funny people on the videocamera

Watch Florida’s AG Also Learn of the Wrong Health Care Ruling

This is not quite a Schimdtgasm… but then again, what is comparable to the funniest video of the year? Here’s Florida AG Pam Bondi, a lead plaintiff behind the health care reform case and, in general, one of America’s worst public officials, first hearing that the individual mandate was struck down. Gov. Bat Boy calls for a five-minute break, and everyone is all smiles! And then Bondi gets the real ruling, oops.

Here’s a much more thorough examination of what happens from the Miami New Times:

Bondi whispered to Scott about the news and shows him the iPad. We can’t tell for sure, but it sounds like Bondi says, “They struck it down.” Scott then calls for a five-minute break. Pam Bondi’s mouth turns up in a big smile. Scott then leans over the iPad and discusses it with Bondi. Scott, along with CFO Jeff Atwater, head for the door, but Bondi stays behind. At one points Bondi says something to someone off camera something like, “It’s on CNN’s website.”

Then another man, Bondi’s chief-of-staff Carlos Muniz, bends over the iPad, smacks his hands against the dais, and presumably informs Bondi that indeed the mandate had not been struck down. Bondi asks, “What?”

Everyone involved in the production of this anecdote deserves a raise.

[Miami New Times via Tampa Bay Times]

About the author

Jim Newell is Wonkette's beloved Capitol Hill Typing Demon. He joined Wonkette.com in 2007, left for some other dumb job in 2010, and proudly returned in 2012 as our "Senior Editor at Large." He lives in Washington and also writes for things such as The Guardian, the Manchester paper of liberals.

View all articles by Jim Newell
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488 comments

    1. ChapterUndVerse

      It can be confusing interpreting Fox news. I know that I often don't recognize what country they are talking about when they explain what will happen if affordable health care is not repealed. I keep thinking this is Greece, or perhaps Namibia.

  1. Respitetini

    Best video ever. The palpable despair of knowing that all those poors' lives won't get ruined – at least not by death or high medical bills. This should be up for an oscar or emmy or something.

  2. Barb

    Sorry guys, John Roberts met with the Wizard of Oz, got a three-fer and we all lived happily ever after. (for a while)

      1. tessiee

        Phyllis Schlafly — not because she has anything to do with this specifically, but just because she looks so perfect for the part.

      1. James Michael Curley

        A secret society was convened a few years ago to visit her grave on every full moon to make sure.

        "The nuns were not just nuns; the nuns were political activists." Jean Kirkpatrick on the rape, mutilation, murder and burning of the bodies three American nuns and a Catholic lay worker in El Salvadior by the US supported regime in 1980. This statement was made after a UN Commission ruled that the ruling military junta had committed the murders. Also see the story of Oscar Romero, a catholic bishop who was shot in front of his parish while conducting mass.

    1. James Michael Curley

      With all the free well care exams which will be provided, I'm sure Scott thinks he will be eating beans soon.

  3. Boojum

    Is the concept of the hate fuck forbidden in the Wonkette lexicon? Because, well, just because.

    1. gogogodzilla

      I'd tap it. Though she would be responsible for her own orgasm. I believe in personal responsibility after all.

    2. crybabyboehner

      Hell no. The Wonkette empire was built on butt sex and hate fucks and trucknutz!

  4. Goonemeritus

    I have come to the conclusion that we need to spike the football way more. We need to be doing daily drive by taunting’s until every tea bagger in our fine nation packs up and moves to Somalia.

    1. Boojum

      Yes, this. Mock them, claim that this means it is here to stay, give up the stupid repeal idea, the Supreme Court has spoken! Let no facts get in the way of a good message, repeat until they believe. I sound like a Republican.

      1. MittBorg

        I know. It's scary, it's shocking, I hate to think I'm descending to their level, but just this once I don't want to get sidetracked on the issue of whether it is moral to use the tactics of others against them when you yourself (at least theoretically) deplore such tactics. Right now I want to DO something, anything at all, to tip the balance, to start this nation towards the first steps of being the wonderful place it can be, where all citizens are valued and cared for, at least to the extent of giving them basic access to healthcare if nothing else.

        1. Dashboard_Jesus

          well said MB, well said! *golf clap/ salutes*

          btw what I think is REALLY shocking is that so many of our fellow 'citizens' just HATE the idea of people having affordable health care when every other civilized country on the planet has some form of universal healthcare…after 20 years working on the business side of health care I've come to HATE these ignorant/ greedy/ selfish/ heartless bastards with the heat of a thousand suns…no matter how many times you try to explain it to the morons they can't seem to understand that covering EVERYONE under Medicare will save TRILLIONS of $$$ while making sure people don't die from not getting medical care when they need it…just proves my daddy's wise words, "Don't try arguing with a (Re)pig, it just frustrates you and irritates the (Re)pig"

          1. MittBorg

            Thanks, D_B.

            I can understand not wanting *other* people to have Nice Things. It's our basic xenophobia. But your own tribe? Basically, these people are *happy* about that idea that up to 30 million of their fellow-citizens, whose tax dollars support the economy, who contribute in their own way to making this a better place to live — should suffer and die in pain and agony because they might chance to develop a disease, as we ALL do at some time or another. They are willing to see 38 million, which includes old people, the disabled, little children, pregnant women, go without. I cannot begin to express my distaste for this heartlessness.

          2. Estproph

            Absolutely right. There is something seriously wrong with them. People who don't care one whit whether their lives are ruined just so long as them dam neegras don't get nuthin don't deserve any respect or consideration.

          3. Isyaignert

            You can't fix stupid – especially if they get their "news" from Fux, even when you tell them 45,000 people die every year because they can't afford to see a doctor. They. Don't. Fukking. Care.

          4. reliefsinn

            And if you find it hard to believe that someone would deny their fellow Americans health care, see O'Reilly's remark that though the poor would probably be able to receive health care through the bill, taxes would probably be raised on the middle class.
            So it's bad.
            As if the Nasty One cares about the middle class, or the taxes they pay.

      1. Goonemeritus

        It appears I’m too old and inflexible to moon anyone from the window of a speeding Chevy Cruze Eco. But I’m open to suggestion having just woken up from a nice nap.

          1. ChessieNefercat

            Whoops. Reading about mooning made me see "further teabaggery" as "further teabuggery."

          2. MittBorg

            Haha! It wouldn't surprise me in the least. Like Paul Babeu, those who squeal the loudest about an issue are usually the ones chin-deep in it.

          1. MittBorg

            tessiee, inamorata, I'm trying to figure out how a person fires those bullets at Wolf while mooning him.

            A man could blow his nuts off that way.

          2. MittBorg

            Don't give them any help, dear, they're bound to resent it. Nothing worse than a tetchy teabagger.

            Your kind words the other day, well. You know what I'm thinking in your general direction.

          3. MittBorg

            Gratefully received, and returned. I am amazed that, no matter how long you live, your ability to feel pain doesn't seem to diminish. But then again, on the other hand, neither does your capacity for bliss, I suppose.

      1. viennawoods13

        They found out we have a viable form of government and laws that would restrict their actions. So, no.

        1. Fare la Volpe

          It's such a shame that you guys have that whole "civic responsibility," "free healthcare," "general lack of explicit corruption" thing going on.

          Such a shame indeed.

      2. MittBorg

        The Canadians appear to be torn between laughing their asses off and waxing wroth that these dumbasses would dream that Canada would welcome them in the first place.

          1. MittBorg

            My heartfelt apologies. Just remember, most of them have never left their own hick town in their entire lives, so (a) they don't have a clue how to get there, and (b) chances are their xenophobic, paranoid, ignorant asses don't have a passport, either, or the first clue on how to get one; Also, too, they're probably traveling via Hoveround, which means it'll take them a while.

            Watch for the First Wave around, oh, 2018 or so.

          2. viennawoods13

            Well, by that time, our Dear Leader. should have achieved his goal of turning our country into a right-wing distopia, so they should feel right at home.

          3. MittBorg

            Look, we're counting on you to keep your wingnuts in line, nowutaimsain? We can't have *both* our countries racing breakneck to the bottom.

    1. NellCote71

      I love the smell of heads exploding in the morning, and the evening, and the whole lifelong day.

        1. RavenRant

          Wonkipedia?

          Also, Wankette – an online compilation of the most fap-worthy posts.

    1. NorthStarSpanx

      Maybe if she'd put her glasses on for the purposes of 'reading' then she wouldn't have badly informed her boss of the decision.

  5. TribecaMike

    Life is good.

    Unless you're a loser like this guy (and that hair flipper chick). Then it sucks. Which means it's good.

      1. TribecaMike

        "But I know what darkness is, it accumulates, thickens, then suddenly bursts and drowns everything." — Samuel Beckett, Malone Dies (one of the funniest books ever written)

    1. extreme_left

      I like how how hair flipper chick.. for a second I thought it was Ann Coulter wearing her human suit.. gazes seductively sucking on glasses at f(r)at boy but he's just too confused to even respond with his 'little' brain.

  6. edgydrifter

    As funny as these videos are, it is profoundly unsettling that so many people in America become physically aroused by the prospect of other people suffering. This whole country needs to be committed against its will.

      1. UW8316154

        No even countrymen, but how can a human rejoice at the thought of ANY sentient being suffering?

        1. MittBorg

          In all fairness, my friend, most of us have not yet evolved to the point where we can wish well on those who are not of our own tribe. Hopefully, someday we will learn that all that lives and breathes is one, no matter its many forms. I even dare to hope that I will live to see that day.

      2. starfanglednut

        They do it by breaking down their own tribe into smaller, inferior tribes, like blahs, gays and poor people. It's ok for those people to be denied healthcare.

        1. MittBorg

          And it never occurs to them that someone else is looking at them EXACTLY the same way they look at the "inferior" tribes around them?

          My mother thought Hitler was a great guy, regardless of how often I pointed out to her that she would be one of the first people he would send to the ovens. I guess I shouldn't hold these yobs to higher standards.

    1. Fairtackle

      I am starting to think they treat his more as a sports team sort of thing. People get soo worked up about their team winning, But it really has nothing to do with anything. I doubt they really think about the real world implications of this stuff. They repeat the nonsensical arguments that they hear and don't think about it because it is an abstraction. People argue about why their team is better even when it loses. It is all about their team winning. And they are fuckers.

      1. tessiee

        ^^^
        ^^
        ^
        Do yourselves a favor (this goes for everyone here), and don't even glance at the comments on the other sites about "handouts for lazy freeloaders", etc. Whenever I make the mistake of looking, I'm always appalled by how pig-fuckingly ignorant the other side is e.g., "the libs created this recession", to say nothing of their appalling lack of respect, e.g., "Michelle, your husband is a liar". Don't worry about sinking to their level. It's impossible.

        1. sewollef

          Agree. It make me angry [and upset] that there are people like this, who seem to generally enjoy the prospect of suffering.

      2. Negropolis

        Yes, but they are almost always on the side of greater suffering. I don't think that's a mistake; I think it's something kind of inherent to what modern American conservatism has become.

        It's why I'm a liberal. There is only one major ideology in this nation whose mission is to bring more folks into the fold that is America. Modern Americna conservatism mission seems to be the shrinking of America, carving it down into the smallest group of people possible, distilling it until there is nothing left but the wealthiest, most nationalist, most provincial people on the globe. It fears damn-near everything, and uses that paranoia for purification.

        I don't buy that they don't know the real world implications of supporting the party they do. Some of them are real world consequences of their party's policies.

        1. Fairtackle

          (sigh) I am afraid you are right there. I keep trying to figure out some vaguely rational reason for why they are the way they are. I have long (tortuous, miserable) email conversations with my teabagger uncle. Near as I can tell, there is nothing rational about it. There is an element of the "my team" thing going on but it is worse than that. Sort of a tribalism (like me good all else bad) meets mob mentality. Worse still, there does seem to be a hint that at some level they know they are full of shit and are almost gleeful about it.

          1. Negropolis

            I try to figure it out, myself. I have this theory that they understand what we all understand, and that is that they see just as everyone else does that the nation is declining. Some of them may know the real reasons and hide that they know it, and blame the decline on something else. Others truly don't know why and truly believe in the blame in which they place. But, what I think unifies them is the realization that we're sinking is the belief that the only way to save America is to throw everyone but themselves off the sinking ship. Whereas, I think liberals want to utilize the talents of everyone left on the boat to keep it from sinking, or at least realize that if we're going to go down, we're going to go down, together.

          2. sewollef

            I'm thinking a lot of it is a form of Stockholm Syndrome. That whole 'being in denial' that their policies are actually bad for people.

          3. Jukesgrrl

            And add to that the fact that most of them lack critical thinking skills and are completely incapable of applying logic to policy problems.

          4. Isyaignert

            Is your uncle a Foxbot like my brother? You cannot have an intelligent conversation when someone's facts are BS.

          5. Fairtackle

            He won't actually say where he gets his "information" from but he keeps forwarding emails in all caps that rely almost entirely on emotional arguments and appeals to authority. I told heim he needs to back up his assertions with facts and he sent me a link to a study that relied almost entirely on "data" from the Heritage Foundation.

            I honestly tried to understand where he was coming from but after months of exchanges came to the conclusion that it was not that I was not understanding so much as it did not make any sense.

          6. MittBorg

            That's the part that I resent. Not all these people are thick-as-a-brick stupid. Some of them, while not qualified to run a country, a company, or even an office, are intelligent enough to hold down jobs that directly affect my life.

          7. MittBorg

            I'm thinking of Couch Woman who managed to score disability for being a Fatty McFatass, while the rest of us picked up her workload. Then she got pregnant while out on disability, so she took maternity leave. Then she had to work at home because she had a kid.

        2. Dashboard_Jesus

          very insightful indeed my brotha, you pretty much summed up the whole sad sorry state of this nation right there

        3. Dashboard_Jesus

          …and the sad thing is that these 1% assholes are able to convince enough of the working stiff white morons to vote for the RICH guy who will lie and lie and lie to the morons when it's obvious (to any intelligent person) that the rich assholes really don't give a fuck about them at all

          1. Jukesgrrl

            I drove behind a dirty, obviously well-used pick up truck the other day that had a red,white, and blue bumper sticker readling: Working Americans Vote Republican.

            Seriously, how can you argue with people like that. They're brainwashed.

    2. Dashboard_Jesus

      "It is no measure of health to be well-adjusted to a profoundly sick society" ~ J. Krishnamurti

      And our Merkan 'society' today is as profoundly sick and dis-eased as one could imagine

      1. Butch_Wagstaff

        I would also say that a perfectly normal reaction to a sick society makes you start to think that you are sick yourself.
        Best to just trust doctors who will conveniently prescribed a pill that will dull your feelings, right?

    3. DemmeFatale

      Like I told my daughter in the 1st grade:
      "Democrats care about other people. They want everybody to be happy and healthy.
      Republicans only care about themselves.
      That's why we are Democrats."
      (It's not propaganda if it's your own daughter!)

  7. rambone

    Lucky for Bondi that Obamacare was upheld. She should probably see a doctor regarding her strange "blonde hair – brown eyebrows" condition.

      1. flamingpdog

        I bet the Mittster would be willing to hold her down and give her a hair cut for free, just because.

    1. tessiee

      From what I can tell, there are quite a few blondes who dye their roots and eyebrows darker.

  8. SayItWithWookies

    Hey Pam — maybe it's one of those Mitt Romney thingies, where if you give it a good shake the bad news just goes away.

  9. hollywooddood

    Does this mean 40 million uninsured Americans maybe won't suffer and die from lack of health care? Shit!

    1. shortsandpants

      We thought that the Feds paying for safe roadways and schools was bad, but just you wait until they PAY FOR OUR WELLBEING11!

    2. Isyaignert

      And the 45,000 Americans who die needlessly every year because they can't afford to see a doctor will at least have a chance.

        1. MittBorg

          Ducky, darlz! I watched a truly terrific film, available streaming from Netflix, "Travelers and Magicians." MUST-watch. I'm now watching "Krull." And you, my love?

          1. MittBorg

            Have you seen both these movies? I really think of Krull as an embodiment of the archetypal Hero myth, and in many ways, Travelers and Magicians shares those qualities, don't you think?

          2. HistoriCat

            Have not actually seen either movie but knew of Krull by reputation … I would add them to my Netflix queue but I already have a backlog I'm unlikely to ever clear!

          3. MittBorg

            Considering when it was made, Krull is surprisingly good, and I thoroughly enjoyed it. But the real surprise was Travelers and Magicians, which is available via streaming. If you never watch another film again, watch this. It was made by a Bhutanese lama, and is clever, sly, funny, spiritually enlightening, and technically stunning. Just stunning. I put off watching it for the longest time because films from Third World countries, especially TINY LITTLE third world countries, tend to be slow in pace and pretty depressing, generally. Let's just say this film was the kind that leaves you totally … happy. Buzzed.

          4. flamingpdog

            I saw Krull with the kidz when it came out in the theater, but I don't remember much about the story line. Today, I went with the youngest pup and his boyfriend to see "Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter". Talk about archtypal Hero myth (on drugs!)! Actually, for such an absurd concept, I found the movie quite engrossing. I'm hoping old Abe didn't die from his wound at the Ford's Theater, but got bitten and immoratlized by the good vampire, and maybe we'll see him again teaming up with Buffy the Vampire Slayer sometime in the future.

      1. flamingpdog

        I'm more interested in what sound a muted, rusty trombone makes when it is used to ass-fuck racist conservatards.

      2. Negropolis

        If a conservative's head explodes after an unexpected Supreme Court ruling, and no liberal is around to hear it, does it still make a sound?

          1. Negropolis

            True. And if it could not be heard, I'm sure Obi Wan Kenobi could sense it all the way across the universe.

  10. Texan_Bulldog

    It's nice to see them taking a short break from purging brown/black people from the voter rolls.

    What's the bet that Rick & Pam are getting it on ala Newt & Callista?

    1. Guppy

      It's always "purge, purge, purge" with her, be it attorneys going after foreclosure mills, or legitimate voters. When does she get to the "binge" part?

      1. Biel_ze_Bubba

        From what I can see, she gets to it at night, standing in front of her fridge. (Häagen-Dazs, because umlaut, and Ben & Jerry look like commies anyway.)

    2. SayItWithWookies

      Maybe Pam's got a cadaver fetish — that would explain her stance on healthcare as well as an attraction to her freakishly skeletal boss.

      1. MittBorg

        There is something so utterly weird and revolting about that guy, from the slick, hairless skull that looks like plastic, to the oversized, fanatically glittering eyes, to the worm-like contours of his writhing, pink lips, to the bony skull he calls a face. It's as if the makers ran out of the silicon fleshlike material so they barely stretched a layer of it across his titanium frame.

        1. Isyaignert

          Don't forget this is the fukker who ripped off Medicare over $1 Billion and had to pay the largest fine evah!

          Way to go Florida – electing a CONVICTED FELON as your leader. No wonder your state looks like a dick.

        2. UW8316154

          Washington State had Senator Slade Gorton (R) for nearly 20 years. His nickname was "Skeletor". Scott and Gorton (and what a perfect name, too…"Gorton") appear to have been manufactured at the same facility.

  11. arihaya

    Pam Bondi, the living proof that ANY dumb blondes can get elected as long as they run as Republican AND appears in Fox News

      1. Negropolis

        I mean, we are talking about Alaska. Up there, she's probably the Kate Upton of Alaska.

  12. Chet Kincaid

    Be compassionate, folks. This was supposed to be the Wingnut Rapture. McNaughton is still curled up in a corner of his studio, naked and covered in oil paint, weeping "Eloi Eloi, lama sabachthani?!"

    1. Dudleydidwrong

      Now if we can get the wingnut parade to say "It is finished" we can all spike the ball, drink a toast to good health care, and go home.

    2. MittBorg

      If I was Eloi, I'd send him a single-spaced, twenty-page, yellow-highlighter-marked missive outlining the many reasons. Offenses against art would have to be in the top ten.

      1. GemlikeFlame

        If you were Eloi, a Morlock would be having you for dinner. While it's kind of a stretch to associate the Eloi with Democrats, it's even worse trying to associate Teabaggers with the Morlock. Morlock were vicious, bloodthirsty, melanin-deficient….

        Ahem. I'm sorry. Eloi = Democrats, the good guys who tend to get served up for lunch. Morlock = the more vicious strain of know-nothing Republicans/Tea Baggers.

        Hey, don't blame me, it's right there in the book.

    3. tessiee

      "McNaughton is still curled up in a corner of his studio, naked and covered in oil paint, weeping "Eloi Eloi, lama sabachthani?!" "

      I think that gives him far too much credit for a) being educated, and b) having knowledge of what the actual Bible says, instead of just what the wingnuts wished it said — but I do like the mental picture.
      Well, OK, except for the part about naked McNaughton.

      1. Chet Kincaid

        They know what the parts that don't affect their worldview say, from my long experience with 'em. Anyway, why don't you just enjoy the damned joke instead of parsin' it to death?

    4. hippie13

      I eagerly await wingnut rapture, but believe it to be a misunderstanding of scripture(theres a first) and there will actually be some sort of mass suicide at a nascar event (possible thru creative use of Carbon monoxide) or a fatal e-coli infection in Budweiser distributed due to lack of govt regulation.

  13. Guppy

    What I don't get is why all these supposed America-lovin' Teabaggers are getting "information" from any other source than MurdochVision®?

  14. johnnyzhivago

    "Message from the gas chambers Reischfuerher Himmler – the Zircon "B" works like a charm!!!!" "Yeah…." "Oh wait a minute – another message – they're still alive…… " "Are you sure, they told me that stuff would work".

        1. SorosBot

          Now, Reid a great actress; here's what one critc had to say about her: "Reid has the world’s smallest range: She’s qualified to play everything from a dullard to a half-wit to someone who’s, quite frankly, not terribly bright."

          1. MittBorg

            Neither have I, but thank you so much for sending me to that hysterical review. Not the official reviewer's, but a site user's.

          2. tessiee

            "She’s qualified to play everything from a dullard to a half-wit to someone who’s, quite frankly, not terribly bright."

            Not to be all picky picky, but strictly speaking, I don't think that could be considered "acting".

    1. fuflans

      yeah that was pretty terrible three minutes of frantically refreshing npr quoting cnn while bbc and scotusblog had nothing.

      i mean that quite seriously.

  15. Crank_Tango

    I have to admit, this one was pretty tough to masturbate to.

    I do love how this decision was treated like a sporting event, and the GOPtards were cheering because a Republican idea got struck down, because Nobama.

    1. tessiee

      Those assholes would cheer if a comet wiped out all life on earth, as long as it inconvenienced Obama.

    2. Negropolis

      You know, everyone was treating this like a sporting event because everyone knew that the reason this made it to the courts to begin with was purely political. This wasn't about policy for either side. Generally, everyone can find something to dislike about the bill. It doesn't go far enough for folks like me, and for folks not like me, they didn't want any reform of the system, at all. So, that it was treated like the superbowl doesn't bother me. I said it somewhere else but I support this bill for almost purely political reasons.

      1. Crank_Tango

        Yeah I found myself wondering why I was happy that I was going to get forced to buy health insurance, with nary a public option in sight.

  16. johnnyzhivago

    No snark, I hope Obama can craft some commercials showing Rethuglicans cheering on the possibility of cutting off American human beings from healthcare. It is truly deplorable and anyone who says comparing them to the worst totalitarians in recent memory isn't FAIR is just not watching closely enough.

    1. flamingpdog

      If the Dems had any cajones, they'd tape a TV ad showing a Mitt-impersonator lounging on the couch in his Mormon long-johns talking about how many wives he's going to have on his own planet after he dies, and run it every five minutes from now until election day on every TV station in the South.

    2. schvitzatura

      As long as the elder, slightly-less-than-"Greatest Generation" get their choice of Hoveround model and affordable boner pills, the Republic shall prevail!

    1. TribecaMike

      Especially weird since he has no bridge. I would recommend a steampunkish monocle, but that's just me.

  17. Lionel[redacted]Esq

    See, the problem is they trusted in CNN. They should have gone with FOX News, because then they would have known that it wasn't true.

  18. Chet Kincaid

    Just think if they had "gotten" Obama and Holder both in the same day! "Get the wives and kids and spread a picnic blanket under the tree, Boys!"

  19. BlueStateLibel

    All of these videos need to end with a photo of Obama with a big grin on his face. For art's sake. I know one of you young whippersnappers can whip something up on the youtubes.

  20. Barb

    I wish we had footage of Sarah Palin's response to the news that her Chubby Cub's "Life's a Tripp" just got yanked from prime time and has been replaced with reruns of "Dance Moms" Bristol's show is now in the 11 P.M. time slot.

        1. flamingpdog

          Stoopid work computer. The IT people come into work at 4 PM and the internetz and everything on the network at work is always screwy after that.

          1. C_R_Eature

            That makes sense. After 4 on Fridays is the time when the IT pros do the extremely resource heavy stuff on the systems, like playing graphics heavy multiuser games, downloading gigabytes of Porn and running atomic weapon simulations, so it doesn't slow everyone else down during the workday.

      1. tessiee

        I would imagine that it would be very much like her response to everything else that isn't fawning adoration: Word salad that more or less translates to a lot of butthurt whinin' about how everybody is pickin' on her and her props family, with a few jingoistic catchphrases and racist dogwhistles scattered in for good measure.

    1. rocktonsam

      is that 11 central or eastern?

      if so, we're already stoned watching the news/daily show

  21. Negropolis

    "What?", indeed.

    Meh. My schaden will only be fully freuded when I see Mittbot 2012 making his concession speech.

      1. Negropolis

        Though, nothing can quite compare to John McCain's people desperately trying to cut Palin's mic fearing what she'd say. lol

      1. flamingpdog

        Earlier today, in the swing state of Colorado, Preznit Barry drops in to talk to the fire-fighters trying to keep Republitard Jesurado Springs from going up in smoke. Mitt Robme nowhere to be seen.

        1. ChessieNefercat

          Mitt Robme: "We don't need no stinkin' firefighters. We need to help Americans!"

      2. Negropolis

        I didn't really mean to imply it, but since you asked, just look at the electoral college predictions day-to-day. This race is nowhere near as close as the media wants it to be. Barring a double-dip recession (which is less likely than more likely), Romney has largely been neutured/defanged, whatever you want to call it.

        Health care is largely off the table as an issue, now. The Republicans really don't want to fuck with the debt ceiling thingy, again. Obama's out front of same-sex marriage, now. There is just so much that has largely been neutralized. The president has to be worried about the monthly job reports, but beyond that, he's either on the right side of the popular opinion on issues, or at least has drawn Romney to a tie in the ones he's not. It's also becoming more clear by the day just how incredibly crappy a candidate Mitt Romney is, worse than we could have thought.

        1. tessiee

          I'm disgusted by the hatred and disrespect toward our President, but as far as I can tell, nobody likes Romney, either — not even the people who are supposedly on his side, which makes me wonder how/why they ended up with him. He's not Obama, and that seems to be about all they can say for him.

  22. Not_So_Much

    She may be an evil, incompetent skank, but that goiter of her's clearly says "party!"

  23. C_R_Eature

    I believe that Nelson Muntz still has the most appropriate comment for these scenes.

  24. Negropolis

    But, you guys, Boehner so promised that he's going to repeal this thing in the House in a few weeks!

    These fuckers are clueless. Talk about an exercize is futility. They still don't realize that this is a losing issue, for them, bless their hearts. They should be screaming about "8% unemployment!" as they had been – and even that was a dubious strategy – but they are back screaming about a law that the conservative chief justice of the Supreme Court upheld. Fuck 'em.

    1. C_R_Eature

      Fine by me. Let these fuckers pretend that they're Cardigan's Light Brigade and charge down into the Valley of Death, for no good reason at all.

      The critical mistake that the Right Wingers make – and they make it every time – is that they become so enveloped in their propaganda that they come to believe it absolutely and think that the entire country is behind their radical schemes. It happened to Goldwater in the 50's, It happened to Gingrich in the 90's and it's happening right now.

      They've been enthralled by the rousing poetry of their own radio and TV Tennysons to such an extent they forgot that the original Charge of the Light Brigade was a nightmare scenario of botched intelligence, conflicting orders, inexperienced leaders and rash bravado and is generally considered to be a catastrophic blunder of historic proportions.

      It sounds awfully familiar, doesn't it?

      1. TribecaMike

        What these idiots don't know, or want to admit, is Spiro Agnew already did it all and cleverer.

        1. C_R_Eature

          Spiro's My Hero!

          Eh, that's Ancient History to them – Before Reagan- and so now worth consideration. Plus Nixon was probably a Secret Democrat and no one today could possibly pull off the phrase "Nattering Naobs of Negativism." (thanks, Safire).

          1. C_R_Eature

            Pronounced "Turripins" in Bawlmer, Hon.

            No hammers for me. I'm from the Jersey coast. I boil my crabs and rip them apart by hand, as God intended.

          2. TribecaMike

            Damn straight. If you're around Cape May next month, I'll be the white haired white bearded guy with the Guinness baseball cap wandering along the shore searching for interesting pebbles.

          3. C_R_Eature

            Well, that sounds awfully fun but I will be otherwise occupied, I think. Check out Sunset Beach way at the end of Rt. 606 by where the Cement Ship is falling apart. I used to have great luck finding Cape May Diamonds there. Have a few beers at the Ugly Mug, listen to some music, look out from the old coastal Fortifications (if they still let you on) at Delaware Bay for Humpback whales and park in the lighthouse lot to walk the Point State Park for great birdwatching.

            Actually, this is starting to sound fun.

          4. tessiee

            "I'm from the Jersey coast."

            And you don't call it "down the shore"? Or was your choice of words deliberate, so as to be understood?

          5. C_R_Eature

            I just noticed this. I think I've developed an aversion to the term Jersey Shore, because of the disgraceful MTV series and it's celebration of the same rude, loud, selfish, badly behaved walking validated preconception tourists that have made summers at the New Jersey beach towns miserable for me since before I was a teenager and have prompted the display of countless "BENNIES GO HOME!" signs, as well as wild celebrations when they finally slither back to Queens leaving a swath of broken windows, beer cans, used condoms and unpaid rent bills in their wake.

          6. TribecaMike

            How she put up with that schmuck is beyond my ken. And that goes for Pat Nixon as well.

          7. C_R_Eature

            No kidding! Quite a bit of Synchronicity in the blog postings this night.

            I'm sure she was a lovely woman and she lived a good long life at 91 years.
            I actually voted for Helen Bentley a few times, because she supported research and was a big booster of the Port of Baltimore, but this was back before she came out for Ehrlich and the Republicans went crazy.

            The last R that I voted for was Wayne Gilchrest because he had such a strong record of supporting conservation in the Chesapeake. Wayne will be the very last Republican that I will ever vote for. For obvious reasons.

          8. TribecaMike

            My brother-in-law worked with William Donald Schaefer in his heyday, and often said that though the man was a complete egomaniac and often full of shit, he was a real sweetheart who meant what he said and kept his word. Politics is a funny old thing.

          9. C_R_Eature

            Cool, I bet he has some stories! When I first came down here, Schaefer was Governor and a real larger-than-life figure on the scene. He completely gave his life over to public service, something almost unheard of these days. There was a huge amount of Ego involved, to be sure, but he was genuinely concerned with doing an excellent job and doing well by his state.

            He could be prickly. One of his more infamous lines was when he greeted a State Rep. from the Eastern Shore with "So, how's the shithouse side of Maryland?" in public. This was years ago and I still see locals proudly displaying bumper stickers saying "I'm from the Sh*thouse side of Maryland".

            Long memories and a lot of pride out here, much like the Pineys of South Jersey.

          10. flamingpdog

            "So, how's the shithouse side of Maryland?"

            Well, if nothing else, he was a man who spoke the truth.

          11. C_R_Eature

            Well, to be fair the place was a Paradise before we let all those Europeans settle here.

          12. flamingpdog

            If I remember correctly, Spiro was a Dem when he was mayor of Balmer, but turned Rethug later. But it's been a long time.

            And I predicted Nixon would select Spiro as his VP before anyone else did. No brag, just fact.

          13. C_R_Eature

            I defer to your comprehensive knowledge, as I did Not Know That!

            Those were simpler times, when the Opposition Party actually believed in governance. Nixon is still a blight upon our society, though and the Evil that he did is with us still.

    2. rocktonsam

      my favorite is watching constitution/health care experts $arah Palin and Sh-yawn Hannity mental masturbate to the dumb Fox watchers to help them really understand Obama is the worst EVER!/

      also, $arah, honey, that new hair do makes you look like a jabbering Cousin It.

      1. ChessieNefercat

        I saw a clip of that bizarre interview. Even with no sound (can't risk what's left of my hearing), I could tell she was talking in slow motion unlike her usual hyper teakettle shriek.

        I wonder how many elephant gun tranquilizer darts were required to calm her down. Her reaction to the ruling and finding out that she wasn't going to be able to sneer for all eternity at the president's stupid failure to understand the constuhtooshun must have have blown every fuse in her dimly lit cranium.

        Payback time, baby! Oh wait, what? Bzzzzzt! And you know she was watching Fox.

  25. flamingpdog

    Somewhat OT, but someone calling in to the Thom Hartman program this afternoon noted that Roberts saying the penalty for not getting insurance is like a tax could turn the legislation into a revenue bill, in which case the Dems in the Senate, if the Rethugs regain a majority there, could not use the filibuster to stop a Rethug effort to repeal the legislation.

    John Roberts = crazy like a fox.

    1. SayItWithWookies

      I'm not sure that's too worrisome — Roberts' opinion was that the penalty acts like a tax, rather than being a literal tax — the penalty is still a penalty, much the way that here in Virginia if you don't have car insurance you have to pay $500 to legally drive, but it's not revenue in the sense that it has to originate in the House (which for some reason doesn't always happen anyway). Semantically it's a tax, but according to the way legislation is passed, I don't think it qualifies as a tax.

    2. Negropolis

      I honestly don't think it's that deep. I think that's more conservatives trying to pull something good out of a horrible rulingfor them. Truth is, that this is still a penalty, and not a traditional tax.

      1. flamingpdog

        My understanding is that Roberts' opinion said it was "like a tax", and logic says it is not a tax, but if the Rethugs take over the Senate and keep the House, it will become what they say it is, and they will say it is a tax. Barry has to be there to veto any legislation to repeal.

        1. Negropolis

          This seems like a very roundabout and contrived way to motivate Dems to vote, then. Again, I really don't think it's that deep or nefarious, or that we need to twist it like this to get people motivated. The ruling was rather clear, and people need to stop with this conspiracy theory laden 11 dimensional chess. Honestly, let's leave thse narratives to them. They are reaching for any kind of silver lining they can, and this is a dubious lining, at best.

  26. mrblifil

    ROFL! It's hilarious to see them so butt hurt thinking that the naggers and the blahs might get health care. Which makes no sense because if they really believed in death panels they would want the untermenschen sent to them forthwith.

  27. iburl

    Let's all impeach John Roberts, it can be a unity project to Bring America Together. Make sure we impeach him this summer, JUSTICE CANNOT WAIT!

  28. MittBorg

    HAHAHAHA!!! Oh, Wonketz, my Wonketz, NEVER CHANGE!

    Mock those heartless assholes for all they're worth. Disgusting motherfuckers, to be so thrilled at the idea that at least THREE MILLION of their fellow citizens will lose access to health care. And so miserable to hear that they will not. Savour, you miserable bastids. That is what I'm doing right now. Savouring your bitter, bitter tears.

  29. finallyhappy

    That woman is Florida's AG?? She looks like the hostess at the Olive Garden in NE Philly.

  30. Willardbot9000_V2.5

    I love this continuous coverage of impotent wingnut fury especially given another jump the shark moment by 24 hour news. Nothing is better than watching a bunch of selfish, self-centered and wholly incapable of compassion assholes get positively orgasmic one moment and dejected the next. If this were a movie this would be the end of act 3 comeuppance for a prickish character who all movie long is a smug, insufferable prick just to suffer a final, satisfying humiliation conga at the end. Really, it couldn't be framed better and I love wonkette for this. When I heard about the ruling I thought "oh, MSNBC should have some good stuff" about hysterical teabaggers but nope…lots of navelgazing and shit like liberals can't allow themselves to rub wingnut noses and too-close together inbred eyes in shit for a change. Thank you Rebecca for indulging my ambient political shadenfreude, I hope the videos and stories keep coming…

    1. tessiee

      "wholly incapable of compassion"

      Oddly, I read this as "wholly incapable of concession" and thought of that jerkoff with the big horsey-looking buck teeth who whined and threw taxpayer-funded tantrums for six months after Al Franken beat him.

    2. Negropolis

      I was thinking the same thing. The circus that was on the Supreme Court steps that day should have included us in larger numbers. Instead, you get a relatively quiet group of non-dramatic supporters of the bill, while the teabaggers are on the steps damn-near rending their clothes/costumes in inconsolable grief.

      We need better street theater. And no, the drum circles aren't good enough. lol Also, we have to get better at ending a narrative decisively instead of leaving it hanging.

    3. tessiee

      "If this were a movie this would be the end of act 3 comeuppance for a prickish character who all movie long is a smug, insufferable prick just to suffer a final, satisfying humiliation conga at the end."

      This doesn't happen nearly enough in real life.
      Hell, it doesn't even happen nearly enough in movies!

  31. Willardbot9000_V2.5

    Seriously, this couldn't happen to nicer people…from the whole smug self assurance that the Supreme Court is fixed to the smug self assurance that Mittbot 9000000000 2.5 will somehow become president, this is awesome. I mean, it's bad enough to watch a bunch of bigots sit in power feeling inscrutible because their asshole, sociopathic allies on the judiciary have given them carte blanche to put a giant, even moreso "For Sale" sign up for democracy…this gets a LITTLE bit back. After Barry O'Bamz smokes that magic underpants wearing fraudulent fop in November maybe we can get another justice or two and bring Citizens United back up for reconsideration…it would be great to watch the rightward lurch toward fascism cloaked in freedumz get derailed like this again.

    Oh and one more thing….clap and cheer for the state to cruelly allow sick children and adults to die because you fuckfaces couldn't imagine them being cared for if they cannot afford over-priced, discriminatory and poorly rendered private insurance again, you fat, scooter-driving inbred, obese demented bible humping Southern white pricks! Ahhh….feels good! Oh and PS…Beerfart is STILL DEAD, Beck still sucks and Fox Nuuz is so corrupt and 'tarded they can't even own up for their responsibility in jumping the shark again, also….by the way, get back to me about personal responsibility over that one, too wingnuts…

  32. TribecaMike

    Back in my day, kids, Walter Cronkite would've stuck his middle finger out of the screen right into her sour puss.

  33. Willardbot9000_V2.5

    Last post…I'm a bit behind on the news…but one more taunt…that's right, bitches…it's CONSTITUTIONAL! Just like the Voting Rights Act and Civil Rights Acts, Affirmative Action, Personal Privacy and Womens Sufferage were ALL CONSTITUTIONAL, too! Fuckheads…sorry, I've spent more time than I ever cared to debating the constitutionality of Obammer-care…so this is VERY cathartic…and I picked fights on MSN's story about it, too.

    1. tessiee

      "…it's CONSTITUTIONAL! Just like the Voting Rights Act and Civil Rights Acts, Affirmative Action, Personal Privacy and Womens Sufferage were ALL CONSTITUTIONAL, too!"

      It's amazing how these shitbags have been on the wrong side of everything, ever, throughout all of this country's history. You'd think that just by sheer mathematical odds, they'd be right about something at least once, but it never happens.

  34. NYNYNYjr

    "Pam Blondi, 2004 Miss Nude Tampa, 2008 runner-up Miss Florida, and sadly, compared to other Floridians, totally the best person to be Attorney General."

    1. tessiee

      "Miss Nude Tampa"

      This… is a very weird pageant title, not least because it's so *specific*. I mean, were the semi-finals Miss Topless Tampa and Miss Bottomless Tampa; or Miss Nude East Tampa, Miss Nude West Tampa, Miss Nude North Tampa, and Miss Nude South Tampa?
      Also, what was the talent portion of the pageant like?

  35. flamingpdog

    I couldn't *tear in eye* find anything about Pam Bondi being 2004 Miss Nude Tampa, but I did find this rather fitting snark.

        1. Blueb4sunrise

          That's not what I meant. Yeesh.

          I heard the band Plants and Animals on the radio [that radio] thing today. A song off their new album The End of That

          I thought the tune I heard…
          "Somewhere between a crisis and a pretty good time" was pretty good, but I can't find anything else by them I like……
          http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0eFSXcQfKZE

          So I'm gonna go back to listening to Memphis Minnie.

      1. tessiee

        That looks like one of those Russian Fishing cats (not sure if that's the exact name).

  36. ifthethunderdontgetya

    Early career

    She is a former prosecutor and spokeswoman in Hillsborough County, Florida where she worked as an Assistant State Attorney. Bondi resigned this position to seek the office of Attorney General of Florida. She has made guest appearances on Scarborough Country with Joe Scarborough and various other cable news programming on MSNBC and worked for Fox News as a legal analyst.

    Bondi prosecuted former Major League Baseball player Dwight Gooden for violating the terms of his probation and for substance abuse.

    F.U. Biotch!
    ~

    1. Negropolis

      She's also the person who had to be pressured for weeks into appointing a special prosecutor to investigate the Trayvon Martin case, lest we forget. Were it not for the likes of Al Sharpton raising hell down in Stamford, this would have been swept under the rug.

  37. Antispandex

    " Five minute recess so we can go gloat in private….wait, what the fuck?" Well, someone aint getting no loving tonight.

          1. C_R_Eature

            "Wot's an Undead bloke got to do to get a bit of privacy in the basement of the Naval Observatory these days, ay?"

  38. fuflans

    god i cannot TELL you how much i hate that bimbo blond hair twirling crap. jesus christ woman you are an AG. you are not in sunnydale high. reese whitherspoon was in a goddamn movie. and IT'S JUST GROSS TO TOUCH YOUR HAIR THAT MUCH. if it's a problem

    CUT. IT. OFF.

    and before anyone in NJ accuses me of jealousy, i am blond and – mr fuflans informs me – small but quite shapely.

    1. tessiee

      What I can't stand is when somebody has those long, floppy bangs, and the bangs get in their eyes, and they TOSS their head to get their bangs out of their eyes.
      *stabby*

      1. ChessieNefercat

        It's usually toss…toss…toss…toss…toss…toss…toss…toss…toss…toss… x eight hours if you have to work with them.

        Yes. *stabby* is exactly the same reaction I have.

    2. BoatOfVelociraptors

      The constant hair flicking reminds me of pornos, where the actors always ensure that the cameraman gets a good shot of the action.

      Seriously, if your hair gets in the way that often you should probably get a haircut, blonde hippie.

  39. miss_grundy

    These rat bastards and bitches are beyond clueless. They are the stupidest, most selfish, most un-Xtian jerks that exist on the planet. Don't these asshats understand that it is better for everyone in the USA to be covered by health insurance? Don't these asshats understand that if everyone, even the most indigent under Medicaid, that local and state governments won't have to pick up the hospital tabs on people who, currently, are not covered by insurance???? Think about it, there are city and county governments who won't have to pick up the tab on health care for people who don't have the money to pay for it and these people are wheeled into city and county hospitals for emergency care that can go into six figures. THIS IS A FRACKING GOOD THING!

    How stupid are these asshats? We need maurauding groups of Democrats to go out and beat the shit out of these Republicans once and for all. I am fed up with these comemierdas (shit eaters).

    1. Madam Killjoy

      This is how stupid they are:

      "It is amazing that people who think we cannot afford to pay for doctors, hospitals, and medication somehow think that we can afford to pay for doctors, hospitals, and medication and a government bureaucracy to administer it." – Thomas Sowell

      1. TribecaMike

        When the likes of Thomas Sowell is considered to be one of the top intellectuals of one's party, it's time to fold up the tent and close the circus down.

        1. Madam Killjoy

          Oh, don't I know it. This is just one of the many stupid things being posted to FaceBook, probably because it accompanies a picture of him, showing that these conservative folks can't possibly be racist if they like what the blah guy is saying!

    2. tessiee

      It's true that they're stupid and brainwashed, but I think you may be underestimating how much of their actions are fueled by pure spite and malice.
      Even if you sat down and showed them the math proving that it was cheaper, and somehow got them to actually *believe* it, instead of just dismissing the math as "elitist East Coast propaganda"…
      they wouldn't care.
      They would rather spend ten times as much than help a poor person.
      I am dead serious; they would burn that money in an ashtray rather than give it to a bunch of "lazy bums" [although they'd actually call them something much worse than that].
      They're hateful, spiteful shitheads. That's why they're in real pain at the thought of poor people getting any kind of help, and that's why I'm enjoying their comeuppance as much as I am.

  40. Madam Killjoy

    Should we be worried that Roberts upheld the mandate as a tax rather than via the Commerce Clause? Is this a long game play of weakening the Commerce Clause? Or is this just him trying to legitimize the court?

    I think I've just answered my own question: I am clearly not drunk enough for 10:30 on a Friday night. To the wine box!

        1. Madam Killjoy

          Child abuse is not funny. I grew up witnessing my cousins' abuse at the hands of their father and it was horrifying, to say the least. But, seriously, Faye Dunaway campily chewing the scenery in this flick is just … It's just perfect. My favorite over-the-top-delivery line actually belongs to Christine: "I AM NOT ONE OF YOUR FANS!!, causing Mommy Dearest to strangle her in front of a reporter. Good times. Good times. {I've often wonder if they made this flick SO campy just to (so to speak) soften the blow re: Joan Crawford being a horrific monster}. But I can't help watching it every time it comes on. Plus, I just love this: "Don't fuck with me, fellas. This ain't my first time at the rodeo!"

  41. onemoretime79

    When I hit the send button I was automatically deleted? WTF. I simply said thanks for this video.

    I wondered who the black woman was, on the third row behind the blonde. I was kind of mesmerized by her smile, and I further wondered if she already knew the real decision and was just kind of holding back.

    Why was I automatically deleted? Anyhow. This video is priceless. So I appreciate seeing it. Thanks for posting it!

    1. scvirginia

      I think this site is just a little buggy sometimes- I've been deleted also, & much too quickly for anyone to have read my innocuous comment & been offended.

      1. ttommyunger

        I am so over Rightards, they just depress me, even when they are unintentionally hilarious. I'm finding them less and less amusing as time goes on; but then I'm old and cranky.

  42. C_R_Eature

    Kids, I'm within minutes of getting hit with a Derecho storm that originated in Iowa and charged across half the country with hail and 60 to 90 mph winds, lightning and torrential rain. The anemometer went from zero to 15 to 30 mph spikes in a few seconds and the barometer's falling fast. Serious light show in the west, behind the clouds. Doppler radar has a line of mesocyclone cells from north to south and intermittent rotation signatures.
    If I didn't know that historically severe storms fueled by Anthropogenic Climate Change was a total Liberal myth, I'd be very worried now.

      1. C_R_Eature

        Whew! Made it through ok with surprisingly minimal damage. Thanks for your concern. I'm on the MD part of the Delmarva peninsula & things got pretty sporty before this monster line squall blew offshore. A lot of the Mid-Atlantic, from Virgina through Baltimore got hit hard and thousands are out of power now. Off to deal with downed trees and such now.

        1. Jukesgrrl

          I saw on TV what a mess the grounds of Congressional Country Club are in. They said they weren't letting the public in to watch the golf match — too much potential danger. Melissa Harris Perry said on MSNBC that 2 MILLION people in DC Metro are without power. Check in with us later.

          1. C_R_Eature

            It's bad. Maryland's been hit hard as well as DC and VA. Less damage on the Delmarva, but widely scattered power outages and lots of trees down. As bad as Isabel but w/o storm surge. Worst case scenario – record temps. thru next week and no power to hundreds of thousands. This system crossed half the country in a day – no time to call in power co. crews from out of state.
            Severe storm in Richmond & southeast VAnow & I hope those people ok.
            exhausted Been helping neighbors & moving limbs/trees all day. More storms on the way. oh boy batten down the hatches

          2. not that Radio

            Stay safe, brother.

            Hey, mumbletypeg — if you can hear this, please check in, okay?

            UPDATE: mumbletypeg checked in. She's okay.

          3. C_R_Eature

            Thanks, friend. I'm prepped as I can be, just have to ride this out. So much stress on the systems here that cable, phone, net and even broadcast tv having sporadic problems. folks you know may well be out of touch for days, fyi.
            derecho's usually a feature of the plains & this one traveled far and fast. just another weather anomaly in a new age of constant severe weather anomalies. Good thing there's no such thing as global warming and it's not our fault anyway it's natural and it would hurt the economy to fix and algore's fat and lives in a mansion

          4. not that Radio

            Brian Williams really brought it home for a lot of Americans yesterday — he reported that *gasp* NETFLIX SERVICE MAY BE AFFECTED. My colleagues in WV won't have power restored for up to 10 days. Assuming they still have homes.

            Al Gore's fatness really is to blame for all this, isn't it? If fatness alone were cause to discredit someone's message, why in hell is Limbaugh still on the air?

            Here, we have the opposite problem. We're on fire, and it's windy as hell, and it won't frickin rain. Times like these, a transcontinental pipeline (we have the technology to do that, right?), that would drain water from flood-ravaged midwest, rust belt, and east coast states and dump it out here, where we could really use it, seems desirable.

          5. C_R_Eature

            Well golly, we can tolerate 5 million people out of power, massive damage, trees down and cars smashed, but NETFLIX IS DOWN NOOOO THIS MUST NOT STAND.

            The Wingers pick at Al about anything they can, just to discredit the message. He's a Fraud because he lives in a house and flies jets to conferences overseas and doesn't live in a cave and wear a hairshirt. Of course, if he lived in a cave and wore a hairshirt that would be Weird and a sign of the way all the envirofascsists want us to live. Fat is just the bonus point, because they're assholes and Rude.

            Seems as if we have two choices these days: Burn or Drown. You takes yer pick.

            Asimov used to write a straight science column for Fantasy & Science Fiction magazine. His idea to water the deserts was to cut huge chunks of ice off of the Arctic/Antarctic ice sheets & use oceangoing tugs to tow them to Libya or wherever. He worked out the economics by calculating the amount of ice lost to melt on the trip and so on. We could do that, but we have to move fast. There will be no more Arctic Ice pack in 20 years or less.

          6. not that Radio

            If we were witches, we could both burn and drown, and that would prove our innocence. And then we could go on leading normal lives.

            You takes yer pick. reminds me of something my dad used to say, in the 70s: "you pays your money, and you takes your chances". Maybe a quote from National Lampoon, or Gene Wilder, or Guido Sarducci? Who knows.

            Imagine if, disregarding all the money that's gone into PR and propaganda and whatnot, if we took the projected cost of Keystone XL, and rather than doing something totally destructive with that money, we used it to build a different kind of transcontinental pipleline. Wouldn't that be something? Something forward-thinking? Good thing Ronaldus Magnus got rid of those stupid solar panels on the roof of the White House. What if we had had a 35-year head start on solar infrastructure, like Israel and Brazil have done? I was in Jerusalem in 1980, when I was 11, and every frickin 6-flat in town had solar panels on the roof. That made an impression on an 11-year-old boy, in 1980. Imagine the kind of impression it could make now.

          7. C_R_Eature

            What floats in water? Churches. Very small rocks. A duck.

            "Buy the ticket, take the ride" was an Hunter S. Thompson-ism, if that's any help. the itinerant Carnival Barkers used to say that too, I think, in the process of Fleecing the Rubes.

            I weep tears of rage and frustration when I think of all the years and billions of dollars we've wasted denying AGW and fighting tooth and nail against modernization of our energy production industries. If these fossil fuel Captains of Industry had any creative foresight and weren't greedy sociopathic emotional children, they'd have realized long ago that new, efficient, non-polluting sources and conservation IS the future and they would have poured all that money into R&D instead of character assassination and hiring Climate-ostitutes.

          8. MumbletyRadio

            you pays your money, and you takes your chance

            I'll take Sarducci… but for the record, Bruce Cockburn has an outstanding song by that title (cannot find a link to anything with him performing it at least not videorecorded, but see if an audio exists somewhere, which I'm less familiar with digging up)

          9. C_R_Eature

            You're probably right about Father Guido. Cockburn is a great songwriter and I'll look for that too. Thanks!

          10. C_R_Eature

            Thanks, I needed that. Neko's a great, very emotive singer and I don't hear her nearly enough.

            I am enjoying "connectivity" while I can but at 2330 EDT I'm just about done. Was saving this for all the Canada Day posts I was planning tomorrow, but what the hell: Fly Me to the Moon

          11. not that Radio

            Are you suggesting some kind of Neko Case/Dianna Krall/Creature/Dewey 4-way action?

            Hawt.

          12. C_R_Eature

            I love this, thanks! Green phosphorescent coral reef fish! Field Biology is where it's at.

            These are absolutely gorgeous – iridescent by day and glowing phosphorescent by night. They sometimes occur in swarms though and can lose their appeal very quickly when your plankton sampling net comes up on deck totally packed with jelly.

          13. MumbletyRadio

            I can't decide if my favorite New Thing learned from that piece was that there are things called Clown Fish, or that "False" Moray Eels exist, including the fluorescent variety featured.

          14. MumbletyRadio

            haha thanks for that — I WOULD have checked in sooner, but had to reply to all these fool "WORDS WITH FRIENDS"-friends itching for me to hurry up and return-play before the next power outage.

            Steady rain in Mumblety-hood (Richmond) and lightning visible/ thunder audible like a big come-on tease messing with folks' minds. If you have power you wonder how much longer; if not you are glad at least the temps dropped with this storm, many are making do keeping windows open but as I recall from TropStorm-Gaston craziness, a good fan operable with only a Duracell is hard to find. Investing in a generator is making more & more sense these days.

            C_R_Eature, glad you're safe too; grateful for your hijinks on here but also for the local update as I've watched these storms with interest since they don't hit consistently across adjacent areas~

            ETA: Hail, also. Some friends without power at home, are smartPhone-FB-updating that a hailstorm, of course, has stranded them at whichever Wal-Mart just sold them a generator.

          15. C_R_Eature

            Hey, Mumblety – glad to hear you're OK too. Thanks very much for the nice thoughts and I enjoy your posts too.

            FYI, here's a useful site for you:
            Weather Underground
            set for Richmond, but you can fine-tune it as you wish. The interactive weather map is particularly useful as you can set it to display many different types of radar sigs, severe weather and lightning. Here's the link to the VA Department of Emergency Management too, if you don't have it yet.

            Stay safe and write back when you can.

            – CRE

          16. C_R_Eature

            Hey, Mumblety – Looks like the latest wave to T-storms have run south of you and are pummeling Norfolk now. Think we're in the clear for the rest of the night.

          17. not that Radio

            Glad you guys are okay. Lightning is cool. 90 mph wind ON LAND WITH NO HURRICANE is not cool. These atmospheric anomalies are totally within the domain of the Navier-Stokes equations, but that doesn't mean that it's not destructive nor that we can predict what's going to happen. As C_R_Eature said, (paraphrasing, quoting Condi Rice) "nobody could have predicted anthropogenic global warming".

          18. C_R_Eature

            Thanks for the linky. I've seen these used to model ocean and bay currents but somehow I forgot that they work for atmospheric modeling too!

            If this derecho hit a ship at sea they'd be calling it a White Squall, all kinds of water would be flying sideways and the sea state would go to mountainous very fast.

            All in all, a pretty awesome example of heat energy re-balancing in the atmosphere. Rapid, catastrophic heat energy re-balancing.

          19. Jukesgrrl

            Aw, geez.So sorry to hear you're having such a rough time.I lived in DC for awhile (one year without any A/C) so I know how miserable that heat can get with the humidity — let alone all the problems no electricity can pile on.Take care.I'll be thinking about you.

          20. C_R_Eature

            Thanks for the kind thoughts JG. Power's up again – for the time being – and I came away from this far better off than most. I'm pretty Storm Ready, especially in Hurricane season.
            A year in D.C.without air conditioning sounds like Devil's Island, but with museums.

          21. Jukesgrrl

            Funny you said that.I was a resident member of the Smithsonian and spent many a Sunday reading the papers in the members' lounge then having dinner in one of the cafeterias just to be in the A/C.The worst was putting on pantyhose to go to work!

          22. C_R_Eature

            This is becoming a real season of coincidences for me.
            Having to live at the Smithsonian sounds like Heaven to me, even with all the hordes of Tourists. One of my all time favorite places, ever and good for you that you had that opportunity!
            The only way I'd wear pantyhose in D.C. (or anywhere else, for that matter) would be to raise money for charity.

          23. Jukesgrrl

            Is it still bad there?I saw Eugene Robinson on MSNBC this morning being interviewed from his house and the show host said, “You must be the only person in DC with electricity.” Gene replied, “Shhh.Don't tell more people.They're lined up outside wanting to come in and charge their cell phones.”I hope he was kidding.Stay well!

          24. C_R_Eature

            Thanks, again, for the good thoughts. OK here and almost cleaned up all the downed trees and branches, after 5 days. The MD side of Delmarva came through surprisingly well. considering we're usually the ones that get pummeled.
            There are still 100,000 homes still dark in these Maryland counties out of almost 600,000 reported. The DC area is still reeling, with widespread damage and outages 5 days out. Power company trucks are showing up here from Georga to New Brunswick, Canada and it's still going to take days to get everybody back on line. I feel very badly for the people still affected and have been helping out a bit as well as contributing to the Red Cross. Probably be over on the western shore all next weekend.
            We have as much widespread damage as a hurricane hit and we haven't been hit with a hurricane yet. The season goes through November, so there's plenty of time for that. Fully expecting to get walloped at some point this year.

        2. el_donaldo

          Crazy. I was there!! Checking into a motel in Salisbury with the fam on the way back from a few weeks at the Outer Banks. We were trying to unload the wagon, but we couldn't keep the doors open the wind was so fierce. Really thought something bad was going to happen, but it didn't really even rain.

          1. C_R_Eature

            Happy that you & yours made it through safe!

            This one hit hard and fast, a White Squall on land. One minute it's dead flat calm and the next, screaming straight line gale force winds, torrential rain and continuous lightning set to the tune of branches snapping and debris pelting the house. I've been through a lot of storms and this one was on a par with what this area went through during Isabel in '03. At least it blew through faster and there was no storm surge.
            More pop-up storms this afternoon, so stay safe. Nothing like that derecho though, Thank FSM.

    1. UW8316154

      Glad you're okay! The only thing to do in heavy weather is batten down the hatches and hope for the best.

      It's another rainy, gray, drizzly day in the Pacific Northwest. There was one day of sunshine where it got up to like 75 (!) last week, but you can be certain that didn't last. Of course, we have earthquakes up here, so it's an environmental tossup.

      1. C_R_Eature

        Thanks for the good thoughts. I grew up next to the Atlantic Ocean and you learn how to deal with storms very quickly. Always be prepared and know when to run.

        We get earthquakes here too, but usually small, intermittent ones that no one notices. Unless gas exploration companies are pumping hydrofracking fluid into the ground, then we get the big ones.

  43. DrunkIrishman

    Fucking bimbo can't comprehend why anyone would want to help the poor. Hey, at least she'll have a nice gig lined up at FOX when her ass is dumped by Florida voters.

  44. Nostrildamus

    Pity the poor staffer that went to update Scott and knocked on the stall door before he finished.

  45. ElPinche

    You know who's getting laid HARD tonight? Hint: rhymes with NOBAMA.

    BTW, where did Rick Scott go in the video? He probably went to give one of Adelson's VPs a blow job.

  46. ttommyunger

    OK. Due to some replies I got, watched the vid. All I really took from it is that the female lead has that "walking behind the plow" gait that convinces me she can't get off unless she is on top doing the mounting. Believe me, I know of what I speak.

  47. BoroPrimorac

    Got anything on Ken Cuccinelli? I'd love to see how the prick who started this whole crusade reacted upon hearing the good news.

      1. BoroPrimorac

        Thanks. He was really sad at first, then he realized that the states will get to deny poor people Medicaid and he brightened up again. To hell with the fact that keeping people healthy is a lot cheaper than having them show up in an ER when they become severely sick. Bastard.

  48. anniegetyerfun

    Seattle Wonketteers: I keep trying to find Weejee's contact info here, but alas, cannot. I've been having fun with bronchitis for the past week or so, and last night it morphed into a rather ugly fever. Because I haz a knocked up, I can't really TAKE anything for it, so I am miserable, lying in bed and drinking chicken soup. And I HATE chicken soup.

    Please accept my sincere apologies for not being able to attend. I was really looking forward to meeting you guys (and seeing some of the familiar faces).

    1. DemmeFatale

      Poor girl!
      Try a cold air humidifier to make breathing easier.
      (You'll need one for the kid anyway.)
      Make sure all your bedding and nightie is 100% cotton, too. You'll be more comfortable.
      And Miso soup makes a nice change.
      (Once a mom, always a mom.)

      1. anniegetyerfun

        Thanks, my dear. I DID switch to miso, which is such a good thing. Feeling much better today, but still loathing that I missed pretty much an entire weekend of fun.

  49. BoatOfVelociraptors

    I'm enjoying the weather currently. Can't wait for 6:39 (always be fashionably late).

  50. Buckminster

    I'm just so gratified to see that smug, supercilious simpering that passes for "understanding" the issues in the Tea Party Circles get slapped back to the fambly outhouse. Haw, haw.

      1. flamingpdog

        Ooo, did I miss some news by only being able to read maybe 1 out of every five blog posts?

      2. Lube

        OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HOWS CAN BEE OS FUNNNNNNNNNNNYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MOER PLACE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!LOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

      3. UW8316154

        On June 2, 2009, there was a poll among the wonkett commentariat about whether or not a certain C1uster_Wolf should be subject the the banhammer. Some of us still remember the day.

        Can I go ahead and pre-emptively make a similar vote, today? Alternatively, we could go back to the future and bring back the shame posts.

        Just sayin. Apropros of nothing, of course.

  51. RavenRant

    I'm so thirsty for wingnut tears. I think this is what they call… withdrawal. Please someone – make more wingnuts cry. Please.

    1. Fukui-sanRadioBarb

      You want tears? Look no further than the ravings at free republic!

      He gets everything he wants. And all the democrats march to his drum. And the republicans seem afraid to scream the obvious. From where does he get his power?

      By declaring himself King. This black is our self proclaimed communists dictator. And he will have bought enough ignorant Americans combined with fraudulent election will win another term. If happens I see CWII on its way.

      - Logical Me

      Don't believe in any silver linings until you actually see them with your own eyes. Oh, and to answer your question, there is no silver lining in this travesty.

      The only silver lining is that the scales are falling off of a lot of eyes and secession is being given the consideration it deserves as a viable alternative to collectivism.

      - central_va

      “From where does he get his power?”

      He just took it the same way Hitler did. No one stopped Hitler and no one will stop Hussein.

      Got water and food stored?

      - Marcella

      Doesn't it taste sweet? MMmmmm. "WAAAH SECESSION!" is always my favourite flavour of wingnut tear.

      1. not that Radio

        there is no silver lining in this travesty.
        The only silver lining is that the scales are falling off of a lot of eyes

        hahahahahahaha

      2. RavenRant

        I love the way they manage to simultaneously call all their opponents traitors while threatening secession/armed insurrection against the US government.

        And, of course, their objections have NOTHING TO DO with race, how DARE you suggest such a thing, but they have to keep dragging race into every comment.

        1. Negropolis

          I know, right? It's always "black this" and "Niggra that", but how dare you call them on it. What the hell is "This black"?

          1. RavenRant

            Haven't you heard? The only 'real' racism is having the gall to notice overt, grotesque, violent, old school racism. And Glenn Beck is the 'real' MLK.

            It's wingnuts all the way down.

    2. Negropolis

      Be careful to not gorge your shit on the batshit crazy lest you get a stomach ache.

      1. RavenRant

        Thanks. I prefer the tears distilled, with the batshit triple-filtered out and displayed in a specimen jar.

        1. Negropolis

          LOL. I just noticed I said to be careful not to gorge your shit when I meant self.

          1. RavenRant

            Hmm. I'm going to try to interpret that shit-self mixup in the most un-paranoid way possible.

            Happy Sunday! Have some utterly frivolous, non-political, summertime fun, if that is at all possible.

            Then let's get back to work beating these sickass shitheels like piñatas in November, 2012. Mmkay?

    1. flamingpdog

      HA HA, just like the rest of us oldz, the Earth gets slower, too*. I can't wait until the Earth rotates so slowly that one side of the planet will be a blazing inferno** and the other side will be super-Antarctica and all 50 hyperfantasticabajillion people on the Earth will all have to squeeze into a narrow band of habitability at the sun horizon.FUN!

      *,also
      **getting some practice with that today.

      1. not that Radio

        It's common here in the desert southwest to get 3 weeks or so of 105F during June, which goes back to bearable after the monsoon rains begin. But now THE WHOLE FUCKING COUNTRY HAS 105F and that's pretty weird. Good thing there's no climate change, or this could really be troubling.

        1. flamingpdog

          Actually, until 1990, Denver had never had more than two consecutive days of temperatures over 100 degrees (SE Colorado is a different story). We matched the old record of five consecutive days over 100 degrees just last week. I prefer the plains to the mountains, but I'm having second thoughts these days.

  52. NYNYNYjr

    Arizona News:
    From Scottsdale: Naked man goes on wild carjacking spree, injures 7

    From Phoenix: Michael Marin, ex-Wall Street banker, may have swallowed poison pill during courtroom conviction for arson

    Tomorrow, 111 Degrees and Sunny.

      1. NYNYNYjr

        Come on, cut and paste google. The injuries were not related to nakedness; despite nudity he was thrown from the car in one of his crashes and then got up, immortal-like and car-jacked someone else. He did break both the legs of a near-term pregnant woman.

  53. RavenRant

    OT, but is anyone else noticing the way all our 'liberal' media outlets are pointedly ignoring Fortune's thorough debunking of Issa's Fast and Furious lies?

    1. Negropolis

      But, then they've be forced to correct themselves. And, honestly, besides the actually liberal Rachel Maddow, to try and get a show or network or paper to self-correct is like pulling teeth.

      To be perfectly honest, though, I don't klnow why the hell the administration hadn't corrected this and it took fuckin' Fortune magazine to do it.

      1. RavenRant

        I shouldn't have been surprised that the lying class – who have been thriving unchallenged for a good long while – simply called the Communist Marxist Leninist Stalinist virulently anti-capitalist FORTUNE magazine on their kenyan muslim commie lies.

        Anti-colonialist Mau Mau Kenyan Fortune mag. Pending rebuttal by Dinesh and Newt.

      2. BoroPrimorac

        Why should the administration rush to debunk this when every other non-scandal the republicans have tried to nail this president with has blown up in their faces?

        1. Negropolis

          It may blow up in their faces, but there is always collateral damage, and just enough to make the president appear weak. Whether it was this of the stupid birth certificate bullshit, there is a way to get rid of even the shit that seems half-way legitimate very early on then leaving the most crazy parts of it for the most crazy parts of the opposition.

          I don't care what anyone says, Holder having to face contempt is not good for this president if even a silver lining can be pulled out of it. I used to hear Dems try and spin the Clinton's impeachment in the House as if it was the best thing to ever happen to him. Bullshit.

      1. RavenRant

        Clownhall cited on a so-called 'news show' as a legitimate news organization. This is the site that published the Very Serious news scoop that Michelle Obama's mom was practicing Black Magic Satanist Voodoo in the *sob* WHITE HOUSE!!!1?!!

        Can we start a pool for how long it takes Joe Scarborough's 'liberal' MSNBC to let Sippy KKKup cite Stormfront as a legitimate news source?

      2. not that Radio

        Here is the "debunking". It reads like a semi-literate facebook rant. The writer fails to rebut anything, and then states that "The rest of my rebuttal to Fortune can be completed by reading my book.".

        1. Chichikovovich

          If that's the best Ms. Cupp can do, she's got nothing. The one bit of actual information in the rant is the email from Voth that the author quotes, which she then characterizes as "approving" the gun sales. How is that "approving" anything? Gun show sellers don't need "approval". The default in Arizona is that purchases of guns are always, 100% OK, an assumption defeated only in very restricted circumstances. Thanks to relentless pressure from the NRA and Republicans. Swooping in and arresting someone, when you have no approval from the prosecutors, because the prosecutors rightly judge that the Republican-and-NRA eviscerated vestigial remnants of laws will not support a conviction, is indeed a dumb thing to do and does nothing to prevent the flow of arms.

          The background assumption in all of this seems to be one of those fundamental Republican fantasies: it is possible for law enforcement to ensure that "law abiding citizens" can get every gun they want, whenever they want it, so long as they have enough money [and I'm expecting that the next step is "gun stamps" to ensure that poor (white) "law abiding citizens" can get guns too] but "evil-doers" can't. And law enforcement is magically empowered to prevent "evil-doers" from getting guns, while creating not even the mildest inconvenience for "law abiding citizens".

          But what law enforcement does – all it can do, if it is acting legally – is to enforce the laws that are given to them. If the laws don't prevent certain actions, they don't prevent them, even if it is "evil-doers" who want to perform them. If you want to stop "evil-doers", you need to write laws that will stop them, even if it means "law abiding citizens" might have to face such horrible burdens as waiting for a week before delivery of guns purchased at gun shows, or accepting a computerized database that records purchases.

  54. BoatOfVelociraptors

    Yay! I met Skully and weejee and other people whose names don't rhyme.

  55. RavenRant

    Could climate change induced record high temperatures be accelerating HBS*?

    *Hookworm Brain Syndrome

    1. viennawoods13

      Thank you. I love Stan, and I love that song best. It makes the hair on the back of my neck stand up, which according to Robert Graves is the test of true poetry.

      1. C_R_Eature

        You're very welcome and Enjoy and feel free to find and post your favorites!

        Fogarty's Cove is up there on my All-Time Favorites list, for the music and the evocation of Halifax and the Maritimes. I have some most excellent memories from there. Gives me chills every time I hear it.

        Stan death was a terrible loss. I see a link to his son singing his dad's songs and that makes me happy.

          1. C_R_Eature

            Thanks – that brings back memories! The one on Home in Halifax is great too, with a nice spoken intro.
            I hope your sister saved that album! you're not alone, I know a lot of people who have those Missed Performance stores, I have a few and I never got to see Stan preform either….

          2. viennawoods13

            One of my favorite moments of fleeting fame is when my letter requesting The Mary Ellen Carter was read as the last, the anchor, the ultimate (you get the idea- it was important) on a special 2-hour show on CBC radio on the music of the Rogers brothers, with Garnet as the special guest. I could always sing Barrett's Privateers to my 2 yr old son, but had trouble with Mary Ellen Carter (i really can't sing), and the message of this song is one that I wanted him to get.
            And as I was typing this, that now 22 year old (today!! He's a Canada Day baby!) came into the house on a brief visit. I starting crying literally as I talked to him about this, with the song playing again, because he's had a truly shitty 5 years and things seem to be finally turning around for him. And gave him a hug and a kiss. Sometimes things just seem to come together, don't they? So thanks again for posting that this morning, because without that I doubt it would have occurred to me to go on a Stan binge. and with that- Barrett's Privateers

          3. C_R_Eature

            Thank you. Lovely story and I hope things continue to go well for you and your son. I'm sure this is random (OK, maybe not) but I've has quite a few of these musical Synchronicity moments, when the right tune comes around at exactly the right time. Lucky, I guess.
            Enjoy Stan, your son and the day.

            Now, I wish I was on a Halifax pier!

  56. cheetojeebus

    OT: Mcturtle really stepped in it on 'fox news sunday', "30 million uninsured is not the issue?" Gawd I hate, hate, hate that man.

    1. Chichikovovich

      "30 million uninsured is not the issue?"

      Not any more! And soon the issue will be "30 million people with health insurance that the Republicans want to make uninsured again." And those people have parents, siblings, friends,…. Once they have it, Repubs, taking it away from them is going to be a political catastrophe.

      Hahahaha ….

  57. JimmyPete

    Who is the blond , she looks just like the hot hot witch from Grimm, The one who seduced the Black detective and then lost her powers. Glad to see she still has a job in the world of evil.

  58. dr_pangloss

    “My Lord, The Minisrty of Constutionality Magic has struck down the AMCA (Affordable Muggle Care Act)”

    “Thiisssss Issss Good Newwsssss” *Dark Lord Dred Scott Sweeps from the room to celebrate by killing and eating a Cuban.

    “Look Here” Expendible Flunky#3′

    “What?” Sorceress of the Dark Law Blondie Goldhead

    “Someone’s going to have to give the Dark Lord the Bad News” Blondie Goldhead

    *Gulp* Expendible Flunky#3

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