I'm fired? No you're fired! Get me a latte!Last night’s Newsroom was about many important things presumably, like good journalists being very angry about having to cover the snuff porn that was the Casey Anthony trial, and Rupert Murdoch’s British phone-tapping empire, and Olivia Munn being awesome. There was probably some other Issues in there as well, who can remember? But the only important question left is: with all the talented out-of-work journalists out there, why haven’t they yet fired Maggie?

First, last week (sorry we left you hanging, we didn’t feel like it), during the night when the ACN staff has been called in to work because Barack Obama killed Osama bin Laden, Maggie flips out and insists her boss (HER BOSS) interrupt his busy schedule of confirming that Barack Obama killed Osama bin Laden in order to role-play breaking up with Maggie’s roommate, because Maggie wants her boss to break up with her roommate. THIS SEEMS INAPPROPRIATE.

Now, it is revealed to us, during a squabble in the newsroom over who has to screen a starfucker calling in about Anthony Wiener’s junk tweets (oh right, it was about Anthony Wiener’s junk tweets too; recent history is fun!) that Maggie is actually the very lowest person on the ACN totem pole, like, under the two women who were hired as interns the same day. And yet when the executive producers walk into their news meeting while Maggie is on a tear about being personally offended by Michele Bachmann saying she hears God’s voice (oh yeah, it was about Michele Bachmann too), she tells them to hold their fucking water, because she is not done talking.

Women! Isn’t it cute how unprofessional and stupid they are? Oh, right! No.

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  • In other TV news, Breaking Bad sucked last night.

    • DaSandman

      Indeed and that's a shame. But the Newsroom sucks on an epic take no prisoners level.

    • No, it didn't.

      • Well, it was almost redeemed by the ending, but not quite.

        • The worst you could say is that it's turning into "The Shield", but that's not really a put-down. Let's gainsay each other all morning!

          • "Gainsay?" Dang, Chet, you're too erudite for modern Amurika. You need your own Boswell.

          • Why, every teenager who saw that classic Monty Python sketch knows "gainsay"!

    • eggsacklywright

      Last night we went from Breaking Bad to Breaking Evil. Some of it was hard to watch, but I still think it's a beautifully rendered show. The cinematography never fails to amaze me.

    • Amanwithnoplan

      Blasphemy. Walt crying crocodile tears in Hank's office? Crazy eyes girl chained to desk with pork-pie hat Walt? Murder of pre-teen. Geez. Whaddaya want?

  • Shhhhhh. No telling… I watched the Olympics last night instead. Oh and True Blood.

    • FNMA

      "I don't know nothing about birthing no vampire babies."
      — Tara

    • elviouslyqueer

      Oh lord. The closing ceremonies was the gayest thing I've seen since at least last Thursday.

      • proudgrampa

        Thank you for that, I thought I was the only one who felt that way.

        Not that I'm against gay things…

      • James Michael Curley

        I thought Eric Idle's imitation of a drunken pub crawler was spot on. But when he started singing "Always Look on the Bright Side of Life" it took a couple minutes to regain my composure so I could explain where the song came from.

    • BarackMyWorld

      And hopefully not the awful sitcom pilot NBC aired instead of showing the Who's closing act.

  • SorosBot

    I see Aaron Sorkin is all about being timely and relevant.

  • Baconzgood

    I don't get this channel. Is this like Sex in the City or Larry Sanders?

    • HistoriCat


  • BaldarTFlagass

    Oh boy! A television show!

  • fully

    I thought Newsroom was about how stupid young 'professionals' get to keep their jobs while the rest of us grey haired, literate, accomplished, experienced PROfessionals, can go suck it…at least the few episodes I saw…………………yeah that's recent news.

  • CrunchyKnee

    There's still television on the TeeVee?

    • GRIMM tonight!!!! Or as we call it, The Monroe Show.

      • viennawoods13

        Monroe rules.

      • we're kinda liking 'suits' – though i fear it's about to go down the rabbit-hole of overwrought soap type drama.

        and of course, 'revenge'.

    • BoatOfVelociraptors

      You mean non-streaming content feeds?

  • FNMA

    Alt-alt-text: Math is hard!

    • shelwood46

      No, that's the other "girl".

  • sbj1964

    Rupert Murdoch is like the Doctor Evil of Broadcasting.

  • LesBontemps

    Beloved Editrix:

    Why waste bandwidth bashing pretend journalists on some dumb teevee show when there are so many pretend journalists you could bash at our "real-life" Glorious News Media Institutions?

    Your humble & obedient servant, etc.,


    • Tundra Grifter

      Let's start with the evil Doctor Jerome Corsi, who is ranting on the You-Tubes that the problem with Cluster Fox is too many left-wing commentators.

    • Harrison Wintergreen

      Exhibit A: Cokie Roberts' sycophantic puff piece about Paul Ryan on NPR's Morning Edition today.

  • CthuNHu

    Next week, in a 2004/2008/2012 history mashup, Romney announces Maggie as his Vice Presidential pick on his personal battleyacht. Maggie arrives in a flight suit and stiletto heels, charms the crowd, and steals the mess hall silverware.

  • UW8316154

    I have no fucking idea what any of this is about.

    • Tundra Grifter

      In school chemistry class I sat between two young ladies who used to discuss fascinating sexy–time gossip. Then I learned it wasn't about other kids in high school – they were discussing a soap opera.

      • Guppy

        In school chemistry class I sat between two young ladies who used to discuss

        Oh God, it was too fucking early in the morning to put up with that…

      • James Michael Curley

        Once in real life, as opposed to during the work day in the law firm in which I was working, a bunch of us were down stairs having drinks. I overheard two young secretaries discussing 'Beetle juice' and wondering why they were 1. Talking about a star in Orion and 2. pronouncing it wrong (I thought the short e was preferred.)

    • ttommyunger


  • Biff

    Is this tv show supposed to be an analogy of something? Like the Animal Farm book? Because I'm just not seeing it. No, really, I don't get this channel…

  • Goonemeritus

    Ok I’m going to out myself as a fan of this show. And Maggie is a dead ringer for my niece so I take great umbrage at your uncharitable remarks towards her. Why do you want to fire my Niece you big meany?

    • Tundra Grifter

      I know a great "Dead Ringer" joke.

      • bobbert

        His face rings a bell.

  • metamarcisf

    She's right. Maggie is a pill.

  • BZ1

    Ahem, it's a tv show, not the ten commandments.

    • proudgrampa

      It's a TV show, not Citizen Kane.

  • Oblios_Cap

    Last night’s Newsroom was about many important things presumably

    Did they discuss, as I heard ad nauseum all weekend, that Paul Ryan was the "intellectual heavyweight of today's conservatives"?

    Isn't like that being the lightest kid at Fat Camp?

    • FNMA

      Tallest midget in the circus.
      — Mike Royko

    • BerkeleyBear

      Actually, I think it is being the fattest kid at fat camp, since the GOP pulls all of its "ideas" out of its ass.

  • sbj1964

    They should make a TV show about Fox&Friends. They can call it the all New 3 stooges show.

    • FNMA

      They already do. It's called The Onion News Network.

  • What the fuck, is that still on?! That's what happens when you have no commercials on your network, and people are forced to take your crap with the good stuff.

  • freakishlywrong

    Fuck the world. I'm still watching The Simpsons.

    • viennawoods13

      I'm still watching West Wing.

  • Angry_Marmot

    Does Sorkin want us to hate his female characters? Are we supposed to find them charming, or at least not horrible? I wanted Newsroom to succeed, but I'm having the same problem that made Studio 60 unwatchable, and I suspect Olivia Munn's character is growing on me because of good will already generated by Munn as a geek goddess. Hell, I'm still a West Wing fan, and I cringe every time one of Josh's "girlfriends" has a scene in the early episodes.

    • viennawoods13

      Amy's not bad, but that Season One woman was terrible. But aside from Josh's women, , who could be a more loveable woman than CJ or Donna?

    • BerkeleyBear

      In retrospect, the fact that Alyson Janie (CJ Craig) always praised Thomas Schlamme in the interviews and not Sorkin by name was a big tell.

      But I liked Mrs. Landingham, or however the heck you spell it. And even early on I found the idea the President was terrified of trying to reign in his wife, fobbing it off on staff, rang pretty true. But yeah, you never saw any male idiot groupies the way just about every dude on the show had.

    • BathroomGoblin

      Ha ha. I H*AT*E*D Olivia Munn before this, placing her next to Allison Pill makes her seem delightful.

  • Tundra Grifter

    Why is Wonketter running a photo of the abused drive-up window worker at Chick-fil-A?

  • The show wouldn't be half bad if it wasn't for that news crap.

  • gullywompr

    The most confusing thing about Maggie's place of work is that it's the strangest looking kitchen I've ever seen.

  • Is this the show about New York cops and prosecutors that always has a twist in the end? I didn't watch that one either.

  • Guppy

    Why is there a picture of a twelve year old girl on this Wonkett story and is Peodbear aware of this?

    • Oblios_Cap

      "How much for the leettle girl?"

  • BarackMyWorld

    She REALLY should have been fired when she fucked up the Jan Brewer interview, but Emily "the World's Great Journalist" Mortimer likes her, so she stays golden, Ponyboy.

  • I take it Maggie's the vapid-looking blonde with the translucent skin pictured above? Either Schlorkin's got a strange idea of what people in newsrooms look like or that's supposed to be a younger cuter Dana Perino. Or — as Perino and Palin both did but Schlorkin should know better — he's conflating the meaning of journalist with that of "communications major," which means one can stand on an x and read stuff.

  • Beowoof

    I had a tough choice to make, watch the Newsroom or fap. Again, I decided fapping would a better use of my time.

  • proudgrampa

    Really. Maggie's gotta go.

  • owhatever

    Olivia was great, slamming the dude against the wall while both were being angrily confused about what they were discussing. She's very good, and it was a well-written scene. Maggie is in charge of setting the nation's leftist media agenda.

  • DahBoner

    What channel on the Intertubes is that on?

    P.S. I'd tap it…

  • sewollef

    Who's the [attractive] under age chick in the pic? Is this story about something on the telly? 'Cos if it is, I'm gonna miss it, since I don't really watch much teevee.

    And, either she's underage or I'm getting older than I think. btw, get off my lawn…

  • ElPinche

    All of those news sluts should be at home, nekkid, bearfoot, and pregnint. *spit* .

  • ElPinche

    I have to say this show is a guilty pleasure. At least its not "Holy fuck! It's Honey Boo Boo " or whatever.

  • BathroomGoblin

    This is a story about Charlie and Leona. They had a child called Will who marries a fancy lady from Great Britain. Will and his wife adopt several white children and a few brown ones.
    They make a show called "The News" five whole days a week. This is their story. This is Aaron Sorkin's "The Newsroom."

  • ttommyunger

    Adult Swim, Comedy Channel, PBS or GTFO!

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