We can’t believe we forgot to watch the “live stream” of Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio’s press conference — which wasn’t on the teevee because of how the media is colluding to protect the illegal alien “president” — and he has some news! In fact, Arpaio’s “posse” of investigators into the national security threat (true quote!) that is B. Hussein are so good at their jobs, they even found the 95-year-old former state employee who signed Bamz’s birth certificate in the first place!
But wait! If they found the employee who signed it coming up on 51 years ago, wouldn’t that mean it hadn’t been forged? Oh you sweet, simple thing. No. You see, “It’s the codes.”
The AP is on the case!
Mike Zullo, the posse’s chief investigator, said numeric codes on certain parts of the birth certificate indicate that those parts weren’t filled out, yet those sections asking for the race of Obama’s father and his field of work or study were completed.
Zullo said investigators previously didn’t know the meaning of codes but they were explained by a 95-year-old former state worker who signed the president’s birth certificate. Zullo said a writer who published a book about Obama’s birth certificate and was aiding investigators let them listen in on an interview he conducted of the former state worker.
There you have it. “Codes.” Codes that said parts of it were left blank, even though they were filled in. You have to get up pretty early in 1961 to fool Sheriff Joe Arpaio!
But what lies is the Hawaii Attorney General’s office telling, to cover this up, again?
“President Obama was born in Honolulu, and his birth certificate is valid,” [a spokesman] said in a statement. “Regarding the latest allegations from a sheriff in Arizona, they are untrue, misinformed, and misconstrue Hawaii law.”
Well, that’s what they would say. The truth is out there.
[AP]
{ 200 comments }
"Barack Obama Was Never Born"
I believe the term used by AEI was "spawned."
Like a catfish or something.
I watch a lot of old X Files episodes. I could help Arpaio along with this.
"He was created in a lab at area 51 in NM by a technology we have yet to understand. Strage sightings of turban-wearing, Sharia Law – spouting, aliens in ovoid spacecraft were reported in the area by locals during the time Obama was said to have been born. There were also numerous reports of cows mysteriously disappearing in the area. To this day, the Air Force will not release these reports to the general public,"
These rednecks have no imaginations! Memo to Arpaio: Watch moar teevee!!!!
I like it. Area 51 is in Nevada tho.
It's raining like fuck here today. Let's hope in never rains in Maricopa fucking county again.
It's raining stupidity there as we speak.
Please send that real rain this way!
The rain should start again the day Arpaio is run out of office.
The Higgs boson was not identified until 2012. Without the Higgs boson there can be no mass. So how did Barack Obama exist in 1961?
QED
QCD
The President is made of dark matter?
Why you gotta play the race card?
The Higgs boson walks into a church, and the priest says, Hey, we don't allow Higgs bosons in here–your nickname is blasphemous. And the Higgs boson says, Oh yeah? Without me, how can you have Mass?
Joe is speaking in code, with his 'no blahs' dog whistle
Code back atcha Joe: ─••• ••─ •─•• •─•• ••• •••• •• ─
.. .- — .- ..-. ..- -.-. -.- .. -. –. .. -.. .. — – .-.-.- … …. . .-. .. ..-. ..-. .— — .
Morse and remorse. Cool.
simply dashing
Seems dotty to me.
I see your point.
-.- . . .–. / ..-. ..- -.-. -.- .. -. –. / – …. .- – / -.-. …. .. -.-. -.- . -.
if you're on a mac, how did you do that?
PeeCee
This dolt has reached and transcended that point whereby the fuss you make about such-and-such begins to say more about you than about the idiotic thing you've been ranting over ad nauseum..
He's confusing keeping his mouth moving with avoiding federal prosecution.
At what point do these assholes transcend out of the public discourse? Four years and four months?
Like a bulldog with an invisible bone in his mouth.
"Quixotic" = "foolishly impractical especially in the pursuit of ideals"
"Arpaic" = ???
I can only come up with acronyms til I get more caffeine —
"Anal Retentive Prick Asserts Insane Conclusions"?
Lemme try.
"Foolishly impractical and sweaty, especially in the pursuit of ideals"
Lord. Your new avi gave me a fright!
Frankenberry? More like Frightenberry, amirite?
Just a temporary glitch. Nothing to see here. Move along.
Dude, that describes EVERYTHING that Sheriff Joe has ever done.
Arpaio speaks from experience, as he rose from the muck.
Sheriff Joe: Gol dang it deputy, I told you to round me up a little "posse!"
I beg to differ. There's no evidence he rose.
Joe and Jan are why AZ can't have nice things.
I didn't know my kids went to visit Joe and Jan. Was wondering where they were.
Oh, I'm sure there are a hell of a lot more reasons than just those two.
Jon, also, too. (Kyl, major league asshole in the Senate.)
Oh. And for fuck's sake.
That's ironic, because I wish Sheriff Joe was never born either.
Derpaio has a brain code. He's taking antihistamines
It's time to again reopen the murder investigation of Glenn Beck. Clearly, Arpaio won't let something like jurisdiction or decency get in the way.
Or common sense, or intelligence….
What we've got here is a failure to communicate.
If the birth certificate was not completed properly, that means the "individual" associated with it doesn't exist. QED.
Wait, I'm confused. He's a sheriff? That can't be right.
And is Orly Taitz a dentist, a lawyer, or a researcher? I think the conspiracy is that none of these people are pedigreed properly, yet they command a shitload of attention.
OH MY GOD… I just had an epiphany… since they earn attention by bloviating and making nonsense for a camera spectacle, they're not just wingnuts…
…they are the new Jersey Shore!
Oh man, that's such a diss to Snooki and JWow.
Deputy Dawg would be a marked improvement.
Or Quick Draw McGraw!
I'll do the thinnin' around here, and don't you fergit it!
KABONG!
So – Sheriff Joe isn't the dumbest guy in the county. There are all those jokers who voted him in.
No, the ones who vote for him are fear stricken retirees. the really dumb ones are the people who actually buy their gawd awful books
You've heard of the Danvinci Code….well Joe has his own, its called DaDumbfuck Code.
I could not give less of a shit. Please go away Joe.
DAMMIT! After all the trouble the Democrats went to to smuggle a Kenyan Muslim into the country, plant fake notices of his birth in the 1961 Honolulu Advertiser, educate him to hate America at an Indonesian madrasa, cover up the years he spent as a spy for Pakistan, set him up as a community organizer, get him elected to his first term as President, the whole freaking plan is now going to fall apart because some idiot screwed up the codes on his fake birth certificate! DETAILS, PEOPLE!
It's this kind of sloppiness that will be the undoing of our efforts to institute sharia law death panels at the FEMA re-education camps.
Hey, I have been tirelessly working to institute sharia law death panels at my local FEMA re-education camp. I just keep getting distracted by free healthcare and food stamps.
The Smoking Man would like a word…
No! Don't talk to him! Trust no one!
You know who _else_ smuggled a Kenyan Muslim into the country, planted fake notices of his birth in the 1961 Honolulu Advertiser, educated him to hate America at an Indonesian madrasa, covered up the years he spent as a spy for Pakistan, set him up as a community organizer, and got him elected to his first term as President?
Nixon?
Alexander Payne?
Yeah, too bad they didn't think to pick a Muslim man who looks whiter than Arpaio and give him a super white sounding name like Bob Johnson.
It is easier to believe in the Arpaio Code than deal with the fact that US Amercia voted a Nearer with a furriner sounding name into the office of Preznit.
It's a pity this isn't in New Mexico, because then we could neatly tie in Roswell…
The codes make the connection crystal clear to any real patriot, and to deny this is to forsake the baby Geebis.
The Tea Tards don't care! New Mexico!!! Why not? Just do it anyway!
The Duh Grinchy Code?
The 95-year-old also explained that in the upcoming election he was supporting Calvin Coolidge.
After explaining he'd invested his entire retirement account in American Buggy Whip, he predicted a World Series sweep by the Boston Braves.
Boston sucks, man; the Philadelphia As all the way!
Ma, Ma, where's my Pa?
In the White House, ha, ha, ha!
Edit: Oops! Wrong Pres. Sorry!
(Still love it, though.)
NEEDS MORE SEX-CRIMES INVESTIGATIN'.
This is not a problem at all. According to Romney, Obama only need to incorporate himself as Barack Obama Inc, and then he will be able to get a full personhood.
Because corporation are peple, my friends.
And he can retroactively call himself born anywhere at anytime. The Romney way of doing things is actually very helpful.
And retroactively be baptized into the "right" religion.
And, of course, incorporate retroactively.
Elementary my dear dumbfuck.
It never occured to me how much Arpaio resembled consulting detective Sherlock Gnomes.
"Ella Fitzgerald, my dear Whopper."
A conspiracy so vast and so well done you'd have to be a moron to pay any attention at all.
What is Morse code for "You are a freakin' idiot, Sheriff!!" ?
Duh duh-duh duh duh-duh duh duh duh-duh duh duh-duh duh duh
See above.
-.– — ..- / .- .-. . / .- / ..-. .-. . .- -.- .. -. .—-. / .. -.. .. — – –..– / … …. . .-. .. ..-. ..-. .-.-.- /
The truth is out there.
So is Arpaio.
Mitt's tax returns have missing information as well – All of it.
How on earth has this guy not had a stroke yet?
He has, his body just hasn't caught on.
His brain, however…
He pledged his soul to Satan, and Ol' Scratch don't even want that thing.
Codes?! I can help! Venusians are always tapping out secret codes and their mysteries though my mercury fillings. They've already given me Obama's complete Pakistan-Mars teleportation schedule AND the locations of the next five times Jesus will appear in a tortilla.
I bet I could be one of them Posse Chief Investigators.
"Posse Comitatus…"
"Did you just call me a pussy communist?"
Your comment puts me in mind of the Search for Extraterrestrial Intelligence (SETI).
Maybe we should embark on a search for Terrestrial Intelligence. I suspect that, well, we will find that there is none. It's in the codes, man!
Eric Idle Libel!
So remember, when you're feeling very small and insecure,
How amazingly unlikely is your birth,
And pray that there's intelligent life somewhere up in space,
'Cause there's bugger all down here on Earth.
So Hawaii isn't part of the US and doesn't issue real birf certificates and goodness knows what else.
Bad news for my dad who was born in Hawaii. Do you know what the difference between my dad's and the President's birth certificates is? My dad's says "Territory of Hawaii" instead of "State of Hawaii"
My last comment got deleted?!?!?!? I guess editrix was right, intense debate has been taken over by Sherrif Joe.
Mine, too. Musta been the Latin quote.
I mentioned "time lord" so that must really set off the foil lined hat crowd.
Scott Baio
Joe Arpaio
There's something here that sounds like code to me.
This is almost as interesting as that whole "Davinci Code" thing and should probably be made into a summer blockbuster starring Tom Hanks as Sheriff Joe in "The Arpaio Code"
Not Steven Seagal?
Gary Busey's big toe was born for that role.
I was born, also, today July 18th, as well as Nelson Mandela, Clifford Odets, Goldie Taylor and , best of all, Red Skelton!
Wait. Is that code?
Good night and God Bless.
Happy birthday, Lizzie!
Happy Birthday! Tomorrow is my birthday so in your honor I'll starti drinking right now.
Prove it! PROVE IT!
Yea! Tits or GTFO!
Happy New Year, Liz.
We knew you we're special but WOW, you're very, very special. Happy Birthday. Oh, you forgot to mention that Willie Nelson was also born on July 18th.
And, according to NPR radio moments ago, Vin Diesel.
A birthday upfist for you, girl, and a thousand more!
You have those in England? I thought birthdays were an American thing. Did they give you one when you moved here?
Is that like when young Chinese ladies come to the US and pick a new name? Generally, in my experience, "Jennifer."
Happy birthday you lobsterback infiltrator.
Hey Lizzie, wishing you the best on your birthday. In lieu of usual horrorscope, I’ll share from this geekworthy new numbers trivia book I just bought myself for my own early-bday… Whereby: if your birth date is stated in europe-friendly format with zero included I can share that 18.7 or 1807 (eighteenth day seventh month) is the fifth voracious number. So go and be voracious* sweet girl!
*because I could not find anything elsewhere on teh internets about voracious numbers it’s occurred to me maybe it’s a figment of the author’s imagination – not that anything’s wrong with that, imaginary numbers sometimes outperform their reputations…
Excellent!
"Red" Skelton. I knew it all along.
Happy Birthday, Love!
Pics or it didn't happen!!
http://boston.cbslocal.com/2012/07/17/woman-tries…
2L:
I hope it wasn't rush hour. I can just see the folks packing in behind her, and about half way up realizing maybe that wasn't such a hot idea.
I'm betting money on her Tea Party credentials.
Oh yay! Happy Birthday! And happy co-July Birthday month, I'm 12 days into being all kinds of 40. Your born-on-this-day people are way cooler than mine though – I just got Sly Stallone, W and Ronald Reagan's second wife Nancy. Much love.
Oh yours are ghastly! Thank God for you, single-handedly raising the honour and merit of the day.
Happy BD, hope Mr. L is recovering nicely.
Happy Birthday!!
(One of my girls was born on Hitler's B-day, but I like your "birthday buddies" better.)
2L:
Also – (again, thank you Public Radio) – Martha Reeves of Martha and the Vandellas. Hope you are Dancing In the Street during this Heatwave.
And Screaming Jay Hawkins. When the Rolling Stones toured the USA, they thanked the R&B pioneers and Blues musicians they'd listened to in England by hiring them to open their shows.
Screaming Jay Hawkins began his act by popping out of a coffin.
There's music in your stars, 2L!
And lots of negroes! Yay!!!
2L:
And Hunter Thompson. Thank you, Writers' Almanac and Garrison Keillor.
Best of all – You!
Read it as Arpaio's "pussy" instead of "posse". Might take the rest of the day to recover from that image. Is it wrong to start drinking at 9:00 am?
Since when do Sheriffs just embroider their star onto a polo shirt? That is SOOOOOO LAME!
Silk screening would be just fine.
Or how about one of those gold star badge decals they give kids when they take a tour of the Sherrif's HQ?
This is, after all, the state that allowed BOTH the Japanese to attack us AND convinced McDonald's to serve Spam.
Hawaii had it coming, wearing those grass skirts low on her hips…
Did a record label sign the Insane Arpaio Posse or did they have to set up a Kickstart project for their next CD?
The only one telling the truth in this matter is George Lopez.
Red Neck Code?
Arizona Tax Dollars hard at work.
We've laughed at the birthers' attempts to uncover the time-traveling Democrat party conspiracy to make Obama born in America retroactively, but now that Rush Limbaugh has discovered how Democrats went back to the early 90s to create a Batman villain named Bane, which sounds just like Bain, so that The Dark Knight Rises would damage Mitt Romney's chance of winning the election, we know the time-traveling Democrat conspiracy is real!
a real time traveling democrat would make sure kitty harris never got elected.
A very reasonable maxim for living life is "never listen to a guy with a mustache." Sorry, Mike Zullo.
They didn't speak to the 95 year old, they were only allowed to listen in to tapes of an interview with him. "Republicans" and "tapes" in the same sentence pretty much says it all to me.
This is the long-form version of "I know a guy who told me his cousin has proof that …" How soon until drivers who get pulled over in Maricopa County need to show secret birth certificate codes, along with license, registration and passport?
This is great news for manufacturers of medication for psychotics.
And some people say government can't do anything right. Sheriff Joe sure proves them wrong !
They need to shrink his government down a wee bit more before they can fit him in that bathtub…
Remember: if you don't give full faith and credit to a Hawaiian birth certificate, you hate the Constitution.
Yeah, but, NEGRO!
As you may recall, Negroes are exactly why there's the Full Faith and Credit Clause to begin with.
Zullo said a writer who published a book about Obama's birth certificate and was aiding investigators let them listen to an interview he conducted with the former state worker.
Dollars to donuts says it's Jerome Corsi.
Okay, but Sheriff Joe gets to eat the donuts.
If Obama was never born that means that he is really just a giant fetus, which means that republicans should love him? Gah! My head hurts.
“President Obama was born in Honolulu, and his birth certificate is valid,” [a spokesman] said in a statement. “Regarding the latest allegations from a sheriff in Arizona, they are untrue, misinformed, and misconstrue Hawaii law willfully.”
/fixed
More proof that Obama is a magic negro!
Maybe he and Orly should hook up and make some [Redacted] babies.
Somethun bout this pic……doesn't he have a profile on HOBO-SEXUALS?
No, they kicked him off. He was scarin' away all the hobos.
Just wait until they discover Barry's time machine. Then the jig will be up.
So to speak.
Meanwhile in birther koo koo land, Arpaio scours a random lake bed for clues.
Since it's Arizona during a drought, this reads like a replay of "Holes."
The truth is in there. And eventually Sherrif Joe's gonna get so deep into it that he'll be looking out from between his own teeth.
“Regarding the latest allegations from a sheriff in Arizona, they are untrue, misinformed, and misconstrue Hawaii law.”
Bureaucratic double talk. What are they hiding?
Who you gonna believe? Some faceless bureaucrat in exotic Hawaii or Sheriff Batman and his 95 year old Robin?
It will be a really strange moment when even Arpaio doesn't understand what Arpaio is trying to do anymore. He'll be calling his next press conference to argue with himself as two distinct personalities.
they have a fucking POSSE? a birther POSSE?
oh AZ never change!!
Joe used to watch a lot of Cowboy shows on television while he was growing up in Springfield, MA.
You know who else has a posse? http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Andre_the_Giant_Has_…
The best birthday present I have ever received was my beloved MrLimeylizzie singing "Happy Birthday" from his hospital bed in Los Angeles. He is back to normal and is awesome!
Great news!
"…allegations from a sheriff in Arizona, they are untrue, misinformed, and misconstrue Hawaii law.” Those native types are so quaint: all those words just to say "Bullshit".
Next week, Sheriff Joe's volunteer posse is expected to release its report documenting its investigation of the terrible sexual assult on Jerry Sandusky by packs of young boys.
Doesn't this guy have a real job?
I bet you didnt know that Barry Soweto has a fraudulent SS# also!!1!
Yup, his number is actually the number shared by a guy who lived six decades ago in the US northeast.
This CT is actually true. The willfully ignorant play along, cause SS#'s are…wait for it…recycled.
Unless this 95-year-old former state worker is claiming that she knowingly committed fraud when she signed it, or that she signed it in 1993, I'm not sure how exactly you get from "we found the Department of Health official who certified the birth certificate 50 years ago, and relied on the information she gave us," to "and therefore it must be a fake", by way of logic.
The CODES!!! It's all in the CODES!!!
From The Republic's article:
While Arpaio's investigators were in Hawaii for 10 days, they located a former local registrar who might have written coding on the copy of Obama's birth certificate posted on the White House website. The woman is now 95 years old.
After the team's return from Hawaii, a national leader in the so-called birther movement who has worked with the sheriff's volunteer investigators placed a call to the woman, pretending to be a news reporter. The woman, who Zullo referred to as "amazingly sharp," told the fake reporter that the numbers on Obama's birth certificate were inconsistent with the time and place of his birth.
Her information, other inconsistencies investigators said they discovered in documents posted on the White House website and the refusal of Hawaii officials to let Arpaio's investigators inspect the original birth certificate led the team to conclude the document is a fraud.
The team also discovered information that they said caused concern about Hawaii's lax standards for verifying where children are born or where their parents live.
Read more: http://www.azcentral.com/news/politics/articles/2…
Nine of those 10 days were probably spent on the beach with Donald Chump's investigators and umbrella drinks.
"The team also discovered information that they said caused concern about Hawaii's lax standards for verifying where children are born or where their parents live. "
AZ has lax standards too. Or better put, AZ lacks standards. I am sure the good people of AZ are proud to fund sheriff Joe's trip down the rabbit hole.
They phoned up a 95 year-old to get information under false pretenses? "Amazingly sharp" is one hell of a fig leaf, there.
At the risk of taking these residents of Wingnutzistan-stan-stan seriously, a clerk went over the document, checked the entries, and wrote in pencil simple numeric codes for data entry purposes.
Box 7g. asks "Is Resident on a Farm of Plantation?" There are two choices: "Yes" and "No." "No" is checked, and someone wrote in pencil "2."
Box 11 "Birthplace" (of Father). Entry is "Kenya, East Africa." Penciled "2." "1" would be "Within the United States" and "2" would be "Outside the United States."
Box 14 "Race" (of Mother). Penciled code is "1." Duh! Of course Caucasian is the first race on the list of possible choices.
Other boxes in which the information has not been filled have a "0" in pencil – meaning, no information provided.
This "code" is not exactly the ENIGMA.
Clear enough. A "1" in box 14 obviously meant that the kid's a socialist.
Joe (and others like him) are not just birthers, they're zombie birthers. They refuse to die.
Your move Donald.
"Your move Donald."
Oh, God, don't encourage him.
I have a numerical code for you to decipher, Sherrif Joe:
That does it! I'm writing a book on Mitt Romney's driver's license!
A sheriff in Arizona is spending his state's time and resources in Hawaii, why? Isn't this the same state that lets people die rather than providing Medicaid?
Thanks for clearing that up, Joe. Hard to believe, but you are making Arizona look bad.
Show us the long form 1040's !!!
Don't worry Barack, Sherrif Joke must be getting senile.
He can't find over 30,000 felony warrants, either…
http://www.azcentral.com/news/election/azelection…
Maybe Obammerz retroactively forged it?
The code was supplied by Stephen Gucci, from the record label.
Jesus. I am all for a civil society, but when will it be appropriate to deal with these people with blunt instruments?
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