I LOVE THE '80S  4:15 pm July 17, 2012

George H.W. Bush Flunky Still Mad About Democrats And Their Weed

by Josh Fruhlinger

Not learning about being an American

Before George H.W. Bush became America’s lovable old “sensible Republican” grandpa, he was an angry, out-of-touch Republican president, who was flabbergasted to lose in ’92 to a fat pot-smoking southerner whom he publicly called a “bozo.” For most of his term, Bush’s chief of staff was unpleasant former New Hampshire Governor John Sununu, who was eventually fired (on George W. Bush’s suggestion) because he used government jets for personal travel to ski resorts, constantly. Probably he was very upset to not get to participate in the campaign against crazed reefer fiend Bill Clinton, so he’s super excited, in his current role as Romney’s “surrogate” (don’t worry, this means he talks up Romney on TV, not that he is carrying Mitt’s baby) to just totally slam on Barack Obama for being high all the time!

There is lots to love about this video, but what we like best is the implication that Barack Obama doesn’t understand the “American system” because he (a) spent his youth in Hawaii, which is part of America, (b) spent his youth getting high, like roughly 40 percent of all Americans, and (c) lived in Indonesia between the ages of six and ten (the perfect time to learn about capitalism) at a time when Indonesia was ruled by an anti-Communist U.S. backed dictator. We guess that’s more than one thing, but we love it all.

Later, John Sununu went on some other TV show and talked about how Barack Obama needs to learn how to be an American, because he has no private sector experience. We were about to make fun of a guy who took lots of private jet trips to ski resorts on the government’s dime for saying this, but high-level private sector execs totally assume that use of a private jet ought to be a part of one’s compensation, so never mind.

Anyway, John Sununu is an actual Arab (the Christian kind, but still) who was born in Cuba (pre-Castro, but still), so we vote that we get this lady to follow Romney around asking why he implanted his baby in an Arab Communist’s belly, via forbidden science. [TPM]

 

Hola wonkerados.

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{ 243 comments }

Nibbler of Niblonia July 17, 2012 at 4:19 pm

he's just mad cause his name looks like snu snu and he doesn't get any

Extemporanus July 17, 2012 at 4:37 pm

"Death by Sununu!"

Nibbler of Niblonia July 17, 2012 at 4:52 pm

some very dear friends of mine were once sentenced to death by sununu

MittBorg July 17, 2012 at 5:11 pm

You do realize that my curiousity will not let me sleep till I get every disgusting detail, don't you?

Nibbler of Niblonia July 18, 2012 at 9:40 am

didn't you see the episode? the mutant, the slut, and the robot saved them.

Generation[redacted] July 17, 2012 at 5:21 pm

Died of a crushed pelvis. Oh yes.

supernoun July 17, 2012 at 4:20 pm

God damn these Youngs and their illicit street drugs getting up in my Capitol and making me feel old, says John Su-No-No

Mittens Howell, III July 17, 2012 at 4:20 pm

Are you sure Sununu's not carrying Mitt Romney's baby? Have you checked on top of his car?

CthuNHu July 17, 2012 at 6:29 pm

This is the selfsame bloated philatelist toad-demon who called current NH governor John Lynch (D!) "the worst governor ever."

Yeah, that's the same Gov. Lynch who's kept about a 70% approval rating through his record four consecutive terms, beating an incumbent Republican gazillionaire governor in a squeaker for his first, and winning the rest by margins of 47%, 42% and, against a strong serious establishment-picked candidate (with Mr. Sununu being the NHGOP chair at the time) in a monster GOP year, 7.6%.

John H. Sununu is as honest as he is skinny and pretty, is what I am saying here.

Negropolis July 18, 2012 at 1:20 am

WIN

DrunkIrishman July 17, 2012 at 4:20 pm

That fat piece of shit has only been good for his role in Naked Gun. I hope he chokes on Barbara Bush's cock.

Mittens Howell, III July 17, 2012 at 4:21 pm

Why isn't Barack Obama a Rich Old White Fuck?

actor212 July 17, 2012 at 4:21 pm

He really wanted to be named "Sunoco" and be a real heir…

sullivanst July 17, 2012 at 5:27 pm

But he is a real airhead.

Bezoar July 17, 2012 at 4:22 pm

Nothing could be more American than that photo.

Generation[redacted] July 17, 2012 at 5:34 pm

Humphrey Bogart for our generation.

RadioSlut July 17, 2012 at 5:42 pm

It could be in Red, White, and Blue.
Not the BLACK and White of Stalinism.

ph7 July 17, 2012 at 4:23 pm

The bogeyman argument only works for people you don't know, for crissakes. Obama's been our Uncle for four years now. If he was going to touch us inappropriately, he would have done it by now.

anniegetyerfun July 17, 2012 at 5:03 pm

According to the wingnuts, the fact that Obama hasn't PERSONALLY come to your home and taken away your guns and white women is because he is saving that for his second term.

ph7 July 17, 2012 at 5:10 pm

I'm concerned that the white woman living in my house has a similar fantasy involving Barack coming into our home to take her.

MittBorg July 18, 2012 at 2:42 pm

Does she ever slip up and call you "Barack" in the middle of snu-snu?

MittBorg July 17, 2012 at 5:14 pm

Well, what can I say, annie, it's been great knowing ya. Write us from the WH if he lets you, after November. (Thinks: lucky bitch!)

kittensdontlie July 17, 2012 at 8:03 pm

I was hoping he would share some of his stash, like any 'bad' uncle would do.

bumfug July 17, 2012 at 4:23 pm

The whole damn Romney campaign is like an elaborate dirty trick run by Democrats. I can hear Obama's advisors plotting in the dark of night, "…and just when the 'McCain said Mitt's worse than Palin' thing is breaking, we hand a mic to fucking Sununu and let him go nuts."

MittBorg July 17, 2012 at 5:15 pm

You ain't kidding. I thought Obama vs. McCain was hilarious. This is like, High Fucking Tragedy. Mitt can't pull one foot off a gum-wrapper without getting the other into a pile of dog crap.

I know it's evil and mean and cruel of me to laugh so heartily, but hey.

sullivanst July 17, 2012 at 5:28 pm

Mitt can't pull one foot off a gum-wrapper without getting the other into a pile of dog crap.

Even though his teeth were already so perfectly positioned…

MittBorg July 17, 2012 at 6:46 pm

Ooooh. You even meaner than MEEE, dood.

Butch_Wagstaff July 17, 2012 at 7:15 pm

I will be following you now for this.

actor212 July 17, 2012 at 4:23 pm

"Look upon his face, ye Jonah Goldberg, and despair!
Nothing besides remains. Round the decay
Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare,
The low and saggy jowls stretch far away".

va_real July 17, 2012 at 4:31 pm

You are poetic today, actor212!

actor212 July 17, 2012 at 4:36 pm

I'm just a Shelley of my former self

va_real July 17, 2012 at 4:49 pm

But it Keats getting better…

actor212 July 17, 2012 at 4:51 pm

Yeats it does! Poe slobs, just don't know how Wilde it can be.

MittBorg July 17, 2012 at 5:17 pm

*Someone's been hitting the coffffff-eeeee!*

Or is it the coke? Dude, share.

PS: I tried to hit reply just now, but it pulled up your av, so if I accidentally unfollowed you, be sure to let me know, thanks.

MittBorg July 17, 2012 at 5:16 pm

Excellent, you horrible little man.

Goonemeritus July 17, 2012 at 4:23 pm

If you knew Sununu Like I know Sununu, none of this would surprise you.

MittBorg July 17, 2012 at 5:18 pm

Awright. Spill the dirt.

I mean I've read a lot about him over the years and tried to keep track of this creep, but you sound like you have *inside info.*

Goonemeritus July 17, 2012 at 7:24 pm

No, the If you Knew Sununu line was from one of our former poet laureates poems. Billy Collins

MittBorg July 17, 2012 at 7:48 pm

I haz a disappoint, Goon.

DrunkIrishman July 17, 2012 at 4:24 pm

Anyone else think Sununu looks like the bastard lovechild of actor Edward Herrmann and Star Wars gangster Jabba the Hutt?

Hammiepants July 17, 2012 at 4:41 pm

Brilliant.

MittBorg July 17, 2012 at 5:19 pm

I'll have to go check, but I will say that he looks like a multi-chinned librarian of my timid childlhood who sported a hideous wig.

Jukesgrrl July 17, 2012 at 7:55 pm

But stuffier than both of them put together.

DrunkIrishman July 17, 2012 at 4:24 pm

Sununu is just pissed he hasn't seen his pecker since the H.W. administration.

SorosBot July 17, 2012 at 4:24 pm

Well John Sununu certainly knows how to create jobs, considering how many Jobs HW Bush created in his day.

Gratuitous World July 17, 2012 at 4:24 pm

Smoking weed is way worse than funnelling crack to the inner city blahs when an unnamed former president was head of the CIA.

MittBorg July 17, 2012 at 5:20 pm

But of course!~ After all, the blahs are only blahs, and who cares if they die, but one of OUR precious younguns might just ingest that weed.

sullivanst July 17, 2012 at 5:32 pm

When the whites tried to smoke weed, our guy was so concerned about their welfare he intercepted it.

DrunkIrishman July 17, 2012 at 4:24 pm

Sununu is the type of guy you just know can't control his flatulence. I pity his wife.

MittBorg July 17, 2012 at 5:21 pm

And I'll bet he eats an awful lot of ful (yes, as a matter of fact, that IS pronounced "fool").

Chet Kincaid July 17, 2012 at 5:43 pm

You know who ELSE couldn't control his flatulence?!

lunchbox360 July 17, 2012 at 5:56 pm

Besides me? John Goodman?

MittBorg July 17, 2012 at 6:50 pm

Gee Dumbya. The stories are legion of his farting on his friends, family, and myrmidons. Disgusting fucker. Nothing against a good hearty fart, mind you, it's just that it's a nasty thing to do to people down the ladder, so to speak.

Chet Kincaid July 18, 2012 at 3:35 pm

Dood, had you said "Hitler" this time, you'd have been right on the money! http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howabo

rickmaci July 17, 2012 at 4:25 pm

Ay-Rab, born in Q-ba?

Does that make him a Harabanera?

Nostrildamus July 17, 2012 at 5:04 pm

Harabanera is important in the making of jerk.

MittBorg July 17, 2012 at 5:23 pm

John Sununu needs no help whatsoever in the making of jerk.

DrunkIrishman July 17, 2012 at 4:25 pm

The last time Sununu got laid, Barbara Bush actually had brown hair.

Guppy July 17, 2012 at 5:38 pm

The gray-hair or the bottle-blonde?

sullivanst July 17, 2012 at 5:46 pm

Battle-axe.

WhatTheHeck July 17, 2012 at 4:25 pm

I didn’t read this post. I just accidentally inhaled it

Extemporanus July 17, 2012 at 4:38 pm

This post totally gave me a contact comment.

Callyson July 17, 2012 at 4:26 pm

"The only people who seem to cover our comments are your station, the rest of the media seems to ignore it"

Yeah–I haven't heard anything about how Obama is a bad American/Obama is stooping to such a low level/Obama is debasing the Presidency at all…

Yawn…

Left_Leftie July 17, 2012 at 4:55 pm

And whose comments is he talking about? News commentators comments? So he's saying we need to have full on news stories commenting on commentators comments?

Circular Firing Squad indeed.

MittBorg July 17, 2012 at 5:26 pm

Girl, you trying to apply LOGIC to their comments again? HARMONY times I gotta tell you, logic and RWNJs cannot coexist in the same spacetime? Harmony?

Srsly, if you actually try to parse what they're saying, you'll go nuts. Think of it as watching a mynah bird talking. They might actually have a fucking clue, and they might not. The miracle is, they can talk at all.

SorosBot July 17, 2012 at 4:26 pm

And idiot, Obama worked for a major law firm in Chicago, then was a professor at the University of Chicago law school. Those are both private sector jobs. So besides being immaterial, what he's saying is a lie.

Blueb4sunrise July 17, 2012 at 4:32 pm

I'm not clear on this…..
Are you saying that John Sununu is a liar?

SorosBot July 17, 2012 at 4:33 pm

What he's saying is a lie, but he might not be a liar, he could just be a moron who has no idea what he's talking about.

Blueb4sunrise July 17, 2012 at 4:49 pm

He's a liar.

sullivanst July 17, 2012 at 5:35 pm

All of them, Katie.

Also, his boss is a craven fucking liar.

MittBorg July 17, 2012 at 5:28 pm

Um, ahem, Soros, dear. We are talking about Republicans here? THE PEOPLE WHO LIE EVERY TIME THEY OPEN THEIR FUCKING MOUTHS?

There, I feel SO much better.

Chet Kincaid July 17, 2012 at 5:45 pm

Thanks for that, everyone seems to forget it.

sullivanst July 17, 2012 at 5:48 pm

Not to mention, the several millions he earned from his private-sector book publisher.

Hammiepants July 17, 2012 at 4:26 pm

Well, they DO say, "pass the dutchy on the LEFT hand side", so you know: SOCIALISM.

emmelemm July 17, 2012 at 7:47 pm

If it was pass it on the RIGHT hand side, it would all be OK?

sbj1964 July 17, 2012 at 4:26 pm

Yo,Barrys not home dude.No dude, I'm barry! Barrys not home dude! I would not trust a President that has never tried Pot.Let alone Caffine.Mormons?

Mittens Howell, III July 17, 2012 at 4:28 pm

Sununu can go and retroactively fuck himself.

MittBorg July 17, 2012 at 5:29 pm

Perhaps you should wish for him to retroactively find his P-E-N-I-S first.

Mumbletypeg July 17, 2012 at 4:28 pm

I was hoping to post this earlier, perchance on the War on Huma thread but Josh you're here to help me re-up…

Anyway, John Sununu is an actual Arab (the Christian kind)

Somewhere in an old-folks home, actual Arab-coddlin', Gadafi-lovin', despotic has-been Farrakhan is laughing playing the world's tiniest violin in merriment~

MittBorg July 17, 2012 at 5:30 pm

Dude, I mean, dudina, it's even worse than that.

John Sununu is a fucking PALESTINIAN. You know what Pamela Geller and her nutbag horde call Palestinians. I wonder why that harpy is keeping her beak out of this one.

Chet Kincaid July 17, 2012 at 5:47 pm

What is "Arab-coddlin'"? What's wrong with Arabs?

Mumbletypeg July 17, 2012 at 6:33 pm

Nothing from my point of view.
My comment is just window dressing for the fact previously unknown to me that Louis Eugene Wolcott was, early on and toward the end of his career, something of a violin virtuoso. I could qualify the "Arab" translation of Farrakhan ('charmer') to reinforce it's the culture, not persons outright, being coddled but I don't honestly have enough working knowledge of the relations between efforts toward Palestinian sovereignty, radicalizing American Moslems through NOI, Farrakhan's earlier-reaped criticism for 'pal'ing around with terrists" regarding his status w/ Gaddafi, and what have you, to reposition my comment's weaknesses. Window dressing undone. Ya caught me with my drawers down.

Callyson July 17, 2012 at 4:29 pm

"There has been no experience in his life in which he's earned a private sector paycheck that meant anything."

Um, you know you just described the working experience of about 98% of American workers, right?

va_real July 17, 2012 at 4:36 pm

Sadly, he probably has no idea what you mean.

OneDollarJuana July 17, 2012 at 4:56 pm

Sure applied to me that summer I worked for a styrofoam cup factory.

MittBorg July 17, 2012 at 5:32 pm

I'm sure Sununu doesn't even KNOW that the average family of FOUR in America has to live for a whole fucking YEAR on half of what Mitt Romney claims in tax deductions for his fucking HORSE.

AAAAUUUUGGGH, I'm getting furious again. 'Scuse me.

starfanglednut July 17, 2012 at 10:50 pm

There there, Sweetie. There There.

*pats teh Z's head and reapplies streaked clown makeup carefully.

MittBorg July 18, 2012 at 2:18 pm

Shoulda stuck around to see this. Instead, I went to bed in a bad, bad mood. Our 'Coot has a growth on his foot. Took him to the doctor yesterday. They aspirated it and sent it to the path lab. He came home bleeding and VERY upset, proceeded to throw up all day, and sleep. Didn't eat at all, barely drank. He's doing better this morning, but good grief, that was worrisome!

Thanks for the pats, love. You are a darling girl.

actor212 July 17, 2012 at 4:29 pm

Clearly, Obama intercepted from Sununu.

Lionel[redacted]Esq July 17, 2012 at 4:29 pm

I can't wait for the over four hours of coverage to the crashing Romney campaign I am sure FOX News put on the air tonight.

OneDollarJuana July 17, 2012 at 4:29 pm

Does Sununu ululate while watching Mr. Sulu on Hulu and using an ulu? Just wonderin'.

Chill_Bill July 17, 2012 at 4:32 pm

Yes, in Honolulu.

WhatTheHeck July 17, 2012 at 4:33 pm

That was a lulu

MissTaken July 17, 2012 at 4:35 pm

While wearing lululemon

Extemporanus July 17, 2012 at 4:47 pm

He blew a blue ewe uvula in lieu of gluing Sulu.

Monsieur_Grumpe July 17, 2012 at 4:30 pm

Lessons On How To Be An American

1.Get yours at the expense of others
2.Avoid taxes
3.Buy a Hummer made in China
4.Vote blindly Republican
5.Serial adultery
6.Piss on the poor
7.Get even more at the expense of the world

va_real July 17, 2012 at 4:41 pm

I might add a little something about anti-intellectualism & the importance of deriding/ politicizing scientific research, but otherwise, I think this is pretty complete.

Vecchiojohn July 17, 2012 at 5:13 pm

Then there's the Full Colson: be a vicious asshole, go to jail for a felony, find Jesus, get out of jail and spend the rest of your life being a vicious Christian asshole.

Lionel[redacted]Esq July 17, 2012 at 4:30 pm

When you are stuck with surrogates like John Sununu, you have to ask yourself, is it worth having surrogates at all.

OneYieldRegular July 17, 2012 at 4:40 pm

Seriously, if this is the best Mitt can find, I shudder to think what his cabinet would like.

GeorgiaBurning July 17, 2012 at 4:57 pm

lots of white greasepaint, fake red noses and size 24 shoes. Plus all of them will fit into a Ford Focus limo with a funny sounding horn.

MittBorg July 17, 2012 at 6:54 pm

You're in *fine* form today!

sudsmckenzie July 17, 2012 at 5:04 pm

I was imagining the star wars scene where "Uncle Owen" is picking out droids. Hopeys "worst" is the dashing Corey Booker.

p.s. how is our lawsuit against 'The Never Ending Story going"? I'm not sure if I can keep the pool boy on.

MittBorg July 17, 2012 at 5:33 pm

When you have to send out surrogates (Pawlenty) to walk back the statements of your surrogates (Sununu), you've kind of already lost. Jus' sayin'.

Butch_Wagstaff July 17, 2012 at 7:04 pm

When I first read about this, I thought "Fuckin' Sununu"? Really? Why not just roll out some old cronies of Reagan while they're at it.
It's like when Tag/Trog/Topps/Whatever-The-Hell-His-Name-Is Romney said that Nugent's endorsement of his dad was so awesomely cool n' stuff.

Estproph July 17, 2012 at 4:30 pm

I bet Obama walked all over his lawn once.

actor212 July 17, 2012 at 4:32 pm

Probably smoked it

rickmaci July 17, 2012 at 4:31 pm

Is it just me or has the Republitard train gone completely off the rails?

widestanceromance July 17, 2012 at 4:43 pm

They were on the rails at one time?

rickmaci July 17, 2012 at 4:47 pm

Good point.

sullivanst July 17, 2012 at 5:37 pm

Lincoln?

MittBorg July 17, 2012 at 5:35 pm

It ain't just you, dude. I've been friends with Republicans for a good part of my life, and most of my Republican friends have either left the party, quit voting altogether, or refuse to discuss politics any more because even THEY can't defend this kind of shit.

Callyson July 17, 2012 at 4:31 pm

Meanwhile, the poll on the right hand side asked if I think Mitt Romney should release his taxes. After clicking "Yes, definitely," the next question was "Do you read sci – fi books?
Um, no, I get plenty of that just from keeping up with the news…

actor212 July 17, 2012 at 5:08 pm

You will if you read his returns!

ManchuCandidate July 17, 2012 at 4:31 pm

A rising tide of butthurt floats all assholes.

Extemporanus July 17, 2012 at 4:34 pm

Sunusnus? Snusunu? Sunusus?

Wait, wait…hold on. Okay…no, what? Oh, yeah, got it…

SununununnununununununununununununuHEE-HEE-HEE-HEE-HEE!!

Duuude…

widestanceromance July 17, 2012 at 4:44 pm

Sununununu-stan?

va_real July 17, 2012 at 4:46 pm

And then you're in the man from Mars
You go out at night eatin' cars
You eat Cadillacs, Lincolns too
Mercurys and Sununus

And you don't stop, you keep on eatin' cars…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SIRG0QOEkyM

SockBunny July 17, 2012 at 4:35 pm

Because going from living with your grandparents & your single mom on food stamps in order to economize, becoming the first Black President of the Harvard Law Review, writing a bestselling book, to winning a Senate seat and the White House in a landslide of your own making isn't work – it's what lazy black men do.

anniegetyerfun July 17, 2012 at 5:12 pm

Don't even get me STARTED on Welfare Queen Michelle Obama, who ran a major hospital (do NOT Google "Michelle Obama hospital", btw).

Biel_ze_Bubba July 17, 2012 at 5:21 pm

If Obama had bootstraps, they'd be in the Smithsonian by now.*

Any white dude with exactly the same story would be beatified by the teabaggers as a fucking Horatio Alger hero. (If, that is, he somehow turned out conservative.) What makes it a totally un-American story is that a black (and moderately liberal) guy did it.

*And teabagging racists would be bitching about it on the conservatard blogs, and howling for cuts to the Smithsonian's funding.

MittBorg July 17, 2012 at 5:37 pm

It's really delightful catching them in these contradictions. Especially since the vast majority of the people who vote Republican these days have lost all connection whatsoever to reality and can only gape like landed fish when these things are pointed out to them.

Chill_Bill July 17, 2012 at 4:37 pm

This old fart might be dumb and slow, but he knows that they are going to lose this election.

OneDollarJuana July 17, 2012 at 4:57 pm

Since most Americans vote on machines now, don't count on Dems gaining any seats.

mavenmaven July 17, 2012 at 4:37 pm

He has no idea how America works other than having been President of the United States for the last few years.

LesBontemps July 17, 2012 at 4:37 pm

If you knew what Sununu
Knows about quantum physics and Greek
And oil explorations and most favored nations
And the secret handshake of Deke,
Maybe you, too, like Sununu,
Would adopt a principal rule,
That you are the brightest, your light the lightest,
And everyone else is a fool.

–Calvin Trillin

MittBorg July 17, 2012 at 5:38 pm

Yes.

SoBeach July 17, 2012 at 4:40 pm

Is it just me or is today's "Obama isn't American enough" crap just a dog whistle to the birthers? If so it's absolute proof Mittens is well and truly, capital "F" screwed.

MittBorg July 17, 2012 at 5:39 pm

Especially since it got such a bad reaction, Mitt had to send TIM PAWLEZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ out to walk back what Sununu said. Oh, and Tim did a shitty job, reminding everyone why he lost in the early rounds.

sudsmckenzie July 17, 2012 at 4:40 pm

He's right, what does the President of the United States know about being American.

RadioSlut July 17, 2012 at 4:41 pm

Obama probably got his pot for free too.

fatbob54 July 17, 2012 at 4:52 pm

Well, you by a three finger lid, split it into 10 nickel bags, sell them during gym class, keep the rest and buy another nickel bag. You get free pot, and get the private sector, job creating business experience needed to be president of the US of A. Assuming you're a slick talking muslin plant who can't talk without a teleprompter who belongs to a Christian church with a minister who says bad things about America…

MittBorg July 17, 2012 at 5:41 pm

Here's what I want someone to explain to me: If President Obama was a secret Kenyan Muslim who only pretended to be a Christian so he could become President — why the FUCK would he pick a church like the one he picked? Wouldn't he want to pick some church that was REAL MAINSTREAM CHRISTIAN? Evangelical, even?

RadioSlut July 17, 2012 at 5:46 pm

Eight level chess is not easy when you're messed up on Maui Wowie and can't remember where you put the nuclear codes.

MittBorg July 17, 2012 at 6:57 pm

Been sharpenin' your snark on sabbatical, I see, Radio.

You never did tell me which of those guys in them pitchers wuz you.

OneYieldRegular July 17, 2012 at 4:43 pm

This is an excellent strategy, and I encourage Republicans across the land to get out there and accuse everyone of not being American enough.

Biel_ze_Bubba July 17, 2012 at 5:12 pm

Because pandering to Real Americans™ worked so well for Palin.

UW8316154 July 17, 2012 at 4:44 pm

Interception!!

owhatever July 17, 2012 at 4:45 pm

Conservatives really want a secretive, whining Massachusetts moderate vulture capitalist who invented Romneycare, and not this Obama guy because, you know.

weejee July 17, 2012 at 4:47 pm
BigSkullF*ckingDog July 17, 2012 at 4:48 pm

The only people to blame for guys like this are all the girls in his high school who refused to sleep with him. Thanks a lot ladies!

NellCote71 July 17, 2012 at 8:48 pm

I call it the Karl Rove syndrome.

LettucePrey July 17, 2012 at 4:49 pm

My first car was a Sununu. It was an ugly piece of shit, too.

Extemporanus July 17, 2012 at 5:30 pm

Funny, I didn't take you for a Lebanese.

Left_Leftie July 17, 2012 at 4:49 pm

20 years from now instead of a guy you would want to share a beer with it will be a guy you want to split a joint with. Barry's just ahead of the curve is all.

MittBorg July 17, 2012 at 5:44 pm

He just introduced the custom retroactively, man.

docterry6973 July 17, 2012 at 4:51 pm

I dunno, John Sununu's words carry a lot of weight with me. I may have to rethink my support of this Obama guy.

DahBoner July 18, 2012 at 6:15 am

As Sununu goes, so goes American Somoa….

proudgrampa July 17, 2012 at 4:52 pm

Really? This is all they got???

MittBorg July 17, 2012 at 5:45 pm

No, it's even worse. They already sent out Tim Pawlenty to walk back Sununu.

Chet Kincaid July 17, 2012 at 5:54 pm

With a leash and a poop-scooper.

MittBorg July 17, 2012 at 6:37 pm

Well, he made a pretty pathetic mess of it, so they sent out John McCain, I think.

starfanglednut July 17, 2012 at 10:57 pm

Who's next? That openly gay republican (hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahhahahahahahahahahhhaha) guy?

Whatshisname?

GeorgiaBurning July 17, 2012 at 4:53 pm

Mittens' has a surrogate? Well, if Ann isn't complaining, ok. But that just shows how these rich guys outsource EVERYTHING.

MittBorg July 17, 2012 at 5:46 pm

Er … ew.

I don't know if I'm more squicked about outsourcing the wife-fucking from Mittens' PoV or Ann's.

sullivanst July 17, 2012 at 5:50 pm

Err, turkey baster.

MittBorg July 17, 2012 at 6:38 pm

I'm sorry, what were you saying? The turkey just upped and ran right off the table.

widestanceromance July 17, 2012 at 4:55 pm

All this 'not-American' stuff is most disturbing, because it means we are at the gates of 'outside the mainstream.'

It's coming and it's unstoppable. Get used to hearing and/or blocking it out.

Eve8Apples July 17, 2012 at 4:58 pm

The GOP keeps edging closer to denouncing Obama as a "negro."

MittBorg July 17, 2012 at 6:39 pm

Oh, it's just a matter of time. Any minute now, one a them Cletuses like Haley Motherfuckin' Barbour is gonna open their mouth, and … as Rick Perry might say, "Ooops."

Butch_Wagstaff July 17, 2012 at 7:22 pm

Wouldn't surprise me if some asshole, during the convention, finally says one of those words that begins with "N" (and wouldn't it be fun for the GOP if it's a delegate?)

MittBorg July 17, 2012 at 7:49 pm

It's gonna happen, man. I'm just waiting to see who it's gonna be. They've had it on the tip of their tongues for eight years now, I reckon. The pressure must be getting unbearable.

Eve8Apples July 17, 2012 at 4:56 pm

Instead of smokin' weed, Hopey should make meth in his trailer or abuse prescription medication like real white America.

Caelan Aegana July 17, 2012 at 4:56 pm

Snobbery. It's what makes a Sununu, a Sununu.

anniegetyerfun July 17, 2012 at 5:14 pm

Nicely played, sir/madam.

Billmatic July 17, 2012 at 4:57 pm

Don't forget he's also Mexican, his mom is from El Salvador.

widestanceromance July 17, 2012 at 5:01 pm

From the looks of him, he is at least a dampback.

Nostrildamus July 17, 2012 at 4:58 pm

Over the past few years I've been continually depressed by the constant stream of "Obama's not really American" coming from the Right. What I finally realized was that, by now, they've shot their wad. The base just can't stay constantly terrified day in and day out – it's wearing – so each successive attack has less power than the last. It's to the point now that they just look ridiculous. They've effectively immunized Obama from further attacks of this nature, just in time for the election.

Fox n Fiends July 17, 2012 at 5:26 pm

yah its terrible. Imagine if he was a Mormon!

NellCote71 July 17, 2012 at 8:54 pm

Imagine if his grandfather had escaped to Mexico so he could have more than one wife.

RadioSlut July 17, 2012 at 5:32 pm

And this is why Obama hates, HATES America.

MittBorg July 17, 2012 at 5:48 pm

No, no, no, no, NO, Radio.

Obama hates *Amercia.*

sullivanst July 17, 2012 at 5:43 pm

They've immunized him? Ah, so that's why they're convinced he's retаrded.

MittBorg July 17, 2012 at 5:48 pm

Which might tend to explain why he hasn't wasted time and energy fighting off these attacks.

prommie July 17, 2012 at 4:59 pm

I will now translate Mr. Sununu: The President is Near!

Vecchiojohn July 17, 2012 at 5:20 pm

Ding!

MittBorg July 17, 2012 at 5:49 pm

(Whacks the bell with a hammer; beats a giant J. Arthur Rank gong; hits a can with a baseball bat.)

didgen July 17, 2012 at 5:01 pm

I want a president that understands my pot smoking, coffee drinking, alcohol imbibing, fornicating soul. I believe Mitt misses the point.

Caelan Aegana July 17, 2012 at 5:15 pm

What Mitt doesn't realize is that alcohol is a great cleaning solvent to get the coffee and smoke particulates off his circuitry.

anniegetyerfun July 17, 2012 at 5:16 pm

Well, I don't know – have you ever been involved in porn? I read on the internet that Mittens had specifically invested his money in kiddie porn. It's likely why he won't release his tax returns.

Extemporanus July 17, 2012 at 5:46 pm

Mitt Romney's jaw-dropping number of fluffer deductions will definitely not sit well with hardworking American parents facing skyrocketing out-of-pocket babysitter expenses.

(Unless they're Catholic, of course, in which case they have the tax free status of their church to fall back on when in need of such services.)

anniegetyerfun July 17, 2012 at 6:03 pm

Even if I were a hardcore Catholic, there is no way I would leave my kids in the care of the Church.

Extemporanus July 17, 2012 at 6:28 pm

And that is why you're not a job creating international child sex trafficking ring kingpin like tax dodging multi-millionaire Republican presidential nominee Mitt Romney.

Or Pope.

Mahousu July 17, 2012 at 5:03 pm

There's a typo in the Fox News chyron – it should read "Senile Advisor to Romney Campaign."

Vecchiojohn July 17, 2012 at 5:22 pm

How can you be sure it's a typo?

mr bojangles July 17, 2012 at 5:10 pm

c mon john, go haley barbour and give us a sneering 'the president is a nigger' rant!!

MittBorg July 17, 2012 at 5:51 pm

The Knights Who Say Ni!

sullivanst July 17, 2012 at 5:53 pm

Haley Barbour? How about the full Michael Richards? You know he has it in him!

PubOption July 17, 2012 at 5:12 pm

So, in wingnut land, it's perfectly acceptable to say that Obama has never earned a private-sector paycheck, but it's not acceptable to say the same about Ann Romney

anniegetyerfun July 17, 2012 at 5:17 pm

It's not OK, because she's not running for President, leave her out of this!

Of course, it's OK to talk about Teresa Heinz Kerry and HER tax returns as though SHE had run for office.

NellCote71 July 17, 2012 at 8:56 pm

8 years ago, too.

sullivanst July 17, 2012 at 5:44 pm

It's only acceptable when it's a lie, you see.

PubOption July 17, 2012 at 7:34 pm

That sounds about right.

Self-Uploader July 17, 2012 at 5:19 pm

George HW Throws-Up-on-the-Japanese-due-to-mixing-pills and alcohol Bush's flunky has a problem with Obama's drug use?

GeorgiaBurning July 17, 2012 at 5:32 pm

GHW was just experimenting, he didn't know. That's how they are at that age.

Fox n Fiends July 17, 2012 at 5:23 pm

So a Mormon walks into a bar and says "I need an Arab Cuban to foreignize a Hawaiian Halfrican"….

ASHLEIGH_Joe July 17, 2012 at 5:29 pm

Smoking… in Hawaii??

Did John Sununu just accuse Obama of smoking weed, as a toddler?

Blueb4sunrise July 17, 2012 at 5:32 pm

OFF TOPIC

Afternoon pick-me-up.
If you don't care for Bruce and the E-Streeet, don't watch.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1D1AZtGcA6k&fe

bobbert July 17, 2012 at 6:20 pm

Great clip, even if it did remind me that Big Man is gone and fucking John Sununu is still around.

Generation[redacted] July 17, 2012 at 5:35 pm
rickmaci July 17, 2012 at 5:37 pm

Hey Sununu you worthless POS. WE all know you are bitter and angry that during the '70's and 80's everyone else was having lots of fun doing chemically enhanced sex and you didn't get any. Get over it.

Chet Kincaid July 17, 2012 at 5:40 pm

The GOP is still taking marching orders from Limbaugh, I see. Last night, Lawrence O'Donnell covered Limbaugh advising that Romney should go after Obama's "drug use at Columbia" (which didn't happen, Obama did his weed and blow in high school). O'Donnell also helpfully pointed out that the mean age of Limbaugh listeners is 67.

Pithaughn July 17, 2012 at 5:47 pm

Tonight O'donnell will be asking, if Mitts sold Bain and it was worth 4 billion, why is he worth only 250 million now?
My guess? If folks think someone worth 250 million is a negative, they will shit bricks when they realize there is 3.75 billion floating around somewhere. Maybe that's why no tax returns are being released.

MittBorg July 17, 2012 at 6:02 pm

As an Offishul Oldz, let me just say, I'm so glad those fuckers will be eating dirt soon. I won't share my worms with them, either.

Guppy July 17, 2012 at 5:40 pm

Where were the Bush and Romney clans, say, between 1920 and 1933?

Mojopo July 17, 2012 at 5:41 pm

Fucker was just on CNN mouthing off some more, and Wolf was all like, "Aah hmm, surely to realize, nasal "n" sound, ah, hmm." This is my punishment for working from home.

chascates July 17, 2012 at 5:55 pm

He has little bitty eyes like Limbaugh so he's bound to be a freak.

RadioBowels July 17, 2012 at 6:01 pm

I just got my laptop back from a hard drive crash, so bear with me on this rant:
Let's not forget that the wingfucks hate H.W. Other than the chickenhawk neocons he coddled, he was a failure best not mentioned. He raised taxes, allowed the bogeyman of communism to go quietly, talked of a peace dividend, ran a limited war, was rather moderate (by today's standards) on social issues, he actually saw action in the military and was a one-termer. Like Ike and Nixon, he does not fit into their demented worldview.

Extemporanus July 17, 2012 at 7:01 pm

Yo Radio, I'm really happy for you, I'ma let you finish, but Extemporanus had one of the best laptop rants of all time!

Sent from my iPad.

RadioSlut July 17, 2012 at 8:45 pm

Thanks for sharing your experience, strength and hope. I too had to drag a POS Dell out in the last few days from out under the bed where all the books I plan to read lie in dust. I certainly would like to see those "Geniuses" at the "Bar" take an IQ test. I'm guessing 90-91 average. But the Apple process addiction is strong.

Extemporanus July 18, 2012 at 5:25 am

You know that I'm always there for you, bro…

Sadly, when my poisoned Apple re-ideated itself to death a short time later, all that I had to drag out from under my bed were dead cats and dog-eared fap pamphlets.

Speaking of which…

brb

FlownOver July 17, 2012 at 6:08 pm

What kinda name is Snoonoo, anyway? Sounds like those Al Capp ovoid cartoon characters from the 50's.

Either that or it's Arab.

Jukesgrrl July 17, 2012 at 8:05 pm

Yep. Palestinian. But a very special kind. Catholic … and a genius (can one be both?!). He's always bragging that he's in the Mega Society, which claims to be much more elite than the stupid Mensa that takes everyone in the top 2% of IQs. He would have been better off being a Cuban. At least that can get you a political position in Florida, a state with more clout in the Electoral College than Baby New Hampshire could dream of.

Chichikovovich July 17, 2012 at 6:34 pm

John Sununu? John Sununu. Where do I know that name? ….

Oh, yeah! He was the guy who sold Bush Senior on the stealth appointment of his former attorney general in New Hampshire, David Souter. Said he was going to be easy to appoint because he had no paper trail and he'd be a "Slam Dunk" for conservatives.

And face it, John, wingnut land will never, ever, ever, ever forgive you for that. They still talk about it. On Free Republic, whenever your name is mentioned, somebody is bound to bring up Souter. Denounce Obama all you like, they will never stop hating you.

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha……………………………….

Fraudulently_Joe July 17, 2012 at 7:09 pm

Au contrare, Sununu: Smoking pot is incredibly American. One might even say one of the most American things there is.

ETA: Can I just say I find it really funny that a website called "medicalmarijuanablog.com" is apparently blocked at my workplace, a cancer hospital? I can understand the general principle of blocking this sort of website, in workplaces, but it seems an odd choice for this particular workplace. Just sayin'.

MittBorg July 18, 2012 at 2:37 pm

That is some choice level of irony, yes.

Neoyorquino July 17, 2012 at 7:44 pm

We're gonna be doing a lot of doobie-rolling when we're living in a van down by the river!

BoatOfVelociraptors July 17, 2012 at 8:04 pm

When will you libtards understand? A government is put in place to pay middle management for people killing services (Blackwater/Xe, KBR, etc.), not to pay middle management to heal people.

ttommyunger July 17, 2012 at 8:09 pm

Ski Resorts? Really? I just can't picture that lardass on skis. A Toboggan, maybe; but it would have to be a really wide one.

arcadesproject July 17, 2012 at 8:12 pm

O's eyes are really spooky. The lright eye is conceited and sneering. The left eye is cold and blank. The guy in that piicture? That is not a nice guy.

NellCote71 July 17, 2012 at 9:00 pm

You see spooky. I see sexy.

MittBorg July 18, 2012 at 2:39 pm

Dood. The right eye is seeing kaleidoscopes, and the left one is seeing planets. Go roll a doobie, you'll feel (and think) better.

Negropolis July 18, 2012 at 12:24 am

Is he still mad about Daddy Jorge Bush's cokehead for a son? God, I sure hope so.

There is at least an entire decade that Dubya can't even remember, but it is Barack that had the drug problem? Really? Seriously? For real? But, he found Jesus at the end of a straw, so I guess that's all that matters.

DahBoner July 18, 2012 at 6:13 am

Kids, you have a choice:

Either smoke weed or live off your Daddy's millions by starting a business putting Americans out of work….

va_real July 17, 2012 at 4:55 pm

It's a Marvell, really…

Vecchiojohn July 17, 2012 at 5:01 pm

You all ought to be Pounded for such puns. Any Moore of this and I'll Lowell the boom on the lot of you.

actor212 July 17, 2012 at 5:03 pm

You're a Dahl for saying that. And your jokes Kilmer

va_real July 17, 2012 at 5:02 pm

I'll go if Hugo.

actor212 July 17, 2012 at 5:04 pm

So you're saying we're Donne?

Where's your Whitman!

va_real July 17, 2012 at 5:05 pm

Yes, but probably not for Longfellow.

actor212 July 17, 2012 at 5:07 pm

Oh, he's just being Thoreau in his job.

va_real July 17, 2012 at 5:19 pm

Well, I need Goethe vote… we're having a special election today. Can I Paz the baton on to a Hardy soul who can keep up with your Cummings & goings?

actor212 July 17, 2012 at 5:24 pm

I'm afraid, my friend, that I have to leave myself. I have a game of Tennyson.

sullivanst July 17, 2012 at 5:31 pm

Will you be taking the Carroll the way there?

Nothingisamiss July 17, 2012 at 5:33 pm

Oh good Lord do I love my wonkettes!

emmelemm July 17, 2012 at 7:44 pm

+ 1 million

Where else, such literate snarkers?

emmelemm July 17, 2012 at 7:52 pm

It's gonna happen. The question is, will it make any difference at that point?

MittBorg July 17, 2012 at 8:05 pm

Yes and no. It won't make any difference to those of us who follow politics, on left or right, because we ALL know this has been coming since Obama first threw his hat into the ring. Yes, because no matter how many nutbags and teabaggers this country produces, the vast majority of Americans are pretty decent folk, who would like to believe that such things don't happen. They like to close their eyes to the dark underbelly, to the long and tragic history of racism and misogyny and bungled foreign policy, they work hard and buy the kids whatever they want, and pay no attention to troublemakers till they get in trouble.

THOSE people have been shocked and horrified by the teabaggers and the strong streak of racism among their wingnut fellow-citizens. And they will PLOTZ when this happens live on the national media. Fucking PLOTZ.

actor212 July 18, 2012 at 9:20 am

Carman? I'm so liberal, I'd Godolphin if I could.

MittBorg July 18, 2012 at 2:21 pm

No teevee.

MittBorg July 18, 2012 at 2:24 pm

Actually, it ended with Sununu apologizing AGAIN, which is pretty fucking pathetic.

Romney's already lost this, barring something truly hideous in the Obama camp. He keeps trying to change the subject, but sabotaging himself so that nothing gains traction. It's like watching a worm wriggling on a hook. Fascinating, but sickening, too.

MittBorg July 18, 2012 at 3:46 pm

Just ONE LOUSY FUCKING TIME, man. Just that ONE time.

I was reading, and enjoying, this, this morning: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2174410/P

Now, Jordon shows great potential as a Wonketteer. The Snark is STRONG in this one.

Chet Kincaid July 18, 2012 at 3:49 pm

Oh, that looks very good, thanks!!

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