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Not learning about being an American

Before George H.W. Bush became America’s lovable old “sensible Republican” grandpa, he was an angry, out-of-touch Republican president, who was flabbergasted to lose in ’92 to a fat pot-smoking southerner whom he publicly called a “bozo.” For most of his term, Bush’s chief of staff was unpleasant former New Hampshire Governor John Sununu, who was eventually fired (on George W. Bush’s suggestion) because he used government jets for personal travel to ski resorts, constantly. Probably he was very upset to not get to participate in the campaign against crazed reefer fiend Bill Clinton, so he’s super excited, in his current role as Romney’s “surrogate” (don’t worry, this means he talks up Romney on TV, not that he is carrying Mitt’s baby) to just totally slam on Barack Obama for being high all the time!

There is lots to love about this video, but what we like best is the implication that Barack Obama doesn’t understand the “American system” because he (a) spent his youth in Hawaii, which is part of America, (b) spent his youth getting high, like roughly 40 percent of all Americans, and (c) lived in Indonesia between the ages of six and ten (the perfect time to learn about capitalism) at a time when Indonesia was ruled by an anti-Communist U.S. backed dictator. We guess that’s more than one thing, but we love it all.

Later, John Sununu went on some other TV show and talked about how Barack Obama needs to learn how to be an American, because he has no private sector experience. We were about to make fun of a guy who took lots of private jet trips to ski resorts on the government’s dime for saying this, but high-level private sector execs totally assume that use of a private jet ought to be a part of one’s compensation, so never mind.

Anyway, John Sununu is an actual Arab (the Christian kind, but still) who was born in Cuba (pre-Castro, but still), so we vote that we get this lady to follow Romney around asking why he implanted his baby in an Arab Communist’s belly, via forbidden science. [TPM]

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