second amendment remedies

Michigan Republicans’ Ex-Spokesman Wants You To Shoot The Government For Giving You Health Care

Remember when your neighbors used to laugh at you for hoarding survival seed kits and gold coins lo these many years? Well, you’re about to get the last laugh because while they’re stuck living under the iron boot of Saul Alinsky John Roberts’ socialist regime like sheeple, you are locked, loaded, and ready for revolution. And today that revolution is upon us.

Now that poors can get health insurance because the demon Supreme Court sided with that commie muslin NOBAMA fella, the only way to defend our freedom is armed insurrection! Mount up and ride to the sound of the gun says former Michigan Republican Party spokesman Matthew Davis.

Matthew Davis, an attorney in Lansing, sent the email moments after the Supreme Court ruling to numerous new media outlets and limited government activists with the headline: “Is Armed Rebellion Now Justified?”

Davis added his own personal note saying, “… here’s my response. And yes, I mean it.”

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“There are times government has to do things to get what it wants and holds a gun to your head,” Davis said. “I’m saying at some point, we have to ask the question when do we turn that gun around and say no and resist.

If you have an Obama sticker on your car, you maybe want to avoid the local Wal-Mart or Bob Evans parking lots for a few days. Clearly, this health care thing has angered up the rustics something fierce. [Michigan Capitol Confidential]

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About the author

Jeff Wattrick is someone whose unsolicited submissions accidentally get published on Wonkette. He also writes for Deadline Detroit, which is this thing on the internet about the Motor City.

View all articles by Jeff Wattrick

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205 comments

    1. Extemporanus

      Careful…Ol' Doc McCoy gots himself a powerful temper.

      'Member what happened to yer poor Cousin Red when he found out he ain't got the health insurance?

      PEW! PEW!

  1. Ryy

    I hope to god some of these righties start resisting ASAP. I suggest a full armed assault in Tampa. Freedom! Constitution! Kenya!

    1. Terry

      Oh, I hope Tampa is a seriously hot mess. Every frickin GOP and Teabagger malfunction needs to be right up in the open and fighting for attention.

      1. actor212

        I think the SCOTUS guaranteed that today. The large issue that Teabaggers have been up in arms about has been "Obamacare" and that the Supreme Court, with a conservative CJ assenting, affirmed the decision is going to see Tampa make Chicago '68 look like Woodstock

        1. randcoolcatdaddy

          NRA written Florida gun laws, Teabaggers with guns, and the high emotions from the court decision are not a good mix.

          1. scvirginia

            Meh- they'll prolly jus' string up an Obama effigy- they can borrow Pastor Terry's- & sit around the burning crosses toasting marshmallows & swappin' lies…

    2. MittBorg

      Oh, honey, they are DEFINITELY having a shootout at the Tampa corral. Take my word for it. The RonPaulTradz will show up armed and ready to take over the convention, the Republicans will resist, and when the smoke clears, the crying will begin. I want to say something cruel, but I really do believe it's gonna be bad, and I don't have it in me to wish death and suffering on a bunch of people I disagree with about politics.

      1. miss_grundy

        Well, I do. I not only wish death and suffering on them but public humiliation as well. If they shoot each other or other people, then perhaps the greater number of voters, who until now have not been interested in the election, will see these jerks in action and decide to vote Democrat.

        So, party down congenital nincompoops! Show everyone how stupid you all are!

    1. stroge

      oh fuck yea. white conservative men aren't the only people with guns or the desire to beat the shit outta somebody for being a dumbass.

      1. PhilippePetain

        Concur. We've got the cities, the smarts, and the numbers. Oh, and teeth. And we don't have to drive little scooters to move.

    1. CapeClod

      That's why shooting people who don't agree with you is the only rational thing to do.

    2. Negropolis

      That's the beautiful thing about the English language. It's so easy to make up new words.

  2. Callyson

    “You can’t have people walking with lattes and signs and think the object of your opposition is going to take you seriously,” Davis said.

    Um, what? Since when do wingnuts drink lattes? I thought only commie socialist liberals drank those fancy schmancy drinks, while real Americans drink instant…

    1. GhostBuggy

      I would drink Postum (if they still made it). I'm not sure where that puts me, politically.

    2. Poindexter718

      Since when do wingnuts drink lattes?, you ask.
      Since Dunkin Donuts started selling giant milk shake versions of them with unlimited Splenda.

    1. MittBorg

      They've hacked John Roberts' page on Wikipedia. The names they're calling the guy! Just this morning, he was a brilliant legal scholar who was leading them to the Promised Land. Now he's a slimy coward who has sold out to support a UNCONstee-TOO-shun-al ruling.

  3. Lionel[redacted]Esq

    I think we can all recall the fact that the Founders decided to revolt against Great Britain when the British decided to impose health care on the colonies.

    1. James Michael Curley

      Only a few years ago a public statement would have him upfront the bar in 21 days fighting against a 6 or 12 month suspension.

      1. Dumbedup

        that occurred to me too, isn't armed rebellion a violation of the professions rules? No screwing clients, no stealing and no armed rebellion!

        1. Chichikovovich

          And the third one has even been (up to now) generally obeyed by the legal profession (outside the Treason-in-Defense-of-Slavery states).

    2. MittBorg

      Encouraging OTHERS to take up arms for change in America. But he'll defend them on any charges, after they're arrested. Hey, ten per cent off, what more d'ya want?

  4. weejee

    Mrs. weejee informs me that all of our splurge gunz are fully loaded with slightly rancid whipped cream. We're ready!

    1. Fare la Volpe

      our splurge gunz are fully loaded with slightly rancid whipped cream

      Is that what the kids are calling it these days?

    2. Terry

      I have dozens of rotten eggs and live on an upper floor of a high rise. I'm ready for a fun time.

  5. Chick-Fil-Atheist™

    From the asshole's email: "In 2008, we the people elected Barack Obama as president, and the 100-year progressive trek to tyranny begun in 1912 with Woodrow Wilson's election was complete."

    Yup. Especially the Reagan-Bush-Bush contributions toward a fascist, illiterate society.

    1. MacRaith

      Um, if we completed it in 2008, that would be a 96-year trek towards tyranny. Math is one of those liberal things, I guess.

      1. scvirginia

        He prolly meant that the Elders of Zion were already planning the Obama presidency back in 1908.

  6. Lionel[redacted]Esq

    Daddy's rifle in my hand
    felt reassurin'
    He told me,
    Health care means run, son,
    numbers add up to nothin'
    But when the first shot
    hit the docks I saw it comin'
    Raised my rifle to my eye
    Never stopped to wonder why.
    Then I saw black,
    And my face splashed in the sky.

    1. James Michael Curley

      I'm worried about my car with the big Obama Forward sticker getting keyed in the parking lot in white bread suburban NJ.

        1. James Michael Curley

          Sounds like a plan. I already have dozens of the ones they send when you respond to a poll or send in a donation.

      1. Jus_Wonderin

        I have lately thought of putting quite a few Obama signs on my car, then parking it at Walmart….with a hidden camera inside.

        1. James Michael Curley

          In Middlesex county NJ’s Wal-Mart it would probably not faze anyone. Six miles south in Monmouth County all the Wal-Martians would get the vapors and keel over.

          1. Jus_Wonderin

            Well, this is Texas. So I have my choice of Wal-Marts north, south, east and west. Seriously though, I get a bazillion YouTube hits if I could get footage of someone taking their Obamarage out on my (paid for) car.

    2. Lionel[redacted]Esq

      Sorry. When I first read your post, I was hoping that was a sexual euphemism.

  7. Chick-Fil-Atheist™

    Also, is there a liberal arms group? I'll buy a fucking gun and become a lifetime member tout suite if there is… and learn how to shoot it, of course.

      1. Chick-Fil-Atheist™

        Yeah, I just googled. And $25 per month is a bit tight for me… but I guess that's the new paradigm, ennit…?

        I can't wait until I buy a fifty cal and show up at Knob Creek in Kentucky… with my Obama sticker. YEEEE-HAAAAAW!!!!

        1. CleverSobriquet

          Yeah! You definitely want lethality, wounding them will just make them need Obamacare

  8. noodlesalad

    So these fuckers are threatening to kill American cops and soldiers now? When are we allowed to call them traitors?

    1. MacRaith

      Oh, you can call them traitors any time – it's your First Amendment right. But now you can call them traitors and have the facts on your side too.

    2. Negropolis

      I got a head start. I've been calling them traitors for years, especially after 9/11.

  9. edgydrifter

    Blah blah chest-thumping blah. These overfed Wolverine-wannabes talk a big game, but I haven't seen many of them eager to actually take the field. Either shut up and fight, or just shut up. In any case, shut up. I'm looking at you, too, Texas.

      1. TribecaMike

        Most of Baldwin's movies are probably filmed in Vancouver, so he's halfway there already.

    1. Chick-Fil-Atheist™

      Yes, it is funny to consider how the world's greatest volunteer army — the private gun owners of Amercia — is made up of untrained civilians…

  10. Mittens Howell, III

    I remember all these brave patriots, armed to the teeth and marching on Washington back in 2000 to save the nation when the White-House was stolen.

    Oh, my mistake, they were the ones cheering.

  11. Jus_Wonderin

    Is it prescience or insanity that my long dead father (40 years this august) said "One day there will be two sides. You have to pick which side you want to be on."

    He didn't say that as fatherly advice, he stated in the context of some political belief he thought was radical.

    Oh, he was a conservative.

  12. An_Outhouse

    Their little heads must be assploding. The darkie just required welfare for everybody paid for by the most productive members. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. Oh happy day.

  13. coolhandnuke

    We have yet to hear from Ted Nugent today. Please, pretty please Editrix bring us some Nugent…he's gotta be going double gonzo today.

  14. MacRaith

    If clowns like this guy really lived in the kind of society they think they live in, they'd all have been rounded up and sent to FEMA death camps long ago. But they're still free to walk around and spew hateful, fact-free nonsense about the government and the president. Ain't America grand?

    1. GemlikeFlame

      Land that I love, but seriously… Is it just me or are there any coherent rationales for why this is a bad thing?

      I've read all the rants and even the most recent PalinTwitter on the topic but I have yet to have anyone get down to nuts and bolts about what terrible effect this is going to have on whatever it is going to have a terrible effect on. Does anyone really believe that this mandates death panels and the like? Or is this just more Obama-bashing?

      Can somebody explain this to me?

  15. Goonemeritus

    I wish you told me to avoid Bob Evans before I went to all you can eat deep fried Thursdays for lunch.

  16. BaldarTFlagass

    "There are times government has to do things to get what it wants and holds a transvaginal ultrasound wand to your head,” Davis said. “I’m saying at some point, we have to ask the question when do we turn that transvaginal ultrasound wand around and say no and resist."

  17. freakishlywrong

    Crazy fuckers. How in the fuck do mild reforms on a for-profit healthcare system inspire armed rebellion against your own gubbmint? Crazy Mothafuckers.

    1. CommieLibunatic

      Word. I'd like to see these guys' eyeballs explode when they see something REALLY worth getting upset over, like a famine or plague.

      Then again, it's hard to imagine anything worse than the horror of an attractive, intelligent, black Democrat taking the White House.

    2. actor212

      Here's what it will come down to:

      1 asshat will be caught carrying a gun to a rally for a Congresscritter. He'll be arrested, and tried and convicted.

      That is all.

    3. freakishlywrong

      I'd just like to see a member of the vaunted fourth estate ASK that goddamn question.

  18. x111e7thst

    Makes me long for the good old days when the black helicopters of the world government would just have swooped down on this fucker and carted him off to face a death panel.

    1. real_dc_native

      Wait – does this ruling mean we get our death panels now? That's Great because I still have my list!

  19. TribecaMike

    Oh goody, I've wanted to see a replay of Shay's Rebellion for ages! Or is this a lot more like the Whiskey Rebellion?

  20. fartknocker

    I suspect the amount of bullshit currently being broadcasted by Fox News and the WSJ would make John Deere envious. It is fun watching there heads implode over the court's ruling.

  21. MissTaken

    I done read that these so-called doctors like to stick a camera up your butt and take a pikshur. Wut you think the guvmint gonna do with them there picshures, huh??!1/ I ain't lettin nobody take a pictuur of my buttt!!11!!

    1. SorosBot

      But it's perfectly OK to force the doctors to stick a camera in your vajayjay if you want an abortion.

      1. glamourdammerung

        Now, to be fair, have you all thought maybe it is not that they are anti-abortion as much as they just like shoving cameras inside women?

        I guess we will have to see what gets added to the Federal Flood Insurance next to see if my theory is valid.

    2. prommie

      Thats just a cover for what they're really doing, which is planting secret surveillance chips what can read your thoughts up there in your butt.

  22. Crank_Tango

    Let's wait to hear what noted constitutional scholars Chuck Norris and Ted Nugent have to say on the subject.

  23. coolhandnuke

    This might be news to Davis and his paramilitary fantasies, but there are legions of progressives who can (and have) skillfully execute(d) a head shot with an M16 from 500 yards and can deliver some hand-to-hand whoop ass like he has never seen or felt.

    1. Jimmyone

      Yeah, these wackos just don't get it…Some of us older hippie types like guns too, and we knows which end to point. Not all the skills learned during the 60's and 70's have been lost.

  24. Estproph

    I can't wait for them to try to overthrow the government. This should be entertaining. There's not enough Cheetos for them to supply an army.

  25. Extemporanus

    The Tree Of Diabetes must be refreshed from time to time with the blood sugar of doctors & patients.

    1. AbandonHope

      Yes, but this time we should just let 'em. I think they greatly overestimate their importance.

    2. weejee

      Oh I don't know, they make out like bandits when it comes to where tax Ameros are spent vrs. where they are collected.

  26. James Michael Curley

    Obama has destroyed more jobs and ruined my company. I just signed a long term contract for wheel barrow rentals so my employees can cart the bodies of ailing poors off the streets.

  27. SayItWithWookies

    But if there isn't needless suffering in America, how will the rich know they're better than everybody else?

  28. Jus_Wonderin

    Isn't it a bit foolish to try to revolt against a country who spends more on its defense than any other country on the globe…ever?

      1. Jus_Wonderin

        Why can't we have Phasers? Just us, not them. But, really, why can't we have Phasers? It doesn't even need a “STUN” setting.

  29. Antispandex

    Look, they had all of this champagne bought, the "see we told you so" parties were planned, all of their "I was against Obama care before it was popular" speeches were written…can you blame a guy for being pissed?

  30. glamourdammerung

    I would think that advocating a criminal act would get one removed from the bar.

  31. chascates

    Stalwart defender of the poor Rush Liimbaugh opined on today's show that this is going to hurt poor people the most, because the states are broke, BROKE, (since they got rid of all taxes except 'sin' taxes) and the states are the ones who will have to pay for this.
    A CATO institute spokesman on NPR said it'll hurt more than poor people because the now insurance companies will be forced to give people with preexisting conditions they worst sort of medical care.

  32. thesuniverse

    What the fuck is going on with my state? I mean, I get the chronic unemployment and rotting infrastructure can make people cranky, but have they stopped pumping Xanax in our water supply?

  33. MittBorg

    Any minute now, some of his fine, upstanding fellow-citizens will be trundled into the ER, having shot off their teensy weensy little dickie-birds by attempting to comply with his call to armed insurrection.

    Jeeze, these people are too fucking pathetic for words. What are the penalties for inciting armed insurrection, again?

    1. miss_grundy

      An idiotic HVAC technician on a job site in Birmingham, MI shot off part of his peen when he was moving his Glock around his waistband. It's a shame he missed the femoral artery because it at least would have thinned the herd by one member….

      1. MittBorg

        I was thinking of that fine, not-so-upstanding-any-longer gentleman, actually. Hopefully, he has taken himself out of the gene pool without contributing to its further deterioration.

  34. sullivanst

    Davis, why don't you join your other highly intellectually developed conservative friends and escape the horrible scourge of the government acting to expand healthcare access to as many Americans as possible by fleeing to Canada? You're almost there already!

  35. Allmighty_Manos

    My grandpa didn't fight in WWII to defend my right to stiff hospitals so I could get out of buying health insurance just to see some Commie judge to take it away.

  36. Guppy

    Oh boy! He's about to have long, uncomfortable meetings with the Secret Service and the Marshals Service! Not even the Nuge has pulled that one off (yet)!

  37. sullivanst

    To the reeducation camp with him!

    (Can you reeducate someone who has yet to be educated?)

  38. Chichikovovich

    This guy lives in Michigan, but I'd just like to make sure it is noted in the record that he is an Ohio State grad.

  39. owhatever

    He is so cute when he's mad. Just a fuzzy little muppet with a hinged mouth but an unhinged brain. When I first read his post, I thought he was offering to turn the gun around and commit suicide, and I supported that choice.

  40. elburritodeluxe

    We can call it the Rascal Rebellion!
    Crazed teabaggers will turn their motorized wheelchairs into Technicals, mounted with recoilless rifles.
    Run (or walk quickly) for the hills, Libruls!

  41. OurHoboSenator

    I've been avoiding Bob Evans for almost twenty years, since my last grandparent died.

  42. real_dc_native

    I get it now. We've lined the souther border with stupid states like Texas and Arizona. Now Michigan is bravely protecting our northern border with a stupid buffer. We don't need to worry about Canadians sneaking into the country with states like Michigan lining the border!

Comments are closed.