THAT'S NOT CHANGE WE CAN BELIEVE IN  10:35 am August 14, 2012

History’s Greatest Monster Barack Obama Politicizes Beer, Refuses To Buy One For Guy Holding A Romney Sign

by Rebecca Schoenkopf

Did you know? Barack Obama is a terrible alcoholicHey, Barack NoBAma, were you at the Iowa State Fair yesterday, cold buyin’ beers for the first 10 people to swear loyalty oaths to you for the privilege of quaffing sweet, cold Bud?

When asked if he was buying, Obama said, “Let me see what’s in my wallet.”

As the crowd cheered “Four more beers!” the president relented.

“I’ll tell you what, except for Romney sign, I’ll buy beers for ten people,” he said.

Barack Obama basically put that man in a FEMA camp. Why does he hate civility?

Anyway, we are 100 percent positive that those free beers if you aren’t holding a Romney sign are probably illegal, because CORRUPTION and VOTE-BUYING, and we expect the asshole Judicial Watch to file suit any second, retroactively removing him from office for his crimes against comity and the politicization of beer.

[WashingtonExaminer]

 

Hola wonkerados.

To improve site performance, we did a thing. It could be up to three minutes before your comment appears. DON'T KEEP RETRYING, OKAY?

Also, if you are a new commenter, your comment may never appear. This is probably because we hate you.

{ 120 comments }

ChillBill August 14, 2012 at 10:37 am

To be fair, the Romney supporter was really enjoying that Kool Aid.

Biff August 14, 2012 at 4:15 pm

Kool Aid, or Bud Light as depicted, same thing.

freakishlywrong August 14, 2012 at 10:37 am

I wouldn't piss my beer on an asshole holding a Romney sign.

iburl August 14, 2012 at 10:42 am

please reconsider.

finallyhappy August 14, 2012 at 10:43 am

I would- if I drank beer and could piss like a guy

Jus_Wonderin August 14, 2012 at 10:55 am

You could hire a proxy. I'd do it for you for a six pack.

Angry_Marmot August 14, 2012 at 10:50 am

He should only get a jellyfish sting and beg us to piss on him.

Nostrildamus August 14, 2012 at 3:12 pm

To be fair, it was Bud, so the distinction is pretty academic.

sbj1964 August 14, 2012 at 10:37 am

Screw you pal,go have a beer with Mr.Mormon.Just keep'in it real brother!

ChillBill August 14, 2012 at 10:43 am

He's definitely NOT "the guy you'd have a beer with."

starfanglednut August 14, 2012 at 10:54 am

He's not buying shit for anyone else, either. he's a cheap bastard.

Callyson August 14, 2012 at 1:16 pm

Though he's the guy who'd make you want to drink a beer or ten…

horsedreamer_1 August 15, 2012 at 7:33 am

Bush was supposedly a recovering alcoholic, but people still said he was the one they'd have a beer with.

Wadisay August 14, 2012 at 10:39 am

Call it a technicality, but Bud Lite isn't really beer.

kittensdontlie August 14, 2012 at 11:09 am

Also, since when did the President stop drinking 40 ouncers…?

HistoriCat August 14, 2012 at 11:18 am

I guess they weren't selling malt liquor there.

1stNewtontheMoon August 14, 2012 at 12:21 pm

Agreed but it's infinitely more beer-like than Mitt's ice cold milk.

Jus_Wonderin August 14, 2012 at 10:39 am

Don't Romney supporters drink champagne, anyway?

iburl August 14, 2012 at 10:42 am

Cristal

ChernobylSoup August 14, 2012 at 10:44 am

coffee, tea, coke, fluoridated water

ThundercatHo August 14, 2012 at 10:55 am

Coke is ok, in fact some Mormans drink it like fiends, since the LDS church invested in Coca-Cola.

eggsacklywright August 14, 2012 at 10:59 am

Wait, there's a church of LSD? This sounds interesting.

An_Outhouse August 14, 2012 at 11:01 am

and they're all snortin' blow according to Thundercat

Geminisunmars August 14, 2012 at 11:14 am

And they have all kinds of weird hallucinations, like they are going to go and exist on some alien planet after they die, and Jesus visited their town, and they love their underwear.

Biff August 14, 2012 at 4:16 pm

But the church disguised it as a prophesy!

starfanglednut August 14, 2012 at 10:54 am

The tears of starving orphans.

1stNewtontheMoon August 14, 2012 at 12:23 pm
Gratuitous World August 14, 2012 at 10:39 am

but he did purchase a glass of whole milk for the Romney supporter.

ChernobylSoup August 14, 2012 at 10:40 am

If buying beer got you elected, I'd be king of the universe by now.

chicken_thief August 14, 2012 at 12:02 pm

My Liege!!!!

Maman August 14, 2012 at 10:40 am

Imagine not buying a beer for a guy who is shitty to you. The gall of Obama. He isn't being very Godly

mwittier August 14, 2012 at 10:41 am

At least he didn't try to cover his tab with a hand-written note from Ray Kroc.

Preferred Customer August 14, 2012 at 10:41 am

"If you want free beer you don't have to pay for, vote for the other guy. Wait, where are you all going?"

SoBeach August 14, 2012 at 10:41 am

the crowd cheered "Four more beers!"

My kind of crowd.

Sounds a lot more fun than listening to a Randian explain how screwing me out of medicaid and cutting taxes for billionaires is going to fix the country.

randcoolcatdaddy August 14, 2012 at 10:41 am

One candidate wants to buy me beer. The other isn't sure what humans use beer for.

The choice is obvious.

Jus_Wonderin August 14, 2012 at 10:44 am

If only it had lubricating properties…it might compute for Romney.

ThankYouJeebus August 14, 2012 at 12:26 pm

How else would Rafalca keep her mane so manageable and shiny?

mavenmaven August 14, 2012 at 10:42 am

Of course, he served them Kenyan Tusker beer http://beeradvocate.com/beer/profile/822/2563/

RedneckMuslin August 14, 2012 at 10:42 am

See, Nobama doesn't care about farmers. If he did, he would have bought them a gallon of Ethanol.

anniegetyerfun August 14, 2012 at 10:57 am

It tastes like burning!

1stNewtontheMoon August 14, 2012 at 12:27 pm

Principal Romney, I got carsick in your office.

mookwrthwilson August 14, 2012 at 10:42 am

Every time you link to an article by Charlie Spiering I laugh…that picture is hilarious…he looks like he's wearing a confirmation suit his mother bought him…hahah…oh lord…

James Michael Curley August 14, 2012 at 10:57 am

That's a picture taken of the Keanu Reeves exhibit at Madame Tussauds.

freakishlywrong August 14, 2012 at 10:42 am

I fucking LIKE my President to have a beer. I simply don't trust people who don't drink.

anniegetyerfun August 14, 2012 at 11:03 am

I seriously don't understand how Obama doesn't spend every night completely drunk. Maybe he's saving it for the rest of his life, but if I were him, I'd spend an awful lot of time being blitzed.

lumpenprole August 14, 2012 at 11:21 am

He can't because he'd probably give in to temptation and post pics to the twitterz of that Churchill bust wearing funny hats (sombrero).

1stNewtontheMoon August 14, 2012 at 12:28 pm

or pictures of when he rubs his balls in the jellybean dish he keeps out as a tribute to reagan.

doloras August 14, 2012 at 6:00 pm

ISLAMOPHOBE!!!

Chichikovovich August 14, 2012 at 10:43 am

I thought that people who disagreed with politicians at the Iowa State Fair were supposed to be hauled off by state troopers.

elviouslyqueer August 14, 2012 at 10:43 am

There are so many choice comments from the Examiner comment board. Pity that the majority of them are from basement-dwelling poopsacks who probably haven't voted in an election at all, ever.

nowave August 14, 2012 at 10:44 am

When did Bud Light become 'beer'?

pinkocommi August 14, 2012 at 10:44 am

Romney countered by giving the entire US middle class the finger.

Schmannnity August 14, 2012 at 10:45 am

I want to see him smoke a bowl with the first 10 interceptors.

Come here a minute August 14, 2012 at 10:47 am

Mitt Romney is not a beer drinker, but some of his best friends own multinational beverage conglomerates.

mnotrtoo August 14, 2012 at 11:16 am

Question: Would Romney lose his own planet in the afterlife if he bought beers for supporters?

1stNewtontheMoon August 14, 2012 at 12:29 pm

I thought Romney and McCain didn't care for one another.

BerkeleyBear August 14, 2012 at 12:54 pm

McCain's just a tiny nit in the grand Unilever beverage conglomerate. Mitt's friends are at the very top in Switzerland (with his money).

FakaktaSouth August 14, 2012 at 10:47 am

If I were PresO I would have busted out the presidential switchblade and shot-gunned the fuck out of all the beers in Iowa, or maybe there should be an official Funnel of the POTUS? BeerPong with a Presidential Seal? Since these are the issues that matter, I think I would be a fun Pres.

Angry_Marmot August 14, 2012 at 10:56 am

The only problem would be getting you into a cab and making sure you didn't go home with the Koch brothers.

MosesInvests August 14, 2012 at 10:58 am

Ya got my vote.

HistoriCat August 14, 2012 at 11:22 am

VP Biden is on the phone … the White House is interested in your ideas and wants to know if you would consider becoming "Beer Czar".

nowave August 14, 2012 at 10:48 am

There's such a fine line between socializing and socialism. Ayn Rand would *never* buy anyone a beer, right Paul?

SorosBot August 14, 2012 at 10:48 am

You need a hell of a lot of beer to deal with being at the Iowa State Fair.

SoBeach August 14, 2012 at 10:53 am

Gotta wash down that fried butter on a stick with something.

MissTaken August 14, 2012 at 11:17 am

Butterstick LIBEL!!

ManchuCandidate August 14, 2012 at 10:48 am

I dare the Rmoney supporter to drink a beer with Rmoney.

eggsacklywright August 14, 2012 at 10:51 am

O should have given the Rmoney guy .82% of a beer.

Dudleydidwrong August 14, 2012 at 10:54 am

"When you've said O-BAMA, you've said it all."

And when you've got Rmoney, you've got shit.

HistoriCat August 14, 2012 at 11:57 am

I haven't heard that slogan since the 70s.

Mittens Howell, III August 14, 2012 at 10:54 am

Beer Stamp President!

eggsacklywright August 14, 2012 at 11:24 am

My name is Homer Simpson, and I approve this message.

FakaktaSouth August 14, 2012 at 10:59 am

PresO and my boyfriend Joe should challenge R-squared to a game of quarters for the election. Or maybe President – Asshole? I mean, damn it's RIGHT THERE in the name, it's like it was meant to be. UpRiver – DownRiver maybe is too on the nose, but good lord I now remember what I really learned in college.

Chet Kincaid_ August 14, 2012 at 11:27 am

Obama/Biden and Romney/Ryan should mix up some Jack Daniels and Coke, have a drunken sock-fight, pogo to the Specials, and then stagger down the street at 3 in the morning singing "Emotional Rescue". The next day, the RA can give the whole floor a stern lecture about the pot he knows they're trafficing. This is how I became the upstanding citizen I am today.

ThundercatHo August 14, 2012 at 11:00 am

I bet the green coffee bean stand will be popular at the Iowa State Fair. At least it should be.

mavenmaven August 14, 2012 at 11:01 am

"Beer? I know beer distillery owners"

James Michael Curley August 14, 2012 at 11:01 am

Almost four years, another shot of the guy drinking a beer and no beer gut. This guy wasn't born in America. By now it should be hanging six inches below his belt.

widestanceromance August 14, 2012 at 11:21 am

Say, you know what does hang six inches below his belt?

bikerlaureate August 14, 2012 at 4:37 pm

Hmmmm. "An onion" definitely isn't the right answer…

sudsmckenzie August 14, 2012 at 11:02 am

why does he taunt Tagg?

Angry_Marmot August 14, 2012 at 11:04 am

There's something sweetly old-fashioned about the president buying a beer, like they should be wearing boaters and bowler hats. Somewhere, Al Smith smiles.
Through the looking-glass, this is seen as Chicago style politics at its worst! Schaller's Pump! The Machine!

T3rbo August 14, 2012 at 11:04 am

Yeah, but who would YOU want to have a glass on water on Kolob with?

Wilcoxyz August 14, 2012 at 11:06 am

Yeah, but Ryan will split a $350 cabernet with you. If you're a think tank economist.

JustPixelz August 14, 2012 at 11:07 am

In fairness, the Romney guy was already high on something. Maybe beer, maybe Paul Ryan's budget, maybe meth. Hard to tell with that crowd.

OT but Romney spokesbot Tara Hall answered a question about Medicare with "“there are no differences relative to how we address this going forward with these two great men at the top of the ticket.” Typical Romney: He's indecisive about who's head of his own ticket.

bikerlaureate August 14, 2012 at 4:38 pm

Perhaps she was thinking about the Kochs.

Or Norquist and Oxybaugh.

smitallica August 14, 2012 at 11:10 am

I do think it's ironic that 97% of the people who will vote for the dry-because-the-Prophet-commands-it Mormon were the same people who voted for the dry-because-I-was-a-total-drunken-fuck-up W because they felt they could have a beer with him.
These people are wrong on like three different levels and don't even get it.

1stNewtontheMoon August 14, 2012 at 12:33 pm

Mitt would be 1000% more likely to sell these idiots into white slavery than have a beer with them.

fawkedifiknow August 14, 2012 at 11:10 am

Romney maybe doesn't drink beer, but he is best friends with people who own breweries. So, there's that.

whiskeybaby August 14, 2012 at 11:10 am

I have to admit, "Four more beers!" is actually pretty funny. Kudos, you beer-loving Obamabot Iowans.

mwittier August 14, 2012 at 11:15 am

The whole exchange was funny and kind of sweet. Made me wish I was there. In Iowa. Briefly.

Chet Kincaid_ August 14, 2012 at 11:12 am

This is worse than wrestling Grandpa to the ground and bum-rushing loud-mouthed lady hecklers combined!!1!!1!

Chet Kincaid_ August 14, 2012 at 11:15 am

Drudge Sirens: "Obama Tells Romney Supporter To Suck His Dick"

widestanceromance August 14, 2012 at 11:16 am

Who says Obama does not believe in exceptionalism?

MissTaken August 14, 2012 at 11:19 am

Romney will only drink a beer if it's less that .82% alcohol.

JohnyEdge August 14, 2012 at 12:17 pm

So it was a Bud Lite, what's the problem?

Chichikovovich August 14, 2012 at 11:22 am

Once again Obama is being a cruel practitioner of Chicago-style politics. A decent human being would have avoided the whole subject, out of respect for the fact that Paul Ryan's late father would occasionally enjoy a beer.

ElPinche August 14, 2012 at 11:23 am

OBAMALAMADINGDONG SHOULD BE IMPEACHED AND TRIED FOR TREASON FOR THIS TRAVESTY!!! Obozobomba basically just pissed all over OUR FREEDOM , America and Jesus ..also God !!11!! OOOOUUUUTTTTTRAAAAAAAGGE!!!!

SorosBot August 14, 2012 at 11:26 am

Cindy McCain does not approve.

MrDorkbutt August 14, 2012 at 11:27 am

The comments on the Examiner site were crazy. "Oh, he missed a chance to be a uniter." "Oh, he is using our tax money to buy that." Thankfully Examiner readers are just the homeless filth the GOP isn't going to allow to vote anyways.

ElPinche August 14, 2012 at 11:55 am

"dave" is precious. He's probably the next shooter.

bikerlaureate August 14, 2012 at 4:39 pm

Scandalous, that this furriner expects to be paid for destroying the country.
Unlike W.

belmontreport August 14, 2012 at 11:34 am

Look at that Obama, doing exactly what we predicted. Giving gov't beer handouts to Democrats and leaving all the Republicans to buy their own beer.

johnnyzhivago August 14, 2012 at 11:40 am

Romney would gladly buy you a Fresca as long as he can get a receipt so he can take it off his taxes.

1stNewtontheMoon August 14, 2012 at 12:34 pm

you mean, he'd act like he needed the receipt and then just keep not paying taxes.

Guppy August 14, 2012 at 11:40 am

The only way the GOP could top that is if they nominated someone married to a trollopy beer heiress.

Dildeaux August 14, 2012 at 11:45 am

Can this president stoop any lower?

Kinda cool that Obama cock-punched mittbot twice here. Once, by simply drinking beer. The other by having only $10 in his wallet. See folks, just a normal guy deserving of your vote.

Tundra Grifter August 14, 2012 at 11:56 am

Here in Northern California at any public event you want to name – rodeo, county fair, ball game, street carnival, etc. – you couldn't buy two beers with ten bucks.

arihaya August 14, 2012 at 11:47 am

Mitt Romney will swipe back by buying these people a ton of Jello

Tundra Grifter August 14, 2012 at 11:57 am

Barack Obama is a real human being. "Let me see what's in my wallet." You know that's his own money.

If it had been (r)Money, and if he were willing to buy somebody a beer, his first question would have been "Does anyone have change for a $1,000?"

proudgrampa August 14, 2012 at 12:13 pm

In other news, Romney offered to buy everyone a Root Beer.

mrblifil August 14, 2012 at 12:16 pm

This is why we need to bring back Prohibition. Along with Slavery.

Eve8Apples August 14, 2012 at 1:26 pm

Romney supporters do not need their President to buy beer for them. They can buy it on their own without help from the government.

savethispatient August 14, 2012 at 1:45 pm

The President should have bought two beers for the Romney sign guy – how's he going to hold up his sign when his hands are full of beer?

bikerlaureate August 14, 2012 at 4:41 pm

I like it – but the wingnuts would've complained about that too.
Or if he'd bought the guy one beer.
Or ten.

barto August 14, 2012 at 2:39 pm

Actually he had R-Money-sign's best interests at heart – we're talking Budweiser here after all…

Nostrildamus August 14, 2012 at 3:11 pm

It wasn't beer, it was Bud. Poison rat dicks would have been kinder.

BZ1 August 14, 2012 at 5:00 pm

The Washington Examiner: Isn't that a sweet piece of muckracking

ttommyunger August 14, 2012 at 9:05 pm

Guy with the Rmoney sign was imbibing the bitter dregs of sweet, sweet racist hatred.

hippie13 August 15, 2012 at 1:15 pm

Not giving a person Budweiser could be seen as a favor.

eggsacklywright August 14, 2012 at 11:34 am

And don't forget the Golden Pilates.

RadioBowels August 14, 2012 at 12:11 pm

In quiet rooms.

Comments on this entry are closed.

Previous post:

Next post: