TWATS  1:41 pm August 7, 2012

Bryan Fischer: Sikh-Temple Shooter Hated Herman Cain, Was A Liberal, Q.E.D.

by Rebecca Schoenkopf

Q.E.Duh.

Doodly doodly doo, twitter twitter twitter. Oh, what’s this? Bryan Fischer, of the wonderful and loving and Christian in totally the best sense of the religion American Family Association, do you have some Thoughts on the Sikh temple massacre, which you think would be important to share with the world? FANTASTIC. But hmmm, we are not sure that we follow the logic, as shown in your twit above. A neo-Nazi hated a Republican — who was black — and so must be a liberal? Might there be another reason for a neo-Nazi to hate a black man? Maybe because that is kind of their whole thing?

Maybe the white power aficionado who shot up all those Sikh people should have remembered to have a Derbyshirian black friend so that it was clear regarding his Herman Cain-hating that he hated Cain because Cain is a Republican, not because he is a black man. But since the white power aficionado who shot up all those Sikh people did not have the foresight to have a black friend, so as to differentiate between those hatreds based on skin color and those hatreds based on Republicanness, we are going to have to stick with the simplest solution as provided by Occam’s Razor: that Bryan Fischer is a fucking idiot.

Scrolling back through Fischer’s timeline, in a fruitless search for any commentary on the temple massacre that didn’t involve telling them to get guns or explaining that hating Herman Cain makes the shooter ipso facto a liberal, we came upon this:

So, yeah. It might be time for Fischer to find a Derbyshirian black friend too.

[Twitter]

 
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{ 181 comments }

viennawoods13 August 7, 2012 at 1:43 pm

OT, but everyone, go to Colbert and watch last night's show. His guest was Pete Seeger. It will make you happy. We live in a world where Brietbart is dead and Pete Seeger lives; someone must love us.

natoslug August 7, 2012 at 1:55 pm

You had me at Breitbart is dead.

mormos August 7, 2012 at 2:09 pm

the folk singer? fuck. yes. i didn't know he was still alive. you would not believe the amount of pete seeger i have on my computer.

James Michael Curley August 7, 2012 at 2:13 pm

Still alive and still hosting a Clearwater Eco cruise at least once a year.

Chet Kincaid_ August 7, 2012 at 2:29 pm

How much did you pay for? I have to ask, with you kids today.

OneYieldRegular August 7, 2012 at 2:55 pm

I saw Pete Seeger perform when I was only a quarter his age. Union rules meant that the show had to stop at a certain hour, so he just kept playing while strolling out of the theater and into the street, where everyone (almost certainly including the union folks) followed him for a continuation of the concert.

mormos August 14, 2012 at 2:25 am

that is literally the coolest thing i have ever heard

Tequila Mockingbird August 7, 2012 at 1:43 pm

I'll bet the temple shooter also thought O.J. was guilty.

actor212 August 7, 2012 at 1:53 pm

He asked Casey Anthony out on a date, too.

ChernobylSoup August 7, 2012 at 1:56 pm

You're saying she's available?!?!

actor212 August 7, 2012 at 1:58 pm

She's not a single parent anymore.

ChernobylSoup August 7, 2012 at 2:03 pm

I'm not looking for a date, just a babysitter.

Schmannnity August 7, 2012 at 1:44 pm

Is a left-wing fascist anything like a right-wing communist?

actor212 August 7, 2012 at 1:54 pm

According to Jonah Goldberg, yes.

Actually he may have a point: it's possible that Page was less of a hater than your average fascist, which would make him a left-wing fascist.

usuhname August 8, 2012 at 12:15 pm

No, a left-wing fascist is more akin to a Stalinist Hitler. A right-wing communist is actually just a secret liberal traitor.
See, right-wing is *Only Ever A Good Thing* – FOREVERZ x MILLION > ARGUMENT WUN

ChernobylSoup August 7, 2012 at 1:45 pm

Some of my best straw men are black.

SorosBot August 7, 2012 at 1:45 pm

Uh, dude, "leftwing fascist neo-Nazi" is kind of an oxymoron; what's next, "rightwing communist neo-Soviet"?

Generation[redacted] August 7, 2012 at 1:48 pm

Don't forget the dreaded fifth wing. You never know where that's coming from.

mavenmaven August 7, 2012 at 1:55 pm

No, because all of their Orwellian "history" is to deflect any criticism of themselves. So anything bad in history is, though their miraculous chalkboard, "left". Genghis Khan, for example, who was tolerant of religions and gender, was obviously a leftist.

emmelemm August 7, 2012 at 2:01 pm

Wait… Genghis Khan was tolerant of religions and gender?

MosesInvests August 7, 2012 at 2:05 pm

Gender I don't know about, but the Mongols were known for being tolerant of religion. If you didn't fight him, the Khan of Khans didn't care at all who you worshiped, and religious institutions, all of them, were protected in the Mongol Empire.

mavenmaven August 7, 2012 at 2:22 pm

Yes, and women had a more equal part in Mongol society.

CthuNHu August 7, 2012 at 3:23 pm

"If you didn't fight him, the Khan of Khans didn't care at all who you worshiped…"

Well, I wouldn't exactly say that. More like, "If he didn't have a hankering to kill you and level your village/city/kingdom, or even if he did, the Khan of Khans didn't care at all who you worshiped…"

CthuNHu August 7, 2012 at 3:26 pm

Um, actually, I think Russia's got those. And they probably overlap a fair bit with the neo-Nazis. But then "communist" means something a wee bit different in ex-commie countries than it does elsewhere.

Beowoof August 7, 2012 at 3:36 pm

Well the right wing has gone so far right, they have become Stalinists.

Willardbot9000_V2.5 August 7, 2012 at 5:29 pm

Yes…they say fascists were leftwing based upon the absolutely airtight explanation that Hitler loved sugar, leftists like sugar so Hitler was a leftist. Nevermind the racism, or the hostility to equality by the law or the religious bigotry, hatred of socialists and communists and the notion of society being permanently at war with everyone and everything. I mean, Hitler liked sugar and apparently was somewhat of an environmentalist (though not nearly as much so old-conservative standard bearer Richard Nixon or Barry Goldwater) therefore he's a liberal. That's pretty much the entire argument in a nutshell…alongside the socialist in national socialist…and Hitler DID like sugar…

Butch_Wagstaff August 7, 2012 at 6:20 pm

These are things now because no one knows what those "ism" words really mean any more.

Blueb4sinrise August 7, 2012 at 1:45 pm

WHAT

Blueb4sinrise August 7, 2012 at 1:45 pm

THE

Blueb4sinrise August 7, 2012 at 1:45 pm

FUCK?

actor212 August 7, 2012 at 1:54 pm

HEY! No fair tripling down on your p-ness!

BigSkullF*ckingDog August 7, 2012 at 1:57 pm

Your awfully insecure considering the size of your pness.

actor212 August 7, 2012 at 1:59 pm

The shower was cold in that video.

ChernobylSoup August 7, 2012 at 1:57 pm

I only upthumbed the THE, just to keep him off balance.

proudgrampa August 7, 2012 at 2:50 pm

Me, too.

Blueb4sinrise August 7, 2012 at 2:36 pm

I was shocked that I managed to get three at the beginning of a thread without misspelling 'what the fuck'.

arihaya August 7, 2012 at 2:25 pm

KKK-KOMBO BREAKER

pun intended

slowhansolo August 7, 2012 at 1:46 pm

Greensky Bluegrass.

GunToting[Redacted] August 7, 2012 at 2:16 pm

I'm not sure what this has to do with anything, but I really don't care. Saw them a couple of times at Telluride, including the year they won the band competition.

AlterNewt August 7, 2012 at 1:46 pm

People be thinkin funny. It aint right.

BigSkullF*ckingDog August 7, 2012 at 1:46 pm

I cracked your code Bryan Fischer. "Underground Railroad" is the name of a gay sex club.

Fare la Volpe August 7, 2012 at 2:21 pm

Sling low, sweet bondage queen
Cummin' for to carry me bone

Butch_Wagstaff August 7, 2012 at 6:21 pm

*claps*

Beowoof August 7, 2012 at 3:37 pm

Don't worry Brian, someone will be driving that train into your tunnel later.

Callyson August 7, 2012 at 1:47 pm

Do tell, Wikipedia, how credible a source is Bryan Fischer?

In November 2010, the SPLC changed their listing of the AFA from a group that used hate speech to the more serious one of being designated a hate group.
The SPLC's Mark Potok said that the AFA's "propagation of known falsehoods and demonizing propaganda" was the basis for the change. Fischer's anti-gay comments were given as an example by SPLC in support of the hate group designation.
Recently, Fischer has become a supporter of the AIDS denial movement. His guest on the January 3, 2012 edition of Focal Point was prominent AIDS denialist Peter Duesberg. On that show, Fischer strongly supported Duesberg's contention that AIDS is not caused by HIV, but by recreational drug use.

Yeah, this guy's a real authority on racial issues, or any other issues for that matter.

JFC…

usuhname August 8, 2012 at 12:26 pm

Don't no one never tell an Amerikan they don't know what do for kooks. GOLD 4 EVER.

Goonemeritus August 7, 2012 at 1:47 pm

Stalin hated FDR I guess he was a Republican.

Larry McAwful August 7, 2012 at 1:52 pm

Well, your enemies' enemies are your friends, so… yeah!

Kidneys4Sale August 7, 2012 at 2:27 pm

You know who ELSE ha….

I cant even finish.

Fare la Volpe August 7, 2012 at 2:30 pm

You know who else hated FDR?

Mrs. FDR.

According to Ellie, Frankie boy was like a dead fish in the sack.

Boojum August 7, 2012 at 3:40 pm

Um, POLIO!

Not to mention, Eleanor.

Generation[redacted] August 7, 2012 at 1:47 pm

I have a dream that one day we will be judged not by the color of our skin, but by the content of arbitrary labels assigned by others who disagree with us on one or more issues.

BaldarTFlagass August 7, 2012 at 1:47 pm

How does Fischer know that Wade Page detested Herman Cain? Did Page post here at Wonkette?

actor212 August 7, 2012 at 1:55 pm

Herman Cain is "black". QED

No. Really. That's all Fischer needs to know.

tessiee August 7, 2012 at 2:04 pm

"How does Fischer know that Wade Page detested Herman Cain?"

to be fair, it's a pretty safe guess.

chicken_thief August 7, 2012 at 2:14 pm

Duh. 9-9-9. 9 mm. Connect the dots, sheeplez!!!!!!

mavenmaven August 7, 2012 at 1:48 pm

Oh my, I predicted an attack on Sikhs here a few weeks ago, and earlier today posted a parody comment about nazis being leftists. I did not envisage a day when my worst nightmares would become every day life in America.

ChernobylSoup August 7, 2012 at 1:52 pm

If you posted anything in 2007 about the economy being anything less than stable, we're going to have to take away your keyboard.

actor212 August 7, 2012 at 1:56 pm

If you call Kevin Bacon dead, so help me God I will hunt you down and vote you!

mavenmaven August 7, 2012 at 2:24 pm

And apparently I did post something once about being abused by my fellow wonketteers :)

proudgrampa August 7, 2012 at 2:54 pm

But we only do so out of love and respect.

Fukui-sanYesOta August 7, 2012 at 3:04 pm

Surveyor's insults.

Chet Kincaid_ August 7, 2012 at 3:22 pm

Don't worry, your life is only a science fiction movie we're watching.

Fukui-sanYesOta August 7, 2012 at 1:48 pm

"Takes care of that whole right wing Tea Party meme"

I am utterly flummoxed as to what he's trying to get at here. The Tea Party is left wing? The Tea Party aren't racist because, uuh, what?

It makes no fucking sense whatsoever, therefore Bryan Fischer is a world class dolt.

Generation[redacted] August 7, 2012 at 1:52 pm

So he's tea party because of his ties to StormFront, which is not right wing because they hate black Republicans.

I get it now!

Fukui-sanYesOta August 7, 2012 at 2:00 pm

Fischer later claimed that Hitler was obviously Iranian because he wasn't keen on ham-dodgers.

James Michael Curley August 7, 2012 at 2:57 pm

Than sounds interesting and Ms. Lindsey Graham would go all liquid.

Monsieur_Grumpe August 7, 2012 at 1:48 pm

Bryan Fischer's brain is a few bricks shy of running on three cylinders with marbles rolling around loose at the lobotomy farm.

ChernobylSoup August 7, 2012 at 1:53 pm

Are you saying his thought train has a loose dull knife?

actor212 August 7, 2012 at 1:56 pm

He's not the brightest bulb in the crayon box, no.

GunToting[Redacted] August 7, 2012 at 2:18 pm

He's not the sharpest doorknob in the loaf.

HogeyeGrex August 7, 2012 at 2:24 pm

Definitely a few cans short of a full deck.

Fare la Volpe August 7, 2012 at 2:31 pm

He's kinda dumb too.

Whatever August 7, 2012 at 2:36 pm

A couple of loose screws from a picnic?

proudgrampa August 7, 2012 at 2:56 pm

A couple of keys missing from the keyboard?

Chet Kincaid_ August 7, 2012 at 3:25 pm

You're doing it wrong.

proudgrampa August 7, 2012 at 3:41 pm

I am constitutionally unable to mix metaphors.

Chet Kincaid_ August 7, 2012 at 3:51 pm

It says it right there in the Third Commandment to the Constitution!

EatFrankRich August 7, 2012 at 3:34 pm

A few tacos short of a Happy Meal?

BaldarTFlagass August 7, 2012 at 1:49 pm

He hated Cain because he once ate at Godfather's Pizza. You would too, if you did that.

BigSkullF*ckingDog August 7, 2012 at 1:53 pm

I worked there while in high school. Don't even get me started. Pretty sure I got a permanent injury from opening up cans of, well, everything.

actor212 August 7, 2012 at 2:01 pm

Did the boxes come in cans? Cause that would be meta.

BaldarTFlagass August 7, 2012 at 1:50 pm

How come Fischer didn't spell it "facist?" I thought that was the righty way.

Larry McAwful August 7, 2012 at 1:50 pm

Does this mean that all the Republicans who worked so hard to deny Herman Cain the presidential nomination are also liberals who are planning to shoot up Sikh temples?

Politics are getting so hard to keep up with these days.

Extemporanus August 7, 2012 at 1:50 pm

Timothy McVeigh detested moving trucks.

RadioBowels August 7, 2012 at 2:46 pm

Why do you hate the troops?

Extemporanus August 7, 2012 at 2:54 pm

It gives me something to do now that I've stopped beating my wife.

iburl August 7, 2012 at 1:50 pm

Drug Limpballs and his ilk have been, for decades, hammering in the deranged concept that the Nazi party were "Liberals." This is some of the sweet, sweet fruit of their hard work.

HogeyeGrex August 7, 2012 at 2:34 pm

And The Doughy Pantload "wrote" a whole book on the subject, just so that this sort of drivel might have some sort of pseudo-intellectual backup.

feh

Back in the day, the Right had the class and sense to be embarrassed about and marginalize these sorts of people. Nowadays, Neo-Nazis aren't right-wing enough for mainstream Republicans. WTF happened to my country?

Mittens Howell, III August 7, 2012 at 1:51 pm

He detested Cain, but ate fuckloads of Chick-fil-A sandwiches.

Larry McAwful August 7, 2012 at 1:56 pm

It makes sense that he ate fuckloads of Chick-fil-A sandwiches. That explains why he didn't care if the cops shot him—he was probably going to die, anyway.

emmelemm August 7, 2012 at 1:51 pm

Clearly, Bryan Fischer has end-stage syphilis. It's the only explanation for this level of confusion.

rickmaci August 7, 2012 at 2:38 pm

Crystal meth addiction and rent-a-boys might also.

GlowneyHouse August 7, 2012 at 2:56 pm

From the looks of him the only way he could even GET syphilis is by eating off toilet seats.

tessiee August 7, 2012 at 1:51 pm

Meh, who cares? I heard some guy from Rutgers said that Bryan Fischer was full of shit.

annettaj August 7, 2012 at 1:51 pm

Bryan is just pissed cause he looks like James Brolin, only with Jeebus and a smaller weenie.

ph7 August 7, 2012 at 1:51 pm

This doesn't make sense even to my dog, and she ate from the kitty litter this morning.

bumfug August 7, 2012 at 1:51 pm

Shooter's plan was obviously to kill all the Sikhs then turn the temple into a Planned Parenthood office. Fuckin' sneaky-ass liberals.

edgydrifter August 7, 2012 at 1:51 pm

Herman Cain has a penis, so Wade Michael Page was probably a man-hating feminazi, too.

rmjagg August 7, 2012 at 4:18 pm

wade is such a little bitch …

Wadisay August 7, 2012 at 1:52 pm

Still waiting word on whether the temple shooter had a stash of porn showing Obama swimming in Hawaii.

Groupshrug August 7, 2012 at 1:52 pm

If there's one thing us Liberals hate, it's foreigners who wear funny hats.

And if there's one thing us Liberals love, it's solving our problems with guns.

actor212 August 7, 2012 at 1:53 pm

Normally, it's sad to see someone crack and blow their minds away.

In Fischer's case, please pass the popcorn.

HistoriCat August 7, 2012 at 2:13 pm

Bryan Fischer is a fixture in the world o' crazy … this is nothing. Just don't get him started on bears.

lulzmonger August 8, 2012 at 3:41 am

A dust-mite breaking wind could blow Fischer's mind away.

NorthStarSpanx August 7, 2012 at 1:54 pm

Will the oppression of his people ever come to light by the Lamstream Media?

tessiee August 7, 2012 at 1:54 pm

I'm not that much of a history geek, but iirc, weren't Naziism and Fascism formed specifically in counter-reaction against leftist thought and politics, at least in part?

*checks wiki*
Yup.

mavenmaven August 7, 2012 at 1:58 pm

Wiki is part of the 'conspiracy', don't you know?
You need to put on your tinfoil hat, grab your gun, and listen to Glenn Beck more, who started this National SOCIALISM meme. It does, in fact, boggle the mind.

JustPixelz August 7, 2012 at 2:40 pm

Not so fast missy. The conservapedia says "Wikipedia is a politically left leaning communist online wiki-based encyclopedia…".

Anyway, conservapedia says Roosevelt's New Deal was fascist, so your theory of counter-reaction is wrong. Unless conservapedia is in The No Fact Zone™.

Chet Kincaid_ August 7, 2012 at 3:28 pm

You had to check?

mrblifil August 7, 2012 at 1:55 pm

This can all be settled by finding out how often he used to eat at Chick-Fil-A.

proudgrampa August 7, 2012 at 3:02 pm

That, or how many Twinkies he ate every day.

SayItWithWookies August 7, 2012 at 1:57 pm

And Bryan Fischer makes excuses for the behavior of a homicidal paranoid racist — which says all that needs to be said about Bryan Fischer and the AFA.

fartknocker August 7, 2012 at 1:57 pm

I don't give shit about Bryan Fischer, Fred Phelps, Pat Robertson or any of these other so-called religion icons of hate and utter stupidity.

Mittens Howell, III August 7, 2012 at 1:57 pm

Newsflash: Herman Cain Hating White-Supremacist Is Obiously Obama Loving White-Supremacist!!

Thanks for reading Wingnut Weekly.

Blueb4sinrise August 7, 2012 at 1:58 pm

Thank you all for the fisting above. You're very kind to a bitter derelict.

Chet Kincaid_ August 7, 2012 at 3:30 pm

What will you do with your winnings?

Blueb4sinrise August 7, 2012 at 3:44 pm

Actually, I'm kinda sore right now………maybe a soak in the tub.

Eventually I hope to divide the fistings into parts and sell each section to multiple buyers. Then arrange bets on both sides as to which of the buyers will profit .

Or maybe trade for hobo beans.

tessiee August 7, 2012 at 1:58 pm

Sarcastic Wonka:
"Oh, you're trying to say that the Tea Party isn't really right wing? Why, is the right wing not popular or respected?"

a_pink_poodle August 7, 2012 at 1:59 pm

Because we all know how liberal neo-Nazi's are. Embracing gay, minority and women rights as well as defending Muslims from Bachmannism, wanting to open the country to immigration and enact universal healthcare. In fact, Nazi Germany was a liberal paradise where everyone had equal rights and no one was discriminated based on their culture or origin!

widestanceromance August 7, 2012 at 1:59 pm

Wait, I kin haz strate slayves?

tessiee August 7, 2012 at 2:00 pm

"Might there be another reason for a neo-Nazi to hate a black man? Maybe because that is kind of their whole thing?"

Also, might there be a reason for someone who doesn't hate black people in general to *still* think Herman Cain is a smarmy asshat?

HogeyeGrex August 7, 2012 at 2:41 pm

Nahhhh. Everybody on the Right lurves them some Herms. That's why he won the Presidential primary.

Mittens Howell, III August 7, 2012 at 2:00 pm

My brain can't handle this, I feel like I'm on acid at a Dianna Ross and The White Supremes concert.

ChillBill August 7, 2012 at 2:00 pm

“When fascism comes to America, it will come wrapped in the flag and waving a cross…held by Brian Fischer.”

Jus_Wonderin August 7, 2012 at 2:01 pm

Any idea what we might cram down Bryan Fischer's throat?

Biel_ze_Bubba August 7, 2012 at 2:09 pm

20 lbs of Portland cement, for starters.

Fukui-sanYesOta August 7, 2012 at 2:10 pm

Justin Bieber.

Estproph August 7, 2012 at 2:17 pm

The truth won't work, unfortunately.

Barrelhse August 7, 2012 at 3:17 pm

The staff of Cain.

kittensdontlie August 7, 2012 at 2:01 pm

Duh…Herman Cain is as liberal as apple pie. His skirt-chasing/cohabitating, and that 9-9-9 plan(code for 6-6-6)….this man is a liberal devil.

JustPixelz August 7, 2012 at 2:28 pm

"a liberal devil"

"a liberal".
-fixed

Oblios_Cap August 7, 2012 at 2:01 pm

Is Bryan Fischer the king of Bizarro World?

ChernobylSoup August 7, 2012 at 2:10 pm

Wouldn't being King of Bizarro World just make him a peasant? More like "Is Bryan Fischer the lowest untouchable of Bizarro World?"!

You gotta think these things through, man.

tessiee August 7, 2012 at 2:01 pm

"Straights=slaves"

*hopefully*
Naughty slaves, who need to be spanked on their saucy bare bottoms?

Typodong3 August 7, 2012 at 2:08 pm

That made me laugh.

MosesInvests August 7, 2012 at 2:10 pm

You been hanging out at Castle Anthrax?

Angry_Marmot August 7, 2012 at 4:02 pm

Oh, wicked, bad, naughty Zoot!

elviouslyqueer August 7, 2012 at 2:02 pm

Um, Bryan? Zombie Harriet Tubman would like to have a word. Right after she kicks you square in the nuts.

mrpuma2u August 7, 2012 at 2:02 pm

Well yeah QED cuz no tea party jaggoffs sent emails with the white house lawn covered in a watermelon patch, oh wait yeah… nevermind. Twats shouldn't twitter.

actor212 August 7, 2012 at 2:03 pm
mormos August 7, 2012 at 2:04 pm

those left wing facists man, ruining it for everbody

MissTaken August 7, 2012 at 2:04 pm

Leftwing fascist neo-Nazi

See? Nazi is National Socialist = Socialist = Liberal = Leftwing = Left-handed = Obama = Kenya = British colony = British people sometimes holiday in Italy = Mussolini = Fascist = Bryan Fischer is a fucking lunatic

SorosBot August 7, 2012 at 2:34 pm

Plus, Up – Up – Down – Down – Left – Right – Left – Right – B – A – Select – Start = 30 Lives, therefore the Contras are heroic freedom fighters.

MLite August 7, 2012 at 2:06 pm

The New Black Panthers are the real neo-Nazis.

timbo71351 August 7, 2012 at 2:07 pm

I've said it before, I'll say it again: I can't wait for the day Bryan Fischer gets busted with a "wide stance" in the men's room at a Greyhound bus station.

Typodong3 August 7, 2012 at 2:08 pm

No no no no. He hates Cain because Cain is a conservative! Didnt you know, all skinheads are fluffy bunny panda kissing anti-gun carebear liberals? Sheesh. Pay attention.

randcoolcatdaddy August 7, 2012 at 2:08 pm

Underground Railroad, eh?

I take it he's endorsing international child kidnapping?

actor212 August 7, 2012 at 2:09 pm

So long as you drop them off back at the swing set.

chicken_thief August 7, 2012 at 2:12 pm

I'm holding off judgement until Sarah has had a chance to weigh in on this.

pdiddycornchips August 7, 2012 at 2:15 pm

Bryan should track down some of the shooter's band mates and get their take on things.

"Hi, I'm Bryan Fischer"

"Fischer? Sounds Jewish…BLAM, BLAM!!!"

James Michael Curley August 7, 2012 at 2:18 pm

I have a real problem with the Leftwing Fascist on my house. The builder installed it without venting so moisture forms in the eaves and leave a musty ordor. Now the Rightwing Fascist vents excessively and sometimes it keeps me awake at night.

BZ1 August 7, 2012 at 2:18 pm

"Leftwing fascist" and no irony intended, just simplemindedness.

Estproph August 7, 2012 at 2:20 pm

Fischer comes up with a doozy, and me without any rotten tomatoes to throw at him…

AutomaticPilot August 7, 2012 at 2:21 pm

Hey, say what you want about Bryan Fischer, but the guy was one heck of a chess player.

arihaya August 7, 2012 at 2:29 pm

"Straights=slaves"

I confess, i have that (sexual) fantasy too.

Is that mean I am a wingnut now? oh noes.

Fraudulently_Joe August 7, 2012 at 2:39 pm

I'm going to go out on a limb and speculate that he didn't think overmuch of President Barack Obama.

horsedreamer_1 August 7, 2012 at 6:35 pm

Page was also a PUMA.

rickmaci August 7, 2012 at 2:41 pm

Christianinsanity. That man needs a good blind faith healer.

James Michael Curley August 7, 2012 at 3:02 pm

Only Blind Faith healer I know.

Fraudulently_Joe August 7, 2012 at 2:42 pm

Christ, this really is exactly like how Anders Behring Breivik was supposed to be a left-winger, even though he killed lefty children, and approvingly cited the Islamaphobic far-right in his manifesto, repeatedly.

I mean, whenever the far-right took a break from talking about how the mass-murder was a totally-understandable response to the shariah-enabling liberals and you really can't blame him for finally fighting back, that is.

KeepFnThatChicken August 7, 2012 at 3:00 pm

Bryan Fischer is a fucking idiot

I am sorry to say that there are no upfists for the writer, because Editrix, you deserve one for this deft line in coordination with the Occam's Razor reference.

Author! Author!!

Chet Kincaid_ August 7, 2012 at 3:07 pm

Dance for us, Foole! Tweet the next thing that pops into that pebble-sized brain beneath your tinkling bells! Hohohoho! (swings leg of mutton)

Barrelhse August 7, 2012 at 3:16 pm

Goddamn "left-wing fascist neo-Nazis."

DahBoner August 7, 2012 at 3:36 pm

We're being enslaved by Blacks and gays Republicunts and The NRA.

Fixed!

fawkedifiknow August 7, 2012 at 3:38 pm

So, does this mean the American Family Association is officially BFF with the philandering, sexual assaulting, two timing womanizer, Herman Cain?

They've changed their mission in life, I guess.

docterry6973 August 7, 2012 at 3:45 pm

You can't argue with logic. I guess Bryan got us this time.

Billmatic August 7, 2012 at 3:51 pm

How could anyone hate someone who brought so much entertainment to our lives?

Chet Kincaid_ August 7, 2012 at 3:58 pm

"In a world where Straights are Slaves, forced to breed at the command of their Gay Overlords…" That is the first pitch Roger Corman has gotten excited about in years! Is Adrienne Barbeau still working?!

horsedreamer_1 August 7, 2012 at 6:37 pm

Fischer is implying Page was racist, which means Fischer is racist for the implication.

BoroPrimorac August 7, 2012 at 7:14 pm

Now you know why Jonah Goldberg will never, never, never, ever get a Pulitzer.

ugodOH August 7, 2012 at 7:15 pm

No, you see, the shooter was a Nazi, you know, National SOCIALIST! Socialist=leftist=liberal. Kind of like how Bryan Fischer is president of the American Family ASSOCIATION. What other group is called an "Association"? How about the North American Man Boy Love ASSOCIATION! Aha! I can play word "association" too.

ttommyunger August 7, 2012 at 7:36 pm

Gosh, Bryan, but we all hate Herman Cain; almost as much as we hate you. Nothing personal, it's just the bigoted moron thing.

lulzmonger August 8, 2012 at 3:51 am

Bryan Fischer : "Now that the spirochetes have had a generous buffet courtesy of my frontal lobes, EVERYTHING IS PERFECTLY CLEAR NOW."

Fraudulently_Joe August 8, 2012 at 9:27 am

Just to be clear, Bryan Fischer is advocating the organized kidnapping of children in same-sex households.

Hmm, maybe we should ask North Carolina state Rep. Larry Pittman what an appropriate Christian punishment for murderers (and I would include abortionists, rapists, and kidnappers, as well) is, in this sort of situation.

Fraudulently_Joe August 8, 2012 at 9:30 am

Incidentally, you know who else started an "Underground Railroad" to remove children of undesirables from their unsuitable homes?

Goddamn those left-wing liberal fascists, who were praised by William Buckley for doing these exact things.

usuhname August 8, 2012 at 12:06 pm

Give him a break – Bryan Fischer just doesn't see color.
Or see the moments when you should simply STFU. Or common sense. Or reality…

chicken_thief August 7, 2012 at 2:06 pm

Shoulda called last month when Jerry Sandusky was still available…

HistoriCat August 7, 2012 at 2:17 pm

You have to admire a babysitter who gives the personal touch.

Chet Kincaid_ August 7, 2012 at 3:14 pm

Nobody ever gives him credit for the thousands of kids he didn't molest!

chicken_thief August 7, 2012 at 3:39 pm

Herman, that you?!

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