasoning.

          • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

            Thank you, Booj. I shall go look it up.

          • sullivanst

            So, the state-level effort to pass personhood amendments is of course an attempt to overturn Roe. At first thought, you'd think it's doomed to failure – Roe explicitly dismisses fetal personhood, and for good reason, and so the first state amendment will be meaningless in the face of the Supremacy clause.

            I'm pretty sure the forced birthers know this though. The idea, most likely, is to get personhood passed in a large enough majority of states to make SCOTUS reconsider the concept, c.f. Loving in which standing precedent was overturned because of widespread movement in the states towards, in that case, the right outcome. I hasten to point out, I do not intend in any way to compare the merits of the cases.

          • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

            Thank you, sullivanst. So, it would appear that you, like Boojum, Biely, and many of us here, are a lawyer, then?

          • sullivanst

            Just a keen amateur.

          • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

            Very keen, indeed. Thank you for the extended education.

          • tessiee

            "The most convincing Pro-Life argument (to aim at men, I suppose) to me is that you can't force someone to sacrifice their Actual Life for a Potential Life/Partial Life. In the same way that you can't force me to get my bone marrow yanked out to save my brother's life."

            Ellen Willis made that argument very convincingly in her book of essays "No More Nice Girls". The standard in both ethics and law, that's been upheld over and over again, is that a *person* can't take precedence over a *person* — i.e., my cousin can't *force* me to donate a kidney. So fetal personhood — even if it could be established — is irrelevant. In order for a fetus' rights to prevail, either the fetus has to be superhuman, or the woman has to be less than human (which is what they believe, but has no legal standing).

          • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/2012/06/introducing-bad-note-millstones-of-jazz.html Chet Kincaid_

            Thanks for that reference, I will look her up!

        • BerkeleyBear

          Sorry, booboo, but blame the 9 old men who decided Roe for determining that although a fetus isn't a life the state has a compelling interest in protecting potential life, and that interest grows as the fetus comes closer to viability until eventually it exceeds the woman's rights entirely.

          At the time, this worked out fairly evenly in theory (but not in reality) – first trimester no one has a right to stop a woman, second trimester it is a balancing act, third trimester the state can prevent abortion. But then science had to go and prove fetal viability at earlier and earlier stages, so the presumption in favor of the state's rights got pushed back earlier and earlier (now generally after 20 weeks it is damn near impossible to get a legal abortion in many states). It is still a woman's right to get an abortion before then, but old white people (almost always men) keep finding that various regulations are not unduly burdensome on that right – little things like having to be told you are making a horrible choice, having to get your parents permission if you are a minor, having to wait several days from first appointment/counseling to actual procedure, forcing you to get a sonogram/heartbeat monitor just so you know what an awful person you really are, etc. The trans-vaginal assaults are supposedly in this same category, although those laws have largely wilted under legal challenges. Still, all this fun along with having to wade through assholes calling you a murderer for doing what any number of their mothers should have done is the price of freedom.

          The rape and health of the mother exceptions arose because in those limited circumstances, the woman has two sets of rights she's asserting – her basic privacy right along with a compelling right to maintain her own mental and physical health. So as not to seem like complete draconian assholes, these exceptions have been recognized as overriding the state's interests even in cases of post viability abortions. However, as the right wing Sharia has crept into the GOP leadership, they've pressed to repeal the health of the mother on the grounds that it is too vague – even McCain argued this at one point. They've also derided the rape exception. But fence straddlers like Romney still don't like the optics of forcing rape victims to carry their attackers' babies, so they support these exceptions even as they tout overturning Roe. Which is rather stupid, on the whole, and certainly lacking any moral consistency, but it is Mitt – what do you expect.

          Truth is, this entire issue is bullshit. Abortion should be about a woman's conscience, and her conscience alone, which is precisely the sort of liberty the Founders understood and attempted to enshrine in the First Amendment. Unless and until we can ensure every conceived fetus an awesome life with no burdens on the mother (ie eliminating reproduction as it exists) it is just an idiotic topic to discuss, much less legislate. But it didn't get argued that way, it wasn't decided on that basis, so we all get to live in the fallout.

          • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

            Dammit, BB, you read my mind and RETROACTIVELY obliged me! (Hugs the cuddlesome bear)

            Thanks, man.

        • tessiee

          "Roe v. Wade protects privacy for all women and their pregnancy business. Not just rape survivors. I hate to be a pedant, but I am really annoyed at how people are obfuscating the basic right to privacy that Roe is based upon."

          It's called "moving the goalposts". In two days we've gone from discussing whether women can have access to a legally protected medical procedure all the time, to whether women can have access to a legally protected medical procedure EVER, no middle ground.

          It's really goddamn scary when you think about it.

      • Warwhatgoodfor

        Wound up in the wrong spot, so to actor212; Truer words were never spoken.

    • Fukui-sanYesOta

      If I'm understanding Mr. Akin's 'argument', he's channeling Joe Wilson and yelling "YOU LIE!" at you.

      • zippy_w_pinhead

        purt much…

        • Boojum

          East Tennessee?

    • http://www.indiegogo.com/revive-vlad Doktor Zoom

      "In June 1969, Norma L. McCorvey discovered she was pregnant with her third child. She returned to Dallas, Texas, where friends advised her to assert falsely that she had been raped in order to obtain a legal abortion (with the understanding that Texas law allowed abortion in cases of rape and incest). However, this scheme failed because there was no police report documenting the alleged rape"
      http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roe_v._Wade

      i.e., if there's no rape exception, women can't lie about rape to get an abortion.

      Women who get raped can enjoy a precious gift from the Lord

      • http://twitter.com/bookofruthless boobookitteh

        Ah. Thank you. I was unaware of that.

        Of course I'm just going to note here that rape is an abysmally underreported crime, so there may not be a police report.

        Also, it is not entirely inconceivable that if the options are (as it seems it was for Ms. McCorvey) lying about being raped to obtain a legal, safe abortion or having some back alley butcher pop you on their kitchen table and perform the abortion with barely rinsed off coat hangers, some women may choose to lie about being raped to save their life and fertility.

      • emmelemm

        Ugh. And the whole point of "Roe" was to be Anon Y. Mouse, so that shit like this wouldn't be dragged into the decision. Yeah, that worked out real well.

      • sullivanst

        Of course, no part of the decision in Roe hinged in any way upon the fact that she was denied the abortion because she had no police report documenting a rape. Had the state allowed her the procedure under the rape exception, the case would never have come to court, or rather, wouldn't until later, with a different petitioner. Had the state not had a rape exception, the case would have proceeded slightly quicker due to lack of application for, and denial of, dispensation under the exception, but otherwise identically.

        But then, any kind of logical basis is something that's almost always conspicuously absent from these guys' attempts at argumentation.

      • IonaTrailer

        Lying sluts.

  • coolhandnuke

    If you find yourself in a Missouri Senate race…keep digging until you reach the 1800's.

    • An_Outhouse

      I believe somone pointed out somwhere today that this belief was first documented in 1200's. Todd has been a very busy gopher to reseurrect this bit of ancient misbelief.

    • Negropolis

      Buddy, they passed the 1800's decades ago. They've damn-near breached the wall of pre-history.

      • Boojum

        Um…Jesus on a dinosaur? They've breached pre-history AND the Holy Land of the Lost.

        • Negropolis

          LOL @ "Holy Land of the Lost."

          I had forgotten that there is no such thing as pre-history, since the earth is only a spritely 6,000 years old, and its history fully recorded in the Bible.

  • CthuNHu

    C'mon, men lie about rape all the time; why shouldn't we expect women to do it too?

    Once again, feminists are the real sexists.

    • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

      Wait. I thought we lied about being turned into newts?

      • Chichikovovich

        No, we actually were turned into newts. But we got better.

        • AlterNewt

          Well…

          • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

            *Some* of us did.

          • glasspusher

            Burn her anyway.

            (Fresh back from my bike ride, hint ,hint)

          • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

            Are you waggling your eyebrows at me, young man?

          • glasspusher

            You're no Jack Kennedy.I ain't young (on the outside) and you would have trouble seeing my eyebrows….What were we talking about?

          • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

            I'm not? (looks around for mirror, pats face)

            Damn, you're right, I'm not!

            Wuh?

    • http://wonkette.com Lionel[redacted]Esq

      I know that anytime you get me and my buds in a bar having drinks, it is all "Yeah, I raped her, do it again too, but this time I'm doing it illegitimately." Guys and their bragging.

      • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

        I've known guys to brag about rape. They don't *call* it rape, of course. It's all, "yaknow, I knew she wanted it, SHE knew she wanted it, but they just gotta play this little game, yaknow, being good girls or whatever that shit is, I gotta golden pussy. So I threw her on the bed, knocked the wind outa the bitch, and she kinda stopped pushing on me at that point."

        Bet you've heard it too.

        • Fare la Volpe

          I knew a guy who used to brag about gagging a one-night stand with his dick (and without asking her first, mind) to the point that she threw up and nearly passed out.

          Some sick fucking fucks out there.

          • glasspusher

            Classy. Yes there are, sadly- which is why the law sez rape is rape. The world isn't your perfect house, stupids…

          • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

            Yup.

            Remind me to tell you about the Biryani Murders some time.

        • tessiee

          I've always thought that the guy in the second letter (DEPART) and his roommate should both die of dick rot:
          http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid

          • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

            My partner and I often read Danny's columns to each other (it's *our* idea of foreplay. Laughter makes the pants slide off faster).

            That letter put us right out of the mood for quite a while. I just hope both those pricks got theirs.

          • http://www.flickr.com/photos/30500320@N06/ DerrickWildcat

            Yay, new ones up!

          • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

            Oh, my! That turtle's a good shot, too. I can just see the li'l guy tossing his head. "Hmph!"

          • http://www.flickr.com/photos/30500320@N06/ DerrickWildcat

            He's too good for me.

          • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

            *He* thinks so.

          • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

            ZOMG, those plovers!

          • http://www.flickr.com/photos/30500320@N06/ DerrickWildcat

            The real catch was the Buff-Breasted Sandpiper. They are a near threatened species with a pretty specific range as you can see here: http://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Buff-breasted_

            The Black Tern shot I am 97% happy with. Imagine trying to take a picture of a Swallow in flight. Black Terns are as maneuverable as Swallows, but faster. It took a lot of time and swearing to get that one shot.

          • sullivanst

            Love the depth of focus effects, I struggle to get them that pronounced even in macro mode, and I know you weren't that close. But then, your camera's a little nicer than mine ;)

        • Boojum

          True story. I knew some guys in college who told an uproariously "funny" story about gang banging a passed out drunk woman and then dumping her in a ditch (still breathing). They thought it was much fun.

          Even then, in my impressionable youth, I was nauseated.

          • HistoriCat

            I am pretty much done with humanity at this point. Can someone stop the world? I want to get off.

          • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

            (Hugs the HistoriCat)

          • HistoriCat

            You are too kind!

          • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

            I just want you to remember we're all in this fight together. We WILL leave this world a better place for the HistoriKittens.

    • Lot_49

      Just like Obama is a racist trying to loot Medicare. And John Kerry was a coward rather than a war hero.

    • Warwhatgoodfor

      Damn straight. Got me seventeen of them this weekend, and still got Sunday to go. Yup. Fuckin' A.

  • Steverino247

    “There are no words for this — it is just nuts,” said Dr. Michael Greene, a professor of obstetrics, gynecology and reproductive biology at Harvard Medical School.

    There's your headline for every newspaper in America tomorrow.

    • Fukui-sanYesOta

      Except the WSJ: "Rape-comment candidate stands firm; donations increase"

    • http://citizenfuturist.wordpress.com/ gogogodzilla

      Stupid expert. What does he know.

    • Geminisunmars

      Isn't he also one of the scientists who has disproven Global Warming?

    • comrad_darkness

      Hah. If only.

  • Tequila Mockingbird
    • SorosBot

      Hey I posted that one in a morning thread!

      • Tequila Mockingbird

        Whoops, sorry, Soros, I didn't see it, honest. Great minds, etc. I just found the article myself a few minutes ago.

        • SorosBot

          Nah, just teasing; it's not like it was here, no one can be expected to read every comment on every post.

          • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

            I swear, you can't hardly tease ANYbuddy around here, wut with peeps taking you all seriously and stuff.

    • T3rbo

      http://www.theonion.com/articles/i-misspokewhat-i

      You see, what I said was, “If it’s a legitimate rape, the female body has ways to try to shut that whole thing down.” But what I meant to say was, “I am a worthless, moronic sack of shit and an utterly irredeemable human being who needs to shut up and go away forever.”

    • WhatTheHolyHeck

      Countdown until it hits Literally Unbelievable.

      Edit: Wow, that was fast.

      • viennawoods13

        Favorite line…. "Those poor diluted people."

  • fartknocker

    This guy is starting to look and sound like Jerry Sandusky. And Rinse Prebus is shitting porcupine needles every time this guy speaks.

    • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

      Maybe we can get Bob Costas to interview him.

      • http://wonkette.com/ Sharkey

        Or Chris Hansen!

    • http://wonkette.com/ FlownOver

      Lather, Reince, repeat.

    • Rotundo_

      For that reason, and that reason alone, I am enjoying this; the mental image of Reince with a load of quills in his nasty just makes me beam. I am beginning to wonder how much longer the establishment republicans will put up with these hayseeds and do to them what was done with the S.A. by the Nazis when they were no longer of use.

    • One_who_wanders

      That is the best part of this watching the GOP squirm.

      I like this: http://www.newyorker.com/online/blogs/closeread/2

  • anniegetyerfun

    I missed this, because I was busy being drunk and sexin' ladies, but back in 1998, Fay Boozman lost a Senate race after making similar stupid comments (apparently Magic Rape Shutdown Vaginas are a common idea in conservative Science?).

    Whatever became of Boozman? Oh, Huckabee hired him to serve Arkansas' Health Department.

    I fucking HATE that there are people out there who believe that Huckabee is anything other than an extremely dangerous demagogue. He supports these nutjobs 100%.

    • emmelemm

      Why is a dude named Fay?

      • anniegetyerfun

        Saxby. Lindsey. Fay. There is no pattern there.

        • emmelemm

          I know, I know…

          I've never heard of a girl named Saxby (but then again, I'm not from the South), and at least there's Lindsey/Lindsay to differentiate…

          • anniegetyerfun

            I know a couple female “Lindsey”s, so I say it's a pointless differentiation now.

      • http://wonkette.com Lionel[redacted]Esq

        Part fairy?

        • emmelemm

          Almost certainly.

        • Rotundo_

          Just the reproductive organs.

      • zippy_w_pinhead

        the parents didn't quite get the hang of the whole baby naming thing until his younger brother John was born

      • Geminisunmars

        His parents had already named his brother Gay?

        • emmelemm

          Hah! Good one.

      • Chichikovovich

        His parents named him after Autos-de-Fé

        • Geminisunmars

          Is his nick-name Cars?

    • http://inappropriatejobpostings.blogspot.com/ fuflans

      being drunk and sexin ladies is a much better way to go thru life than paying attention to fay boozeman.

      or mike huckabee.

    • rickmaci

      The religious conservatards have been floating this one since, well the Middle Ages. Back then the idea was if a woman got pregnant it couldn't be a rape because fertilization could not occur without orgasm happy sperms and eggs. Of course they also thought the earth was flat, the sun revolved around the earth…

      • sullivanst

        They also hadn't the first idea how babby was formed. The Aristotelian belief that male ejaculate contained fully formed microhumans and women were merely incubators prevailed until at least, what, the 18th or 19th century?

        • viennawoods13

          And yet they still blamed the wimmen for birthin girls instead of boys.

        • Boojum

          So, masturbating created mobs, with tiny pitchforks?

      • FlyOverGirl

        You mean like they did last week?

    • T3rbo

      Oh, you didn't know? Huckabee has an honorary degree (PhD) in lady parts from Bob Jones University

    • Negropolis

      Fay? Seriously?

      BTW, Huckabee is totally unthreatening because he smiles when he says horrible things. Also, because he plays the guitar. Too.

      • anniegetyerfun

        Yes, that's why my mother keeps telling me he's the “good kind of conservative.”

  • Major Thom

    Douchebag says what??

  • LastGasp

    There isn’t any legitimate rapist
    Not yet, but if the Republicans win in November expect for them to create the post of Legitimate Rapist, a government-funded job for die-hard misogynists.

    • PubOption

      I assume that candidates must show their parents' marriage license.

    • http://www.southsidejohnny.com/ Jukesgrrl

      Part of the Office of Faith-based Initiatives.

    • Negropolis

      This one hundred times over.

  • Blueb4sinrise

    That man is a danger to other people.

    • tonydefined

      most republicans are bad for people

  • Fukui-sanYesOta

    Even Willard has just said he should quit the race.

    This non-apology is awesome. "Hey, I said some stuff, and people were angry, but I was right. Also, too, I meant something else which I didn't even talk about because elect me!"

    This addled filthyweasel needs to be writing illiterate letters to small-town newspapers, not running for office.

    • SorosBot

      Well of course Willard wants him to quit the race; when it comes to destroying women's rights Akin and Ryan have worked together for years, and support the same policies and believe the same things, Ryan just hasn't said anything quite as overtly woman-hating and Romney doesn't want to remind voters of his running mate's medieval views on women.

      • Callyson

        That's because they prefer having those discussions in a quiet room somewhere.

        Assholes.

      • Boojum

        He's running for President, for Pete's sake!

    • Geminisunmars

      "needs to be writing illegitimate letters"

      fixt

      • Fukui-sanYesOta

        forcibly illegitimate letters?

    • zippy_w_pinhead

      writing illiterate letters to small-town newspapers is HOW you run for office. in Missouri

    • Mojopo

      I agree, and for saying, "Right, right," Dana Loesch should buy his word processor. BE his word processor.

    • Chichikovovich

      Though one should also observe that Mitt didn't ask him to resign his seat in the House. Or not run for reelection there.*

      *Hat tip to Balloon Juice.

    • http://www.southsidejohnny.com/ Jukesgrrl

      Willard wants him to quit the race so the bad publicity will stop but Willard is simultaneously happy to have all of Akin's batshit crazee ideas written into the Republican platform.

      As usual with Rmoney, right is left, left is right, and vice versa at the same time.

    • sullivanst

      Willard wants Akin to stop generating headlines that reveal the true agenda of the Republican party, is all.

      This is the classic political gaffe: saying what you believe when you didn't mean to.

      • Negropolis

        Isn't it crazy that in politics, a "gaffe" is when you tell the truth?!

    • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

      He needs to be hoofin' around town askin' folks to hold his cock and pullet while he scratches his ass. (I think I got that from J_W, blame him.)

  • PsycWench

    Well, I'm sure that made the RNC so much more willing to throw money at him, now that he's explained how women lie about rape and all.

    • zippy_w_pinhead

      give it two weeks- that money will all be back. once the power brokers realize he's called their bluff and ain't quitting (they have zero leverage on this goober), they'll quietly go back to funding his campaign. They REALLY want that Senate seat

      • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

        They're REALLY not lookin' so good to get it. The wimminz has fled from the fucker's campaign like ants from poisoned bait. His support among ladyparts-owners has dropped to 30% or below. Last I heard, it's still dropping, since he can't stop explicatamating hisself.

    • Warwhatgoodfor

      Well, hell yes. He's just defending the honor of southern gentlemen.

    • zwoits

      the sluts

  • http://lostintarnation.blogspot.com/ SayItWithWookies

    Wow. This motherfucker must've set an endurance record for being stupid without having decapitated himself with a chainsaw by now. I am just stunned.

    • Jus_Wonderin

      I have to think the only way he could be decapitated with a chainsaw is if he got his tongue wrapped round his eyetooth and fell on to it. Or, if some disgusted woman type helped him out.

      • zippy_w_pinhead

        or if he found himself handcuffed in the back seat of a squad car in Arkansas- these things happen ya know…

        • Boojum

          Obvious suicide.

          And I think you meant "black seat".

        • Negropolis

          That is a horribly appropriate zing.

  • http://inappropriatejobpostings.blogspot.com/ fuflans

    it's almost 5 PM MO. do you know where your senate candidates are?

    • zippy_w_pinhead

      inside someone's uterus?

  • http://zvibleindmeis.tumblr.com/ Spurning Beer

    I remember hearing as a student of anthropology long ago that in South Sea island cultures where active sexuality among young adolescents is socially sanctioned, pregnancy was rare for reasons that were not understood. I have no reason to believe that this is more plausible than Mr. Akins' theory, but it seems to be completely the opposite — it wasn't forcible sex that was unlikely to produce pregnancy, but enthusiastic youthful sex.

    • http://lostintarnation.blogspot.com/ SayItWithWookies

      Are you thinking of Margaret Meade's Coming of Age in Samoa? After her death it was discovered that the girls who were her sources were probably making stuff up for their own amusement and Meade bought it.

    • Geminisunmars

      I know that I hardly ever got pregnant when I was having enthusiastic youthful sex.

      • http://wonkette.com Lionel[redacted]Esq

        Sadly, I was alone when I was having enthusiastic youthful sex.

        • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

          *whew*

          I thought it was just me

        • Geminisunmars

          That is sad. I hope you are making up for it now.

      • elviouslyqueer

        I continue to have enthusiastic youthful sex, and I've never gotten pregnant!

        Wait, what?

        • Geminisunmars

          Must be those spastic tubules of yours.

    • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

      What Wooks said, and also too, at least in the communal dwellings of tribal peoples in India and much of Southeast Asia, the whole purpose of allowing boys and girls to leave their natal homes and have enthusiastic sex without their disapproving parental units around is to ensure that the young couple is compatible sexually as well as in other ways, to take the edge off the tremendous hormonal rush of youth at that age, and *to determine that the couple is fertile.* Having a low rate of pregnancy would hardly be helpful under the circs.

  • bikerlaureate

    Looking for more tidbits of widsom from Huckabee, I found this steaming pile:

    Akin said he was not the only candidate ever to “suffer from foot-in-mouth disease,”

    Just… just wow.

    adding: “The good people of Missouri nominated me and I’m not a quitter."

    .

    Maybe we need to popularize and market a movement to reform the Confederate States of America (which, Wikipedia tells me, includes this Show-Me Wasteland, "claimed by the CSA without formal secession and/or control".) Right at this moment I'm not snarking.

    • http://dismalpseudoscientist.wordpress.com Incitefully_Joe

      I have difficulty believing that good is a word that can be used to describe the people of Missouri who nominated him.

    • Callyson

      Akin said he was not the only candidate ever to “suffer from foot-in-mouth disease”

      The scary thing is that he is right about that much:

      Todd Akin hasn't lost all his friends, yet.
      Rep. Steve King (R-Iowa) weighed in on the controversy surrounding Akin's rape comments on Monday, defending the embattled Missouri Senate candidate as a "strong Christian man" in an appearance on KMEG News…
      King said he did not know the full context of Akin's remarks, but characterized the criticism as "petty, personal attacks."

      http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/08/21/steve-ki

      Asshole.

      • http://www.southsidejohnny.com/ Jukesgrrl

        Typical Steve King, "I don't know anything about that, but I won't let it stop me from having an opinion."

        • sullivanst

          If he merely had an opinion it wouldn't be so bad, but Steve King can't have an opinion without feeling compelled to vomit it all over the public.

      • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

        Don't worry about it. There's some boiling mad LayDeez out there just spilin' for a fight, and they appear to have Rep. King's tentacles firmly in their grasp. He'll be singing in E above high C any minute now. As for Akin, there is SO much vituperation being directed his way that I'm no longer sure he *can* hold his seat. Consider, for instance, that the Akin-friendly media is now referring to Akin's opponent as "the formerly-vulnerable incumbent," and take heart. Rep. King might just find his own seat endangered next.

        In more good news, Michele Bachmann's numbers have fallen so low in recent polling that even her backers are beginning to think she's vulnerable to a take-down. Good times, good times. (chuckles evilly)

        • HistoriCat

          Stop it – you're getting my hopes up.

          • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

            I'm not staying behind in this world if you're not in it. It's as simple as that. (Hugs HistoriCat fondly)

    • Dudleydidwrong

      Both Fuckabee and Akin are steaming piles. Fuckabee seems to be saying that we need more forcible rapes to create good, god-fearing people. Both of these men are dog vomit and yet some call them "Christian leaders."

    • Dashboard Buddha

      So basically, what Huck is saying is if you get raped, make rape-ade?

      • http://www.southsidejohnny.com/ Jukesgrrl

        And he prays to Jesus that you'll be making that rapeade yourself without any help from evil Obamacare or any of those other Socialist programs promoted by Democrats.

    • shelwood46

      IFC is running the Spike Lee produced movie "CSA" again on Thursday. It's an interesting watch, basically positing that the CSA won the war and ran the (old) US from 1865 on. It's a "fun" thought experiment, and it's interspersed with fake ads for real racist products.

      • viennawoods13

        I watched it the other day on youtube when someone here (maybe you?) mentioned it. IIt is definitely interesting.

  • Monsieur_Grumpe

    I suspect he’s a product of home schooled sex education.

    • LocalGirlMakesGoo

      Buttsecks Baby Libel!

    • http://wonkette.com Lionel[redacted]Esq

      As was Jerry Falwell.

    • Mittens Howell, III

      A home schooled sex education would be a necessary qualification in order to vote for this guy.

  • mrpuma2u

    Why isn't he hiding in his basement? This guy had a shame-ectomy done by some faith healer surgeon or something. What an epic tool.

    • Meatsticks

      Why are we not running these people out of town with pitchforks and torches? Serious, wtf?

  • SorosBot

    Yeah, I'm sure women lie about being raped all the time, considering how society constantly condemns rape victims, accuses them of lying, calls them sluts and most of the time the rapists end up going scott free.

    • shelwood46

      Of course. It's just like all those people choosing the wonderful lifestyle of being a gay, because of all the respect and special privileges they get.

  • WhatTheHeck

    This guy just keeps digging deeper and deeper into that hole.
    One day soon he’ll emerge in China.

    • doloras

      合法强奸

    • Veritas78

      I'm sure they'll appreciate his constructive thoughts about how their one-child policy is achieved.

  • RadioBowels

    Yes, finally, a poster child for the wingtards.

  • Goonemeritus

    There are so many things in the world that are beyond my comprehension, I am however very sure that Crises Management team advising Congressman Akin’s is not earning their keep.

    • MaxNeanderthal

      Ah, this is the new tactic, the "non-apology apology", (copyright: R Murdoch), aka, the "I was wrong but not really wrong, only wrongly misquoted out of context" defence

      • tessiee

        "I am truly, deeply sorry that the mic was on."

  • Antispandex

    I fondly remember when America had two parents, not just the drunken pissed off dad (male republicans). I guess my granddaughters will have to do all of that silly bra burning crap all over again just so people will not say to them, "Well in those clothes, of course you got raped". Well…unless…what's the christian version of the burka?

    • LocalGirlMakesGoo

      No shoes.

      • Advn2rgirl

        Magic underwear/garments.

    • Neoyorquino

      Embroidered denim jumper.

    • doloras
    • http://www.southsidejohnny.com/ Jukesgrrl

      Those look-alike plaid cotton dresses the Santorum girls wear.

  • PsycWench

    I can't believe an actual physician said the things Dr. Wilkie said, but then there are a few Ph.D. biologists that don't believe in evolution. I put them in the same category as the psychologist who thought there was no such thing as mental illness.

    • Steverino247

      The doctor in question is 87, and old doctors sometimes resort to witch craft and shamanism…

      • http://dismalpseudoscientist.wordpress.com Incitefully_Joe

        Isn't he also an opthalmologist?

        What is it about opthalmologists, anyway?

        • Dudleydidwrong

          I think he's a GP with "training in obstetrics." This means that he watched "My Mom's Having a Baby" years ago on TV.

      • Fox E. Puppet

        If he was born in 1925, he probably attended med school in the late 40's/early 50's. He was a Family Medicine doc, not an OB/Gyn, so far as I can tell, so who knows how much time he spent learning about reproductive issues, or- more to the point- what doctors were being taught about female reproduction at the time?

    • http://www.facebook.com/pages/Johnny-Appletruth/133951326629923?sk=wall deanbooth

      Calling Doctor Howard, Doctor Fine, Doctor Howard…

    • Warwhatgoodfor

      Uh, Mengele was also a doctor. This is relevant because if you pop over to Rawstory, some of the data doc wilke supposedly used came from experiments done on starving women in the death camps. Seems they took ladies who were due to ovulate and put them through a simulated gassing. Damned if they didn' t ovulate at all. Well controlled and peer reviewed I'm sure.

      • Boojum

        Of course, starvation will do that, too.

    • sullivanst

      Can't find where Dr. Willke was "educated", but the following bits of biographical info do feature prominently:

      – Founder and President, International Right to Life Foundation;
      – President, Life Issues Institute;
      – Formerly President (for 10 years), National Right to Life Foundation

      The guy is a lifelong forced birther.

    • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/2012/06/introducing-bad-note-millstones-of-jazz.html Chet Kincaid_

      I'm nitpicking, but I really dislike that formulation "believe in evolution."

    • tessiee

      Meh, doctors can be stupid asses, too.
      A friend I went to high school with posted on facebook that flu shots make you ten times more likely to get Alzeheimer's, according to Dr. Somebody or other, "The world's leading immuno-geneticist, with 80 peer reviewed papers.

      I never get flu shots anyway, but I googled it, and turns out that Dr. Somebody or other not only co-authored the original study about mercury in vaccinations, which has been debunked many times over, but was also found guilty of professional misconduct — in South Carolina, yet! — and had his license suspended.

      • PsycWench

        Sounds like Andrew Wakefield. He's a piece of work. I guess I tend to think that if a person has gotten an education he or she would use it, but I am constantly proven wrong.

  • coolhandnuke

    After adding a steaming load of 9/11 sanctimonious blather to his rapey walk-back, will Akin correct himself by saying the Twin Towers were "forcibly" violated by two volatile high-speed phallic objects?

    • Geminisunmars

      That sounds legitimate.

  • zippy_w_pinhead

    This is the new GOP pivot- it's everywhere. It's really all you promiscuous God hating LaDee sLuTs who entice those poor Christian men with your sinfully short skirts and offers to drink the cocktails they innocently buy for you who then force yourselves upon them with your harlot charms, causing them to have sex with you even though they didn't want to (of course YOU wanted it, it goes without saying, Missy Jezebel). Then you lie and cry rape once the unquenchable heat of your LaDee passion has subsided as a means to attack and punish these poor upright Christian menfolk for falling victim to your sinister wiles. You and the snake have been at it for eons (or at least 6000 years)

  • proudgrampa

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
    *NO, NO PLEASE, I CAN'T STAND THIS ANYMORE! STOP!!*
    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

    Proudgrampa finally goes over the edge.

  • Fox E. Puppet

    Okay, so the Tubes were pretty spastic, but what does that have to do with raped women not getting pregnant, Dr. Wilke?

    • http://wonkette.com/ FlownOver

      Fee Waybill libel!

      • tessiee

        White Dopes on Punk

    • MosesInvests

      She won't even miss me when she's gone, that's OK with me, I'll cry later on….

  • comrad_darkness

    Bully pulpits should be a requirement for every candidate so the swing voters who get to screw us all over can't pretend they don't know what they were voting for.

  • Barrelhse

    Phenomenal.

  • http://johnnyzhivago.blogspot.com johnnyzhivago

    This all Obama's fault somehow.

    • http://wonkette.com Lionel[redacted]Esq

      Why won't Obama talk about the issues, instead of raping women?

    • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

      He dressed provocatively. He was just asking for it.

    • zippy_w_pinhead

      But it's good news for John McCain

    • RadioBowels

      You mean the "baby killer" Obama??!?

    • Negropolis

      Something something he gets the ladies wet, something something he's illegitimate.

  • littlebigdaddy

    Needz moar vagina dentatas!

    • zippy_w_pinhead

      are those vaginas that have been cooked so as to be firm but not hard?

      • proudgrampa

        They are excellent with an Alfredo sauce.

        • http://wonkette.com/ FlownOver

          Is that what that stuff is?

        • zippy_w_pinhead

          those sperm gotta have something to swim in…

        • tessiee

          Flying Spaghetti Monster approves of this comment.

          • proudgrampa

            May you be touched by his Noodly Appendage.

  • http://wonkette.com Lionel[redacted]Esq

    All the cool girls are lying about rape so that they can have abortions. Why won't anyone but the GOP stand up against this? Thank God it is in their platform.

    • T3rbo

      FREE ABORTION????!!!!! ALL I HAVE TO DO IS LIE???? I'LL TAKE 10!

  • HarryButtle

    If you can't pass a junior high health test about where babbies come from, you can't serve in the legislature and write laws that affect other people's reproductive rights. Period.

    • Geminisunmars

      Yah? You and what army are gonna stop them?

      • HarryButtle

        I know, I know…teh stoopid is strong in Amurika. sigh

    • http://slackoftownnola.wordpress.com Comrade Wingtardd

      They need to do way instain mother!

      • tessiee

        NObody puts babby in corner.

  • StarsUponThars

    tell me more tell me more
    was it love at first sight
    tell me more tell me more
    did she put up a fight?

    • LocalGirlMakesGoo

      If her daddy's rich, take her out for a meal
      If her daddy's poor, just do what you feel.

  • T3rbo

    OH I get it, this guy thinks he mis-spoke because he called rapists legitimate by accident. He does not get that when people learn that he thinks 'most rapes' are inaccurately reported as being rapes, and the evidence of these rapes not being 'real' are pregnancies, they will consider him to be a total lunatic.
    His proof that there are very few rapes that are real is the small number of pregnancies related to 'real' rapes. What. The. Fuck. Work backwards from a conclusion much?
    Because I don't want to support abortion, there are not very many real rapes in the world. Therefore, there is no need for abortion in the case of rape. WTF.

    • calliecallie

      Kind of like the logic they used in the Salem witch trials.

      • Boojum

        Burn her!

      • Negropolis

        Oh god, the trials they would have had if Christine O'Donnell had made it to the Senate…is the reflecting pond deep enough to submerge the accused? I guess they could always do dunking in the Potomac if push came to shove, or a dropping from the top f the Washington Monument.

    • tracyhasfun

      nailed it

  • Estproph

    Moral: never pay attention to "scientific facts" given by people who believe Elvis now lives in a UFO.

  • kingofmeh

    i just searched for the word "rape" in the opinion in roe v. wade, and it appears twice. once in a footnote describing the ABA's proposed Uniform Abortion Act, and once in the text, describing the AMA's recommendations on abortion.

    both citations are merely tangential references in the context of a very long opinion. roe v. wade wasn't a case about rape, nor were there any lies about rape involved in the case. jane roe never alleged anything other than that she was unmarried, pregnant, and wished to terminate her pregnancy.

    • T3rbo

      you and your facts!

    • Tequila Mockingbird

      Doktor Zoom explained this in a post above… Norma McCorvey (aka Jane Roe) did initially (and falsely) claim rape in order to procure a Texas abortion, under a misguided belief that she could legally obtain an abortion that way, as well as to lessen the stigma of being an unwed mother in the 1960s. Her attorneys wisely left mention of rape out of the court documents, which is why the topic isn't addressed in the opinion. However, McCorvey's false rape cry has become a touchstone for anti-choicers ever since.

      • sullivanst

        Despite its total irrelevance to the Supreme Court decision.

  • http://wonkette.com Lionel[redacted]Esq

    While I appreciate my fellow Wonketters commenting on how stupid Congressman Akin is, it should be pointed out that a majority of Republicans are nodding their heads and thinking at last someone has the guts to take on the MSM and tell the truth.

    • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

      I don't think it's a majority of Republicans. Teabaggers, yea, I can see that.

      • HistoriCat

        Majority of ordinary Republicans – the Repub leaders wish he would shut the hell up so that the idiots who could vote for either candidate will be lulled back into complacency.

        Poor Akin – he's a true believer. It's not his fault that that the national Republican leaders are cynical assholes who really don't care about his social issues.

    • HempDogbane

      and that it's a sin to know and understand biology, sexuality, science, other cultures, history…

  • http://citizenfuturist.wordpress.com/ gogogodzilla

    Awesome! Keep talking, Todd.

  • Lucidamente1

    Also, it's not rape if it's performed by one of them sovereign citizens, right?

    • zippy_w_pinhead

      it's not taxable rape

    • sullivanst

      It's only rape if they signed a contract not to make sexytime with you against your will.

  • anniegetyerfun

    I went to school with a couple of girls who gave birth to their fathers' children while in high school. I am relieved now to know that I can quit blaming the grown men who raped their daughters, and place the blame squarely on the shoulders of those then 15 year-old girls.

    • Geminisunmars

      Aren't you afraid of being contaminated by association with those trollops? It does not reflect well upon you, so I would just hush about all that.

    • T3rbo

      Well, I am sure that if this happened to Mr. Akin, he would do what Jesus commanded. He would have that baby.

    • Warwhatgoodfor

      "Janie got a gun". Problem solved.

    • CivicHoliday

      don't punish the unborn babies for the actions of a few Lolita daughters

  • StealthMuslin

    Teach the controversy! Through early November!

  • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

    Welp, by my watch, he's got an hour and a quarter to get out of the race. Is there anyway we can, you know, steal his cellphone until then?

  • prommie

    Remember, "No Means Yes!" Cause, you know the slut wanted it.

  • Guppy

    There isn’t any legitimate rapist

    Because phrases like "marital rape" are oxymorons.

  • http://wonkette.com ManchuCandidate

    His mouth is writing checks his uterine lining can't cash.

  • Callyson

    thoroughly discredited opinions of Dr. John C. Willke, who first popularized the notion that ladyparts magically prevent pregnancy in a rape

    Aaaand *this* is why allowing people to homeschool their kids and accrediting fundie "universities" is a bad idea–you end up with people who buy into this crap.

  • BigSkullF*ckingDog

    I like to head down to the police station once a month and get a rape kit done, just for the lulz.

    • Jus_Wonderin

      I remember the time my wife and I scrimped and saved for the "My First Rape Kit" for our daugther. She keeps it in the trunk, where she used to keep the tire iron, which she keeps tucked between the seat and the console.

    • IonaTrailer

      It helps with the rectal bleeding.

  • Fox n Fiends

    Speaking of Roe v Wade, have you ever read the Wiki of Norma McCorvey? wowza.

  • Baconzgood

    It's such a tight rope appeasing the Midwest Right and the rest of…SANE FUCKING PEOPLE!!!!!!!!

  • Blunderthing

    There was no need for Todd Akin to look up from sucking a dick as the dick was sucking itself and his mouth just happened to fall on it, according to a dick sucking expert. The end.

  • mavenmaven

    Given what these loons believe on this matter, its no surprise that they believe all that other crazy horse$%&t proposed by the likes of Paul Ryan, etc.
    Scary.

  • keinsignal

    OK, off topic but today's Pioneer Press headline is, and I quote, "Blahs Greet New Best Buy CEO". Thanks to our Wonkette, I completely misinterpreted it, of course.

    • Geminisunmars

      I get the Blahs now and then too.

      • Callyson

        The fact that I share a planet with the likes of Todd Akin is giving me the Blahs.

      • Negropolis

        That's good, because so few people understand the Blahs.

        • http://www.indiegogo.com/revive-vlad Doktor Zoom

          Or as the Bonzo Dog Band asked, "Can Blah Men Sing the Whuts?"

  • mustangsavvy

    Holy fuckballs, I can't even…..

  • http://grandpaboy.blogspot.com/ seppdecker

    This schmuck is a stone's throw away from, "Throw her in the lake! If she sinks, she'll go to Heaven as a maiden. And if she floats, she lied about being raped!"

  • http://wonkette.com/ weejee

    Well today is Tuesday, so Akin has 50 minutes to bail, or the D'Ratz will be 'bout guaranteed to maintain control of the Senate. Will our Wonkette live blog the last 15 minutes? If Akin doesn't quit the race, do we consider making him an honorary D'Rat as thanks for his unfaltering stupidity?

    • Geminisunmars

      Bite your tongue. He will never be an honorary anything, ever.

      • http://wonkette.com/ weejee

        I see your point. Then how about making him a dishonorary D'Rat or some other means to acknowledge how helpful his being an over-the-top big stupid really is to we librulz?

        • Generation[redacted]

          How about we give him an honorary kick in the nuts?

          Better yet, let a rape victim do it. Form a line, ladies.

        • Geminisunmars

          Don't tell anyone, but he is actually a D'rat mole, emplaced many years ago for just such an occassion when we needed to discredit the entire Republican species. We want him to keep going on and on, but we don't want to bring too much attention to his background.

  • annettaj

    Every time I hear Akin, its a kiss my ass moment.

  • T3rbo

    The irony of this is, people like my moms, who lives in MO, used to really identify with the republican cause. She was really into St. Regan, and thought Clinton was pretty slimy, but since the Iraq War, she has reconsidered her political affiliation and is now an independent.
    I am 100% certain that this guy does not get my mom's vote now, no matter what, and I am going to bet that guys like this are going to send reasonable women away from the party of conservative values. Men, in Missouri, where I am from, not so much. But women, probably yes. There are only so many poor blahs you can blame for the economy and get a right wing woman's vote after this

    • http://www.southsidejohnny.com/ Jukesgrrl

      I hope you're right. But I still fear he will be bounced from the race.

  • http://inappropriatejobpostings.blogspot.com/ fuflans

    well this is going well.

  • Exhausted66

    Bottom line. Is he or is he not speaking at the convention?

    • IonaTrailer

      Somewhere Karl Rove is grinding his teeth and yelling into the telephone at Akin, "You don't talk about this shit, we just do this shit after we get elected, you idiot."

  • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212
    • http://sciencekick.blogspot.com valthemus

      No wonder Akin is staying in the race… look at the dream team of august men he has on his side:

      Steve "Yes I sound crazy but let them prove it in court" King, Kirk "Hollywood is too sinful, that's why I can't get work" Cameron, and Tony "Not the dead gay actor who I'm glad is dead because I hates me some homos and love the Klan" Perkins.

      There are no winners in a field of losers.

    • Boojum

      Apey Rapey hearts. Evolution and 'bortion two-fer!

  • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

    Wow. When Jan Brewer is the voice of reason…

    • Geminisunmars

      Her saying that what Akin said is "a little outrageous", is like a rape victim saying she is "a little bit pregnant."

      • sullivanst

        Or that the attack itself was "mildly unpleasant".

    • HarryButtle

      See, you had me all excited. I hadn't heard what my glorious governor had said about this and I thought by your comment that she actually took a stand contrary to the Republican Party line.

      Alas, she pretty much answered in her typical, dimwitted non-committal way. Because she hasn't been told what she thinks, yet.

    • Boojum

      Jan knows she is safe from rape, legitimate or illegitimate. Even the Wonketteers would not take that one for the team.

  • rickmaci

    The leading cause of death for children between the ages of 2 and 15 in the United States is car crashes. Each day, about 500 children are injured in car crashes. Holy babyjeezuzinamanager, look at what Obama did by protecting the auto industry. Carnage of the innocents. Constitutional amendment to ban automobiles, NOW.

    • tessiee

      Silly person.
      Don't ban cars.
      Just ban seat belts and ambulances.
      Seat belts encourage people (especially unmarried teenagers) to drive carelessly, and ambulances keep them from facing the consequences of their actions.

      • Boojum

        You have captured the Republican essence. Now, quickly, incinerate it.

  • http://protoplasm.wordpress.com/ Preacher_Griz

    I hope that romney fellow Sees the Light and gets behind Rep Todd instead of throwing him under the bus.

    And that romney fellow might want to Learn some History and let Rep Paul Ryan take the lead in the campaign. If that mccain fellow had let Gov Mother Sarah Palin take charge, he'd be getting his mails at a different address.

    • Boojum

      Prison?

  • Tundra Grifter

    For about the past five years, the gold standard of stupid when it comes to rape victims was established by Duh Gov'. When she was the mayor of Wasilla, the city started charging them for rape kits.

    Thanks to Rep. Akin, today that doesn't even move the needle.

  • http://howtosavetheworld.ca/ BZ1

    hey guy, in the hole, time to stop diggin'

    • tessiee

      Let him enjoy it; it's the only hole he's ever going to be in.

  • pdiddycornchips

    There can be only two reasons this guy keeps eating up the daily news cycle with his magic vagina sermons.

    1). The Godfather next door in Illinois got to him

    2). Mittens has larger tax problems than even we imagine.

    • http://www.southsidejohnny.com/ Jukesgrrl

      The tax returns.

    • Boojum

      He has produced exactly one, incomplete return. Mittens, produce the rest of 2010!!!

      • not that Dewey

        He claims he will produce a second return, 2011, in late October, after it's too late to mean anything.

  • GeorgiaBurning

    Fringe political movements in the US used to either die out or become absorbed and moderated by one of the major parties. What we are seeing now is the reverse of that. The atavistic side of right-wing politics has swallowed the Republican Party whole. If this sort of stuff came out of a candidate from the Free Male Christian Party we'd shake our heads and snicker; probably forget the guy's name in a day or so. The "Republican" brand name still carries recognition and stature, but it's just a sticker on some cheap pieces of crappy thought from the intellectual equivalent of a third-rate Chinese knock-off factory.

  • ChrisM2011

    Jesus, it's like a sport with these clowns. You actually have conservatives spinning rape!

    Granted these entire story is disgusting but a part of me can't wait to see just how deep into the rabbit hole these cock knockers go with their spin.

    • http://sciencekick.blogspot.com valthemus

      When it was announced that newly-minted VP candidate Sarah Palin's unmarried teenage daughter was pregnant, Neil Cavuto said, "In a way, it's a good thing this happened. It just shows Palin is human and has problems like everybody else." Having an agenda and no shame allows for really, really, really, really, really deep rabbit holes of spin.

      • http://sciencekick.blogspot.com valthemus

        And it should be noted that, if so many on the right didn't oppose comprehensive sex education, you wouldn't have so many randy teenagers running around believing girls can't get pregnant the first time they have sex.

  • Angry_Marmot

    As someone who wants the Republicans to lose as many seats as possible, I urge Rep. Akin to hang in there 'til election day, running his mouth, showing up at rallies and posing with every candidate in the country, flailing and flailing and flailing… He should live and be well.

  • Warco3

    Is it too early to congratulate Senator McCaskill on her victory?

    • http://www.southsidejohnny.com/ Jukesgrrl

      Unfortunately, yes.

  • Callyson

    IIRC, Missouri is in the Central time zone, which means 5 o'clock has come and gone and this fucker is still in it to spin it…

  • pinkocommi

    It is too bad Romney has picked his VP nominee because this Akin guy would perfectly round out the Republitard ticket.

    • Geminisunmars

      I think the one he's got has similar beliefs. Didn't they co-sponser something or other?

      • sullivanst

        Yes, a bill (not an amendment, a bill) to grant blastocysts all the constitutional rights of an adult person.

  • http://wonkette.com/ FlownOver

    Hey! HEY!!! HEY!!!!!

    He has a petition we can sign!

    • finallyhappy

      1066 signatures so far- how many are wonketteers??

      • http://wonkette.com/ FlownOver

        Well, I've heard (from a reliable source) both Mittens and Rand Ryan have signed.

    • finallyhappy

      I just signed as Roe V. Wade- roevwade@gmail.com

    • Geminisunmars

      Wow, did you notice his signature on that. It looked like Podel signed it.

      • sullivanst

        His handwriting has apparently reached the same grade level as his intellectual capacity.

    • BigSkullF*ckingDog

      I love how you can pick "I'd like to contribute to the campaign" or "No I'm not ready to contribute" and you get taken to the same page asking for your credit card. Unfortunately, Pat McGroin doesn't have any credit cards.

    • MikeHawkstrong

      As always, Mike Hawkstrong is IN!

    • Callyson

      Jinx!

      Also, as noted below, Strongwoman Isfightingback, againsthate@gop.com just signed!

    • http://www.indiegogo.com/revive-vlad Doktor Zoom

      Weedlord Bonerhitler has signed.

    • IonaTrailer

      Tiny P Enis youreadouche@bag.org signed his petition!
      So did Getoutof myuterus keepchoicelegal@women.com

    • IonaTrailer

      I'm spending all evening signing his for all my friends!
      Rapey TheRapist rapeme@rapester.net signed
      So did Getou Ofmyuterus protectchoice@DNC.org

    • Boojum

      Paul Bernardo, @Kingstonpen.com just signed.

      For a list of potential signatories, see Wiki

      Rodney Alcala InmateG18300@CalPen just signed.

    • Baba_NinjaCat12

      Use the name Moll Lester when signing it.

  • barto

    "ladies just plain lie about being raped"

    Sounds like he speaks from personal experience, perhaps?

  • Callyson

    Also, this fucker has an online petition to show support for his sorry ass:

    http://www.akin.org/still-standing

    Strongwoman Isfightingback, againsthate@gop.com just signed!

  • Kid_Charlemagne

    I be Claire McCaskill is suddenly reminded of the old SNL skit with Jon Lovitz playing Michael Dukakis during the 1988 Presidential Debate: "I can't believe I'm losing to this guy!"

    • sullivanst

      Claire McCaskill is one of the main reasons Akin was able to make a late surge past two better-polling primary opponents to seal the nomination. Well, her and the DNC.

  • KeepFnThatChicken

    Did he realize he was on the radio? And does she realize she has a vagina…?!

  • Not_Mother

    It would be funny if Akin told Romney, "I'll drop out if you release your tax returns".

  • sullivanst

    Of fucking course Bryan Fischer was the first to cite "Dr" Willke in support of Todd Akin.

    Because the FRC was fucking invented to cite junk science from fucking scumsucking douchewad assholes with letters after their name in support of the "religious" right's agenda of hate, discrimination and persecution. That's it's entire raison d'etre. That's the "research" that gives them their name: making shit totally up, and arguing form authority, because fucking Liberty jesusfellating U hands out doctorates to hatespreading godboys like a Vegas pimp hands out "business" cards.

    These. Pricks. Make. Me. HANGRY!

    • Barrelhse

      I can go along with that.

  • spends2much

    Legitimate rape: Finally, a method of birth control the GOP can get behind!

    Scumbags.

  • Toomush_Infer

    Well, I've had two days to think about it, and I have to conclude that Akin was right: raped women's bodies do have a way to do something to stop pregnancy…..it's called abortion….

    • Boojum

      I regret that I have but one upfist to give for your comment.

  • LibertyLover

    Why is ANYONE being preggers and whether or not they want to continue to BE preggers ANY business of this clown?

  • BarackMyWorld

    HOW THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO VOTE AGAINST HIM IF HE DROPS OUT???

    (FYI The Crossroads ads already paid for are still airing here.)

  • calliecallie

    JUST STOP TALKING. Jesus, God, these fucking people.

  • http://www.indiegogo.com/revive-vlad Doktor Zoom

    Just wanted to mention that the Vlad the Impala fundraiser is finally near an end–please help an impoverished blogger pay off Wonkette-related car repairs!

  • mcrummett

    Stop digging, Todd!

  • DahBoner

    Todd Akin: Hitler's Best Used Car Salesman Ever!

    "What a creampuff rape we have out back waiting for a lady just like you"

  • viennawoods13

    I wish I had a daughter so I could forbid her to marry him.

  • TxSpinyLizrd

    Everybody just back the truck up a minute. We're letting this jackass hijack the national conversation about abortion rights and turn it into a semantics argument on the definition of rape. The next step is people will be saying, like Romney, that "ok, we'll allow it, but only in case of rape.".

    Women currently have the right to manage our own bodies without having to explain to anyone the circumstances of our condition or decision.

    Letting these misogynists move the conversation anywhere to the right of that with red herrings about my magical Fallopian tubes or whether my pregnancy was due to force or coercion is a HUGE mistake.

    • comrad_darkness

      I viewed this as a much overdue conversation questioning why these morans are making decisions for the rest of us rather than someone with a grasp of reality and science.

  • mbobier
  • mbobier
  • fartknocker

    He's a Teatard and he can't spell.
    http://twitter.com/daveweigel/statuses/2380215844

  • PuglyDoRight

    "Dr." Wilke spoke to my Catholic girls high school at an assembly decades ago and asserted that women don't get pregnant from rape because the rapist never ejaculates. The lady representing the rape crisis center nearly had a stroke right on the stage, and very helpfully pointed out that it was not, in fact, true. What a douche.

    • sullivanst

      He's also over the years claimed it's because rape is mostly buttsecks, and that rapists are mostly impotent.

      Gee, you think his shifting rationales in the face of repeatedly being battered down by the facts might be a hint that he's not trying to promote a scientific viewpoint but rather advance a forced-birth agenda by any means necessary?

  • HogeyeGrex

    This guy is really bucking for Most Loathsome Shit Of The Year.

    It's a hell of a field, too.

  • BTWBFDIMHO

    True. Democrats lie about Global Warming, and women lie about Local Warming.

  • rocktonsam

    since this asshole has taken some heat off the guys with tax problems and health care problems, Akin just got himself the secretary of HHS, job in the Rmoney/ Eddie Munster admin.

    • http://johnnyzhivago.blogspot.com johnnyzhivago

      More like Presidential Science Advisor!!!!!!!!!!

    • ProgressiveInga

      NASA Director!

  • http://www.flickr.com/photos/30500320@N06/ DerrickWildcat

    LOL, Limbaugh handed the election to that Catskill lady last time and now this guy is handing it to her this time.

    • Fox E. Puppet

      I sincerely hope you are correct, but there are crazy amounts of one-issue voters out there, and usually that one issue is abortion.

      • Negropolis

        Didn't Claire only win by a few thousand votes, last time? I'm definitely not counting her out after this. She was in real trouble just last week, now, it's a toss-up which I think leans her way because of this stupid-assed comment by Akin. This is the kind of stuff that doesn't actually register with voters right until they mark their ballots.

  • VinnyThePooh

    I can't wait to see Akin get legitimately pepper sprayed in Tampa.

  • owhatever

    "Now, Miss, if you will stop all the crying and bleeding for a minute, will you admit that you finally just laid back and enjoyed it? And think of the joy of being able to bring another life into this world. Isn't your rapist worth at least a small 'thank you' for being the father of your child?"

  • ttommyunger

    Claire McCaskill now neck and neck with Barry for "Luckiest Politician of the Century" Crown.

  • Fox E. Puppet

    Tampa in August is likely to be pretty hot- too bad Mittie has that Akin albatross around his neck. Think his OS could overheat? http://lat.ms/OOZRqs

  • Aquarianne17

    Now, now, be nice. I'm sure he's just upset since he found out that he's the illegitimate love child of Kelsey Grammer and David Hyde-Pierce.

  • BarackMyWorld

    Ana Marie Cox is on Lawrence O'Donnell right now talking about Akin.

  • http://johnnyzhivago.blogspot.com johnnyzhivago

    My evil cousin has some thoughts on this matter:
    http://rightthinkingamerican.blogspot.com/

  • Negropolis

    I'm deciding whether or not to toss Akin a few bucks to keep him in the race. Claire did the same thing, and I'd hate to see her good money go to waste.

    • Callyson

      Way too risky–we can't take the chance on that fucker actually *winning* (shudder…)

      He's stubborn as a mule and will stay in the race–please kick those bucks to McCaskill so she can sustain the momentum this crap has given her campaign and keep this fucker out of the Senate.

  • Negropolis

    BTW, I love that even the media is focusing on his use of the word "legitimate" as opposed to the really offense and horrifying issue that this man honestly doesn't seem to know the basics of sexual reproduction. As is usual, the focus is wrong. His understanding of sexual reproduction is quite literally centuries old.

  • labman57

    Todd, do yourself a favor — STOP TALKING!

    Bottom line: according to many social conservatives — including Akin and Paul Ryan — some rapes are "rapier" than are other rapes.

    • Negropolis

      Eff that. Do us a favor and keep talking.

    • LetUsBray

      I have to disagree: The bottom line is that to these social conservatives, no one should ever be allowed to get an abortion. And if a women is pregnant from being raped, the pregnancy is proof that it wasn't a really rapey rape.

      These people are fucking monsters.

  • Fox E. Puppet

    NYT headline: "A Politician Whose Faith Is Central to His Persistence".

    • Negropolis

      Please tell me you're joking.

      • Fox E. Puppet

        I wish I were.

  • http://www.indiegogo.com/revive-vlad Doktor Zoom

    A thoughtful explanation from Free Republic:

    He tried to engage the PeePee & Cooter Party on their own turf.

    Many Republicans and conservatives don't understand the Democrats. Barack Obama, Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reid do all the complex thinking for the hive mind. The rank & file Democrats are left with that which they understand – their PeePees and their Cooters. As this is what they think about most of their day (since the important thoughts are being taken care by Big Brain Obama), they're self-anointed experts on the subject.

    So Todd Akin wanders into their playpen and presumes to tell them how their ladyparts and littleboyparts work.

    If you don't believe me, go read the comments on nearly any other site. It's all smugness about knowing more about their ladyparts than this old fossil Akin.

    EDIT: Oh dear. Then there's this comment:

    Think about it ~ most of those [TV News] commentators are known homosexuals ~ and some of them are into some fairly rough sexual practices. They only wish their own partners were as rough as they imagine Republicans are. Akin fires their imagination, but NOBODY IS WATCHING. Americans had their toleration level for gays destroyed by Ellen so there's no more room.

    EDITED EDIT: And in another thread, there's a legal scholar:

    [Mark] Levin knows the Constitution, no doubt about that. His mistake is in placing it above the Declaration, which argues that the duty of any form of government is to secure the right to life.

    • LetUsBray

      "The rank & file Democrats are left with that which they understand – their PeePees and their Cooters. As this is what they think about most of their day…"

      Sounds like someone is bitter we're getting some and he's not.

    • Fox E. Puppet

      I worry about anyone who spends much time with those Freepers…

      "I never knew anyone, that examined and deliberated about nonsense who did not believe it before the end of his enquiries." – David Hume

      • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/2012/06/introducing-bad-note-millstones-of-jazz.html Chet Kincaid_

        Fear of other people's ideas just on the basis that you might agree with them? That seems closed-minded. Any side can use that argument. It's not a true statement either, from my experience.

        • Fox E. Puppet

          "Fear of other people's ideas" ≠ concern over the effects of spending a lot of time examining nonsense…

    • sullivanst

      Dude, you gotta be real careful hanging out at that place, that shit's infectious ya know?

    • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/2012/06/introducing-bad-note-millstones-of-jazz.html Chet Kincaid_

      Better here than in a post. I just don't get the fascination with eye-rolling at the dumb ideas of random anonymous commenters, it's like the SNL sketch where everyone passes around the spoiled milk and has great fun exclaiming about how awful it tastes.

      • http://www.indiegogo.com/revive-vlad Doktor Zoom

        But Chet, some of that milk smells REALLY funny!

        Besides, its how Aliens get drunk.

  • nowave

    Wouldn't it be *slightly* less horrific and medievally stupid if certain Republican bastards had a pseudo-scientific theory that the act of rape rendered the *perpetrator impotent* rather than it being the magical property of the victim to "shut that whole thing down"? No. Either way, they're still scum.

    • sullivanst

      They have that pseudo-scientific theory too, it's just as garbage because the actual science that actually looks at how likely a woman is to become pregnant after a rape has found that it's just as likely as if the sex was consensual.

  • tessiee

    Wonder if Jenna Jameson still wants a Republican in office?

  • docterry6973

    Akin is the shiny object that got the MSM to look at the GOP's position. Ryan says exactly the same thing, as does the GOP platform, and suddenly it is a problem. I can't tell which makes me more ill: GOP meathead conservatives or the spineless MSM.

  • Negropolis

    Better late than never, though, no?

  • Negropolis

    Anyone see Claire's statement, yesterday, on this? She was admonishing Republicans for coming down so hard on a man that has apologized for his statement. lol

    Senator McCaskill is have entirely too much fun playing good cop/bad cop with this. lol And, I have to admit enjoying watching the GOP finally being forced to own its bullshit far too much. This isn't a new position of the party. The difference is that one of them finally got caught on tape during a high-level campaign saying it.

    Meet me in St. Louis, indeed.

    • http://inappropriatejobpostings.blogspot.com/ fuflans

      i was thinking more 'show me'.

      but maybe that's just me.

      (and yeah, claire's having a blast)

  • Misty Malarky

    Why hasn't Wonkette posted the nekkid Prince Harry pics?

    This is very disappointing.

    • http://inappropriatejobpostings.blogspot.com/ fuflans

      yes. we should be all over this.

  • Ruhe

    I appreciate the clarification. I think what went missing from all the discussion early on was that what he was really saying, his gross misunderstanding of anatomy aside, was that obviously some women lie about being raped. Now that's even more disturbing than his presumptions about lady-part functions isn't it? And that attitude that "them women just lie all the time about sex" that is revealed in Akin's statement is what his supporters will actually rally behind.

  • ttommyunger

    Rough weather for the GOP: shit-storms in Missouri this week, Hurricane coming to Tampa next week and the bottom predicted to fall out in November. Don't forget your rubbers, kids!

  • thurufally

    American Taliban, indeed.

  • TribecaMike

    Alas, Youtube has just taken down the video of Todd Akin raping Todd Palin.

  • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com MittBorg

    Dude, you need Dramatic Gopher for this scene. Also teh swelling violins.

    And don't tell anyone. I embarrass easy.

  • NatKingKong

    I think we all know who this "doctor" is who Akin gets his information on the ladyparts from: Theodoric of York.

    "Todd Akin: 'Throw rape victims in a river; If they drown, it was legitimate rape' http://www.thedailywedgie.blogspot.com