beasts of the field

Iowa Rep. Steve King Loves Dog-Fighting So Much, Wants To Marry It, Have Its Slashed-Up Puppies

Do those look like the eyes of a psycho? Don't answer thatYou know how it’s awesome to be cruel to animals? And how it is not at all worrisome when adolescents or teenage boys get all horny torturing cute things, and it in no way portends (probably both causally and effectively, as they become desensitized to the pain of others) that they will become mass murderers? That is because it says right in the Bible we have dominion over the beasts and the frogs or whatever, so that means we should punch kittens in the face and strap razors to chickens’ claws and then watch as they murder each other! Well, Iowa Congressman Steve King is in full agreement, and would like to take some of the burden off fine citizens whose only crime is keeping dogs in a crate and mistreating them until they’ve become disassociative and then turning them on each other, to the death. What does the esteemed member have to say? Oh, just this:

When the legislation that passed in the farm bill that says that it’s a federal crime to watch animals fight or to induce someone else to watch an animal fight but it’s not a federal crime to induce somebody to watch people fighting, there’s something wrong with the priorities of people that think like that.

Yes, it’s people who outlaw dog-fighting, or want to make it a crime to take kids to see dogfighting, whose priorities are out of wack, yes indeedy! And not, say, Steve King, whose greatest hits include trying to stop the feds from cracking down on cockfighting and dogfighting, in addition to about a hundred other votes where he basically slaps animals in the face with his dick (with a razor strapped to it), because the Bible and Michael Vick told him to.


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Rebecca is the editor and publisher of Wonkette. She is the author of Commie Girl in the O.C., a collection of her OC Weekly columns, and the former editor of LA CityBeat. Go visit her Commie Girl Collective, and follow her on the Twitter!

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  1. Come here a minute

    Steve King opposes Mitt Romney because putting using a crate is too humane a method to transport a dog on top of a car.

    1. Willardbot9000_V2.5

      True…he wants to add an adendum to that: the crate must also contain needles and spikes for when the terrfied dog struggles as Mittens and his gaggle of Flanders children cruise down the highway in the family truckster. Steve King also likes to purchase kittens from the Humane Society and stuff M-80's inside their buttocks…that is all.

  2. actor212

    When the legislation that passed in the farm bill that says that it’s a federal crime to watch animals fight or to induce someone else to watch an animal fight but it’s not a federal crime to induce somebody to watch people fighting, there’s something wrong with the priorities of people that think like that.

    He's right, you know, which is why we should outlaw boxing, MMA, and wrestling, too.

    But not bum fighting.

      1. actor212

        I like the Olympic boxing style: points, headgear, the whole nine yards.

        I've just seen too many boxers stumbling out of gyms at the age of 45 with no prospects for actual work because, you know, they can't remember their own names.


    1. Callyson

      I'll go with outlawing boxing unless it involves Republican members of Congress.

      …oh, I see you already mentioned bum fighting.

    2. HogeyeGrex

      Funny, how Republicans just can't seem to wrap their widdew heads around the concept of consent.

      Explains a lot about how they govern, I suppose.

    3. Willardbot9000_V2.5

      Yes, and for god's sake we need to outlaw female boxing, wrestling and etc., also. That potroast (the dog Steve King skinned alive by running it over with his truck and its razor-sharpened bumpers) isn't going to cook itself! As did Jeebus say alongside whatever other insanities percolate inside Steve King, serial killers skull.

  3. Maman

    I would suggest that we train Steve King up for cock fighting but I suspect it would be better force to feed milk and hobble him instead.

    1. HogeyeGrex

      It depends on whether you think of him as a cockless wonder, or just one giant cock.

    2. miss_grundy

      No, we need to get either the Hound of the Baskervilles or the Hounds of Hell to go over to Stevie King's house and let them "play" with him, so he knows what it feels like to be on the receiving end of the dog fight. Hijo de puta!!!!!!!

  4. sullivanst

    Well, to be fair, Steve King has about the same cognitive ability to give informed consent as a chicken, so in his particular case the comparison may be valid.

        1. widestanceromance

          "She's young [bet not], she's got her [my] taxpayer-paid healthcare, what's she want with a job?"

  5. Barb_

    I remember watching Mike Vick get injured last season while playing for the Eagles and I thought about what he did to his dogs who got injured. It's a good thing that nothing like that happened to him.

    No death and/or injury was wished upon any NFL player in this post. That would be against the rules here.

    1. Callyson

      Now you know how I feel when I watch Roethlisburger get injured, times about 1000…

      …and no death and/or injury wished here either, just a rapid retirement coupled with lots of nightmares about what he did…

    2. Willardbot9000_V2.5

      Well Barb…let's just say I pictured the coach taking Vick outside and beating him with a spiked board until his brains dribbled out and he expired. But I didn't wish any harm upon him, either. By the way…what does it say about the NFL that the only problem the Dogfighter has is whether or not he gets an ample amount of time as a starting QB? He didn't like the Wildcat formation (because it's a cat, see)….poor, poor Michael.

  6. ChernobylSoup

    Dressage should be outlawed but only because it's such an embarrassment to all involved, particularly the horses.

    1. Jus_Wonderin

      I can't speak to horse embarrassment but I had many horse and they have definite personalities. And, they are self aware enough to be focused on pleasing their owner/parent.

      And, maybe the fact that I had horses makes me hate that people race them and some of them have to die in that sport.

      1. Willardbot9000_V2.5

        Yeah…I've made that point before…how can anyone say they like horses and then watch the Triple Crown, etc and enjoy the race? It's a bit like saying you like children but if one of them breaks a leg during kickball you don't see a problem with them being made into glue.

    2. Willardbot9000_V2.5

      Not to mention it's as fucking foppish of a "competition" as exists…why don't they judge competitive sweater knitting, also? When Anne horse loses, it's totally going in a crate on top of the campaign bus.

    3. Negropolis

      I don't know. I feel embarassment for the riders all dressed up as if they are about to meet the Queen.

    1. Charlie_Foxtrot

      Son, ya gots, I say ya gots to let the barnyard animals have their second amendment rights. It just ain't sportin otherwise.

      That boy's as strong as an ox, and just about as smart.

    2. Katydid

      Isn't that what the Republican debates were all about this spring? Remember when Romney tried to wager $10k on one of the pack? Freedom!

    3. Willardbot9000_V2.5

      We do….40 years ago a behavioral scientist wanted to see if he could train baboons to debate and was ridiculed and called mad. Flash forward to present day and who's laughing now as his results are shown by the immense teabagger elections of 2010. Oh and Rand Paul has a really bad toupee. Seriously, when Trump goes to try and carry his moneybags into the sky he needs to become a toupee donor so ex-Senator (by then) Paul can get an upgrade in hairpieces…right now his shit looks like a squirrel vomitting.

  7. Clancy_Pants

    Steve King would like him a good cock fight. Fucking Mensa! It's a bummer that the chickens don't get Oscar de la Hoya type dollars for a fight… If they did maybe it would be legal? Congressman?

  8. CrunchyKnee

    I bet King liked a little man on animal action when he was younger, knowwhatimean?

    Jeebus, these people. But, then again what can you expect from an asshole whose party would gladly let millions of their own citizens starve, for Jesus and tax cuts.

    1. prommie

      According to Kinsey, it was common, and according to the elder McMurtry, Larry, not James (who should be worshipped by all for We Can't Make It Hear Anymore), yup, fucking heifers was just something to do on a bored afternoon in Texas.

        1. Fare la Volpe

          A guy I know out in rural Texas loved to tell a story of one of his grandfathers, a cattle rancher. Apparently during lonely nights on the range, the common practice was ropin' a cow, dragging it over, and having your way with it. One night my friend's grandpa roped a calf and dragged it over to his tent, only for him to realize that it was a young steer. He looked over to his buddies and said, "Shit, boys, it ain't homosexual. It's just friction."

      1. bobbert

        I share the love for James, but the typo (if it was one) in the title makes it sound like science fiction.

  9. bumfug

    Steve King likes cock fighting because at least there he gets to see what a cock looks like.

  10. chascates

    "This is more fun than a hog killin'!"
    -Coffer (Strother Martin) in The Wild Bunch.

    Actually it might be Dub Taylor. I don't mind getting old, I don't mind forgetting things but it chaps me off when I, uh, something, something.

    1. Tundra Grifter

      THAT is a great movie! When William Holden gives that speech about going back for their partner because if they don't they will just be animals.

      As for a lack of memory, remember in Cat Ballou when the old timer comes up to Kid Shalleen at Hole in the Wall and says "Kid! Remember me? I'm old…old…old…" and then walks away? Classic.

      As for m

      1. chascates

        And as Mr. Ballou said of the Kid after a quick drinking session laid him low: "Never seen a man get through a day so fast."

        1. Tundra Grifter

          The gunfight practice scene, were the Kid misses the side of the barn and hits the weather vane.

          Hill Arias.

  11. Texan_Bulldog

    Every time I see this guy I think of the Nazis in all the Indiana Jones movies. Not that I'm calling him a Nazi, because some Nazis were just doing what they were told. Steve manages to think of this shit all on his own.

  12. anniegetyerfun

    With the exception of whenever Mike Tyson chews off an opponent's body part, a boxing match and a dog fight are generally very different events.

  13. elviouslyqueer

    I have no snark for this, other than to note that Steve King is long overdue for a thorough cockpunching.

  14. BaldarTFlagass

    "Shit, next thing ya know, you pantywaist liberals are gonna outlaw dwarf tossing!"

      1. Jus_Wonderin

        WSR, I am sure it is not your intent, but I get a creepy Cold Case vibe from that comment.

        1. widestanceromance

          J_W, here are no more dwarves under my house than there are under anybody's house.

          [hastily packs unmarked van and leaves town]

          1. Charlie_Foxtrot

            "Dwarves under my house" has kind of a creepy Hoarders vibe to it. But if you can pack it into a van instead of accumulating more, you're all good.

  15. Fraudulently_Joe

    When the legislation that passed in the farm bill that says that it’s a federal crime to watch animals fight or to induce someone else to watch an animal fight but it’s not a federal crime to induce somebody to watch people fighting, there’s something wrong with the priorities of people that think like that.

    Now one could argue that human beings, unlike animals, are able to provide -and withdraw- their consent, and that this alone makes certain types of controlled violence within the confines of spectator sports morally acceptable in a way that forcing animals to fight and maim each other is not.

    But, if you're going to hang your hat on animals' inability to provide consent, you're also spoiling the fun of Steve King's other favorite leisuretime activity.

    1. sullivanst

      Didn't he get a passing mention in a Tom Lehrer song intro?

      [I]n agricultural school, … he majored in animal husbandry, until they caught him at it one day.

  16. widestanceromance

    Does he love dogfighting enough to wear Gaga's meat dress to one?

    Seriously, the photo used at TP made me seethe with entirely inappropriate thoughts I dare not put into a comment.

    1. sullivanst

      With votes.

      BTW, what's the betting that in private King refers to his opponent in the upcoming election as "bitch"?

    2. widestanceromance

      And there's a crowd watching, mocking and eating ice cream cones, as they place bets (theoretically).

  17. prommie

    Oh for fuck's sake, she's not just a whinging feminist, she's a vegan-PETA sub-tribe of hair-shirter. Lord Help Us All!

  18. StarsUponThars

    "I guess there's just two kinds of people … my kind of people, and assholes. It's rather obvious which category you fit into." — Connie Marble, Pink Flamingos

  19. Gorillionaire

    Of course it isn't dog fighting that steve zipperhead king loves, it's giant agribusiness. And giant agribusiness gets nervous about these animal protection laws, because they themselves torture thousands of animals constantly all of the time every day all day and night long so that you can have meat glue burgers at the drive thru.

    1. CommieLibunatic

      I swear, people who recoil at the idea of in-vitro meat have never seen a farm or slaughterhouse.

    2. kittensdontlie

      Agribusiness needs more than a good cockpunching, but since corporations are people and I don't wish to be censored, I will only mention tthat we must see those laws get passed.

  20. Jerri

    What. The. Fuck.


    If I was as mean as Rep. King, I'd wish for his balls to be mauled by an angry pack of hungry dogs, but since I'm not a prick totally devoid of compassion, I'll just hope every dog lover in his district sees that. Fucking asshole.

  21. pinkocommi

    If Rep. Steve King wants to commit political suicide, he should next propose legislation easing criminal punishment of pedophiles and terrorists.

    Should go down as well as his dog-torturing legislation.

  22. MissTaken

    Torturing animals – check
    Steve King is only a peed-in bed and a VW away from the serial killer trifecta.

    1. TribecaMike

      If he became a Rasta he could be Snoop Zion Lion.

      (In the eighties, there was a great deejay on Poor People's Radio, The Zion Lion. His catchphrase was "3 o'clock road block!" Killer stuff.)

  23. Dr_Zoidberg

    I can't even snark about this. To hurt something smaller than you, to hurt something indefensible, is beyond reprehensible.

    1. ChernobylSoup

      So you'd be against my plan to televise baby seals fighting to the death over the last vial of flu vaccine?

  24. metamarcisf

    Why aren't we allowing cockfighting in the summer Olympics? It's just as legitimate a sport as crap like water polo and ice boxing.

    1. CommieLibunatic

      You obviously never met any water polo players. I've been told that "if it's under the surface and the referee doesn't see it, it's legal." I'm just surprised that nobody in the Olympic games have been spotted stripping naked and cutting themselves before a game like medieval berserkers.

  25. Billmatic

    I personally favor strapping kitchen knives to bunnies and having them slowly hop towards each other.

  26. Blueb4sinrise

    WTF is that fuzzy dildo trophy thing next to the statue of the guy with his hand down his pants?

  27. deanbooth

    At least one major study alleges that the prevailing mind set among dog fighters is that, the more the dog suffers, the tougher he will become, and the better fighter he will therefore be.

    We see this same mindset in Republican social policy.

  28. DustBowlBlues

    I've no snark on this one. Just a deep seated and complete hatred of anyone insensitive to the suffering of animals. People have a choice to fight or not.

    This is the kind of thing that makes me want to cross the liberal line and buy a big, big gun to use against this kind of person.

  29. SayItWithWookies

    When the legislation that passed in the farm bill that says that it’s a federal crime to watch animals fight or to induce someone else to watch an animal fight but it’s not a federal crime to induce somebody to watch people fighting, there’s something wrong with the priorities of people that think like that.

    You know, a normal person would start with this comparison as a lead-in to why it's inhumane to allow people to do vicious things to each other — it takes a true sociopath to start with this point in order to argue that since we don't stop people from engaging in combat, we shouldn't stop people who — um — force dogs and roosters to brutalize one another.

    Makes me want to live in a place where half the citizens don't think their country's biggest problem is that they're not mean enough.

  30. TribecaMike

    Of course, dog fighting is abhorrent, but I'd pay good money to watch them compete in kite flying contests.

  31. Baconzgood

    A friend of mine worked at an animal shelter he told me that it was the most emotionally taxing job he ever had. He said some of the animals were so abused and injured the only humane thing to do was to put them down. He told me that everyone there dreaded Wednesdays. Wednesdays is when the staff drew straws to see who would do the "injections" for the next 7 days. Lee was no wuss. He was a real manly man, mt. climbing, horse backing, football etc. At one point the stress of the job affected his physical health. And to hear this cock sucker say this….

    (This comment is 100% snark free)

    1. Jus_Wonderin

      I think the upside is that there will be a bunch of dog's to meet your friend (on the other side) and they will forgive him.

    2. CommieLibunatic

      My upvote was not like a Facebook "Like," but more like a sober nod of sorrow. Just sayin'.

      On a related note, I wonder what kind of icon a Sober Nod button on FB would have.

      1. Baconzgood

        I know when I put "(this comment is 100% snark free)" that all fists are not a pat on the back but a tear.

    3. DemmeFatale

      2 of my 3 dogs are rescues.
      They are alive because of people like your friend.
      Brave, selfless, and compassionate shelter workers and volunteers save lives all the time.
      Thank goodness for them.

  32. Blunderthing

    Shee-it. Nex thang ya know it will be a crime to be stupid, hateful and mean. And kill people because you are in fear. I am afraid for this country but not in the way you imagine.

  33. Chichikovovich

    it’s a federal crime to watch animals fight or to induce someone else to watch an animal fight but it’s not a federal crime to induce somebody to watch people fighting, there’s something wrong with the priorities of people that think like that.

    If there were an underground network in which people were forced against their will to fight other people to the death, I imagine that there would be cries to make it illegal to solicit viewers for *that* too.

  34. Chet Kincaid

    I guess we shouldn't be surprised, since Steve King and his ilk think only slightly better of human beings. We know for a fact that they don't give a shit about people murdering each other, so long as it's kept out of the suburbs.

  35. Rotundo_

    Hog shit wrapped in skin in a suit with a bible in one hand and his hand reaching out for graft in the other, Steve truly is emblemic of the modern republican party. We are screwed.

  36. Katydid

    la la la la i'm thinking of puppies and kittens frolicking on the beach, i didn't just read this, la la la la…<seriously, thinking about this shit makes it hard to get out of bed in the morning….where'd i leave those drugs?>

  37. valthemus

    My latest theory: "Steve King" is really Doktor Zoom in disguise, going around making idiot statements to make Republicans look like twit-nuggets. Well, the jokes on you! Iowans love it when their representatives act like d-bags! So HA!!

  38. DustBowlBlues

    I've taken dumped dogs to my vet to have them put down, when the ill was full. I feed them a big meal of canned dog food, pet them and coo to them and give them the only love they've likely ever known. Then I have them killed. And all because of motherfuckers like this. My loathing reaches epic, biblical, violent proportions.

  39. Guppy

    Michael Vick is in a line of work with a markedly high risk for permanent injuries, particularly brain injuries. What about Steve King?

  40. Barrelhse

    Steve- come here and give Karla, the 110lb.Rottweiler, a big old kiss on the lips.
    She'll rip that useless face right off your head. Jerk.

  41. GlowneyHouse

    Well, at least I'm pretty sure Sen. Lindsey Graham is against cock fighting. Cock wrestling though, I'm not too sure about.

  42. labman57

    It's nice to see that King has a cause to champion. I guess ARP and SPCA were too mundane for his tastes.

  43. MosesInvests

    I was at the pound today, looking for a dog to adopt. There were dozens of pit bulls there-dumped because they're too scary-looking. Because of sociopathic SOBs like King who think dogfighting is cool. F-ing broke my heart. This comment is 100% snark-free.

  44. Negropolis

    It's crazy the few people left in the nation that don't know the difference between consensual fighting and fighting between creatures that can't consent one way or the other to said fighting.

  45. wolvenwood13

    Steve King's comments make me angry, very angry. I sincerely hope that idiots like him have to face a slow death by castration with a dull fork – and that's just for starters.

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