Mitt Romney, Homewrecker, Is 'Other Man' In 300-Pound Fellow's Facebook-Love-Triangle Rage

FACEBOOK. And MITT ROMNEY. There they go again, putting people in JAIL. And all because the nice young man to the left did not like seeing tall, dark, and handsome Mitt Romney smiling his suave smile from the young man's girlfriend's Facebook page. So he smashed her computer into the wall and punched her in the face. As one does when one's girlfriend is mooning over a mysterious stranger (MITT ROMNEY).

Lowell Turpin, 40, [of Tennessee] “angrily demanded to know who the male was,” reported Anderson County Sheriff’s Department investigators.

Crystal Gray, 38, “replied that it was a picture of Mitt Romney.”

Despite being informed that the man on Gray’s wall was the presumptive Republican presidential candidate (and not some hunky, severely conservative sidepiece), Turpin apparently was not placated.

Indeed not. Because it was probably this picture, don't you think?

RROWR!

[ TheSmokingGun , via Fark]