Does rubber-lipped diamond-humper Newt Gingrich think it is awesome for Mitt Romney to flat-out lie in his advertisement about Obama (not) dropping the welfare-to-work requirements in waivers to the states? Sure it is awesome. It’s a political ad, you can’t expect people to tell the truth when they only have 30 seconds! Did Newt Gingrich feel the same way about whether truth should be optional when it was he who was on the receiving end of Mitt Romney’s fun money? We will give you a guess. Think hard! Think long! Are you ready to learn if you were right? No, not yet? We will wait.
Gingrich has vowed to stay “positive” in his quest for the GOP nomination, but has been increasingly on the attack against Romney as his poll numbers have declined, mainly in response to the barrage of negative ads purchased by groups supporting Romney, Rep. Ron Paul of Texas and other of his rivals. A super PAC calling itself Restore Our Future and run by former Romney aides has spent nearly $3 million on ads in Iowa. [...]
At a campaign stop in Marshalltown, Iowa, Gingrich acknowledged that the negative ad blizzard hurt his campaign and “drove me from the 30s to the teens” in the polls. He said of Romney, “Somebody who will lie to you to be president will lie to you as president.”
So … yeah, sounds like he’s totally fine with it! You weren’t expecting that one, were you? You are the worst political prognosticator ever. You should go work for Dick Morris.
{ 177 comments }
Lies come in, lies go out. You can't explain it!
Sure I can: GOP.
"If you tell a lie often enough, it becomes the truth"
Motto of the Republican Party
Fucking Republicans; how do they work?
Gingrich is still regretting the first time he said "It's OK, baby, I had a vasectomy"
Isn't that because she had chlamydia?
Newt's daughter is named Chlamydia?
Chlamydia, the tattooed lady….
Chlamydia, Chlamydia, the walking encyclopedia (of infectious diseases)?
I'm guessing you're down with Marxist references, A212.
Actually, the correct quote was: "it's OK, baby, my wife is in the hospital dying"
Anderson, it's not ok to lie to your wife.
Ha ha, just kidding. Anderson, do you see what I did there?
Man, that's harsh. Nobody should have to work for Dick Morris. Well, ok, Erik Erickson.
I would also assign the ghost of Andrew Breitbart to Dick duty.
Ladies and Gentlemen, your next Secretary of Something! (if $money wins of course).
Ministry of Truth.
Blood Diamond Newtie at Treasury and Bobby Jindal at Edjumuhkation bringing in exorcisms and dinosaur-riding Jebus to the science classroom.
The only truth Romney knows is the feeling he has after having a big bowl of his favorite cereal, Loopholes. It's chock full of fiber, because we all know that Romney is not a regular guy.
Once again we see why you have so much p.
Good morning and thanks!
What the heck happened? You've gained like 3 or 4 points in the last couple of days after that weird sudden loss.
Its called 'bounce back' diuretics cause a similar effect.
The only truth Romney knows is that everyone has been telling him his whole like that he's going to become President and fulfill Joseph Smith's White Horse Prophesy. Unfortunately, he's run into a few people who aren't sticking to the game plan.
I'm afraid to Google white horse prophesy,is that a real thing? Please say no.
Yep, unfortunately. They think that a time will come when the US Constitution is hanGing by a thread and a Mormon will be elected President, save the US, institute a Mormon based theocracy, and everything will be just peachy.
You know what else has fiber? Currency. And that is why rMoney needs so much of it.
It's not working very well; he's still full of shit.
"It;s not a lie if you believe it". George Castanza
"it's not a lie if the idiot base believes it and no one in major media markets calls you on it." Mitt Romney
Or if you just repeat it enough….
Hands over ears, "La-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la, I can't hear you".
Or if you're really, really, rich.
The ubermensch is not bound by the ordinary rules of morality, thats for the masses, the lower orders.
Keith Ubermensch?
I still miss that guy.
Leona Helmsley for VP.
Kind of a niche comment.
Mitt Romney doesn't lie. It's just a problem with the coding of his truthalgorithm.exe file which sorts through thousands of possible realities and then suggests several potential positions which may or may not be ludicrously racist/classist/non-human, and also untrue. His programmers have assured the country that this bug will be patched in the latest update to the 1%OS
I initially read that as "the latest upgrade to the 1%POS" which is possibly what you meant.
There's no reason they can't both be true!
I think we can all agree Romney's operating system is a piece of shit.
I just can't follow what you're saying here with Baby Charles Xavier telepathically ramming "Become a Social Worker!!" into my skull.
I guess those ads are blocked here by the Air Force firewall. Aim High!
Something, something…ad astrum?
I read that as "Become a Socialist Worker", and figured it for a triumph of targeted advertising.
Ah, if only Socialist Worker could afford that kind of advertising.
It's not lying if it helps you, right?
Yes, as evidenced by this transcript:
GIRL:
Will you love me forever?
BOY:
I couldn't take it any longer
Lord I was crazed
And when the feeling came upon me
Like a tidal wave
I started swearing to my god and on my mother's grave
That I would love you to the end of time
I swore that I would love you to the end of time!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CzvLhkzGraA
This never fails to crack me up, especially the chubby kid dancing and doing the White Boy Lip Bite.
Rubber-lipped diamond-humper = computer screen coffee spew.
Oh well it needed some Cheetos crumb removal anyway.
Helpful Hints from Heloise!
it's on the list https://docs.google.com/spreadsheet/pub?key=0AlOc…
"30 seconds is not enough time to smell the bullshit."
–Newt Gingrich
Lies are people, too, my friends.
And sadly, those lies are the only friends Mittens has….
I always defer to the former Speaker when it comes to issues of ethics. Without his guidance there is no telling how many blow jobs I would have passed on.
or fresh wife material?
Why buy the cow…..?
I get your point, and agree, however much trouble I have thinking of Callista as 'fresh.'
Crispy, more like it.
"trouble I have thinking of Callista as 'fresh.'"
Only by comparison to Newticles.
Flash-frozen? Cryogenically preserved?
Mason jar with bad seal?
Frozen smile, frozen expression; and I think if you bent a corner off her hairdo, it would break off with a little "tink!" sound.
I wonder if Three Dog Night would let Obama's crew use their song "Liar" in their ads about Romney. At least the chorus.
Rick Santorum locked Three Dog Night in as his campaign slogan.
"Restore Our Future?" Time travel notwithstanding, I'm not sure they thought that one through.
It's doubly stupid, because it's the past they are trying to restore.
And they want us to believe they are smart enough to run a whole country, when it seems that they can't even run an effective campaign.
A man what can't keep his lies straight is in no shape to manage lies on an international scale.
With Mitt's ability to retroactively correct/improve his history, it is a form of time travel.
"they can't even run an effective campaign."
Nor even a three-word-long slogan.
I've lived through much of this "past" they want to restore, and it totally sucked ass.
They'll probably
Restore
Our
Future
Later
by baptizing it posthumously?
Especially since that sort of alludes to French philosopher and poet Paul Valery, who famously said "The future isn't what it used to be." Pretty continentally cynically ironic for a real American, n'est-ce pas?
Mitt probably picked that up in Paris while he was
dodging the war he picketed in favor ofsaving souls.I see Newt and often have a vision from my childhood. Climbing up to the top of the stove and looking inside the can into which my mother would pour the bacon grease every morning.
My Mom used to do that, too. Mint condition 1950s-60s bacon grease, in a period can, is highly sought after on the collectibles circuit.
Seems surprising that no one has made a hipster beer from bacon grease. If they have, I'd rather not know.
The Double Down in Las Vegas sells a bacon martini. Are martinis hipster, or are they passé?
There's a hipster food cart in SE Portland that sells chocolate covered bacon. IMO, that ruins *two* good things, but apparently, it sells.
Ours had added cat fur for texture.
Aughh!!
I pretty much always have added cat fur, due to this character http://www.flickr.com/photos/13152388@N00/6388854…
*high-pitched, babyish, talking-to-animals voice*
Oh, LOOK at the kitty!
He's a big flufferbaby!
No joke, cleaning out my father’s apartment after he died we found a can of spam. No expiration date, but looking at their web site (back in 1999) the label design was late 1950’s. Since he was living in an independent living senior center, I speculate someone who had been living there since it was built in the ‘50s had died and he got it somehow. He didn’t have it when he moved in because I carried almost every item into the place in the early ‘80s. We didn’t keep it. I was tempted, but …
I think spam is like twinkies; made entirely out of chemicals and so it never really expires.
Doesn't the existence of Newt Gingrich deflate that whole genre?
You had bacon every morning? Must be nice.
I save my bacon grease to cook Brussels sprouts.
Bacon grease also makes the best biscuits.
I'm fascinated that CNN was able to capture footage of the entanglement of 2 silver-maned word-manglers, which is quite rare the wild.
Oh, would that it were rare!
With – what? three jillion people on the planet? – why oh why do these same slimy trolls keep popping up on my TV? And why oh why do people who like to call themselves journalists keep asking them the same question like they're gonna say something real profound – instead spewing the same stinky verbal diahrrea?
Why oh why?
A friend of mine alway said this about someone he found intolerably annoying:
"They make my ass wanna chew chewing gum."
Now I know what he meant.
"A friend of mine alway said this about someone he found intolerably annoying:
"They make my ass wanna chew chewing gum.""
Is your friend Rowdy Roddy Piper?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wp_K8prLfso
When did Cooper come out as a journalist?
Me likey. More, please.
I remember when Anderson was the host of the ABC reality series 'The Mole'.
He was pretty OK in that – I think.
Or maybe he hosted that Boot Camp one.
I find it hard to dislike Anderson, mostly on the grounds that I have some very unclean thoughts about him.
You'll just have to shower with him, in your mind.
I'd rather mind him, in my shower, but thanks for the day-long distracting thoughts. ["Now, you've dropped the soap, again, Andy"]
Yes, Anderson did a good job. These deceitful fucks keep going on camera lying, then defending the lies, then explaining the lies, then explaining the explanations and it's going to be such sweet ammo for the good guys (figurative ammo, of course).
Evil animated garden gnome Newt Ginrich thinks it's ok to lie? Say it aint so?
Now I'm starting to doubt what that Keebler Elf said about his cookies!
The Newt would have made the ad more hard-hitting. Read: bigger and better lies.
Of the bald-faced variety. Such as.
You know who else was a fat, lying douchebag?
Rush?
Was? Rush? He's dead?
Oh. Nevermind.
Ya, the "was" got me, too. I was going with "Chris Christie" but now I'm going to have to actually think for a minute or two.
My thoughts are with you at this difficult time.
Wayne Root?
Well, Huckabee. And then he was skinny. And now he's back to being fat again, I think?
Hoobert Heever?
Olestra?
Ed, who I used to date?
This guy? http://ospois.wordpress.com/2008/11/13/all-u-want…
Oh, yeah, according to the link, there are several pictures of him that were taken by his wife… HIS WIFE!!
“Somebody who will lie to you to be president will lie to you as president.”
The projection is strong with this one.
Well, he would know.
Cut him some slack: he was merely lying about lying to you.
That old trick Captain Kirk used to disable the evil androids by telling them logically inconsistent things and making their logic circuits explode, that won't work on the Mittbot. We're doomed.
Number Six did it better. He just asked a computer: "W. H. Y. Question Mark. Why?" It exploded.
Calculate, to the last digit, the value of pi.
"The next sentence is true.
The last sentence was false."
Republicans: "Rules should only be followed when they aren't applied to me."
Also:
"It doesn't matter what evil sub-human bullshit we say or do. The bible thumpers are gonna vote for us anyway."
Why is Newt on TV? Does CNN pay him for these appearances, baby wants a new diamond ring? Or does he think he might get a job in the imaginary Romney Administration?
A better question is why does Mittens think that lump of lard would be an effective spokesman? I were Romney I would get a restraining order to keep that fat toad and his creepy wife 5 miles away from my campaign.
Well, if Willard thinks T-Rump is an effective spokesman, his standards are clearly not too exacting. And someone has to reach out to the pseudo-intellectual wing of his horrible, horrible coalition.
I'm beginning to suspect Mitt is pulling a Bialystock – he can't be playing to win, can he?
"I were Romney I would get a restraining order to keep that fat toad and his creepy wife 5 miles away from my campaign."
Maybe Romney and Callista were made in the same factory.
For newt and the entire gop, truth is a fungible resource. Im not sure what that means though…
It can be replaced with cheese mold.
It means that Newt is more familiar with the fungus growing between his rolls than he is with the truth.
Oh, and Callista? If he'll cheat with you, he'll cheat on you.
Nice. But those types always think theirs is the Golden Clincher that pins him down for good.
Guy I know, real playah, told me once that if he was married to or going out with the hottest chick you can imagine, he would probably be cheating on her inside of a month. Some guys just can't stand prosperity.
"He'll go the way the others went…
But you, my sweet, are different."
– Dorothy Parker
I'm convinced conservatives are zombies. They never go away and just keep getting more hateful and awful as this fucking "reelection" shit rolls on.
Do you guys remember when Gingrich was all "It's inevitable that I am going to be the Republican nominee"? That was my favorite day.
Creepy old men who hang around zoos, that's who I go to for moral guidance when I'm running an election campaign.
Newt is great 'cos he gives out free advice AND hard candies.
Romney/Gringrich ????
If he picks Newt as his running mate, Obama wins 40 states, easy.
*crosses fingers*
Oh, please please please…
Half the country only wants to hear lies. Unfortunately mitt is their man.
I respect Newt and all, but frankly, I'm holding off judgement on this until I hear what Sarah has to say on Hannity.
Dear Obama campaign, please to run clips of all these assholes bashing RMomey for being a dishonest asshole. Thank you.
Not "bipartisan" enough, somehow.
Well, since Rmoney is paying his campaign debts, Newt has to at least cover for Willard on demand.
Wait. So all it takes for my financial worries to go away is to run against Romney?
I'd like to announce my candidacy for the Republican nomination for President.
You gotta make him sweat a little. And poll in the 20-percent range.
But you also run the risk of Mitt's team smearing your good name like they did with Santorum, Cain, and Newt. All pillars of their communities until Mitt unleashed his attack team on them.
Wait, what?
There's the truth *despondently shakes head "No"*
And "the truth!" *smiles wide and excitedly shakes head "Yes"*
Good for Newt. Mitt has one-upped him though. Mitt feels it's just fine to lie when he opens his mouth.
Now wait just a fucking minute!! Now there's a banner at the top of Wonkette with a sleeping, white-paint-speckled baby with fairy wings who wants me to become a social worker! Has someone coated my keyboard with a digitally-delivered (see what I did there?) hallucinogen?!
I don't know about you, but I'm about to call my sister-in-law, pay my cable bill, and earn my BACHELOR'S DEGREE!
Then I can wonder into the uncanny valley of baby social worker.
It's like, do the advertisers think that Wonkette's mostly visited by children who are still in high school? No we are adults and already have our bachelor's.
that's what we get for the posts explaining the truth about for-profit schools and the student loan racket. I'm looking forward to the ads encouraging me to join Central American Death Squads that will appear shortly.
Ooh! Sounds adventurous!
I'm getting that, too. It's like the ending of 2001.
My god, it's full of babies.
Becks, you know I love you long time, but please, in the name of all things decent and otherwise, DO NOT use the words "long," "hard," "receiving end," and "Newt Gingrich" in the same post.
*goes off to a quiet corner to have a whimper*
This conversation was picked up yesterday by the NSA, according to NSA Weekly, a trade publication for all those people interested in the NSA and what the NSA does:
Romney: Gingrich, if you continue to say stupid things, you won't get that Commerce Department post.
Gingrich: Mittens, if you continue to say stupid things, the only thing you'll be president of us is the local Elks Lodge somewhere in Utah, or whatever state you're from.
Romney: You're nothing but a poseur and a doofus. Forget Commerce. Forget anything. You're not getting a Cabinet post, moron.
Gingrich: Good! I make more money with lousy speeches, phony PACs, scamming jewelry at pawn shops, corporate boards, gun endorsements, oil endorsements, Komen endorsements, political consulting for the tea party, and my personal line of beer mugs.
Romney: Hey, can you get me one of those mugs, gratis?
Gingrich: You're worth 240 million, and you can't buy a beer mug? You're worthless.
Romney: So are you.
# # #
*sissyish slap fight ensues*
Mitt: Take that!
Newt: Take that!
Mitt: At least MY religion says I'm *supposed* to have a lot of wives! [slap]
Newt: Like you could GET them, except with a roll of hundreds! [slap]
Mitt: You're one to talk, you Papist whoremonger! [slap]
Newt: At least MY religion isn't some fake, made-up bullshit! [slap]
Mitt: Whore diamonds! [slap]
Newt: Dog killer! [slap]
Mitt: Maybe I should've waited until my dog got cancer, and then gotten a new one! [slap]
Newt: At least *my* wife doesn't have an eagle biting her tit! [slap]
Mitt: No, she has a *pig* biting her tit! [slap]
Newt: Pansy! [slap]
Mitt: Fatass! [slap]
Newt: Faggot! [slap]
Mitt [inarticulate gurgling noise as Newt sits on him and crushes him]
Newt: OW!! Oh, son of a BITCH! You BIT me!!
etc.
"What is truth….? No, really, what is it?"- Newt Gingrich.
One of the things I miss most from UK, well, actually my Grandmother's Fry-Up. fried eggs, bacon-good English bacon back-rashers, fried tomatoes, fried bread and kidneys. Delicious! It's a wonder I didn't have a heart condition at age 11.
"fried bread"
I am intr1gued.
How do you fry bread?
Do you drop little wads of bread dough into the hot oil/bacon grease?
Or do you take a slice of already baked bread and fry it in the frying pan, like french toast?
We make zeppoles by deep-frying bread dough; if you live in NYC, you've probably already tried them. Good on the lips, then sink to the bottom of your belly like the Titanic.
It has to be white bread, preference would be Mother's Pride-UK equivalent of Wonderbread, cook the bacon first and then just drop in a couple of slices of bread turn when browned. Easy! Delicious! Greasy!
"Easy! Delicious! Greasy!" have been used to describe me, too.
Newtie is taking one from the Mormon missionary handbook which OKs lying to a prospective convert if it brings them to the truth of Joseph Smith. Lying is a Mormon's greatest tool. Can anyone say "Prop 8"?
For a second there, I thought you wrote Moonies.
spent nearly $3 million on ads in Iowa
For that, you could buy every voter a choice Iowa hooker.
Or a pig.
But I repeat myself…
Gingrich is just speaking from personal experience: it's impossible to open your mouth, have words come out for a whole 30 seconds, and not have at least some of those words be lies.
It's not a lie if the check you wrote for the ad bounces.
I'm a Marxist of the Groucho kind
I like Marx and Lennon.
"diuretics"
You read that Scientology stuff?
That is Neville, he is my special needs boy, very, very stupid, very , very lovely.He is enormous.
Scientology causes you to bounce on couches.
Comments on this entry are closed.