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History’s Greatest Monster Barack Obama Politicizes Beer, Refuses To Buy One For Guy Holding A Romney Sign

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Did you know? Barack Obama is a terrible alcoholicHey, Barack NoBAma, were you at the Iowa State Fair yesterday, cold buyin’ beers for the first 10 people to swear loyalty oaths to you for the privilege of quaffing sweet, cold Bud?

When asked if he was buying, Obama said, “Let me see what’s in my wallet.”

As the crowd cheered “Four more beers!” the president relented.

“I’ll tell you what, except for Romney sign, I’ll buy beers for ten people,” he said.

Barack Obama basically put that man in a FEMA camp. Why does he hate civility?

Anyway, we are 100 percent positive that those free beers if you aren’t holding a Romney sign are probably illegal, because CORRUPTION and VOTE-BUYING, and we expect the asshole Judicial Watch to file suit any second, retroactively removing him from office for his crimes against comity and the politicization of beer.

[WashingtonExaminer]

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Rebecca is the editor and publisher of Wonkette. She is the author of Commie Girl in the O.C., a collection of her OC Weekly columns, and the former editor of LA CityBeat. Go visit her Commie Girl Collective, and follow her on the Twitter!

View all articles by Rebecca Schoenkopf

Comments

Hey there, Wonkeputians! Shypixel here to remind you to remember our Commenting Rules For Radicals, Enjoy!

  • http://wonkette.com ChillBill

    To be fair, the Romney supporter was really enjoying that Kool Aid.

    • Biff

      Kool Aid, or Bud Light as depicted, same thing.

  • freakishlywrong

    I wouldn't piss my beer on an asshole holding a Romney sign.

    • http://twitter.com/iburl iburl

      please reconsider.

    • finallyhappy

      I would- if I drank beer and could piss like a guy

      • Jus_Wonderin

        You could hire a proxy. I'd do it for you for a six pack.

    • Angry_Marmot

      He should only get a jellyfish sting and beg us to piss on him.

    • Nostrildamus

      To be fair, it was Bud, so the distinction is pretty academic.

  • sbj1964

    Screw you pal,go have a beer with Mr.Mormon.Just keep'in it real brother!

    • http://wonkette.com ChillBill

      He's definitely NOT "the guy you'd have a beer with."

      • http://wonkette.com/ starfanglednut

        He's not buying shit for anyone else, either. he's a cheap bastard.

      • Callyson

        Though he's the guy who'd make you want to drink a beer or ten…

      • horsedreamer_1

        Bush was supposedly a recovering alcoholic, but people still said he was the one they'd have a beer with.

  • Wadisay

    Call it a technicality, but Bud Lite isn't really beer.

    • kittensdontlie

      Also, since when did the President stop drinking 40 ouncers…?

      • HistoriCat

        I guess they weren't selling malt liquor there.

    • 1stNewtontheMoon

      Agreed but it's infinitely more beer-like than Mitt's ice cold milk.

  • Jus_Wonderin

    Don't Romney supporters drink champagne, anyway?

    • http://twitter.com/iburl iburl

      Cristal

    • ChernobylSoup

      coffee, tea, coke, fluoridated water

      • ThundercatHo

        Coke is ok, in fact some Mormans drink it like fiends, since the LDS church invested in Coca-Cola.

        • eggsacklywright

          Wait, there's a church of LSD? This sounds interesting.

          • An_Outhouse

            and they're all snortin' blow according to Thundercat

          • Geminisunmars

            And they have all kinds of weird hallucinations, like they are going to go and exist on some alien planet after they die, and Jesus visited their town, and they love their underwear.

          • eggsacklywright

            And don't forget the Golden Pilates.

          • RadioBowels

            In quiet rooms.

        • Biff

          But the church disguised it as a prophesy!

    • http://wonkette.com/ starfanglednut

      The tears of starving orphans.

    • 1stNewtontheMoon
  • http://gratuity.wordpress.com/ Gratuitous World

    but he did purchase a glass of whole milk for the Romney supporter.

  • ChernobylSoup

    If buying beer got you elected, I'd be king of the universe by now.

    • chicken_thief

      My Liege!!!!

  • http://www.vinoverve.com Maman

    Imagine not buying a beer for a guy who is shitty to you. The gall of Obama. He isn't being very Godly

  • http://mwittier.tumblr.com/ mwittier

    At least he didn't try to cover his tab with a hand-written note from Ray Kroc.

  • Preferred Customer

    "If you want free beer you don't have to pay for, vote for the other guy. Wait, where are you all going?"

  • SoBeach

    the crowd cheered "Four more beers!"

    My kind of crowd.

    Sounds a lot more fun than listening to a Randian explain how screwing me out of medicaid and cutting taxes for billionaires is going to fix the country.

  • randcoolcatdaddy

    One candidate wants to buy me beer. The other isn't sure what humans use beer for.

    The choice is obvious.

    • Jus_Wonderin

      If only it had lubricating properties…it might compute for Romney.

    • ThankYouJeebus

      How else would Rafalca keep her mane so manageable and shiny?

  • mavenmaven

    Of course, he served them Kenyan Tusker beer http://beeradvocate.com/beer/profile/822/2563/

  • RedneckMuslin

    See, Nobama doesn't care about farmers. If he did, he would have bought them a gallon of Ethanol.

    • anniegetyerfun

      It tastes like burning!

      • 1stNewtontheMoon

        Principal Romney, I got carsick in your office.

  • mookwrthwilson

    Every time you link to an article by Charlie Spiering I laugh…that picture is hilarious…he looks like he's wearing a confirmation suit his mother bought him…hahah…oh lord…

    • James Michael Curley

      That's a picture taken of the Keanu Reeves exhibit at Madame Tussauds.

  • freakishlywrong

    I fucking LIKE my President to have a beer. I simply don't trust people who don't drink.

    • anniegetyerfun

      I seriously don't understand how Obama doesn't spend every night completely drunk. Maybe he's saving it for the rest of his life, but if I were him, I'd spend an awful lot of time being blitzed.

      • lumpenprole

        He can't because he'd probably give in to temptation and post pics to the twitterz of that Churchill bust wearing funny hats (sombrero).

        • 1stNewtontheMoon

          or pictures of when he rubs his balls in the jellybean dish he keeps out as a tribute to reagan.

    • doloras

      ISLAMOPHOBE!!!

  • Chichikovovich

    I thought that people who disagreed with politicians at the Iowa State Fair were supposed to be hauled off by state troopers.

  • elviouslyqueer

    There are so many choice comments from the Examiner comment board. Pity that the majority of them are from basement-dwelling poopsacks who probably haven't voted in an election at all, ever.

  • nowave

    When did Bud Light become 'beer'?

  • pinkocommi

    Romney countered by giving the entire US middle class the finger.

  • Schmannnity

    I want to see him smoke a bowl with the first 10 interceptors.

  • Come here a minute

    Mitt Romney is not a beer drinker, but some of his best friends own multinational beverage conglomerates.

    • mnotrtoo

      Question: Would Romney lose his own planet in the afterlife if he bought beers for supporters?

    • 1stNewtontheMoon

      I thought Romney and McCain didn't care for one another.

      • BerkeleyBear

        McCain's just a tiny nit in the grand Unilever beverage conglomerate. Mitt's friends are at the very top in Switzerland (with his money).

  • FakaktaSouth

    If I were PresO I would have busted out the presidential switchblade and shot-gunned the fuck out of all the beers in Iowa, or maybe there should be an official Funnel of the POTUS? BeerPong with a Presidential Seal? Since these are the issues that matter, I think I would be a fun Pres.

    • Angry_Marmot

      The only problem would be getting you into a cab and making sure you didn't go home with the Koch brothers.

    • MosesInvests

      Ya got my vote.

    • HistoriCat

      VP Biden is on the phone … the White House is interested in your ideas and wants to know if you would consider becoming "Beer Czar".

  • nowave

    There's such a fine line between socializing and socialism. Ayn Rand would *never* buy anyone a beer, right Paul?

  • SorosBot

    You need a hell of a lot of beer to deal with being at the Iowa State Fair.

    • SoBeach

      Gotta wash down that fried butter on a stick with something.

      • MissTaken

        Butterstick LIBEL!!

  • http://wonkette.com ManchuCandidate

    I dare the Rmoney supporter to drink a beer with Rmoney.

  • eggsacklywright

    O should have given the Rmoney guy .82% of a beer.

  • Dudleydidwrong

    "When you've said O-BAMA, you've said it all."

    And when you've got Rmoney, you've got shit.

    • HistoriCat

      I haven't heard that slogan since the 70s.

  • Mittens Howell, III

    Beer Stamp President!

    • eggsacklywright

      My name is Homer Simpson, and I approve this message.

  • FakaktaSouth

    PresO and my boyfriend Joe should challenge R-squared to a game of quarters for the election. Or maybe President – Asshole? I mean, damn it's RIGHT THERE in the name, it's like it was meant to be. UpRiver – DownRiver maybe is too on the nose, but good lord I now remember what I really learned in college.

    • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/2012/06/introducing-bad-note-millstones-of-jazz.html Chet Kincaid_

      Obama/Biden and Romney/Ryan should mix up some Jack Daniels and Coke, have a drunken sock-fight, pogo to the Specials, and then stagger down the street at 3 in the morning singing "Emotional Rescue". The next day, the RA can give the whole floor a stern lecture about the pot he knows they're trafficing. This is how I became the upstanding citizen I am today.

  • ThundercatHo

    I bet the green coffee bean stand will be popular at the Iowa State Fair. At least it should be.

  • mavenmaven

    "Beer? I know beer distillery owners"

  • James Michael Curley

    Almost four years, another shot of the guy drinking a beer and no beer gut. This guy wasn't born in America. By now it should be hanging six inches below his belt.

    • widestanceromance

      Say, you know what does hang six inches below his belt?

      • bikerlaureate

        Hmmmm. "An onion" definitely isn't the right answer…

  • sudsmckenzie

    why does he taunt Tagg?

  • Angry_Marmot

    There's something sweetly old-fashioned about the president buying a beer, like they should be wearing boaters and bowler hats. Somewhere, Al Smith smiles.
    Through the looking-glass, this is seen as Chicago style politics at its worst! Schaller's Pump! The Machine!

  • T3rbo

    Yeah, but who would YOU want to have a glass on water on Kolob with?

  • Wilcoxyz

    Yeah, but Ryan will split a $350 cabernet with you. If you're a think tank economist.

  • JustPixelz

    In fairness, the Romney guy was already high on something. Maybe beer, maybe Paul Ryan's budget, maybe meth. Hard to tell with that crowd.

    OT but Romney spokesbot Tara Hall answered a question about Medicare with "“there are no differences relative to how we address this going forward with these two great men at the top of the ticket.” Typical Romney: He's indecisive about who's head of his own ticket.

    • bikerlaureate

      Perhaps she was thinking about the Kochs.

      Or Norquist and Oxybaugh.

  • smitallica

    I do think it's ironic that 97% of the people who will vote for the dry-because-the-Prophet-commands-it Mormon were the same people who voted for the dry-because-I-was-a-total-drunken-fuck-up W because they felt they could have a beer with him.
    These people are wrong on like three different levels and don't even get it.

    • 1stNewtontheMoon

      Mitt would be 1000% more likely to sell these idiots into white slavery than have a beer with them.

  • fawkedifiknow

    Romney maybe doesn't drink beer, but he is best friends with people who own breweries. So, there's that.

  • whiskeybaby

    I have to admit, "Four more beers!" is actually pretty funny. Kudos, you beer-loving Obamabot Iowans.

    • http://mwittier.tumblr.com/ mwittier

      The whole exchange was funny and kind of sweet. Made me wish I was there. In Iowa. Briefly.

  • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/2012/06/introducing-bad-note-millstones-of-jazz.html Chet Kincaid_

    This is worse than wrestling Grandpa to the ground and bum-rushing loud-mouthed lady hecklers combined!!1!!1!

  • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/2012/06/introducing-bad-note-millstones-of-jazz.html Chet Kincaid_

    Drudge Sirens: "Obama Tells Romney Supporter To Suck His Dick"

  • widestanceromance

    Who says Obama does not believe in exceptionalism?

  • MissTaken

    Romney will only drink a beer if it's less that .82% alcohol.

    • JohnyEdge

      So it was a Bud Lite, what's the problem?

  • Chichikovovich

    Once again Obama is being a cruel practitioner of Chicago-style politics. A decent human being would have avoided the whole subject, out of respect for the fact that Paul Ryan's late father would occasionally enjoy a beer.

  • ElPinche

    OBAMALAMADINGDONG SHOULD BE IMPEACHED AND TRIED FOR TREASON FOR THIS TRAVESTY!!! Obozobomba basically just pissed all over OUR FREEDOM , America and Jesus ..also God !!11!! OOOOUUUUTTTTTRAAAAAAAGGE!!!!

  • SorosBot

    Cindy McCain does not approve.

  • MrDorkbutt

    The comments on the Examiner site were crazy. "Oh, he missed a chance to be a uniter." "Oh, he is using our tax money to buy that." Thankfully Examiner readers are just the homeless filth the GOP isn't going to allow to vote anyways.

    • ElPinche

      "dave" is precious. He's probably the next shooter.

    • bikerlaureate

      Scandalous, that this furriner expects to be paid for destroying the country.
      Unlike W.

  • belmontreport

    Look at that Obama, doing exactly what we predicted. Giving gov't beer handouts to Democrats and leaving all the Republicans to buy their own beer.

  • http://johnnyzhivago.blogspot.com johnnyzhivago

    Romney would gladly buy you a Fresca as long as he can get a receipt so he can take it off his taxes.

    • 1stNewtontheMoon

      you mean, he'd act like he needed the receipt and then just keep not paying taxes.

  • Guppy

    The only way the GOP could top that is if they nominated someone married to a trollopy beer heiress.

  • Dildeaux

    Can this president stoop any lower?

    Kinda cool that Obama cock-punched mittbot twice here. Once, by simply drinking beer. The other by having only $10 in his wallet. See folks, just a normal guy deserving of your vote.

    • Tundra Grifter

      Here in Northern California at any public event you want to name – rodeo, county fair, ball game, street carnival, etc. – you couldn't buy two beers with ten bucks.

  • arihaya

    Mitt Romney will swipe back by buying these people a ton of Jello

  • Tundra Grifter

    Barack Obama is a real human being. "Let me see what's in my wallet." You know that's his own money.

    If it had been (r)Money, and if he were willing to buy somebody a beer, his first question would have been "Does anyone have change for a $1,000?"

  • proudgrampa

    In other news, Romney offered to buy everyone a Root Beer.

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/mrblifil mrblifil

    This is why we need to bring back Prohibition. Along with Slavery.

  • Eve8Apples

    Romney supporters do not need their President to buy beer for them. They can buy it on their own without help from the government.

  • savethispatient

    The President should have bought two beers for the Romney sign guy – how's he going to hold up his sign when his hands are full of beer?

    • bikerlaureate

      I like it – but the wingnuts would've complained about that too.
      Or if he'd bought the guy one beer.
      Or ten.

  • barto

    Actually he had R-Money-sign's best interests at heart – we're talking Budweiser here after all…

  • Nostrildamus

    It wasn't beer, it was Bud. Poison rat dicks would have been kinder.

  • http://howtosavetheworld.ca/ BZ1

    The Washington Examiner: Isn't that a sweet piece of muckracking

  • ttommyunger

    Guy with the Rmoney sign was imbibing the bitter dregs of sweet, sweet racist hatred.

  • hippie13

    Not giving a person Budweiser could be seen as a favor.