Did you know that Barack Hussein NOoBaMA is such a racist against white people, because three black dudes were idiots outside a Philadelphia polling site once, and also because how dare he say the Cambridge police acted stupidly just because they arrested a black Harvard professor inside his own home, for B&E? Yup, that sure is racist! How do we know? Because this jolly fellow — who actually tried to tie John Kerry to Willie Horton like 40 years after the whole world was all “gee, sorry about that Willie Horton thing, Michael Dukakis” — says so! And he says the Henry Louis Gates/Cambridge cop thing was racist — on Gates’ part! And Barack Obama is racist for loving him, it is just obvious. And this fellow, Stephen Marks, with this new FIghtBigotry super-PAC, has a long history of recognizing racism when he sees it, which is often, because he is the usually the one who is doing it.

Here he is (via ThinkProgress), Mr. America:

The Obama administration has injected race into the presidential campaign. Obama Attorney General Eric Holder recently said – with no argument from the president – that their white critics are motivated by race. Implying whites are too stupid to have honest disagreements with the president without being racist is in-and-of-itself racist against whites, reinforcing Mr. Obama’s disturbing pattern of tacitly defending black racism. …

Obama’s attorney general said pursuing the New Black Panthers does a great disservice to whose “who risked all, for my people.” So it’s okay for his people to commit racial crimes? In 2009, President Obama defended his friend Henry Louis Gates after a racist altercation with police, telling a white officer he wouldn’t speak to him but would speak to his mama. Mr. Obama’s response? “The Cambridge police acted stupidly.” …

Mr. President, you ran as the candidate of change. But one thing has not changed—your tacit defense of racism against white folks, despite receiving nearly half the white vote to win the presidency.

So, that New Black Panther thing, what the fuck’s that about? SURELY Eric Holder didn’t say he wasn’t prosecuting them because they had done so much for his people? YEAH, NO. Here’s the unabridged version:

“Think about that,” Holder said. “When you compare what people endured in the South in the 60s to try to get the right to vote for African Americans, and to compare what people were subjected to there to what happened in Philadelphia—which was inappropriate, certainly that…to describe it in those terms I think does a great disservice to people who put their lives on the line, who risked all, for my people,” said Holder, who is black.

That is some Mitt Romney-level abridgement, right there. Romney-Marks, 2012!


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  • zippy_w_pinhead

    Romney-Marks: otherwise known as skid marks that can be removed by shaking your magic underwear…

    • All the shaking ain't gonna get rid of Mitt's dingleberries.

  • Callyson

    And now MLK has a nightmare today, thanks for being grossly misused in this ad.


  • Fight "bigotry"…with actual bigotry.

    • Fare la Volpe

      Same reason fire departments carry flamethrowers to put out fires. Logic!

  • Mittens Howell, III

    'RIghtBigotry super-PAC'


  • Being black in public is evidence of your racism against white people!! How is it racist to point out this simple fact!?

    • Billmatic


      • BigSkullF*ckingDog


    • Could you STOP BEING BLACK? Because lookit what you did to Billmatic, being all PUBLICLY blackety-blackmationally-BLACK.

      • I'm toning it down as hard as I can!!

        • Steverino247

          Oh, they're just looking at your crotch and dreaming. Relax, Chet.

        • That's not an off-colour remark, is it?

  • Gopherit

    When will the browns take their yoke off the white people?

    • Yolk. We wuz throwing eggz.

      • Fare la Volpe

        I hear if you let a brown into your neighborhood they can lay an entire clutch of eggs within 48 hours. 24 if there's a Bollywood marathon on TV.

        • I would like some of these Brown eggs with my sausage.

      • BigSkullF*ckingDog

        Troll. I'm shunning the TROLL. Not you Mittborg. Above you.

        • I think gopherit is a long-time commenter who was here long before me. S/he and I had a little argument once, and I accused him/her of trying to destroy this Wonket community, but I think it was just a moment of anger. It's always better to talk to people you have issues with, don'tyouthink? So far, he's just visiting and commenting, not being hostile.

          • Gopherit

            Thanks, Mitt. I have found new religion through our Editrix, and now only come here to snark. And if "BigskullF*ckingDog" wants to take it up with Rebecca, fire away.

            And really, that's your best snark?

          • Hey Gopherit, I owe you an apology anyway for some of the things I said in a heated moment. Good to see the old crowd dropping by.

            I'll work on the snark. I don't always bring my best.

          • Gopherit

            I didn't mean you, Mitt. I apologize as well. If I had known just how big a freak owls had been before I spouted off, I would have stayed the hell out of it.

          • No probs, dude. The whole Owls thing made me very sad. He was such a witty, funny, valued commenter, and then *bang.* I'm just glad you and Extem and the others are OK.

    • At the end of training camp, if they're good enough to make the team.

  • SoBeach

    Next up: B'nai B'rith are the real anti-semites.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      Next thing you know, it'll be the Klan that's racist! Waitaminnit…

  • Callyson’s founder and treasurer is Stephen Marks, a well-known Republican opposition researcher whose 2008 book Confessions of a Political Hitman detailed his work in what he called “the dark side of politics.” In 2000, he launched an attack ad under the misleading name “Americans Against Hate,” attempting to tie Al Gore to controversial comments by Rev. Al Sharpton. Another Marks spot in 2004 attempted to link John Kerry to convicted murderer Willie Horton. He was forced to retract a claim in the book about then-Rep. John Shadegg (R-AZ), acknowledging that “the information was not accurate.”

    Al Gore and Al Sharpton…but of course they're connected! They have the same first name!

    Kerry and Horton…hey, they're both from Massachusetts!

    Yeah, I trust this guy to bring us to racial transcendence…


    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      Professional moran. Republicans pay him to spew this shit.

  • anniegetyerfun

    Did Henry Louis Gates really pull a "yo mama" on that cop? Because that would renew my respect for him.

  • sharethegrief

    Those voter I.D. laws are totally racist towards the white folk.

    • Just today they're trying to spin those laws as actually PROTECTING cullud peeps' votes. Srsly.

      • HistoriCat

        Disingenuous, lying fuckwads.

  • edgydrifter

    Well, somebody owes the KKK an apology.

  • And how about that Gabby Douglas, racistly winning a gold medal with her racist self?!

    • finallyhappy

      and how about her last name- the anagram for USA Gold!!!!!

      • And shamelessly stealing her last name from the totally anti-discrimination "Susan B. Anthony and Frederick Douglass Prenatal Nondiscrimination Act of 2011!!"

      • Yeah, that is nice, innit?

    • not that Dewey

      Do yourself a favor and don't read the comments on this Breitbart article.

      Lots of references to "Chewbacca" and "Obozo's daughter" and "I hope she pays taxes on that gold medal". Lovely stuff.

      • I had to go look, of course.

        I'm sickened by these people. Is there anything inside them other than a demented level of hatred? When people asked me why I was mad about G.W., I would list all the things about his policies that I *hated.* I didn't like him, personally, but had no real reason not to, since I never met him and don't know him personally. Based on his looks alone, I'd guess that I'd probably dislike him if I met him, just because he has that back-slapping false bonhomie that I detest.

        These fuckers, it's all about "Look at the blackity black welfare ho knee grows eating lunch on MY dime." That's it. They're sickening.

        • finallyhappy

          see, I don't do that anymore because I must respond. I usually say something like" this is racism and bigotry should not be tolerated in our country. You claim to be "real Americans" but you post stuff like this" then I get a vile response- usually badly spelled so I have to respond with "Fuck you, you toothless obese moron". sinking to their level makes my blood pressure go up.

          • not that Dewey

            Several of them were trying to play on the "you didn't build this" theme. I couldn't resist, and I responded "that's funny — that's exactly what Romney said about the 2002 Olympics", with a link to the video of him saying it. I'm waiting to go check the replies, until I have a tall bottle of sedatives next to me.

          • Make it two bottles. These fuckers are enough to give you a myocardial infarct.

          • viennawoods13

            I didn't even notice the name, would have recognized it, but gave the comment a like anyway.

          • Me too, hon, me too. Sometimes I even do it in public and get people threatening to rearrange my face and stuff. Fuck me, I just can't stand this kind of shit. But then I come here and there's good people like you who remind me that I'm not the only one in the world and it really IS normal to be outraged.

        • miss_grundy

          But these people also call themselves Christians, which could cause your head to start spinning a la "The Exorcist". That, for me, is the kicker.

          • I worked with one of those. She was always wanting me to get on my knees and pray with her. I don't think I've ever prayed on my knees, not since I left Catholic school half a century ago, with its obligatory chapel attendance.

      • SorosBot

        And yet, these are the same commenters who got very angry whenever anyone suggested they might just be a little bit racist.

        Remember their many troll invasions? Good times, good times.

        • not that Dewey

          Sure, just like raging drunks get angry whenever somebody mentions that they might be just a little bit drunk. Have any addiction specialists every looked into racism? I wouldn't be surprised to find that there is a neurotransmitter connection to abject racism.

        • finallyhappy

          If I see one more post somewhere about how if we think we are so tolerant how come we don't respect their beliefs? Because tolerance to these morons means letting people call the President any dishonest racist thing and agreeing that it is acceptable to say that. Hating gay people is acceptable and if you don't agree it is a valid equivalent opinion- you are the bigot. Someday,I am turning off the whole internet- for everyone!!

          • not that Dewey


    • This is what happens when you let the knee-growz run loose. They go pick up MEDALS and SHAME you some MORE.

  • Ladies and gentlemen, I give you President Romney's press secretary!

    • I'm gonna be real upset if you end up being right. REAL upset.

      • not that Dewey

        If you need to relax, just picture Ann Romney's shoulder nipple.

        • AAARRRRGH!! I'm being persecuted by a fucking NIPPLE!

  • MissTaken

    Just today I had to stand behind a black person in line at the ATM. When will this injustice for whites end??

    • widestanceromance

      Lucky you, imagine if you had been in front of them. You'd probably be dead and your account wiped clean.

    • anniegetyerfun

      I feel your pain. I have to report to a black person. Just because she has a PhD in psychology and understands the intricacies of how people interact with technology – I mean, I graduated from HIGH SCHOOL once, but I have to answer to HER.

      • BoatOfVelociraptors

        Ux engineer?

    • Steverino247

      They don't have "Whites Only" ATM's in San Francisco?

      • We tried to get one, but the city pointed out that the majority of its residents were some kinda goddamned ethnic or the other, and then they'd all be wanting one too.

    • BigSkullF*ckingDog

      You have money to get out of an ATM? Fucking elitist.

  • Abridgement to nowhere.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      Abridgement Too Far

  • You know what I hate about the NBA?! It's full of racists!! You're lucky to find even one non-racist on most teams, and usually it's a guy from Europe! Thanks for taking a bold stand against this kind of racism, Dirk Nowitzki and Paul Gasol!

    • MonkeyMotion

      And don't even get me started on the complete and total racism of Soul Train…

      • Goonemeritus

        Don Cornelius Libel!!!!

        There actually were a lot of white acts and dancers on Soul Train, I miss it.

        • Some racist took over my spell-check and typed "Paul Gasol" instead of "Pau Gasol" above. I regret the racism.

    • Chet Kincaid doesn't care about Spanish people!

  • YouBetcha

    Sorry your dick's so small, dude. I hear they have pills for that now.

    • Fare la Volpe

      There's also an operation where they stick a pipe cleaner in your wiener tube. I asked for cookie monster blue fuzz.

      • Ouch!!

      • I think that's the braces, dude. You've got the dick mixed up with the teeth.

        Hey, it can happen to anybody.

      • BigSkullF*ckingDog

        I read this and I can't stop laughing. Thank you. And you should prolly take that out before you get an infection.

    • Steverino247

      The pills just make them hard. They don't make them any bigger.

  • RadioBowels

    I'd better go out and buy some more guns and ammo.

  • LetUsBray

    "telling a white officer he wouldn’t speak to him but would speak to his mama."

    I was going to ask where that represents breaking & entering, disturbing the peace, or any other infraction. But then I remembered Dr. Gates' melanin content, so QED.

    • emmelemm

      I believe the preferred idiom is "QED, bitches!"

    • Not to mention this sounds like something grounded in being a professor, much more than racism.
      I'd say it at work to some of the twenty-three year olds I work with, if I wasn't an elderly black man.

      (for the record, I'm not an elderly black man. I'm three elderly black women, living in a middle-aged, gay white guy's body.)

      • Well, you *could* introduce us to these three women, you know.

  • JustPixelz

    Looks like Mitt Romney's long search for a running mate may be over. Let's see what thinks.

    acceptable to the base? YES
    can quote out of context? YES
    smarter than Sarah Palin? YES

  • anniegetyerfun

    Pointing out racism is racist.

    • RACIST!

      • Misty Malarky

        Reverse Racist!

        • BoatOfVelociraptors

          Switch reverse racist mctwist with a method grab!

  • Estproph

    Obama is the racist, of course. Only blacks can be racist, and all blacks are racist. It's proof of their inferiority.

  • Sounds like somebody needs to be spray-painted black and dropped off in a nice section of town before he opens his dumbass mouth again about what racism is.

    • I b'leev I have just come up with a new and exciting method of reversing racism. Thank you.

    • HistoriCat

      Where's Rod Serling when you need him?

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      Don't forget the hoodie. (Skittles optional.)

  • Schmannnity

    Yeah, and I have to walk on a sidewalk without nonwhites stepping off as I approach. How long must my suffering go on, how long must I wander in this nonwhite wilderness?

    • Butch_Wagstaff

      I know I'm being oppressed because when I get in line at a supermarket and there's a brown person in front of me, the cashier ALWAYS scans their items first. I am outraged and disappointed as to what has happened to this country!

  • RadioBowels

    Which half of Obama is racist?

    • zippy_w_pinhead

      all of them, Katie

    • Both of them, Katie! He manages to be bigoted against everyone!

    • arihaya

      the Lower Half !!!

      it is RACIST against White people with small dick !! Racist I said.

  • fawkedifiknow

    More proof – as if any is needed – that at their core, racists are not as inherently evil as they are fucking stupid.

    • Nothingisamiss

      Can they be both?

  • sbj1964

    I have always considered myself a black man trapped in a white mans body.I love fried chicken,big cars,jazz,and I date a lot of white women.Case closed.

    • Dudleydidwrong

      Well, then there is the schwanzstucker test. That's the last word on the subject.

      • sbj1964

        In the words of Madellin Khan from Blazing Saddles "It's True,It's TRUE !"

        • Steverino247

          It's Twue, it's TWUE!

          Or so the closed captioning tells me.

          • doloras

            In a line cut from the final version, Bart replies: "Baby, you're sucking on my ARM."

          • I'm sorry they cut it!

  • I need to start drinking early I guess. That vid made absolutely no sense. Mayhaps if I get my honkie self totally hammered the light of understanding will turn on?


    / and Mrs. weejee would make me sleep outside, also too

    • emmelemm

      But the weather report calls for actual warm temps, so sleeping outside wouldn't be so bad, weej-man! Think about it.

      • BoatOfVelociraptors

        It's hard to wear your Seattle blacks in this kind of weather.
        Sleeves up, collar out,
        That's the way way we like to flout!
        Our gothies! Our techies!

      • When you've been married to someone a long time, and you love them, it's *really* difficult to sleep without them. Five bux says weejee sleeps inside.

    • It's a tough decision, weej.

      Understand the maroons? Or cuddle up with the lovesome Mrs. weejee? Write us from the tent on the front lawn and let us know what you decided.

  • SorosBot

    Yeah, no, recognizing that some white people are racist is not actually itself racist, moran.

    • Fare la Volpe

      You're intolerant of our intolerance!

      • Butch_Wagstaff

        All this PC tolerance talk has only led to one thing: Intolerance of the alleged-tolerant against those who actually have tolerance by showing how intolerant they are in displays of true tolerance.*

        *this comment courtesy or GOPSpeak

        • *boom*
          See what you did?

          Happy now?

          (reassembles head fragments, tries gluing them together)

  • We white people must ban together and fight the power!

    By any means necessary! This is the only way we can achieve or freedom from the Black Man's persecution.

    • DahBoner

      Yeah, maybe someone should start an association to help White People get ahead….

      • Butch_Wagstaff

        Funny how the acronym could be pronounced much like "nope".

    • Swampgas_Man

      When Obama wins in November, I fully expect a lot of "The ballot or the bullet" letters to the editor.

  • mavenmaven

    They've "injected race" by being born black, which was clearly meant as a provocation by the same racists who planted his birth announcements in Hawaii, etc.

    • I keep telling all mah cullud peeps that. Just don't be BLACK dammit. You KNOW it irritates the white folks. DO something about it.

  • BeefHardcake

    2008 campaign slogan: "Yes, we can!"

    2012 campaign slogan: "Suck it, crackers."

    You heard it here first.

    • Fare la Volpe

      Speaking as the whitest person here, I fully support this change.

      • BigSkullF*ckingDog

        Do we have to have a white off?

        • not that Dewey

          That depends. How many Smiths records do you own?

    • I feel compelled to vote for Obama, as long as he promises not to move into my neighborhood.

      • finallyhappy

        I live in his- – down one very long street(yes, I live some few blocks from the other end of 16th street)

  • anniegetyerfun

    I just want to let all of Wonkette know that I adore all of you. So much.

    • I hope you know that the adoration is pretty damn mutual. (Leers at the very_preggers annie)

      • anniegetyerfun

        Aw, thanks! I knew these giant knockers would be good for something!

        • All those smarts AND giant knockers? (Leers even more meaningfully)

    • Concurrence. Thanks for helping me dance the line between despair and hilarity, Wonkland!

      • (Hugs Chet) Wonketz often keeps me from landing myself in the hoosegow anaconda uncontrollable urges to remove the mouthbreathers' heads from their necks.

  • Okay, if it gets the President off the hook (so, apparently he can email me several times a day about fundraising: ahem), I'll admit it: I am the Real Racist.
    I have been the Real Racist for twenty-two years. The guy who was the Real Racist before me had to quit, because he developed an allergy to the costume.
    For what it's worth, I haven't put much effort into being the Real Racist for the last four years or so, because it seems like a large, noisy chunk of the population already has it covered.
    At one time it was kind of a sweet deal being the Real Racist; free chicken sandwiches at certain fast food establishments, parade rides in late-model convertibles, face-painting kids with coded Racist messages at NASCAR events.
    But like anything, the novelty wears off. Anyhoo, the notion of our president being the Real Racist is ridiculous. They'd never let him ride in a convertible, let alone attend NASCAR.
    I don't know where some people get this stuff.

    • HistoriCat

      Do you have something like the Bat Signal? Maybe a noose or burning cross … that would be catchy.

  • despite receiving nearly half the white vote to win the presidency…

    dude. it's the OTHER half of the white vote that's the problem.

  • Stand Up Against Racism! In the brave tradition of Jan Brewer, put on a Novelty White Foam Crone-Finger and shake it at Air Force One whenever Obama makes a campaign stop in your town!!

  • I'll bet Marks thinks black people volunteered to become slaves just to get a free boat ride to the colonies. (Those cunning devils!)

    British commentator Peter York: "Everywhere has a class system. But it's our obsession in the sense that race is the American obsession."

    • I swear if I hear one more cracker ignoramus mouthbreather opine as to how lucky the slaves were to escape Africa for America, I will fucking deck 'em, and y'all will find out my true identity as well as the extent of my gimpiness, because it will be in the papers. Wut? For ten minutes at least. A person can hope.

      • Butch_Wagstaff

        I actually overheard this once at a restaurant (by "overheard", I mean I was eavesdropping so that's why you don't want to sit near me in public because I like doing that shit): "Good thing we brought the blacks here as slaves because their descendants have it better than the all those in Africa today. The whole place is a shit hole."
        I've paraphrased most of it but the shit hole line is verbatim.

        • doloras

          Hmmm. Systematically depopulating entire advanced civilisations and exporting them as slaves MAY have had something to do with en-shithole-izing large parts of West and Central Africa.

        • I was going to say something all ragey and stabby, but doloras said something much more effective and much nicer, so I will start breathing again now.

          I pray this never happens to me because I will wring that fucker's neck, I really will.

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        Ten minutes? I thought you were entitled to fifteen!
        Man, this economy really sucks…

        • So, Biely, I need an agent/lawyer for if/when I ever achieve any of that well-deserved fame, and everything.

          I was thinking you would be the perfect candidate, because, really, who's gonna argue with YOU? So, do you represent mortals? And is it the usual fee? Crossroads at midnight? What?

          • Biel_ze_Bubba

            So long as you don't mind our strict adherence to what actually went down — and a jaundiced view of that pointless swearing-on-the-bible routine. The very best pitchforks are forged from cold hard facts, and we use nothing but the best.

  • Antispandex

    Geeze, for a second there I thought you meant Romney-Marx, and I was like all, that's crazy. Marx is dead. It was in the papers and everything.

    • Misty Malarky

      Romney Marx – even less known than Gummo.

  • BoatOfVelociraptors

    So it's racist to "stand your ground" in your own home and complain about it with words (and votes), but when you chase someone down and kill them, well that's the kind of America that we need.

  • BZ1

    Americans Against Hate was another Marks project, again, with no self-awareness at all.

  • I don't know how much more of this I can take. And to think I was the optimistic one who didn't grow up under Jim Crow, optimistic about America, in all those family conversations with older relatives in the '80s and '90s.

    • Steverino247

      Sounds like my younger son trying to tell me the Army has changed. "Bullshit. The Army hasn't changed since the Romans. We just have better missile weapons. Eventually, you still have to get in close and stick somebody."

  • Gleem McShineys

    We've gone through Karl Rove's looking glass.

  • We need a president from a middle American, Kansas family!

    • Yeah. Like that guy with the funny name, O'Hara? O'Mara? The one in the WH now.

    • emmelemm

      So, not Romney, then?

    • DahBoner

      We need a president from a middle American, Kansas family

      Fuck, yeah!

      Someone who started from humble beginnings and got to where they are now by merit…but where would we find such a candidate???

  • Hate Henry Louis Gates for riding around Martha's Vineyard on a giant tricycle, not for the color of his skin!!

    • emmelemm

      OK, now I'm just fascinated by the albino children blog.

      (as a person who has very, very pale skin – but is definitely not an actual albino)

      • Heh, first thing I found when google-imaging "Gates" and "tricycle."

  • barto

    And here we have yet another groundbreaking documentary on how whites are being oppressed by blacks. Good work, WeAreTHEVictims-PAC, you'll most likely get the nod at Cannes or Toronto film fest.

  • Lazy Media

    Jesus Christ, white men. Could you just relax your sphincters for one second and enjoy the awesomeness that is white male privilege? Seriously, I'm a white guy who enjoys hanging out in mostly black events like pickup basketball and African-American festivals and whatnot, and black people treat you like a fucking KING if you're obviously non-racist, like you accomplished something. I'm just bummed I didn't go to Morehouse when I had the chance.

    • Dude, you could've been the white mascot of your dorm floor at Morehouse, and you passed it up!?

  • DahBoner

    despite receiving nearly half the white vote to win the presidency

    They voted for the White half of Obama, and you know what tricky devils those White people can be!!

  • Barrelhse

    The saddest thing of all is when this idiot rakes in a small fortune via his asshole PAC.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      Meh … it's a very small fortune. Racist douchenozzles like this are just parasites on the reanimated corpse of Nixon's "southern strategy". They'll die when the host does.

  • It isn't just the President who is the Real Racist© but all non-white elected officials since they wouldn't have run for office in the first place if they understood how lucky they were to be Black, Hispanic, etc. etc. while living in Amerikkka.

  • ttommyunger

    Hard to imagine how a God-Fearing, white Christian can make in the face of all this discrimination in 'Merika today. Such a shame!

  • In Wingnut Union, black man bigots YOU!

  • vipond

    As the fella at "Yo, Is This Racist?" says, "Here’s a tip: whenever someone tries to tell you who “the real racists” are, it is always them."

  • dopper0189

    I'm still confused black panthers outside a 99% BLACK precinct polling site intimidates who again???

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