LORD AND MASTER OF FAPPERY  2:01 pm July 13, 2012

David Brooks Comforts Rich People

by Kris E. Benson

I got mineIf you LOVED David Brooks’ last column, wherein he blamed massive income inequality on slutty poors who do not read “Goodnight Moon” to their ugly, lazy, and disrespectful children (no rly), you’ll REALLY LOVE his latest column! In THIS column, he  concludes that elites (like him) are rich (again, like him) because they just deserve it, and they’re only corrupt because they are blind to the glory of their brilliance and as such, are unable to appreciate the gravity of their decisionmaking. If only they would just act like their racist, sexist, anti-Semitic predecessors (no rly!) everything will be FINE, the END.

Via the New York Times:

Christopher Hayes of MSNBC and The Nation believes that [income inequality] is inherent in the nature of meritocracies. In his book, “Twilight of the Elites,” he argues that meritocratic elites may rise on the basis of grades, effort and merit, but, to preserve their status, they become corrupt. They create wildly unequal societies, and then they rig things so that few can climb the ladders behind them. Meritocracy leads to oligarchy…

It’s a challenging argument but wrong. I’d say today’s meritocratic elites achieve and preserve their status not mainly by being corrupt but mainly by being ambitious and disciplined. They raise their kids in organized families. They spend enormous amounts of money and time on enrichment. They work much longer hours than people down the income scale, driving their kids to piano lessons and then taking part in conference calls from the waiting room.

See, if only poor people would spend enormous amount of money and time on enrichment, they would be rich and successful—like the rich and successful elites, who got that way by spending enormous amounts of time and money on enrichment. This is simple math! See also: if you work hard, you’ll be successful, therefore, people who are successful must have worked hard.

The corruption that has now crept into the world of finance and the other professions is not endemic to meritocracy but to the specific culture of our meritocracy. The problem is that today’s meritocratic elites cannot admit to themselves that they are elites.

(Note: David Brooks does not suffer from this particular ailment.)

As a result, today’s elite lacks the self-conscious leadership ethos that the racist, sexist and anti-Semitic old boys’ network did possess. If you went to Groton a century ago, you knew you were privileged. You were taught how morally precarious privilege was and how much responsibility it entailed. You were housed in a spartan 6-foot-by-9-foot cubicle to prepare you for the rigors of leadership. […]

Today’s elite is more talented and open but lacks a self-conscious leadership code. …If you read the e-mails from the Libor scandal you get the same sensation you get from reading the e-mails in so many recent scandals: these people are brats; they have no sense that they are guardians for an institution the world depends on; they have no consciousness of their larger social role.

The difference between the Hayes view and mine is a bit like the difference between the French Revolution and the American Revolution. He wants to upend the social order. I want to keep the current social order, but I want to give it a different ethos and institutions that are more consistent with its existing ideals.

To be fair, if I churned out this kind of drivel a few times a week and had a four million dollar house to show for it, I’d probably want to keep the existing social order as well. So maybe David Brooks isn’t QUITE as stupid as his columns indicate. But yeah, totally. No need to regulate these elites; just TELL them how important they are, and how many Poors are affected by their decisions, and surely they’ll start acting with the magnanimity of their racist, sexist, anti-Semitic predecessors—now THEY had a moral code, amiright?

[New York Times]

 

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{ 177 comments }

Chill_Bill July 13, 2012 at 2:03 pm

I thought we got rid of this guy! The fucker is just like herpes…

HogeyeGrex July 13, 2012 at 2:53 pm

I wish he was just like herpes.

Herpes can't type.

Chill_Bill July 13, 2012 at 3:14 pm

I herpes could type, they would be more coherent that Mr.Brooks.

CalamityJames July 13, 2012 at 6:56 pm

I'll go ahead and represent my herpetic brethren on this one. I'm glad that I only have to deal with herpes and not this megalo-fuck-wad.

va_real July 13, 2012 at 2:04 pm

Ah, the ephemeral Mr. Brooks. We'll see how long you last this time.

Goonemeritus July 13, 2012 at 2:04 pm

I have got to start drinking less I’m starting to get Flash Backs.

va_real July 13, 2012 at 2:05 pm

It's déjà lu all over again…

Nothingisamiss July 13, 2012 at 3:24 pm

What's funny is that my first thought was that I needed to start drinking more.

starfanglednut July 13, 2012 at 2:05 pm

As someone who spent years working 40-60 hours a week for minimum wage with no benefits, and still couldn't pay the bills, I feel entitled to tell mr Brooks to shut the fuck up.

GhostBuggy July 13, 2012 at 2:21 pm

Yes, yes, but did you drive your child to piano practice? Hm? HMM?!

flamingpdog July 13, 2012 at 2:26 pm

I've got the feeling that the only thing Mel David Brooks ever drove his children to was drink.

GhostBuggy July 13, 2012 at 2:32 pm

Meritocracy? What's a meritocracy? That thing you shouldn't oughtta do, but you do anyway.

sezme July 14, 2012 at 10:30 am

Piano practice doesn't count unless you do conference calls in the waiting room.

freakishlywrong July 13, 2012 at 2:05 pm

When can we eat them? He's first.

actor212 July 13, 2012 at 2:16 pm

Do you mind buckshot in your meal? It provides iron, if that helps.

actor212 July 13, 2012 at 2:05 pm

Hey, Brooksie?

if life was based on what we deserved, I'd be your fucking God, shithead.

Kneel before me….GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY ZIPPER!

Goonemeritus July 13, 2012 at 2:06 pm

If only David Brooks hadn’t grown up with such stifling privilege he might not have become the empathy deficient douche-bag we know today.

ChernobylSoup July 13, 2012 at 2:06 pm

Shorter Brooks: The only thing the Robber Barons ever did wrong was not let undesirables in the country club. The only thing the current crop of elites do wrong is not realize they have the power to exclude undesirables from the country club.

actor212 July 13, 2012 at 2:06 pm

It’s a challenging argument but wrong. I’d say today’s meritocratic elites achieve and preserve their status not mainly by being corrupt but mainly by being ambitious and disciplined.

Ronald Reagan's father was an alcoholic laborer.

George W Bush's GRANDfather was a Senator.

QED

flamingpdog July 13, 2012 at 2:28 pm

and a Nazi sympathizer.

actor212 July 13, 2012 at 2:48 pm

That's his excuse for meritocracy.

horsedreamer_1 July 13, 2012 at 4:52 pm

Going Galton!

FNMA July 13, 2012 at 2:07 pm

To paraphrase Kent Brockman, I, for one, welcome our new dickhead overlords.

actor212 July 13, 2012 at 2:08 pm

Only so I can kick them in the nards.

Callyson July 13, 2012 at 2:19 pm

Maybe that's what Brooksie has wanted all along…

(Now, that's the best explanation for David Brooks' drivel I've seen in a while…)

rickmaci July 13, 2012 at 2:07 pm

I'm confused. Isn't Groton a company that makes fish sticks and shit?

flamingpdog July 13, 2012 at 2:29 pm

Soylent fish is blah peoplez.

Allmighty_Manos July 13, 2012 at 2:31 pm

Trust the Groton's fisherman. David Brooks remedy for class inequality.

jodyleek July 13, 2012 at 2:38 pm

Fish sticks and shit –
What is "The Taste Left in My Mouth After Reading a David Brooks Article"?, Alex.

Dudleydidwrong July 13, 2012 at 3:22 pm

Fish DICKS! That's what Groton makes and that's what Brooks should eat.

hagajim July 13, 2012 at 2:07 pm

Fuck me!

Nostrildamus July 13, 2012 at 2:07 pm

In my browser, Brooks is looking leeringly at naked, Asian car lady. No doubt thinking "Boy, she'd look hot in a Milton Friedman mask!"

JohnyEdge July 13, 2012 at 2:34 pm

You must be more disciplined and work harder than me, because in my browser he's only leering at Ben & Jerry's.

CapnRadio July 13, 2012 at 2:07 pm

Fool me into commenting on a Brooks post once, Wonkette, shame on you. Fool me twice . . . aw, dammit.

starfanglednut July 13, 2012 at 2:13 pm

We won't get fooled again!

Lascauxcaveman July 13, 2012 at 2:17 pm

Commenting is not allowed on Wonkette.

Monsieur_Grumpe July 13, 2012 at 2:08 pm

He sure writes purty. Too bad it smells just like what it is…BS.

Lascauxcaveman July 13, 2012 at 2:25 pm

His mellifluous piffle would make him millions in insurance or mutual fund sales.

edgydrifter July 13, 2012 at 2:08 pm

Shorter Brooks: Elites spend enormous amounts of time and money (not necessarily their own) rigging the system to preserve their enormous surpluses of time and money. And this is good.

Naked_Bunny July 13, 2012 at 4:23 pm

I notice that, aside from his preposterous assertion that rich people work hundreds of times harder than poor people because they drive their kids to piano lessons and spend a lot of time talking to other rich people, Brooks forgot to refute the idea that the powerful rig the system to prevent others from becoming powerful.

Blunderthing July 13, 2012 at 2:09 pm

I'll say this for them: When they get caught with their hands in the cookie jar, they do a mighty fine job of saying the jar is to blame.

Lascauxcaveman July 13, 2012 at 2:29 pm

That's covered in your freshman year at Groton. Usually scheduled between Latin and Lacrosse practice.

freakishlywrong July 13, 2012 at 2:09 pm

The difference between the Hayes view and mine ..is that Chris Hayes actually has a well researched and thoughtful point of view and I'm just an oily tool.

actor212 July 13, 2012 at 2:11 pm

He's not oily. That would imply lubrication. He takes it raw.

GuyClinch July 13, 2012 at 2:36 pm

I read that as "oily stool", which is also deeply unpleasant. Goddam Olestra(TM)!

va_real July 13, 2012 at 2:10 pm

"They work much longer hours than people down the income scale, driving their kids to piano lessons and then taking part in conference calls from the waiting room."

Fucking morans missed the part about working smarter, not harder, apparently.

flamingpdog July 13, 2012 at 2:32 pm

Working smarter, not harder = twice the work for the same pay. Applies only to the poorz and the middle class*.

*not that there's all that much difference between the two these days.

Oblios_Cap July 13, 2012 at 2:41 pm

Those bastards only work at being assholes.

NellCote71 July 13, 2012 at 2:44 pm

And wimmenz. Don't forget us, who are still working for 76 cents for every male dollar. Or something like that.

actor212 July 13, 2012 at 2:10 pm

You were housed in a spartan 6-foot-by-9-foot cubicle to prepare you for the rigors of leadership.

By this motherfucking logic, you motherfucking elitist prick, the homeless Iraqi corporal living in a refrigerator box ought to be a motherfucking captain of motherfucking industry, you motherfucking bastard.

larrykat July 13, 2012 at 2:31 pm

Wait, you forgot "mother fucker"… oh I guess you didn't.

Lascauxcaveman July 13, 2012 at 2:32 pm

{BZZZZZZZP}

Sorry, five points deducted for using the word 'logic' in regards to a David Brooks post.

flamingpdog July 13, 2012 at 2:41 pm

Being housed in a spartan 6-foot-by-9-foot cubicle to prepare you for the rigors of leadership?

How does that prepare you for the rigors of operating in a 60-foot-by-90-foot, real wood paneled executive office with wet bar, 60" flat screen TV, mahogany desk the size of a pickup truck, and a closet-full of sexetaries? The only reason those douchebags are housed in six by nine foot cubicles in prep school and college is because the schoolmasters are fucking sadistic sociopaths who get orgasmic over the thought of degrading others, including the chilluns of teh rich!

actor212 July 13, 2012 at 2:47 pm

Bing-motherfucking-o!

James Michael Curley July 13, 2012 at 9:03 pm

Don't forget sodomy and the lash. All captains of industry were raised with sodomy and the lash at those private (public for you brits) schools.

Dudleydidwrong July 13, 2012 at 3:27 pm

Too bad we can't see how a 7-foot by 3-foot box might prepare Brooks for "the rigors of (mortis) leadership." Smaller is better, huh Brooks?

Nothingisamiss July 13, 2012 at 3:28 pm

Did you just call him a motherfucker? Because he motherfucking deserves it. What a motherfucker.

BarackMyWorld July 13, 2012 at 4:07 pm

Wait…hold up…

I'm still not sure I understand what the 6 by 9 ft. cubicle he's referring to is.

Also…everything else.

James Michael Curley July 13, 2012 at 9:05 pm

That's because if it was 6 by 9 it wouldn't be a cubicle. Maybe a retangicle, or if the there were no right angles a pararllelagramicle.

BoatOfVelociraptors July 13, 2012 at 5:04 pm

So when Bernie Madoff gets out of prison, he's going to be able to lead like a billionaire!

Chet Kincaid July 13, 2012 at 10:22 pm

Does Groton give you Leather Battle Panties, too?

ManchuCandidate July 13, 2012 at 2:10 pm

Soon to be released by hero of the eelights, David Brooks, a digital album of songs from the class war that doesn't exist if poor people mention it.

"Songs to Burn Benjamins To"

Included are such hits as:
"I'm Leaving on MY Jet Plane"
"Money"
"Poor People Have No Reason To Live."
and
"I'll Take Your Job and Shove It (to India.)"

actor212 July 13, 2012 at 2:12 pm

"Comfortably Dumb"

mrpuma2u July 13, 2012 at 2:36 pm

Don't forget that smash from ELO (elitist light orchestra) "Sweet talkin' broker"

flamingpdog July 13, 2012 at 2:44 pm

"Riders on the Poor".

NellCote71 July 13, 2012 at 2:45 pm

House of the Rising Sums.

Chet Kincaid July 13, 2012 at 10:24 pm

Somebody's rollin' today!

edgydrifter July 13, 2012 at 2:10 pm

You, too, could be a millionaire if you made your kids learn to play the piano and talked on the phone in public places and already had a million dollars in the bank.

jodyleek July 13, 2012 at 2:33 pm

How to become a millionaire: First, get a million dollars.

Oblios_Cap July 13, 2012 at 2:41 pm

lucky sperm!

Lascauxcaveman July 13, 2012 at 2:34 pm

I'm kinda wondering what kind of millionaire piano teacher has a "waiting room." When my kid's at piano, I'm waiting in 1993 Subaru wagon.

Jus_Wonderin July 13, 2012 at 2:11 pm

!em pleH

ChernobylSoup July 13, 2012 at 2:26 pm

Ha!

Callyson July 13, 2012 at 2:11 pm

He's BAAAACK…

MissTaken July 13, 2012 at 2:11 pm

This is why I hate diarrhea. Right when you think it's over it comes back with a vengeance.

Extemporanus July 13, 2012 at 2:25 pm

SHITS or GTFO!!

Callyson July 13, 2012 at 2:12 pm

…today’s meritocratic elites…spend enormous amounts of money and time on enrichment.

So, the elites are elite because they have money and time to spend. Thanks for clearing that mystery up…

Asshole.

BlueStateLibel July 13, 2012 at 2:13 pm

The only good thing about David Brooks' columns are the comments telling him to piss off and die.

Hammiepants July 13, 2012 at 2:13 pm

Cutting right to the chase, I would like to slap this douchecopter in the face. With a shovel.

fartknocker July 13, 2012 at 2:14 pm

Aww David, your so cute, coining the new word meritocracy so you can attempt to make your goofy theory legitimate. I'm so happy you thought of a particular word that permits you the ability to hang out with the elites in the Hamptons licking the sweat of Romney's nut sack. Shit stain.

Antispandex July 13, 2012 at 2:15 pm

You know, the Federalists tried the same argument (that some people were just BORN better and more fit for wealth and power). You may have notice there is not a Federalist Party anymore. Dare we hope?

randcoolcatdaddy July 13, 2012 at 2:15 pm

Yes, David, you miss the good old days at the last turn of the century great Robber Barons – yes, we get it.

Since you can't afford a little time machine, even with your great wealth, I'd suggest you deal with the present day reality that we plan on eating rich pricks like yourself for dinner and picking our teeth with your feeble little bones as an aperitif. So, yes, David, go fuck yourself.

AbandonHope July 13, 2012 at 3:37 pm

I don't know, they seem like they'd be all stringy gristle. On the other hand, biomass is becoming a very popular, clean, and efficient fuel source.

Callyson July 13, 2012 at 2:16 pm

today’s elite lacks the self-conscious leadership ethos that the racist, sexist and anti-Semitic old boys’ network did possess. If you went to Groton a century ago, you knew you were privileged. You were taught how morally precarious privilege was and how much responsibility it entailed. You were housed in a spartan 6-foot-by-9-foot cubicle to prepare you for the rigors of leadership

And this self – conscious leadership by the elites a century ago led to them exercising social responsibility by doing…um, er, they must have done something…

DustBowlBlues July 13, 2012 at 3:29 pm

Building libraries when they were old and had worked a lot of miserable people to death so they could afford to do it.

My husband taught our little girl to spit on Carnegie libraries.

SexySmurf July 13, 2012 at 2:16 pm

If America was truly a meritocracy David Brooks would be working at Arby's.

Not McDonald's, Arby's.

widestanceromance July 13, 2012 at 2:31 pm

Attached to a rest stop on I-95, as a Mopping Associate.

Nothingisamiss July 13, 2012 at 3:32 pm

And in trouble with the female manager.

horsedreamer_1 July 13, 2012 at 4:56 pm

He wants to tell her to eff off & quit, but can't, because he's banging that girl on the fryolator. They say she's retar*ed, but those titties ain't re*arded.

H/t Dave Attell

Rotundo_ July 13, 2012 at 6:58 pm

Cleaning crew in a hog slaughtering operation.

poorgradstudent July 13, 2012 at 2:17 pm

"They work much longer hours than people down the income scale, driving their kids to piano lessons and then taking part in conference calls from the waiting room."

My God, my friend who worked full-time and went to school full-time for years must be lying when she says she's in massive student loan debt and not a millionaire.

mrpuma2u July 13, 2012 at 2:33 pm

But did she take piano?

BoatOfVelociraptors July 13, 2012 at 5:18 pm

Driving people around is hard work. It's why cabbies are so rich that Tom Friedman goes to THEM for advice.

bobbert July 15, 2012 at 12:14 pm

Now. that is a quality bit of side-snark.

An_Outhouse July 13, 2012 at 2:19 pm

I thought reading “Goodnight Moon” to the childrenz is what made them ugly, lazy, and disrespectful. I can't keep the rules straight. Its like one week bacon is an anti-oxidant and the next week its not good for you.

DustBowlBlues July 13, 2012 at 3:30 pm

Let me know when it becomes an anti-oxidant again.

Nothingisamiss July 13, 2012 at 3:33 pm

Are you trying to get me to believe that bacon's not good for me? I've heard that it has antioxidants and fiber. I read it inon the internet so it must be true.

Jus_Wonderin July 13, 2012 at 2:19 pm

Sometimes, when I hear this type of argument I am reminded of what ants think of humans. I mean, we tower over them. We can crush them without a thought. We could lay waste to their tiny secure homes.

So, if rich people are "better" than the poor. Are the Gates and Buffets of the world better than the lower rich classes??????????

Dashboard Buddha July 13, 2012 at 2:19 pm

"these people are brats; they have no sense that they are guardians for an institution the world depends on"

So, in other words the enormous amount of money, time, and effort spent on enrichment was wasted?

Also this..

"driving their kids to piano lessons"

You mean having their driver drive the kids to piano lessons?

FNMA July 13, 2012 at 2:19 pm

Next week, David Brooks will explain how we can once again have a robust economy by emulating the values espoused by southern landowners in the 1850s, a time when the elites knew they were elite and the Negroes knew their place.

horsedreamer_1 July 13, 2012 at 4:58 pm

Today, we are all Pullman porters.

UnholyMoses July 13, 2012 at 2:20 pm

Shorter rich prick: Rich pricks need to be told how rich they are so they'll stop being pricks.

GlowneyHouse July 13, 2012 at 10:37 pm

If only the Kardashians felt empowered… think of all the good they could do.

MiniMencken July 13, 2012 at 2:21 pm

Meritocratic elites? Has Brooksie ever been to a charity ball with $25,000 tables and listened to what passes for conversation around one of them? Dubya was President because of his merit? Really? How about luck? That have anything do do with being a millionaire? Maybe just a teensie bit?

jodyleek July 13, 2012 at 2:31 pm

Richie Rich sperm goes into Debutante egg, Trust Fund baby pops out. Who can explain it?

CrunchyKnee July 13, 2012 at 2:22 pm

My crack dealing neighbor works hard, shit, he's always working, yet he lives in a cardboard box down by the river just like me. Help us, Brookes, we just aren't doing it right!

rocktonsam July 13, 2012 at 2:22 pm

which cabinet position in the Rmoney administration does he want? There is a huge line for douche bag czar probably

actor212 July 13, 2012 at 2:23 pm

David Brooks has a face you just want to punch.

Dashboard Buddha July 13, 2012 at 2:24 pm

If long hours and hard work are the best pathway to wealth, then why isn't that African lady rich?

UnholyMoses July 13, 2012 at 2:30 pm

" … why isn't that African lady rich?"

You answered your own question.

Beowoof July 13, 2012 at 2:26 pm

I am a supporter of Brooks, Friedman and the editorial crew at the NYT. They provide so much fodder for Wonkette and others such as Taibbi to make fun of them.

FNMA July 13, 2012 at 2:31 pm

Head over to Charlie Pierce's blog. He has an enormous amount of fun slapping Brooks around.

Beowoof July 14, 2012 at 1:40 am

I thoroughly enjoy Charlie slapping the shit out of Brooks, amongst others.

Rotundo_ July 13, 2012 at 7:03 pm

If it wasn't for Krugman they would be on a glide path to the WaPo level and sinking rapidly.

mrpuma2u July 13, 2012 at 2:27 pm

What a clueless douchebag! Hey Brooks brothers is all i wear Brooks, most of these lower class people who you are maligning for not being rich like you, are worried about paying their bills each month, not paying for piano lessons.

TootsStansbury July 13, 2012 at 2:27 pm

Well! I'm glad I can rest easy now! It's that simple; time, money, piano lessons, money and being born into privilege! Rmoney 2012!

ASHLEIGH_Joe July 13, 2012 at 2:29 pm

I’d say today’s meritocratic elites achieve and preserve their status not mainly by being corrupt but mainly by being ambitious and disciplined.

For context, here's another headline of the day: JP Morgan says Trading Loss Grew to 4.4 Billion, from Previous Estimates 2 Billion

Those disciplined meritocratic elites.

imissopus July 13, 2012 at 3:19 pm

If only those traders had understood how important they are, this never would have happened!

fuflans July 13, 2012 at 4:12 pm

if feels like obama's entire presidency has been like this – and like living in an alternate reality.

the cold hard facts are there in black and white and often read all over and RIGHT next to them you get some bozo like boehner or cantor or david brooks spouting some meaningless talking point that is directly contradicted by what is right there. in black and white and read all over.

and we're in a close election contest. the mind reels.

larrykat July 13, 2012 at 2:29 pm

Basically he wants rich people to keep being assholes but to realize they are IMPORTANT assholes… is that about it?

bonghitforjesus July 13, 2012 at 2:30 pm

Whither noblesse oblige?

Oblios_Cap July 13, 2012 at 2:36 pm

What social contract?

larrykat July 13, 2012 at 2:43 pm

I suppose we have to pronounce that "the French way", huh elitist scum?

imissopus July 13, 2012 at 3:16 pm

SOUNDS FURRIN'.

sati_demise July 13, 2012 at 6:03 pm

It died with Teddy Roosevelt.

Oblios_Cap July 13, 2012 at 2:30 pm

Not this asswipe again?

actor212 July 13, 2012 at 2:33 pm

I really want to take this bastard on a bike ride with me through Brooklyn. I ride at the crack of dawn. The neighborhoods that most worry me are the working class neighborhoods, like Sunset Park. There, people are up early. Hispanics, blacks, Asians. They open shops, they walk to the subway, they scoot across streets to catch a bus…on a Sunday. At dawn. I'm terrified because they grab car services if they can afford them, or have headphones on, and cross in front of me, hustling to one of their three or four jobs.

The neighborhoods where I can sit up and relax? The white, middle and upper middle class ones, where I know I have until at least 9AM before Dad throws an old pair of PJs on to drive the two blocks to the bagel shop.

Fuck you, Brooksie. Just fuck you.

AbandonHope July 13, 2012 at 3:30 pm

Oh, but you see, they're not doing the right kind of work. The kind where you're a fucktard drivel-spewing commentator or a sleazy money huckster.

widestanceromance July 13, 2012 at 2:34 pm

"A chattering class hero is something to be. . ."

Oblios_Cap July 13, 2012 at 2:44 pm

The rich are the women of the world.

mavenmaven July 13, 2012 at 2:36 pm

I don't care. I'm reposting my comment to the mysterious disappearing previous Brooks piece because I'm not some kind of blue blooded WASPy elitist but rather a mongrel with foreign parents:

…If you are born to high school grads, your odds are terrible…

So does that mean if you are born to immigrant or refugee parents from non-English speaking countries, your chance of getting into Stanford is zero? Um, apparently not.
I call this whole article bs ( 헛소리 )

Dildeaux July 13, 2012 at 2:36 pm

Dild believes Bobo's writing, not unlike the post-truth, faux-empire in which he resides, is well past its apex. One dreams of a day when Bobo's posh lair is overrun by filthy hippie OWS hoardes, smashing crystal vases and liberating the impoverished handmaidens and footmen.

Allmighty_Manos July 13, 2012 at 2:36 pm

If starving people just ate more food, than starvation wouldn't be a problem would it?

flamingpdog July 13, 2012 at 2:37 pm

Yeah, really now. The rich, they put in 60 hours a week at the office, while the poorz only put in 20 hours. At each of the three minimum-wage jobs they have in order to survive.

Estproph July 13, 2012 at 2:38 pm

I guess SOMEONE has to keep making the stuff to line America's birdcages…

johnnyzhivago July 13, 2012 at 2:43 pm

Lower income type people shouldn't even be reading Mr. Brook's column, I mean how could they be expected to understand it.

BenGleck July 13, 2012 at 2:43 pm

Those eyes! What is he on?

grex1949 July 13, 2012 at 2:44 pm

Let's see if I've got this right. 21st Century America is NOT a class-based society. Opportunity is out there for everyone who is willing to work for it. But rich parents, because they have the resources, invest more money in their children, giving the rich kids a leg up on the poor kids, whose parents don't have the money, or time, to invest in their kids because they are busy making rice and beans for dinner, if they can afford it. Rich kids, born on third base believing they hit a triple to get there, want to preserve their "fragile" hold on economic power by any means available. Daddy's trust funds can be used for that purpose. Poor kids (who never even heard of "Goodnight Moon", fercrissakes) have no trust funds to rescue them from abject poverty and little, if any, opportunity to seek higher education without committing to indentured servitude for the remainder of their natural lives.
And this describes a meritocracy? Are you shitting me or am I missing something really important?

AbandonHope July 13, 2012 at 3:36 pm

And here people have been saying "money equals speech"; I didn't realize money equals merit too.

sati_demise July 13, 2012 at 6:06 pm

well there you go then, the Multinational media masters agree.

C_R_Eature July 13, 2012 at 2:53 pm

Good God, he's back! What Witchery is this?

spends2much July 13, 2012 at 2:54 pm

If I didn't have such awesome hair, I would be TEARING IT OUT in anger at reading this guy! He is a parody or himself, right??
You think that you, DAVE, work "much longer hours" coming up with this DRIVEL than some struggling wage slave with 3 jobs and no benefits??
Honestly, he shits this stuff out and gets paid for it. I would rather Jamie Dimon take home a billion dollars a year than David Brooks continue cashing paycheques.

Maman July 13, 2012 at 3:04 pm

Have I ever mentioned that Brooks was my husband's boss in college?

fuflans July 13, 2012 at 4:13 pm

wha?!?!?!

Maman July 13, 2012 at 4:16 pm

They both worked at Fred. The coffee shop in Shoreland at UofC

fuflans July 13, 2012 at 4:24 pm

ahh dear departed shoreland…

i went to chicago but after david the wonder elite. one of my best friends was there with him however. to this day, one of my favorite things to do is to get him going on 'david brooks and his mediocrity: then and now.'

Maman July 13, 2012 at 8:52 pm

I was Dewey house 1988. How about you?

iburl July 13, 2012 at 3:17 pm

The fact that he says "taking part in conference calls" is evidence of hard work is really just about all you need to know about the oilgarchy.

Nothingisamiss July 13, 2012 at 3:21 pm

Fucking prick who works less hours and in a less stressful envrionment than I do says what?

Honest to God I hate this douchebag and all the others who share his morally repugnant beliefs. I need some good news (or better meds) to get my snark on.

imissopus July 13, 2012 at 3:22 pm

Once again I want to call my friend who considers Brooks and Shields heroes for being "civil in an uncivil era" and whack her with a rolled-up copy of the NYT.

archikvetch July 13, 2012 at 3:23 pm

Does this explain the difference between "Last Days of Disco" and Bertie Wooster? I think not!

AbandonHope July 13, 2012 at 3:29 pm

Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait a minute, this is the David Brooks that NPR has on every week with E.J. Dionne to discuss issues? This is the guy? I had absolutely no idea.

Yeah, not going to donate to NPR again until they drop this shitbag permanently.

DustBowlBlues July 13, 2012 at 3:35 pm

Speaking of the French Revolution: I happen to be reading the book that this douche is bashing. He calls Hayes a Jacobin, while Brooks knows the good old days were those of noblesse oblige. (don't have time to look up spelling).

Dudleydidwrong July 13, 2012 at 3:39 pm

It is so nice, Brooks, that you have the job of writing an apology (using the word in its classic sense) of your job that allows you to write about what's wrong with all the others who don't have jobs like yours. It is so nice to be born fucking superior and be able to tell everyone about it. Dingleberry!

DustBowlBlues July 13, 2012 at 3:40 pm

Or like the lady said at the Romney cashapaloozas held in the Hamptons: those people just don't understand how things work, so they vote wrong.

Excuse me for being arcane here, but wasn't this the same theory that made the Crimean War such a major fuckup for the Brits? Because the "better people" were making the decisions. (And creating new fashions in sweaters).

AncienReggie July 13, 2012 at 3:47 pm

I never cease to marvel that David Brooks get paid, PAID for shit like this.

Naked_Bunny July 13, 2012 at 4:27 pm

He refutes his own argument, really.

fuflans July 13, 2012 at 4:17 pm

If you went to Groton a century ago, you knew you were privileged

Please. if you go to Groton now, you know you are privileged.

Naked_Bunny July 13, 2012 at 4:26 pm

As a computer programmer, I probably get paid more than the contractors who are rebuilding my office building around me as I sit as my desk commenting on Wonkette. But I don't for a second pretend that I'm smarter or working harder than they are, much less sneer at their efforts.

AddHomonym July 13, 2012 at 4:44 pm

"these people are brats; they have no sense that they are guardians for an institution the world depends on"
 
That’s called PURSUIT OF HAPPINESS bitchez!  Freedom!  BOOM!

horsedreamer_1 July 13, 2012 at 5:00 pm

Chris Hayes, in response, said, "Gotta get up to get… Get down. The NY Times op-Ed page is a joke in my town".

DemonicRage July 13, 2012 at 5:03 pm

I actually read this column in the paper this morning and, aside from a free ad for Chris Hayes' book, I thought that the point of the article was to say, over and over again, that rich people hire tutors for their generally dumbass kids, so that kids of the wealthy take all the places in the best schools.

docterry6973 July 13, 2012 at 5:09 pm

Housed in spartan 6 by 9 cubicles? Regular self-flagellation or STFU.

BoatOfVelociraptors July 13, 2012 at 5:11 pm

Nothing says "Hard Work and Leadership" like having a meeting on the company card and colluding to falsify reports.

The whole Libor thing. Remember? http://www.theatlantic.com/business/archive/2012/

JackObin July 13, 2012 at 5:22 pm

I'll bet Little Georgie Bush can't spell elite. By the way, congratulations to elite universities Yale and Harvard for granting degrees to that illiterate twerp.

sati_demise July 13, 2012 at 6:02 pm

Does he even know the people he is talking about? The elite families I knew consisted of the kids being in rehab by 16 and adultery, the list is too long…..

TribecaMike July 13, 2012 at 6:29 pm

Another day, another boring self-contented Burkeian.

Not_So_Much July 13, 2012 at 6:58 pm

I was just going to observe what a complete douche he was, but a quick search of the page on "douche" and it looks like we got him covered. (what a douche)

Slim_Pickins July 13, 2012 at 7:33 pm

We shall overcome, so that the meritocracy of brats, for brats, and by brats will not perish from this earth.

I thought the NY Times was known for adult supervision.

Jukesgrrl July 13, 2012 at 8:20 pm

I can't even begin to imagine what David Brooks was thinking when he recently wasted a seat at a Bruce Springsteen concert (in Spain, I guess he was afraid to show his face at one closer to home) and listened to lyrics like, "The banker man grows fatter, the working man grows thin/ It's all happened before and it'll happen again/ It'll happen again, THEY'LL bet YOUR life."

Maybe he thought it was patriotic, same as that wonderful Springsteen anthem Born in the USA. Or maybe he thought, "His daughter rides show-jumping horses, so he's just like me." But Dave, somehow I don't think that Bruce's secretary-mother taking out a loan to buy him a $60 guitar (after he had learned on an $18 guitar) is the same as plutocrats driving their kids to piano lessons.

swordfis July 13, 2012 at 8:39 pm

As much as I fervently support universal higher education, I think it was a mistake to teach Brooks to read.

Preacher_Griz July 13, 2012 at 8:51 pm

David Brooks is rooting out the freeloaders who are destroying this Dominion!!!!

Chet Kincaid July 13, 2012 at 10:19 pm

At Groton, people with no money are called "Muggles."

valmach July 14, 2012 at 1:01 am

That piece of shit up there, I never liked him, I never trusted him. For all I know he had me set up and had my friend Angel Fernandez killed…

valthemus July 14, 2012 at 3:40 am

Get David some knee pads. The man has much rich dick to suck if he's gonna keep up with the maintenance costs for his house.

usuhname July 14, 2012 at 11:57 am

This guys a gem. Hold him tight, America, and never let him go.

fuflans July 13, 2012 at 11:16 pm

upper wallace 86!

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