Mitt Romney Offers Truce In Which Criticism of Mitt Romney Would Be Banned

  should've gone with newt

I've got it all figured outHa ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha, ha ha ha, ha… ha… ah ha: “Romney also said in the interview he would like a pledge (of sorts) with Obama that there be no ‘personal’ attack ads. ‘[O]ur campaign would be — helped immensely if we had an agreement between both campaigns that we were only going to talk about issues and that attacks based upon — business or family or taxes or things of that nature.’” Okay… okay… let’s consider this… HAHAHAH, hahahahah, ha ha ha ha ha, sorry, we can’t do it, ha ha ha… what a world. Even the good little brown-noser people at Politico have written, “What is surprising is hearing a candidate say, essentially, ‘stop hitting me.’”

Mitt Romney just suggested that he would be fine — totally okay with! — a pledge that would prevent the Obama campaign from criticizing Romney’s business career, the centerpiece of his campaign for president. “Family” — no one’s doing this anyway. There was a DNC horse ad once that was up for about 12 hours, and somehow that counted, okay, okay. “Taxes” — just lay off, right? What is with this Obama and taxes. “Or things of that nature.” What nature? Criticisms of Mitt Romney? You know, no criticizing me in the political campaign, yadda yadda yadda, the usual.


Romney said of his own campaign: “[O]ur ads haven’t gone after the president personally. … [W]e haven’t dredged up the old stuff that people talked about last time around. We haven’t gone after the personal things.” That doesn’t mean surrogates or Super PACs have, as was brought up to him.

It’s so pathetic. He’s trying to run his primary campaign of bombing the opposition with SuperPAC ads exclusively, instead of getting one single speck of dirt on his hands. And even his “issues-based” criticisms of Obama are highly personal in a cowardly back-door way. “This President’s economic policies show that he knows nothing about, wasn’t really raised in, and absolutely hates America,” and so on.


We’re only one or two days away from a “I’m suspending my campaign to go back to Washington and get in everyone’s fucking way” freakout. Ha ha ha ha.


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Jim Newell is Wonkette's beloved Capitol Hill Typing Demon. He joined in 2007, left for some other dumb job in 2010, and proudly returned in 2012 as our "Senior Editor at Large." He lives in Washington and also writes for things such as The Guardian, the Manchester paper of liberals.

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