now that's a death panel

Mitt Romney Just Delighted To Wave Around His Blood-Soaked Death Squad Dollars

Blood Money

So, you know this picture? Wonkette editor Kris E. Benson likes to run it a lot. You’ve seen it 50 times maybe. Or 500, who knows? (Personally, our Romney-pic go-to is romneyapplauds.jpg.) So it turns out this picture is of Romney and pals celebrating their initial funding. And since Your Wonkette is like the Sesame Street of unspeakable atrocities, we learned something about this initial funding just yesterday! What was that something? Just the small matter that Bain Capital’s initial startup money came from the backers (and sometimes the fronters!) of El Salvador’s death squads.

Oh pooh, you say, nobody but stupid commies cares about Latin American death squads. (And nuns. Nuns care a lot. So like we said, nobody but stupid commies cares about Latin American death squads.)

Hi Bloomberg Businessweek, do you have an uncomfortable interview with His Lord High Hairgel Mittens Romney, about the “moment of humor” that this picture captured?

BLOOMBERG BUSINESSWEEK: When you look at it now, does that photo of you and your Bain colleagues posing with money in your pinstripe suits make you laugh or make you cringe?

ROMNEY: Oh, that was a moment of humor as we had just done what we thought was impossible. We had raised $37 million from other people and institutions who entrusted us with their funds, and we thought it was a miracle that our group had been able to be so successful in fundraising. And ultimately we were able to yield for them a very attractive return by such investments as Staples, which was in our very first fund.

BLOOMBERG BUSINESSWEEK: So it’s a happy memory.

ROMNEY: We had a great group of people, each one of whom I think of fondly.

Yes, Mitt Romney thinks of each member of El Salvador’s ARENA party fondly, from the ones who assassinated Archbishop Oscar Romero in his pulpit, to the ones who tortured thousands of Salvadoran citizens with a blowtorch.

Obviously, this is a losing battle. John Negroponte, our ambassador to Honduras at the time who covered up the torture and war crimes of Battalion 316 by digging mass graves on the grounds of a US military base there, was made ambassador to the UN and then Iraq under George W. Bush. Anyway, everyone knows the Contras were the equivalent of the US founding fathers! And Pinochet made Chile safe for Capitalism!

So the fact that Mitt Romney remembers fondly all his Latin American death squad friends should bump him up with the bloodthirsty base, at the very least, since at the moment they’re all terribly concerned that a Romney flack admitted that Socialist Kenyan Anticolonial Romneycare keeps people from dying in Massachusetts. Keeps people from dying?! Why, that just won’t do. Romney-Ghost of D’Aubuisson 2012!

[BusinessWeek]

About the author

Rebecca is the editor and publisher of Wonkette. She is the author of Commie Girl in the O.C., a collection of her OC Weekly columns, and the former editor of LA CityBeat. Go visit her Commie Girl Collective, and follow her on the Twitter!

View all articles by Rebecca Schoenkopf
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168 comments

    1. Urban_Achiever

      "Yeah, we bet that I couldn't make myself richer and put everyone else in America in the poorhouse at the same time"…..

    1. GeorgiaBurning

      It's certainly a growing industry, with good potential return on capital. The cost of tax and regulatory compliance is negligible. An added plus is a tradition of quick disposition of any labor issues.

  1. actor212

    Look at those morons, giving blow jobs to dollar bills.

    UR DOIN' IT RONG!

    You use the dollar bills to *purchase* blow jobs. That means giving the moneyz to someone else…in your case, probably underage…in exchange for a concerto on your skin flute.

  2. Estproph

    I don't know which is worse – Mitt Romney as president, or people who would willingly vote for him, knowing everything we now know, as fellow citizens.

    1. Lascauxcaveman

      That's just it, they don't know. They don't really pay attention. That's why they vote for teatard idiots who campaign on "jobs" and then spend all their time in congress chipping away at abortion and brown peoples' rights.

      To most voters Mitt is just another rich white guy with great hair, a nice looking family, and an oddball religion.

      In other words; mostly harmless.

  3. Goonemeritus

    "Le secret des grandes fortunes sans cause apparente est un crime
    oublié, parce qu' il a été proprement fait."

    1. Mumbletypeg

      Had I been on hand to witness the nuptials of Mitt with his partners-in-sleaze, I might've blessed their honeymoon carriage with one specially etched message: "JUST MERDE."

      1. Goonemeritus

        History seems to feel Mitt’s Mom and Dad were very compassionate ethical people. I don’t know where Mitt stepped off the good road but if he were to turnaround and look for it he would need the Hubble Telescope to find it.

        1. Fukui-sanYesOta

          I was also surprised at this when I read up on Rmoney Senior. Seems like a genuinely good guy for the most part.

          I posit it's because he really knew what it was like to be on the arse-end of poverty, in stark contrast to Willard.

      1. Goonemeritus

        My mother was born in a town close enough to the French border that their toilet flushed into France

  4. noodlesalad

    Mitt Romney wouldn't know a moment of humor if it walked up to him and handed him $37 million in unmarked, blood-soaked bills.

    1. Not_So_Much

      I'm pretty sure the main reason he isn't showing his taxes is so that they don't find out he stiffed them on their 10% vig charitable donation.

  5. NorthStarSpanx

    ROMNEY: We had a great group of people, each one of whom I think of fondly.

    But his buddy Bibi remembers him only as somebody that he used to know. Somebody.

    1. Self-Uploader

      Bibi is a Jabotinsky-inspired right-wing zionist with plans for a "Greater Israel" and Palestinian blood on his hands, but to paraphase from Dexter, even he has standards.

  6. freakishlywrong

    Oh, that was a moment of humor
    Frat boy, entitled, bullying humor is not funny to the rest of us. Mittens and his ilk wouldn't know humor it it bit them in the ass.

  7. thefrontpage

    My name is Enrique Montoya, of Montoya Public Relations. For several years, Montoya Public Relations handled all of the United States domestic public relations for The El Salvador Death Squad Association, a private, non-profit that represented the majority of the Death Squads operating in El Salvador. The Association, speaking on behalf of most of El Salvador's Death Squads, has stated publicly, repeatedly, that much of our money went directly to Bain Capital, for several years. In fact, we are proud to have been one of the major funding sources for Bain Capital. We provided millions and millions of dollars to Bain Capital. We love Bain Capital. We still give tons of money to Bain Capital! And we also support the current organization recently started by Karl Rove. The El Salvador Death Squad Association is a proud financial backer of Bain Capital and Karl Rove. The El Salvador Death Squad Association approved this message.

    1. Ducksworthy

      I'm sorry but under Citizens United the disclosure of funding of U.S. political campaigns by foreign death squad associations is no longer required.

      1. bikerlaureate

        While reading Enrique's words, I imagined him as more than happy to volunteer his endorsement.

  8. MissTaken

    I find the taste of blood to be a bit too metallic for my liking, but Mitt and Co don't seem to mind.

      1. MissTaken

        I'm glad I have a place where I can direct my grouchiness without fear of getting fired or arrested.

  9. Texan_Bulldog

    Barry needs to run a 30 second silent commercial with nothing but this photo. Because who doesn't have pics like this in their own scrapbooks?

  10. Oblios_Cap

    We had raised $37 million from other people and institutions who entrusted us with their funds, and we thought it was a miracle that our group had been able to be so successful in fundraising

    "Those stupid fuckers just gave us $37Million" . In all fairness, the people who gave him the cash weren't the kind of folks who would have taken it lightly if the funds had been "misinvested".

  11. Baconzgood

    "(Mitts) doesn't feel pain or remorse, and he won't stop ever until he has all your money"

    -Sara Conner's boyfriend-

  12. elviouslyqueer

    I don't think I've seen that many preening assholes since the last time the Ramrod celebrated Power Bottom Night.

    1. freakishlywrong

      You have been amusing me tremendously of late, (well, really always, but there's a bit more of a surly quality)

  13. SexySmurf

    I wish they would have asked him about the picture in the fudge shop with the glove and the creepy smirk, and if it was a happy memory or if it made him cringe.

    On second thought, maybe not.

      1. bikerlaureate

        Thoroughly underrated actor. "My Favorite Year", and even "Noises Off!" prove this to be true…

    1. Lascauxcaveman

      7-11 won't take blood soaked bills.

      Send them to Mitt, considering the people he's taken money from, he must have some expertise with money laundering.

  14. MacRaith

    But the guy who tortured all those people with the blow torch retroactively retired from the death squads, so it never happened.

  15. CapnFatback

    I call bullshit. El Salvador was a banana republic, and banana is waaaaaaay too exotic a flavor for Mitt.

  16. kittensdontlie

    DumbestAss Mittens pioneer work, Romneycare, co-opted a softer version of death squads for it's Euthanasia for the Elderly program, which heretofore has been falsely attributed to Nobamacare.

  17. GhostBuggy

    Death squad connections? No problem. I don't know if you knew this, but there's a black man in the White House.

  18. actor212

    Y'know, I'm just thinking: the people I know who invest with private equity firms and hedge funds, they're very serious (and pretty wealthy) folks who understand the risks involved in essentially placing a huge pile of long shot money on a bet. I've studied these folks, even beaten them at poker a few times.

    I can pretty much guarantee you that, if any of the Bain investors– including the El Salvadoran death squads– had seen this photo when it mattered to them, Mitt's company would have folded like a cheap card table in a windstorm.

    And I suspect Mitt's body would remain vanished to this day.

    1. MissTaken

      Seriously. I work for a company that does back office work for hedge funds. If there's one thing they and their investors like is keeping things nice and quiet. In all honesty, you don't want to go bragging about what you are doing because some other fool on the street will try to copy your strategy and move the market. There's a reason private funds don't advertise or have fancy websites, and the above picture is that reason.

      1. actor212

        I have to sign non-disclosure agreements just to review the target markets in some of the deals I've reviewed. I had to bite my lip really hard when Facebook went public, knowing what I knew.

        1. Typodong3

          What, that Facebook was vastly overpriced at the public offering, and would tank to half its value in a month or two, ripping off the average investor?

          1. comrad_darkness

            The average investor shouldn't have been so moronic to forget the dot com bubble. Already. Fools and money and all that.

      2. James Michael Curley

        For that reason and my experiences with my company, a very private holding company where they allow me to tell people its name and that's all; more and more I'm thinking that Mitt was just the show pony, the guy who was asked to join the club because he had a hot sister or money or a father who was a former CEO, Governor, Cabinet Member, Presidential Candidate.

  19. Biel_ze_Bubba

    It's not Mitt's fault that El Salvador didn't have Romneycare, to treat the bullet and blowtorch wounds of uninsured nuns.

  20. JustPixelz

    Romney was asked two questions in that excerpt:
    1) When you look at it now…laugh or cringe?
    2) happy memory?

    And he didn't answer either. Fuckwad.

  21. BaldarTFlagass

    "Obviously, this is a losing battle."

    But still I yearn for a happy ending to all this. What a deluded fool I am.

  22. SayItWithWookies

    C'mon it's not really the criminal kind of murder and nun-rape and assassination and stuff — it was just perpetrated against peasants, poor farmers, students, revolutionaries, marxists, priests, and agitators for human rights and democracy — you know, Soviet dupes.

    1. ChernobylSoup

      Throw in the fact that the nun-rapers stopped the dastardly domino effect in Central America just like they did in Southeast Asia, and we should be praising Romney for doing business with them.

  23. Typodong3

    I used to think Mitt's afterlife would be a reflection and culmination of his life on earth, where he spends eternity wallowing in poverty and want in some terrible hellish slum of his own heartless creation. Ive now come to realize Mitt's afterlife will be a reflection and culmination of his life on earth, where he spends eternity sitting in an empty classroom with nothing but a staff of pissed off, murdered nuns endlessly slamming his knuckles with rulers.

    1. Nothingisamiss

      When we find out they DID fund him it will be a non-story which, when brought up, will be all about LIBERAL ATTACKS.

  24. Mumbly_Joe

    So, you know this picture? Wonkette editor Kris E. Benson likes to run it a lot. You’ve seen it 50 times maybe. Or 500, who knows? (Personally, our Romney-pic go-to is romneyapplauds.jpg.)

    You are, of course, both wrong. The best Romney Picture of all time is romney-fudge-250×167.jpg

  25. prommie

    So you are telling us that Bain is the new Brown Brothers Harriman? The Bush family wealth machine that was Nazi-connected and went on to become an arm of the CIA and the military-industrial complex? That the CIA still does this stuff, use its covert operations to fund deeply secret and deeply illegal internal operations to subvert the political process in the US?

    1. FakaktaSouth

      My favorite will always and forever be the Carlyle Group. The George HW Bush as wimp bullshit was quite an impressive cover for what he really was able to finance.

      1. prommie

        Weren't Osama Bin Laden's and W Bush's fathers partners in that there Carlyle Group? Oh but if you think there us anything at all wrong with all that, your just some crazy conspiracy theorist.

        1. Chet Kincaid_

          It's almost as if you guys are saying that the private equity consulting group is a longstanding strategy and instrument of Ruling Class Families to influence government, with both overt profit and covert foreign policy motives. Why would you say such awful things and disturb my cartoon/Sunday School version of American rectitude?!

          1. HistoriCat

            How could you have missed the "private equity will control your life" episode of School House Rock?

          2. prommie

            Whats up with that fucking dude? Some kinda "If you can't beat 'em, join em" thing? Hey, ask me anything, anything at all, about Buster Soaries, sometime.

  26. Oblios_Cap

    does that photo of you and your Bain colleagues posing with money in your pinstripe suits make you laugh or make you cringe?

    Mr. Romney emitted that goddamned laugh of his, causing small children in the audience to burst into tears and hug their parents closer.

    Must credit Doktor Zoom

  27. SoBeach

    Almost nobody gave a crap what our "friends" were doing to people in Central America in the 80s. I'm sure they care even less now. Sorry for the snarklessness, but that's just the way it is.

    1. Crank_Tango

      There may be some latino US voters who feel otherwise, I dunno, hopefully for mitt the suppression efforts will take care of all brown voters by November anyway.

      1. schvitzatura

        RNC Hispanic Outreach Director Bettina Inclán would be the resource to field all concerns about these meso-american brown issues.

        But they can't keep the brownish-red- yellow folk straight, even in their own media, Messicans and Messican-like people resemble their forebears who came across the Bering Strait land bridge many moons ago…
        http://2012.talkingpointsmemo.com/2012/06/rnc-lat

        They're all Lamanites though, right, Mitt?

  28. Ducksworthy

    Just finished reading Abe Lincoln, Vampire Hunter and its is clear that the Romney bid for world domination is backed by vampires. Another eruption of vampire political ambition, like the Confederacy and Nazism.

  29. fredbell

    Whoa, whoa, whoa…back up.!!…

    "He said they were the 'moral equivalent' of the founding fathers..there's a difference."
    ~ an actual quote from Bill "Didn't Bet the Lunch Money" Bennett back in the day…

    1. Typodong3

      And they seem so absolutely SHOCKED, silly/giddy shocked, that anyone would give them 37 million dollars! Yeah. Its like the owners of a lemon grove allowing their kids to come to the corporate offices to set up a lemonade stand. The fix was in from the start, they aren't fooling anyone.

  30. comrad_darkness

    But Jesus loves money and loves those who love money even more. So the X-tians tell me. That's not what the bible tells me, but all the X-tians do, and that's what counts.

  31. sewollef

    "…. digging mass graves on the grounds of a US military base…."

    [Snark free]. What. The. Fuck.

    Seriously, what the fuck? This makes be simultaneously, angry and wanting to puke. I feel like I need to go wash my eyes out after reading this.

    What a grotesque, appalling story. I suppose these murdered people are all buried around the Stars and Stripes flag that flew on the base too. Fucking nice.

      1. sewollef

        I finished reading the Reagan book, 'Tear Down This Myth' only last month.

        Man-oh-man, was that man an unscrupulous, unfeeling motherfucker that should have done serious jail time for Iran-Contra.

        1. Fukui-sanYesOta

          I've always been partial to the (possibly apocryphal) Margaret Thatcher quote: "How did a man that stupid become President?"

  32. Wadisay

    I always wonder whether, if these guys turned around, they would have money coming out of their asses, too.

  33. MistaEko

    Well, those El Salvadorians may be dead now, but they would be doing just fine if they had lived in Massachusetts.

  34. pdiddycornchips

    Death Squad money won't cause a blink in our electorate. ARENA will be too complicated to explain, it's not like he took money from people everyone knows are evil. Say Bill Ayers or George Soros. Then he would have a problem.

  35. An_Outhouse

    I've decided to start my own business! Does anyone know a good death squad I could borrow a few bucks from?

  36. ttommyunger

    If Negroponte had Mitten's looks, he would have been pushed for President on the GOP Ticket. He is what Mitt looks like inside.

        1. James Michael Curley

          There's a picture of Negroponte standing in front of Guernica, he fits right in.

  37. Steverino247

    Most of the problems facing the United States today are the result of the policy started about 1950 of doing literally anything to stop Communism.

    Iran–We whacked a popular leader and stuck them with the Shah.
    Iraq–We boosted Saddam Hussein when Iran blew up in our faces.
    Afghanistan–We backed insane religious fundamentalists and gave them Special Forces training (I've met some of their trainers).
    Central America–Well, you know.

    As I've said previously, it's easier to love your country when you don't know what it's been doing in your name.

  38. Angry_Marmot

    I was in college then, with Maryknoll professors and Fr. Roy Bourgeois as a guest speaker. And I'm still pissed off because these crimes were done in my name without consulting me.

    But yeah, good luck getting the average voter to give a shit about some old rape, murder and drug dealing, because, hey those were Communist nuns and welfare crackheads, and this is an American success story!

  39. Steverino247

    Wasn't this the inspiration for Casino Royale? A private investment group that launders money for shady people. Had Bain failed to make a good return for them, wouldn't he have been buried on the same military base? I think this explains his forced smile, by the way. He's hiding a lot of shit in that head of his and taking a very serious risk by running for President. The folks who made all that money doing sneaky shit certainly don't want Mitt's story to come out. Good way to raise funds, though. "Hey, remember how I made you millions of dollars and washed all the blood off your money…"

  40. Pithaughn

    My best friend (RIP) and I raised $2500 once to start a pizza shop. We did not have time to put on our Brooks Bros suits and hire a photographer to take a picture from the mezzanine of our kitchen. I did have a Brooks Bros suit at the time. Required costume for one of my 3 part time jobs, limo driver. As another poster suggested, run ads with this ostentatious display of wealth so that by Nov every voter has at least seen it, then if they still vote for Mr Rmoney so be it, they deserve what they get. The voter deserves what they get, not Rmoney he deserves nothing, just to be clear. I suspect Rmoney feels he deserves the presidency since he has spent so much to get it, that's the way those people think.

  41. TribecaMike

    This story has slammed smack into my snark threshold, so I'll just say fuck you Romney and the mass murderers you rode in on.

  42. friendlyskies

    Just because ARENA has morphed into moderate Republicans committed milquetoast conservatism like keeping El Salvador's road system flawless and best beaches blocked by pricey gated communities, I had to look up the year Bain was founded. 1984. Which puts it in the very worst era of the nightmarish Salvadoran "Civil" War. The Atlacatl Battalion (trained in Georgia!) and Domingo Monterrosa (a Nazi fuck) were in full swing, read this if you're not familiar with the carnage: http://www.markdanner.com/articles/show/the_truth

    But hey, that money got Staples going! I'm sure they're so proud…..

  43. MoeDeLawn

    If you want to build the Garage Mahal, you need to lose the fecks and cast aside all your ruths.

  44. ambrose612

    I appreciate all the comments on this, but could Ms. Schoendopf or someone please spell out exactly the connection between Bain's first investments and the death squads, Da'Auboisson or whoever? Where can I find this information verified.

    I have only just discovered (via WhoWhatWhere) your wonderful site. Thanks!

Comments are closed.