Fox & Friends cohost and squinty-eyed walking artist’s composite of every date-rape wanted poster ever, Brian Kilmeade, is not very pleased with the tabloids across the pond, and how they have torn the flesh from Mittens Romney’s bones, one by one, even the conservative and Tory ones! They’d better back off, Kilmeade warns, this guy could be president! Yes, we know what respect and deference Fox & Friends pays to the office of the presidency.
For your viewing pleasure, here is Brian Kilmeade getting murdered with a mace or something.
[TPM]
Mittens will be President the moment they deactivate his C3P0 interpersonal skills and give him an upgrade.
His emotion chip fused to his positronic neural net. They'll have to deactivate him.
Does that mean we can beam him out into space?
Mitten's will never be the droid we are looking for.
I'm going to buy a robot vacuum. I'll let you know if it sucks as much as Mitt. Regardless, I'm going to cal it "Callista".
If they turned his belly button into Suri, she would respond with more intelligent answers.
So much for that "special relationship", huh, KILLmeade?
Vultures have a special relationship with carcasses, too.
The humor just jumps right out, doesn't it? It's a wonderful life!!
Why does Fox News hate Rupert Murdoch? After all its Rupie's press that is hardest on Mittens.
Obviously they haven't opened the latest guidance email from Murdoch so they didn't have the talking points right.
Because that's just how impartial FOX really is — see, it exposes this whole Rupert Murdoch empire as a colossal lie. There, another lunatic conspiracy theory disposed of.
The British press better back off — Romney will have his fancy horse trample them!
Nice one, Rupert. Using your media empire on the other side of the Atlantic to denounce the candidate you're just meh about, while providing fodder and grist for the talking heads of your media empire on this side of the Atlantic.
Nevertheless, you miss the point entirely: namely, how will this affect Sarah Palin and her grifting progeny?
She came off good in this one, Romney was "worse than Palin"
"I can see money from my front porch!"
Shit…got me on that one, too? I guess even though Tr!g is still r$tard#d we're still not aloud to remark as such? Dirty pool, wonkette.
Oh and since my first comment was censored here is the short of it. "I'll answer your question by posing another question, is Tr!g still r$tard#d? Is Bristol still easier than beating Dubya in a spelling contest? The answers to those cryptic questions will tell you how Sarah and her grifting progeny are doing"
Fox & Friends your not helping! Expect the call from Mittens saying shut the fuck up!
This tweet was great:
RT @BorowitzReport: Mitt Romney is coming across as an out-of-touch rich person in a country that still has a Queen.
Elton John?
OK, make that TWO queens.
Morning! I like your answer, thanks!
I am somewhat surprised, that after years of being consistently dull and completely unfunny, Borowitz actually came up with something amusing. Blind squirrel, meet acorn.
This is a win-win situation. If Obama wins, we get 4 more of Obama. If Willard wins, we get 4 years of free comedy!!
True…Mitt has somehow looked more like the Monopoly guy in the country from whence the concept of the Dickensian nightmare was based. The only thing missing is for Mittens to pull a 'Christian conservative' by going over to Germany and purchasing priceless works of 'found' art from the hard right ala how Bob Jones II came across his collection. Just saying but I think ole BJU probably bars any Israeli from coming within 20 miles of that particular collection.
You Wonketteers better be nice to me; I might (probably will) be King of the Internet some day.
I'll see your "King" and raise you my "God"
"God" is soooo overrated.
"D-O-G", however…
Oh great — a golden retriever. And I was so hoping it would turn out to be a saluki.
saluki
That's nothing. Wait'll the pastafarians learn the truth.. instead of a spaghetti monster in the sky, all along it was souvlaki.
Oh, you and your Endian ways.
Sorry Cher, but you'll have to fight DrunkIrishman for that title.
Brian, you're a wanker. And I don't mean that in a good way.
Brian Kilmeade fights like the six year old girl he is.
He could start his own lemonade stand! With no help from ANYONE!!
As a six year old girl I take offense at that comment.
any 6 year old girl would fight much harder
This guy could be President; but he seems to be doing everything in his power to insure that will never happen.
This guy could be President in the same way I could marry Michelle Obama.
In fact, they'd probably happen around the same time and for the same reasons.
Think "zombie apocalypse".
Wait! I want to marry Michelle Obama too. Maybe if Mittens is POTUS he'll legalize polygamy.
Now that's finding a silver lining in a cloud of shitstorm! Of course I'd share! It would be bigamy?
Yeah that would be mighty big o' you. What?
Making this the first day in a while that I have not wished for a pre – lunch Happy Hour.
Ensure! It's a varb Goldangit!! Ensure is pre-hoc, whilst insure is both pre and post hoc.
WMD = Willard's Mouth of Destruction
You know what scary fact I learned this week?
Steve Doocy squeezed out another Dookie. Peter Doocy.
Yeah, and he's super gay to boot!
You'd think he'd be better groomed.
"They better back off. This guy could be President."
And then what? He'd hold them down and cut their hair?
To be fair — that is a scary proposition.
Yay, another Country for the drooling window lickers to hate!
It's almost as if the British don't want us to elect another know-nothing, silver-foot-in-the-mouth vulture capitalist Republican. How dare they insert themselves into
the business of corporate Americaour elections!"This guy could be president…"
I think those of us on this side of the pond fear that much more than the Brits.
Shouldn't we support the press "going after" Willard over there so we don't have to support them "going after" him here?
"Coming up next: Wiping Your Ass With The Magna Carta and What It Means For Your Weekend–after these messages!"
Feh, the Magna Carta had absolutely nothing to do with the Constimatution; it sprung, fully-formed, out of the fertile (yet virgin) loins of the Bah-bull.
No, Brian, he couldn't.
47 seconds of "Fox and Friends" equals at least two full days of getting the smell of Massengill original scent out of my computer. Thanks for nothing, Rebecca.
Now hold on. Massengill is useful, where Fox and Friends is not. Stop insulting it.
Thanks a lot. Whenever I think of Massengill I think think of Michele with one L. Yuck.
Not-Steve Doochey would go over to England to defend Twitt Rmoney's honor if only he could find it on a map.
England… Isn't England that big island off the coast from Germany?
No. That island is Danish Land.
You'd think that pissing off David Cameron and Tories, their ideological bedfellows, would be enough to make Republicans realize they're insane but it just strengthens their resolve to annoy everyone on earth.
After all, America is Exceptional – as per Hannity, "The Greatest Country God Gave Man in the History of the World" – and everyone should kiss the rings.
Not annoy — dominate.
These are people who are extremely envious of the former British Empire and really believe that the world needs to be united under the jackboots of a New American Empire's rule, because we (white male Evangelican Christian Republicans) know what's best for them. Don't worry, though, there will still be fair and democratic elections, in the same way that Putin lets people pretend to run against him in Russia.
i think the republican party stopped being ideological bedfellows with the tories in like 1964.
they're more like the national front.
I always thought Reagan and Thatcher were besties.
Must See REALITY TV: 10 News Corporation anchors and editors from around the world, one 20 foot deep pit and 30 hungry crocodiles.
Pay-per-view gold.
Mittypoo will always be the President of the Fox and Fiends' hearts.
You get the sense that, on Nov 7, FOX will go into full denial mode and start following the Romney transition team until inauguration, when President Romney will step smartly to the microphone and repeat the words of Chief Justice Roberts to be sworn in as #45…
Then MSNBC will rush in…bless its little liberal heart…and cradle FOX as it sprawls across the bed, and with the doctor and attendants rushing in, FOX will breathlessly whisper, "Whoever you are, I have always depended on the kindness of strangers."
You know, I think there's a word for refusing to accept the outcome of a fair and democratic election… what was it…
Republicanism? Brooks Brothers Riot?
I watched the Faux News blowhards concede in 2008, and it was fucking priceless. It will be even better this year … I might have to buy a TV just for the occassion.
Limey Lamestream Media!
Those Fox guys should slap down the owner of those UK rags. Wait, what?
Brian Kilmeade is the smart one.
Does this suit make me look 'tarded?
I wouldn't tell you anyway.
No, you make you look 'tarded.
Crawl: "Experience is everything. Romney is better at…."
What the FUCK would that be?????????? Romney can't go a day without saying something stupid, can't visit a foreign country without creating an international incident. Seriously if he's elected it probably WILL be the end of the world.
BUT on likability, 60-30 for Obama. Wow. And on a Fox news crawl.
I couldn't believe they let that through. Even they don't like Mittens, do they?
Firing people. Obviously.
Borrowing a boatload of money against somebody else's equity, and pocketing it?
Letting other people run a business, and then claiming to have business experience?
Letting other people handle his money, and then claiming financial acumen?
I have a better shot at being a Calvin Klein underwear model than Mitt has at being POTUS.
This comment demands the obligatory PICS or GTFO.
Picture if you will a bald middle aged engineer just with less clothing and now visualize that picture 40 feet long and pasted on the side of a city bus.
Boxers. Please let it be boxers.
I will withhold fapping until this question is answered to my satisfaction.
To make it a fair fight how about Lindsey Graham versus Elizabeth? Two old queens battling it out for bragging rights.
Elton John to ref? Oops, I mean SIR Elton…
Gwen Ifill was interviewing Elton John and keep calling him 'Sir Elton'. It's like the Seinfeld sketch and 'Maestro'.
I never understood this, why didn't they just PRINCESS him instead….?
Did not watch; can not stomach Fuckhead and Friends, but what really surprises me is that they have notes. And that is the best they can come up with?!
Well, Ailes etc. only had overnight to write/print out the talking points.
Back in '88, I worked in a copy shop. Fax machines were expensive, so we offered fax service for $1/page. One of the people who used our service was a marketing guy who did political consulting. Nearly every day, he would come in and have me fax stuff to Roger Ailes's home office. Dear lord, I wish I still had that number memorized, since you know that thing is still hooked up.
The GOP provides them with printed notes, memos and talking points, free of charge.
And here I thought Fox provided the GOP with with notes, memos, and talking points.
"If Mitt becomes President…"
You know, there were, like, say 3 or 4 dozen people around the world who didn't totally hate us during the reign of King George the W. Mittens and Queen Ann will finish the job.
Were those 3 or 4 dozen people all feeding us false intel on Iraq?
I think Chris Wallace was a touch too subtle for Mr. Kilmeade.
Getting run over by a semi would be too subtle for Brian Kilmeade.
What a snipey little bitch.
Willard Mitt Romney supporters are having a great old time making fun of Boris Johnson's name.
Do they know he is actually an American? Truly, relinquished his citizenship a few years ago.
Er, Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson [no shit] was definitely born here in New York City… but to an Englishman. Stanley Johnson [his father] was an employee of the European Commission and The World Bank — and a former tory Euro MP — born in Cornwall apparently.
But wait, there's more….. on his father's side, Boris is a great-grandson of Ali Kemal Bey, the Interior Minister in the Turkish government of Damat Ferid Pasha, Grand Vizier of the Ottoman Empire.
He's still an elitist creep though.
I know he has a crazy background and his wife is half-Sikh!
http://www.express.co.uk/posts/view/1102/Furious-…
Jesus…. too funny.
Have you seen the names of his kids? I think one is called Peaches and another Lettuce. When those girls grow up, they're gonna disembowel Boris for inflicting them with those names — just as soon as the inheritance comes through.
"The bumbling Henley MP…" is perfect for this clown.
Thx, that clip just made my day and I'm having 60 teenagers over for a band party tonight. I'm breakin' out the bullwhip and greetin' them at the door with an enthusiastic, "Como esta, bitches!".
I hate that movie, but I LOVE that scene!
Back off, because you have no right to have opinions on how Mitt insulted your country.
Every 200 or so tweets at romneyshambles someone attempts a 'but, but, Obama….', they're bailing with a Dixie Cup.
Yeah. Right. Tough guys. Sheee-it.
I must say that watching Commander Hair Helmet practicing his foreign relations skills is as entertaining as waiting for the latest diatribe from the Queen of Wasilla. Everyday he is out of the US he seems to offer even more gaffes. As someone else said, he's the American Borat.
Wait until the Brit's find out what Mormons think of Harry Potter.The Mormons are filing charges of copy right infringement.
Brigham Young was the original Dumbledore, and even gayer. Hence the need for so many beards, er, wives.
http://madmikesamerica.com/wp-content/uploads/201…
Brian Kilmeade is here to defend Mitt's honor.
Which is more than Mitt ever did.
We bail them out of two wars and they return the favor by mocking one of our most precious and greatest job-creators
This is an outrage!
We need a modern-day Boston Tea Party in Utah. Down with British-made magic panties! Throw 'em in the Great Salt Lake! (hint: take 'em off first)
To be fair the bankers blew him and gave him $2 mil.
Hey guys, for those of you that miss Gretchen, here's an upskirt update.
From like six years ago?
Is she dead?
She's dead down there.
Watch yourself UK – Brian Kilmeade is as mad as an ineffectual little candy-ass can be.
" I swear, sometimes I think some Americans shouldn't leave the country. Are you kidding me, stay home if you don't know what to say." — Carl Lewis on Mitt Romney
Of course Carl Lewis would say that…he's a blah!
I never, ever thought that the Republicans could manage to find somebody more loathsome than W as a candidate, short of reanimating the foul remains of Nixon… but I was wrong. Boy, was I wrong.
Mitt is Dubya after getting HPV vaccine.
Nixon and J. Edgar Hoover had a baby and brainwashed George Romney into thinking it was his.
Slightly OT (since I couldn't post on Wonkville DAMMIT), but this just in from Ohforfuck'ssakeland.
If I could do the maths, which is hard for a girl, that poll would give me a pretty good idea of the percentage of the stupidest people in this country.
And why do 8% of Democrats think he's Muslim?
I can't post on Wonkville either, no idea why.
Oy brother. Btw, according to polling done earlier this year, 30% of Texans think humans and dinosaurs co-existed, and 29% chose "I don't know."
Kilmeade speaks(?) just like a 4th grade bully who's going to be held back. Again.
haw haw
"Some of my best friends own Fox & Friends"
OT & WGAS: "Como estas , pinches?" is the line I heard at the moment I created my wonktard login . Sorry, too early for Fox n Friends. I need at least two shots of Patron in me before I can tolerate Kilmeade's corniness.
Because it just wouldn't be a Fox & Friends clip without a little misogyny thrown in at the end.
"Does this show make my head look fat?"
You British need to back off, because he could be President someday and he might ask you to follow us to war, and then what are you going to do, huh?
Well, that should get the British tabloids off Mitt's back. Don't wanna mess with Brian Kilmeade.
Sure.
You can almost hear the Aspirin grind in that segment.
Bwhahahahhahhah. The last few seconds of the clip are hysterical.
"If that suit makes you look fat…" because it does and by the way your fucking head looks like an inflated Mylar balloon…bwhahahahahaha
Kilmeade?
But I love mead!
No, kill me…
LOL it does make him look fat too.
fat headed and fat suited.
Wall to wall Fox News coverage of How Romney Stood Up To the British!!! coming up in 3…2…
The Murdoch empire which owns Fox and Friends also now has its top editors in England under indictment. Exactly what should they be watching out for, Brian? You're all the same puppet show.
But what does the wisened sage and political analyst Mindy Meyer think about the 2012 Summer Olympics, England, the country's preparations, and the socio-political implications of the Olympics this year in a post-9/11 world beset by terrorism, recession, lagging economies and housing, food, water and agriculture crises? What would Mindy Meyer do?!!
Mindy Meyer for Prime Minister!!
Surely this line of defense should be encouraged, no? What better way to improve the perception of Mitt's capacity to competently conduct foreign policy than to argue that "Americans don't care what furriners think."
I think I can safely state (without undergoing the pain of watching these clips) that an empty wagon always makes the most noise-or as my grampa used to say: "Rave on cat-shit, you'll be covered!"- whatever that means.
Do these pants make my butt look gay? Or just fuckable?
Here's how the Wikipedia listing starts regarding our potential strong new Commander in Chief.
Willard is a meek social misfit with a strange affinity for rats. He lives in a large mansion, accompanied only by his cranky and decrepit mother.
using romneys words against him…damn those crafty foreigners…it's no wonder mitty hangs in france.
Old truth: UK is extra-special ally that Obama can't understand because he is, you know.
New truth: UK is a pathetic bunch of second-rate socialists who better watch out!
And so on down the memory hole.
All I heard from that clip was "ARGLE BARGLE YURP BAD" then I passed out.
Essentially, Kilmeade is suggesting that Romney would base his foreign policy decisions on personal vendettas and acts of petty vindictiveness.
Thanks for the heads-up.
Typical Fuck Nudes wingnuts. Don't go with will anybody can make a mistake, especially in the international arena, and let it go at that. Oh, no, they have to get all "Just wait you limey bastards, as soon as Mittens is our Preznit, we are going to nuke your fucking asses back to Stonehenge."