George W. Bush was president for eight years, and it was awesome and he was famous he was powerful, but now he lives in a big mansion in… Dallas… eww… and has lots of money and never wants to see or talk about politics again. For the second consecutive time, he will not be attending the Republican National Convention. Since he is America’s most popular president, perhaps even the Second Jesus, it must be a simple matter of scheduling issues. Sucks for him! He’s going to miss some fun (/unfun and predictable) themed strippers in Tampa, the nation’s worst city behind Charlotte, North Carolina.
These strippers will be state of the art, top of the line. For example: one club will feature a stripper resembling Sarah Palin, an idea that strip club owners nationwide thought would be creative within one minute of Palin’s announcement as VP candidate four years ago. Also, these will be fancy science and technology strippers from the future:
One place is bringing in a stripper who looks like former vice presidential candidate Sarah Palin. There are major renovations taking place. And some nude clubs have already been giving potential customers a taste of the talent online.
“Not only can you see the dancers on the stage and in the dressing room, you can also talk to them in an online chat room,” said Don Kleinhans, owner of the 2001 Odyssey on North Dale Mabry Highway.
By the time the RNC begins in late August, Kleinhans hopes out-of-towners will have already formed attachments to his dancers from watching them online through the Club Cam System, which the 2001 Odyssey developed.
So the cutting-edge strip club marketing idea is apparently, “You can just stay at home and jack off to the strippers, on your computer.” This could cannibalize the club’s revenue stream, but hey, we are not MBAs as you had all suspected.
So… uhh… how were we forcing ourselves to tie together these two barely related stories again? George W. Bush will not be able to see the strippers in Tampa but can watch them on the Internet; that’s the ticket.
Now everyone go play outside for a while, it’s the weekend.
{ 252 comments }
Sarah Palin will also be home masturbating, to a George W. Bush lookalike.
A Shrub clearing brush, or a Dubbya on a
stickpole?If Sarah's masturbating, it will be to a hundred dollar bill.
So, her latest batch of Meth is done?
♫☼♪ Bristol Crüe Persuasion ♫♪☼
I find this comment impossible to masturbate to.
Just try harder
I *could* masturbate harder…
OR…
I could masturbate *smarter*…
which would *also* rule out any mention of silly sarah.
what do you think this is, Wankette?
Second straight convention Bush'll be avoiding the hurricane.
On the plus side, all the Tampa-area bars still have time to cut back on their O'Doul's orders.
Just want to interject that since no secret Wonkette cabal came out of the woodwork to squat at my hovel in US America's worst city for the DNC… I will get the head start on Chase bank and move out before those assbags foreclose. If Keith Ellison or any of the other muzlin brotherhoodies want to eat skittles at my hovel, the key is under the mat. Along with the crow bar. Just break the padlock off.
Cheers.
/wunk'd
And some nude clubs have already been giving potential customers a taste of the talent online
Amazing what you can transmit over the Internet these days…
Todd will be there.
Edit: This quote from the stripper story is teh AWESOME:
"Guys I meet online feel like we have a relationship," she said. "If someone came to town, you only had them the short amount of time … and had to part ways. Now you can still make money off them."
– Go Go the stripper
Is she not the perfect little Republican?
""Guys I meet online feel like we have a relationship," she said."
I don't claim to be any kind of expert on the male psyche, but really? Go Go thinks that because some total stranger beats his meat to an online video of her, he "feels like they have a relationship"? Sounds to me like someone had a big heaping bowl of Delusional Flakes for breakfast this morning. I'd be amazed if the guy she's fucking in real life feels like they have a relationship.
You have to understand that she's speaking of the *Republican* definition of relationship, i.e., just because they've been beating the meat to her online, they expect to totally fucking own her ass once they actually get to town. For free.
But she's smart enough to keep milking them for the munniez, which is really all that matters to all the hideous twisted little participants in this pathetic caricature of a human interaction.
But only a time or two…
Third rate romance. Low rent redezvous.
Would that his scheduling conflict placed him in The Hague.
But if he's at least aware in some dim little portion of his booze- and coke-addled brain that no one wants to see him, that's something.
Instead of the "Dance of the Seven Veils" will the strip clubs feature the "Dance of the Seven Sister Wives"?
Magic G-strings!
I think the Magic Undies extend from neck to knees. Kinda hard to make THAT into a thong.
The strippers will be just like the convention: No Bush to be seen.
You are insinuating their masculine qualities, I assume?
It's summer, so it seems reasonable you'd find the Replugz at the drags.
I think he is indicating that W's removed that bush a brazillion times.
His claim to fame is for clearing brush.
Well, that, and being a miserable failure.
I would be disappointed if I saw Bush at a strip club, I don't pay the big bucks for that.
Now, watch this shave!
I like this shave better.
The club’s revenue stream is based entirely on male patrons other stream.
In other words, George's handlers haven't been able to keep him on the wagon lately, and the party leadership can't risk any photos of Pickles and Turdblossom restraining him from "wrasslin" with Mitt.
"any photos of Pickles and Turdblossom restraining him from "wrasslin" with Mitt."
I would pay good money to see that, if I had money.
Also, in keeping with Dumbass' habit of making up a demeaning nickname for everybody, I wonder what Dumbass' demeaning nickname for Mitt is?
Captain Underpants? Mittney? Mormoduke? Dog and Ponies??
"any photos of Pickles and Turdblossom restraining him from "wrasslin" with Mitt."
Or maybe just a backrub.
Who will get the blame for the Category 5 hurricane?
A. Jeebus
B. Global Warming
C. Obama
Duh: Teh gheyz and the librul churches that think teh gheyz and the women on birth control are, you know, people.
I can totally see a cluster of Xtard GOPpers, hanging around the bar at a Tampa strip club and stuffing $5 bills into a dancer's G-string, while they bitch about how gay marriage got their god all pissed off and hurricaney.
D. Hillz, and her aides
I have just realized that I am drinking too early in the afternoon, because I was going to point out that a cat 5 in Tampa would be very, very tricky. But, undoubtedly, C.
Oh God please, please, please….
Trick question, since they don't believe in global warming.
Why you give us such EASY stuff, dude? Ain't you got no shame?
Oh, wait, this IS the Wonketz.
Carry on.
One place is bringing in a stripper who looks like former vice presidential candidate Sarah Palin
Crazy Eyes' response: "Where's *my* look alike?"
Sitting in Katherine Harris' breakfast nook.
Is "breakfast nook" in Urban Dictionary. I am too lazy/drunk/stoned.
No, that's the Jeb bush lookalike.
No, wait — that IS Jeb Bush!
Club owner: "Hey look, we're trying to make a buck here, OK?"
"The last thing I need is 15 schizophrenic schoolmarms taking their clothes off."
Jan Brewer lookalike is what the GO-Pee'ers really want.
Dear gawd. I may never speak to you again.
The real Grand Canyon of Arizona.
C'mon strip club owners, let's stay relevant. There's gotta be some Huma Abedin-lookin' bitches out there!
But Moooooooooom! I don't wanna play outside!
[yes, I realize this post was not written by the BlogMommy]
Ah, but this is modern America. It should go something like this:
"But Mooooooom. I want to play outside!"
"You are going to stay in your room and masturbate young man. Your father works very hard to provide you with that computer and internet. How else will you be prepared to enter the modern workplace!"
The Latona's not that far away.
Is that a hurricane joke?
No hurricanes in Seattle.
Just clouds, rain and cold.
I went from 105 and sunny yesterday on "vacation" to 65 and rainy today in Portland, so I feel your pain.
Metaphysical question for the day: Is it possible to get aroused while within 50 miles of Mitt Romney?
Only if you don't know he's there. (Tree, forest, sound, etc.)
The Rehabilitation of George W. Bush's Image
Step 1: Keep George W. Bush out of sight and away from a microphone.
There is no Step 2.
02 GOTO 01
Step 4: Profit??????
Not sure you can rehabilitate his image. For example, lepers were kept out of sight, and now leprosy is even curable, but still nobody has anything good to say about it, except the occasional sick joke.
Why did the leper go to the gun dealer?
He wanted to buy some arms.
Oh, I love leper jokes almost as much as dead baby jokes!
What did the leper say to the prostitute?
"Keep the tip."
MOAR.
The first rule of George W. Bush Club is that we do not talk about George W. Bush Club.
The only route to rehabbing Dubya is by electing someone so incompetent we look back in nostalgic sadness at the Bush years. Fortunately for Dubya, relief in the form of Mittens may be coming.
I always figured that's how we ended up with Dumbya. G.H.W. couldn't stand the thought of going down as the most useless, incompetent piece of shit ever to disgrace the US Presidency, and Dumbfuck was the only idiot in the known Galaxy who could make his Dad look good.
George H.W.: How 'bout Jeb?
Barbara: No, no. It's gotta be little George.
So, no Bush, no Palin. Will Dick Cheney be there? Or will he only show up if he decides he is going to be vice president again?
Who else would keep down the population of wild children and fetuses?
And 80 year old men?
I think you also have to repeat his name thrice on a moonless night.
Along with spilling the blood of a innocent new born.
With the possible exception of Dick Cheney, newborns are innocent by default.
Unless you're trying to *tell* us something, Lionel.
What about the male strippers? I assume Marcus and Michelle will be attending.
And darling Lindsey.
Little known fact: like Snowbilly herself, her strippelganger will also feature misshapen testicles.
STRIPPELGANGER??!!?
Late on a Friday afternoon, you have coined the word of the week, and it's so awesome I declare it to be the word of next week too.
That is a good one. Reminds me of the Laura Kightlinger joke: "I want to be so famous that there are drag queens dressed up as me."
I love her!! Why did they ever cancel Minor Accomplishments?
Upfist party for 'strippelganger' !!!
Hmmm … not sure that came out how I wanted, but there you go.
I love "strippelganger," and I think it should be in the dictionary.
And it should have its own song cycle.
(I used to be a music teacher and classical singer.)
Die Strippelganger?
Die Ring der Strippelgangen?
Needs moar umlaüt.
Would that be her necklace of mementoes from all the guys she's fucked, or are you referring to her OWN testicles.
Ew, I think I just made myself barf.
And boobies that disappear then come back and then disappear again.
Really? A dancer named Go Go? That's like a prostitute named Whore.
Just a return to the medieval pattern of naming – Baker, Smith, Miller. Oh, and Hooker.
I remember reading somewhere that the medieval trade guilds allowed a widow to take over her late husband's profession. So Baxter was the widow of Baker, Webster was the widow of Weaver, etc. No idea whether that's true or not.
That's like a Cheney named Dick.
She's been through the desert on a whore with no name.
Pleased to make your acquaintance. Name's John.
OT, but spread the word.
Does context matter?
Is there *any* context in which Mittens' remark (in full or the edited version) makes any sense at all?
Didn't think so…
To wingnuts or the people dumb enough to think a politician in America would actual bash business and entrepreneurship without dishonest editing.
Nice delay on that. HTF you do that?
Microsoft Paint and an old picture of Mittens standing in front of a dark background, plus the text of his NAACP speech. Pre-heat oven to 375 degrees and bake for 25 minutes or until golden brown.
Sent it to my daughter, the poli-sci, law school girl. She and her friends love Obama.
(I also sent her your Mitt/HOPE thing.)
Thanks.
Thanks, bmw.
This is the RNC–they need male strippers, duh.
Levi Johnston lookalikes, no doubt.
Hell, Levi probably needs a buck.
Young buck.
Um, yeah… "lookalikes". That's the ticket.
NotThatDood was right. Today you ARE all OWLS.
I like owls.
I suspect there's a lot of owling going on because we might have lost one of the flock.
nah.. they'll just be getting it for free in da toilets.
One place is bringing in a stripper who looks like former vice presidential candidate Sarah Palin. There are major renovations taking place.
To the stripper? Let me guess – reversing plastic surgery to look even older and more beat-up?
The libs will still blame it on Bush.
Strippers don't really have Bush anymore.
Unfortunately, Bush is kinda the herpes of Presidents. Worst at the beginning, but flareups get farther apart as time goes by.
Still no cure.
"Bush is kinda the herpes of Presidents"
I always associate herpes with the Palin tribe. Just when you think you're finally rid of them, one or another of them will crave attention, and we'll have to suffer another outbreak. Oh, yeah, and I also associate herpes with the Palins because they're disease-ridden trailer trash.
May I congratulate you on your flawless reasoning?
Awww, it's a shame that Dubya won't be at the convention to pass the torch to the next generation of elitist, out-of-touch assholes. But maybe if it's enough of a disaster he'll fly over it and look out the window.
Beg to differ. Those guys are intimately in touch with their assholes.
And with each others' assholes (grammar?)…
I'm not trying to belittle your point that these men are "elitist, out-of-touch assholes," but I think someone needs to point out there is no "next generation" here…Romney and Bush are almost exactly the same age and graduated from Harvard Business School the same year.
now he lives in a big mansion in… Dallas
Biggest bunch of crap gathered in a mansion since Grey Gardens.
[imagines Laura reading to W. about Poppy and Mama, Paula and the jar and J.R. Ewing when George is too gone to "clear brush" anymore]
Sitting in his underwear, playing with Saddam's pistol.
Texas sucks balls.
this seems a perfect time to say that today didn't COMPLETELY suck as the olympic torch arrived in london which was pretty cool and done by an afghan vet and was right exactly on the spot where thomas cromwell and anne boleyn and etc. were all beheaded.
i would also like to say that as an antidote to today, i am going to watch 'salmon fishing in yemen' as lasse hallstrom often pleases me and emily blunt nearly always pleases me.
I wish we had a spot in our country to commemorate where people were beheaded. Might keep things in perspective for some.
How 'bout the Arizona desert?
May I suggest "Trout Fishing in America?"
A Brautigan fan?
Yes, I think Revenge of the Lawn is my favorite. Sad when he suicided.
'salmon fishing in yemen'
One of Hemingway's lesser known works?
Did you like your movie? I thought I had seen more of Hallstrom's movies, but I looked & apparently not since 'My Life as a Dog'. Read a good review of the Salmon Fishing, so hope it's a good one.
'My Life as a Dog', top 10 movie for me.
I remember liking it, but haven't seen it since the 80's. Definitely should watch it again.
I'll move it up to the top of my Netflix list.
"Gentlemen put your hands together and give it up for Grifterella on stage two. She enjoys long walks on a snowmobile, intimate dinners with $50,000 donors and getting drilled"
.. and she'll blow which ever way the cash is going.
"One place is bringing in a stripper who looks like former vice presidential candidate Sarah Palin. There are major renovations taking place. ". I can only imagine…..Not every worn-out piece of ass has pussy lips that hang down like a wet Pea-Coat sleeve.
Thanks for the disgusting mental-image dichotomy of strippers dressed like Sarah Palin and worn out female genitals.
Disgusting? Stories of strippers and female genitalia are a fabled and glorious genre' for sure, but disgusting? Why, I have invested untold hours and uncounted Dollars in pursuit of those subjects, as far East as Manhattan and as far West as Manilla, but I have yet to be disgusted. I've seen Labia so massive and talented that they could play Pick-Up Stix, shoot Ping-Pong Balls across a large room and slap a Hockey Puck into a net past two Goalies. I personally know a lady in Atlanta who has delighted patrons for years with her willingness and ability to tie her love-lips in a knot for anyone willing to pay a small fee. I happen to prefer a woman who comes equipped with fender-skirts and have been known to happily place my head between their thighs and pull said appendages up around my face like a gas-mask yodeling for hours and hours, knocking down trees, bushes and flowers. Disgusting? I've been with women whose Twinkie was so rancid and pee-crusted that I could have at it all weekend and still feel grit between my teeth at Command Reveille come Monday Morning. Disgusting? I could give some accounts that would make a Carnival Barker blush if I were so inclined….but I would never do that on the Wonkette, never.
Tommy, I believe that is the longest comment you've placed on teh Wonket. I'm certainly happy to see that you have an enjoyable hobby.
“Had”. (Whimper)Sent from my iPhone
Vaginal Rejuvination Convention Specials $49 after 9pm…
Have van, will travel?
At least watching on TV won't give you a crick in the neck that you get from clubs that have two stages.
"And now, put your hands together for lovely Lisa on the downtown stage . . ."
Love that picture, Wonker Yoda.
George: Looky my seat cushion.
Laura: Why George, it's like the flag of Panama.
Daughter Barbara: It's the advertisement for new car dealerships! Am I getting a new car, Daddy? Let's get drunk.
And Nancy Kissinger: "Please God, don't let any Bush beer barf get on me."
I don't blame Chimpy for not wanting to attend the Republican convention in Tampa. I would not be able to stand it either. The only thing I can think of that would make me want to attend would be to see Pussy Riot perform the Star Spangled Banner in the opening ceremony.
Come on Putin, be a man, free Pussy Riot!
That's just not right, there are still facets of our republic that he has yet to totally fuck up. He's is rested and ready, admit it we all kind of miss him.
Only when we're throwing things, Goon.
What IS it with you LibrulZ & eye/hand coordination?
We haz eet. We usez eet.
Yeah, but Imma get sighted in pretty soon.
Stay home, W. Have another drink and a pretzel.
I'm sure he will be in his Prezidintual Libary "reading."
He'll finally finish "My Pet Goat."
Pat the Bunny.
..Bush ain't no fag.
Mitt Romney would sooner let himself pictured with RuPaul wearing "Obama 2012" t-shirt than being seen palling arround with Bush
you had me at rupaul.
Patty: Every time your brother comes over, he gives everybody a hard time.
Graham: He just acts like that because he's insecure.
Patty: Well, what kind of excuse is that? Everybody's insecure. Who isn't insecure?
Graham [thoughtfully]: RuPaul?
Patty: Yeah, RuPaul seems pretty comfortable with himself.
– "My So-Called Life"
Will Casey Anthony be dancing to celebrate the jury of her peers?
She should work a dead baby doll into her act. Props are fun and the GOP's obsessed with dead babies.
The other dancers would resent being called her peers.
strippers and GUNS. dON'T FORGET THE God damn fucking guns!
Translation: He's gonna lay low until all this "Crimes against humanity" talk blows over.
He's not laying low — he's just too busy telling us how to fix the economy to bother with such petty, partisan bickering as politics. You probably think I'm joking don't you? Check the link and reel in horror.
Hmm. No sir, I do not like it. That book is irksome, if not downright outrageous.
Don't tell me, let me guess — more tax cuts for corporations and the 1%? With cuts to social services, and perhaps just a couple of itsy bitsy wars to resolve those pesky daddy issues?
He didn't want to go to Switzerland anyway
Hey, it's friday! Here's the living fossil cephalopod the nautilus. Only thing living which looks like the ammonites, although apparently not a direct descendent.
thumbs up for isomporphic development!
Today's big fun bird pitcher http://www.flickr.com/photos/30500320@N06/7609684…
bloody pterodactyl
Freaking awesome.
If you still want the picture of the variegated flycatcher, send your email to me and I'll send it to you. I'm jrrzgrrl at hotmail.
Thankyou.
On the way.
Hey, I think I saw this boid earlier today…
With the drought going on here, all the streams and ponds are drying out leaving them a fast food haven for fish eating birds. This was taken yesterday at a smallish lake here in town and I saw at least 8 Great Blue Herons gorging themselves and 3 Belted Kingfishers having an easy time snagging out fish.
So at least there's an upside to the drought, although the fishies may not be very appreciative. Are you in SoCal?
What are the specs on that shot? What lens were you using?
You should post links every time you take a shot. Your work is too beautiful not to share.
That GBH Shot was taken with a Sigma 150-500 mm lens. I got really really close to it. About 15 yards away. He was a youngin and didn't quite know what to make of me. He seemed to be more interested in playing with his new fancy wings than to pay attention to me. I don't want to post many pictures on here, because this really isn't the place for it. Maybe just sneak one on here now and then late at night or on a weekend.
Or you could just post the link every time there's a new shot? That way you won't eat up bandwidth, but those of us Who Luvz Teh Birdeez will get notice!
that's the weirdest thing i've seen in forever.
well except for mitt romney.
Birdbrain libel!
It truly is amazing Noah got TWO of those things on his boat. We've got to get more Jesus into our Fridays.
This is why Clinton had Al Gore invent the internet!
Tampa, in August. What could go wrong?
Kindly bookmark this snark, in case I forget to!
Too bad. Having him in Tampa would have given us so much good footage. Oh, well…
Let's see: the Republican Party won't even return the calls of their last time in power, they're putting forth a candidate the religious right utterly despises, they've alienated everyone who's not a rich white male (except for Allen West), and everyone else in the party will spend the convention battling their way through rabid Ron Paul fetishists so that they can get out and ogle contemptuous strippers dressed like Sarah Palin. Meanwhile, the rest of the country will be getting gay married in peace.
And they say Barack Obama has done nothing.
In the case of Michele Bachman, I think "alienated" refers to the extraterrestrial lunch box they made from her skull.
yeah except romney's poll numbers keep rising.
I went to the strip club's website to watch me some naughty cam, but then I just felt sad for all the Daddy Issues I saw before I could find the video feed. Total boner kill.
Texas, like the other states
Is hot as hell (that's how they meet their mates)
But a Midland gal is hard to beat
When you're sitting in your car seat,
And your wannabe girlfriend is coming right at you at 80 miles an hour
Ca-Roooooooommmmmmm! Bang! Bash! Bam!
Are you talking about Laura Bush and her dead boyfriend?
Actually, I was thinking of a song by Doug Sahm. Cey la vee.
If Bush does show up, hopefully they will have pretzels at the club; or maybe he could go out shooting trapped ducks like a sportsman with Dick Cheney.
It would be almost as awkward for Republicans to find W at the convention as it would be for you to find your mom at the strip club. Or maybe finding your mom at the convention would be nearly as awkward for you as it would be for the GOP if W attended a Tampa strip club. I don't know. I'm almost out of whiskey. What do you people expect?
I remember that video of GeeDub at the Olympics. That fidiot was falling down drunk with seriously gross pit stains.
Say, the Kissingers look like a lot of fun on a date, don't they?
"Honey, vat you say ve get bombed and disappear?"
Olympics, here we come. Yeehaw.
Signed,
the Bush's
Olympics One: Shh! Quiet, he'll hear us!
Olympics Two (peering over hedgerow): Fuck! He's heading this way!
Olympics One: Shit, hide!
Bush's Dick: *wizzzz*
Bush's Zipper: *zzzzzip..snag!
Bush: Owie! Owie! Owie!
Olympics One and Two: Ha ha! HA HA HA!!
Hey guys:
OT, but I was on "vacation" for a week and just got home last night. Are they still trying to overturn Obamacare by voting on it ten times a day instead of doing whatever their jobs are, or have they finally given up on that with the Supreme Court decision and whatnot?
As of now, Romneycare stands.
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WTH?
Owls ain't here, man.
OWLS CAN YOU HEAR ME
"he will not be attending the Republican National Convention"
It's true that he *wanted* to attend, and whined and stamped his feet and cried like a little bitch, but Jeb threatened to kill him in his sleep if he went.
"owner of the 2001 Odyssey on North Dale Mabry Highway"
I get the reference, but hasn't it yet occurred to anyone that 2001 now sounds a bit dated, since we're already in 2012…
Oh, wait… Florida, huh?
Never mind.
The Cayman Islands Olympics are going to kick major ass.
"Kleinhans hopes out-of-towners will have already formed attachments to his dancers from watching them online through the Club Cam System"
Because strip clubs and online sex aren't available anywhere else?
GOP to Dumbass: "Thanks, but you've already done quite enough."
Will they have a stripper that looks like Ann Coulter ? I'm all for equal opportunity for well hung trannies.
The toughest part is telling the pole from the Coulter.
There wasn't enough duct tape in the entire state, if you know what I mean, and I think you do.
Because Gun Nuts R NUTS, it's time to read or re-read this Fast & Furious article. http://features.blogs.fortune.cnn.com/2012/06/27/…
BTW, still can't submit to wonkville. Anyone else having probs? I could submit a week or two ago. Now I can't.
Last time I tried to post, a dialog box appeared, requesting, amongst other information, a domain code. I was unable to type or otherwise enter anything in the domain box.
I just tried it again in IE9 – it worked for some reason, this time.
Some things I learned this week::
A) GHW Bush and wife will not be attending the GOP convention because the Romneys are even greedier than they are
B) Mitt Romney is Richard Nixon sans the five o'clock shadow
C) Over 1/2 of deaths every year by guns in the USA are suicides (true story)
D) Wolf Blitzer can expel 18 liters of bullshit per second
E) Barbara Walters either has a semblance of a soul or is one cheap bitch
F) F is for Fake
Bizarrely functional sub-human Louis Gomert hears of Colorado shooting; opens mouth and says something about how it is caused by lack of Judeo-Christians.
I banned you from wonkville. I don't like your posts.
I've heard they'll be exhuming graveyards for their Michele Bachmann look-alike.
Gee, what happened to Chimpy's ranch – the place where he used to love to cut brush and hold hands with the King of Saudi Arabia? Oh, now that he doesn't need it anymore to con the dumb shits voting for him, he's off to the comfortable mansion in Dallas.
I believe that "ranch", err pig farm was purchased for the Pretzeldential campaign in 1999 and sold right after 2008.
~
Ok, I followed the HuffPo link and looked at the slide show- what is with Laura?
She looks almost as stupid as her husband.
But with better meds.
Those eyes….
OMIGOD – The Stepford Wives was a documentary!
She doesn't photograph well, does she?
George looks like he's drunk enough to fall over and Laura, who looks equally drunk, is trying to hold him up.
Years of drinking and drugging to bear her lot in life have caught up with her.
Lord have mercy, Laura! Enough with the face fixin'!
I do like Bush the First's socks, though. So patriotic!
With luck, I can get a ticket to the Brigham Young themed club, 38 girls dressed in prairie whites and magic underwear.
All under 15 years in age.
Fifteen summers was all she had known
And her skin was soft like the velvet
Further to Designer_Rants' post, one could make the argument that singing 'Hey Joe' at the ballpark instead of 'doG Bless America' might be more intellectually honest. I've always been more partial to Hendrix's version, Patti Smith also too, than the Leaves' take, but either way it might be nice to tone-down the violence and make it more like ♪♫ Hey Jim ♫♪.
stay at home and jack off to the strippers
Teabagger Fore-in Policy?
Is it rude of me to speculate on whether he was even *invited*?
It would be irresponsible NOT to speculate…
In all fairness, for a lot of non-closeted Republicans this will be their only chance to ever see a woman naked.
Strippers? In MY interwebs?
It's just as likely as you might think.
Online Snowbilly-Clone peelers: AIRTIGHT PROOF THAT GOD IS AS DEAD AS ELVIS.
Mighty gracious of W to decline, being as every conservative has completely forgotten how totally he hosed the country and the entire world for eight – long – painful – disastrous – years, and to remind them would simply be, um, inconvenient.
Same for big Dick Cheney, and Powell, and Rice, and Rumsfeld, and Wolfowitz, Bolten, [damn I'm gonna puke]…
Will his codpiece be attending?
If you follow the links to Derrick's pix you will not regret it. Also, too, you will figure out where he is. But mostly DO EEET because BEYOOTIFUL birdie pix.
I have done that thing- there are very beeyootiful birdie pix there. I didn't figure out where he is, but some of those boids don't come 'round here, so I know he's somewhere far West of here.
Those birds are natives of the mid-Western states, I think. Certainly not the far western ones. We do see great blue herons and snowy egrets, but a lot of those birds are not familiar to me at all. And you should see Derrick's pic of a Pileated Woodpecker. The resolution is simply amazing. Also too the bird looks so good, it's almost fake, if you know what I mean.
I have a thing for birds.
No where near as exotic as SoCal. I'm in Lincoln, Ne. Nebraska is actually a pretty good place for birds since it's centrally located and right on the Central Migration Super Highway. We get a smattering of Eastern, Western, Northern and Southern species. Just got to know where to look for them and the time and patience to do it.
Married or broke?
BOTH!!!!!Sent from my iPhone
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